just like mind your own business if this does apply to you

what sign placements need to work on

🌙 MOON SIGNS:- 🌙

Aries moon: You need to stop rushing into things because you feel like it. You’ve likely been told this a million times but you’re not completely convinced anything’s worth being patient for. As an Aries moon, you have a deep need to get things done, move on with life, as fast as possible, it’s always “on to the next one” … losing an opportunity because you didn’t act on your impulse fast enough would be a nightmare to you. When Mars’ ruling sign is in the moon, impulse is a key word especially when it comes to emotions. You need to learn that feeling strongly about something does NOT always mean you have to act on it. You choose to ignore that sometimes it is possible to act too early for example, coming on too strong with potential partners and scaring them off, or expecting someone to get over upsetting events quicker than they can and dismissing them when they can’t. Use your head for once. You need to be aware that what you feel and what you do, don’t always have to be aligned. It may be better not to start something rashly that would be a waste of productive time so… do learn to weigh the pros and cons (something your sister sign Libra excels at). Normally what happens is you start something on an impulse but you grow bored of it quickly and divert your attention elsewhere. You excel at initiation, but you lack endurance and perseverance. This emotional need for excitement and new projects can hold you back in your life, especially in most careers where skill like patience and perseverance are highly sought after or required. Also, just because you move on from things quickly doesn’t mean everyone else does. Learn to be respectful of others’ pacing and approaches even if it doesn’t feel “right” to you - not everything is about you and you are not the world authority on the right way to feel no matter how much it feels like you are, ESPECIALLY when you’re so painfully oblivious to any depth or causes behind your emotions.

Taurus moon: You need to learn to get your mind out of the gutter. If you don’t, you will never grow emotionally. With a fixed earth moon, you genuinely believe holding on to things is the ‘right’ approach, even if these things are currently of no use or value, out of fear that you’ll need them later. This applies to both possessions and principles. You’re so stubborn with your beliefs and you’re well aware of this… The reason most of you choose to do nothing about this is because you’d rather stick to what you know and be wrong than to risk adopting a new belief or approach that proves to be ineffective and a waste of your time. This leads to stagnancy and a feeling of being stuck… And you know why! STOP letting your deep seated fear of change and ‘losing’ valuable things/people hold you back from taking risks and leaps out of your comfort zone. STOP letting your emotional need to be absolutely sure of details/pros and cons hold you back from iniating or making a move in relationships or careers. Time isn’t forever, you know this better than most. What you need to do with all this fixedness is ACTIVELY challenge your schemas and thoughts. Learn to prioritise rationality over comfort and it will become gradually easier to step out of your comfort zone. Unlike Aries, you excel at persevering but lack initiative. Wouldn’t it be better to start something without being completely sure of all the details and pros and cons and slowly become more certain over time than to lose an opportunity because you were too busy meticulously assessing if it was worth the time and effort? And if you end up at a disadvantage then at least you know for certain whether it is worth your time or not. Let. Things. Go. Your way is NOT always the ‘right’ way of approaching things just because it feels comfortable or practical to you. You need to learn to be more tolerant of others’ approaches to things. You’d think you’d have learned that by now with all your apparent love for peace…

Gemini moon: You need to find stability in every aspect of life, especially emotionally. All that chaotic Mercury energy might seem fun and great at first, but gemini moon natives can find themselves feeling lost, confused and annoyed with their scattered mind. It is therefore extremely important to find some grounding influence if you want to achieve personal growth and, for this particular moon, a way to calm the restless mercurial energy or risk imploding in on yourself with your propensity to rationalise and analyse your emotions instead of simply feeling them. One way you can express this is through communicating/teaching others or stimulating your nearly insatiable intellectual abilities through being the student and learning new things. Your strength lies in your resourcefulness and ability to bounce back from most difficult situations. This changeable nature also means your moods are like the wind.. fleeting and unpredictable, the Gemini moon combines the mutable signs’ adaptability and the air signs’ abstracted and detached logic. You need to learn to develop empathy for others or at least be supportive of their emotions rather than dismissive. You need to stop avoiding working through your emotions and get over with the painful process sooner rather than later. Being ruled by the planet of communication is no excuse for being insensitive to the emotional needs of others and/or your own. Most importantly, you need to find a core. Stick to your plans, see what happens.

Cancer moon: Stop giving into your emotions. While you do feel emotions more strongly than most, you let them control you too much and they guide all of your actions. In order for this moon to reach true self-actualisation you must develop objectivity. You have to develop your rational skills and actively attempt to distance yourself emotionally from situations; this will be extremely difficult but it is vital for your growth and it will help you feel more in control of your emotions. Moreover, you need to stop being so stuck in the past - your sentimentality means your past or childhood memories had profound effects on you that you tenaciously cling to, but you must let go and live in the present, look towards the future. The possibility are endless which is why looking to the past to guide the present and future is so detrimental and counterproductive. Learn that clinging onto things that are already slipping away wont keep them in place, it will only elongate the healing period. You know this. You have a tendency to wallow in self pity though… Stop being self-involved and divert your enormous emotional capacity to others, that’s when you are at your best. You also need to learn to take risks in relationships and become less guarded - not everyone will hurt you.

Leo moon: You need to stop being so dependent on attention or praise from others to feel emotionally secure. Moreover, having an enormous emotional need to be recognised is not an excuse to demand attention from everyone you love. Stop assuming you are everyone’s top priority cause really you’ll just end up hurting yourself with this assumption. It’s childish and arrogant to expect everyone to pay undivided attention to you all the time and you know this and yet… You still continue to do it? Just because others give you a free pass to be as demanding and bossy and self-absorbed as you wish to be doesn’t mean it’s ok for you to grow complicit with this, no matter how much you want to be. Your optimism is contagious and your will so strong it’s infectious, thus therein lies the problem: pride. You are always under the deluded assumption that you are right and everyone else’s opinions are inferior, wrong or irrelevant but you must work on being more open to criticism and correction from others, otherwise you’ll drive people away with your prideful insistence and stubborn refusal to admit you are wrong. You must also work on adopting more reasonable expectations of the people you love as you often demand a lot.

Virgo moon: You need to adopt a more forgiving, positive lens for the faults you find in others and yourself. While your high standards and nitpicky nature allow you to achieve great accomplishment and have competent capabilities, they can ultimately be your downfall. Stop being so critical of yourself and others out of a mistaken assumption that it’s helpful and necessary. Sometimes focusing on your strengths and positive traits is what’s needed in a situation. Your perfectionist and obsessive tendencies can make you go over the same thing several times which actually conflicts with the productiveness and efficiency you so desperately need in order to feel emotionally secure. In order to achieve self growth, you must accept that you cannot achieve perfection or you’ll spend your entire life chasing it. The best thing you can do is give things your best. Tell yourself there was nothing more you could’ve done, which is normally true. Burn out your restless mercurial energy through analysis or other forms of detailed communication, but do not rely on this. To reach full potential you must be able to remain calm in moments of chaos which you despise. Skip or change routines.

Libra moon: You need to stop depending on others’ companionship to develop your own personality and/or feel emotionally secure. In order to self-actualise you must learn to be comfortable and confident on your own. Realise your own worth by going out alone, eating alone, staying in alone etc until you’re comfortable with being left alone. Stop letting others decide things for you. You need to develop your decisiveness and not let people take advantage of your easygoing personality. While you do require equality in a relationship, you can be a bit of a pushover with others in fear of being left alone if you assert yourself. That’s not healthy. Work on standing up for yourself and making your own decisions - ignore your superficial desires to have companionship and realise that this is vital to your personal growth. Also there is a tendency to be somewhat detached and rational with emotions, so you need to make a conscious effort to be more empathetic to others’ emotions.

Scorpio moon: You MUST stop trying to control everything and everyone. Manipulating others and controlling them will not ensure their loyalty to you. What sense does it make to control what can’t be controlled? And yet you never stop trying. Closing yourself off from people to avoid betrayal is unproductive and unwise. You may be eliminating any chances of betrayal, but you’re also effectively denying yourself any meaningful relationships and emotional intimacy with others - an integral need of the Scorpio moon. You need to put more trust and faith in people. Not everyone is out to get you. Isolating yourself does not make you invincible, it will only make you miserable.

Sagittarius moon: You need to let yourself form meaningful relationships with people without getting flighty. Your biggest issue is emotional commitment. Even all the traveling in the world won’t necessarily make you feel whole, as enlightened as you pretend to be. You want constant excitement and stimulation but you need to learn to make do with what you have and enjoy the simple things in life… The world won’t be accommodating to your need for variety and change, so you feel smothered by routines and any stagnancy. You need to learn that committing to things is not a punishment, but actually reap many benefits - especially with Jupiter watching over you. You also must learn to develop a sense of empathy and respect towards others’ emotions as your bluntness comes off as insensitive and irreverent (and it is). Not everyone moves on as quickly as you.

Capricorn moon: You have an innate sense of self-control and resilience which are both your greatest strength and weaknesses. Your need to have things in order and in control hinders your potential to grow, explore and learn because you’re so terrified of making mistakes in the first place. You think sticking to what you know/the comfort zone will stop you from making mistakes because it’s already ‘tried and tested’. However, you must experiment and develop some versatility to truly learn. Making no errors doesn’t teach you anything. With the moon in detriment, you are uncomfortable openly expressing emotions and affection and prefer to keep it under wraps. The main challenge with Capricorn moon is to overcome the saturnian ‘block’ and express their feelings and emotional needs without shame. Capricorn moon is terrified of emotional intimacy however and preoccupies themselves with work and career. There is a deep need to be productive and useful which they often focus on fulfilling when their need for firm yet gentle guidance/love is unfulfilled. You must learn to open up to those who care about you and thrive on a little disorder to achieve self-actualisation. Learn to enjoy rewards without feeling guilty.

Aquarius moon: You need to stop searching for your identity through global causes. You disguise your detached insensitivity behind a faux-altruistic worldly veneer, as a transparent attempt to hide the fact that you don’t really know yourself. You stubbornly refuse to interact with your emotions outside of analysing them and you must learn to acknowledge them sooner or later! It’s just over quicker when you make the right decision and address this weakness early on. What happens often is Aquarius Moons often neglect figuring out who they are deep down and instead preoccupy themselves with global issues that they find more “noble” and “important”. However there is no way of achieving personal growth without knowing yourself on an inner level. Don’t be complicit in this cycle of obliviousness.. you’d think you’d have learned to break this routine by now when your moon is ruled by Uranus.

Pisces moon: You need to learn to stop yourself from getting lost and drifting off in foggy daydreams. When Neptune meets the moon, the imagination is rich and vibrant. There is a tendency to maladaptive daydreaming and escapist tendencies which can turn dangerous if this leads to addiction/substance abuse. Work on being more in touch with reality and the menial world. It’ll keep you in check. Face your emotions and fears head on, stop running away! Avoid your flight tendencies and stick to a plan, make lists, all sorts of menial tasks that engage you with the “real world”. Do anything to keep yourself from losing your grip and giving into unhealthy temptations.

🌐 MERCURY SIGNS:- 🌐

Aries mercury: Learn to just… pause for a second and read in between the lines. Actually think about things… The surface level won’t always be honest to you. Learn to rationalise thoughts and weigh the pros and cons.

Taurus mercury: Learn how to open your damn mind. It’s a cliche phrase only because few actually invest mental energy in developing tolerance to other viewpoints and very few actively challenge their fixed schemas. Regardless, that is what you need to do to achieve a ‘growth mindset’. You want practical advice? Actually listen to what others are saying, not what you can prove wrong. Prioritise logic and rationality over your comfort in sticking to mental routines. It will be uncomfortable but it’s vital for your growth.

Gemini mercury: Learn to look at the details. Stop skimming over everything, that will inevitably bite you in the ass if you keep looking for the ‘gist’ of things. Also learn to develop mental endurance. You excel at absorbing a variety of information and mental versatility but you get distracted too easily. Some things are worth paying attention more than 2 seconds for… Every time you catch yourself diverting your attention, be proactive. Force yourself to go back and see if you missed anything worthy/important.

Cancer mercury: Stooooop linking every mental stimulus to your past and stop confusing your sentimental insistence on using the same emotion-based approach for practicality. You might have a rich imagination and great memory, but you need to learn to be more rational. Try to memorise things in different ways. Pay more attention to reality and the present.

Leo mercury: Ok 1) stop yelling and 2) stop blowing everything out of proportion. Constantly exaggerating details will eventually get in the way of your not-so-subtle goal to be credible/recognised and respected.

Virgo mercury: You need to learn to look at the big picture. Nitpicking over tiny and often irrelevant details may have bode well in high school but it can cause you to miss the point or answer that is in plain sight. Perfectionist tendencies make you go over things a million times paying utmost attention to all the little things and… this reductionist and obsessive way of thinking ironically gets in the way of the efficiency you claim to prioritise.

Libra mercury: You need to learn to be more decisive, and more importantly learn that extremes are not necessarily inferior. If you act as a mediator in an argument, actually try and reach a practical solution and/or conclusion instead of just endlessly weighing abstract pros and cons. Learn to think on your feet. Some decisions are better made with less deliberation. Prioritise productiveness over logical assessment. As for indecisiveness, if you’re stuck between two decisions flip a coin or use an online decision maker for more than two decisions and in the moment it takes to generate a choice, you’ll know what decision YOU want to make as you’ll find yourself secretly wishing for it. If you genuinely are unsure, go with the decision the generator made. This will help you become more confident in making decisions.

Scorpio mercury: You need to learn to accept that sometimes there’s no depth to things. Learn when to stop probing and go … probe somewhere else instead of wasting your time. Some people really are that shallow. Some jokes really are that inexplicably bad. Some information really is that cryptic and you can’t figure it out simply because you don’t know all the information. Stop over thinking every single thing. Some things are a lot simpler than you think they are. Save your time. Distract yourself with something intense or complicated enough to override your overly analytical​ mind.

Sagittarius mercury: Stop preaching oh my god.. giving a generic ass answer to faux-deep questions does not make you a philosopher. Learn to look at the details. Also stop being oblivious to how blunt you are, it can be detrimental to your growth. Learn to exercise self awareness in the way you communicate.

Capricorn mercury: You need to learn to pay attention to what you can’t see. Like the other earth mercuries and Aries, what you see is what you believe. Only looking at things at face value holds you back from mental self-actualisation, along with that God complex. You think ignoring whatever’s between the lines in favour of logic is practical and yet ironically insist your line of thinking is right to the point of bias. Focus less on what’s ‘efficient and productive’ and more on detached logic as well as paying attention to the unobservable.

Aquarius mercury: Stop thinking you have all the answers holy fucking God complex… You claim to be tolerant and open minded but go off at or shun anyone who doesn’t share your opinions, even when evidence is presented. Work on being less rigid with your opinions and accept that others might know more than you/be more ~globally aware~ than you.

Pisces mercury: Learn to like…. be present. Stop daydreaming your life away. Stop giving in to your indulgent fantasies. It’s not productive, but that’s foreign language to you anyway. Basically actively remind yourself to pay attention to the real world, and in detail. Set external reminders. Do you really wanna look back on your life realising you wasted most of it daydreaming? You’re a deep thinker in a way the other signs aren’t, but on the downside there’s a reason Mercury is in detriment when it’s in Pisces. Your path to mental actualisation may be more difficult for you than others, but that’s why it’s so VITAL that you start now if you haven’t already. A developed Pisces Mercury has all the answers to the questions no one knows. Don’t let yourself slip away. Even if it’s tempting.

♀ VENUS SIGNS:- ♀

Aries venus: You know relationships can like… have a few moments of quiet right? Like it’s possible to have a fun and exciting relationship without going to a different rollercoaster or nearly dying every day. You need to learn to pause every now and then and actually think about what your partner would enjoy, because half the time you just seem like a chaotic bumbling mess incapable of just chilling for a while. Learn to COMPROMISE in relationships like your sister sign Libra. Venus is in detriment in Aries so it’s hard for sentimentality or romance to be expressed. The relationship doesn’t have to be fun 24/7 or about doing things. If it is then the relationship isn’t about being in love with the person let’s be real it’s just about doing things you feel like doing, just with a companion. Learn that it’s ok to just stay in sometimes. It doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship is stagnating or the spark is dying or that you’re ‘settling’ - you may simply be growing through the relationship by feeling secure enough in the union to do stuff you wouldn’t normally do. Also liking someone doesn’t mean you have to immediately jump into a relationship, try extending the chase for a while and you might be pleasantly surprised how fun that stage is. Outside of the area of relationships, you can be impulsive with regards to finances and you indulge in immediate gratification. Learn to CONSERVE, hold back and appreciate the beauty in things. And the next time you try to show a friend or someone you care about an appreciative gesture, consider lending them an ear without judgement instead of suggesting a fun night out for faux-selfless reasons..

Taurus venus: You need to learn to be more spontaneous in relationships. You are very loyal and stable and therein lies your weakness. Learn to take risks in relationships whether you’re attempting to start one or in a deeply committed one. Stop using the fact that you’re ‘settled down’ as an excuse to be lazy and complicit. You can have fun outside your comfort zone… You just take a while to assess whether a relationship is worth investing in or not. Keep in mind that they won’t wait forever though, better to take a chance in a relationship and realise it’s not going to work than to miss the opportunity to start one because you kept wondering if you should take the risk… At least then you’ll know for sure. Aside from relationships, Taurus Venus can be very indulgent so they must be careful not to over indulge and become lazy and too preoccupied with worldly pleasures. You need to stop focusing on your own comfort. Take chances. Change up the routine. Don’t let life become stagnant. Just because something feels comfortable doesn’t mean it’s healthy.

Gemini venus: As a mercurial Venus, you need to talk less and do more in relationships. You’re not fooling anyone by just being verbally expressive, your actions have to back up your words. Stop freaking out when someone says the words settling down. You can have a healthy, exciting relationship even when you commit to someone. Outside of relationships, you really just need to listen to people, like actually listen to what they’re trying to say between the lines instead of listening to wait for your turn to speak. You give up on pleasures easily, the type to give up on a show two episodes in because it’s not mentally stimulating enough or too boring. Stop that. Learn to be patient.

Cancer venus: You need to stop being a creature of comforts and stop being so reliant on reassurance. Work up the courage to be affectionate with people even if they aren’t reassuring you 24/7 and actively challenge any insecure thoughts when the people you love aren’t around you. Learn to be more independent, not everyone appreciates clinginess - not to mention this placement is more likely to have dependency issues. Get out of the house, have fun by yourself. Learn that a relationship is strongest when you don’t need reassurance because the security between the people in the relationship is that unbreakable. Outside of relationships, there is a tendency for comfort eating or comfort spending if the wallet allows it. You need to develop confidence and security from within rather than from these external factors. Learn to let go of past hurts.

Leo venus: You need to learn to be more reasonable with your expectations. You have a larger-than-life, almost childlike view of love and these demanding expectations can be exhausting and even crippling to the people in your life who can’t give you the flamboyant over-the-top grandiose displays of affection you dream about. This is disappointing to you, but not everything can be grand all the time - a lesson that must be learned when the Sun’s shining hot rays meet Venus. That doesn’t mean your partner/friends/family love you any less, they may simply have a more toned-down way of expressing love. Loving you can be… expensive. Leo expects grandiose luxury 24/7 and this can lead to over indulgence and laziness in relationships. Leo Venuses may also be impulsive with their spending and always treat themselves if the wallet allows it. Keep an eye on this and control your appetite for luxury in order to grow. Be considerate of your partner’s needs/other people’s needs rather than endlessly thinking about how they don’t measure up to YOUR ideals.

Virgo venus: Venus falls in Virgo so the planet’s desire for calmness, beauty and social grace conflicts with Virgo’s critical, nitpicking, finnicky nature. Stop being so quick to judge others’ appearance and point out their flaws just because they don’t match up to your extremely high standards. These standards can be unreasonable. You constantly criticise those you love because you think it helps improve them, yet you are extremely sensitive to any criticism thrown at you. In order to reach personal growth you need to develop confidence in your appearance and self worth to the point where you are unaffected by outside criticisms. You also need to express your appreciation for those you love in more positive ways, like compliments. Constant criticism will make no one think kindly of you, despite your seemingly good intentions… Insecure virgo venuses can be critical out of a dissatisfaction with their own appearance. Work on being more reasonable and less judgemental.

Libra venus: You need to work on your sincerity. You’re friendly and peace-loving so people enjoy your company but you have a tendency to treat all people the same, regardless of how close or distant you are, bringing your sincerity into question. You yourself often wonder if you like people or if you only like the idea of them but you rarely probe beneath the surface to avoid awkwardness. Your interactions can therefore be quite superficial. You value respect and peace above all so you may be reluctant to bring up issues in relationships. Learn to stop avoiding conflict and address important​ issues even if it disrupts the peace. Stop thinking of people as abstract concepts and really decide whether or not you like certain people. This will help eliminate miscommunication and any resentment from the other party.

Scorpio venus: Love doesn’t have to be painful and dramatic in order to be transformative. Your need for over the top drama in relationships can be tiring and exhausting to others. Stop relying on intense drama to work out your trust issues. Instead, you need to work on challenging your paranoia of being betrayed, letting go of control in relationships and avoid guilt-tripping/manipulating people into staying in the relationships. When Pluto is expressed through Venus, there is a tendency to destroy relationships before they even start (and then some more destruction if it does take off). Just because you find love painful and messy doesn’t mean you have to make it that way for the people who care about you. Stop treating them as toys that need to be tested. Address YOUR trust issues directly to achieve personal growth and form/maintain healthy, strong relationships. With this venus there is a strong attraction to the taboo so be careful, don’t get carried away by your desires.

Sagittarius venus: Stop looking at people as “experiences” to be tried. In order to achieve growth and fulfilment you need to surround yourself with loyal and caring people who don’t disregard your need for freedom and independence. But for full self-actualisation, you need to realise that commitment and freedom are not simultaneously exclusive; instead of leaving relationships the second you’re not stimulated, try waiting it out. Learn to develop patience with your friends and people you love. Not everyone can be intellectually stimulating 24/7. Avoid buying too many souvenirs when traveling.

Capricorn venus: Learn to enjoy pleasure without feeling guilty and learn to loosen up and quit treating relationships like a business contract. If you keep assessing the costs and benefits of relationships you may miss out on an opportunity, not to mention this cold and calculated approach to relationships makes it lose its sentiment. Sometimes it’s better to just jump in even if you don’t know how much you have to lose. This is not to say you are cold and calculated, but you hide your warmness behind a cool veneer. The problem is, most people won’t/forget to look beyond the surface level. Therefore, you must put in an effort in being more socially trusting, warm and at ease until you actually feel less tense and stiff. Not that it matters. You’ll likely distract yourself with work anyways….

Aquarius venus: Learn that don’t have to prove your uniqueness to the world through your partners. Aquarius venuses often enjoy being in progressive relationships and challenging traditions. This stems from your fear of being tied own down and discomfort with traditions that make no rational sense. This is fine, but do not toy with others’ affection for you out of a need to prove something. You can be in a stable and committed relationship while still being progressive - you need to understand they aren’t mutually exclusive. Moreover, you can be careless with or oblivious to the needs of other people in relationships. Most people have no idea how you feel about them. Take initiative and explicitly let them know. Work on being more attuned to the other person’s needs, even if they feel “lesser” than your own “global humanitarian” ones. Ironic that this needs to be mentioned to a sign that seemingly values equality..

