just kidding i was still 18 when this photo was taken

Growing Love - Part 3: Eternal Flame

Characters: Y/N Y/L/N, Jensen Ackles, Rowen Ackles, Brice Ackles, Jayden Ackles

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: Can’t think of any. Pretty much just fluff.     

Wordcount: 2000ish

A/N: This is a real people fic but it is an AU Mini Series. Jensen is a photographer, Jared owns a bar and Misha is a doctor. It is my first time writing a real people fic in AU so lets hope I don’t fall on my face completely here.

I didn’t write this chronologically as I usually do. I wrote everything that the narrator tells us first and build the story around that. The narrator’s story can be read without the actual story and the actual story can be read without the narration. The narrator only actually tell us the things in cursive, the rest is Jensen’s PoV ;) Again let’s hope I land on my feet with this one.

It is written for @avasmommy224’s Birthday Challenge and Jenn is a total sweetheart who let me make a series out if this. The prompt is in part 2 and the acquired smut is in part one, I reused the prompt partially in this part which is the final part.

Happy Birthday Jenn. Hope you enjoyed it.

Thanks to to my fav Erin aka @blacktithe7 for being the rockstar she is and betaing this for me.

NO HATE AGAINST DANNEEL. I LOVE HER - THIS IS FICTION. PRETEND SHE IS HAPPY WITH SOMEONE ELSE

MASTERLIST

You see, love doesn’t always start with fireworks. Not the eternal kind. Not unconditional long lasting kind. Their kind of love never ends and do you know how I know? I witnessed it. I watched it grow stronger every day. I watched the way my dad looked at my mom and the way she would blush. She still does. After 3 kids and 18 years of marriage, they still kiss each other every day. Mom still falls asleep on the couch leaning against my dad on movie night. He still looks at her with as much love as he did in my very first memory of them, if not more.

Y/N did write her book. Actually she wrote several, and Jensen never stopped taking pictures. His works are displayed in various museums and magazines, but my favourite pictures he ever took are the ones of his family.

There is a staircase at Jensen and Y/N’s house. My childhood home. The wall is covered in pictures my dad took of Mom, Jaydan, Brice and me, but in the middle of all the photographs is my mom’s handwriting. It says “My Favourite Day”.

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Japan (Shawn Mendes)

Hey! I’ve been inspired to write this fluff by the Instagram Shawn uploaded, plus I’ve always wanted to go to Japan, so here it is, I hope you like it :) Only thing I have to say, that Shawn’s girlfirend here’s 18!

Word count: 1.1k

Warning: none, just too much fluff


I tossed and turned myself to the point, that it became morning, and the sunrays – instead of warming my body – pointed right to my face, making me grumpy in a matter of seconds. I covered my face with my right arm, inhaling the dry air, then stretching my limbs. After I hid my face into the huge, white pillow it became quite obvious, that it wasn’t my usual one, judging only by the size of it. It took me a good two minutes to realize, I wasn’t in my own flat, neither in my country.

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You aren’t my father.

A/N: I don’t even know what’s happening anymore. Reader is Sam’s daughter. In this story Dean has gotten outta the life and is married and has kids of his own. Reader is 18.

Dean x Niece!Reader

Originally posted by canonspngifs

You stared at the last photo that was ever taken of you and Sam, your father. Dean had taken it while you were all celebrating your fifth birthday in the bunker. Sam had his arms wrapped around your shoulders from the back while you looked excitedly at the cake. That photo was almost thirteen years old, meaning it had been nearly twelve years since your father died.

You remember it like it was yesterday; he had been sick for a while, it wasn’t until a few years ago Dean told you that he had been completing trials that would close the gates of hell forever. Your dad had sacrificed life for the greater good, that’s how Dean had put it. You held a bit of resentment towards your dad for choosing to do something that would forever take him away from you.

 But, he was still your hero.

After he died Dean moved you and himself to a small town in North Carolina; a place where nothing really happened. You went to school but didn’t really fit in with any of the kids; you were the weird kid who liked to read books and believed in monsters. You were extremely close with your uncle during this time; whenever Dean wasn’t working in the shop he was spending time with you. He taught you how to fish, fix baby, and the two of you had more movie nights then you could count.

The dynamic between you two changed after he started dating Allison when you were nine. At first it was small things, like ditching movie nights for dates. After they got married things still remained the same; Dean was still a great uncle and Allison was an amazing aunt. Allison had your first cousin, Jake, when you were twelve, this was when things changed dramatically.

Movie nights were nonexistent; so was learning how to work on the impala, and there was no talk of hunting what so ever. Dean had never told Allison hunting but would still teach you about it, saying it was in your blood, that if Sam had died doing it then you had a right to at least know about it.

Even if he repeatedly told you that hunting was not going to be in your future.

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Swinging Lifestyle

100 ways you know you’re a Swinger!
;) ;) ;)
1. You are wearing wristbands in most of your vacation photos.
2. Half of the numbers on your cell phone are listed only by screen names.
3. You are running out of reasons to tell your coworkers why you can’t go out with them this weekend.
4. You have over 50,000 frequent flyer miles on Air Jamaica.
5. You know most of your friends’ by their first names (Rich & Jen, Frank & Beth) but you don’t know their last names.
6. You have more lingerie than a hooker.
7. You had already seen pictures of your friends naked before you ever met them in person.
8. You position the computer screen in such a way your children can’t sneak up on you.
9. You can’t remember the last time you had pubic hair.
10. Before traveling somewhere, you look up couples in that area.
11. You worry about explaining to the neighbors why 10 couples show up on a Saturday night carrying over night bags and don’t leave until Sunday afternoon.
12. Your spouse asks you if you want to have sex, and your first thought is”With who?”
13. Your gynecologist wonders why you’re asking for birth control when he knows that your husband has had a vasectomy.
14. Your hot tub has never had a bathing suit worn in it.
15. Your sex toy collection costs more than your china set.
16. Your wife has a shirt that says: “I Like Girls Too.”
17. You have a stripper’s pole in the middle of your den.
18. You giggle at the golf course when someone asks if they can join you for a foursome.
19. The last thing you typically do at a party is search for your wife’s thong.
20. You’ve hugged your friends goodnight while naked.
21. You hear the word “Playmate” and your first thought is NOT “Playboy”
22. The word “slut” has become a term of endearment.
23. You remember to bring lube before you remember to bring lipstick.
24. Your choice in new carpeting is heavily based on which type won’t give you rug burns.
25. You’ve taken your Liberator with you to a dinner party.
26. The term Vanilla isn’t just a flavor to you.
27. You bet your wife who can score first with that cute girl.
28. You are constantly encouraging your kids to spend the weekend at friends’ houses.
29. You don’t think twice about wearing a short skirt, high heels and fishnets when it’s freezing outside.
30. Your wedding reception has an after party.
31. You get dressed for a party and don’t worry about comfort because your clothes won’t be on for very long.
32. You panic when your friend’s digital camera goes missing.
33. You’ve invited friends over and watched porn.
34. You’ve invited friends over and made porn.
35. You’ve watched someone do a tequila shot off of your wife’s breasts.
36. Your friends know what brand of condom you prefer.
37. You wake up in the morning and find that half of the cloths on the floor don’t fit you or your wife.
38. Your kids think it’s normal for adults to have sleepovers.
39. A hot tub is considered a necessity not a luxury.
40. You believe in Unicorns… Because you’ve actually ridden one.
41. You leave the kids at home when you go to the toy store.
42. You take photos of yourself with your head out of the frames, on purpose.
43. You can’t decide which of your three naughty schoolgirl outfits you should wear tonight.
44. You always keep a supply of condoms, lube and clean hand towels by your bed… And your guest bed… And your couch in the living room.
45. Every day is “Hump Day”, not just Wednesday.
46. You frequently use the term “Friends of friends” when explaining how you know certain people.
47. You know which of your outfits looks best under a black light.
48. You have an entire closet devoted just to themed outfits.
49. You place a ad that reads: “Wanted: Reliable babysitter who is willing to stay till sunrise and doesn’t ask any questions.”
50. You choose furniture based on which best repels semen stains.
51. The staffs at Hedo and Desire send you birthday cards.
52. You come home with that, “There’s Something About Mary” hairstyle.
53. The babysitter wonders why you are always already wearing your full-length coat when she arrives, even in summer.
54. In the gym shower you’re the only guy with shaved balls.
55. You know the most flattering angle at which to photograph your genitals.
56. All of your vacation photos were taken inside your hotel room.
57. You have free places to stay in almost all the fifty states and several cities in Europe.
58. You’ve ended e-mails with “Bi-Bi”.
59. You can expertly identify the differences between every type of breast implants.
60. On Christmas, there are certain presents that can’t be opened in front of your family.
61. You know exactly which of your friends are allergic to latex.
62. Your vanilla friends ask why they are never invited to your parties.
63. The movie “Swingers” was a huge disappointment to you.
64. It’s an unwritten law that you can’t call any of your friends on Saturday or Sunday until at least 3 p.m. so you don’t wake them up.
65. You’ve become especially good at operating your digital camera with one hand.
66. You actually installed a lock on a bedroom closet door that holds your sex-swing and other fun stuff.
67. You’re constantly afraid that visiting relatives will turn on one of your home videos you forgot to hide.
68. You make bets about how long it will take to “convert” your vanilla friend.
69. You’re in a public place and you swear you hear someone shout your screen name.
70. Before introducing them to your visiting family, you pull your friends aside and decide …” Here’s how we know each other…”
71. You start having withdrawals if the swinger’s web site is down.
72. When someone asks where you’re staying on your trip to Cancun, you pretend that you can’t remember the name of the resort.
73. You ask a guy to teach you “That thing you do with your fingers that my wife enjoys so much.”
74. In the middle of sex with your spouse, you ask someone else to take over for a minute while you go to the restroom.
75. You are more concerned about a pimple on your privates than on your face.
76. You come back from vacation and you have a tan, but no tan lines.
77. The first thing you do checking into a hotel is to ask for a lot of extra towels.
78. All the men bring their wives to your bachelor party.
79. Making it an early night means getting home before 3 a.m.
80. You’ve handed out business cards that have nothing to do with your occupation.
81. Your sexual fantasies never last very long… Because they keep coming true!
82. You are hanging around vanilla friends and you absentmindedly squeeze their butts.
83. You erase your computer’s browser history and cache every time you leave your office.
84. You buy lap dances for your wife… And vice versa.
85. You own a double-headed dildo.
86. You’re still smiling on Monday morning about something you did on Saturday night.
87. You’re at the market, and the only things in your basket are condoms, lube and Red Bull.
88. On vacation you set aside time to take pictures that are actually acceptable to show to your family.
89. After 25 years, people still ask if you’re newlyweds.
90. You’ve had sex with more people since you’ve been married than you did when you were single.
91. Going to vanilla bars ranks right up there with a root canal.
92. The only time you go out with your vanilla friends is when you’re on your period.
93. Your husband has lipstick on his collar and he smells like another woman’s perfume and it brings a smile to your face.
94. On Monday morning you are glad to go back to work so you can get some rest.
95. You tell your friends not to call while your parents are in town.
96. You never make it to the drive-thru before they quit serving breakfast, on your way home.
97. You have an entire external hard-drive devoted to nothing but your party photos.
98. You spouse is having an orgasm, while you are busy in the other room discussing the stock market.
99. You spent twice as long on your profile than you did on your resume.
100. You laughed out loud at 25 or more of these

Connection

Fic Request: oh goodness someone should do a fic when it’s the soul mates au where your soul mates name comes in like a tattoo on your wrist. and lydia obvs gets stile’s name doesn’t know it’s stile’s bc it’s his real name. so she like goes up to stile’s about it and he has a minor freak out.

