I know, I know… too many Dad!Shawn imagines out there but I couldn’t help myself. This takes place somewhat in the future and the twins are in first grade! Hope you enjoy xx
“Okay, so school starts at 8:15.,” Jo says, applying her night cream, hair up in a messy bun, while Shawn is brushing his teeth at the sink next to her. “I have to leave at six tomorrow to catch my flight. You get the twins ready, make breakfast, put their lunch boxes into their little backpacks and drive them to school,” she glances at him and he nods, toothbrush dangling from the corner of his mouth.
“I gosh dish.”
Jo laughs, not having understood a single word. "What?”
Shawn takes his toothbrush out, washing his mouth. “I got this,” he repeats confidently, putting the toothbrush away.
Requested by @jessicaa1994: Oh my god, I’m in love with your writing! 😍😍 can you please write an Auston Matthews pregnancy imagine, something like you finding out, telling him and his reaction! Thank you soon much
A/N: Okay, I don’t know how I feel about this, so let me know what you thing.
“Again? Baby, you should go to the doctor.” Auston says, holding my hair back with one hand and rubbing circles on my back while I empty the contents of my stomach in the toilet. It’s the third day in a row that I have gone straight to the toilet to throw up after drinking a couple sips of my coffee. “Maybe you are lactose intolerant or you are allergic to coffee.” He suggests and I shake my head, getting on my feet and walking to the sink to brush my teeth and splash my face with some cold water.
A/N: Ahh! Here is chapter one of the prequel for Always Mine! If you have not already read Always Mine, no worries! You DO NOT have to read that to understand this! I really hope you guys like it! Don’t be afraid to let me know what you think!
P.S: I am imagining Negan looks like his Ike Evans from Magic City :)
Summary: Before the apocalypse, Katherine was a normal twenty two year old girl. That was until she met the man who would soon change her life forever.
A loud, sharp, ringing jolted her out of her deep sleep. She let out
a soft groan as she pulled her blanket over her head.
“Shut up!” She groaned, covering her ears with her hands trying
to block out the noise. When the ringing stopped, she slowly pulled
her hands away from her ears and poked her head out from under the
blanket. She quickly ducked back under however when the bright rays
from the morning sun hit her eyes. She reached a hand up to rub at
her aching temples.
Alexander Hamilton is an Omega, but no one else knows this. No one else can know this. Even in this day and age, Omegas are still treated as little more than slaves. No rights, no protections, nothing. Alex has to hide his rank from the world for this reason. John Laurens is an Alpha, but like Alexander, he is hiding his rank, ashamed of the Alpha he was born as. Lies stack upon lies upon more lies. How long before they all come crashing down?
Alex wasn’t sure what happened as he started to come too. His head was pounding and he felt a little sick. Shit..Groaning, the Omega tried to pry his eyes open.
“Ugh..” he groaned as he managed to get them open.
“The hell happened..?” He muttered, rubbing his eyes. He felt so..drained.
“You passed out and gave me a heart attack, thats what” Alex’s head whipped around to see Laf sitting on the edge of the bed.
“Laf..? I passed out? What- Oh…Oh shit” It was like everything came back at once and he felt anxiety bubbling up in his chest again.
“Alex..Alexander look at me. There we go. Deep breaths. I don’t want you passing out again or I’ll be the one having a panic attack here.” Laf tried to joke and honestly it made Alex chuckled through the breathing exercises Laf was making him do. In for 7 seconds, hold for 5, then let it out slowly.
“Thats better. Now do you want to tell me what happened? You don’t have to, but you can if you want to” Laf said and Alex paused.
“Its fine..I just. He’s an Alpha, Laf. I was just expecting to have a yelling match until we got things settled…but then he used it on me Laf. I don’t know if he meant to, but one second I was screaming at him and then I couldn’t speak and..it..it scared me” Alex didn’t like to admit when he was scared. It made him feel weak..