Pisces venus: Learn to set boundaries in your relationships. Don’t let people manipulate you, walk all over you or completely disregard your basic needs and get away with it just because you think you love them/care about them. Setting boundaries will not get in the way of forming relationships/finding Tru Love (if you believe in that). In fact it channels and filters the purest and most transformative forms of love towards you. You also need to stop projecting your idealistic standards onto the people you love - you will start to associate love with disappointment inevitably because most people wont live up to your unrealistic standards. You may not realise how unrealistic they are, but wherever Neptune goes, there is danger of illusion and deception. You also need to put more action into showing people you care because your displays of affection can be too abstract. Just BE there. Finally, stop giving in to escapist tendencies. Don’t fall into temptations. When neptune meets Venus, there is danger of addiction/substance abuse or at best maladaptive daydreaming. You are not doomed. Simply learn to control your temptations. Pisces also co-rules Jupiter so there are overindulgent tendencies. Be proactive. Actively try and catch yourself indulging in escapism and force yourself to snap out of it if you can. Jupiter will keep an eye out for you.

♂ MARS SIGNS:- ♂

Aries mars: Stop being so rash in your decision making! You’ve heard this before and you probably got into trouble many times but you always seem to bounce right back. But if you don’t exercise self restraint and control you will land yourself in irreversible trouble one day. Immediate gratification will never give you the high achievements you so ambitiously seek. You HAVE to learn endurance and patience.

Taurus mars: You HAVE to learn adaptability. Your fixedness and stubbornness work well in persevering and career accomplishment but it also means a lack of malleability, difficulty in bouncing back. You may be tough to break, but once you’re broken it’ll be difficult to put you back together unless you learn to be versatile. Don’t have your mind set on one thing, always have back ups in case things don’t work out. You are not always right and you will end up pushing people away with your rigidity. Learn to compromise. Control your temper when you finally do blow up - this placement has a tendency to push down anger in moments where they can be righteously angry and then build this up until it turns to rage and comes out at completely inappropriate moments. Curb this. Learn to speak up when something angers you right then and there instead of holding on to your anger… Little to no good comes out of this.

Gemini mars: Watch your tongue! With Mercury meeting Mars, you have a propensity for saying hurtful things in arguments. You need to learn to control your crass indifference to others’ emotions when you feel threatened. You need to realise that it’s not acceptable to discard emotional values and principles in order to assert your intellectual superiority e.g. spilling secrets/insulting things the other person is insecure about/using manipulation, etc. There is a tendency to be deceitful and flighty in arguments and life in general here, so you must develop perseverance instead of taking the easier way out. Once you do this, you will be a worthy opponent.

Cancer mars: You MUST learn to stop resorting to, or more often relying on, manipulative tendencies. Mars is in fall when it enters Cancer so it can be more difficult to develop the placement’s strengths and thus there is a tendency to rely on the weaknesses instead. There has to be a way for you to get your point across or win the argument without victimising yourself and demonising the other person/people. You need to learn to assert yourself in the moment express your anger the instant it comes up, instead of holding on to your anger like Taurus Mars. When you do this, your outbursts will seem more reasonable and less confusing and deluded to other people… Make an active effort to be as DIRECT as possible. Say things plainly and explicitly. Soon you will develop more confidence in your assertions and you will feel less defensive about everything. Being rational is very, very hard for this placement when mad which is why you have to start working on this from an early age whether it’s through simple common sense mantras that engage your intellectual mind or taking anger management classes. When you’re angry, the whole world revolves around you. It doesn’t matter to you how the other person feels, you’re blind to this when you blow up despite, or perhaps because of, how empathetic you are generally. All that matters in that moment is that YOU feel hurt. You have to work on being less self-absorbed when irritated, or dangerous things can happen as a result of your blind rage. Learning to prioritise rationality over your own feelings is a must for this placement. Also stop fronting and acting like you’re tougher than you really are… it could land you in deep shit one day if you go looking for trouble to prove your worth. Regardless of how powerless or insecure you feel, your manipulation is maladaptive and must be actively curbed. If and only if you take a proactive stance against this will you start developing confidence from WITHIN, and succeed in all aspects of life regardless of oppositions.

Leo mars: You must learn how to be objective and less self-involved. Simply yelling that you’re the best doesn’t make it true - it in fact conveys self-esteem issues. While you do have a natural confidence, this confidence is highly dependent on the reassurance and praise of others which you manage to constantly receive, so is it really confidence? Your journey to self-actualisation has to begin with developing confidence in your own worth regardless of the attention you get. Also stop being so prideful and rigid, it’s not productive and it’s a waste of time. You’re not always right, that’s a fact - the only way to know if you ARE right in a particular issue is to step back and shove your ego aside and look at the situation from a distance, from different perspectives, etc… THAT is how you know for sure. Learn that letting go and/or considering alternate viewpoints is to your advantage too. Learn to listen to others, accept that they may have better ideas than you. How can you expect any one to believe the whole confidence act if you’re so easily provoked by the tiniest perceived slight?

Virgo mars: Another Mercury-ruled Mars like Gemini, you need to watch your tongue. Stop using the fact that your sharp-tongued criticisms are factually observable as an excuse to berate others, especially if you attack weaknesses they let you see/ told you they’re insecure about. You’re not as mature you think you are when you’re angry, in fact you can be quite relentlessly petty from all the built up restless frustration that comes with being a co-ruler of Mercury. This gives you an immense drive to intellectualise why you’re right… which is also borderline childish. You need to work on your hypocrisy if you expect anyone to take your criticisms seriously/be affected by them, especially when you’re the type to constantly dish out criticism but unable to take any. You also need to work on being more accepting of other people’s approaches - like Leo and Aquarius, you have a hard time believing others know better/more than you or have better ideas and approaches. You have to accept that you’re not the authority on how to do things ‘right’ if you want to achieve personal growth. Zooming in on and obsessing over details isn’t always as efficient as you think it is, this finnicky nitpicking can actually be your worst enemy and a waste of productive time - learn to look at the big picture. The whole is not the sum of its parts.

Libra mars: You MUST learn to be more decisive and straightforward​. Endlessly weighing the pros and cons in tense situations is rarely productive - sometimes a quick, swift decision needs to be made. In order for you to grow as a person, you need to be able to think on your feet. You have a tendency to insert yourself into arguments to act as the “mediator” but fail to reach a concrete solution or conclusion out of fear of ruffling any feathers/escalating the tension or due to getting lost in weighing the situation. Don’t do that, don’t appoint yourself as the mature mediator if you won’t take mature actions. Learn to directly tell someone if you think they’re wrong instead of beating around the bush - chances are, their reactions will be the same. Learn to explicitly express and assert your needs to others instead of dropping hints… The worst that could happen is they ignore it, but that’s almost a given with your passive aggressive approach.

Scorpio mars: You MUST let go of control and stop being so defensive. Like Cancer Mars, you can be easily provoked but not out of feeling hurt, but rather out of paranoia that your privacy is being invaded or the implication that you don’t have as much control over things as you think you do. Guess what, you don’t. The sooner you accept this, the quicker the path to self-actualisation will be. You’re sensitive and hyperaware of power struggles as a result of a deepseated fear of losing the upper hand and being on the lower end of the scale. This may have been spurred by potential feelings of powerlessness early in life. Regardless, you need to let go of your need for control. You need to stop resorting to manipulation or downright ruthlessness to get what you want. Control your emotional impulses that urge you to display dominance… A developed Scorpio Mars won’t need to display it. Thrive on the loss of power rather than fearing it; Scorpio is ruled by Pluto after all, the planet of transformations and shifts in power. Once you start to loosen your grip and become less defensive as a result, you are actually at your best as you are fulfilling your Plutonian purpose of destruction of the self and completely rebuilding a new self from the ashes.

Sagittarius mars: You need to work on your crass indifference to others’ emotions like your sister sign except here this is more impulsive and self-serving. Your bluntness means people can rely on you for your honest opinion, but you use it like a dagger when provoked. You get over it fairly quickly, but you can’t expect others to do so too. You have to be respectful of others’ approach to things - you’re not as accepting as you think you are - and the time it takes for them to heal, don’t expect forgiveness for your (often insincere) apologies, it only makes you look more entitled. You must learn to commit to your projects and not move on to the next interesting thing that catches your eye. You might have an unrivalled enthusiasm for worldly experiences and education, but you lack the perseverance and steadiness required for this. You need to learn to persist even when you feel that your interest is starting to fade. Like Aquarius, you need to practice what you preach if you expect anyone to adopt your views.

Capricorn mars: You must learn when to let go and be inflexible. You pride yourself on self-control, but you hold back from indulging in the merits you get as a reward for your ambition and work ethic. So what’s the point? Do you only do it for pride? Is that the only way you feel important? You must learn to let go and live a little. Stop being so rigid about everything; your need for control and order can be stifling to others. You call yourself a long term planner but where do you see yourself going if you constantly overwork yourself without allowing yourself to enjoy the rewards? You also need to humble yourself down. You may be practical and down to earth, but a confident certainty in your own abilities and knowledge can sometimes manifest as arrogance. You have a God complex that needs to be addressed in your journey to personal growth… You’re so sure that you’re right that you rarely stop and think and consider the other person’s viewpoint without pressure. You’re so concerned with what’s efficient and practical that you always stick to what you know, losing the very objective and logical nature you like to pride yourself on… You must learn to adapt to occasions where things don’t bend your way, where you turn out to be wrong or where you have to experiment with new methods - you have to learn to do all this without resorting to the very level of pettiness you consider yourself above. Rise above this tendency to do whatever to win the argument/ have the last word, it’s childish no matter how you masquerade it. Also be wary of a tendency to step on others to reach the places you want out of a hunger for power… If you want it bad enough you can get there through your own work ethic.

Aquarius mars: You must learn to stop being so inflexible in your views and opinions. You rarely resort to emotional manipulation or rage when angry, not out of respect for others but out of a HUGE superiority complex. You think you’re ‘above’ that like Capricorn Mars but instead of being hypocritical by ending up resorting to the very pettiness you think you’re above, you simply cut the person off and disappear from their life if your values were incompatible and you couldn’t convert them to your side. Ironic considering the tolerance and open-mindedness you constantly preach to others. Learn to humble yourself down and stop thinking your opinions are always right or that you know more than others. Like your sister sign leo, you need to learn to accept that others may know more than you/may be right. Just because you disagree with someone on something doesn’t mean they can’t be in your life.

Pisces mars: Toughen the fuck up and grow a backbone. You need to stop letting people walk all over you and pretend it’s for ~selfless~ reasons when really you do it because you loooove wallowing in self pity. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and relying on escapism. Snap out of it. You MUST be proactive and combat the disillusion that comes with a neptunian Mars. Stop relying on external sources to deal with difficult situations. Face it head on for once. You’ll be relieved. You’ll get through it sooner if you do. Do everything you can to stay in touch with reality. Distract yourself with lists or mentally/physically demanding activities. Don’t let yourself slip away. Stick to plans for once. Focus inward on your emotions to find the root/cause behind certain emotions. You MUST learn to set boundaries. Once you start focusing on yourself and set hard limits instead of excusing others’ actions, asserting yourself will be much easier.



*This is based on the archetypes and basic traits of the zodiac signs. Maintain an objective approach when reading these.. if a description seems off, remember to look holistically at your whole chart. Obviously I don’t know you personally, but astrology is inherently neutral even if my interpretation isn’t and just because YOU don’t express a certain trait does not mean it is not a trait of said sign. So don’t bother with the “not all ___” rants lmao save your energy.

**Astrology is not deterministic, nothing is set in stone just because you have a certain placement - don’t try to justify detrimental behaviours using this excuse e.g. ‘i have a Scorpio Mars and Moon so I can’t help but rely on manipulative tendencies :/’ which is laughable because 1) it’s a shitty excuse 2) it just reinforces underdeveloped traits that discourage any personal growth. You have some degree of control over your behaviours, use that to your advantage.

***I excluded Sun & the outer planet sign placements from this particular post as the description would be too generic and generalised due to the nature of the post. They will be added on the Aspects version of this post as aspects are more personalised and relevant when it comes to the Sun and outer planets.

for more posts like this please follow @jupiteronic

hello and welcome to my first studyblr post!! i’ve seen a ton of these around, but not many have all the tips i’ve learned throughout high school. i go to a private preparatory school and i’m top 5 in my class and i lead many extracurriculars. last year was the CRAZIEST year of my life, but with a certain mindset & only a few all nighters, i managed all A’s in all advanced courses. So, here are the tips i’ve learned!!

  • write stuff down!!!! i know it is the most obvious thing, but writing down anything you need to remember, whether that be homework, tests, quizzes, events, due dates, reminders…anything! checking off these things at night is so satisfying and you won’t forget anything important. when i’m in the #zone, my mind often thinks of stupid questions/thoughts. I’ll jot these questions/misc. thoughts unrelated to what i’m focusing on to come back to later and explore!! (for example, i was doing an frq for econ and i thought of doing this post, so i wrote it down in my journal.)
  • organization. there are so many masterposts out there to help you with organization. my method included binders & comp. notebooks.. that’s about it! i’m not very organized
  • get to know teachers. this is probably what helped a lot my junior year. not only is maintaining good relationships with teachers good for you, it can be beneficial to your grade as well. when you make friends with teachers you always have someone to talk/rant to & they always give you the inside gossip about teachers/other students. have coffee/lunch w them, or talk about theories from the class they teach. they give you a lot of perspectives on the course and cool ideas!
  • manage your time. again, another broad statement. but what i did every night kept me sane. my schedule every day after classes (including saturday) was: 
    • practice until 5 
    • extracurriculars until dinner (6:30-7) 
    • minimal homework until done (usually 1-2 hours)
    • study for 1+ hours if needed (8-9 pm)
    • enjoyment time (at least 30 min)

while this may not be a lot for most people, it was a lot for me and i needed time to make myself happy. school and friends make me happy, but so does alone time. putting this minimum of 30 min a day (if i don’t fall asleep before that) really helped me get through demanding courses because i had an incentive. this schedule also helped me avoid procrastination!! ALSO, I prioritized like hell. Honestly, if homework was a completion grade, I wouldn’t try at all unless i needed the practice. Same goes with classes. the ones i had high A’s in, i would sometimes sacrifice a homework grade in order to get enough sleep or study for another test. while this is not the most ethical way of doing it, it helped.

  • Avoid procrastination. procrastination is your worst enemy. I used to be so bad, but now i’m getting better. this is key. in order to beat procrastination, you have to have self discipline. simple as that. get inspired. for many of you, it’s your studyblr community, for me it was for personal pride and competition. you must execute to get the job done. it will be worth it in the end.
  • do the little things. put away the phone. put music on if it helps. stretch a little. get some water. get as content and comfortable as you can when you study.
  • SLEEP!!!! that’s all i can say. sleep sleep sleep. it’s important. i know life is busy, but make time for sleep if you can. mental illness is a bitch, and sometimes it can make falling asleep hard. i know. just try your best & that’s enough. anytime i had free time during the day, i slept. nothing is more important than sleep, and if i didn’t get at least 8 hours of sleep the night before, i tried to catch up as best as i could. your brain needs a break to refuel and you will feel refreshed the next day. 
  • Eating healthy. i rarely see this tip around (maybe i’m not searching hard enough) but i think it’s important. eating healthy is excellent for your brain function & body function. it’s hard, especially in college, to have to motivation (or money) to make your own dinner, lunch & breakfast everyday. but. it’s. worth. it. i can’t stress this enough. i feel more awake and energized at school and workouts and your body has to have these nutrients to keep functioning well. 
  • Exercise. gross i know, please don’t hurt me, but exercise goes right with eating healthy. the better you feel about yourself, the better you will do in school. simple enough. you will have more motivation, energy, and happiness with a good diet and exercise. running daily and occasionally swimming gets me though the week, and while sometimes i don’t want to workout, i always feel good in the end. find something you like doing and stick to it. try to work out 3 times a week. after every workout, i am always motivated to study
  • UNDERSTAND THE MATERIAL. it’s so obvious, but so many people just memorize. while you have to memorize any new thing you learn in the beginning, there is a time when you must apply what you memorized. you must actually think about why this term/concept is what it is based on memorized facts. you must see the whole picture and how little things relate and why they do. last year i realized this and it worked wonders. for me, if i understood the big picture, i knew the facts by heart. it dawned on me that you must train the mind to think. when going through notes, quizzes, tests, and studying i always asked myself why is this important and what it relates to. retention. is. key. understanding, and not memorizing facts will help so so much!!
  • STUDY BUDDIES. i can’t stress enough how much this helped me. coming from a boarding school, it’s easy to work on homework with friends all the time. to review for a test, my friends in the class would all meet and discuss the material. i’m an auditory learner, so this worked 10x better. what i’ve learned is that if you can teach it, you know it. when i could explain concepts to my friends, i knew i didn’t have to study that. if questions came up when i was trying to discuss my line of thinking, i revisited my notes and tried to understand why i didn’t get it. if we had study guides, we would all do the question and discuss why we got our answers after. for me, discussion is the best way to get new perspectives and ideas as well as understanding the topic better. (i also love talking so).
  • ask questions. even if its stupid. even if you’re just curious. always ask them. 
  • study environment. outside (if it wasn’t terrible weather) is where i love to study with friends. if it is snowing or raining, i go to the library or a local coffee shop. it really just depends on my mood. find an area where you feel the most productive!
7 Things INFPs Should Stop Doing if They Want to be Successful

A lot of things determine how successful you’ll be: the career you choose to pursue; the company you keep; the things you love doing; whether you possess a burning desire to prove other people wrong. There’s no one-size-fits-all prescription. This is good, because we all define success in different ways.

For idealistic INFPs, success often means having the freedom to live a moral, beautiful, and virtuous life. Success in the conventional sense (power, prestige, money) doesn’t matter as much as pursuing your passions, expressing yourself creatively, and growing without restraint.

Unfortunately for INFPs, these idealist qualities can be difficult to manage in the real world. The career fields you are naturally suited for (the arts, counseling, education) aren’t always respected, and others may not understand the “higher goals” you seek to achieve. In work and in life, you are acutely aware that others are judging you against standards that clash with your value system, which cheapens the experience for you. Even if you are objectively successful, you might not feel it because success, for an INFP, feels like an all-or-nothing event. You are notoriously hard on yourself for not always living up to the standards you promote.

So how can INFPs feel successful and satisfied with their careers and lives? The answer lies in doing less, not more. Here are seven recommendations which could help you lead an authentically successful life, whatever your goals.

1: Stop living according to the expectations of other people

If you want to shape and live your own successful life, you will always end up disappointing someone. Parents, partners, bosses, colleagues, friends - at some point, they will all tell you to knuckle down, get a secure job, go for the promotion, or go for some other outcome that doesn’t feel right to you. Trying to meet other people’s expectations is a sure-fire way to get drained, disconnected, and lost in the crowd. INFPs experience success by focusing on their own ideals, not by becoming something they’re not.

It’s horrible to disappoint others, especially if you are wary of conflict. But remember, it is simply not in your nature to conform. You will always be much happier being true to yourself. Dare to stop living according to other people’s expectations and start living it your way instead.

2: Stop going wide (go deep)

Being successful in life has a lot to do with clarifying what really matters to you and giving those priorities the time they deserve. You have to focus, otherwise there’s a risk you will get distracted by multiple endeavors. INFPs in particular have a tendency towards the dilettante, always trying new things and getting restless easily.

While it’s great to leave the door open to new possibilities, it’s equally important to narrow the focus onto the one or two areas that you really care about. Successful people don’t experience specializing as a restriction, but as a permission to go into the depths of a goal. Whether you have a business idea, an interesting hobby, or a potential relationship that you’d like to nurture, if you are completely dedicated to it, you stand a better chance of being successful than if your attention is scattered over several playing fields.

3: Stop waiting for the perfect moment

Waiting around for the perfect timing to go after your goals is counterproductive and hostile to your success. That’s because holding out for a stars-aligning “perfect moment” is a type of procrastination; it’s a stall. As Neil Gaiman once said, “If you only write when you’re inspired you may be a fairly decent poet, but you’ll never be a novelist because you’re going to have to make your word count today and those words aren’t going to wait for you whether you’re inspired or not.” That piece of advice applies to anything. A bad job won’t get better just because you wait around for a new boss to take over. A bad relationship won’t turn into a great relationship just because you tolerate your partner’s inadequacies, giving the relationship more effort than it possibly deserves.

Procrastination is an untamed beast that rages wildly in INFPs, but the fact is, you’re going to have to work for your success. Why wait to start that journey? For tips and insights on dealing with procrastination, check out the Ted Talk from master procrastinator Tim Urban.

4: Stop believing in miracles

Believing in fate or miracles is really the desire to sweeten one of life’s bitterest lessons: that if we want something to happen, we’re going to wake up every day with purpose and make it happen. Success overnight is a myth. It involves a lot of hard work and effort.

Rare talent and extreme giftedness does not spare you from this unpalatable truth. Even Mozart went through years of rigorous, tedious practice before he became a master musician. If you want to be successful, you’re going to have to take the game of success seriously. You’ll have to go all-in at 100 percent.

5: Stop trying to control so much

Some things in your life you can control. Most of it, you can’t. That’s a difficult message for an idealist INFP to handle, since you feel compelled to make the world a better place. There’s a tendency to believe that you raise other people to your own high standards or control certain situations that simply cannot be influenced. And the frustrating thing is, you feel safe when you are in control and utterly exhausted when you are not. That sets you up for disappointment, because control does not really exist, except perhaps in the mind.

If, like many INFPs, you have a tendency to behave like a backseat driver, you probably need to work on balancing your high ideals with the realities of everyday life. You can certainly control your own independent destiny, but you can’t control people or the minutiae of situations for your own sense of safety and worth. Without resolving this conflict, you will never feel happy or successful, and you may become paralyzed and confused about what to do with your life.

6: Stop giving all your time to people who will not take you further

Motivational speaker Jim Rohn famously said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. No matter how much you try to live life your own way, sooner or later, the people with whom you spend most of the time contribute to what you become.

For idealistic and value-driven INFPs, this presents a major problem. You tend to choose your friends carefully, looking for people whose values are very similar to your own. Like-minded people can certainly offer wise counsel and make you feel safe, but can you learn from people who share your views, opinions, and values? Will these people challenge your decisions or push you out of your comfort zone?

What you really need, is a connection with people with different perspectives whose ideas rub up against your own. These people can pressure-test your choices and nudge you off the path of least resistance towards a place where you where you can learn, grow and make a bigger difference.

7: Stop mistrusting your instinct

As an INFP, you instinctively know when something you’re doing feels wrong. You may not know why something is off in your life, but you definitely know that it is. This level of self-awareness is the reason why you learn so quickly, and why you are so open-minded and flexible in all aspects of your life. It’s also the reason why you feel so out of place when ploughing a path that wasn’t made for you.

The only thing that separates a successful INFP from a less-successful INFP, is that the first person figured out when she was flogging a dead horse and trusted her gut instincts enough to try something else - even if the change seemed unfamiliar and crazy. When INFPs take action, they know immediately if their instinct was right. Your intuition is a strength that can often lead to better consequences, so give it the respect it deserves.

Final Thoughts

If your life isn’t as successful as you’d like it to be right now, there’s always an alternative. You can always choose to do something else. For INFPs, that usually means living in congruence with your values. Of all the types, you have the strongest need to act authentically and will never be happy unless you are true to yourself.

Of course, there’s always the possibility that your options are discouraging - at certain points, we all face moving from one set of problems to a different set of problems, none of which are particularly exhilarating. But the fact remains, you have a choice. If you stop believing that you have a choice, you automatically become a victim and feel helpless. INFPs in particular have to be careful that their idealism does not turn against them. If it does, you will never achieve goals or make changes for fear that you will never find the “perfect” career, lifestyle, creative endeavor, or person.