Rating: T

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Soulmate!AU

Author: dylanhun

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3

hello fellow tumblr people,

this is going to be one of the most personal things i’ve posted in awhile. So, today is #noshameday , which is a day to acknowledge those in the disabled community, because unfortunately, we go unheard and unnoticed a lot of the time. 

My  name’s Danyelle, I’m  currently 18 and I have irritable bowel syndrome, non-alcoholic fatty liver disease, scoliosis, scheuermanns disease, type 2 diabetes, hypothyroidism, hidradenitis suppurativia, asthma, + polycystic ovarian syndrome.
Quite a mouthful, huh? Not really sure how to go about this post so please bear with me!

visible disabilities :

We discovered all this lovely stuff around the time I was 8. it started with the discoloration you see in my armpit. We thought it was a rash, but it actually has to do with being insulin resistant. (ties in with my type 2 diabetes) the discoloration is in my groin, and around the back of my neck. It feels very odd to purposely be posting a picture of it because in all my other selfies I try SO hard to hide it. Summer is always full of anxiety because of it. When I was in elementary school, Kids used to think it was dirt and make fun of me. The other thing, if you haven’t noticed,  is there is a huge scar across my armpit (its on the other one too) I have a skin disease called HS and the flares you get from those almost resemble a boil but under the skin. I’ve been dealing with that since I was 11. At the age of 16 I had to have surgery on my armpits to remove all of them. I won’t go in to detail but the recovery process after the surgery was brutal. Let’s just say it had to heal with open stitches. I had literal hoes in my arm pits. Yeah, good times. 

The third picture is to show the disfigurement of my back. I have scoliosis and scheuermann’s. Scoliosis is curves of the spine. I have two, one is 39 degrees, and the one in the lower lumbar area is 20 degrees. Scheuermann’s is another form of disfigurement. Its really hard to explain, Here’s a quote from wikipedia. –  “ Scheuermann’s disease describes a condition where the vertebrae grow unevenly with respect to the sagittal plane; that is, the posterior angle is often greater than the anterior. This uneven growth results in the signature “wedging” shape of the vertebrae “ 
Living with these two things have caused me so many problems. I am in pain constantly. And trying to find clothes can be almost impossible. I can only where sports bras because I can not find a “regular” bra with a big enough band to accommodate my curve. Dress shopping for school dances or anything was hell. It’s little things like that which make me feel “not normal”. And once again, I can’t believe I’m posting a picture of my back on purpose, because I always try to hide my back and posture in photos. 

Invisible disabilities 

when I was around 13 I had a colonoscopy to try and determine why the hell my stomach was giving me so much trouble. I was diagnosed with Irritable bowel syndrome. IBS ruined my schooling. I missed half the year, EVERY YEAR in middle school. In high school I decided to just get my GED because It was too much for me, and the school did NOT accommodate me as they should have. They thought I was lying, exaggerating, just didnt feel like going to class. IBS is something you deal with every day. Granted, some days are better than others but its constantly in the back of your mind. 

Depression, and anxiety had also started to take over my life around the time I left school, which as most of you guys know from my blog, I still struggle with mental illness to this day. 

Around the time they found the discoloration of my skin, someone decided we should do blood work and check everything out. I was diagnosed with non-alcoholic fatty liver disease. I had a liver biopsy to get more information. We then found out my liver enzymes were high enough that I was looking at a future liver transplant. Which luckily never happened because I managed to get it under control, but that took years. no one I knew my age had these “problems.” I couldn’t relate to other kids. We also found out from the results of that blood work that my thyroid was barely functioning, aka hypothyroidism.  and to top it off I had been officially diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. My blood sugar was and is all over the place. My doctors want to put me on insulin but are actually giving me one more shot (no pun intended) to try and get my blood sugar down on my own. I am slightly terrified. 

at 14 I was told I had polycystic ovary syndrome. I hadn’t had a period before, and once again they did bloodwork, and found out I have a hormone imbalance- too many male hormones. Which causes facial hair (I’m very lucky that I don’t have this any worse than I do.) and that explains why I don’t have regular periods. When I do get a period, it feels like I’m being attacked from the inside. Almost like my body doesn’t understand what the hells going on. 

,After going to the emergency room 5 times for a nebulizer they diagnosed me with asthma decided to prescribe an inhaler- finally. 

and last but not least the reasoning behind the medicine picture

This was to put it into a visual. All of it. I take so many medicines every single day. It’s taken me years to accept that I need medicine to basically function, and thats okay. I am so proud of myself for coming this far. It has been anything but easy. I have to constantly remind myself that I am beautiful.That I can still be unproportioned, have discoloration, and multiple other things- and still be beautiful. My disabilities don’t make me any less. 

I don’t talk about them as often as I should. I have so many friends who don’t even know all of this about me. Without meaning to, I hide my disabilities as often as possible. That is what we are taught in society. Well, fuck that. 

Here’s to every single one of you that has been made to feel like a burden, who have been constantly told if you just lose weight everything will be fixed,, who has dealt with the school and been treated like shit. To those who can’t get out of bed most of the time, and to those who still try too. You’re all my fucking hero’s. 

(Translation) Otona Kareshi After - Black [+ tokuten]

オトナカレシ After - Black (R18! Proceed only if you’re above 18!)

CV. Tachibana Shinnosuke


T/N: A part of a commission which includes the After - White volume and the After - Black tokuten. (I’ve queued the White translation, it should be published later). Thanks for the commission!

Use CTRL+F to skip to tokuten. And like always, liberties are taken so feel free to correct me for any mistakes. Enjoy!

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Fresh Start - Thanksgiving

A/N: Part 18 of the Fresh Start series. This is a mechanic!Dean x Single mom!Reader AU. We’re gonna start time jumping now, so this is a thanksgiving chapter. I’m sorry if some of this thanksgiving celebration is wrong, but we don’t celebrate where I’m from so. A huge thanks to my beta @thorne93. Happy reading y’all!

Characters: Dean x Reader, Sam, Jess, Mary, Balthazar, Lexi (OFC mentioned) Beth and John (children)

Warnings: Fluff, a tinsy bit of angst. Implied smut. And probably language.

Wordcount: 3576 (sorry)


Originally posted by black-little-demons

October turned into November and Thanksgiving was just around the corner. You and Dean were better than ever. Bringing him to Cas’ grave and shoving him around in the town you had grown up had brought you two closer. Since then he spent most night’s at your place. He and Beth were getting closer too, and you loved watching their relationship grow. The only bump in the road was Balthazar. He came back just a few days after he left, much to Dean’s dismay, and had taken up residence on your couch again. Had you known he was gonna be your roommate you would have gotten a house with a guest room.

Two days ago you had finally worked up the nerve to talk to him about the living arrangements, trying to let him know that you loved having him around but you felt like your house was a little crowded. He had agreed, he even admitted that he had been searching for an apartment he could stay in while he was here. His job really didn’t require him to be in New York at all times so he wanted to split his time between here and there. It made you happy that he would still be near by.

Today he dragged you with him to look at a few apartments down town. You didn’t even look at all of them before he had signed a lease.

“So what do you think? Honest opinion please,” he said lightly as the two of you walked down a busy street. People hurrying along, getting their shopping done for Thanksgiving. “Earth to (YN).” He chuckled when he noticed you weren’t paying attention to him at all.

Your eyes were fixed on a ‘For Sale’ sign in an empty window. “Yeah, awesome,” you answered him, not really knowing what he had asked. You peered through the window to see a large open space, only disrupted by a few columns stretching from floor to ceiling. Your brain started working, imagining the possibilities this place offered.

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13 years or 2 days

Sebastian Stan x reader

Warnings: fairly big age gap (13 years), some fluff, some angst


There was no secret that you and Sebastian had a very large age-gap in your relationship. In fact, he was 13 years older than you.

You had met him at comic-con (where else?), you made a smart-ass comment in Romanian while taking a picture with him, he was intrigued by your attitude, and snuck his number onto your photo. You were 5 days shy of being 19 at the time.

Now it was 2 years later, you and Sebastian had gone public with your relationship when you were 19 and a half, but you did not disclose your age. However, people were good. Your age came out almost 2 days later.

People constantly argued your relationship. It was wrong. It was perverted. It was this. It was that. It was always brought up in interviews, and today was no exception.

You were in New York for Sebastian’s Today Show appearance. You had come down with a cold on the flight here, so you would sit the interview out at the hotel, instead of accompanying him like usual. Sebastian had left a little over an hour ago and the interview was going to start after this commercial break.

You laid in bed in your robe, a cup of iced ginger ale on one side table and a dehumidifier on the other. The TV was on, showing the live channel and you watched as they introduced Sebastian, talking about Civil War and Bucky. Then they got to the real questions.

“So has your relationship with Y/N changed during shooting? Has communication become harder or is she out being an average 21 year old woman going to parties every night?” The question was meant to be harmless, but you could see the little twinge of anger flash in Seb’s eyes.

“No, our relationship’s still going strong, she’ll come to set with me somedays and she gets along real great with the cast, so it works out well. She takes online college courses.” The interviewer seemed unphased by his answer.

”Does it bother you that she was only 18 when you guys met?” You rolled your eyes and watched Seb’s jaw tighten as your phone rang. You picked it up, not taking your eyes off the TV.

“Hello?”

“Speaking of getting along with the cast…” You heard his unmistakable voice and a huge grin came onto your face.

“Mackie! You’re seeing this, too?”

“Yeah, I’m holed up at the airport and watching it. It’s bull, Y/N. Don’t let it bother you. People just want to get a rise out of Stan because it would make headlines everywhere.”

“I just wish they would stop asking, ya know? It’s been 2 years, I thought the controversy was supposed to die down by now. I’m 21, for god’s sake. I’m young, but I’m not a child.” You groaned, throwing your head back onto the headboard, and then wincing.

“Your relationship’s never gonna stop breaking news, someone’s always gonna have something to say. Anyways, I just wanted to tell you to keep your head up. Sebastian loves you and so does the rest of the cast. We got your back.”

You smiled, “Thanks, Mack. I appreciate it.”

“Anytime, Y/L/N. My flight’s here, I’ll catch you later.” You said bye to Anthony and hung up the phone, smiling. You continued watching the interview for a little while, but they just kept drilling Sebastian about you. 

