just kidding please look at me

not to be a Mom™ but it worries me when i see young teens on here just listing a ton of information about themselves on their public blogs…i would recommend either like…not doing that, or make it so your blog is only view-able by your followers…there are very dangerous people on the internet, i know it seems trendy to joke about parents etc being overbearing about how their kids use the internet but its 100% within good reason, as i said, there are dangerous and nasty people out there looking for younger folks to take advantage of…just be careful about who you give your personal information to. in the end its completely the predators’ fault for taking advantage in the first place, but it never hurts to take some precautions in your internet endeavors. stay safe

8

Izzy and Alec are the best we’ve got.

anonymous asked:

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

  • So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.
  • So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂
  • Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???
  • Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.
  • The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.
  • Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.
  • It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.
  • It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment
  • Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious
  • Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound
  • One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂
  • One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.
  • As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.
  • It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.
  • Guys: It was me.
  • One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.
  • There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.
  • Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.
  • One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something
  • One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.
  • One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.
  • Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason
  • One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.
  • He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name
  • One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg
  • One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂
  • It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.
  • Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing
  • Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.
  • Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel
  • So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual
  • But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg
  • So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest
  • This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT
  • he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me
  • The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing
  • We never saw her in detention again😂
  • My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble
  • This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”
  • One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”
  • Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more
  • One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go
  • I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao
  • I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao
Stranger Things Season 2 trailer shot by shot run down

I do not claim or own any of these screenshots all rights to Netflix


aw look at my children doing normal children things can’t wait to see how long that’s going to last 

so, the way that Dungeons and Dragons was sort of the running analogy last season, my guess is that this game is going to be the overlying symbolism for this season.

my boys all back together and happy again can’t wait to see how long that’ll last :’)

so if this is the analogy I’m guessing the “sword” is going to be the key to slaying the monster

again, the dragon probably = the monster

and if so, the fact that Dustin seemingly LOST this game sort of worries me…

case in point

this trailer took approximately 15 seconds to get me to say “oh no”

AS I WAS SAYING (okay so obviously from what we left off on last season and the trailers/ teaser we’ve gotten. we now know this season is going to deal with the aftermath of the Upside Down for Will as well as the entire community as rifts have been opened to other worlds)

so i’m assuming Will’s main arc this season is going to be his struggle with being split between two worlds, and though I understand why they did it I wish we could see more of Will apart from that but oh well)

me too buddy, me too.

and thus, we have our big bad for the season *rubs hands together*

mike he is obviously not okay but thanks for being concerned

correct me if i’m wrong but is that Jonathan’s car? why is he leaving?

sooooo why isn’t Will at school?

stancy break up/ tension possibly? nothing good ever really comes from their meeting in this ally

aw…is this why he wasn’t in school? Joyce obviously knows something is up. (side note: is that Hopper behind them?)

oh come on-

these SOBs again?

so i guess maybe the Upside Down;s bleeding over to our world effect crops too???????

Hopper and Joyce as parents yes please (also Will is not okay)

“I felt it everywhere” wtf is that supposed to mean that’s terrifying

please just let the Byers family live someone give them a break

why do they look so suspect? who are they looking at?

honestly I’m loving the Halloween time theme I can’t wait for the aesthetics they’re going to be implementing

my connection/ insider I have previously hinted to me about a Steve/ kids dynamic that was going to be happening this season, but I’m actually very interested to see where this goes and the relationships that’ll come out of it

again with the aesthetics !!! yes !!! please!!! and !!! thank !!! you !!!

when the scientists are worried, it’s really time to get worried

uuuhhhhh yikes? blood is never a good sign?

ESPECIALLY AROUND DUSTIN NO DO NOT WANT THIS TRAILER IS MAKING ME REALLY CONCERNED ABOUT HIS SAFETY AS A CHARACTER

ah yes all is probably not well at the Wheeler household 

of course my dork sons all go trick or treating in matching Ghost Busters costumes I love them

it looks like he’s tracking something. buuuuut what?

HOP!! I MISSED YOU AND YOUR PERPETUALLY CONFUSED EYEBROWS

oooohhhhhh these boys look like they’re crushing on the new giiirrrllll 👀 (mainly Lucas and Dustin? maybe Will I can’t tell) (except for Mike because they really are doing everything they can to bury me in Mileven feels)

I can literally feel her angst radiating off the screen and I have a feeling I’m going to stan her unless the writers use her as a devise to cause tension or rivalry among the boys in which case someone is going to die

“Sometimes I feel like I can still see her” WHY DO THE WRITERS FEEL THE NEED TO HURT ME LIKE THIS GAH I MISS MILEVEN HE EVEN KEPT HER BLANKET FORT UP  (because also it’s important to note that this is the same shirt from the screenshot of them watching the girl walk in. so if Mike goes home and realizes he still misses I’m going to choke)

can’t wait for this to most likely just be a cat jump scare

they’re building something don’t ask me what

if I had to guess I would say some sort of device that picks up on signals from the Upside Down maybe? like some sort of crystal radio?

but why does Mike kind of look like hes going to smash it with the speaker?

new girl seems to be working with them/ part of the group now. but the box opened? idk this part is confusing

-EDIT/ UPDATE THANKS TO @disneyprincesskatherine apparently this is a reference to Ghostbusters! the box is similar to a device they use in the movies to catch ghost (i’m uncultured I’m so sorry). she also speculates this is the capture of the sort of “pet” Dustin gets that Gaten talked about (could also be why there is blood on Dustin’s chair)

okay but where is #4? they’re still in their Halloween costumes so we can assume it’s either the day of or the morning after, though on what looked to be Halloween night in one of the previous screencaps, all 4 were present soooo

more evidence of the world meshing

YOU BEST BELIEVE I SCREAMED OUT LOUD I MISSED THEM (they both looks so good I‘m loving the haircuts) (and is this them breaking into the lab?)

even though this is a gross slimy portal to another dimension, i’m still digging the aesthetics

Will is not okay part 87450507

this is either a drawing of a map of the Upside Down or all connecting tree roots. either way wtf Will?

This time on: OTPs With Unreal Height Differences 

it kind of looks like the same “tree roots” on the ground as there were at the gas station shot so yeah, I think Will was drawing a giant root system

🎶 you’re my daaad, you’re my dad, boogie woogie woogie 🎶

DREAM TEAM (Mike, Nancy, Jonathan, Joyce) (also can we laugh at the fact that Mike is armed with a candle holder while he stands next to his sister literally holding a shot gun)

Hop digging my grave for when I finish the season

*cues classic 80′s teen movie party montage*

my girl wildin out (and Steve’s there too I guess)

TELL ME WHO HURT YOU (this is a different outfit from the party though, so it’s not the same scene)

a new weapon? perhaps the “sword”?