Ultimately, success for INFPs depends on you finding ways to honor your deeply held values while managing the constraints of everyday life. Accepting that life is full of shortcomings and compromises is difficult when you hold such lofty ideals, but it will help you to feel more effective and fulfilled. You have plenty of success qualities - self-awareness, intuition, empathy, adaptability, curiosity, open-mindedness - how you choose to apply them, is up to you.

How to become a good student (again) 3: Yearn for friendship - not worship; not debasement

Hello, fellow ex-good student!

‘tis done! This beast just got longer and longer, so I decided to cut it down a bit for the sake of readability. But let me know if there’s something that was too vague - the nuance might have got lost in the editing process.

Alright, let’s get down to business (to defeat! The Huns!)! So, if you’re an ex-good student, I’m pretty sure that you know this static in your head, right? Whenever you really need to do something but you just can’t get up and do it, so you keep procrastinating even though you hate it and keep scrolling and scrolling or gaming and gaming and feel more and more guilty?

Well, it might not be the most immediate analogy, but for this post I want you to consider that what connects you and your subject of study is essentially a relationship and that this static is (among other things) an indicator of how screwed up your relationship is. Just like with real people, your relationships with subjects can either

  • prosper and bear fruit (me & Creative Writing)
  • become cold and distant (me & French)
  • or, worst of all, turn sour and actively harmful. (me & PE, back in school)

Now, nobody likes to hear that they’re relationship-ing wrong. And it is true that different approaches work for different people. But here are the counter-productive relationships that I’ve personally ended up in and I’m gonna show you how I got into and out of them, so you can try to do the same. Maybe it’ll help you lift that static from your head.

Side-Note: Always remember that, since your subjects are just that (subjects), and not real people, you are the only one who can actually mend these relationships and, conversely, you are the one who screwed them up in the first place (probably with good intentions, though).

So, we’ll take them in this order:

1) Overeager Debasement

2) Undereager Debasement

3) Worship


(Oh, and in case you wanna catch up:

Masterpost 

Part 1

Part 2)


1) Overeager Debasement

What is it?

The desire to do everything, perfectly, at the same time, right now. Not to limit yourself to just one field of study, but to master them all, to reign supreme above knowledge, to keep your mind wide open to new possibilities, similarities and contradictions.
You overvalue your own capacities and undervalue the needs and difficulties of your subject.
(also refer to the first post for this)

How did you get here?

(read picture from right to left)

So. Many. Possible. Reasons.

  • it’s a cage. The idea of doing just one thing for the rest of your life scares you and you feel imprisoned at the thought of it
  • you know that you could be outstanding if you applied yourself
  • you know that you could be even more outstanding if you became accomplished in multiple fields
  • you want to find connections between fields nobody’s ever considered before
  • you feel like you’ve wasted your last few years and need to catch up to others
  • you’re afraid that you’re not good enough
  • you’re afraid of being ignorant
  • you’re arrogant

No matter the reason (I’ve gone through them all), people caught in this state of mind shovel more and more onto their plate.
And then wonder why they can’t swallow it all.

What do you think you’re doing?

A labour of love, most likely. You think you love languages and sciences and athletics and programming and cooking and hanging out with friends and being alone and so you just want to do it all!
You don’t want to limit yourself! You don’t want to lose any time! But there’s just so much and you have so little energy and ugh, if only I wasn’t destined for greatness, then I could relax like other little people, but no, I need to keep pushing! In every! Direction! At the same! Time!

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend who gets up at 6am, watches the sun rise, does yoga, eats a healthy breakfast, goes for a quick run, comes back home, answers all correspondence, is artistic for a few hours, then scientific for a few hours, then social for a few hours and ends the day with tiny masterpieces in each area, goes out with friends or family to grab a healthy dinner and goes to sleep, happy and balanced :)

Well, you know what, my starry-eyed friend?

What are you actually doing?

You’re the mental equivalent of a social butterfly.
You’re being fucking disrespectful.

You’re always on the run and never able to really commit to anything, because you’ve already scheduled something else afterwards. You’re shallow, deluded, that one friend that always comes in running, screaming “Besties  ~ ♥” and everyone shifts uncomfortably in their seats and smiles a painful smile and humours you, because they know you mean well, but they also know that you know nothing about them. 
You’ve never been there for them ever, but always expect them to be there for you. Whenever they want to talk about themselves, you nod and then proceed to about yourself and your plans and “ohmygosh, this is so nice, we need to meet more often ~ ♥ “. But at least you mean well, so they’ve agreed to keep it simple and on the “The weather is nice today”-level with you. 

But here you are, wondering why you’re not making any progress.
Mysterious.

So what do I do?

Well, you need to go from this:

To this:

How? More on that below.


2) Undereager Debasement

What is it?

This stage is what happens when you notice that your lofty ideals from Overeager Debasement cannot be fulfilled. You turn bitter, hateful, cold. You think you’re a failure, you think you were too soft. Instead of wanting to be friends with everyone, you now want to rule over everyone, fuck what they want.

You’re burnt out. You’re done. You just want to get through these stupid classes and catch a goddamn break, goddamnit.

And you WILL get through. You’re too proud to do anything else. But you don’t really care about any of it.
You just want to make it.

How did you get here?

If you were a good student, you probably heard at some point or another that you were “different” and that your complex and mysterious ways were not understandable and definitely not achievable for your average classmate.

Most people who tell you this mean well. A few want to make fun of you, but most actually do mean it as a compliment. But they don’t know how dangerous it is to hear it again and again, because regardless of whether it’s true or not, you start to believe it.
You start to believe that somehow, you have a higher calling, a higher standard. And you start to long for that day when your high standards will be met - when you will go to that one mysterious class where everyone is just as eager as you are, where the “Oh, captain, my captain!”-teacher will spark a fire in your brain that will never go out and when your ominous “gifts” can finally be put to good use for the prosperous future of mankind.


And you work.

And work.

And the class never comes.

You feel the weight on your shoulders when teachers talk of “high expectations”, you feel it crush you a little bit every time your friends tease you about your genuine fear that you might not get an A, that you might lose it all, that your “gifts” could disappear and you’ll be stranded and useless and you put in the hours, you work your ass off to keep that high standard, all in the hope of having that one miraculous class that never comes.

I realized that that class would never come when I entered university.

University, I’d told myself, would be my Arcadia, my Eden, my academic paradise where all my hard work would be rewarded!
Instead, I only found more drudgery, more incompetent professors, more disinterested students and even more bureacracy. To say that I was “disappointed” would be putting it very lightly.

I became disoriented and disenchanted. I realized that I could get through most classes with half-assed effort, I was hardly ever challenged, I floated along and hated every second of it. I blamed my boring teachers, the imperfect system, the teachers who had given me hope only for me to watch it crash and go up in flames.

What do you think you’re doing?

Being badass, cool and detached, most likely.

You dream of yourself as a master and your subjects as slaves. They bow to your will, they dance to your tune, you command them with the snap of a finger.

“Look, you slave of the system”, you say, lying on a velvet sofa, “Look, at how it hardly takes any effort for me to pass these classes! Look at how I spend my time doing things I actually like and that are actually worth it, unlike these stupidly easy classes taught by stupidly incompetent professors in a stupidly screwed-up system! Look at me, being edgy and drowning in self-hatred because I can physically feel myself gliding off the rails that made me so “special” and becoming one of the average people in the masses, haha. Ha. Ha. Screw academia, but still give me good grades, amirite?”

I know your delusion. I’ve been there. You imagine yourself to be that one perfect friend that never studies for classes, comes for three lectures per semester and still manages to get perfect grades because everything you do in school is, like, so five years ago. That one friend who has read all the classics in their spare time, has conquered and enslaved all the knowledge actually worth knowing, will quote obscure Polish philosophers you’ve never heard of and plays the piano with a perfect pitch. They’re the wisest, most culture-non-conforming people you know - they’ve been up until 5am, wandering the streets and drinking vodka from a bottle while forcefully pentrating the mysteries of the universe all by themselves until they finally fall asleep on a park bench and awake with an epiphany about Klein bottles.
They’re “special”.

What are you actually doing?

Caring more about appearing “special” than actually trying to be “special”, that’s what you’re doing.

But, look, what made you so “special” and “different” in the first place was not a “calling” or “gifts” or the fact that you wrote good grades and were destined for greatness.

Here’s a handy chart I’ll use later - you were lucky enough to fall into the green zone, lucky enough to be born with an innate respect and a love for learning. That’s what made you “special”. That’s what made you succeed. Not pressure, not warped ideals and certainly not the fear of failure.


But somewhere along the way you forgot that and only focussed on the results. You started to believe yourself to be so special that everybody else should cater to you.
The fancy titles, the awe-struck looks, the “You’re so amazing”s and the “The genius of a decade”, the planned Nobel prize speech and the prestige, the dream others had lovingly created for you and you had slowly absorbed and warped as your own? It got to you. Hell, it got to me.
And it became more important than learning itself.
Somewhere along the way, you and I, we became an arrogant and lazy assholes.

You looked down on your easy courses and homework and instead of recognising how lucky you are, doing it in a minute and a half and then putting in the extra work on top to dig deeper and to maybe contribute something of value and fun, you threw it aside with a snide remark as beneath you.
Of course it wasn’t fun. Of course it wasn’t challenging. You never even tried to make it either.

(And don’t get me wrong: I honestly do think that the education system as it is right now needs MAJOR reforms. But right now? It is what it is. And instead of making the best of it and doing what you once loved so much, you succumbed to societal pressures you found yourself unable to fulfill and said “meh”.
You cared so much about the fame and the title that the relationship itself didn’t matter.)

But this isn’t the master-slave relationship you imagine it to be.
It’s a trophy-friendship. Once upon a time, you got on really well with this person and other people loved your friendship. You fell in love with the ideal, with their connections, their money, their prestige, their name on a CV, and you stuck around just for that.
You valiantly ignore the reality of the state of things between you two
and take them out only when absolutely needed, only when things are this close to falling apart and so you keep walking a fine, fine line.
Whenever a deadline approaches, you shower them with attention and love and, gingerly, they open up to you and you see a depth and complexity to them that astounds you and makes you think “Imagine! Imagine how much more I could have seen if only I’d started earlier?”
But the moment the crisis has passed, you toss them aside once again.

Because this is enough to make your name.
You may not remember much about these nights or about the person at all, but the only thing that counts is that it will fulfill your “special” prophecy and make you a legend, right?

Well, always remember this:
(read picture from right to left)

You’re not “special” if you made it to university. You’re not “special” if you’ve made your name. 
It comes down to a simple choice: do you value appearances over integrity or the other way round? Do you dare to look like a fumbling idiot again when you start something new? Is the “appearing like an idiot”-part more important to you than the “learning/creating something new”-part? 
Have a think about it.

3) Worship

“Alright”, you’ll say, “Alright. I get it. So I’ll treat my “friends”/subjects with respect and integrity and I’ll take all the time and concentration I can bestow upon them, just as I would upon real friends. But do you want me to be like, uh - like…

What is it?

“…like one of those anime characters that lives only for their dream and gets up at like 6am, does the thing, talks about the thing, breathes the thing, goes to bed, dreams of the thing and then wakes up at 6am to do the thing?”

(Google: Did you mean Hinata Shouyou?

Yes, yes, I did, google.)

Well, no, I don’t want you to do that. See, that’s the other extreme and unless you’re an anime character, chances are that it won’t work out for you. 

How did you get here?

Personally, I was caught in this trap for a loooooong time. Anime offered me a new way of relating to my passions that neither my family nor my school had ever shown me: unabashed obsession.
I wanted to be perfect. I wanted to be obsessed. I wanted to give myself up to a higher ideal, something above human consciousness, something that would endure. I wanted to, well, get up at 6am, do the thing, talk about the thing, breathe the thing and so on - “the thing” in question being, of course, studying. I made elaborate plans, complicated lists, study-plans that shift on a daily basis and cover all grounds, I wanted to study for two hours before school, wanted to repeat lessons, wanted to give myself up to knowledge, made cool covers for my notebooks, made mock exams for my friends to use, planned to focus on each continent for a month and study it, planned to listen to one new composer each day, planned to go to the museum every week, planned to analyze Sherlock Holmes and think just like him, planned to - you get the idea.

I wanted to be like this:

What do you think you’re doing?

Being but a humble servant to the eternal workings of truth. Knowing thou art unworthy, yet suffering the perfection of study.

I wanted to go from 0 to 100, I wanted knowledge and wisdom to transform and deliver me, I wanted to feel enlightened, I wanted to feel my brain burning, pushing frontiers and breaking through to new horizons, I wanted to elevate myself to touch even the lowest levels of truth.
I wanted to do something noble, something worthwhile, something that could never be critisized and would always be valued, something with eternal meaning that would echo through the ages and I wanted to be even the tiniest cog in the machinery of mind.

What are you actually doing?

Being, quite simply, an idiot.

This is one of my favourite quotes (David Wong):

“There are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.” 

The same goes for studying. As shown above, studying won’t work out if you do not treat your subjects with respect. Conversely, studying also won’t work if you continue to idolize it as work beyond all work and reproach, as the only true calling, as the realm of the genii and by self-flagellating yourself and repeating “I’m but a humble servant in your kingdom of reason and will never reach where you are, but will spend all my time trying to reach you.” 

Why? Because by saying “I’ll never reach you or be worthy of you”, you’ve already sealed your fate. Some students (no matter how well they actually perform) are stuck thinking that they are stupid and incapable of doing well. Others think that the trick is in the preparation and they undergo complicated rituals of finding exactly the right study spot, exactly the right study drink, exactly the right study time, etc. in the hope of channeling the connection between their godly subject and themselves, but it never turns out quite as glamorous as they’d hoped (once again, speaking from experience).

This is because you cannot force a true friendship if you think yourself unworthy of it. It will always be worship. 

And why are you worshipping?
Because it takes the pressure right off of you
. This always annoyed me about some of my fellow students. They treated becoming a good student as this miraculous and unlikely event that only happens to the #blessed.
I insisted that “no”, it could be done. “Yes”, it was hard work, but ultimately absolutely doable. But now that I’ve been in their shoes? I understand.
Admitting that you could have done it anytime implies failure on your part for not having done it. By saying “Oh no, it is so very complex and divine and a lowly worm like me could never hope to crawl in its shadows”, you shift the focus away from yourself and onto the thing itself. 

But this is a synthetic, manufactured relationship with a partner that does not even exist. It is, at its heart, a kyaa  ~ I hope senpai notices me! (๑♡⌓♡๑) - kind of relationship. It’s idolizing not a person’s true character, but their appearance, their aesthetic and the values that they represent for you. It’s not really listening to what they’re saying, but warping their words so they fit into your perfect idea of them.
Just, unlike with undereage debasement, you do not play pretend that everything’s fine and secretly hate the other person deep down - you honestly idolize them to heaven and back, so you could never possible reach them.
You’re using them to fill in the holes in your own personality.

And that … just isn’t fun? I dunno about you, but treating studying as something that must be done perfectly with exactly the right pen and the perfect face-mask after the right smoothie and in the right lighting by a window overgrown with ivy and with perfect concentration from the first moment and unwavering, knightly passion and exact planning from 6am to bedtime all because I know deep down that I will not be able to fulfill these ideals and thus don’t have to feel bad about not reaching them just … isn’t for me. I don’t like my relationships to be all overstructured and “perfect” and high maintenance like that.

I want my friendships and my studying to be authentic. And that means that sometimes it’s messy and sometimes it’s hard and sometimes it’s quoting Keats while lying on the floor at 2am in the morning and chugging milk out of a carton, but it’s real.
I truly do understand this longing to make studying look pretty and like a magical realm, because when you’re in the flow that’s really what it feels like. But the beauty comes along with the practice, not the other way round.

No, but honestly - what do I DO then?


Y’remember Hippogriffs from Harry Potter? That’s how I imagine my subjects. Approach them carefully, honestly, maintaining eye contact and as equals and they will respect you. This scene:

This scene is what I’m talking about. 
If you were in a worship-state, you would only admire them from afar, gushing over how beautiful they are, but sad that they would never deign to even look in your general direction. (think of all the subjects you thought would be way too difficult for you)
If you were in a debasement-state, you’d either try to make friends with all the hippogriffs, hopping from one to the other and forming no bond with either or you’d “tsk” disdainfully and try to force them to obey you against their will. (*cough* Malfoy *cough*)

If, however, you’re in the green, there will be mutual respect between you and you will be able to fly.

So what does it mean to be in the green? 
It means not to do any of the above, obviously, so 

  • take your time for and invest brainpower into each and every one of your subjects - be a good friend. Be there. Listen. Even if they have crazy ideas at 4am in the morning. 
  • appreciate your subjects and know that they are more than the teacher who tries to get you to know them. Sometimes, some people just have a really shitty PR department (especially maths)
  • don’t think too much or too little of yourself. You can do amazing things, but that does not give you the license not to do amazing things anymore, rest on your laurels and expect others to applaud you for it. 

  • some relationships take longer than others to build, but getting to understand someone who puzzled you from the first moment and challenged your beliefs will improve your own personality as well
    (side-eye at PE. Yes, I love you now, you crazy athletic bastard)
  • do it for the sake of the relationship itself, because you enjoy their company. Results are presents which, although very much appreciated, should not be the main motivator to keep you going.
    This essentially means that you should think of studying as hanging out with a friend - already makes it seem so much more inviting and way less daunting, does it not?

    (Logic and I, being saltmates. Real friends judge other people together)
  • be aware that all friendships go through rocky patches and some subjects might take a while to warm up to you or you to them. But if you think that it’s worth it, then you gotta power through that. If you don’t think it’s worth it, you gotta be brave enough to say good-bye. 


Look, what I’m actually saying is … be Souma Yukihira from Food Wars.

Food Wars is a crazy and at times pretty pervy manga/anime, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t also one of the best pieces of fiction I’ve ever consumed and if Souma isn’t one of the most admirable main characters I’ve ever encountered.  

The relationship between him and cooking is filled with trust, love and equality. He trusts his cooking skills, because he knows that they have spent a long time together - cooking won’t let him down and he won’t ever let cooking down by stopping to look for ways to improve.

That doesn’t mean, however, that he’s always deadly serious - he loves to play around with cooking and to try ridiculous new things. He never forgets the joy that even the simplest form of cooking brings him. 

There’s one great episode where he puts his life as a chef on the line and someone fearfully asks him what he’d do if he lost. He shrugs and says he could become a lawyer or a teacher or something. So while he loves cooking profoundly, he does not worship it and he knows that there are other relationships he could build up if he had to. He just …doesn’t want to, because cooking is his bff. 

He loves to take on challenges to see how far he and cooking have come -

- and he takes challenges very seriously -


- but takes it even more seriously if he loses -

- and nonetheless knows that they are stronger for the challenges they have faced together. 

So, yes, this is what it means to be in the green. Cherish your friendships, hang out together, be honest, funny, clever, curious and you. 

You’ll be surprised at how much fun the two of you will have, now that all the pretensions and pressures are gone. 

Just …hang out and have fun.

(and maybe watch Food Wars!, because damn, Souma is the MVP of my inspirational heroes)

Have a great day and I’ll see you in the next (and hopefully shorter) part 4 :)

Top Ten Tips for Freshmen

First seen on my Patreon!

Anonymous asked: Hey. I’ve been following your blog for awhile. Super cool and informative! I’m going to be a freshman in college this fall and I’m kinda nervous (like anyone would be) I’m gonna major in Music Ed. Any tips for incoming freshmen???

Congratulations on getting in! Honestly, that’s a great question. Here are my Top Ten Tips for Music Freshmen

1. Schedule in time to practice. Practice is no longer something you can do for twenty minutes when you get home from school. Pianists and violinists probably understand this already, but seriously everyone (singers especially): practice an hour a day, minimum, every weekday of your freshman year. It will help you out in the long run SO MUCH.


I’m a huge advocate for using Google Calendar for EVERYTHING, so just slide that hour of practice in between classes, or wherever it fits. Then stick to it. The difference between someone who buckles down their freshman year and someone who doesn’t tends to compound for the rest of their musical careers.


2. Schedule in time to eat. Okay, this might have been a Me-problem, but I had class straight from 8am to 4pm three days a week my sophomore year, and 8am to 8pm at least one other day that same semester. There was no lunch break in that schedule. My roommate thought I had died a couple times because I had gotten back to the dorm after she’d fallen asleep, and left before she’d woken up. DO NOT BE ME. Leave at LEAST one hour-long break somewhere in the middle of your long days. You’ll still have days that are just as long, but that break will make life so. Much. Nicer.


3. Leave your door open at your dorm, and keep it closed at your practice room. The friends I made my freshman year that I still talk to I met because we lived on the same dorm floor for like three years together. My SO, my best friends, yep, all of them lived on the same floor as me. I met them because I left my door open whenever possible, and so did they, and no one minded if someone came and sat on someone else’s floor. That’s a major method of bonding freshman year - don’t ignore it.


On the flip side, this does NOT HOLD TRUE to practice rooms. If you’re practicing, keep that door shut. If you want to talk to someone in the hallway, sure, stand in the doorway, but Do Not Do the Doot without shutting the door. That’s how you annoy the entire music program.


4. Walk everywhere, as much as you can. My freshman 15 was a negative 15, because I didn’t change how I ate but suddenly I was walking six miles a day. Yes, public transport is great if you live in a really far-flung dorm or something. But if you can buckle down and walk to class, or bike if it’s real far, then you can cut down on any guilt from not being able to hit the gym by at least half.


5. Just because there’s unlimited ice cream does NOT mean you should eat unlimited ice cream. On a similar note: yes, the soft-serve is great. Do NOT fill a salad bowl with soft-serve. Just don’t. It ends badly. Coffee poured into a mug half-filled with soft-serve? A much better idea, in moderation.


6. The friends you make in your first week will probably not be the friends you have at graduation. I still talk to my freshman group, but that’s because we were all remarkably level-headed people who didn’t really do the massive personality change some students go through their freshman year. I’ve seen way more groups, however, that cling together the first two weeks of school, and then try to force friendship for the rest of the year, regardless of actual compatibility. Just let it go, and be friends with the people you actually get along with. Join clubs and intramurals, if you need to.


P.S. Dating your freshman year is not worth it!!! Don’t do it!!!


7. Even if you don’t like your fellow music majors, be polite and courteous to them anyway. There’s always one or two people in your music program that you will not be able to stand. That’s fine. Do your best to avoid being in classes or ensembles with them. What you cannot do is: be cruel, talk behind their back, or otherwise be a rude and gross person to them. A.) That’s just mean, and you’re not a high school student anymore, rise above the pettiness. B.) The people you meet in college will be an amazing network for the rest of your life. Even if you don’t think that the person you dislike is a potential connection that will help you later, the people who hear you gossip or be cruel could be, and they will remember it. Always be kind.


8. Stick to the middle of the bell curve when it comes to talking in class. Don’t be the person talking almost as much as the professor, either to answer questions, interrupt, or whisper to your friends. And please don’t be That Guy, the one who thinks they know EVERYTHING and purposefully asks obscure questions to seem smart. On the other hand, you should try to answer some questions. Feel out the atmosphere of your program, and adjust your talking based on that.


9. MUSIC MAJORS CAN’T SKIP CLASS. Too many college advice things tell incoming freshmen that yeah, you can totally skip class every week or so, it won’t affect your grade, blah de yada blah. I don’t know if this applies to other majors (probably not any rigorous ones), but it certainly does NOT apply to music majors. You go to every class you can drag yourself to. If you have a major flu or something, email your professor and get the material. However, unless you are nigh unto Living Death, go to class. I learn really well on my own, and any time I missed a class I came back and immediately felt lost. DON’T SKIP CLASS.