“There are so many beautiful women in Hollywood that are your age, what’s keeping you with a kid like her?” Your jaw dropped at the interviewer’s audacity. Angry tears pricked at your eyes and you considered throwing your ginger ale at the screen. Luckily, the rational part of you took over and you simply shut the TV off, Sebastian would fill you in on the rest of the interview when he got back. You began to feel nauseous, groaning and willing it to go away as you rested your head against the soft hotel pillows. You thought about calling Anthony again, but he would have already taken off by now.

You turned onto your side, tucking the blanket up to your nose and doing your damn best to not let the tears fall, to no avail. 

You don’t know how long you were in bed with tears slowly and silently streaming down your cheeks when you heard the hotel room door open and close. You sat upright in bed and quickly flicked your tears away as Sebastian was turned towards the door and locking it. “Hi, honey.”

He turned to you and looked up, “Hey babe,” then he noticed the your red eyes and matching cheeks. “What’s wrong?” He came and sat on the edge of the bed, tilting your chin up for your eyes to meet his gaze. You looked at him and sniffed, trying your best to avoid his concerned gaze.

“Why me?” He instantly knew what you were talking about and he mentally cursed the ignorant interviewer.

“Oh, Y/N. Don’t let that stupid jackass get to you. We know we have quite the age gap, but has anyone other than people who don’t know us said anything bad about us? Nobody has because everyone loves you, nobody sees you as a kid. You’re 21 years old, you’re in college, you’re taking control of your life. I love you, whether we’re 13 years apart in age or 2 days. You were 19 when we started dating so it’s not a legal issue. The only people that have a problem with us are the people who don’t know us.”

You silently moved over in bed and he climbed in with you, pulling you into his chest and placing soft kisses on your forehead. He was right and you felt stupid for letting that jerk getting to you when you really knew what was going on. “Besides, I think he got fired as I walked off set.”


I don’t know how I feel about this one?? Felt a little weird writing it, but it seemed like a good idea when I started it. I’ll put it out anyways. Enjoy.

Nineteen Years Later- Chris Evans One Shots

Pairing: Chris Evans X Reader

Prompt: You are a senior in high school with Chris and have known him for years. When he asks you to prom, you accept; only to be threatened by his psycho ex-girlfriend, who forced you to leave him alone without explanation on the night of prom. Then, nineteen years later, you meet him again when Sebastian Stan hires you as his personal assistant.

Word Count: 3280 (I really got into this one & it’s just super long)

A/N: Inspired by Chris’ interview with The Talk where he says he asked this girl to prom and she ditched him on prom night. I changed what happened, but it is the based off his (heartbreaking) real-life experience. And I totally almost cried realizing nineteen years ago, Chris was 18 (for my non-Potterheads, the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows epilogue scene takes place 19 years later when Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Draco send their kids off on the Hogwarts Express).

~~~

Spring was a hectic season for all sorts of reasons. The school year was almost through and everyone was getting antsy to leave. AP tests were also approaching, which caused some students to stress out a lot. But, the main reason spring was so crazy was that prom was right around the corner. Prom was currently the talk of the whole school; who was going with who, who was wearing what color, and who would win prom queen and prom king. In two weeks, seniors would attend their final prom. You were a senior and were also anxiously awaiting for someone to ask you.

“Guess who just got asked to prom?” Your friend asked you, coming up to you in the hallway.

“Who asked you?” You replied, a smile growing on your face.

“Toby.” She grinned. She had liked him for ages; therefore, you were happy for her.

“That’s amazing.” You stated, closing your locker and you two began to walk down the halls to class.

“Have you been asked yet?” She questioned you.

“No.” You shook you head, “I’m thinking I might as well just stay home. It seems like all the good dates are taken.” You laughed.

“Hey, Y/N.” You looked over to see Chris as he passed you. He smiled and waved.

“Hi, Chris.” You replied.

“Maybe Chris will ask you.” Your friend said once he was out of earshot.

“Isn’t he dating Georgia?” You asked.

“Rumor is they broke up.” She answered. Before you could say anymore, your friend bid you farewell and vanished into her next class. You went next door to your classroom.

You had known Chris for years, being neighbors that had windows facing each other and all. You two were friends, although you rarely talked anymore. Every girl in school seemed to have even a slight crush on him, you included. He was friendly and charming, not to mention getting more attractive each year.

When you got home that day, you instantly went to your room, preparing to work on your Stats homework. There was a knock on your window and you stood from your desk to open it. You moved the curtain and unlocked the window, forcing it open. Chris had developed a form of talking to you by throwing something small at your window and beckoning you to open it; so, it didn’t shock you when he was standing in his room with his window open as well.

“What’s up?” You asked him.

“Just a lot on my mind.” He replied, “Have you been asked yet?”

“To prom?” You clarified and he nodded, “Nope.”

“Do you want to go with me then?” Chris asked with his classic, heartwarming smile.

“What about Georgia?”

“We broke up.” He shrugged, seemingly unaffected by it.

“Then, sure, I’ll go with you.” You said, making his smile grow wider.

“Great.” Chris replied.

~~~

The day before prom was quite possibly the worst day of your life. Chris was absent from school-he had told you it dealt with his grandparents. You two never really agreed on whether or not you were going to prom as friends or a couple-he never asked you, therefore you assumed it was purely platonic. Over the past few weeks, your friend had been hanging out with Toby, leaving you all alone. The school was flying with talk of you and Chris, how upset Georgia was that he broke up with her and how you apparently convinced him to do it. Everyone seemed to be on her side, believing you caused the ‘it’ couple’s break-up, and the judging glares followed you through the hallways. You desperately wanted to leave, but your parents would never allow you to miss school and still make it to prom.

The whispers and stares weren’t the worst part. Even the occasional food thrown at you and the harsh words sent your way weren’t the defining part of the day. It was when you got cornered in the girl’s bathroom. Someone had purposefully spilt some of their milkshake on you, sending you to the restroom to clean up.

“Lookie here, the boyfriend-stealing slut.” You cringed upon hearing the head cheerleader’s voice. Georgia just seemed to have issues letting go.

“I didn’t do anything, Georgia.” You replied, focusing on the developing stain on your shirt.

“Don’t act all innocent. Everyone knows you’ve had a thing for him since middle school.”

“Can’t you just leave me alone and find someone else to bully?” You asked.

“No, that wouldn’t be as much fun.” She stated, crossing her arms in front of her chest. The two girls from her posse behind her did the same, “How about we make a deal?”

“It depends.” You said. She smirked, pulling out a folder from her backpack.

“You leave Chris and don’t go to prom with him, or else the whole school sees this.” She handed it to you and you cautiously opened it. Of course, Georgia happened to find at least twenty, or more, embarrassing photos of you.

“How did you get these?” You asked, tears beginning to fill your eyes.

“It doesn’t matter. Go to prom with Chris and everyone sees them. And you can never speak of this to him.”

“You’re horrible.” You croaked.

“Do we have a deal?” Georgia asked, sticking out a hand to you. Her other hand snatched the folder from you and she gave it to a girl in her posse. You reluctantly shook her hand and you watched as she left the bathroom. You had just sold your soul to the devil and now you couldn’t even go to your prom.

~~~

The next night, you stood in your room, pacing up and down it. You had yet to devise a way to tell Chris that you couldn’t go with him. Your prom dress was laying on your bed, glaring at you for your childish deal with Georgia. You had told yourself years ago to never be intimidated by the others around you, but somehow that courage slipped away from you yesterday.

After pacing around your room for a solid ten minutes instead of getting ready, you looked up and noticed Chris’ shadow in his room. He seemed to be dancing as he got ready. You felt tears begin to form in your eyes at the thought of ditching him. You closed your curtains and sat on your desk. You grabbed a blank piece of paper and began to write on it.

'I am so sorry to tell you like this. I can’t go to prom with you tonight. Please don’t be mad at me.’

You folded it and wrote across the top: 'To Chris’. You went downstairs and to his family’s house. You set the small letter down on the doorstep and knocked on the door. You hurried back to your house and the safety of your room.

Five minutes later, your doorbell went off, signaling someone was at the front door. You immediately knew it was Chris. You rushed out of your room to the landing.

“Mom, don’t let him in. I’m not going to prom.” You whisper-shouted to her down the stairs. Her hand was on the door handle, about to open it. She silently nodded, although she didn’t know your reasoning, and you disappeared back to your room.

“Hello, Mrs. Y/L/N. Is Y/N home? Can I speak with her?” You heard Chris ask.

“I’m sorry, no. She’s out at the moment with her father.” Your mother replied. You heard the door shut a moment later. You sighed in relief, knowing he had left. You heard the sound of tapping on your window. Now he was throwing pebbles at it. You ignored the light noise as you desperately tried to focus on something else.

You told your friend the next day about everything that had happened. She comforted you through it all. Georgia stopped spreading rumors about you, although some were still swirling around the school. Chris straight up ignored you and you couldn’t blame him. You ditched him without reason on the night of prom. The fact that they were both crowned Prom Queen and King only made your heart heavier with sorrow-the whole school believed they were perfect together, you never stood a chance. Luckily, there was only six weeks left in the school year, meaning six more weeks until you would never see 99% of them again.

~~~

~19 years later~

You’d be lying if you said your prom night didn’t still haunt you. What made it even worse was that Chris became a big name actor and his face was practically everywhere, especially in New York City. It seemed like there was always an ad with his face on it somewhere; and now, with his premiere occurring this weekend, the photos seemed to multiply. No matter how acclaimed his movies were, you stayed away from them. It was too hard to see him everywhere you went, knowing that you hurt him so much back in high school.

While he became an actor, you became a personal assistant. It didn’t pay much to be a glorified secretary, but you didn’t mind. It was a job you were good at and got stuck with. Despite living in the Big Apple, you were still close to your best friend from high school. She was now married to Toby, her prom date, and baby number two was on it’s way. You were slightly jealous of her stable relationship and the family she was having.

Unfortunately, your dull life seemed to be getting worse. Your boss decided he no longer needed an assistant and fired you. That led to you sitting in a coffee shop, reading a newspaper and looking for any job offers. Everything seemed to be only part-time. You were already struggling with paying your rent and you couldn’t afford to have a part-time job. You got up from your seat and threw away your coffee. When you turned to leave, you ran into someone, dropping your newspaper.

“I’m so sorry. I wasn’t watching where I was going.” The person said. They leaned down and grabbed your paper and handed it to you. You had to restrain yourself from running away when you recognized him. You may have never seen a Captain America movie, but you knew who he was and how close he was to Chris. He was Sebastian Stan-the man you used to watch on Gossip Girl.

“It was my fault. I’ve been a bit out of it all day.” You replied.

“Are you job searching?” He asked, pointing to the part of the newspaper that was highlighted in yellow and circled with red pen.

“Yes. I got fired today actually. I was a personal assistant.” You explained.

“Really? You’re a personal assistant? Mine just quit today. I have to be somewhere in about ten minutes, but maybe we could have an interview.” He offered, “I’m Sebastian, by the way.”

“Y/N.” You replied, shaking his outstretched hand, “That’s really kind of you to offer a job to a complete stranger.”

“Do you have a business card? Or any way I could contact you?” He asked. In your mind, you saw him as desperate for an assistant; but, yet again, he probably had a very busy life and needed one around. You gave him your information before both of you left the coffee shop.