!!!!!!

OH GOD TELL ME HOP IS OKAY

everyone in this trailer looks as shook as I feel watching it

Will Is Not Okay: The Saga Continues

same shirt so most likely what he’s experiencing on the other side. I’m almost certain he’s going to play a big role in Eleven being able to come back to the other side

Journey To The Center of the Earth (2008)

well well well, Samwise Gamgee, what’s poppin’

why does Steve have Jonathan’s bat?

as far as I can tell this treck into the Upside Down consists of Mike, Dustin, Joyce, and I can’t tell who the others are 

“ABORT ABORT!!!” (this is a different scene from the one above so I wonder what this is in reference to)

another shot of Will being scared out of his mind, this kid doesn’t ever get a break (though the background looks almost like the lab as opposed to the upside down. I could be wrong)

…well that’s concerning (kind of looks like that giant monster is chasing him)

“If you’re out there, please just give me a sign”

so this looks to be back in the Upside Down equivalent to the classroom where Eleven defeated the Demegorgan. and based on the look on her face and the previous shot above, it seems she JUST woke up

YES MY BADASS CHILD I NEVER DOUBTED YOU FOR A SECOND

yES HER RETURN IS ABOUT TO BE ICONIC

YALL MIND IF I WILD OUT OVER THESE AESTHETICS AGAIN

I’m so freaking happy for her return to Mike us

Lord almighty this season looks amazing.

BTS as Dad Tweets

Namjoon: One thing I definitely underestimated when I first became a father was the great amount of joy embarrassing my kids would bring me.

Seokjin: I constantly google “how to put your kids up for adoption” so my kids can find it on my search history and know that I’m not messing around.

Yoongi:
[in car drop off line at school]

Dad, this isn’t even our school.

“Look kids…Daddy’s hungover. Just go in there & learn something, ok?”

Hoseok: Parents say a lot of things over and over. For example, I just said “Please don’t pull Daddy’s pants down in public.” for the 500th time

Jimin: I hope I never hit that dad phase where I think it’s a good idea to buy a minivan.

Taehyung: My son can now reach the light switches so don’t come over to our house unless you’re really into raves or want to have a seizure

Jungkook:

Child: What’s neglect mean?

Me: Shhh daddy’s playing video games

halloween sentence starters

Feel free to change pronouns or anything else !

at a party

  • “I love the decorations.”
  • “There are so many sexy kitties in here.”
  • “Am I the only one in costume?”
  • “I’m not sure if this room is full of strangers or if I just can’t recognize anyone because of the costumes.”
  • “Do I hear ‘Monster Mash’ playing?”
  • “Come on, let’s dance. Even the skeletons are doing it.”
  • “Did someone spike the punch?”
  • “I hate costume parties…”

at a haunted house

  • “This stuff’s for babies.”
  • “AAAAAHHHHH!”
  • “Hey, can we…go home? Not that I’m scared.”
  • “BOO!”
  • “Wait, are you actually scared?”
  • “FuCK NO–”
  • “That makeup is so realistic.”
  • “I paid $40 so I better die.”

alone

  • “You should hang out with me later. I’m gonna marathon a bunch of movies.”
  • “[text] Hey, it’s me. I heard banging noises and I’m terrified. Please save me.”
  • “Halloween?? With friends?? What friends?”
  • “[text] I just heard some weird noises. [text] No I’m being serious. [text] I need you ri”
  • “I’m probably just going to stay up all night so the ghosts don’t kill me.”
  • “I’ll just be chilling with the monsters under my bed.”
  • “Maybe I’ll summon a demon so I have someone to hang out with.”
  • “Do ghosts like Netflix?”

with kids

  • “Don’t eat all your candy at once!”
  • “Aw~ I love your costume.”
  • “And who are you?”
  • “Look, man. You can’t give toothbrushes to kids on Halloween.”
  • “Trick or treat!”
  • “Let me check those before you eat them.”
  • “UGH, why am I stuck with a bunch of babies?”
  • “I wish it was socially acceptable for me to trick or treat on my own, but it’s not, so.”

with friends

  • “We should egg his/her/their house.”
  • “Help me with my costume!”
  • “TIME TO GET SPOOKY.”
  • “Are you just going to wear a T-shirt that says ‘costume’ on it?”
  • “Should we be drinking this much?”
  • “The ouija board says you’re a little shit.”
  • “Let’s tell ghost stories.”
  • “Time to join the skeleton war, bitches.”

as a flirt

  • “You look so hot in that.”
  • “After being freaks, are we gonna get freaky?”
  • “[jumps into __’s arms out of fear]”
  • “Your outfit is scary…take it off.”
  • “I came in here expecting a trick, but you’re a real treat.”
  • “If I was in a scary movie, I’d want to be trapped with you.”
  • “You–uh–spooked…my heart.”
  • “I’d let you haunt me all night long.”

misc.

  • “Let’s carve a pumpkin!”
  • “I’d be a witch in another life.”
  • “I wonder if I still have that ouija board…”
  • “Do you believe in ghosts?”
  • “What costume are you wearing?”
  • “Let’s pull a prank.”
  • “I hate Halloween.”
  • “Can you tell me why you have an actual skeleton in your closet?”
OTP Drabble Challenge!

Rules: Followers send a number to your ask, along with a pairing, and you write a drabble using that dialogue in your piece! Try to keep up! Expect a TON of requests!