10. It’s okay to switch majors - both within music and to something else. Music is a hard major to enter, but once you’re in it, it’s easy to shift your focus or leave. Tons of people enter as Performance majors, and leave as Ed., or vice versa, or switch Composition or Tech instead. Plenty of others drop music down to a minor and get business majors or something else completely different. All of that is okay.


The current requirement that kids who have been told to sit down, shut up, and listen for 12 years being expected to know exactly what their career path should be upon being handed a piece of paper at 18 is DUMB. So follow your passion. If your passion changes, that’s okay - just keep going. You’ve got this.

anonymous asked:

Could you do a got7 reaction like the BTS reaction of you refusing sex?

Of course, Lets start with a little back story.


There was something comforting about going rehearsals with him, a sense of comfort in knowing that those he works with know you exist and that you belong to him, just like he belongs to you. But this was the first time he had asked you to go with him to a live show to watch. Usually, he liked to keep his business life and personal life as far away from one another as possible, not because he was ashamed, but just because he wanted to save you from all the pressure media put on idols who are dating.

You were so excited to go with him, and he was so excited to have you there, to show you exactly what its like for him. You spent all morning stuck to one another, his hand never leaving its secure place on your hip. Even when the other members excitedly bounced over to say hello and give you a sweet hug he was still there, making sure to pull you back. The two of you would laugh as he was put into wardrobe for the show, nd he would blush when you told him how good he looked. There was even a moment where he when he walked over to you, half way through going over what would be done and talked about during the show, just to plant a deep kiss on your lips because ‘you just look so cute.’

You sat by him during hair and make up, you knew these girls didnt like you. You were honestly expecting them not to. The thought of them with their hands all over the hair your tug at when hes pleasuring you and the lips you kiss when your feeling down sent a wave of jealousy through your stomach. It didnt matter though, you knew that, for the entire time he sat there his hand was on your knee, and his eye kept opening so he could look at you.

It was when he was getting the final touches on his make up done that your silly jealousy took a pang. The make up girl told him to look at her, which fine, she needs to make sure everything is even. But when she tilted his chin up with the tip of her pinky and blushed you wouldn’t help the feeling in your stomach.

‘Ive always thought you have the prettiest smile.’ She said stroking a brush along his bottom lip gently, making him smile.

‘Good, I always thought I was the best looking one out of this group.’ He joked. You would have laughed, but his hand left your knee and folded with his own in his lap. The artist looked at you, a smug look in her eyes that made the back of your neck tingle.

‘That feels really good.’ His voice brought you back to look at him. His comment was far from appropriate so why he decided to say it floored you.

‘Of course it does! I know how much you like this part.’ She said making him smile again.

You watched as she continued to apply the numeral pink to his lips. She could have stopped four seconds ago and it would have been perfect, but she had to keep going until their was a light shine on his bottom lip.

‘Whoops, too shiny let me fix that.’ She said bending closer to his mouth. She puckered her lips and blew gently, as if that was going to solve the problem.

You looked forward as she smiled triumphantly, the noise he had made making the smug look in her eyes grow darker. Crossing your arms you turned to face the mirror in front of you and you couldn’t help but catch the eye of another member who had witnessed the whole thing. Seeing that you stood and left the dressing room, not caring that your boyfriend was calling after you.

Not having any way to get home you just took your seat and waited. You tried to smile and laugh when they finally made their way onto the stage but there was no hiding the fact that you were hurt. If he was doing that around you what was he doing when you weren’t? Thinking only made you madder and seeing him staring at you with worried eyes only made you fuming.

In the car afterwards you tried not to sit next to him but he made people shift so he could. He tried to place his hand on you knee but you moved away. He tried to kiss you cheek but you pushed his chest. All you wanted to do was cry.

Getting back to your shared apartment you ignored him, even though he was talking like nothing was wrong. He wold have finally stopped when you walked into the bathroom and slammed the door, taking your clothes of angrily before stepping into the hot shower you had started for yourself…

Jaebum:

You slamming the door would make his mind race. What had happened that you were now slamming doors? When you got out of the shower he watched you B-line it into your shared room. The sight of your bare back with pearls of water still holding to your skin made him smile, he loved your back. He’d stand and make his way over to you, licking his lips in the process before he was right behind you. You knew he was there but you had nothing to say to him, so ignoring him was your best option. That was until you felt his lips start on your shoulder and move up your neck. You stepped forward, continuing to ignore him as you reached for a set of comfy clothes. ‘Baby.’ he’d say wrapping his arms around your shoulders to try again. The thought of his lips made you sick, so you pushed him off of you. ‘Leave me alone.’ you said taking the clothes and heading back towards the bathroom. ‘Jagi, whats wrong?’ He’d say, his voice giving away the concern that erupted though his stomach. ‘I said leave me alone.’ You spat. You were just about to slam the door again when he caught it and followed you into the bathroom. ‘Tell me what is wrong.’ He said with stern eyes as you angrily pulled the shirt you grabbed over your head, scoffing when you realized it was his. ‘That shit that you pulled? That was embarrassing. How dare you let shit like that happen especially when I’m sitting right there next to you.’ You said, tears welling in your eyes.

‘Y/n, what are you talking about!’ He said trying to reach out for you again only to have you pull away. ‘Really? Are you that stupid that you didnt even realize that whats her face was all over you! Blowing on your fucking mouth, are you kidding me!’ You said, your loud voice now echoing off of the walls. ‘She was practically rubbing it in my face.’ You added, this time a bit quieter. He rubbed the back of his neck before rubbing his face and trying to pull you in one more time. This time you let him, you hated it when he looked upset. ‘Im so sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking.’ He said wrapping his arms around you tightly. ‘I can’t handle that kind of things. And if thats happening when I’m sitting right next to you? What happening when I’m not.’ You said, tears now falling.

‘Im so sorry. Nothing. Nothing is happening. Please, Jagi.’

He was your sense of comfort so as you cried you couldn’t help your hands that had wondered up to hold on to his back. Seeing how upset this had made you ruined him, he never wanted to see you cry and the fact that he was the one who made you broke his heart. He’d hold onto you as long as he needed too and although he knew you handnt fully forgave him, it wouldn’t stop him from making it very known that the behavior that had happened was uncalled for and would never happen again.

Mark:

Mark would never do anything he thought would hurt you in any way. All he wanted was to be the best version of himself just for you. So when you started acting cold towards him his mind would race. He wouldn’t be able to focus during the show, talking less then he already did and when questions were sent his way he was having trouble answering them. When you stormed into the bathroom he figured maybe you just forgot to but deodorant on? He knew how weird you got when you thought you smelt so He’d leave you be, settling himself on the couch and turning the tv on. When you walked out with wet messy hair and in your pajamas he figured you were just tired, but he knew you were never to tired for him. He’d try anything to make you feel good. He stood, corning you in the kitchen before dipping his head down in attempt to kiss you. When you turned your head so he caught cheek his eyebrows would push together, you never turned down a kiss from him. He’d catch your chin and make you look at him, trying to bring his lips to yours again only to have you push his chest hard do he stumbled back away from you. ‘Don’t touch me.’ You said shooting daggers at him before picking up the drink you had poured and walking past him. You only made it half way to your bedroom before his hand caught your elbow. He spun you causing the drink to spill slightly and you to cuss. ‘What part of don’t touch me did you not understand!’ You yelled, trying to fight the lurch you heart gave when his eyes turned from confused to hurt.

‘What wrong?’ He’d ask in a small voice.

‘Whats wrong? Whats wrong is that my boyfriend Someone who is supposed to love me drops me in the blink of an eye when someone else is flirting with them. And the best part? He doesn’t even try to stop it.’ You yelled, pointing a finger at him so he knew exactly who you were talking about. His shoulders would slump and he’d take his bottom lip between his lips. ‘Jagi I-’

‘Dont Jagi I me. I saw what happened. I was there.’ You said turning to leave again. His hand reached for yours again and pulled you back around but this time when he turned you he saw just how hurt you were. ‘Please, I didnt mean it. I didnt think.’ He said trying to pull you into a hug. ‘Mark, stop.’ You said taking in a shaky breath. The hurt in his eyes made your heart turn over and you knew he meant it, you just weren’t ready to forgive him. ‘Im so sorry.’ was all he could whisper as he let you walk away again.

He knew you too well. The moment you were wrapped up in your blankets, tears slowing down and the need for him to hold you over powering you he was already in the room. He’d muster out a small ‘Jagi?’ Seeing if you were willing to talk to him and when you let your head poke up from the covers he’d rush over to you, making you scoot onto his side of the bed so he could slip under the covers in front of you and pull you into his chest. This brought a new wave of tears as you fisted the fabric of his shirt and cried. ‘I love you so much, I’m so sorry.’ you cried. He stroked your hair and made soft shushing noises to break up the sad ‘I love you’s’ he was whispering back to you.

Jackson:

Being completely oblivious of what had happened he’d be all over you the moment you stepped out of the shower. His hand would reach out for your towel and tug at it, laughing playfully as you tugged away from him and continued your way towards the bedroom. He’d then wrap his arms around you and continue to walk you forward, kissing your bare shoulder as the two of you went.

‘I swear to God, Jackson. Get off of me.’ You said shaking your shoulder hard, not caring as it ran gently into his chin.

‘y/n?’ He said, he would have thought you were just kidding and would have jumped right back into playing around, but the fact the you didnt apologize for hitting him in the face set his alarms off. You ignored him, and not caring if he was still standing there watching you, you stripped. Replacing the towel with your pajamas you climbed into bed and pulled the covers up, biting your lip as your eyes began to water. Jackson would call your name again and soon the feeling of the bed dipping down around you told you that he was sitting next to you. ‘I said leave me alone, Jackson.’ Your voice failed, giving off the fact that you were now crying.

‘Jagi, whats wrong? Hey, hey!’ He’d say softly, pulling at your arms till you were sitting up with your face in his chest.

‘Don’t touch me!’ You yelled hitting his chest, but as you tried to pull your arms out of his grip he just held on tighter, not letting you go.

‘Talk to me, why are you mad!’

‘You!” You screamed, finally getting him to let you go. ‘You sit there and humiliate me letting that… that bimbo actively flirt with you! She knew exactly what she was doing and stared at me while she did it! Obviously knowing that you weren’t going to do shit! You-’ He cut you off by pulling you into his chest, tears stinging his eyes as he realized what he had done and how much he had actually hurt you.

All he could do was say he was sorry as he buried his face into your neck, holding onto you tightly. His sorries would be staggered with a string of ‘please don’t leave me, please ill change.’ It would shock him how much this actually bothered him. You half expected him to laugh at your tears and tell you you were dumb, but how upset he had gotten only told you how much he loved you. You’d surprise him when you wrapped your arms around his head, your fingers gently playing with his hair as you silently cried realizing how rude you were being.

‘please don’t give me a reason to think you don’t love me.’ would be all you said before letting him kiss you sweetly.

Jinyoung:

Conversations from earlier in the day would sent him in a certain mood and while you showered it’d be all he could think about. He’d have trouble containing himself as he waited for the water to turn off and as soon as it did he was outside the bathroom door to wait for you. He’d smirk as you opened the door and looked up to him before walking right past to the bedroom. He followed you, watching the way your hips swayed under the towel and how your wet hair left streams of water down your bare back. You’d have walked up to the bed where your usual sleeping shirt was laying, not even realizing Jinyoung was standing behind you until his hands were running up your bare arms. You ignored him while reaching forward to slip the shirt over your body before stepping just out of his reach to slip on a pair of shorts. He’d step to you and take your cheeks between his hands before trying to lean down to kiss you. When you pulled your face from his hands he’d look at you with upset and confused eyes, confused as to why you were acting like this when not even three hours ago you were whispering things to one another. ‘Are we not going to do this?’ He’d ask, the throbbing in his pants subsiding as he thought about your buzz kill mood.

‘No, Jinyoung. Were not ‘doing this’.’ You said scoffing at him before walking back into the bathroom. He’d roll his eyes and turned around, readying himself for bed. Lights out and laying as far from him as possible you started to cry. He didnt care, if he did he would have figured out that you were mad at him by then. You’d sniffle once as his arm lazily found its way around your neck like it did every night, but still nothing. You’d take his arm off of you, removing yourself from the comfort of your blanket. He’d watch you stand up and make your way to the kitchen, eyebrows pressing together when you refused to return. He never was able to sleep well without you.

‘Jagi? Are you okay?” He’d finally say, bringing him from the bed and making his way over to you.

‘Go back to bed Jinyoung.’ You’d say. He’d realized that it wasn’t the kitchen that you had gone to, but the couch in the living room.

‘What are you doing in here?’ He said, eyebrows still pressed together.

‘Sleeping. Go away.’ You said rolling over so your back was not to him.

‘I dont understand why you would sleep out here when-’

‘Of course you don’t understand, Jinyoung! You never understand. You never open your eyes and realize how big of an idiot you are!’ You said, sitting fully up. You couldn’t help but cringe slightly at your choice of words.

‘Why are you acting like this?’ He’d say crossing his arms over his chest.

‘Why are you putting me second place to other girls? If i knew all it took was a few bats of the eyelash I wouldn’t have waisted any of my time!’ You said standing up so you were now practically nose to nose.

‘When did i put you second-’

‘The fact that you even have to ask that question is the reason why. I get it, girls flirt with you all day long, its apart of the job. But when Im- me the girl you live with and say ‘I love you’ too every night, when Im sitting there and its very obvious you’re into the attention the cute make up artist is giving you its very obvious I’m second.

‘Thats not true, y/n.’ He’d say making you scoff.

‘Then how about this,’ You started standing up, now more angry than ever. ‘You get to sleep on the couch tonight. See for yourself how it feels to be second.’ You said throwing the couch pillow at him and storming off into the bedroom. He wouldn’t let it drop that easy and would come bursting into the bed room, grabbing your hand and pulling you to look at him before you could get into bed.

‘Nothing. No one comes before you. Let that be clear. And now being aware of it I will make sure to put you where you deserve to be.’ He’d pause, hastily reaching for your cheek to stoke it, smiling slightly to himself when you let him. ‘I love you so much. Im so sorry you have to put up with my shit.’

Youngjae:

The moment you had started to act distant towards him he’d know something was wrong. Usually when you got upset with him he’d wait it out, apologizing for what ever he did and you would turn around, tell him it was okay and the two of you would cuddle it out. This time was different. He had tried to hold your hand on the car ride home only to have you turn your attention to Jackson and start talking about how he thought the day went. He’d try again a little later, this time apologizing, but when you rolled your eyes knowing perfectly that he had no idea what he was apologizing for you’d just give him a stern look before folding your arms across your chest. Once home, he followed you like a puppy just trying to get you to talk to him but when you slammed the bathroom door in his face and turned on the water to drown out his calls he finally stopped. He’d go to your bedroom and sit on the bed with his head in his hands trying to figure out away to get you to tell him what was wrong. He ended on trying something new. No more pleading, just your favorite acts of love.

He’d watch you walk into your bedroom with just a towel wrapped around you. The daggers you sent him before turning back to your closet made him nervous. With a mental Fuck it He’d stand and close the space between the two of you. Just like he hoped you melted under his touch, letting him kiss up your neck till his lips landed on your cheek. You turned, ready to finally say anything and he’d press his lips to you, giving you the rough passionate kiss that always took you by surprise.

‘Im so sorry, I love you so much.’ He’d say between kisses. This brought reality back into your mind and instantly you pushed him off of you.

‘You don’t even know what your sorry about.’ you said softly, no matter how mad you were you couldn’t get yourself to yell at him.

‘Please.’

‘Jae, you… That girl was all over you and you did nothing.’ You said biting your lip. The hurt in his eyes making you feel small and want nothing more than to wrap your arms around him. He hurt you though.

‘I didnt even realize it.’ He said, now knowing exactly what you were talking about. You gave a sarcastic laugh and shook you head, turning away from him once more.

‘You could have anyone and the fact that she felt like she could do that right infant of me just proves that you aren’t as serious about this as I am. I love you with all of my heart and you give girls the vibe that they can take you from me when ever they want. If that happened while I was sitting right next to you what happens when I’m not?’ You said, his eyes began to glisten at what you were suggesting.

‘I would never let anyone come between us, y/n. You know that.’

‘Do I? Because the one time you had a chance to actually prove that you did nothing.’

Thats what would wreck him. The fact that you were right, a girl was actively flirting with him and instead of stopping it he let it happen and he let you see it. He wouldn’t say anything other than a small ‘you’re right.’ to which you’d nod and let him pull you into another hug, this time accepting his promises to always be more attentive to what was happening around him, wether you were there or not.

BamBam:

You could hardly walk out of the bathroom you had been silently tearing in for the past hour without BamBam coming up behind you and slipping his hands under the towel that you clung to your body. ‘God, I want you so bad right now.’ He’d say, his lips grazing your ear before he nipped gently and started to kiss on your sweet spot. Normally you would be a giggling mess right now, already pooling in your panties just with the sole fact of getting him naked. He didnt seem to notice your lack of excitement through the feeling of your next to naked body was pressed against his already growing member. ‘You horny cause that bitch turned you on?’ You said finally getting enough courage to pull out of his grip. Not waiting for a response you walked into the bedroom and slammed the door, and quickly changing before he could walk into the room.

‘What do you mean?’ He’d say with a light bite to his voice.

‘Do you feel obligated to come back to me every night? Is that why we literally have sex all the time? Because girls at work are basically dry humping your dick and you feel like you can’t act on it? Do you picture them when you flip me over?’ You said throwing your towel at him. He caught it, his expression going from 100 to 0 real quick.

‘How could you say that?’ He said, his voice now small.

‘How could I say that?’ You started crossing your arms over your chest. ‘How could you basically let every girl in that room earlier know that Im just a show? That anyone could have you if they just tried hard enough!’ You said throwing the towel that was on your head at him now.

‘Does she fulfill your needs when I can’t? Will she let you do things that I’m uncomfortable with? Was that her marking her territory? Letting me know that you really don’t work late hours, that you spend more time with her?’ You yelled, frustration making your face read and your eyes tear up again.

‘Are you really- do you really think I would cheat on you?’ He said trying to take a step forward, but the look on your face told him he’d be better staying where he was.

‘I didnt think you would actually engage in a flirty conversation in front of me, but here we are.’

He was speechless. He knew there was nothing he could say to make you feel better and it was overwhelming. He’d move to sit on the edge of the bed and dropped his head into his hands, wracking his brain on something to say that would make you feel better. Your heart lurched for him and for a second you wanted him to hold you, but you were to proud. It didnt help that he thought of him knocking boots with the make up artist in a closet kept running through your mind. With a single tear running down your cheek you started to walk out of the room, the sight of him making your feel sick. You had been so convinced up until now that he was the love of your life. That nothing could touch the two of you.

You weren’t even able to make it to the door when he grabbed your wrist and pulled you hard. You didnt even have a chance to stumble before he was hugging you tightly, his arms wrapping themselves around your neck and shoulders.

‘Please, please don’t. I would never… I love you so much, please don’t walk away.’

‘Then give me a reason to stay.’ you said, both of you crying silent tears. He’d sniffle and lean back just enough to take your cheeks between his hands. He looked at you longingly, thumbs softly stroking the backs of your cheeks. There was a slight hiccup in his chest before he kissed you softly. Despite how angry you were the same feeling of excitement and passion erupted through your entire body. It was so loud in your ear that you didnt even realize your arms had reached up to hold him to you.

‘Please believe me when I say Id never do anything like that.’

Yugyeom:

Walking out of the shower you’d walk right into his arms. You had looked so amazing that day and he could hardly wait to get you home and express just how beautiful you were to him. His lips would be on yours in an instant as he softly held your head to his. He’d tried to deepen the kiss but you weren’t budging. You couldn’t ever get yourself to hurt Yugyeom, no matter how stupid he could be at times. Even now as you were held tightly to his chest, the sight of the make up artist blowing on his lips and the noise he had made kept running through your mind. You finally pushed him off of you, feeling like you could taste her breath. ‘No. Not happening.’ You said walking away from him.

You’ve played this game before, let him kiss you a bit and then moving away. He knew you loved to be chased so with a goofy grin he’d walk quickly after you, bending so he could get a good grip of your waist before picking you up off the ground.

‘Yugyeom I said no!.’ You yelled prying his hands off of you before turning around and pushing his chest. His face would fall in confusion, now not quite sure how serious you were being. You’ve never pushed him away that hard before. He decided to try again thinking maybe third times a charm.

‘Get off of me!’ You screamed raising your elbow from his grip. ‘Do not touch me. Do not touch me, do not touch me! Damn get it through your thick skull!’ You yelled as you turned to face him.

‘Why are you being like this?’ He’d say, it now fully registering that you were pissed.

‘Oh I don’t know, maybe its the weather, maybe I’m on my period. Or maybe, and you’ll laugh at this one, maybe my boyfriend was sitting there letting some girl mock me while she basically pissed all over you!’ You yelled, not caring how loud your voice had gotten. You watched as his eyes closed and he sat on the bed.

‘What, you’re mad she proved to me how easy it is to get to you? How easy it would be for her to take you from me?’ You bit.

‘I would never leave you for her.’ he said, but it seemed to just make things worse.

‘Fine, maybe not her. But if she could get that close to get under my skin I can only imagine what someone else could do. You’re gone a lot and I thought you understood how i felt about you and how I feel about not being able to be with you all the time. Why shouldn’t I get mad when a girl who sees you more then I do starts blowing all over you. Actions speak louder than words and you the letting go of me the moment she batter her eyes at you was a message I received loud and clear.’

‘Y/n,’ He said looking back to you. You waited for him to say something but ended up scoffing as he took to long to find his words.

‘Y/n please, I didnt even realize-’

‘Of course you didnt, why would you.’

‘Don’t be like this.’ He’d say standing up and making his way over to you.

‘Like what? Worried that the one person I love more than anything else is allowing girls to throw themselves all over him? And then does it when I’m sitting right there? Do you know how much that hurts?’ You said, clearing your throat to try and hide the way it had faulted.

‘I messed up. I wasn’t even paying attention to her, I… Its sounds cliché…’ He started, but bit his lip and looked at the floor when you had risen an eyebrow at him. ‘Its just you looked so pretty today and I was embarrassed cause, well you do things to me…’

In that instant your hard face fell and your eyes widened.

‘Wait.’ You said, covering your mouth. ‘You were sitting there letting me scream at you because you were horny and trying to hide it?’ You said trying to hide your laugh.

‘Dont laugh at me, you always do that to me.’ He said giving you a small worried smile.

His body would relax when you reached out for him and hugged his was it tightly. ‘Im sorry I assumed the worse.’ You said into his shirt.

‘I didnt realize how bad it looked. Im sorry.’ He said hugging you back.

Midnight Circus pt. 2

Originally posted by jeonilys

☾pairing: Jungkook ♡→  reader
☾genre: Angst. Fluff. Mature content. badboysummerfling au
☾summary: “You’re ten times hotter this summer, you know that?”

| 1 | 2 | coming soon


It was a delightful morning, you underestimated the amount of peace there was at a camping ground when night fell. You were fully rested and ready for the day. Everyone hadn’t left the cabins yet but those of you who did went to the recreational center for breakfast. You piled the roasted potatoes on your plate and walked back to the table with Nayeon, Jin, Namjoon and Jennie, everyone else was asleep so you guys left them alone. The whether was nice, breakfast was delicious, Jungkook wasn’t here, it was close to perfect.