He called you later that day and set up an interview over lunch with you the next day. If you ended up getting the job, you hoped you wouldn’t see Chris-or at least that he didn’t recognize or remember you. It was risky to work with Sebastian, but you desperately needed the money.

You met Sebastian at the small restaurant and he asked you simple questions. You were surprised that he was the one interviewing for a personal assistant and not his manager, but you suppose it makes sense since you will be assisting him and no one else. The interview went smoothly and you eventually got off topic to the point where it seemed like two friends having lunch.

“Hold on, I need to take this.” Sebastian said, getting a call halfway through lunch. He left the table for a few minutes before coming back.

“Is everything all right?” You asked.

“Yeah, it’s just my friend, Chris, is in town for the week. His car just got towed and he’s lost in the city, so I’ve got to pick him up. I really enjoyed having lunch with you. You’re a great candidate and I’ll be in touch with you.” He explained, putting some money on the table to pay for the bill. You left when he did and you went back to your little apartment, trying not to think back to that night nineteen years ago.

~~~

It didn’t take long for Sebastian to call you again. He hired you the day after lunch and you were needed that night for his premier. You didn’t need to do anything, but he wanted you to attend so you at least knew what it was like being a celebrity’s assistant instead of a business man’s.

“So when I was doing a background check on you, I noticed you went to the same high school as Chris Evans. Do you know him? You two would have been there at the same time.” Sebastian asked you. You were sitting in his hotel room as his hairstylist fixed his long hair.

“Yes, I did know him back at school.” You nodded.

“Was he super popular or a giant nerd?” He laughed, thinking of what his friend would be like in high school.

“He was popular, but he was nice. Everyone loved him.” You stated, trying  not to sound super upset about the conversation. Sebastian noticed how your hands started to shake, so he reached forward and took them in his.

“Was high school rough for you? It was terrible for me. I tried so hard to fit in, but I was from Romania. People saw me as the weird kid, but it’s just something I had to get used to. I wasn’t going to fit in and that’s alright. I wouldn’t be who I am today if I did.” He said, trying to calm you down.

“I’m sorry. I’d just rather not think about it.” You replied.

“Are you excited for tonight? Have you seen any of the other movies?” Sebastian asked and you shook your head.

“I think I’m more nervous than excited. I never got around to watching any Marvel movies, but I’m sure they’re all fantastic.” You said. There was a knock on Sebastian’s hotel room door.

“Come in.” Sebastian answered and the door swung open, revealing the one and only Chris Evans in his suit, seemingly ready for the premier. The only thing missing was his socks and shoes.

“Do you have another pair of black socks? I only brought one black sock, or at least that’s all I can find.” Chris asked, not noticing you in the room and for that you were thankful.

“Yeah, there should be some more in my bag.” Sebastian said, pointing to the black bag at the foot of his bed. Chris went over there and dug into it. He found a pair of socks and smiled triumphantly.

“Thanks, Seabass. You’re a life saver.” He stated.

“Hey, Chris, meet my new personal assistant,” Sebastian spoke up before the other man could leave. You mentally slapped your new boss for pointing you out. Maybe taking this job wasn’t such a good idea. Chris went to turn around and froze upon hearing your name, “Y/N Y/L/N. She went to high school with you.”

“Y/N?” Chris mumbled, turning around to face you completely.

“Hi, Chris.” You whispered. You could see Sebastian’s face of realization. It all clicked to him; you didn’t want to talk about Chris or high school and you were tense when he appeared in the room. The Romanian immediately realized his mistake, believing he had just hired his friend’s ex as his assistant.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Chris asked.

“Sebastian just hired me.” You replied.

“I’m sorry. Are you two exes?” Sebastian asked, genuinely trying to learn the truth between you and his friend. You looked from your boss to Chris.

“Chris, can we talk in private, please?”

“Fine.” He nodded and walked out of the room. You silently followed him.

“Why are you really here?” He questioned, angrily.

“I live in the city.” You stated.

“It’s been nearly twenty years and you just pop up here. You’ve ignored me that long, why now?”

“I didn’t search you out, if that’s what you’re implying, and you’re the one that began to ignore me first.” You said, raising your voice.

“You dumped me. What was I supposed to do?” He asked, balling his fists.

“We weren’t even dating and I had to. You don’t understand.”

“Then make me understand.” Chris demanded.

“It was Georgia.” You confessed. The anger had left you and you were on the verge of tears now. All of your emotions from previous years were built up and spilling out in front of him. Chris, on the other hand, kept his fists balled in anger.

“What do you mean it was Georgia?” He questioned.

“She came to that Friday and told me to leave you. She blackmailed me, Chris. I truly didn’t mean to hurt you and I was going to tell you, but you wouldn’t give me the time of day.” You begged, “I never wanted to hurt you. Please believe me.” You said. He stayed quiet and only looked at you with an angry stare.

“I’m sorry, Chris. That’s all I can say. I was stupid and scared. You can have Sebastian fire me or I can quit if you don’t want me around. Just know that I really liked you back then and I think I still do. I would never intentionally hurt you.” You stated after a few moments of silence. You turned around to head back inside, but you were stopped by Chris finally moving. He put his hand on your shoulder and turned you to face him. His lips fell onto yours and his hands cupped your cheeks as he kissed you. It was then that every ounce of feeling from nineteen years ago came back.

“I’ve been wanting to do that since third grade.” Chris admitted, when he finally let go of you, “I’m so sorry for what Georgia did to you and I’m so sorry that I was a jerk to you all those years ago.”

“You’re not the one who should be apologizing.” You stated.

“Let’s start over.” He suggested, sticking out a hand to you, “I’m Chris Evans and I’ve had a crush on you since elementary school.”

“I’m Y/N Y/L/N and I’ve liked you since middle school.” You laughed, shaking his hand. The weight of the world was lifted off your shoulders as that hand shake sparked the new beginning between you and Chris, taking away the pain of the past.

Welcome to the Con Part 28 (final)

Originally posted by bilosan

Originally posted by yourfavoritedirector

Summary: Your friend Lauren and yourself are having the best time at a Supernatural convention. You meet Jared and Jensen in the photo op, and they’re just as awesome as you imagined. Jensen is charming and you seem to click right away. But as life goes, you sadly have to say goodbye. During the panel, however, the unexpected happens….

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14 Part 15  Part 16  Part 17  Part 18 Part 19  Part 20 Part 21  Part 22  Part 23  Part 24  Part 25  Part 26 Part 27

A/N: This is it! Here we are at the end of the story. It’s taken me about 11 months to write, and I’m tearing up a little as I write this. Thank you all so much for the love and support while I was writing this, it means a lot. I love y’all and I hope you like it! <3


“Holy shit Y/N, we’re about to meet them!”

Lauren exclaimed.

“I know! We’d better not embarrass ourselves because I spent far too much money to look back on this and cringe.”

“Oh don’t worry, you’re always more relaxed about these things than I am.”

“I don’t know, I’m about to meet Jensen and Jared. if I faint, you’d better catch me.”

You smile at the memory, walking by where the photo op line will be in an hour or so. You can hardly believe that it’s been five years.

“Dadadadada.”

“Yeah Violet, we’re at Daddy’s convention. Welcome to the con peanut, you’ll probably come to more as you get older.”

Your daughter continues to babble as you push her stroller to the panel stage. Security directs you backstage, and you can already see the crowd of your friends. On one side, Rob and Matt are talking animatedly about something. Off to their left, Misha and Mark are laughing. In front of you and a bit to the right, your husband, Jared and Richard are talking in a loosely formed triangle. You pick up Violet from the stroller, balancing her comfortably on your hip. When she sees her dad, a big smile spreads across her face.

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Chronological List of Kastle & Kastle Important Scenes

Complete with brief scene overviews and approximate episode timestamps!

For @thekastlediaries and the rest of the kastle fam! Tbh I had 99% of this post already saved on my computer for rewatching purposes; I just reorganized it and found the timestamps real quick, lol.

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things that need to be addressed: x-men apocalypse and jubilation lee

spoilers about jubilee’s role. i just can’t keep it in anymore, and i am not sorry. 

NOT below the cut because people need to see this. this needs to be addressed. 

okay. so here’s the deal. i have loved the x-men, however vaguely, since i was about 8 years old. i grew up on the original x movies from the 2000s.

when it was first announced that the ‘new kids’ in xmen would involve the much-loved favourite characters from the old movies (scott summers, ororo munroe aka storm, and jean grey) i was SO excited. because yes, they’re coming back, my favourite characters are coming back into the franchise. but the one announcement that got me the most excited i have ever been in terms of a superhero movie was the announcement that lana condor would play jubilation lee aka jubilee. because yes, an asian superhero has been cast correctly and she is going to be in this huge feature film and people will FINALLY start to recognise asians in the entertainment industry.

now, i’ll admit, i didn’t know much about jubilee before this announcement. i knew her name, that she’s asian, and that was about it; if i’m being honest, i still don’t know that much about her. but the fact that she is a young, female asian superhero was enough to get me excited - IS enough to get me excited. 

in the lead up to the film, there were set photos of lana as jubilee with the rest of the new kids in a mall, they had the typical press junkets, and promo interviews. but the biggest event of all: san diego comic con. hall h. x-men apocalypse panel. and boy, oh boy, was i excited to see that lana condor was on the list of panelists. the general idea is that if you’re on the panel you’re going to play quite a significant role in the film, right? 

if i wasn’t excited already, i sure as hell was now. i hadn’t realised it then but seeing an asian actress play an asian character who happens to be a superhero in a franchise as big as x-men…it means a whole lot to me. asians don’t get represented much in popular culture, as we all know. people in colour never get enough well-deserved attention for their talents. but growing up the only asian influence i had in popular culture was mulan. that was it. mulan. thank god she was a badass. anyways, after mulan there really weren’t any asians in the western world - which i grew up in - that held the same status of a badass, kick-ass character, much less a FEMALE. so jubilee would be my first badass, kick-ass FEMALE SUPERHERO CHARACTER in 18 years. that’s my entire existence so far. it has taken the entire time of my existence so far for another pop-culturally significant asian character to make any sort of impact. 

so yeah. subconsciously i was excited as all hell. i was ready. my blood was pumping for representation.

then i got out of the movie. and my heart broke.

no, jubilee didn’t die. but she may as well have not been there at all. she was in the film for a total of maybe 10 minutes with about 5 lines of dialogue. and the mall scene was 100% cut from the film. she was there as a filler character. said a few things to scott, hung out with the rest of the new kids the ENTIRE TIME she was onscreen with no individual focus on her at all except maybe one line from (i think it was) jean who informs scott that jubilee is new at the school too. that’s it.

my heart was shattered. i was so excited. they had built up her role so much, they took lana condor to fucking SAN DIEGO COMIC CON for this movie.