  1. “The doctor said it’s normal” - “Well that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.”
  2. “Baby, you’re not a bother.” - “I’m too needy, you don’t deserve it.”
  3. “Come with me to the other room.” - “We’re not going to talk about this now.”
  4. “Did you just hiss at me?” - “Are you judging me?”
  5. “Don’t yell at me like I’m a child!!” - “DON’T THROW SCISSORS!”
  6. “Here, take me blanket/jacket.” - “I told you, I’m not cold.” *shivering*
  7. “Did you hear that?” - “I’m telling you, I’m haunted.”
  8. “I just wanted an easy day with my boyfriend/girlfriend. Is that too much to ask?”
  9. “Why are you awake right now?”
  10. “Come over here and make me.”
  11. “I want my best friend back.” - “Kevin is over there.”
  12. “H-how long have you been standing there?” - “Long enough.”
  13. “You’re lying, you’re blushing.” - “Shut up, no I’m not!”
  14. “No, I’m not talking to you.”
  15. “No more!” - “Okay, fine, I won’t send you any more selfies.”
  16. “What do you have?” - “Pizza rolls and Cup O’ Noodles…that’s about it. Popcorn?”
  17. “The salad here is really good.” - “Do I look like a fucking rabbit?”
  18. “Open this.” - “Can you say please?”
  19. “I just came to say goodbye…” - “Bullshit, you just feel bad.”
  20. “You’re on level 176.” - “Can you judge me harder?”
  21. “Jinx, you owe me a coke.” - *can’t speak until they buy a soda*
  22. “Please don’t leave me.” - “I don’t want to go”
  23. “Babe, I’m sorry.” - “Suck my ass.”
  24. “Liar, liar, pants on fire!” - “Seriously, you’re worse than a kid.”
  25. “You can’t ride a bike?” - “Why are we whispering?”
  26. “Is it that time of the month?” - “You literally ask me that whenever I’m mad at you!”
  27. “We’re going downtown.” - “There’s a strip club downtown.”
  28. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.” - “Well, you shouldn’t be saying it then.”
  29. “It’s not mine, I swear.” - “How is it not fucking yours!”
  30. “Take it off.” - “Like a bandaid?”
  31. “I told you…” - “Yeah, yeah, yeah, quit nagging.”
  32. “Boo?” - “You’re my boo.”
  33. “Don’t you ever do that again! You scared the shit out of me!”
  34. “You broke what?!?” - “Don’t worry, I’m okay.”
  35. “Why’re you dressed like that?” - “Does that mean it looks good or should I change?”
  36. “Fine, just do what you have to do.” - “Can you stop being so freaking cute so I can concentrate?”
  37. “…then I picked up your coffee by mistake.” - “All I want is an apology.”
  38. “Well, this is awkward.” - “Don’t touch me.”
  39. “You can’t make me.” - “What are you? Five?”
  40. “You’re a blanket hog!” - “Leave me alone and stop being so selfish.”
  41. “It’s not fair that you’re hot and funny.” - “Look who’s talking…just kidding, your jokes suck.”
  42. “I hate you.” - “No, you don’t.”
  43. “Should I be worried?” - “Is the grass green?”
  44. “You’re kidding me?!” - “Shush, my mom never taught me.”
  45. “I’m your lock screen?!” - “You weren’t supposed to see that.”
  46. “Will you go with me?” - “As long as you hold my hand.”
  47. “Baby, I’m scared.” - “You don’t have to be; not as long as I’m here.”
  48. “Come inside, I’m sorry.” - “Not until you apologize.” - “I just said I’m freaking sorry.”
  49. “Your voice is sexy.” - “Your ass is sexy.”
  50. “If I asked, you’d say no.” - “You don’t know that.”
  51. “Seriously, the chimney?” - “The squirrel can’t win!”
  52. “32?” - “I’ll prove it!”
  53. “It’s just so little and adorable.” - “That’s what she said.”
  54. “You’re not mature enough to be a parent.” - “Try me.”
  55. “Take a chance.” - “Umm…let me think…no.”
  56. “Game’s over, you son of a bitch!!” - “Okay, just don’t hit me.”
  57. “You forgot about my birthday!” - “In my defense, I forget about a lot of things.”
  58. “You need more stamina.” - “No, I need more steak and eggs. So…get on it.”
  59. “Can you dance with me?” - “You’re not mad?”
  60. “I’ll smash it, I swear.” - “You smash it and we’re done.”
  61. “Move!” - “Why would I move if I’m so comfy where I am?”
  62. “I’m not going in.” - “Then we’re not going to get a treat after.”
  63. “I really would’ve liked it if you told me your parents were coming to town.” - “I really would’ve liked it if you put underwear on before coming into the kitchen.”
  64. “I found it in the recycling bin.” - “Well, you’re the one killing the environment, so who’s really in the wrong here?”
  65. “We bet, and you lost.” - “But tattoos are permanent.”
  66. “Can you quit being so sassy?” - “Can you quit being so controlling?”
  67. “Are you getting jealous?” - “You’re changing your outfit, now!”
  68. “What time is it there?” - “We’re in the same time-zone.”
  69. “Quit flirting.” - “I didn’t mean to-”
  70. “I just don’t know what happened.” - “You’re too good for them.”
  71. “You have a cute nose, don’t make me break it.”
  72. “Tell me what I can do to help.” - “Sing me to sleep.”
  73. “You still need your baby blanket?”
  74. “Did you black out?” - “I feel like I’m gonna puke.”
  75. “Let’s just bury the hatchet.” - “Fuck your hatchet.”
  76. “I bet it’s a boy.” - “I bet it’s a turtle.”
  77. “Spare change?” - “You can’t be responsible, you don’t get your wallet.”
  78. “Cuddle or leave.” - “So is that a no to supper?”
  79. “Are you high?” - “I’m just so fucking tired.”
  80. “Why did I marry you?” - “It took a lot of convincing.”
  81. “Who’s texting you?” - “Umm. nobody.”
  82. “You have two choices.” - “Neither of which I like…”
  83. “I want a dog.” - “I want a cat.”
  84. “Chinese food?” - “Do we even know what that’s made of?”
  85. “These sheets are stained.” - “That’s disgusting.”
  86. “You don’t know how to change a tire?” - “Give it a rest, would you?”
  87. “That’s my ex-boyfriend/girlfriend.” - “Well, kiss me so they see.”
  88. “We got lucky. You’re not gonna do that again, right?”
  89. “Hey, babe, look what I found.” - “GET THAT OUT OF THE HOUSE NOW!!!”
  90. “You’ve been replaced.” - “Alright, we’ll see how you feel when you need me to kill a spider in the shower.”
  91. “Are those slippers?” - “Is that you being mean? AGAIN?”
  92. “You forgot your book.” - “No, I lost my book!”
  93. “You’re weird.” - “Or you’re just basic.”
  94. “We need a vacation.” - “You read my mind too much, it scares me.”
  95. “Why’d you hug him? You love him?”
  96. “Sorry.” - “Good choice.”
  97. “Luck? Nope. Skills.” - “If it’s skill then do it again.”
  98. “Why can’t you just believe me?” - “Because you lied about it before.”
  99. “This bath is too damn hot.” - “This is why we can’t do cute things. You complain too much.”
  100. *Make up your own*

Visit @prompt-bank for more prompts!!