“After breakfast I planned some stuff for all us.” Jennie brought the mug to her lips and sipped the bitter sweet coffee. “We can get cleaned up then we’ll hike up to the springs and eat lunch there, we can swim for a little while too.” When Jennie looked up to see Beah and Naeun we’re coming to the table and you braced yourself, you knew who wasn’t far behind them. Low and behold, Jimin, Tae and Jungkook walked in and you sighed—he glanced at you before grabbing a plate for breakfast, his hair was so fluffy and too soft to be his own, you wondered why the worst people have the prettiest features.

“Good morning,” Jimin came to sit next to Namjoon and across from Beah, with a bowl of fruit. Taehyung came to sit next to Beah, putting the seat beside you up for grabs. 

“Did you guys sleep well?” Jennie was really just indirectly asking Jimin. 

“Yeah, I kept hearing a weird sound though like a cat or something…” Tae mumbled and Nayeon nodded in agreement.

“I heard that too,” She gasped, “oh my God, are there wildcats out here?”

You giggled as Jennie tried to convince everyone that there has only ever been one wildcat sighting, most of them weren’t convinced. When Taehyung brought up the subject of the ‘thing’ in the tree outside of his window, you couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous he was.

“There was not!” Jimin playfully slapped his arm. “You shouldn’t have eaten those snacks, you were just seeing things.” 

Jungkook actually chuckled—he, of course, had to sit right next to you. His plate was piled uo like most of the guys but his plates always looked huge. You ate your potatoes, sipped your juice and got up to take your empty plate—you wanted to get away from him before you two started at it again. You grimaced at having to go back to that table, you could practically feel Jungkook looking at you—his eyes as unapologetic as ever when you looked back at him. Feeling your pink pajama shorts lift slightly prompted you to quickly tug them down. You kept your cool and walked to the fruit bar, making a nice bowl of pineapples before taking your seat beside him. It was ridiculous how he kept eyeing you like you didn’t notice him staring, he scrap his fork against his teeth and just glare at you.

You ate about three pieces until you saw his greasy fingers stroll into your view, attempting to take one of your pineapples, you smacked his hand, moving your chair farther from him—he is a literal child. He doesn’t understand the concept of enemies, he acts like your annoying friend one second and he’s pissing you off the next. He giggled, trying to grab it again just to annoy you.

“Stop.” You glared at him—looking down at your pineapples, they didn’t even look all that appetizing anymore. 

He had the nerve to scoff, letting out an exasperated sigh. “Why do you have to get worked up over pointless shit like pineapples?” He grabbed the same pineapple he was gonna eat originally and popped it in his mouth. “It’s fucking fruit. You need to learn how to share.”

“It’s my fruit, and I think you’re forgetting that we’re not on good terms.” You crossed your arms—you’ve never glared at anyone with such animosity. “And I don’t share with heathens like you…”

“Me? A heathen?” He feigned a look of shock. “You nag about everything, no wonder you never get any-” If he would’ve finished that sentence you would’ve strangled him.

“Are you two seriously fighting over a bowl of pineapples?” Namjoon called you two out causing the whole table to stare at the both of you. Of course you both started defending yourselves, your words clashing together like children trying to prove their points in a feud.

“Hey! We don’t want to hear about your pineapples guys,” Jennie spoke up, “let’s go get ready for the springs.” At that everyone agreed and got up, leaving their plates and continuing their conversations. As you were storming back to the cabin Naeun came to walk beside you, just skipping along like there was no tomorrow. You thought she was more excited to go swimming and you could understand why—swimming with all of those good looking guys was pretty exciting but you didn’t even think of that. You are going to have a good time, he wasn’t about to get the best of you, not now.

You washed up, put on light make up and slid on a pair of jean shorts over your bathing suit. When you tied your hair in a ponytail you got a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, Beah and Jennie were getting ready in the mirror as well. 

“You look cute Y/N,” Jennie looked back at your somewhat uncharacteristically revealing get up, “I don’t think Jeon will be able to argue with you in that, honestly you guys would be cute if you could stay in a room without killing each other.” She giggled, the way you grimaced in disgust was priceless.

“You’re kidding?” You wanted to vomit—that thought never even crossed your mind, “No, we wouldn’t, ugh, don’t even think of that. All I see Jungkook as is a means to ruin my life. And FYI he’ll lust after anything with boobs so it doesn’t matter what any of us wear, he undresses people with his eyes…” They all laughed but it was true, and you were determined not to let him touch any of your friends. 

“I wouldn’t mind that entirely.” Naeun walked in, she wore a black one piece with large openings on the sides to show quite a bit of skin. “He’s one of the hottest guys in school, and you get to fight with him.” She snickered.

“First of all, that’s gross. Second of all, he’s not ugly, that’s all I have to say about his looks.” Everyone was in there swimsuits, had their bags with shoes, extra clothes and some snacks. When the five of you walked out the boys were already waiting for you guys outside of their cabin.

Jin stretched. “So how long is the hike?” 

Jennie pulled out a can of bug spray and offered some to everyone before spraying her legs and arms. “Like 15 to 20  minutes, it’s not that long. Since I’m leading the hike, I’ll do it like my aunt does it. Everyone can grab a buddy to walk with so we don’t get separated!” She cut her eyes to you before smirking, she was doing this on purpose. 

You had your eye on Jimin but Nayeon beat you to it, your next option was Jin but Jennie purposely walked with him since they were the oldest. Namjoon walked with Beah, Tae walked with Naeun. When you looked around you saw everyone had a partner and followed Jennie into the woods, and of course you were at the end of the line—with him.

“Jen!” You shouted from the back running up beside her, “Can I-”

“You and Jungkook are partners, you can’t third wheel with me now go back.” She shooed you away, you’ve never felt more betrayed in your life. They all walked by, talking and smiling as Jungkook was walking towards you, an innocent look on his face.

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Wirt's Inferno/Dante's Unknown: Allusions to the Divine Comedy in Over the Garden Wall

Introduction

I must stress that the parallels I draw between Over the Garden Wall and Dante’s Inferno are rather broad as they study the overall themes of the latter in comparison to the occurrences in the former. In my defense, the work that chartered what many consider to be the definitive version of Hell, while undoubtedly a monumental and well-constructed masterpiece of literature, contains several understandable prejudices of the author that are not reflected in the cartoon proper. The primordial spirit of the circles however, the fundamental vices that make the Divine Comedy resonate even centuries later, are incorporated into the narrative as are the broad strokes of Dante’s strange journey through the afterlife.

The Travelers

Wirt

Wirt, like Dante, is a poet and shares several traits with the Italian soldier and occasional politician. One of the most obvious of these besides his enjoyment of prose is his infatuation with a girl he finds to be truly exceptional, Sara. Like Dante, he seems content to appreciate her from afar and like Dante’s Beatrice, Sara inspires Wirt to create art in his poetry and clarinet mixtape. However, this distance he places between him and her is shown to be a source of great unhappiness, and while he does go on a fantastic adventure in the vein of “courtly love” (a concept Dante lionized) that inexplicably gives him an opportunity to tell her his feelings, it’s made clear that just talking with her would’ve saved him a lot of trouble.

Pride is another quality that Wirt and Dante share. Despite his lack of self-esteem, Wirt tries to, with mixed success, lord over the one person he is confident and cruel enough to impose upon: Greg, who he believes to be an immature imbecile. I must call to your attention that a surefire way to be sent to the Inferno is to be in denial of your own wrongdoings. Wirt is the principle reason that he and Greg wound up in the Unknown, but his insistence that he is guiltless and that Greg is at fault is strongly implied to be the major obstacle preventing them from leaving it.

Then there are the realms themselves. Though one of the most popular visions of the Judeo-Christian underworld, Dante’s Inferno was a very personal invention and reflected a multitude of the author’s own interests and beliefs. Similarly, it’s heavily implied in the ninth chapter that the Unknown was constructed out of Wirt’s (and some of Greg’s) experiences and hobbies. Both poets likewise find themselves frequently bemused in their quests, despite the strange lands they are stranded in containing a multitude of things they are familiar with.

On a bittersweet note, Wirt has one immense difference that sets him apart from Dante: Wirt actually succeeded in returning home while Dante spent his later years exiled from his beloved Florence, lamenting his separation from his birthplace.

Beatrice

While the creative talents behind the program have confirmed that Beatrice was named after Dante’s muse and guide in Paradiso, the Beatrice of Over the Garden Wall spends most of the story being the antithesis of her namesake; discouraging what she considers to be frivolous flights of fancy and spending half of the miniseries leading the brothers to ruination rather than salvation. After undergoing a personal journey of her own, her behavior becomes more in line with Dante’s lost love, saving Wirt and even accompanying him during the last part of his eerie pilgrimage.

Greg

Wirt’s Virgil. While more spontaneous and prone to distraction, Greg is something of a poet himself, composing several uplifting songs over the course of the chapters in contrast to his brother’s defeatist lamentations. These improvised tunes being beloved by others and Wirt’s eloquent moanings being ignored (by Greg) or mocked (by Wirt himself) allude to how Virgil and Dante’s poems were regarded during the Divine Comedy respectively. Greg may not have a working knowledge of the Unknown, but his courage and curiosity place him in a better position to engage and resolve the trials the pair face, making him an unorthodox guide to his older and craven sibling. As it was with Virgil, Greg is incapacitated during the final leg of the journey, and Wirt must solve the mystery of the Unknown without him.

The Entrance: Abandon all hope, ye who enter here 

Dante’s quest begins in a forest. In Wirt and Greg’s case, that’s true in more ways than one. As our Narrator kindly reminds us, the Unknown can be entered by those “who travel through the wood”.  This applies to the part of the Unknown they find themselves in initially and the near death experience they shared after almost drowning in a wooded area.

Echoing Dante’s opening plight, Wirt and Greg are pursued by a savage monster. Though Greg’s quick thinking saves their lives, mirroring Virgil’s rescue of Dante from the three beasts chasing him, the altercation destroys the safe haven of the mill, forcing the two of them to travel deeper into the Unknown. Before they go, the Woodsman warns them that the surrounding woods are the home of the Beast, “the death of hope”. However, defying the famous epithet that marks the entrance to the Inferno, he later clarifies that losing hope is about the last thing you want to do in the Unknown as it puts you squarely in the Beast’s clutches.

The First Level: Limbo

Pottsfield is not Limbo itself as the Unknown fits that description better, but it embodies the dilemma that is usually presented to characters that realize they are in Limbo: stay here and be at peace or struggle further in the hopes that you will return home. The passive Wirt is momentarily seduced to choose the first option by how simple and quiet “life” there is and him changing his mind is done more out of being disturbed by the town’s macabre disposition than any real strength of will on his part. Fittingly, as is the fate of those that move past this relatively idyllic portion of hades for deeper zones, this arguably puts him in even greater danger.

Note: The town gets its namesake from a “Potter’s Field”, a type of gravesite for unknown corpses. Conversely, the denizens of Pottsfield all seem to have names, perhaps having regained the identities “lost” during their burial.

The Second Level: Lust

Miss Langtree’s fixation over Jimmy Brown’s supposed infidelity renders her unable to teach. This subsequently renders the sacrifices of her father to keep the school open moot, who in turn accuses Jimmy Brown of “gallivanting”. The two of them are not necessarily bad people, but much like Wirt, they’re too busy moaning about their troubles to fix them. This is made more evident by how Jimmy wasn’t up to any sort of debauchery and was merely working hard to consummate his love for Miss Langtree in the proper fashion. Therefore lust in practice is not the debilitating force here, but the obsession over it.

The Third Level: Gluttony

The patrons and staff of the tavern are people of purpose. Each has their role, their profession, and thus an identity to call their own. All are welcome, even thieves and killers. There is however, one major exception: The Beast. Despite having a “job” of his own and a great singing voice, he is feared and reviled all the same. The innkeeper implies that this is due in part to how the beast lies to get what he wants, in contrast to an “honest” scoundrel like the Highwayman.  

There is also the fact that, unbeknownst to those who fear him, the Beast doesn’t actually “work with his hands” and instead tricks people into acting as his proxies. The metamorphosis into an Edelwood tree, might not even be his own doing. It could just be something that happens to those that fall to despair in the Unknown, a quirk of the land that he exploits so he can keep his lantern fed and even that might be a cruel indulgence. He is not a tradesman, foul or not, he is a parasite. To summarize, the Beast and his lantern are entities of excess as they do not truly earn what they so gratuitously consume.

Note: Something else worth mentioning is how Greg keeps bringing food to his and Wirt’s table to satiate his hunger, but no one, not even his Frog, is ever shown eating any of it.

The Fourth Level: Greed

Quincy Endicott is dead. The tombstone in the Eternal Garden cemetery all but proves that. Thus his and Marguerrite Grey’s fear of one another is simultaneously justified and absurd. Fair enough, but the core theme of this episode doesn’t lie in a Sixth Sense-esque twist, but in the insatiable sinkhole of greed. Quincy is rather frank (while stepping on franks) that his entire life was/has been dedicated to the accumulation of money. He is also quick to tell us that these riches have gone into making his home bigger and in turn, more hollow. Consequently, the tea tycoon is made to feel small and alone in his own house, unable to derive joy from making money as he confesses to despising the beverage he peddles: Indeed, he all but states that he’s done reprehensible things to amass his fortune. He has no one to talk to apart from his peacocks as his estate is devoid of any staff; only opulent furniture keeps him company indoors. The mansion itself is apparently turning on him as well, coming into the possession of new rooms and wings that he can’t recall commissioning that make him feel more lost and confused than ever. There is a glimmer of beauty and hope in this increasingly alien environment when he chances upon a portrait of a beautiful woman, and then things get even worse for him until his “nephews” bail him out. 

The punishment of this circle for those who lived their lives with avarice in their hearts is an eternal jousting match where they are put on one of two sides and “joust” with one another using massive weights. This is expressed in how despite living in the same building, Quincy and Marguerrite have spent an undefined amount of time barely missing one another; locked in a frustrated and chaste dance with no end in sight. For as far as the two of them are concerned, to confront one another directly only has two awful outcomes: the ghost is real, making their love unfeasible or there is no ghost, which would mean that the two of them have gone mad. A line shared by the star-crossed aristocrats when they recognize one another’s names proves that this is all an immense allusion to their situation before they died. They had never met, nor knew what the other looked like. What they did know was that the opposite party was their “business competitor”, a reprehensible entity that dared to get in the way of them gaining a monopoly on tea, a scoundrel that hampered the accumulation of personal wealth. How could they have known that the cure for their loneliness lay in the arms of their respective rivals? And so it was that these two nobles would spend their hereafters haunted by the specter of the love and happiness they deprived themselves of during their mortal existences; architects of a gilded mausoleum. Thankfully, Wirt and Greg help overturn this bedlam and a happy conclusion is reached for Endicott and Grey, who manage to put aside the past animosity that kept them apart while they still had pulses.

Fred is also a creature of greed, a literal horse thief who despite his lack of hands has apparently stolen a great many things before meeting our protagonists. Once he is confronted by the possibility that his kleptomania might get him killed, he swears that he will cease his wrongful purloining and get an honest job. True to his word, he elects to stay behind with Quincy and Grey as “an official tea horse.” In a moment that is up for debate and interpretation, the epilogue has a scene where Marguerrite is staring at a portrait of Quincy and Fred. If this was painted before she and Quincy properly met, mirroring how Quincy fell in love with her image in the painting, then Fred might very well have been Endicott’s steed when they were both alive, adding a sense of irony to the horse unwittingly trying to steal from his former master.

The Fifth Level: Anger and Sorrow

While this circle is primarily associated with Anger, the sullen are punished here as well. They are cursed to eternally drown in the waters of the River Styx, where there is no hope of salvation or joy with the frogs sinking into the mud acting as a visual representation of this. Though the brothers begin the episode with much optimism and mirth, the discovery that their entire quest was a farce causes Wirt’s spirits to sink, dragged down by the betrayal of someone he considered to be his friend. Wirt, as we are soon to find out, doesn’t have many friends. Worse, he is without a guide, and he and Greg are rendered more lost than ever before with no clear goal to work towards.

Anger is expressed in the simple, but understated act of Wirt stealing Adelaide’s scissors, despite having no real use for them himself past cutting the strings, in order to punish Beatrice for deceiving him and Greg.

Note: I would be remiss not to mention the various references to the afterlife in the voyage itself that others have noted in the past. The ferry is Charon’s boat of course, and the two cents acting as the two coins that the morbid boatman usually accepts as his fare. The frogs hibernating in the mud could also be called them taking a “dirt nap”, a colloquialism for being dead and buried.

The Sixth Level: Heresy

Witches and evil spirits are the obvious embodiments of the circle’s theme of heresy, but this episode also has the power of doctrine as a central theme. After all, what is a heretical action without a coda to rebel against? The bell’s hold over Lorna and the Evil Spirit represents the power of instruction. Rules and laws have the capacity to oppress and protect, to enslave or liberate. Auntie Whispers feared Lorna leaving her once she was cured and used the bell to forcefully keep her niece at her side by restraining the spirit, but not exorcising it. Greg had the gumption to use the bell against Lorna, but was too callow to understand how to use it properly. Ultimately it is Wirt, the one usually wracked with indecision and uncertainty that realizes what must be done and does what Whispers was too selfish (and Greg too ignorant) to do.

The Beast is shown to use a doctrine of his own to manipulate the Woodsman. Simple rules: keep the lantern lit and your daughter “lives”. When the Woodsman wonders if there is “a better way”, the Beast is adamant that his word is law and his methods absolute. He is lying of course, but by himself, how can the Woodsman hope to see past the only options presented to him?

The Seventh Level: Violence

A small scale war is waged between the People of Cloud City and the frightfully destructive North Wind. The elemental eventually comes into direct conflict with Greg and the climax of the episode is a battle on two fronts as the blustering bruiser attempts to trounce Greg in his sleep and freeze him outside of it. The boy triumphs with his usual mixture of audaciousness and creativity; of course you can beat a raging storm by stuffing it into a bottle!

Prominent features of this level of the Inferno include a treacherous river located in the outer ring (as represented by the one Wirt and Greg travel on during the chapter’s start, and the one Wirt falls into at its end) and a terrible storm in the inner ring (The North Wind). The middle is what’s most  interesting to people that are familiar with both the Divine Comedy and Over the Garden Wall as it is filled with grotesque trees made from the bodies of those that committed suicide, individuals that gave up on living and surrendered to self-destruction. Wirt is rescued from this terrible (and self-inflicted) transformation by Greg’s sacrifice, but the connection remains rather poignant as it helps build on the idea that the Unknown is a place between life and death.

The Eighth Level: Fraud

Halloween is a day of the dead and a day of disguise. It is a night of imposters and make-believe. What better time to play out the themes of fraud than this? Paradoxically, it is also where a great many truths are revealed alongside a showcase of the many lies that Wirt has invented to exonerate himself from his own cowardice. Among the things we learn is that Wirt and Greg are two American children from the late 20th century, the Garden Wall that the show’s title alludes to was that of a cemetery (named “Eternal Garden”), and that Jason Funderberker isn’t the stud Wirt whines about him being.

Perhaps the greatest display of this episode’s themes lies in Greg and Wirt’s apparel. Greg explains that he wears a tea kettle on his head because he’s pretending to be an elephant. It’s a simple and abstract costume, but one with purpose. Then there’s Wirt’s more elaborate ensemble. When asked what he’s dressed as, Wirt can’t answer the question. He has no idea. The montage of him assembling its components might’ve given him a burst of confidence, but it is ousted as having been utterly nonsensical. That is not to say that Wirt is not masquerading as something. It’s just that he’s disguised as someone who’s wearing a costume: a charlatan’s charlatan.

Counterfeiters and hypocrites rate high (or low, depending on how you look at it) on this plane, and Wirt’s a little bit of both. He wants someone to lead the way and be brave for him, but resents Greg’s aid. His carelessness is what loses him the tape in the first place, which he blames Greg for. Wirt also mistakes his brother’s initiative for recklessness and kneecaps whatever progress Greg’s actions might’ve netted him. Finally, he creates an obtuse narrative that frames Greg and his stepfather as saboteurs due to their insistence that he join marching band. Had he listened, the act might’ve brought him closer to Sara, who he considers lost to him now due to the imagined sabotage. Through reflection, Wirt realizes this and against his usual cowardice, heads out into a brutal blizzard in hopes of saving the brother he disowned and practically drowned. 

The Ninth Level: Treachery

As with any circle, this one closes where it began. It is a chapter of resolution, but also of return. The final act of the production is set in the woods surrounding the Old Grist Mill, the primary location of the first chapter’s happenings now repaired. It is winter, and even those who only have a broad knowledge of Dante’s Inferno know that while the upper levels of that dismal pit may be rife with fire and brimstone, the very bottom is deathly cold.

The Beast is decked out in satanic narrative and visual trappings from across the centuries: the horns, the name, the association with darkness and witchcraft, the predilection for making deals with the desperate and the gullible, and a monstrous reputation that’s justified by the evil he masterminds and commits. He fools his victims into committing worthless and futile acts that serve no higher purpose outside of his personal benefit. Above all else, he is treacherous, a trait that is made distinct from fraud by how it is a betrayal of a more intimate sort. In insincere defiance of his fearsome reputation, he tries to pass himself off as helpful and altruistic; telling the Woodsman, Greg, and Wirt that he’ll help them out if they perform some simple, but essentially idiotic tasks for an indefinite (read: forever) amount of time. Fittingly, it’s Wirt, whose character arc has him learning to stop being a pushover and take responsibility for himself, who sees through the passive-aggressive charade and puts the villain into a corner.

We are given a brief flash of the Beast’s actual appearance, a horrific mass of flesh made up of dozens of anguished faces. His many mouths were a conscious design choice by the creative team to incite feelings of trypophobia (a fear of holes) in viewers with that brief glance, but they’re also symbolic of the circular nature of the Beast. A shadow cannot exist without light; his existence depends on keeping the lantern lit, but he can’t carry it around himself because doing so would reveal to all those he approached that the infamous Beast is nothing more than an abomination built from weakness, a wretch. The Devil of Dante’s Inferno was a fiend with multiple mouths that was comparatively imprisoned by his own wickedness. Over the Garden Wall is rife with characters that are trapped or feel they are trapped (Wirt, Greg, Jimmy Brown, the Langtrees, Quincy, Lorna, etc.), so it’s only fitting that the show’s antagonist is in an inescapable predicament of his own.

The ending of the first part of the Divine Comedy has Dante and Virgil escape Hell by climbing deeper into the earth using Satan’s body. In time, they pass right through the center of the planet and come out the other end. By going down, they eventually came right back up elsewhere. Such is the case with our protagonists as the Beast’s vanquishing facilitates a great many escapes and returns. Wirt returns to consciousness in the water and saves both himself and Greg from drowning; Beatrice, after unintentionally proving her nobility to Wirt, returns to her family with the scissors that will cure them all; the Woodsman reluctantly returns home and to his joy, discovers he was grossly deceived; we get an epilogue of sorts that shows us the secondary characters in states mirroring the ones they were in during the prologue, but mostly altered for the better; and the program ends as it began with the piano playing frog, who reveals (as hinted in the sixth chapter) that he was the narrator all along and might’ve made the whole thing up.

lesson one. | m

characters: jaebum x reader
genre: smut
wc: 4080
summary: jaebum is jealous. and for no good reason.
author’s note: okay, first of all, this isn’t your typical “the guy is jealous so he has to whisk you away from another guy just to prove to you who you belong to” scenario. no. this is a “you’re a dumbass for being jealous when the only person i want is you. now kiss me.” as from the reader’s perspective. so it’s jaebum getting called out… if that makes sense… i did say this’d be up before the end of the weekend. still got more to come.
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Mirror and stone

Sameen’s voice in Farsi is liquid and gentle. At least, it seems that way to you now, hearing her speak for the first time, your head in her lap and your eyes closed. One hand weaves through your hair; the other holds her father’s battered copy of Rumi’s love poetry.