i recently watched the cast interview at AOL build, and there’s a point where james is recounting a set story and the interviewer asks lana if she was there for the recounted events and lana replied very harshly, very snappily, “No, I wasn’t there for any of this” (paraphrased). and at first i was kind of shocked that she would respond like that, so rudely - and if she didn’t mean to come across like that, then my bad - but then it hit me: she is right to be angry. here she was, promised a role in a huge film that’s part of a huge franchise, sitting with her all-white cast members (barre alexandra shipp, who is fantastic as storm, by the way) who are all there to promote the film. the difference is, the rest of them were there to promote 2 and a half hours of their acting; lana was there to promote 10 minutes of her acting. in what world is that fair? 

i am heartbroken. i am livid. i am so, so disappointed. the worst part? the only thing i can do is hope and pray that she gets more screentime and dialogue in the next film - if there even is a next film, and if she’s even in the film. 

so don’t tell me that representation doesn’t matter. don’t tell me the entertainment industry is already diverse. don’t tell me that, after 18 years of waiting, i should just be happy that an asian woman is even in one of the most highly anticipated films of 2016. 

don’t tell me that i don’t have a right to be angry, because i have every right to be upset over the complete reduction of an incredible character into basically an extra with a few lines. 

especially when she is someone who represents a group of people who are consistently misrepresented and unrepresented in the entertainment industry.

Our Best Friend Wedding - Chapter One (Biadore) by Sadie

A/N.: Hey guys, this is my first sequel and I am bloody excited about that! I hope you like this as much as I did and I hope you like this chapter and let’s wait and see what chapter two will bring to Danny’s and Roy’s life together again! Love you all! Xx Sadie

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[TRANS] GONG CHAN SIK EXHIBITION (V-App)

Introduction

Hello, I am B1A4′s Gongchan. It’s 1am and late but you were surprised right? I notified you on Twitter. Firstly, there are people who will go to work tomorrow and students who will go to school. Thank you for watching me on V-App so late. 

Hmm, now it’s time for me to explain. Yesterday on the 23rd, after 12, my first exhibition reached its conclusion. Clap clap~ everyone clap! There are people who know and those who don’t, so I will explain. For my birthday, from August 14th to 23rd, we had a photography exhibition on the 1st floor of WM Entertainment. It was short, and there are fans outside the city, as well as international fans who wanted to but could not attend. So, through this behind-story on V-App, I wanted to greet you. Woo~ Through this exhibition, I wanted to share photos I took in my daily life with our fans. Muahaha. How is it everyone, do you like it? Wow~ Then, thank you for watching this late at night. Let’s start right now. Focus on the photos now, please.  

Tadah~ When you enter the front doors of the building, you’ll see the poster for the exhibition. The moon, and “Gong Chan Sik Exhibition”, and the dates. Kyah. Now, let’s begin~

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There are a lot of things in life we should be happy about but we don’t appreciate them because we just take them for granted.

That’s why I decided to make a list of 100 things everyone should start appreciating more!

1. a compliment from a stranger
2. fresh cut fruit
3. opening a brand new book
4. classic disney movies
5. friendly cashiers
6. fuzzy socks
7. making someone else smile
8. a clean public restroom
9. being the only one to know a secret
10. old couple that are holding hands
11. being able to finally understand something
12. getting enough sleep
13. when strangers thank you after you held the door for them
14. making a perfect signature
15. having a blank to-do list
16. looking through old photos
17. finding a username that isn’t taken
18. a hot shower on a cold day
19. a cold shower on a hot day
20. getting positive feedback on something you worked hard on
21. when someone remembers something you said a long time ago
22. people who accept your and don’t care about your flaws
23. being with the person you love
24. those friends that are always there for you
25. spending time with your family
26. the smell after the rain
27. looking through schoolwork from when you were young
28. fresh-baked bread
29. sleeping on freshly washed sheets
30. seeing someone’s face light up when you give them a present
31. holding hands
32. not having a bad hair day
33. driving down an empty road
34. putting in the last piece of a puzzle
35. when a baby holds your finger
36. people who accept your weirdness
37. songs that bring back memories
38. the sound of uncontrollable laughter
39. finally finding that missing sock
40. hugs from behind
41. texts from your loved one
42. when people remember you after only having met you once
43. doing well on a test you didn’t study for
44. looking at raindrops that are rolling down your car’s windows
45. when you go to your favorite band’s concert and they finally come on stage
46. the smell of breakfast in the morning
47. kisses on the forehead
48. making a baby laugh
49. watching shows from your childhood
50. being wrapped in a blanket on a rainy/snowy day
51. being loved
52. being liked by the family of your significant other
53. stargazing
54. long, tight hugs
55. kept promises
56. getting mail
57. putting on warm clothes that come right out of the dryer
58. getting new clothes
59. wearing your favorite piece of clothing and feeling beautiful in it
60. inside jokes
61. a smile from a stranger
62. getting lost in a really good book
63. making your parents proud
64. the smell of freshly cut grass
65. the cool side of the pillow
66. when someone tells you that they missed you
67. not having any work to do over the weekend
68. hot chocolate on cold days
69. popping bubble wrap
70. dimples
71. silence that isn’t awkward
72. cuddling
73. finding money in the laundry
74. unexpected presents
75. when someone defends you in an argument
76. the first rain after a long draught
77. having time for yourself
78. continuous green lights when you’re driving somewhere
79. the smell of a new book
80. friendly anons on tumblr
81. the sound of a cat purring
82. listening to a song from your childhood and still knowing the lyrics
83. good morning texts
84. a pen that works really well
85. taking a nap
86. singing in the shower
87. never ending conversations
88. Finding something you lost a long time ago
89. jeans that fit perfectly
90. deep conversations with your best friend
91. finally eating the food you’ve been craving
92. songs that make you want to dance
93. being in a great mood for no particular reason
94. waking up and realizing you have more time to sleep
95. when the team you’re rooting for wins
96. hearing that you were part of someone’s dream
97. when a little kid draws you a picture
98. realizing your period is finally over
99. correct grammar
100. finishing a final exam

“Mấy đứa nhỏ ở đây bác đều coi như con. Chúng nó cũng đều gọi bác là mẹ. Nhìn chúng nó yêu nhưng mà cũng tội lắm. Một số đứa về sau thì được bố mẹ nhận về nuôi, có đứa thì nuôi đến 18 tuổi thì thôi. Còn cả những đứa bị não nữa.

Nhiều đứa mới vào đây còn bé tý, sau này nó biết bố mẹ nó bỏ thì cũng căm giận bố mẹ. Có đứa còn bảo: ‘Sau này con mà gặp lại bố mẹ thì con chỉ muốn cầm dao đuổi bố mẹ, vì bỏ anh em con giữa trời mưa ngoài đường.’ Nhiều lúc bác thương chúng nó hơn cả con đẻ của mình. Làm ở đây lương thấp, cũng chẳng được bao nhiêu nhưng bác vẫn muốn ở lại. Mình làm vì cái tâm nữa mà!”

Ảnh chụp tại Trung tâm Bảo trợ Xã hội 3.

“I treat the kids here like my own children. They all call me mother. Lovely as they are, their circumstances are all quite pitiful. Some were eventually adopted and some were abandoned when they turned 18. A few have mental disabilities.

Many of them came in here when they’re just babies, when they found out that they were abandoned, they become resentful of their parents. One of them even said, 'If I ever meet them again, I’ll chase them down with a knife, I’ll make them pay for leaving us out in the street in the rain.’ Sometimes I love them even more than I love my own children. My job here doesn’t pay very well, but I still want to stay on. I work for the heart as well!”

Photo taken at Social Welfare Center 3.

songs from the deep

summary: Four years years ago, Marinette left Paris. Four years ago, Marinette left Ladybug behind. Four years ago, Marinette didn’t say goodbye. And now she’s going to pay the price. angstish ladynoir and marichat. au. older!marinette&adrien.

pairings: all the variations of marinette and adrien.

sidenote: this is my first time posting ml fic on tumblr so hhh im nervous oh well

fanfiction link

.

“Mom,” her voice croaked out, her hands reached forward to touch her mother’s face, afraid that she would fade into the pale sheets of the hospital bed if she waited even a second longer.

“My daughter,” her mother gave her a watery, weak smile. “I’ve missed you.”

“Me too,” Marinette gasped, seeing her strong mother in such an ardent state of weakness set her eyes ablaze, it wasn’t fair, it wasn't fair - “I didn’t mean to leave so suddenly, I’m sorry-”

“Shhh,” her mother consoled, lightly sliding her hand across her daughter’s silky, long hair, now dipping to her lower back versus the way it used to sweep across her shoulders before she left Paris. “You were chasing your dream, Marinette. I understand. I’m so - so proud-” her mother stopped speaking in order to cough violently, the sides of the bed shaking with her tremors. Tears shrouded Marinette’s vision and she frantically tried to swallow the harsh lump in her throat - she had to be strong, she had to be strong for her mother, and for her father, too.

“Mom, don’t worry - I’m gonna be here, right by your side,” she inhaled erratically between each word, struggling to maintain equilibrium in tone as tears threatened to spill down her cheeks.

Her mother’s hand lingered on her cheek and she gave her a grateful look. They could do it - together they could.

“Thank you, Marinette.” Her father told her after they had been excused from her mother’s room due to her exhaustion. His voice was whispery and hoarse. He’d been crying, too. “Thank you so much for coming, I know you’re busy, and I know you’re living your dream, but-”

“Dad,” Marinette interrupted him hastily, “it’s fine, I had to be here. I can work from Paris for the next few months, it’s fine, Miss Lenden approved it.”

Her dad smiled nostalgically. “Maybe I shouldn’t keep you then, I heard you’d rented an apartment? Are you sure you don’t want to stay at home? We can get your room ready-”

“It’s fine, I’ll be working late most nights anyways.” Marinette reassured him. It was true - it was hard enough getting an actual break from Miss Marina Lenden, world renowned fashion designer and diva - but after months and months of interning and pandering and holding her tongue, Marinette had climbed the ranks high enough to hold her position even in adversity. She’d survive - she always did.

“Goodnight, dad.” she told him tightly, wrapping her thin arms around his broad shoulders and pressing a loving kiss to his cheek. That was what she was here for. Support.

As she walked home from the hospital, streets lulled to sleep by the stars and eyes soaking up the sights of what she used to call her home, she watched the buildings pass with a lonely, longing regard. She’d missed Paris. She’d missed the sights, the smells, the feeling of the roofs under her feet as she’d swing from building to building - not a care to be spotted.

Back when she was Ladybug - so much more than plain, aspiring Marinette Dupain-Cheng, she seemed to hold the world in her hands back then, when she could be more focused on winning the heart of a simple boy than winning the trust of her employer.

Her life had been forever derailed since that day – four years ago. She had only been eighteen, but she knew. Paris couldn’t confine her, she needed to leave.

…And so, she did.

With spirited goodbyes that lasted as long as sugar tasted, she took the first train out of Paris, to Milan Italy, where she began working for her dream – to become a world famous fashion designer.

Of course, with four years in and nothing to show for it, that sailed her ship off course, but now that she was working under and closely with Marina Lenden…it was only a matter of time.

She just needed to wait for it.

Shadows danced across the windows of the buildings she passed, shapely, like they were moving on their own instead of with her.

And…she could’ve sworn, that just in the corner of her eye, a black cat patrolled the city – watching&protecting its claim. Now that brought back memories. Memories of the boy she never got to say goodbye to.

She glanced downward and sighed. That didn’t matter now. All she needed was her mother’s recovery, and enough time to make her mark on the world.