Our Little Secret-Part One

Summary: After a hunt and quite a few drinks the boys learn that you aren’t as ‘experienced’ in one department as they thought you were. Dean thinks he can rectify that

Series Masterlist

Characters: Dean, Sam, Reader

Pairings: Dean x Reader

Square Filled/Kink: Oral Fixation for @spnkinkbingo

Word Count: 4700

Warnings: Smut, oral (male and female receiving), insecure reader, language

A/N: Thank you so much for reading. This is the first part of what I hope is a lengthy and smutty series. Any feedback is always appreciated. This is also for @emilywritesaboutdean and @wheresthekillswitch ‘s Do It Like TFW Challenge (The gif is near the bottom)

A thank you to my beta @ayeronda for betaing at an ungodly hour and being so wonderful.


It’s been a long ass day and an even longer hunt. You were more than happy to be sitting on Dean’s bed in the boys’ motel room, sipping on your second, or maybe it is the third beer. And that was just here, it wasn’t counting the four or five shots you had had down at the bar. So now you were here and Sam was riding Dean hard about his strikeout at the bar.

“Dude, you were never going home with her.”

“She doesn’t know what she’s missing out on.”

You can’t help but chuckle, “What? Two whole minutes?”

Keep reading

Rent-a-Boyfriend™

Words: 12k
Genre: Extreme fluff for all you bitter people out there (me being included)
Read the sequel drabble: here
Read more at Service Series 

Cr.

Are YOU lonely? Need someone to cuddle at night? Do you want love?

If you said ‘yes’ to any of the questions previously mentioned then we have a service for you!

Don’t be alone for this Valentine’s Day!

Come Rent a Boyfriend!™

(terms and conditions may apply. we are not responsible for any emotional or sentimental damages. please take caution with rent-a-boyfriend).

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BORUTO: NEXT GEN KIDS

Can we just talk about how:

1)Chocho has the ability to call out everybodies bullshit without even looking up from her nails.

2)Sarada is quite literally genin Sasuke in girl form complete with denial and please don’t club me with that idiot brat dialogue.

3) Inojin’s sass level is through the roof.

4) the purple haired girl whose name I’ve forgotten is like Hinata 2.0 but with more dialogue. If she beats Sarada in the boobs department when they grow up we know who Boruto will end up with.

5)Shikadai’s taller than the rest and has a legit excuse for being tired all the time because of his Boruto baby sitting duties. Poor dude does not get paid enough.

6)Boruto is so shit scared of his mom, the gentle smiling Hinata that it never fails to crack me up.

masterlist

one shots:

stories with multiple parts:

four word prompts:

drabble challenge

pls let me know if any of the links are broken!

PACIFIC RIM SENTENCE STARTERS.

  • ‘  when i was a kid, whenever i’d feel small or lonely, i’d look up at the stars. wondered if there was life up there.  ‘
  • ‘  tens of thousands of lives were lost.  ‘
  • ‘  this was just the beginning.  ‘
  • ‘  to fight monsters, we created monsters of our own.  ‘
  • ‘  we got really good at it. winning.  ‘
  • ‘  hey, kid. don’t get cocky.  ‘
  • ‘  please, after you. age before beauty.  ‘
  • ‘  you know what i’m thinking.  ‘
  • ‘  worry about yourself, kiddo!  ‘
  • ‘  ___, listen to me!  ‘
  • ‘  suits and ties, flashy smiles. that’s all they are.  ‘
  • ‘  bad news: three guys died yesterday.  ‘
  • ‘  well, orders are orders. what else am i supposed to do?  ‘
  • ‘  took me a while to find you.  ‘
  • ‘  i can’t have anyone else in my head again. i’m done.  ‘
  • ‘  haven’t you heard? the world is coming to an end.  ‘
  • ‘  so where would you rather die? here, or ____?  ‘
  • ‘  oh, no, call me ___. only my mother calls me doctor.  ‘
  • ‘  he was 2,500 tons of awesome. or awful. you know, whatever you wanna call it.  ‘
  • ‘  shut up. i don’t love them, okay? i study them.  ‘
  • ‘  things have changed. we’re not an army anymore, we’re the resistance.  ‘
  • ‘  i didn’t know it was this bad.  ‘
  • ‘  sorry about your brother.  ‘
  • ‘  you haven’t told me what i’m doing here yet.  ‘
  • ‘  numbers do not lie. politics and poetry, promises, these are lies. numbers are as close as we get to the handwriting of god.  ‘
  • ‘  politics and poetry, promises, these are lies.  ‘
  • ‘  and this… is the point where he goes completely crazy.  ‘
  • ‘  fortune favors the brave, dude.  ‘
  • ‘  they won’t give you the equipment, and even if they did, you’d kill yourself.  ‘
  • ‘  she’s one of a kind now.  ‘
  • ‘  i think you’re unpredictable.  ‘
  • ‘  you take risks that endanger yourself and your crew. i don’t think you’re the right man for this mission.  ‘
  • ‘  wow. thank you for your honesty.  ‘
  • ‘  one day, you’re gonna see that in combat you make decisions. and you have to live with the consequences.  ‘
  • ‘  you promised me.  ‘
  • ‘  vengeance is like an open wound.  ‘
  • ‘  to me, you’re dead weight. you slow me down, i’m gonna drop you like a sack of shit.  ‘
  • ‘  i’ve raised him on my own. he’s a smart kid, but i never knew whether to give him a hug or a kick in the ass.  ‘
  • ‘  it’s a dialogue, not a fight.  ‘
  • ‘  better watch it.  ‘
  • ‘  i’m not crazy. you felt it, right?  ‘
  • ‘  this is worth fighting for.  ‘
  • ‘  if you’re listening to this, well, i’m either alive and i’ve proven what i’ve just done works, in which case, ha ha, i won. or i’m dead and i’d like you to know that it’s all your fault. it really is, you know, you drove me to this. in which case, ha, i also won. sort of.  ‘
  • ‘  are you gonna say anything?  ‘
  • ‘  you look good.  ‘
  • ‘  like when you blink your eyes over and over and over again and all you really see are like, frames. it was emotion.  ‘
  • ‘  i’m okay. just let me control it.  ‘
  • ‘  you are a goddamn disgrace. you’re gonna get us all killed.  ‘
  • ‘  why don’t you just do us all a favor and disappear? it’s the only thing you’re good at.  ‘
  • ‘  so, what, you’re grounding us?  ‘
  • ‘  one: don’t you ever touch me again. two: don’t you ever touch me again.  ‘
  • ‘  now, you have no idea who the hell i am or where i’ve come from, and i’m not about to tell you my whole life story.  ‘
  • ‘  you know, you live in someone else’s head for so long… the hardest part to deal with is the silence.  ‘
  • ‘  well, that’s classified. so i couldn’t tell you. even if i wanted to. but it is pretty cool, so i might tell you. i’m gonna tell you.  ‘
  • ‘  jesus, we can’t just sit here and watch them die.  ‘
  • ‘  let me in, i’m a doctor!  ‘
  • ‘  we have a choice here. we either sit and wait, or we take these flare guns and do something really stupid.  ‘
  • ‘  as harsh as it sounds, there is no time to celebrate. we lost people. no time to grieve.  ‘
  • ‘  how sick are you? and why didn’t you tell me?  ‘
  • ‘  i haven’t exactly had a very good day, okay?  ‘
  • ‘  we’re gonna own this bad boy!  ‘
  • ‘  by jove, we are going to own this thing for sure!  ‘
  • ‘  today, at the edge of our hope, at the end of our time, we have chosen not only to believe in ourselves, but in each other.  ‘
  • ‘  today we are canceling the apocalypse!  ‘
  • ‘  as for you, well, you’re easy. you’re an egotistical jerk with daddy issues. a simple puzzle i solved on day one.  ‘
  • ‘  i just don’t want to regret all the things that i never said out loud.  ‘
  • ‘  well, my father always said, if you have the shot, you take it. so let’s do this.  ‘
  • ‘  all i have to do is fall. anyone can fall.  ‘
  • ‘  i can’t find his pulse. i don’t think he’s breathing.  ‘
  • ‘  no. don’t go. please.  ‘
  • ‘  you’re squeezing me too tight. i couldn’t breathe.  ‘
  • ‘  where is my goddamn shoe?  ‘
Knight in Shining Armor (Steve Harrington x Female Reader)

