just let it out shikamaru

Wrong Things, Right Things

Summary: When assassins are sent to dispose of the Kazekage’s heir, Shikadai Nara, his parents devise a plan to keep him safe. Said plan may or may not involve a permanent move to Suna. Shikadai has never yet been to Suna. Naturally, complications arise.

HOLY SHIT ITS FINISHED……

So this is a 15,000 word fic meant to: (1) examine at what a fascinating intersection poor little Shikadai is situated (2) dismantle the notion that hypermasculinity is necessarily part of the shinobi way (3) EXPLAIN WHY TF FUCKING SHIKADAI NARA SHOULD BE THE STAR OF A NEXT GEN SERIES. I took a number of liberties in making up some Suna politics and also with the next gen in general (i.e. I use Sakura’s family name for Sarada bc of Personal Preference+Headcanons). Title from No One Is Alone from Into the Woods bc Fuck Me.

Enjoy!


          Naruto held the printed page in his hand. Frowning, he asked, “When did you get this?”

          “A half hour ago,” answered Shikamaru, standing in the Hokage’s office. The usual lazy grimace on his face was replaced with something tight and serious, his expression pulled taut. “It was disguised as a personal communication from her brother, which is why it didn’t come to you first. Just in case.”

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Naruto Gaiden FLOPS as predicted

I read today’s Naruto Gaiden chapter and tbqh it was BORING. And nonsensical. And OBVIOUS to anyone who understand the kind of demographic it was made for (NH/SS shippers and braindead teens who just want to read something that will anger SS shippers).

It seriously put me off the series entirely. Bolt had to run after Naruto to give him the bento Hinata prepared ONLY so that he could look even more bratty for no reason and to set the mood for the OBVIOUS AND ALREADY ANNOUNCED BY THE AUTHOR IN ALL HIS INTERVIEWS Borusara pairing that will happen in the movie, Salad was OBVIOUSLY targeted by the “mysterious” enemy so Shikamaru just let her waltz out of Konoha with a huge-ass Uchiha fan on her back to make sure the enemy could find her, Naruto noticed she was out of the village but didn’t give half a fuck about it before he realized she was running after him for the OBVIOUS reason he HAS to “save” them.

Even Chouchou OBVIOUSLY had to be portrayed as a conceited little bitch to whom a boy can’t even talk to before she assumes he’s in love with her, as it is traditional Konoha female behavior.

Oh and by the way, Naruto Gaiden is flopping SO HARD it’s not even in the top 50 manga rating (source), as I predicted. Because Japanese Naruto fans aren’t crack addicts.