.

.

.

“Marinette,” Tikki warned, eyes hazy from the lack of sleep. “It’s 3 am – why are you still awake?”

Marinette blinked at the clock, surely she was mistaken.

The numbers glared brightly in contrast to the plain atmosphere of the apartment. 3:18.

“I…just need to finish this last document for Miss Lenden, then I can sleep.” She told her. Tikki sighed.

“You’ve been working so hard, you’re clearly stressed out. You should take a break and relax tomorrow.” Tikki advised her. Marinette gave her a small nod.

“That sounds amazing, but…” she trailed off, staring at the piles of papers spread thin across her desk. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to…”

Tikki jumped onto her shoulder and pressed her head up against Marinette’s neck. She sighed and patted her kwami on the head before yawning. The glaring streetlight had been itching at her eyes for the past hour, and she was aching to go to sleep, even though she still had a few more papers to sign off on…just a few more…

Her gaze flickered to her bed. But then again, just a few papers could wait until morning, right?

Deciding to heed Tikki’s advice, she stood up and stretched her weary limbs, before moving over to the shades to close them. Her hair, still curling from her shower (where she had cried for twenty minutes straight – seeing her mother so physically drained took a toll on her, too) swept across her shoulders and smelt like jasmine. At least she felt clean.

Her hand grazed the shades and she was about to pull them down before she stopped dramatically, staring up at the opposite building in awe.

A shadow stood at the top, standing tall and luminous, like a statue of grace.

-it was him.

It was him, it was him, it was him so he was still here, he stayed, he stayed to protect Paris.

He did what she failed to do.

It was him.

But he was different than she remembered.

Chat Noir – in her memories, at least – was still a bit fuzzy, like a smile, or a smell from your past that you can’t quite recall, but you still recognize it when it resurfaces.

She remembered Chat Noir to stand tall, cocky, confident, but this Chat Noir was different. Still tall, but more powerful – towering, almost, like Paris was his city – and it was his only job to keep it safe from harm. His hair was longer, too. He was powerful, and fierce – he was a lion.

She felt herself smile a little bit – he had grown up. He was strong, and he didn’t need her anymore.

Her smile faltered.

She wondered if he had forgiven her for what she’d done.

His stance changed and he leapt off the building, strong and graceful, before melting in with the shadows, dark as the sky itself.

She felt a sudden longing to chase after him – of all the things she’d left, he might’ve been her biggest regret. He’d trusted her – with his life, his heart – and yet, she’d had no trouble discarding that trust and leaving for Italy without so much as a wave goodbye.

She shut the windows tightly and choked on a dry sob, suddenly torn apart by regret.

She was so selfish she was Ladybug – Miraculous Ladybug, who now used her miraculous as no more than a decoration on her wall. She was a fraud. A failure. She’d failed her parents, her career, her friends, and she’d failed Chat Noir – who’d loyally stand by her side at anything.

Before leaving for Milan all those years ago – following the broken trail to a dream she’d never reach – she promised herself she’d never cry herself to sleep again.

She supposed that most promises were made to be broken, anyways.

.

.

.

By the time she had woken up the next day – she was already stressed out. She’d managed to finish signing all of the papers, but since she was still technically working she already had an assignment. Luckily, it was only about as stressful as a final exam that would ultimately decide whether you live or die. Excellent.

Paris fashion. She had to take photos of civilians. Sounds easy, right? Wrong.

Turns out, people in Paris aren’t really keen on letting strange girls take their picture! And even when she tells them not to worry, and that it’s for Marina Lenden of the Lenden Fashion Corporation, she only received scoffs and laughter.

Not to mention, taking pictures of people who were always on the move was really hard.

Luckily – she found her solace in the park. One she recognized from teenage years, watching, sitting, waiting for boys to walk by and fawn over them, she remembered every bit of it.

Well – maybe the plural of boys wasn’t really all that appropriate – she was really waiting for was a certain boy.

Ah yes – Adrien Agreste. Despite herself, she had to laugh. How silly was it to be obsessed with a boy for so long you forget your own name?

Being much older now – 22 years, to be exact – allowed her the ability to laugh at herself, but she remembered loving him so clearly she could swear that she’d fall right back in love with him if she ever saw him again.

That would never happen, though. Adrien was smart, attractive, successful. He would be out of Paris, or, if he was in Paris, he wouldn’t be caught dead in a simple square like this. He ought to be surrounded by opulence and beautiful women. That was just the way it went.

Marinette snapped a quick picture of a group of kids playing by the fountain, and blinked heavily, still tired from the night before, all those tears had really taken her out of it.

“Marinette,” she heard Tikki whisper from her purse, “do you see that over there?”

Marinette’s eyes shifted to where Tikki was looking, over by the path heading straight towards the main street. Standing there were two people, walking closer to the center of the park, hand-in-hand. She was about to smile and take a picture, but she hesitated at the last second.

“That looks…like…”

“Alya.” Tikki spoke for her. “And Nino. Do you think…?”

Marinette had already taken off towards the unlikely couple, bubbled with excitement and feverish nervousness. Would they recognize her? She looked more mature, older, and her hair was longer, but still, they had to! They had to-

“Alya!” She said, the words dripping with excitement. Said woman turned to the sound of her name being called – and then, she completely froze.

Marinette continued to move towards them rapidly, what was she standing there for? Did she not recognize her?

“Alya,” she repeated when she was close enough to see her facial expression, and the way the reddish tips of her hair glinted in the sun. “It’s me! Mari-”

“Marinette.” Alya finished for her, tucking a spare strand of hair behind her ear in a reserved manner. “You’re in Paris….”

“Yeah! I’m-” Marinette blinked quickly. Why did Alya look so…weird?

“It’s been a while.” Nino concluded. Alya nodded in agreement.

“I didn’t think you were going to come back.” Alya admitted, a hint of bitterness escaping into her words. Marinette felt all of the color drain out of her face instantly.

How could she have been so naïve? Alya didn’t want to talk to her – she probably never wanted to see her again! Marinette had left, with only a few words of goodbye, and never even called. So blinded by her own selfishness – Marinette had just walked into a room that no one wished her to be in.

“Alya.” She spoke, voice as tight as her fake smile. “I’ve missed you.”

“Have you?” Alya asked, voice and eyebrows raised in suspicion. “You sure didn’t act like it. You know, a letter would’ve been nice.”

Marinette bit her lip to keep it from quivering. She’d never felt so guilty in her entire life. Here she was – a full grown woman, feeling once again like a small child being reprimanded for stealing the last cookie.

“I'm…” she lost her own words for a second, overwhelmingly nervous. “…so sorry, Alya. I wanted to, I just…I didn’t know who I was, or hat I wanted anymore. I needed to escape.”

Alya scoffed, sinking a knife deep into Marinette’s heart. “Is that so? Well in that case, if you needed to escape so bad, why the hell did you come back?”

Marinette’s senses shut down.

“My mother.” She said sharply, eyes averted to the ground. “She’s dying.” She heard Alya’s breath intake. At this point – she was having a lot of trouble swallowing that annoyingly familiar lump in her throat. What had she done?

“God, Marinette, I’m-” Alya swallowed, lowering her hand that had begun to raise, almost as if she wanted to pull Marinette into a tearful hug. “…I’m sorry. I really am.”

Marinette said nothing. At this point, seeing all the broken ties she’d left in Paris, all she’d been feeling was regret, dead-set and heavy, ready to crush her in its wake at any given moment.

“We should go.” Nino whispered, and Marinette felt her heart shatter.

“We’ll see you around,” Alya said in a less-than-convincing voice. Marinette, hugging her arms to her sides tightly, nodded without making eye contact. She listened to the sounds of their fading footsteps before she allowed the first tear to fall.

Her camera bounced on her hip as she made her way out of the park, forgetting about work or any of her responsibilities. Her only focus was getting some place where she could break down in peace. Away from prying eyes – away from Paris – away from her problems, all she did was run, run, run-

She caught herself off guard while she wasn’t paying attention, accidentally smashing into a large man with a red cap. In fear of his wrath, she quickly stuttered an apology and moved on as fast as she could. She just had to get away, that’s all she needed…

“Marinette, slow down!” Tikki whispered frantically as she crossed a busy street unwisely. Marinette was silent, wallowing in the mistakes of her past as she moved like a glacier – steady, forward, unyielding. She lost track of time and place, it was just move, move, move – doesn’t mater how fast or how soon, just go-

“Marinette!” Tikki shrieked, oddly loud, considering she was supposed to stay hidden. “You have to stop – where are we?”

Marinette wiped a few stray tears from her eyes and looked up, squinting at the light of the already fading sun. She had no memory of this place, just blank buildings, blank street signs, blank faces.

Feeling suddenly panicked, she turned around, trying to remember which way she had come from. Left, right, straight?

Quick breath in, quick breath out. It’s fine, she’d be fine, she just needed to remember-

Her head jerked up. When did it get so quiet?

The streets were close to empty – like at the sound of her distress, they had scattered. The sun was far down enough that only small rays of light graced the sidewalks, and it was a deep, saturated yellow in color. This wasn’t the Paris she remembered.

She looked out at the people she did see – a family across the street, hurrying to their car, a man in a red cap, a couple of teenagers exiting a coffee shop, but other than that…she was alone.

She shut her eyes, absorbing the remaining sounds in the atmosphere and calmly breathing in and out, over and over again.

When she opened her eyes, there was a surprise waiting for them.

There, across the street and looming above the apartment building complex by the candle shop, was Chat Noir.

….And he was looking right at her.

.

.

.

aaahhh i tried t-t

Merry Christmas, Bucky Barnes (for Lara aka AgentPeggieCarter)

Merry Christmas, Lara! This ended up sort of pre-relationship, and it is possible for it to go either way, or both, I guess, depending on how you see it going, but hopefully this is something you’ll enjoy!

Merry Christmas, Bucky Barnes

“Thanks again, Miss Lewis. I know this probably wasn’t how you imagined spending your Christmas Eve.” The Captain’s effortless way of blending sincere gratitude and regretful apology was almost painful to Darcy. She purposefully surrounded herself with people that communicated with cold hard facts or overblown, dramatic expressions that were more sarcastic and superficial then containing any actual emotion. Cue her typical response to feeling uncomfortable around other people’s emotion: irreverent humor.

“It’s fine, Cap, really. You’re just saving me from my annual Christmas morning hangover and probably an awkward walk of shame as well. Actually, I should be thanking you.”

Steve did his best not to frown with disappointment at the young woman as he cleared his throat. He was about 80 percent sure she was kidding anyway. That seemed to be Darcy’s thing. Besides, she really was doing him a favor. It would be bad manners to be judgmental about her life choices, or about the way she joked about intimate things in a way that he found inappropriate. It wasn’t like she was the only person he knew that was like that. She was simply a product of her time, it seemed.

“Well, I just wanted you to know how grateful I, uh…” Steve stuttered off when Darcy waved one of her delicate hands in his face.

“Seriously, don’t mention it. So, you really think he’ll show up?” She accepted the glasses from the Stark Industries tech guy and placed them on her face. They were more expensive and fashionable then her own glasses, and this pair came with the added feature of being able to digitally transmit audio and video feed back to the surveillance van.