Requested by: @cometoceantrenches ( Okie since you take requests, is it okay if you write smth with our boi Steve where the reader drops off their younger sister at the Snow Ball the same time Steve drops off Dustin but Steve offers to take the reader home but they end up at a cafe or smth and talk abt the crazy stuff that happened (fighting the demodogs and all that) and end up confessing to each other?? im sorry if its long af, you just write rlly well *ugly cries*)

Summary: While waiting for the Snow Ball to end, Steve and you catch up at a local cafe where they recount the events of the demo-dogs, and then conversation becomes personal.

Word Count: 3013

Warnings: fluffy af and some smooches. Also get’s a bit emotional towards the end. lets also assume he’s always ooc to me

Note: if there is another gif that kills me it’s also this one!  I kind of just a little went overboard and it’s pretty long but I HOPE YOU LIKE IT! Enjoy!!!

Minor Spoilers of Season 2!!

Originally posted by mikkeljensen

“Do I look okay?” your sister Jen asked for the 100th time from the backseat of your mother’s car. You rolled your eyes, not even bothering to look at her.

“You look great, Jen,” you replied.

“You didn’t even look!” she cried.

For perhaps the third time you spun yourself around to take a look at your sister who was all dolled up and ready for the Snow ball.

“You look beautiful, now stop asking and stop touching your hair,” you slapped her hand away lightly, she flinched and grumbled. You knew she had a crush on one of the boys there, she just wouldn’t tell you who it was. But by how nervous she was, and how she was acting, you knew what was bothering her.

“Hey…whoever this boy you’re crushing over…he’s gonna think you’re the most beautiful girl in the room okay? And he’s going to ask you to dance,” you said, fixing her hair for her. Jen blushed.

“And if he doesn’t?”

You scoffed, “Then he’s a damn idiot, and you’re too good for him,” Jen let out a laugh. Your mother glanced at you two before pulling up in front of the school, behind another car who was dropping off their kid.

Unfortunately for you, your mother had wanted you to stick around the parking lot all night and wait for the Snow ball to end. Also, it was really, really cold out there. But, you didn’t want your mom to worry over Jen all night, so you agreed to stay. You would find something to do, even if that included freezing to death.

Death. Hah. That word honestly didn’t even faze you that much anymore, not after what had occurred in the past month. Images of alien like dog creatures Dustin had called ‘Demo-dogs’ flashed through your mind, especially of the one he called ‘Dart’ who nearly chewed your face off. And then there was that girl with the slicked back hair who everyone seemed to recognize except for you and Steve. Apparently, she had superpowers and helped close the gate and saved the world or something. You honestly didn’t know what to believe, or even do with all this newfound information.

You guessed life would just go on eventually, and somehow you’d manage to live past it.

You stood next to your sister, both of you waving good-bye to your mother, who yelled, “Have a good time and be safe!” before driving off and out of the drop-off zone. Jen sighed, flattening down her light pink dress.

“Are you really going to stay out here all night?” Jen asked as you both walked towards the entrance, you shrugged.

“It’ll be fun- staying out here all by myself in the freezing cold in order to avoid my past middle school teachers trying to catch up with me,” Jen laughed, stopping in front of the entrance and turning to face you.

“Are you sure I look okay, (y/n)?”

You glared slightly at her, pretty sure she’s just taking in the compliments, but you just smiled and held a thumbs up. Jen was about to speak before her eyes caught something behind you. Her cheeks suddenly turned the same color as her dress. You raised a brow, and turned around, seeing who had made her all flustered.

“Dustin?” you asked, the younger boy was surprised to see you here, but not as surprised as you when you saw how much his hair looked super familiar.

“What are you doing here, (y/n)?” he asked, you tore your eyes from his hair and pointed behind you.

“Just dropping off Jen-” but when you turned around, she was gone and already in the gym. You blinked, huffing slightly as you realized that Dustin was the boy she was so keen on. You laughed lightly, thinking that it was the cutest thing ever.

Your mind went back to Dustin’s hairstyle the moment you looked back at him.

“Okay- tell me right now…is Steve your role model or something?” You asked, jokingly. Dustin gave you an annoyed look before you chuckled, “You look great kiddo, now go in there and for the love of god find Jen and ask her to dance,” you winked. Dustin furrowed his eyebrows.