It’s late, but neither of you can sleep. The spring night is unseasonably warm, so you’ve folded back the sheets and are currently sweating in a tank top and a pair of boxers from Sameen’s drawer. Seemed fair to steal, since you’re the one who dropped off and picked up her laundry at the wash-and-fold around the corner. The shirt you’re wearing is old enough that, even freshly laundered, it smells like her.

You don’t know what the words mean; you simply let them wash over you and through you. Sameen reads limpidly, fluently, in musical phrases. She smooths hair over your temple, cards through the strands, winds a curl around her finger.

The heat is making your shoulder ache; the painkillers you reluctantly took have only just started to work through your body and soften your thoughts. None of that matters much now, with your cheek resting on Sameen’s inner thigh and her voice pouring over and into every part of you.

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midnight star (1)

genre: thief!au

star of the show: NCT’s Taeyong

word count: 2,303 words

author’s note: the first part to a 7 part series because I’ve had this idea for too long and I love Taeyong.    

other parts: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7)

Originally posted by itsmyluxion

opening line: “A thief who steals to feed his own competitive ego, Lee Taeyong has never tried to steal something as intangible as a heart before, let alone yours.” 

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A-Z NSFW: Jooheon

Originally posted by mi-nhyuk

Cr.

Donate | Masterlist 

A = Aftercare 
Being a big softie, Jooheon takes damn good care of you afterwards. He may be soft, but sex isn’t that soft with him, so some form of aftercare is necessary. Aside from the typical clean up and pillow talk, he’s pretty big on light massages, even if it’s just when you’re cuddling in the aftermath, his fingers kneed the skin where he’d held you gentle, soothing the ache in hips before it set it, working the strain out of your thighs, making sure nothing will be felt the next morning. 

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) 

Lord knows rappers are the most gifted with their mouths and I think they’re well aware of that. Jooheon is too. He’s fairly proud in his abilities to make you quake just from his mouth, having you a quivering mess just by his tongue is quite possibly his favorite thing to do. Going hand in hand, Jooheon is absolutely obsessed with your thighs. Having them pressed around his head while he’s laid out between your legs, being able to hold them and restrain you, and feel them tremble under his touch when he brings you to your release just feeds his ego. 

C = Cum 

In general, he’s precise and clean when he finished. Condom, or on your tummy, somewhere it’s not a hassle to clean because he just wants to be able to get back in bed after a quick wipe down, instead of having to strip and redress the bed before he can curl back up with you. So he’s pretty conscious and consistent. 

D = Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs) 
Not gonna lie, his secret is probably a failed plot he just never told you about. Like once, Jooheon thought it’d be a good idea to be a bit bossy one night, get some special lingerie for you and have one hell of a night. Buuuut when he was setting up the ‘scene’ he managed to ruin the things he just got, and gave up. Threw away the ruined lingerie, and never spoke of it. 


E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
Jooheon is somewhat experienced, semi inexperienced. He’s got a full understanding of what to do, how to do it, but applying that to you takes a bit of adjusting; no ones the same in bed so it needs some tweaking. A bit sloppy at first, until he settles in, then Jooheon is good to go. 

F = Favorite position
In terms of positions, Jooheon likes to play around with those; they’re the least hazardous of things to try in the bedroom. Most days he’s a classic guy, he likes simple missionary. But he’s pretty fond of most any position. Missionary, doggy, different positions with your riding him, spooning, almost anything is a favorite in his book. 


G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

In the moment, Jooheon’s not so much goofy as he is lighthearted. He doesn’t usually put on some intense role, or make it feel like either of you have to react or behave a certain way in the bedroom. There’s moments when giggles do break out, and it’s completely comfortable, there’s just no pressure. 

H = Hair (How well groomed are they)
Jooheon leans more towards letting it do its own thing. He’s not really big on manscaping and it doesn’t happen very much, if every at all. So mostly, he’s not too groomed down there, he let’s it be free. 


I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He’s pretty soft, and rather big on intimacy during sex. Not so much setting a romantic, but he’s very expressive. He’s a talker, cooing affectionately throughout sex, heavy kissing and lots of eye contact. Between the intimate touches during sex, he’s a pillow talker afterwards, Jooheon certainly lets his feelings be known. 

J = Jack Off (Masturbation)
Jerking off is somewhat of a consistent thing with Jooheon. He’s hardly ever close to the point where he’s so horny he needs to have sex, that he needs his partner with him, rather than being able to just rub one out in the shower. And that’s what he usually does. Morning wood, random spur of being turned on, he hops in the shower and takes care of business. 


K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Jooheon’s kind of a softie, so don’t expect him to have any wild kinks. No bdsm is going on in his head. It’s more tamed things, that he gets really in to. Like having you beg. Begging is a huge kink of his, it feeds his ego, hearing you so desperate, pleading for more of his touch. Along that line, he’s quite big on marking, but he’s very specific with where. He’s fond of nipping and sucking along your thighs while he’s between your legs, and has you begging, spreading purple and red flowers across the skin. It’s something that turns him on, knowing the marks will be hidden, but you and him both know they’re there, and every time you dress or undress, you can’t avoid seeing the trail of bruises he’s left on the soft flesh. 

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Typically the bed is the easiest, and most comfortable, since normally with Jooheon, you’re going to be there for a while. But aside from that, Jooheon’s pretty fond of the shower/bath. A relaxing warm bath after a day’s work, with his lover, is a gift in his mind. It almost never starts off as a sex thing, just a comfortable bath together, and between you situated on his lap, and the warm water working the stress from him, ends in some nice, intimate and loving sex. 

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Begging is pretty much the easiest, and quickest turn on for him. Feeding in to Jooheon’s kinks, getting all whiny for him to take you somewhere to be alone, immediately lights the fire in his body. Or, at some times sex is just a calm, and spontaneous thing, not just you’re both turned on and jumping in bed. Sometimes it’s just when you’re relaxing together, and light kisses evolves into something else. He’s not quite turned on enough to do it, but situating himself between your legs, and having you begging mess, gets him going more than anything. 

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

While he does play around with dominant things, he likes being in control and having you beg for him, he’s not into titles. Master, daddy, etc. That’s all a bit too far in his mind. Sir is about the furthest he’ll go in that spectrum. 

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Oral is a big favorite of Jooheon’s. It just plays in to his kinks and gives him a bit of a power high, having you a mess just from his mouth alone. He’s a master at it, it’s one of his best skills in bed, turning you in to a moaning pile of mush with his tongue. Flip side to that, going down on him, Jooheon doesn’t object, and gives you complete control, doesn’t grab on you or control the speed you do it. It’s one of the few times you get to have him in the palm of your hand.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
Usually, Jooheon has a steady, average pace. He’s not slow, but he’s not rapidly thrusting in you. Firm, hard thrusts at an average pace is more his style. He’ll speed up more when either of you are close, or slow down if he’s in the mood for teasing and dragging sex out longer, but typically, his pace is average. 


Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
Being the more intimate lover he is, quickies aren’t a favorite of Jooheon’s. He’d rather have proper sex, and get to spend his time with you, so quickies are a very frequent occurrence. Usually if he’s in a position where a quicky is the only option, he’s good at containing himself and pushing it off until he can have unlimited time with you. 


R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Normally, Jooheon is pretty tamed, he’s not too big in trying a bunch of things, he’s not into toys, or elaborate role playing, or sneaking off to have sex in a McDonald’s bathroom. He’s pretty private, and he’s pretty classic, almost vanilla, not that that’s anything bad. The most he toys around with is usually positions, that’s something he likes to play around with a lot, seeing how you react to this position vs that position, etc. But besides that, Jooheon’s pretty hesitant. If you want to try it, you’ll have to bring it up, and discuss it, because he’s not going to. 

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Jooheon’s good at keeping himself contained, he’s not overly hormonal, and he’s a pretty tentative lover. He knows his limits, what makes him and his partner tick, so he’s good at making sex last longer than usual because he knows his body. His stamina is really solid, if he plays his cards right, Jooheon can stretch sex out anywhere from fifteen minutes to over half an hour, but one rounds is his limit. Stretching sex out for so long really wears him thin, and once is all he can handle. 

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
He’s not so much a fan of toys, Jooheon’s thing is that he likes having you fall apart from his touch alone, not from any rubber toy that he could get. He likes feeling you clutch his arms, and your warm hands grasping at his back, so unless you propose it, toys/restraints aren’t something he’s really interested in. 


U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Jooheon’s a bit of a tease, just because he likes hearing you whimper and beg. He certainly goes down on you longer than necessary just because of that. But he doesn’t draw it out too long, he likes to tease and make you beg but Jooheon is usually eager to be inside you, rather than just tongue fuck you into next week. 

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Jooheon is more on the quiet side, he’s not overly loud or makes a lot of noise. Typically it’s just him whispering “fuck, you’re so good for me baby” “so warm, takin me so well” and small grunts and moans from working your body. He’s vocal, and makes his pleasure known, he’s just not very loud when he does. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

The poor boy had a heart attack and a half the first time you whimpered the safe word, in the middle of some pretty intense sex. Nothing too serious, just being bent like a pretzel doesn’t feel all that comfortable. But the immediate thought that he’d hurt you smacked Jooheon in the face and halted completely. He was apologizing a mile a minute, frantically looking you over for what he’d done, close to having a full blown melt down. Calming him down with explaining that ‘dude, you got my leg twisted this way, i got a cramp, im not dying’, but it took quite a bit of coaxing to convince him you were fine before he would continue. ‘you sure you’re fine? what if you pulled a muscle? should we go to the hospital?” ‘yeah sure let’s go, and be on the next episode of sex sent me to the er. im fine

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Jooheon’s what Nana calls a hotdog boy. Pretty average length, 5-5.2″ but rather slender, not much girth under his belt.  

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
He toes on the average line, he’s clingy and eager to play. But it’s not overbearing, he’s pretty contained the majority of the time. Not much out of the ordinary for a grown man really. 


Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
After sex, Jooheon is fairly relaxed, all the stress and pent up energy is drained and he’s on cloud 9. He doesn’t slip off to dream land too quick, usually cuddling and pillow talk last a good while and he falls asleep afterwards. So typically, anywhere after half an hour and Jooheon’s out like a light. 

Tarot Reading At Events

Tarot Reading At Events

Before I begin, I encourage everyone to please read the disclaimer at the bottom of this post. Being a Tarot reader who does a significant amount of reading events at festivals, conventions, fairs, and private parties, I thought I would share some insight on things I wish I knew when I first started reading Tarot at events.

Before The Event 

Because each event and situation is different, the preparation can vary but here are some things that I take into account before an event.

Legal:
Some events require a business license, proof of tax id, a merchant’s license and or an entertainers license. Some do not.

Event and Vendor Contracts:
It is important to always look over everything before signing. If there is something that is confusing or you need anything clarified, ask up to two reputable people to explain it just to be sure. If you are providing your own contract for a private event it is always good to include things like payment, cancellation policies, allotted space provided, if you need to provide your own furniture, force majeure, parking policy, etc. I always like to ask about alcohol being served to be able to prepare myself for people who may be under the influence. I ask about smoking and loud noise to help determine if those are conditions I’d be able to do readings under.

  • Is alcohol being served at this event?
  • Will smoking be permitted on the premises?
  • Will there be a smoking designated areas?
  • Will my table or space be located near the designated smoking area?
  • Will my table or space be located near speaker systems, live entertainment, etc?

Travel Expenses:
Something that I didn’t take into account when I first started reading for events are travel, gas and lodging expenses. For private events, I like to include this expense in the contract. For public conventions and festivals, I like to keep this in mind in my event budget.

Getting Paid:

It is always good to know before committing to an event how you will be paid. Some of the more common practices that I have experienced are:

  • The event holder prepays a deposit (usually half the agreed upon rate) for X amount of hours or X amount of readings. The remaining rate is paid for once the event is completed.
  • Paid per reading. The event holder takes a percentage of the amount of money made for each reading and other misc services.
  • You keep all revenue made but prepay for your space or table fee beforehand.

Fees:
For events like conventions and fairs, there are usually booth, space and table fees. You may also have to pay an event ticket fee.  There are also usually premium spaces, premium corner spaces and multiple space rentals for higher rates that receive significantly more foot traffic. If you are reading at a private venue like a corporate event hall, bridal shower or private celebration, depending on the event holder, there aren’t usually table or space rental fees but sometimes there are so it is always best to ask beforehand.

Accepting Payment:
Knowing how and what ways you are going to accept payment for your readings is important to track not only your earnings but makes it easy to pay for any fees accumulated as mentioned before. Cash is usually always ideal but having the ability to accept credit card and even electronic payments is a fabulous addition to your public reading arsenal. Some of the common services that I have used to be paid at events are SquareUp, Google Wallet, ApplePay, Paypal, Venmo, etc. One thing to keep in mind when accepting payments is to take account your local tax laws. Some of these mobile payment applications allow you to apply taxes before checkout. If you are only accepting cash, having a calculator handy would prove beneficial.

What To Bring With You

Deciding What To Bring:
Because events vary significantly depending on venue, event holder and local laws it is important to make sure that you are aware of what you can and can’t bring. Referring back to your contract, you should be able to get an idea of what is allowed.
Some venues provide a set of table and chairs, while others do not. Certain venues allow candles and incense, others do not. If your venue does allow candles and incense to be burned it is always good to be mindful of those with scent sensitivities.

Bringing A Helper:
I always like to bring one friend to help me during events. Having a friend who can help you set up,  watch your booth or table during your breaks or set up the list of names for the reading sign up sheet is an invaluable asset to have.

Decks And Tools To Bring:
This is completely up to you and dependent on your preferences, reading style and the type of readings you are going to offer. I know of some readers who prefer to only use one deck. It is all up to you. Something that I have found to help me especially when reading outdoors is to keep small polished stones near me to place on top of cards so that they do not fly away before or in the middle of a reading.

Common Things To Bring With You:
This is not an exhaustive list by far nor is it something you must follow exactly. These are just some things I like to bring with me that you might want to consider as well. It is important to factor in the cost of these things before an event.

  • Portable Canopy or Pop up tent (If it is permitted and you have the adequate space)
  • Table and Chairs (If not provided)
  • I like to bring a set of four chairs. Three for clients and one for myself.
  • Seat cushions and or back cushion.
  • Table cloth and weights to keep cloth down. I like to use crystals.
  • Rain cover for tent or canopy
  • Small first aid kit 
  • Crystals or polished stones to act as small weights so cards don’t fly away if reading outdoors
  • Tip Jar
  • A few portable light sources if reading through the evening hours at an outside venue
  • Medicine that you need to take.
  • Scent free hand sanitizer.
  • Scent Free bug spray (If outdoors).
  • Sunscreen (If outdoors)
  • Tissues
  • Mints
  • Promotional signs for around event space.
  • Cooler of water bottles with ice packs
  • Cashbox
  • Portable fan
  • Phone battery backup
  • Mobile Tablet and battery backup (I utilize it as a portable point of sales device)
  • A copy of your code of ethics
  • A reading waiting list

Customizing Your Event Space:
Because each event and Tarot reader is different, customizing your event space is entirely up you, as long as it abides by the venue or event holders rules. I’ve created luxurious spaces filled with twinkle lights and scarves and other times I’ve kept my space minimalistic and simple with just a table, a set of chairs and a few signs. It is all up to you to decide what look you are going for. There is no right or wrong way to set up your event space.

Some Easy Ways To Customize Your Space:

  • Tent banner and table banner with logo and website URL
  • Crystal/Salt Lamps (electric or candle holder based)
  • Candles (electric or wax based)
  • Scarves
  • Tapestries
  • Twinkle Lights
  • Flags
  • Wind Chimes
  • Bells
  • Fabric Pannels
  • Pillows
  • Baskets
  • Lanterns
  • Faux walls with art

Promotional And Marketing Tools:
Events are a fabulous way to showcase your reading services, website and social media accounts to prospective clients. Some of the common ways that you could market yourself would be:

  • Business card holder and supplying business cards before or after readings.
  • Raffles for a paid reading or service
  • Promotional brochures about you and your readings.
  • Stickers with your logo
  • Table Tents
  • Buttons or pins
  • Flyers to your website or online shop.
  • Promotional post cards with coupon codes for new clients
  • E-mail list sign up form
  • Digital Light Box or Marquee Sign
  • Sale sheets

The Day Of The Event

Being Mindful Of Your Health:
It is important to listen to your body. Do not overwork yourself. Stay hydrated and fed. I use up a lot of spoons (energy) during reading marathon sessions. I like to have a plan of action if I have depleted my energy reserves drastically before the event. Ensure that you take breaks, walk around for a bit, use the restroom and take any medicine that you may need. If you are working outdoors, periodically applying on sunscreen and bug spray is also beneficial. Another thing that I like to do is keep a misting fan with cold water to mist myself during, especially hot and humid events. For events during cooler months, I like to keep a large comfy sweater or jacket and a scarf in my possession. For those who subscribe to the belief in creating sacred spaces, grounding and centering, and shielding your energy, these things might be beneficial for you to do before you start reading at the event.

Be Mindful Of Mean-Spirited And Unsafe People:
Sometimes you will encounter people who are skeptics or other readers who may want to show you their level of expertise and importance by making you feel less than. Remember that you are awesome and that you are worth all the hard work and dedication it took you to book this event. You are talented and do not deserve to be mistreated. Another thing to be mindful of is if your event is serving alcohol. If you are ever in a situation where someone can possibly be violent or harmful to you, themselves or others around them, knowing who to call or where the nearest authority is located is strongly beneficial before the event.

Reading Rates
There are various ways to price your services for an event. If you aren’t being prepaid or have made prior payment arrangements by the event coordinator or a private company beforehand.  Your rates are completely up to you. Some common ways to determine your reading rate are:

  • Setting a base reading rate depending on divination type. (Tarot Vs Pendulum)
  • Setting a base reading rate by tarot spread.
  • Setting a base reading rate by amount of cards pulled.
  • Setting a base reading rate by designated time breakdown.
  • Setting a base reading rate by the energy needed to perform the different type of reading. (Tarot Reading Vs Mediumship Session)

Before Reading For Others:
I think it is important to keep an open mind when reading for others and to set safe boundaries for yourself. I also think its important for readings to be done in a respectful and comfortable way for both parties involved. Before I begin any reading I like to designate a few moments to either share a copy of my ethics of my prospective client or give them a short rundown of my ethics, ask for their preferred pronouns and provide my preferred pronouns to them as well. I also listen attentively to any questions or concerns the client may have before the reading. I also make an effort to ensure that my readings are accessible to everyone so I also ask if there is any way they would prefer the reading performed that is nonverbal. I do my very best to accommodate this.

Calming Nervousness:
It can be intimidating reading for others in person. Something that I like to do is introduce myself casually to prospective clients walking by. I like to smile, start a little small talk and talk a little bit about the event and who I am. This gets the good vibes going for me and helps to ease my nervousness. Before reading I like to shuffle my cards a few times to “shuffle out” any of my nervousness.

After Reading For Others:
After the allotted time for the reading has passed or you have wrapped up the reading in its entirety, it is important to thank the client and let them know that the reading session has now ended. Being kind and firm will allow you to be accountable of your timing and also keep your reading wait list from becoming too much to handle.

After The Event:
Something that I like to do before packing up and leaving is thank the event coordinator and offer a complimentary reading if they have not received one already. I clean up my space and leave. For the next week after the event, I practice lots of self-care and do what I can to help replenish my energy levels. If you subscribe to the belief of cleansing and recharging your tarot decks and or energy this week would possibly be a good time do so. I also like to take the time to write down the things I believe I could improve for next time or the next events and the things I was proud of achieving.

Misc Tips:
These tips which were graciously added with the permission of @tarotwithjeff and @corvinnia. Thank you so much!

  • Having a small clock that can be placed where both you and the client can see it.
  • A small toolkit. At the very least I take a multi-tool, a flashlight, scissors, and duct tape.
  • If you’re at a venue with access to electricity, plan accordingly. Is there a wall outlet near your space, or do you have one of those outlet boxes used at large event venues such as convention centers? Do you need to bring an extension cord and/or power strip/surge suppressor?
  • Healthy snacks!!! Especially for long events.
  • If it’s an outdoor event, take a wide-brimmed hat in addition to sunscreen.
  • Some sort of rolling crate, cart, etc. to help with schlepping stuff from your vehicle to your space at the event. This can be even more important when you’re dependent on public transportation.
  • Keep a checklist so you know what should be packed before you leave for the event, and to make sure you don’t leave anything behind after the event.
  • Have a fast pack battle plan ready for weather related situations. (Think if I need to be moved quickly how would I do that.) 
  • Rubbermaid type tubs with lids and folding dolly or hand cart can be life savers. 

The End:
I know. I know. FINALLY. This post was SO LONG. After all is said and done, being a Tarot reader at an event can be a lucrative way to market yourself, meet new and like-minded people and make great income. It is lots of hard work and dedication but it is one of the most worthwhile experiences I’ve ever done as a Tarot reader. It is my greatest hope that this article has helped you in some way.


Post Notes:
Please do not remove the captions.
Title: Tarot Reading At Events
Copyright:  © Ivan Ambrose 2017
Disclaimer: This post in no way, shape, or form is intended to tell you how you must go about being a Tarot reader at an event or to police you on what to bring to such events. The intention of this post is to share my experiences with reading Tarot at events. This isn’t the only way, the absolute right way or the way that you “should” approach this topic. No event, venue or two tarot readers are alike. This is the way that I choose to do things and how events and reading venues are in my area. Your local events and venues may do things differently.  I can only speak from personal experience and what has worked for me for countless years. I encourage you to do your own research, to do what you are comfortable with and to tailor any advice provided henceforth to your specific needs and individual situation. Also please keep in mind that there are various different rules, regulations, and laws that precede your location, state, country and the event and tarot reading guidelines in your area that can and will differ from those in my location. I encourage and open up this conversation to respectful debate and added commentary to supplement this post of any kind. 
Safe Space Tags: Long Post
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anonymous asked:

Yes, Dee, you really should be working. Bet your horses and their owners miss you when you spend all day on here. Why don't you be a regular fan & stop spreading lies & conspiracy theories about Sam & Cait. Wonder what the uni would think of Professor McD's wife being such an obsessed out of touch with reality fanatic. And it would really be embarrassing for K to know that her mother is considered an Outlander tinhatter. Light shipping with no conspiracy theories spread is the way to go, Dee.

Awww, anon, am I spending too much time on Tumblr for your tastes? Debunking too many of your sacred, but not very well supported opinions? Sorry about that- but what I choose to do with the publicly available information that is available to me is my prerogative, as also is how I spend my free time. That’s the time when I am not working. My tag line is a bit of humour, anon, not to be taken seriously. All the work gets done and then some, anon, never worry about that!
And speaking of publicly available information, I see that you have also availed yourself of some and done some poking about as to me and my family. No problem as far as I am concerned, or my family either. It is, after all, publicly available information and you are quite welcome to it. But you leave me at something of a social disadvantage, anon, in that you presume to address me on a first name basis- but, as you have chosen to remain anonymous-I don’t yet have your name to reciprocate properly with our first name basis communications. Oh, well, I suppose there is nothing for it but to just go on addressing you as “anon” until you see fit to introduce yourself.
But I suppose I should now get down to answering your questions. Since you have troubled yourself to learn so much about me it’s the least I can do to reciprocate your interest!