“I think so. If he’s starting to remember anything from his past… well, hopefully that will draw him here.” He held up a tablet that displayed a collage of photos, both from the time before, and from now. There where stills from video taken in DC as well as surveillance photos taken around the world in the last 18 months. “You have his face memorized, right? He could have altered his appearance since Amsterdam.”

Darcy chuckled and pushed the tablet away. “Trust me, Cap, I’ve done nothing but study his pretty mug since you asked for my help three days ago, and even if he’s wearing an epic disguise, I doubt I’ll ever be able to forget the shape of those thighs. Meow!” she growled playfully making kitten claws at Captain America, thereby sealing her in his mind as a shameless flirt, as well as a few less flattering things, probably.

Steve began to seriously doubt Miss Lewis’s ability to be serious and helpful, and was sort of regretting asking for her help in this matter, except that he didn’t really have anyone else to ask.

He needed someone unfamiliar to Bucky and un-threatening in general. Darcy was both those things. He just had to trust Thor’s recommendation that she could handle this sensitive situation.

“Just keep your head up and your eyes moving, and remember, I only want to check on him, make sure he’s taking care of himself and not injured or anything. There’s no need to draw his attention or put yourself on his radar. I don’t think he’s dangerous to civilians, but if he notices you watching he might think you’re from HYDRA or…”

Darcy cut the rambling captain off again. “Yeah, no worries, Cap, you explained all of this in the briefing. This isn’t my first rodeo, you know.”

Steve’s eyebrows drew tight over his eyes in repressed surprise and confusion.

Darcy noticed his expression and giggled nervously. “Okay, technically, this is the first time I’ve done the whole ‘official undercover reconnaissance’ thing, but this is far from the first time I’ve stalked a guy without tipping him off to my attention.”

“Uh…” Steve gaped, a bit at a loss for how to respond. “I just don’t want you to put yourself in unnecessary danger.” He finished lamely.

“Got it. Well, just in case, I’ve got my Taser. If he gets fresh, I’ll light him up like a seasonally decorated pine tree.” Her grin could only be described as cheerfully menacing.

Steve recognized that she was mostly giving him a hard time, though he was sure she did have her Taser secreted somewhere on her person, under her many layers of winter wear. Still, his head started to fill up with images of all the many ways that this could go badly. He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes against the horrific mental film reel. “Maybe this is a bad idea…”

“What!? No way, Cap. You already dragged me out here to the wilds of Brooklyn on a dark and rainy Christmas Eve. I’m doing this thing. It’ll be fine. You just need to relax. Your super spysassin friend can probably sense your up-tightness from a mile away.”

“It would probably help me relax if you could at least pretend to take this seriously,” Steve growled out in irritation. It was the first time Darcy had ever seen even a crack in his uber-polite mask of professionalism.

She sighed and let her face shift to sympathetic concern. She reached up and grabbed his shoulders forcing him to look her in the eyes.

“Steve! I’m sorry, okay. I get it. This is really important to you. He’s really important to you, and since you’re really important to the rest of us, you can trust me. I’m not going to screw this up, okay? I just get a little loopy when I’m nervous, so, sorry for that. I’m good now, see? Serious face activated.”

Darcy gave him her best Son of Coul impression.

He didn’t think her making that face was the reason why, but he found himself feeling somewhat reassured in spite of himself.

“Thanks. And I’m sorry, I am up tight. This is just…”

“It’s a big deal. Copy that, Cap.”

Darcy gave the stern-faced man one last pat on the curve of his shoulder and a reassuring smile, and then she turned to open the door in the back of the van. “Wish me luck, Cap?”

“Good luck,” he whispered solemnly, then attempted to return her reassuring smile.

She gave a little half wave, climbed out onto the shiny, wet pavement, and shut the door behind her.

Darcy had never been a spy. She wasn’t a terribly good liar, either. She had, however, played all the supporting actress roles (think leading lady’s best friend and/or the comic relief) in every high school play since her sophomore year, and placed 1st in dramatic monologue and 2nd with her duet partner Manny Vargas at state her senior year with the speech team.

She took a calming, centering breath and put on her character.

For this evening’s performance, Darcy Lewis would be playing the role of ‘semi-bored, going through the holiday motions to stave off seasonal depressive disorder, single for Christmas three years running and pretending not to hate it, white girl from Brooklyn’.

She’d had a drama teacher once tell her to draw on things she knew personally to help bring out the truth of each character. So, that’s what she was doing. Her acting skills were really only necessary for the 'from Brooklyn’ part. She’d never actually been here, before tonight, though Steve had gone over maps of the area for hours with her the day before.

She suspected she could find the church from her current location with a blindfold on and both hands tied behind her back. Although, that would be dangerous, so she wasn’t going to attempt it, what with holiday traffic and whatnot. Still, she knew she wouldn’t have any trouble finding her way around.

She walked purposefully down the street, but slowly enough that she didn’t look rushed or draw undue attention to herself. Steve and the surveillance crew had dropped her off almost a mile away from the church where she was hopefully going to make visual contact with the winter wonder-man, but she’d worn her good walking boots, so the distance wasn’t really an issue. What was an issue was the nearly freezing rain that was drizzling from the sky.

She pulled her umbrella from her purse, pulled her hat down around her ears, her scarf up around her chin and kept going.

20 minutes later she rounded a corner and could see the spires of the old church over the rooftops of a narrow row of townhouses and the skeletal remains of the streets many deciduous trees. She personally thought the trees would have looked much more festive with a string of lights decking each bare branch, but she supposed that was impractical. People in her home town tended to go overboard and put holiday decorations on everything but the stop signs and traffic lights, so maybe she was biased.

As Darcy got closer, she began running her eyes back and forth over every shadow and likely hiding place, trying to be as subtle as possible. There were a few people out on the street tonight, but not as many as she’d feared. Apparently, the weather was keeping people inside. All the better for her, she figured, though she kind of wished she was inside, curled up with a peppermint hot cocoa and a classic Christmas movie- like Die Hard or Reindeer Games. 

She looked both ways before stepping off the curb and crossing the street towards the church. It was on the corner with a stone and wrought iron fence around the outside. Across a large stretch of fence was a plastic banner announcing their holiday service hours.

There had been a family thing at 4, which she figured would be over by now, and a music festival/choir thing at 10 which wasn’t for a couple hours. She reached the gate and turned in, following a long sidewalk down the side of the large red-grey sandstone building.

Near to where the church doors were, a smallish courtyard opened up, with several benches ringing the area which was probably very lovely during the warmer, greener times of year. She was just considering the best place to sit and wait when she spotted him.

He was parked on one of the benches, farthest from the door, his head bowed slightly over his hands, which were folded in front of him. The rain was pouring down over his hair and dripping off the soaked strands onto his shoulders and chest and thighs. He was positively drenched.

She didn’t think she’d ever seen a sadder sight on Christmas Eve.

She turned and walked back to the fence, her heart pounding and her adrenal glands working overtime. She’d seen him. That was what Steve wanted, right? For her to see him so he’d know that he was okay? Except he didn’t really seem okay to her. Physically, maybe, she hadn’t really taken the time to look that closely, but her first impression from her quick little glimpse had defiantly been “Depressed and Homeless Vet.” Which she supposed was probably super accurate.

The layout of the churchyard made it impossible for her to observe him without being super obvious about it. Captain Rogers would probably just want her to leave. She should leave.

Except… she didn’t think she could leave him just sitting there in the rain and looking like he’d just found out everyone he’d ever known or loved was killed. Though come to think of it, that was actually pretty close to the truth, too.

Damn it.

She couldn’t just leave him.

She started whispering, knowing that Steve would be able to hear every word, though he wouldn’t be able to respond. She wasn’t wearing an earpiece because they weren’t sure about Barnes’ super hearing abilities.

“Okay, Captain, don’t freak out, okay? Just sit tight and stay where you are and I’ll be fine. Don’t worry. Unless he actually attacks me or gets all violent. Then do worry and come save me. Or if I use my safe word. Which is Snoopy, FYI.” She’d reached the fence and turned back around once more.

“Okay, Lewis,” she muttered to herself, “You can do this.” Hell, he’d probably seen her and taken off already anyway, right? He was still there, though, head still bowed and dripping rainwater like a lost little puppy left out in the storm.

She walked fairly slowly, making her destination obvious and none of her moves were sudden. When she reached his bench, she sat down and angled her umbrella so that it covered as much of him as she could without leaning over him.

He hadn’t moved from his spot, but it was pretty much a given that he knew she was there.

“That is a seriously epic brood you have going on there, dude, which I can appreciate, but I’m worried you might scare away any nice, church-going folk that wander by,” she said after a moment of tense silence, keeping her voice bright and light. She’d never really done well with silence.

She heard a soft snort and saw his eyes turn towards her, peeking through his hair. “Figured Rogers would send a stranger and a civilian. Didn’t count on you being a pretty dame, though.”

“Yeah, well, he figured I had a better chance of getting closer to you, since I’m all ‘not a threat’ and all,” she shrugged, trying not to look too closely at the pretty part. “You should tell him all about how you aren’t going to do anything to hurt me, though, so he doesn’t decide to make with the bull/china shop routine.”

He looks over at her, narrowing his eyes at her face before leaning around to look her right in the face. Or the video surveillance glasses, whatever. “Its fine, punk. As long as you stay clear, I’m content to just sit for a bit.”

“Cool,” she said with a smile and relaxed some of the bunched up muscles in her shoulders and back.

He nodded, leaning back, and they sat in silence for another minute or so. She was trying to think of something else to say when he asked, “You his girl?”

That shocked her enough to have her barking out a sudden laugh. “Uh, no. All the no. I barely know him. I’m a friend of a friend kind of acquaintance. Actually, between you and me,” she said, voice lowered and leaning a bit closer, “I don’t think Captain Rogers likes me very much.”

He snorted again. “He always look kind of constipated and/or confused when you’re around and constantly say the wrong thing?”

She shrugs again. “Close enough, though I think I’m the one who’s always saying the wrong thing around him. I’m too much about the verbal shock and awe. I think I make him uneasy.”

“I wouldn’t take it too personally. Stevie never was much when it came to talking to women, especially not a gorgeous gal, like you.” He said it so casually, like it was just the facts.

Just the facts, ma’am.

“Uh, thanks?” she said and uncrossed and re-crossed her ankles underneath her. “I reserve the right to call bullshit, though, pending further social interaction.”

“Fair enough,” he muttered and went back to looking at his hands.

Another moment of silence passed, though the tension seemed to have eased somewhat, sliding from fraught into merely awkward.

“So, I have to think, what with you just sitting here, exactly where the good Captain expected you to be, that a part of you wanted to get caught. You thinking about granting the guy’s Christmas wish and coming in from the cold? Literally and figuratively?”