“Wait- what? really?”

You clicked your tongue before your eyes went to the car Dustin had gotten out of. Your jaw dropped when you instantly recognized it as Steve’s. Dustin noticed your excitement and gave a smug smile.

“He’s staying because he saw you and is hoping you’ll go over there to talk or something,” he said nonchalantly, you side-glanced Dustin, seeing him look at the car and wave. You can just feel Steve’s glare on the kid. You merely laughed it off.

“Don’t you have a ball to attend, kid?” you asked, Dustin cursed softly and walked into the entrance, muttering something about asking Jen to dance, a cheeky grin on his face. You shook your head, crossing your arms against your chest before turning and starting to walk over to Steve’s car.

You leaned down to his open window, a toothy grin and asked, “Is that you Steve? My knight in shining armor?” Steve smiled at the sight of you, and waved your comment off.

“Yeah, the one and only,” he responded, knowing you were referring to when he saved you from losing your face to some demo-dog, “Are you going to head home?”

You shook your head.

“Gotta stay here until it ends and make sure Jen is still alive after or something,” you shrugged, Steve laughed.

“Oh no- that’s not okay,” he said, “As your knight in shining armor, I’m going to save you from freezing to death…” he reached over and opened the car door, his other hand still resting on the wheel. You put your hand over your heart.

“Wow…what a gentlemen,” you commented as you climbed into his car, Steve shrugged, eyes still resting on you. You didn’t notice the way he stared at you, like Dustin had noticed when Steve pulled up and saw you.

“That’s what I am, didn’t you know?”

You just hummed, hugging your arms closer to you. Steve noticed, eying your shivering form before an idea popped in his mind.

“Wanna go get a warm drink or something?” he asked, you tilted your head in thought.

“Warm drink? You mean like coffee?” you asked, a playful glint in your eyes.Steve stared at you for a moment, before realizing how stupid he must sound.

“I said that…” he muttered. You snickered, but nodded.

“Yeah, I could go for a warm drink…” Steve cracked a smile, eyes still lingering on yours before starting his car. When he looked away as he began to drive out of the parking lot, you looked at the side of his face, thinking you saw a shade of pink on his cheeks…but it was too dark.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

(Revised Prompt): Miraculous Ladybug, "So you're saying in a class of over a dozen people NO ONE CAN AGREE ON WHAT LADYBUG AND CHAT NOIR LOOK LIKE?!"

“So you’re saying in a class of over a dozen people NO ONE CAN AGREE ON WHAT LADYBUG AND CHAT NOIR LOOK LIKE?!” Kim bellowed. 

Marinette face planted against her desk and groaned. Tikki hadn’t been kidding about her identity being protected by magic. 

“Listen,” Chloe screeched above the din, “I’ve been rescued by her the most and I am telling you her hair is shoulder length and slightly wavy no matter what little miss blogs-a-lot says!” 

“You also said she is taller than you, so clearly your opinion is worth nothing,” Alya shouted back. 

“All the people I like are taller than me,” Chloe retorted, “isn’t that right Adrikins?” 

“Please leave me out of this,” Adrien said. So far he was the only other person in the room who looked just as miserable about this class squabble as Marinette felt. His head was cradled against is crossed arms as he stared listlessly towards the door as if wondering if he could make a run for it. She could kiss him for that. Not that she wouldn’t take any excuse to kiss him. Maybe she should suggest they both sneak of somewhere to make out while their classmates argued. Marinette smiled at the daydream. As if she could ever actually pull off something so bold where Adrien was concerned. 

“This is stupid,” Kim complained “we have photos we should know every detail about what they look like.” 

“I’m pretty sure there is some sort of magical element that keeps us from properly retaining the information in a way that might jeopardize their identities,” Max theorized. 

“If Ladybug had magic power over her appearance you would think she would have attempted to look more attractive,” Lila said flicking her hair behind her shoulder. “Instead she is such a short thing with dull black hair and beady dark little eyes.” 

The class burst out into another round of shouting as Chloe and Alya both attempted to dive atop the Italian girl, only barely being held back by Kim and Nino. 

Marinette wondered briefly if anyone would care if she just threw herself out the window. She was about to attempt to sneak off to the bathroom when she heard Adrien talking quietly to himself. 

“Blue,” he murmured softly.  

Marinette’s breath caught in her throat.

“Her eyes are blue.” 


(I am no longer taking sentence prompts just finishing the ones I have left) 

4

YOI Future!Verse ABO AU, Visual Headcanon Web Charts #01

So I always wanted to make one of these. Turns out my headcanons for the most part are WAY too wordy for these things and uh, they’re a bit of a mess >.>;; BUT I hope nonetheless that they’re somewhat fun to read even if barely legible, it was fun to make ^ ^;

1. Super basic relationship chart of the core members of the lovely poly family in this AU.

2. “Adults Think,” the color of each adult indicates their feelings towards the person to whom the arrow is pointing.

3. “Kids Think,” the color of each OC kid indicates their feelings towards the person to whom the arrow is pointing.

There’s obviously a lot more to it than what could be crammed in the lil text boxes, but a gist and pretty much the first things that immediately popped into my mind regarding their interactions. 2 and 3 also mostly show their thoughts while the kids are younger, which will change a bit as they grow up, to be covered in a future post.

*Recommended you right click view image to see full size bc the text is tiny oops

Because the text is so illegible, text only versions of charts 2 and 3 beneath cut, all elaborated quite a bit because I’m so rambly oops:

~~

IF YOU ARE NEW TO THIS AU: It’s Yuuri-centric polyamory in an ABO setting, Yuuri’s married to four mates (Victor, Yurio, Phichit, Minami) and they have OC kids.

BASICS of this AU

INTRO to how ABO works in this AU

OTHER POSTS (comics + illustrations) in the Future!Verse ABO section of my YOI Masterpost.

~~

Please keep ship bashing out of the comments/tags. Don’t like, just skip <3 Thank you.

~~

PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, EDIT, OR OTHERWISE USE MY ART WITHOUT MY EXPLICIT PERMISSION. More detailed rules available on my Rules & FAQ Post.