First, my clients are all quite aware of my blog, and of its direction. In fact we often laugh about the absurdities of social media, and the proclivities of certain of its users to take it upon themselves to tell others how they should think. ( that’s a polite way to say “NSTer, anon)

And then there is my husband, who as you point out, anon, is indeed a professor. He was a little miffed to learn about your interest in him, anon, but only because your research seems to have failed to turn up, and refer to him by, his actual job title. He is actually a Distinguished Professor- which means he holds an endowed chair, anon, which means he is a very important part of his department, he teaches the advanced courses, sits on important committees, oh, and he also has tenure. Which means that it doesn’t really matter to him, or to his uni, what sort of things his wife might choose to do with her spare time. Even if that thing is to be an “obsessed out of touch with reality fanatic” lol! He is also well aware of my blog, and it’s content. In fact we both get a really good laugh together most mornings when he shares with me the latest political news a la Trump and friends, and I fill him in on the latest fandom happenings (that’s also a polite way to say “NSTer happenings, anon)

And then there is my lovely daughter, anon. I am so glad you didn’t leave her out of this as I am always happy to talk about her- that’s what parents love to do! She’s also well aware of my blog, and it’s content as well, anon. In fact she was the one who got me started in Tumblr. She ran a fandom blog in another fandom for several years and is also well aware of ships and shipping- and how the term "tinhatter” is applied to any ship that an individual disagrees with (which is a polite way of saying “NSTer”, anon)

So now that the pleasantries are sorted, anon, let’s get down to your real reason for writing. The conspiracy thing. You advocate “light shipping” for me, but there is no such thing. Not in the dictionary, not in the Urban Dictionary, and not even on Google. It doesn’t exist as a word, or a concept. It is only a “thing” in the minds of certain bloggers. The truth is, anon, you either ship it or you don’t. No heavy or light to it.
And as to any “conspiracies” that is also a thing that comes with the territory in this fandom. The position of both sides requires there to be a “conspiracy” for their position to exist. The Sam Cait ship requires the “official” narrative of Sam and other girls to be a put on. And the Samzie ship requires the whole of the matter between Sam and Cait, as displayed by them their own selves, to be a put on. Either way someone is doing a put on, anon, it’s just a difference of opinion as to who.

When I add it up I get sam and Cait, as do my family and friends. Others get a different answer. So be it. Live and let live, and it is all public information after all. It’s not illegal, or even immoral to form opinions about it. Or to print those opinions or discussions.

And that brings me to your last point, anon. The implication that I am putting my family at risk by looking at publicly available information, and printing my opinions about it. Or that I am doing something wrong that I, or they, would not want known about.
It’s obvious that is not the case. If I was doing wrong, and if you were actually someone with the power to do something about that, then we would be having this communication via letterhead, and not via an anonymous submission to my Tumblr blog.

And maybe you should ask yourself what it is that you are really saying when you resort to threats to try to silence the words what you claim to be nothing more than an “obsessed, out of touch with reality fanatic”. If I was truly just a “tinhatter” shouldn’t it be easy to simply ignore me the same way that everyone ignores the homeless guy who stands on the busy intersection preaching loudly, every day, about the end of he world which according to him is directly upon us?
Instead you take the time out of your life to research my family and compose implicit threats- and no one likes to waste time. That tells me that my words are not meaningless. That tells me that my words are believable- and that they are believable enough to cause a threat to your worldview. And that you had no facts at hand, or even a good argument to make to refute them. No reason to need me silenced otherwise that I can see. There really isn’t a higher compliment

So thanks, anon, for taking the time out of your day so send me such a gracious compliment. My family and I send you our regards. Sorry we can’t thank you personally at this time since you are still anonymous, but perhaps in time you will feel comfortable introducing yourself. Or maybe not, since your choice to remain anonymous rather confirms the view that revealing your true identity would also be a reveal that you are in fact nobody whose opinion actually matters- or you would be using your real name and revealing that your opinion DOES matter after all. But this all is making even my eyes roll, anon, so take care of yourself, anon, whoever you are!
Until then- Cheers!

Do SDs and Clients prefer White Girls?

Question: I have a curvy figure and a pretty face but I’m black. Is it true SD’s and POTS prefer white girls?

^I accidentally deleted the original question. Whoever asked this, I’ve taken the liberty to answer my in depth observations and advice, then I realized this could be a post all on its own.

Answer: Unfortunately yes; there’s definitely heavy racism in the industry. Due to the stigma and stereotypes, it requires MOST black SBs to work harder to find POTS and clients. It does not mean it is impossible or even farfetched. It just means you will have to work harder to prove yourself different from what they’re assuming you’ll be.

Don’t get mad at the racism or assumptions. It’ll still be there whether you bitch about it or not. In fact, if you bitch about it, it’ll have an ironic effect where you’re reinforcing their belief. Instead, PROVE THEM WRONG.

I have actually found this to be a great advantage when helping black SW get into this world. I’ve asked every single client I’ve ever had why or what makes them interested in who they see….and why they avoid certain girls.

The most unanimous reason seems to be an overwhelming amount of inexperienced or naive/aspiring black SBs entering the game without research. For every poised, educated and serious black SB, there will be 5 high schoolers messaging POTS with improper English and entitled attitudes. As long as you can communicate you will not embarrass them in public and are capable of carrying INTELLIGENT conversations, you will have effectively communicated they can “get the best of both worlds”.

Black women are often portrayed by the media as “Jezebels” with superior figures and sex drive. PLAY THIS TO YOUR ADVANTAGE. Big difference between sexy and trashy though. Think Halle Berry, not Nicki Minaj.

I’ve been having many black SBs ask me to review their profiles and ads lately. I’ve noticed a few patterned errors many make due to inexperience. Let’s start with photos-

•Have at least one or two HIGH-QUALITY photos of you in an elegant evening-wear outfit. I’d advise wearing white or a color that would pop on your skin and dainty jewelry. Have somebody take “candid” photos of you in a pretty setting in natural lighting. By doing this, you’re effectively removing any doubt you will not blend in high society.

•If you have a straight smile, have a headshot in casual clothing with your hair done and flirty makeup. A white, straight smile will pop beautifully against your skin. I’ve always noticed a beautiful black person’s smile over a lighterskinned person. USE YOUR DIFFERENCES TO YOUR ADVANTAGE. If you’re not comfortable showing your face, softly blur the rest of your face but not your smile.

•Have one photo that is sexy, not trashy. An outfit that shows off the shape of your figure and reveals ONE physical asset. Show off that black figure. Work with what you have. It is crucial this photo doesn’t come off trashy. No open legged or twerking shots, ladies. 😓😓

Content
•Fix all grammatical errors. If your profile is littered with uncapitalized sentences, spelling errors or this shit !!! <—incorrect use of punctuation; upscale clients will not take you seriously. They’re much more likely to trick you into few times screw then ditch you. Think LONGTERM.
•If you’re young enough, lie you’re in school even if you’re not. This will give you leverage as being educated, and down the line, it’ll give you leverage to finesse more money out of him. This applies to any and all races.
•Be pleasant. Do not give them any leverage with the whole “neckroll attitude” image of you. If they disrespect you, then by all means, go for it. But keep in mind, nobody owes you anything. This is a business, customer service is key.
•Do not fucking get desperate. Some of these men will say some fucked up racist shit to convince you you’re only worth $150ppm (big city). Decline politely, and tell them your last SD had no problem with your desired rate. Move on.

Finally, start doing your research on CLOTHES AND MAKEUP. I completely understand you’re young and not use to this certain lifestyle yet. You do NOT need to be spending bundles on clothes but you do need to have pieces that will flatter and allow you to blend in with the clientele you’re aiming to attract. Learn to walk more gracefully in heels. A few key elegant pieces of jewelry. Never look sloppy in the presence of a POT, SD or Client.

Lastly, I know a lot of SBs come into this industry because of their struggling financial background. I definitely know what that’s like. But the point is, you need to finesse and better yourself to the point you can fool these MILLIONAIRES into thinking you belong with them. I might get a lot of hate or perceived racism but the truth is that you need to fit into their IDEAL life for them to WANT you in their life. What effort you put in, is what you’ll get out.

VERY, VERY rarely do you ever see a man in a crisp Armani suit with a ghetto or trashy girl with unkempt hair and obnoxious speech (regardless of race) on their arm for long. This is a job. Dress and act for the job you want.

Remember, there are FAR more reserved business men than there are rappers, athletes or “Hugh Hefners”. Aim to cast your net wide for a higher chance of landing a whale. There’s a reason why there are far more generically attractive/charismatic people who are successful. They appeal to more opportunities. In this case, opportunities mean POTS, SDs or clients.

Hustle smarter.

Now go and get that money! 💸💸💸

But please be safe.

Note: Like all of my posts, my advice is strictly derived from my own personal experiences and observations. I will not shy away from the hard truths of this industry which includes racism, sexism, abuse, and trauma. I prefer to be honest in what I see and know, and use it as an advantage to help girls who reach out to me. I am not any wiser than any other SW veteran. How you interpret and value my advice is entirely up to you. It is not the responsibility of me or my blog to assure you I’m not a racist, sexist, misogynist or whatever the fuck else. I can only promise I will do my best to help as many girls (of age) who reach out to me, and guide them towards a more upscale clientele and SAFETY. If you cannot handle brutal truths or opinions, get the fuck off my blog and out of this industry.

anonymous asked:

I interpret thus: When Dean says "we" it seems like he means "we = Dean, Sam, Cas" but actually it's "we = Dean and Cas". Similarly when Cas says "you" it seems like he means "you = Dean and Sam" but actually it's "you = just Dean". There's a miscommunication going on, between Dean and Cas, and between them and the audience. Different layers of meaning. The mixtape scene is a great example of this, and the argument they had just beforehand. I encourage you to watch again and interpret both ways.

Follow up: “we” can also be “us / our.” Also Dean sometimes uses “we” to mean “we = just me, Dean”. Such as the argument in 12.19 where Dean is upset with Cas but tries to make it seems like “Dean and Sam are upset with Cas” when really Dean is talking about himself and his own feelings. Quote: “Not only were you ditching *us* but you were also ignoring *us*.” In context, clearly, Dean is talking about himself - “we = just Dean, not including Sam”. Later on: “*we* were worried, that’s not ok.”

Add-on (because I’m re-watching and I can’t switch off): Cas during the mixtape scene, where ‘you’ is read as ’= Dean and Sam’ but likely ’= just Dean.’ Quote: “I didn’t mean to add to *your* distress. […] When *you* were taken I searched for months and I couldn’t find *you*. […] I needed to come back here with a win for *you*.” Followed by Dean saying “me and Sam we had her” so 'we = Dean and Sam’ and Cas switches back to 'you = Dean and Sam’ “And if you find her again?”

Final ask, I promise: I’m just saying for particularly the mixtape scene there’s always a clear distinction made when “we” or “us” or “you” is meant to include Sam, and when it is not. The times when it is not clear are, in my opinion, when Sam is not meant to be included - at least not in a strong way. “I couldn’t find you” - yes Dean AND Sam were missing and Cas was looking for them both, but it’s also meant to be addressed JUST to Dean here. The talk later start notably including Sam. (End.)

Hey! Yes this is a very frustrating thing in this show. Because there are several ways to interpret everything that the characters say. This is why you end up with MASSIVE debates over a simple sentence such as Cas’s love confession in 12x12 and exactly the reason why my tag for that debate is ambiguous love confessions. This show loves its ambiguity because it wants to keep all sides of the audience (though by sides I really mean destiel shippers versus people who would rage quite if it went canon) happy. (Personally I think the show should stick a middle finger up at those who would rage quit over something like Destiel but that’s just me)

This is also an excellent example of why English as a language generally sucks. Other languages have different words for ‘you, we, us, etc’ depending on the meaning. I imagine that translators for subtitles and things must have a hell of a time trying to figure it all out. (I guess that means the translation would entirely depend on whether the specific translator watched the show through a destiel lens with a knowledge of subtext or whether they were just as dense and heteronormative as the rest of the GA.

Anyway, it is as you rightly say, something Dean does a lot. He sublimates his own feelings onto Sam, grouping them together so he isn’t left vulnerable.

11x23 was a great example of where this became SUPER annoying:

You’re the best friend we’ve ever had.

You’re our brother, Cas. I want you to know that.

Textually, Dean is talking ABOUT him AND Sam, but subtextually, through an understanding of the shows history and Dean’s behaviour, it is clear that Dean is actually talking about himself. This exact line was said specifically TO Dean by Bobby in Season 7 after all “You just lost the best friend you ever had”. Whilst I would never want to understate Cas and Sam’s relationship, Cas has always meant more to Dean than Sam and that in itself is evident by the fact that it wasn’t SAM who made an excuse to drag Cas along on a made up beer run so he could talk privately with him about his feelings.

Enter season 12 and every freaking episode is bringing to light just how very different the feelings between Dean and Sam for Cas actually are (season 11 also did this, most obviously in 11x18 but yet we still had that useless little talk in 11x23 which gave us hardly anything *sigh).

I think the moments that you refer to specifically are in 12x19. But they also apply heavily to one specifically memorable scene in 12x12. Both episodes are vitally important to understand how Dean and Cas view each other compared to how they view others.

In 12x12 we get this glorious speech:

DEAN: Cas, come on.

CASTIEL: (talking to Dean) No, you listen to me. You–

(looks around to address everyone) Look, thank you. Thank you.

(looks from Dean to Sam throughout) Knowing you, it… it’s been the best part of my life. And the things that… the things we’ve shared together, they have changed me.

(reaction shot from Mary looking at the boys)

(reaction shot first of Dean, then of Sam – evidence that what Cas just said meant BOTH of them)

You’re my family.

(Cas looks from Dean, to Sam, to Mary)

I love you.

(Cas looks down)

(reaction shot from Dean)

I love all of you.

(Reaction shot and zoom in on Dean and then Sam)

Just please… please, don’t make my last moments be spent watching you die.

(again Cas looks at both Sam and Dean at this point)

Just run. Save yourselves. And I will hold Ramiel off as long as I can.

Following the pattern of eye contact, its pretty clear who he is addressing at each point, except for one point, when he looks down.

Therefore we have to go by reaction shots. Early in the scene the reaction shots are used to establish WHO Cas is talking to at any specific moment. After he looks down, we ONLY get a reaction shot from Dean.

Therefore logically, he is talking to Dean and Dean only when he says “I love you”.

Also we can argue that the emotional weight behind telling ONE person “I love you” romantically, compared to telling several people “I love you” platonically is the reason that Cas averts his eyes at that specific moment. A platonic “I love you” would not cause a person to avert their eyes.

However in the context of the whole scene, many people would argue that is not the case as the majority of other “You’s” refer to more than one person.

This is a perfect example of ambiguity in a scene specifically crafted as such. Frustrating I know.

Let’s look at the next scene that comes a few episodes later (but interestingly enough the next episode specifically devoted and referred to by TPTB as a ‘Cas’ episode, meaning that they wanted the audience to link 12x12 and 12x19 in their minds).

12x19 uses this language ambiguity a lot, but not to mislead the audience, instead like in 11x23, it is used BY Dean to sublimate his own emotions and thoughts on the situation onto his brother, and its pretty obvious that he’s doing it:

Dean: Let me rephrase that for Sam. Where the hell have you been? And why have you ignored our phone calls?

This is the first time where DEAN as a character is purposely trying to bring Sam in to HIS argument. We have seen Cas’s phone, we know all his missed calls were from Dean and Dean only.

Castiel: I was in Heaven. I was working with the angels. When I saw Dagon had captured Kelly, I-I thought they could help.

Sam: And?

Castiel: Nothing.

Sam: Well, at least you’re back. We’re glad you’re back.

Dean: Really? No, I’m sorry. Okay, 'cause while you were striking out in Heaven, we had a shot at Dagon, and we lost.

Castiel: I know. I received your messages.

Dean: Oh, you did – you did receive the messages? Okay, that’s good.

Castiel: Dean.

Dean: So not only were you ditching us, but you were also ignoring us? That’s great. 'Cause we really could’ve used the backup. But, uh, you were too busy with, um What was it? Nothing?

Whats interesting about this exchange is how Sam does it as well. He tries to speak for both him and Dean but Dean immediately contradicts him. Which proves that all of Dean’s “Us’s” and “”we’s “ to follow actually just mean him. Sam isn’t overly emotional and upset about the situation. He is more interested in finding out what Cas actually did. As you stated above, the majority of ‘we’s and us’s’ from Dean here actually just mean him.

Then in the now infamous mixtape scene we get this exchange:

Castiel: Sorry, Dean. Um I just wanted to return this.

(hands Dean a mixtape)

Dean: It’s a gift. You keep those.

Castiel: Oh.

Dean: Cas, you can’t – With everything that’s going on, you can’t just go dark like that. We didn’t know what happened to you. We were worried. That’s not okay.

The first thing to note here is that this is just Dean repeating to Cas what he already told him back in 12x10 (the last Cas episode and therefore also supposed to stand out in the audiences minds here). The audience has seen the last few episodes whilst Cas has been missing. We all know how Sam reacted to the whole thing – by consoling Dean as per usual. It was only Dean who was really worried. When Dean says here *we* were worried, he means *I* was worried – just like he already admitted to Cas in 12x10. The difference in these two moments is the intimacy of this scene. Hence Dean is most likely slightly uncomfortable and aware that his heart is suddenly out on his sleeve and vulnerable and he’s already been burned by Cas’s abandonment so he uses the plural words instead.

Castiel: Well, I didn’t mean to add to your distress. I – Dean, I just keep failing. Again and again. When you were taken, I searched for months and I couldn’t find you. And then Kelly escaped on my watch, and I couldn’t find her. And I just wanted I needed to come back here with a win for you. For myself.

Unlike with Dean, Cas’s words are far less easy to interpret. The audience already knows that Dean means that HE was worried and not Sam, but we don’t really know whether Cas means just Dean, or Dean AND Sam at this point. Just like with the 12x12 love confession, Cas’s ambiguity is far more difficult to interpret. Both Dean and Sam were taken as you say, so Cas most likely means both of them. But Cas isn’t addressing Dean and Sam right now. When he says he wanted a win for *you* it is only knowing their background and correctly interpreting the intimacy of the scene (following the mixtape moment elevates this even more) that logically, that final *you* at least, means just Dean.

Dean: You think you’re the only one rolling snake eyes here? Me and Sam, we had her. We had Kelly and we lost her.

Castiel: And if you find her again?

Dean: Sam’s working on it. Of course, he’s hell-bent on finding something that doesn’t mean killing her or her kid.

Castiel: Right. And if he doesn’t find something? If you run out of time, could either of you kill an innocent?

Here the plural form of the words is clearly given. Cas clarifies this time with *either of you* which further enhances the singular form of *you* in his previous line (just like in the 12x12 love confession).

Dean: We will find a better way.

Castiel: (gestures to both himself and Dean) You mean, we?

Dean: Yes, dumbass. We. You, me, and Sam, we’re just better together. So now that you’re back, let’s go, Team Free Will. Let’s get it done.

Castiel: I’d like that.

Dean: Great. And I’d like a beer.

Finally, this moment brought into text the ambiguity itself, proof that there is INDEED a miscommunication going on between them. Castiel asks for clarification on that final *we* because he isn’t sure if he is included in Dean’s plans, Dean clarifies that he is, and confirms that the *we* means all 3 of them. This time.

That final moment is a real kicker because it proves several thing:

  • The miscommunication is real between the characters (starting in 11x23 imo) and a big problem in terms of their relationships.
  • The audience is being invited to question these ambiguous meanings, since they have now seen a character specifically question them.

  • The writers are aware of the ambiguity and are intentionally writing it that way.

Added to this that in the episode following this one, the characters even further highlight the miscommunication found using plural terms. Max and Alicia constantly squabble over her use of *we* when really she means *I* because Max doesn’t want the Winchesters to think that he is overreacting like his sister. This happens throughout 12x20 to the point where by the end of the episode, it’s pretty much drummed into our brains that when Alicia says *we* or *us* she means *I*. The writers are specifically trying to get the audience to realise this and apply it elsewhere.

It’s almost a neon sign really. 12x19 and 12x20 both go out of their way to prove a point. Words are misleading. 

But they want us to think about this. They wouldn’t have spent so long having characters question the words used if they didn’t. 

Therefore its no real leap for us to question Cas’s use of the word *you* and how he means it, since it was right there in 12x19 amongst all of Dean’s *we’s* that mean *I’s* and so on… 

It may not be a clear distinction in either his *i wanted a win for you* in 12x19, or his *i love you* in 12x12, but the comparison is there, and made clearer by both Dean and then Alicia’s insistence in using plural words to group in other people where they really mean the singular form. 

If we are being told to watch out for it, then we damn well will watch out for it, and Cas’s “I love you” was not for the group- plural. It was for Dean. Just like so many other times he has said *you* and meant Dean and only Dean when other people are around. This is what Cas has been doing for years but it is only now that we are specifically given hints in the text to look out for this ambiguity and actually question it. So keep questioning it, and hopefully it won’t remain ambiguous for too much longer.

Slow Burn - Part 1

Summary: The reader is reluctantly setup on a blind date and it doesn’t go as planned. Is there an instant spark or is it a slow burn?

Pairing: firefighter!Dean x Reader

Word Count: 1,995


Ding dong!

Ding dong!

“Y/N! Open up!”

Shit. You were hoping he forgot.

You lazily stroll over to your front door and pull it open, “Yes, sir? What can I do for you?” You greet dryly.

Your best friend Justin is planted in front of you with raised eyebrows, “Why aren’t you ready?” He asks annoyed.

“Ready for what?” You fake innocence as he invites himself into your home. “Oh please do come in!”

Justin shoots you a bitch face and shuffles into the kitchen, “I was hoping you’d be all ready and excited for your date. But I forgot who I was dealing with.” 

“Blind dates suck!” You declare with a whine, wrapping your pink fluffy bathrobe tight around your body.

Keep reading

Ice Breath (M)

So this is my first (Hobi) fic. I hope everyone enjoys. If this gets some attention I might make a part 2.

Pairing: College!Hoseok X Reader

Warning: Smut, slight fluff, drunk members, alcohol, house party.

Summary: Hoseok invites you over to his house for his birthday party before he leaves for Korea

Originally posted by ilsangrape

Do you ever think about how you’re feeling during certain times of the day? When you’re in the middle of doing something important, do you ever think if it’s making you happy? Or sad? Or some weird cocktail of emotions? The average person probably doesn’t, which is okay. Most things come automatically and without emotion. You don’t think about how your hands write a sentence when it’s not meant to mean anything. But there are some things, even people, that bring meaning to the simplest movements in life.

You typed out the coupon into the old fashioned cash register. It muttered out the receipt and you ripped it off the printer and handed it to the customer. Wishing them a good night you turned to finish up your closing job. You mindlessly and almost robotically cleaned. The clock ticked slower with every movement.

You sighed as you heard the door open. You went to straighten yourself up to tell this customer that you were closing soon. But what you saw brightened up your routine just a little bit. It was Hoseok, from your English class. You and Hoseok had known each other for several months now, but he had slowly become the highlight of your day. You’d forget that strange feeling when Hoseok would smile at you walking through the door.

“What are you doing here? We’re gonna close soon.” you questioned.

He sighed, bent over and out of breath, “Shit, yeah, I Know. Jin asked me to pick up some cups and some snacks.”

He straightened himself and smiled at you, “He’s throwing a party right now. I’m glad I got here in time. How do you run out of cups and chips when you know you’re going to throw a party?”