“Nah,” he said, sitting back and slouching a bit on the bench. “I figure if I let him catch sight of me, still free and mostly whole, every once in a while he doesn’t chase me quite so hard. Call it a compromise of sorts.”

“He gets to know you’re sort of safe and you get some breathing room. I get it,” she said, shifting the umbrella to cover them both better.  “Makes sense to me. That way you don’t have to be the one to deal with the guys disappointed puppy eyes. You’re welcome, by the way.”

“You make him sound like such a chore,” he said with a little bit of a smirk on one corner of his mouth.  “Why’d you agree to help then, if it’s such a bother?”

“It’s not that much of a bother. Besides, telling Captain America no is not a super power I possess. I was sort of his last resort, anyway. Everyone else he knows is either highly recognizable or highly dangerous, or both. Also, I didn’t have any plans and this sounded fun,” Darcy declared dryly, hoping she sounded more optimistic than sarcastic.

When he raised an eyebrow and nodded at the stream of rainwater pouring down the edge of the umbrella and onto her shoulder she figured she’d failed to convince. She gave another shrug. “I’ve had worse Christmas Eve’s.”

He just shook his head and looked disgusted with the world. “Stevie should have offered to take you out, dancin’ or something fun, instead of sending you in to check up on me.”

 Darcy laughed a little at the image of her and Steven Rogers at a club, grinding on the dance floor. “That would definitely have ended in tears, maybe even bloodshed. Though, I would pay money to see the Captain’s face when he’s introduced to what passes for dancing now-a-days.” She held onto the mental image and smiled into the rain. “Trust me, I think this is the much better option.”

“Hey, I ain’t complaining,” he said with a bit of a flirty smirk and she could see, under all the hair and baggage the handsome, charismatic man he’d been before.  “I feel like I certainly got the better end of the deal.” 

Inside the church the organ began playing ‘O Holy Night,’ the sounds muffled, but still distinct enough to make out, and Darcy found herself relaxing even more and maybe even enjoying herself a bit, though her face was cold and her nose was probably doing its best Rudolf impression.

They sat in an almost companionable silence for a few more minutes before she noticed the temperature had dropped enough for her to see her breath and the rain was looking more like sleet then rain. She snuggled deeper into her coat and realized that, with his soaked through clothes and all that it was a miracle he wasn’t shivering visibly.

She made a spur of the moment call and unwound her scarf from her neck and pulled off her hat. They were grey and navy stripped and black, respectively and she figured they were manly enough to suit him. Not that beggars could be choosers or anything.

“Here,” she said and held them out to him.

“No way, doll,” he balked and leaned away. “You put those back on. Don’t want you to catch your death.”

“Nuh- uh,” she argued, shaking her head. “I’m pretty sure you need these more than me. I get to go home after this and take a nice hot bath and curl up and in my bed with a hot chocolate and central heating. Do you have anything like that?”

He hesitated, looking like he was very seriously considering putting up a fight about it, but she put on her stubborn face, the one she used when Jane was shooting for a full 24 hours in the lab, and was pleased to see him caving.

She shook the knitted items at him again and he finally took them from her. “Thanks, doll,” he added grudgingly and she smiled in satisfaction.

“You are welcome,” she replied cheerfully as she watched him pull the hat on over his still soggy hair and wrap the scarf around his neck. “I have lots more at home, so don’t think you’re putting me out or anything. My nana is a knitting freak. She’s always sending more stuff then I could possibly even wear.”

He nodded again and tucked his hands in his pockets and hunched in on himself a bit. She was afraid she’d crossed some unspoken line by offering him charity, and now he was closing himself off.

Or maybe he was just cold.

The organ music coming from the church had changed to ‘O Little Town of Bethlehem,’ and she had to fight not to hum along, not that she thought he would mind. It was just sort of an embarrassing thing to do in front of a near stranger.

Given world enough and time, though, she imagined they could be friends.

“So, are you good, though? I mean, since I’ve risked the Captain’s wrath and approached you even though he told me specifically not to; I figure I shouldn’t waste this opportunity.”

He gave her an old, mildly confused look and she rambled on. “What I mean is: is there anything you need that I can get for you on short notice? Or is there any message you’d like passed on to your buddy. He’s sort of a captive audience at this point, so you might as well.”

While he considered that, Darcy noticed a group of people coming up the sidewalk, choir members, she guessed, if the churchy looking robes poking out from under their coats were any indication. A couple of them glanced briefly to where the two of them sat, but mostly they just walked up the stairs and into the church. The music got louder while the door was opened and it made her Christmas spirit, which was usually half a sleep, perk up and start to purr.

“I guess if I could tell him anything it would be… I just want him to know that he doesn’t need to keep coming after me. I can take care of myself, and it would be nice, for a change if I didn’t have to dodge him and whatever’s left of Hydra. I just want some space, like you said. I just need some peace and quiet to get my head on right and then… I don’t know. Then we’ll see, I guess.”

His voice was steady, though his speech faltered a bit in a couple places. When he was silent again for two whole minutes she figured that meant that was it.

“Think there’s any chance he’ll listen?” he asked, turning to eye her and letting his mouth hitch up at the corner again.

“Honestly?” she asked, eyebrows shooting up and voice jumping and octave, “No, probably not. I mean, he might give you a few weeks head start, but- well, I think you’re too important to him for him to really ever let you go. I get the impression he can be kind of a stubborn ass, like that.”

He snorted again. “You sure you ain’t his girl? Sounds like you know him pretty well to me.”

“Nah, I’m single and ready to mingle, no man can tie me down.” She declared and then internally winced and marveled at her ability to sound both pathetic and perverted at the same time.

Luckily, he didn’t seem to notice, just chuckled lightly and shook his head like he couldn’t believe such a thing was possible- which made her feel very flattered, and quite possibly delusional.

A few more choir people showed up. The music that flooded the courtyard when the door opened this time was ‘O Come All Ye Faithful.’

They’d pretty much exhausted their talking points, but they both seemed reluctant to end the conversation and walk away. After the silence started to drag on and on and more and more people started showing up, he asked her, “You planning on going in?” and nodded towards the church.

“Who me?” she asked, a little startled. “No. My mother was Jewish and my father was Wiccan. I’m pretty sure that qualifies me for instant combustion should I cross the threshold.” It was a joke she’d used in the past to thwart religious pestering, with mixed results. He actually laughed, though, which made her smile back. It was quiet and a bit rusty, but it seemed genuine enough. She was marking it a win.

“What about you?” she queried gently. This place obviously meant enough to him for him to park himself in the freezing rain on Christmas Eve.

He shook his head, though. “I’m pretty sure the same can be said for the world’s most prolific assassin.”

She braved nudging his shoulder gently at his self-deprecation. “I don’t know. Isn’t Christmas all about love and forgiveness for Christians?”

He lifted one shoulder, but didn’t say anything more, and she didn’t push.

“Well, I should probably go soon,” Darcy admitted reluctantly after another lengthy silence. “Captain Rogers is probably getting ready to burst that vein in his forehead, and I’d hate to have his pretty face all purple and bruised for Christmas.” She tried to keep things nice and light with the joke, but in her chest her heart was sinking.

He only nodded and leaned over to rest his elbows on his knees once again. She stood slowly, wavering in her resolve as the rain started pelting him again. She stepped close enough to get her umbrella back over him and he looked up at her.

“Do you have someplace to be tomorrow?” she asked and felt her finger’s tighten on the umbrella’s handle.

“About a 1000 miles from here, at least,” he answered, a bit sadly.

“Is that ‘cause you want to run? Or ‘cause you think you have to?” Darcy inquired; her eyes narrowed, but carried on before he could answer. “Because if it’s really the first one, then that’s one thing, but if it’s the second then- well, maybe you shouldn’t.”

He raised an eyebrow at that and studied her face cautiously. “You got a better idea?” he asked after a second.

“Sure. I mean, I could hang an extra stocking on my fake mantel and fix up an extra mug of cocoa. No patriotic boy scouts allowed. What do you say?” She smiled slyly and held her breath.

She was super nervous all the sudden. She didn’t think she should be this nervous.

When he actually took a moment and looked like he might even be considering it, she felt her pulse jump in her throat. He did eventually shake his head no, and she felt the keen edge of disappointment, though she thought she hid it pretty well.

“Maybe next year, doll,” he said, looking back up at her with a hint of that flirty smirk on his face and she thought it was her own small Christmas miracle that she resisted a swoon.

“I’m gonna hold ya to it, Barnes,” she said and gave him back as good as she got.

“Okay, it’s a date,” he said and winked, actual facts winked at her.

Be still her heart.

“And hey, don’t let the Cap give you a hard time, okay? You’re just a sweet kid doing what you thought was right and being kind to an old hard case. He should take it easy on you, if he knows what’s good for him,” he finished with a mild scowl.

She laughed, pulled off the glasses, and held them in front of her so she could look right into the camera. “You hear that, Cap? I’m not to be trifled with!”  She put them back on after sending what she hoped was a confident smirk to the men in the van and looked back down at her new assassin protector. “Thanks for that. I know he’s all bark, but still. Puppy eyes, Barnes, puppy eyes.”

“I’m familiar,” he said quietly, and a bit sardonically. “Good luck?”

She nodded, “Thanks.”

Darcy new she should turn and leave now, just walk away. Any second now…

“Can I give you a hug goodbye?” she blurted. “I feel like you need a hug, and I think you should let me hug you.”

He looked genuinely shocked for a second, then considered for a painfully long moment before standing and holding out his arms. “I’d have to be a hell of a schmuck to turn down an offer like that from a dish like you.”

She wrapped her arms around his waist then, careful not to smack him with the umbrella and squeezed him tightly. It was cold and his clothes were soaked through and getting her mostly dry coat wetter by the second, but when he lifted his arms and laid them across her shoulders she pressed her face into his slightly moldy smelling jacket and secretly decided it was the best hug she’d ever shared. That was saying something, too, because everyone knew that Thor gave great hug.

“Merry Christmas, Bucky Barnes,” she whispered.

“Merry Christmas, doll,” he sighed back.

Darcy released him reluctantly and stepped back. Then, with a final smile, she turned and walked away. She didn’t look back. She figured he’d just be gone anyway, and she didn’t know how that would make her feel. Better just to leave it like that.

She only got a few blocks before the surveillance van pulled up and parked just ahead of her on the street and she braced herself for Cap’s disappointed face.   Mostly empty threats from his ex-hydra assassin, back–from-the-dead bestie aside, she figured she was really in for it.

When the tall, blonde man climbed from the van and approached her, though, all he did was smile at her in wonder. Then, before she could open her mouth and ruin the moment, he reached down and pulled her against his chest in a grateful hug.

“Thanks for taking care of my friend,” Steve whispered into her hair, and that was it.

When he released her and leaned back, holding her at arm’s length and smiling at her she couldn’t help but blurt out the first thing that popped into her head.

“Hallelujah, it’s a Christmas Miracle!”