~~

Keep reading

Nessian’s Kids Headcanons

I know this is unexpected from me because I was vehemently against any pregnancies/baby faes for any of the ships in ACOWAR but I am okay with them having kids waaaaay way down the line. Anyway, I don’t remember how this happened but Sarah @nessiansmut and I came up with a few headcanons of Azriel and Elain babysitting Nessian’s kids so here we go:

  • The inner circle would do the ‘not it’ thing whenever nessian need a babysitter. no one would be able to keep those kids in line
  • Elain would volunteer as a last resort 'how bad can it be?’
  • Azriel agrees to help because Elain convinces him he could probably help keep the kids entertained with his shadows
  • one hour in they’re missing one child, one’s running around naked and another’s pulling at Azriel’s wings trying to get him to spread them wide so they can see them
  • just imagine loud curly headed children running around everywhere
  • even azriel’s shadows wouldn’t be a match for them. Elain would be frantically screaming at him to find the missing kid and he’d just be like 'I’VE GOT NOTHING! IT’S LIKED THEY DROPPED OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH!’
  • I thought fae children were supposed to be rare where do they keep coming from????
    From your damn sister who apparently spends all her time “training” doing something else entirely
    Someone needs to stop them before they make a small army
  • The naked kid is pulling out all these random weapons and Elain is just horrified. “Do they not baby proof?!?” (Cass would be offended to hear that: 'that is baby proof! the blade’s shorter than 20cm!’ )
  • Azriel would be begging and pleading for Rhys to use his daemati power to convince the kids to calm down “But you’re High Lord surely you can get them to stop moving.”
  • one of the kids would be grinning really wide but his teeth have a blue glow and Az sees and he’s like 'Spit out the Syphon! Geez, how and when did you even get that?’ (SOMEONE PLEASE DRAW THIS)
  • a completely dishevelled Elain would be furiously whispering to Az “Just knock them out! Not too hard. Nobody has to know. It’s the only way to get them to sleep and we can get a break. Please”
  • Azriel trying to change diapers having to use his shadows to stop the kid from squirming around
  • 'AZ I CAN’T FLY YOU NEED TO GET HER DOWN FROM THE ROOF ASAP' 
  • one of the babies is that type of kid who just doesn’t stop asking questions. “Are your wings bigger than daddy’s? Do you sleep upside down like a bat? Why are yours blue?”
  • the only reason nessian needed a babysitter was to go to the cabin in the illyrian mountains and have sex for a few hours.  
  • Nesta: I have a meeting with the humans. Emissary business he’s coming for protection.
    Elain: *mutters under breath* the only protection he needs to provide is of the contraceptive kind
    Azriel: emissary business my ass.
  • imagine Az with a baby hanging onto his back for dear life and nibbling at his wing while he’s trying to find his pacifier “Elain it bit me” “Azriel they have names…" 
  • "PLEASE STOP CHEWING AT MY WINGS DEAR GOD ELAIN THEIR BABIES ARE CANNIBALS”
  • “I fought Hybern. Twice. I survived my brothers. This this is too much.“
  • They find a 4th kid just sitting in the kitchen completely still. they’d look outside into the living room muttering "1…2…3…” they turn and look into the kitchen “4?…” “I thought they only had 3.” “So did I.”
  • after they realise that two of them are twins Elain would be running around yelling 'WHO ARE YOU?! WHERE’S THE SECOND YOU?!’
  • Nesta then lets them know that they won’t make it home in time and they need them to babysit the kids overnight  “What do you mean you’re running late and watch them for 3 hours is now over night? What do we feed them? Do they sleep?” 
  • eventually Nesta and Cass would come back and Az would be passed out on the couch with a baby cradled in the crook of his wing on the floor, the baby’s nappy not even secured properly. Elain would be sleeping upstairs with her head on the toilet seat with two more kids sleeping in a nest of blankets in the bathtub and the fourth kid would be in the kitchen stuffing his face with marshmallows and grinning at them when they come home
  • They wouldn’t even blink, though. Cass would just pick the kid up when he makes grabby hands at him and goes 'DADA!’ and he’d be like 'Heeeey buddy… did you give auntie Elain and uncle Az a hard time?’ and the kid would nod and he’d be like 'good job!’ and fist bump his little fist. Nesta would go upstairs to wake Elain up and thank her
  • Elain would wake up and the first thing she says is  “I swear to god, Nesta if you have any more kids not even your death powers will save you from my rage” or “I’d rather be thrown in the cauldron again than babysit these monsters again.”

BONUS Headcanons:

  • Nesta and Cassian have 4 kids: the oldest is a girl, the twins and the youngest are boys
  • They name the girl after Cassian’s mother
  • the twin who always disappears has Nesta’s personality and he always just hides somewhere and reads

Svt as weird customers I’ve incountered~

Hey hey hey ya girl is back again, WOOP


Kk here we go, pls enjoy~

-

Scoups: “Can you double bag the gummy snacks? I don’t want my wife to know I’m cheating on my diet, I Mean, they’re for my kids obviously but…please”

Jeonghan: “be careful that one is open,
I washed my hair in the bathroom sink to make sure I liked it”

Joshua: “young miss look to your right. Now your left. And behind you. God was everywhere you just looked have a blessed day”

Junhui: “I didn’t like the aura your bathroom had”

Wonwoo: “I wish you guys sold books here *whispers* "yea, that’d be nice”

Hoshi: “I can’t find the lamp aisle; where is the lamp aisle”

Woozi: “I almost punched someone, not because they made me mad I just *punches in front of him* reflexes you know?”

Mingyu: “LOWER YOUR CEILINGS I JUST HIT MY HEAD-wait no, raise your ceiling haha I’m stupid, no stop it you are amazing yeah!”

The8: *gets 20 cases of beer* “don’t judge the state of my liver.”

Dk: “I wish it was sunny outside so I could be happy again!” *laughs like they’re about to cry*

Seungkwan: “I came in here to see how my butt looked in these jeans but you don’t sell full length mirrors so I’m going to Walmart now”

Vernon: *smoking a joint while buying chicken and then leaving the chicken on the register*

Dino:
Me: “would you like a sticker?”
Him: “I’m actually seven now so a sticker is not required to make me happy”

august 21st aka fanfic writers appreciation day.

i saw this post going around and i’ve decided to make a post to a) recommend you some great stories and amazing writers, b) give some sort of feedback. i don’t really have that much time to read anymore, so this won’t be that long. as soon as i get more time, i’ll start reading again :) the list is in no specific order, i was going through my “following” list and through my fic recs blog.