“Wrong person to ask.” You chuckled.  "I don’t party. You better hurry, you have two minutes until close.“

You pointed to the clock. 9:58pm. As quickly as he saw the time he bolted back into the aisles and frantically grabbed whatever he could and sprinted back to your counter. He landed in front of you with a sharp skkrt and dropped the party supplies in front of you. He chuckled, running his hand through his dark orange hair.

“So what’s the celebration?” you questioned.

Hoseok smiled, looking out the window and back to you. “It’s my birthday, actually.”

“And Jin is sending you to the store? He couldn’t have sent anyone else?” You laughed, shoving the several bags of chips into a plastic bag.

“Yeah I was the only person not doing anything. I don’t mind. Feels pretty good to get out of there and talk to a sober person for a couple minutes.”

You continued to close the register while listening to him. You looked back through the aisles, your coworkers had already closed up. You hoped to god that there wasn’t anyone else in the store, as you just wanted to go home and sleep.

Hoseok interrupted your thoughts, “You aren’t busy are you? I mean, ah, after you finish closing.”

You turned back up to him, pushing your arms through your coat. “No, but it is pretty late. Why? Do you want me to go back with you?”

“I, uh, I mean…yeah!! I mean if you want to. There’s cake.” He rubbed the back of his head, looking back up to you.

“I dunno Hoseok, it’s pretty late.”

“Oh c'mon it’s a Friday night…and it’s my birthday. Please?” He looked up to you with his sunshine filled smile, pleading for a response.

You rolled your eyes. Why not? Its not like you had anything else better to do. Although Netflix and tea sounded so much more comforting, you hadn’t gone to an actual party in ages. You didn’t like partying, but you didn’t hate it. You just hated the aftermath. Watching people throw up the contents of the night didn’t really sit well with you. You smirked at Hoseok’s smiling face.

“Alright fine, but do you mind driving me back to my place first to change? This isn’t exactly party attire.” You looked down at your navy blue store polo.

“Absolutely. C'mon.”

These were the moments that filled your life with meaning.

________

You unlocked your apartment door and dropped you purse and jacket at the door. Hoseok followed, stopping just in front of the door.

“Gimme like five minutes.” you said, heading straight to your bedroom.

You looked through your closet, picking up a knitted burgundy sweater-dress and throwing it over your body. You brushed through you hair and applied some extra mascara. Coming back out, you slipped on your knee high leather boots, almost tripping.

Hoseok giggled softly, “You look great..”

“Yeah, sure. Is it actually your birthday tonight?”

“Nah its actually the 18th. I’m just leaving before then so the boys wanted to see me before I’m off. It’s also a going away party of sorts.”

Stepping past him and giving him a strange look. You opened the door and held it open for him to step out. Locking it, you looked up at him, “Where are you off to in the middle of February?”

He chuckled. “I’m visiting Korea for a few weeks. I have some family back there that want to see me for my birthday.”

“You should like, totally bring me back a souvenir.” you said slyly.

He chuckled. “I’ll take note.”

You two walked from your front door and he opened the door to his car for you. The drive was quiet and peaceful, yet some twang of nervousness sat in your stomach. You were about to party with Hoseok. What does that even mean??

Hoseok turned to you, stopping the car in front of the house. “You aren’t nervous are you?”

Before you had the chance to say anything, Hoseok pulled you close, his hand behind your neck. He was millimeters away from you. You held your breath as you looked up to him.

“Don’t be. I’ll be with you the whole time. I dragged you into this, just let me know if you want to leave.”

Hoseok released you and you coughed out your breath. As you got out of the car, Hoseok grabbed your hand and walked you into the house. It was filled with smoke and the smell of alcohol. Smooth RnB played throughout the house. Hoseok turned to look at you swiftly while pulling you through the house. The two of you maneuvered through the crowd of people and ended up in the kitchen.

Hoseok began to prepare his own drink while Jungkook and Jimin waltzed through the maze of people up to Hoseok.  They both grabbed each shoulder, startling him.

“H-Hey guys!! I got more cups.” Hoseok said to the two other boys, both of which were also in your English class.

“Thanks man, my cup’s looking pretty beat up. Remind me not to dance and drink again.” Jungkook stated. The three laughed at his pitiful cup.

The three turned back to you. “Can I make you anything, Y/N?”

“I’ll just take whatever you’re having, Hoseok” you replied. You normally didn’t drink, but you need a little something to calm your nerves. Who knows? Maybe you’ll end up dancing with Hoseok to some raunchy song.

After concocting some vodka drink, Hoseok hooked his arm around your waist and walked you to the living room. He sat you next to the fireplace, Jimin an Jungkook following you. Three others were sitting around the room, all of which you hadn’t recognized.

You looked back at Hoseok, one arm around you, the other holing his red solo cup mixer. Where did he get this confidence? Why weren’t you stopping this? Somehow, it felt comfortable.

Hoseok must have sensed your confusion. Making his signature surprised face, he realized he needed to introduce you. “Everyone, this is Y/N. She’s in my English class..”

A sandy haired boy piped up almost immediately, speaking in a slurred and lazy tone.

“THE Y/N? The English Y/N?? This is her? Man Hobi you werent kidding.” He sat back, smugging.

“Yoongi…” Hoseok sighed.

“Wait..” you said, looking up at Hoseok, “You talk about me?”

“I can see why. She really is as cute as you say she is.” another said, with a deeper, honey-like voice.

You smirked. Hoseok liked you, no wonder he asked you to come tonight. You took a sip, sinking back into Hoseok’s arm around you. He laughed nervously, also taking a sip of his drink.

“I guess I should introduce them as well, since they all know you already. That’s Yoongi. That’s Taehyung. And that’s Namjoon.”

You waved at the three, finishing your drink. You sat the empty cup next to you, finding how the alcohol had relaxed you enough to feel comfortable in Hoseok’s embrace. You laid your head back on his arm behind you, glancing at the fireplace. The boys were lost in their conversation as you lost yourself in the flames. You could hear the muffled bounce of the music throughout the house. It was slow and rhythmic. These moments, you remembered. Comfortable and relaxing. Forgetting the world around you. Remembering the feeling.

Until Hoseok brought you back.

He moved his arm from your back to your thigh. “Can I get you another drink? I’m heading back to get another.”

“Oh, sure.” you said standing and fixing your dress.

The other boys eyed Hoseok as he led you through the cloud of drunks. He looked back at you, putting a finger over his lips. You followed him through the house and into the kitchen. You could hear the music much more clearly now. Hoseok began making his drink and turned around while mixing it with is finger. Slowly and to the beat, he began to dance-walk over to you. It was meant to be sexy but you giggled as he came towards you. Hoseok was caught in your laughter and giggled while he wrapped his free hand around your waist.

“C'mon, tell me that wasn’t sexy Y/N.” He teased.

You laughed, looking up at his brown eyes. Suddenly you felt yourself pulling towards him. Hoseok sat his drink down and placed his hand on the wall behind you. Leaning in, Hoseok gently kissed you. His lips were cold from the cold outside. Still, he tasted of vodka and honey. Whatever he was drinking, he mixed it well.

“I guess you found out about my little secret.” Hoseok said. You could still hear the beat of the music, so you put your arms around his shoulders and began to sway your head to the music.

“I’ll admit, I get butterflies before walking into class.” You admitted. “It’s hard not to when you have someone like you. You emit something between hope and happiness that I cant get enough of.”

He smirked. “You wanna get away from all these people?” he asked, moving his hand to your cheek.

You nodded and he grabbed your wrist.  He walked you through the crowd of drunks and up the stairs. You found yourselves in his bedroom. He swayed with you to the music playing downstairs. He leaned into kiss you again. His lips felt smooth, and warmer this time. Almost like you had sparked some fire inside him. His warmth pulled you closer into him as you continued to kiss him. Hoseok began to part your lips with his, lapping at you bottom lip.

You breathed out his name as your kiss deepened. Hoseok, with his strong arms embracing you further, picked you up and walked you to the bed. He laid you back onto the bed, breaking the kiss to look at you.

“Y/N…This is okay, right? I won’t go any further if you don’t want me to.” he asked with concern.

You shook your head, grabbing his face to kiss him again. This time you rolled your body into him, making him groan into the kiss.

You whispered to him, “Hoseok, I want you so much right now.”

Hoseok moved his hands to slide your dress off of your body and when he saw you in your black lace, he was taken to another land. In the low street lights coming through the window, you looked downright sexy. His lips attached to your collarbone and his ice cold hands roamed  your body. Smiling into your moan, you began to pull his shirt off, and he finished the job by pulling it over his shoulders. Even in the middle of the winter, Hoseok’s skin was a rich amber.

As Hoseok stood over you, you sat up and nipped at his neck. He wrapped his hands around your ass and lifted you so he could climb onto the bed with you. He slipped a finger around your underwear’s waistband and pulled it off. He began to trail kisses down your torso, down between your legs. He was kissing your inner thigh when he glared up at you.

“Tell me what you want, Y/N…” He whispered between kisses.

You moaned at the sight. All you wanted was for him to do was use his tongue on you.

You reached down, lacing your fingers in his hair, saying “Please.. eat me out..”

His lips got closer to your core and you could feel his icy breath, making you shiver. Smirking, he licked one long stripe up your core. You cursed at him, shivering again. This time it was from the pleasure. He continued to tongue your core slowly. He was licking long and slow stripes up you, driving you crazy. Hoseok knew exactly how to take you to a new world. Softly, he began to suck on your clit. At this point you were already seeing stars. Bringing you over the edge, Hoseok slipped two fingers in you. You came all over his lips and fingers, earning yourself a moan from him.  

You felt him release himself from you. Looking up, you saw Hoseok working on his belt buckle and removing his pants. His face was still shining from your wetness. He raised an eyebrow at you, silently questioning if you were ready for what was next. He leaned over you, placing himself at your entrance. You wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his shoulders.

“Hoseok…” you gasped. He pushed into you, waiting for you say something. Your silence allowed him to thrust into you once again, and then continuously. He felt so good inside you, so warm and filling. Hoseok halfway took your bra off and kneaded your breast. He was sucking red marks into your neck, moaning your name and curses and half-strung sentences.

Gasping for more, you moaned Hoseok’s name over and over again. You could feel him hitting your g spot with every thrust. You felt your heat coming, neither of you feeling any bit of cold now. The heat pulsed and overcame you in your high. Slewing out curses and remnants of Hoseok’s name, you began to notice that he was also chasing his heated high. He was grunting as he rocked the bed so hard it was hitting the wall. You two weren’t exactly quite, and now the bed hitting the wall must have brought some attention to your room. You heard a soft knock on the door.

“Give us a minute!” Hoseok yelled between grunts.

Hoseok immediately began to thrust faster and sloppier. And then you felt him release into you. Slumping over your body, Hoseok worked to catch his breath. “Fuck…” he breathed into your neck.

He pushed himself off of you and the bed. He grabbed his pants and put them on as he walked towards the door. You covered yourself with the covers, waiting for who was at the door.

Hoseok opened the door to Jin, completely drunk and looking for somewhere soft to land. Hoseok grabbed him as he fell through the door. You quickly got your underwear and dress back on and ran over to help Jin onto the bed.

“Gah…Hobi your sheets smell like sex, dude.” Jin slurred. “Did you finally get it on with Y/N?”

You nearly choked, dropping Jin onto the bed. Hoseok could barely hold back his laughter. You looked between Hoseok and Jin in utter amusement. Jin was so inebriated that he had already began to snore.

You look back at Hoseok, “What are we supposed to do now?”

“We can sleep in my parents bedroom. This big guy isn’t going anywhere anytime soon.”

Hoseok proceeded to pick you up bridal style into his parents bedroom. Laughing, you wrapped your arms around his neck. He walked you down the dark hall. You noticed that the majority of the people had left. Pushing the door open for Hoseok, he carried you into the room.

Placing you onto the bed, Hoseok looked at your dress. “Can I get you a shirt or something?”

You nodded, realizing how tired you were now. Relaxing into his parents bed, you waited for Hoseok to come back with one of his shirts. The house was silent now, the music had stopped. Hoseok came back with a shirt that was the same length as your dress. You chuckled at the size, switching out your dress for the pine scented shirt. When you pulled your head through the shirt, you found Hoseok standing at the edge of the bed.

“You think its too late to be asking you out on a date?” he asked.

You smiled at your hands in your lap. “Of course not Hobi, but lets plan it tomorrow. I’m pretty tired.”

“Right,” he smiled, climbing into bed with you. “Lets get some rest.”

The 5 elements of a Karate lesson

Still fumbling with making up lesson plans? 

I GOT YOUR BACK FRIEND

Originally posted by vgeta

Let me explain to you the 5 fundamentals of any martial arts class

  1. There needs to be a purpose
  2. Everyone needs to put work/effort in
  3. There is the necessity to learn something
  4. There needs to be fun
  5. Everyone needs to work respectfully with and towards each other

Now these things seem to be very basic. But you cannot make an intricate lesson plan if you can’t master the basic rules of a class.

Just like karate itself right?

Purpose of a class

There’s a reason that this one is listed first. You need to have a goal set so you can form your class accordingly. Not just that, but you also want to give your students a sense of purpose. That they are working towards a goal.

Ask yourself the following questions:

What is learning?

What does it mean for someone to learn something?

What is a lesson/class?

Think about it.

Originally posted by lessonsfromdisney

Thought about it?

What is learning?

To bring someone from the point of being completely ignorant, to knowledgeable.
To bring someone from the point of being unable, to able.

Which will influence one’s behaviour in a lasting manner. 

What does it mean for someone to learn something?

Learning a sport/hobby etc. is different from regular school. They chose to this themselves
It means that they find it fun. Or cool, useful, badass etc.

Learning a new skill is incredibly rewarding. You feel like you grow as a person when you have earned yourself a new skill.

What is lesson/class?

A class is a wholesome setting with boundaries which is created to achieve a certain goal/purpose. We can define a class as a collective set of learning situations, which are adapted to one another.

So now we know what a class consists off, you can determine your goal for a class. This could be to simply practice what you need to know for your exam but let’s take it one step further.

Originally posted by gameraboy

Everyone needs to put work/effort in

This means you too Sensei! You can’t just read the required techniques off the list, you need to put effort in! You can do this in various ways:

Instead of teaching a technique,  teach a principle.

Principles are a solid part of martial arts. They are the building stones to a technique. 

For instance, in a punch you have the term hikite. Sounds fancy? Maybe, but it’s the retracting arm when you punch. Suddenly it almost sounds boring. But it’s present in many many techniques! Examine the techniques you wanted to teach, establish which one require hikite the most and if there are a few on the list, think up an exercise to stimulate hikite (for instance, a special game of tag).

Training principles will help all the techniques involved.


Besides your way of teaching, think about the fact that this is sports/exercise. People come in for a good time and the feeling that they did something useful with their time after class is done. Keep them busy. There is nothing more boring than waiting. And most students aren’t thát self-disciplined that they just keep training on their own
Also, if they’re not training, there will be chatting or fighting.

Originally posted by kasugano

Get the class warmed-up. Do not break them, do not underwhelm them, a good warm-up (absolute maximum with adults I’d say is tops 30 minutes). After that, get to work right away. If you would like to do some stretching that’s fine, at the end of class.

There is the necessity to learn something

A clear goal like:

  • Improve the use of hikite
  • Make sure that with every kick the knee is properly raised
    or
  • Make sure that one works from a low centre of gravity 

These set a purpose, but you have adapt these goals accordingly to your students. If you are like me and have a varied class of levels from white to black belts, you need to be able to analyse and see the different steps one has to take to get to the top. 

If you can find the right goal for each level, you will give them a goal that they will feel like it is obtainable. No one would bother to climb if you can never get to the top.

There needs to be fun

Some people are dead serious about their training (*cough* me), but there should always be room for a little laugh, granted your martial art allows it.
Especially with children’s classes.

Create the fun by following things:

  • Do a fun warm-up.
    This is your entrance to the class. Energize people. Kids with a (karate-infused) game, adults with maybe some bagwork or teamwork.
    NOTE: I barely- if ever do ball games with children. It’s distractive.
  • Do not endlessly practice the same thing.
    With kids, one subject = absolute max. 20 minutes
    Adults, depending on the level = max. 40 minutes.
    NOTE: does not apply to serious students like me. We can do the same thing for 1,5 hours.
  • Allow different personalities to exist.
    Sounds weird? Look in a group, there are always people who react different to each other. Shy, show-off, serious, prankster, etc.
    People have to have the feeling they can be themselves, no matter how different they are.

Originally posted by zamasu

Everyone needs to work respectfully with and towards each other

Now this last point ties in with the previous one. Fun is awesome, so is harsh training, but there is no class or martial arts without respect/courtesy

Karate-do begins and ends with bowing:

一、空手道は礼に始まり礼に終る事を忘るな 

Hitotsu, karate-do wa rei ni hajimari rei ni owaru koto o wasuruna.


You, as a teacher have to be a guardian of that state of mind. Always intervene when things are done without respect.

You are the guardian of your class, your purpose,your fun and the respect!

Sanders Sides When Anxious (an analysis)

This is an analysis discussing anxiety symptoms as shown by the sides.

Logan: based off of when he figured out anxiety was gone, his behavior in anxiety’s room, and that one bit in losing my motivation where he kinda freaked out just a bit.

* talks very loud and fast and high pitched
– almost too difficult to understand. All the information is spilling out and when it gets really bad grammar kind of stops working. Right before they leave anx’s room he yells “Yerkes-Dodson” and points at the high side of the graph. He’s trying to convey ‘this is where we are,’ and basically everything Anxiety says, but he can’t because he’s too anxious. His mouth can’t keep up with his brain.

* Weird distracted 'dark’ tangents
– “tall enough to ride all the rides at Disney land unless you get decapitated riding small world” and “a snake devouring its own tail in order to satiate its hunger”, while not that dark, are apparently as dark as Thomas’ mind goes. When Logan is feeling anxious, he lets unpleasant thoughts spiral out of control.

* Movie references
– this is a weird one but after searching through all the videos I cannot find any other places where Logan makes any sort of references. I mean the closest we get is “elementary my dear – Daddy??? –no” in losing my motivation and that was half hearted and didn’t work out so well. After Anxiety disappears though he makes three. When he’s worried and Thomas isn’t listening to him he asks someone else to intervene. He seems to be having trouble getting his meaning across, so he resorts to saying “Flames, on the side of my face, seething, seeeething fire.” This is a quote from Clue (the movie based off the game). Later in Anxiety’s room, while trying to describe what Thomas is like without Anxiety, he can’t seem to make an accurate description, so he just calls Thomas a “cotton headed ninny muggins” which is from the movie Elf. Later when Patton shouts suddenly, Logan, startled, exclaims “E equals MC Scared!” Which just so happens to be the title of an epic rap battle of history. When Logan is upset and he can’t think of words he uses someone else’s. (*It should be noted that when he Patton and Roman left they imitated a song from the sound of music, but Logan didn’t initiate it and I would compare Logan’s interaction more to word association then anything else. He only said something because Roman said it first.)

He was also the first one to get eyeliner in Anxiety’s room. I think it was because he was already anxious about Anxiety not being there.

Roman: based off his behavior in Anxiety’s room and in Am I Orginial

* Loud high pitched voice and visible breathing
– he doesn’t talk fast but he gets high pitched and loud and yells a few times and sometimes you can see his shoulders moving up and down when he takes a deep breath.

* No self control
– He just says the first thing that pops into his head and does not stop. For example the creepy cookie rant. He can’t seem to find the breaks.

* Asking for reassurance
– When Patton asks about the eyeshadow Princeton says he didn’t apply it “But does it look okay? because a prince has to slay!” and after telling Virgil why he’s necessary he goes “Was that good? Did I do good?” Princey is usually telling the group how totally awesome and handsome he is. He provides these affirmations to himself most of the time. In Anxiety’s room apparently he has to ask the others instead.

* no creative insults
– he did not use a single nickname for Anxiety while in his room. Also near the end of Am I Original he said he was unable to come up with a harmful nickname for Anxiety right before having an emotional breakdown because he’s anxious about not being able to make good ideas.

Patton: based on time in anxiety’s room and the losing my motivation episode.

* He gets louder faster and more high pitched
– his speech patterns change just like Logan but not to the intensity of Logan. It doesn’t get to the point of screaming single phrases out. He just gets loud and high pitched.

* Much less of a doormat
– he made sure he was heard, even yelling over Logan when he had something important to say. He wouldn’t usually do that. Roman and Logan push him around a lot and he usually lets it happen.

* He’s very worried about everyone else
– “Do you have self esteem issues?” He’s concerned Roman has self esteem issues. “I don’t care how dark your clothes are, you shine! (Bright like a diamond!)” He’s worried about Virgil feeling bad. He also goes overboard trying to make Virgil feel better. I mean I love our dark strange son but “you could never be too much” is going a bit far. Patton doesn’t consider that though. He’s too busy trying to comfort everyone.

* More emotional than normal
– He very nearly cried because Roman said they were eyeshadow buddies. He has a lot of feelings. Nuff said.

Virgil: for someone who is the literal embodiment of anxiety he doesn’t really get anxious much (that the viewers can see and or are made aware of) he really causes it more. Maybe he’s just used to it. Anyway he appears anxious immediately before (like three seconds) and after (while he’s explaining why) he wants to be around Thomas’ friends more, and of course during his name reveal. He gets anxious when opening up.

* All the fidgeting with his hands
– he looks like he’s biting his thumbnail, he’s tapping his fingers, he’s touching his face and when his hands are off camera you can still tell from his arms he’s moving them around a lot. He doesn’t know where to put them and has a lot of nervous energy. During changes he reaches up to scratch his ear.

* Hiding
– He seems to be avoiding eye contact. He covers his face with his hands. He keeps looking at the floor. He glanced around the room quickly. He hunches his shoulders down a couple of times. Maybe he’s hoping he’ll sink into the floor. He doesn’t want to look at them and he doesn’t want them to see his face.

* He closes his eyes a lot
– a lot. The entire time he’s thinking about revealing his name and the entire time he’s explaining why he needs Thomas’s friends he keeps closing his eyes. And as he’s yelling “My name is Virgil” he closes them really tightly.

* Physical affects???
– I don’t know but a few of his facial expressions give me the impression he feels like he’s going to puke. Also between “Actually” and “on the subject of my name” he sticks his hands out and opens his eyes really wide, like he’s stabilizing himself. Like he’s dizzy. He swallows a lot to. Maybe his throat has gone dry? Maybe he’s trying not to puke? I don’t know. Anyways I’m pretty sure that he’s suffering more physically than the others are which I think kind of makes sense since he’s the physical embodiment of Anxiety.

* Blurting things out
– the big revelation, the thing he’s nervous about, that he wants to spend time with Thomas’ friends or that his name is Virgil, is very difficult so he says it very quickly and loudly and then glanced around waits for the others to attack him for it. He blurts out that he needs Thomas’ friends because Thomas seems mad at him and then he sighs and explains and you can tell he really regrets saying it.

* Uhhhhhhh
– he says uh a lot and pauses and even stutters a teeny weeny bit. He’s trying to word it right but he can’t think fast enough. Kind of the opposite of the others. Also his voice is the only one that doesn’t get higher.

* Fight or flight
– After admitting his name he crouched down lowers and looks at each of the suspiciously. He is afraid. Flight or fight engaged.

As a final note when they were in Anxiety’s room all of them started to look more and more like him. It was just the eye shadow it was also the hair and they seemed to adopt some of his posture too.

It’s two am and I did this on my phone, please excuse any mistakes. I just got a bit into it.