@noona-la-la-la  — i recommend literally everything noona ever wrote. i love her style and her plots and the fact that she always manages to exceed my expectations. she’s one of those writers whose stories aren’t just about the smut, which i love. of course, the amazing smut is just a bonus. my favorite story of hers is either unexpected or conditioned (which is also one of my fave tae stories ever. e v e r.) and her vmin threesome the group project is amazing! i’m so far up her ass it’s not even funny, but i seriously love everything about her blog and her writing.


@ellieljade  — amazing plots! a m a z i n g. and the dirty talk! the smut scenes are just too good, and mr.min is my favorite yoongi series. i love the plot, i love the fact that the characters aren’t labeled as good or bad, there’s a lot of grey areas and you never know what to expect. if you want to cry, read her this is how you lose her series and come bitch about it with me. and did i mention sub namjoon? because damn, watch me is amazing.


@avveh — some of the best dirty talk and pwp ever. i enjoy reading her stories from the first one she posted, which is reveries. i don’t even watch the show it’s based on, but i love the series. emily can really suck you into the plot, regardless of the smut. of course, you know me, my favorite is jealousy games because jungkook AND jimin. you know.


@xhixtape — i could go on about lila forever. the flow in her stories is amazing, i love the slow build ups in some stories, and i love the smut in all of them. she’s a huge inspiration for me and her work has inspired a lot of mine, i think i might be her biggest fan. read everything! my favorites are kitten’s got his tongue, good mornings, and vibrations. vibrations, man!!!

@tayegi — lu is one of the OGs of bts fanfics, so i’m sure you’re all already reading her stories. i lover her ocs, i love that they know how to speak for themselves and that they know what they want and aren’t afraid to go for it. my favorites are fuck, marry, kill (because JIMIN), the golden boy because T A E, and friendship goals because TAEGI.


@kimtrain — okay, one good purr had me hooked ! i loved the slow burn and tae′s character and everything about it, from the plot to her style. that’s also one of my favorite tae stories ever.  also, the wings of a devil? b o m b. she has a huge masterlist and i need to read all of her stories.


@floralseokjin — blessed is the day i found out about jordan’s blog. i love everything she writes, i don’t care what member the stories are about because they’re that good. i love her style because it makes me get into the story so much that i can’t stop reading. the first story i read was salt and shadow and i still love it. her jin stories are the best out there and i love reading them. show me might be my fave. also, playing with fire is bomb.


@gukvory —  can you feel it, sugar? is a masterpiece. actually, everything on this masterlist is a masterpiece. i love her writing style, i love the flow, i love the feeling i get when reading her stories. just read everything of hers, you won’t regret it.


@kittae — eva writes for other groups as well! i’ve only read most of her bts stories, and my faves are v-card because it’s the right amount of everything, and favourites and servants is so good! there’s still so many stories on her masterlist to read and i can’t wait to read more. 


@dailydoseofdia — i’m gonna recommend carousel because it’s one of the stories i’ve been meaning to read, but just didn’t have enough time for, even though everyone is praising it. i’ve read dia’s fics and they’re amazing, so i don’t doubt that carousel is just as great. lick was amazing and it’s the first thing i’ve read on her blog.


@chinnychimchim — ah. ah! one of my favorite writers. i seriously love everything she posts, i don’t ever check who the story is about. my favorite has to be reset. it’s such a good story and i haven’t read anything similar, so i love it. cognitive dissonance is also a must read. just read the entire masterist while you’re at it, it’s worth it.


@kstopping  — who doesn’t want a good mmf threesome with vmon? that’s exactly what cinnamon sugar is and i LOVE IT. also tags that crack me up every time.


@jungkookfortunekookies  — for those who don’t read smut, there’s a ton of popular stories on her masterlist, including jungkook roommate series which is so fun and easy to read!


@jeylovestoblog — i’ve heard jey writes amazing reader/girl/member threesomes, so i need to check them out, and i recommend you do the same. she updates often, so i’m sure you’ll find something for yourself.


@rapmonluv — all i’ve read so far is nightcall and it’s enough for me to know i’ll love everything else.


@jingukz — sarah’s stories are amazing and you know that i prefer smut, but her stories are that good. she doesn’t need smut to pull you in, but when it’s there, it’s great. bliss among sinners is probably my fave, but the first one i’ve read is cry me a river and i’m still not over it.


@emboyz — i still need to go through her masterlist, but i’ve read good catch and it’s great!


@pjxmin — i don’t get how everyone’s not talking about her writing. caught in a lie is amazing, proposals is such a good story, her writing is amazing and her stories are fun and they just pull you in. amazing writer!


@cosykims — merlot murders (the crimson killer, kisses of carmine) is the most underrated series i’ve ever read. it has everything and i can’t praise it enough, seriously. you need to read it!


@jiminniemouse — i think i’ve read everything of hers and there wasn’t a single story i didn’t like. i love her style, i love her plots, i just love everything about her writing. purple jewels is so well written and interesting, i can’t get enough. seriously, i recommend everything.


@wonhopes — amanda’s writing is amazing. i think you’ve all read not so honest, but i think my favorite might be cat got your tongue because TAEEEE.


@mindfullofcrazy — i absolutely loved give me love!!!


@hobibliophile — i think i’ve read everything on her masterlist and i loved it! my favorites are take a break (jihope threesome ftw), blue blooded (prince jin!!!), and don’t care about the presents (namjoon being a cutie).


@kainks — i love her writing style! my favorites are new guy and triplicity because damn, hoseok and yoongi threesome? i’m in. orange tulips is on my to read list, i’ve heard great things about it.


@versigny — if you haven’t read miss dial, i don’t know what you’re doing. read it. now. i love it!


@baeseoul  — protege is probably my favorite jungkook series ever. it’s so well written, i love the plot, i love the characters and their flaws, i just love everything about the story. destruction of a muse is on my to read list. just great writing in general, one of my favorite writers.


@protectaetae — i love her writing style! one night snap pt 1 and 2 saved me.


@taehyung-the-baehyung  — closer is amazing and so is the suit and tie series! amazing :)


@jheartseok — i still haven’t read nude, not flowers and i suck because i’ve heard it’s an amazing story. i need to read everything of hers.


@roseok — just read everything. amazing writing.


@drquinzelharleeni’m not a kid is a great series. there’s so much more i have to read from her masterlist, but i like her writing style!


there are a lot of writers who i still need to check out and i’m looking forward to it. i’m sorry if i’ve forgotten someone! if i’ve ever given you a compliment about your writing, i truly meant it. i hope i’ve included everyone. if you go check out these writers, please don’t ask them about updates :)