“I don’t know..but I heard him when you came inside. I don’t think he meant to..Are you feeling alright? Hungry? Thirsty?” Laf asked and Alex shook his head, running his hand through his hair.
“No, I’m okay. Ugh..my hair feels gross. I need to wash it” he murmured and Laf chuckled.
“Where’s your brush. I’ll make it look at least a little presentable.” Laf sighed with a chuckle, smiling. Alex seemed to perk up, telling Laf where it was in the bathroom. He could hear talking in the other rooms and he waited for Laf to return before asking about it.
“Is someone else here? I mean other than Thomas and Herc” He asked and Laf nodded with a hum, sitting back on the bed.
“Mm. Yes a friend of his. James, I believe his name was. Oh, and get this. He’s Herc’s shorter twin. They look very similar they were both talking about it still while moving Tommy’s stuff in-”
“Don’t call him that please Ive only known him in total hours a day, but I can not look at him and see anyone that can be called ‘Tommy’” Alex said, making Laf laugh out.
“I don’t see how you two don’t like eachother. You’re both very similar in personality..well somewhat.” Laf mused as he moved to sit behind Alex, running the brush through his hair slowly, not wanting to hurt his friend.
“He’s too much like me. Thats the problem. I’m a sarcastic asshole, but that doesnt mean I wanna live with another sarcastic asshole like myself. He flirted with me the first time we met. Real pitiful flirting, might I add. Hes just real annoying to me, I don’t know” Alex muttered and Laf hummed.
“Give him a little slack. He has bad anxiety and isn’t good with socializing.” Laf explained, brushing out tangles from a very relaxed Alexander’s hair.
“No way. I’ve never seen someone with social anxiety act like a suave fucker as he seems to act” Alex rebuked and huffed as Laf shushed him.
“He’s a good actor. Shame he never went into theater like he wanted…its not like he hides it, if you ask him, he’d tell you. How do I put it…he doesn’t do well with thinking before he speaks..like some people I know..and ends up sounding like..oh how did you phrase it. Ah. Like a sarcastic asshole” Laf mused.
“He used to be the opposite how he is now when we lived in France. A lot more..hm..meek, I believe is the way to put it. Being an Alpha, you can imagine how some people treated him.” Laf said, but didn’t further elaborate.
“Okay okay, fine. Hes an asshole, but isn’t trying to be an asshole. Got it. Doesn’t mean I like him” Alex muttered, but relaxed again as his hair was pulled back and pulled into a ponytail.
“That is completely understandable. I’m sure he feels the same about you” Laf chuckled and Alex turned to face him.
“Alright, now spill. Did you two have a thing? Don’t give me that look ive only seen you talk about one person with that kind of adoration in your voice and it’s Herc.” Alex said, trying to change the subject. Laf’s cheeks dusted with red and he huffed.
“We dated once. Once. There was no thing, he moved back to America and I moved on” Laf insisted, but Alex could see there was more. He hummed and stood, stretching.
“I’m going out. Need some air” He said and moved to his closet.
“Are you sure about that, Alex? I don’t want you to hurt yourself..and please for the love of god wear a jacket you’re going to kill yourself at this rate.”
“That’s the plan” Alex said monotonously, but smiled reassuringly back at Laf.
“Kidding. I’m fine, dont worry. Just wanna take a walk. Lets me think” Alex said, sliding his tanktop off and a sweater on. It was a gift from Laf that he got his last birthday. It was simple, but effective for his mood almost all the time. It just said ‘Try talking to me when I care. Estimated wait time: Never’.
“Any particular place you’re going” the Frenchman asked nonchalantly and Alex rolled his eyes playfully.
“Just walking aimlessly, mom” he said with a playful tone, though Laf wouldn’t take him seriously even if he tried to act serious.
“Okay okay fine” Laf silently admitted defeat and smiled some.
“Call me if you need anything” Laf said as Alex waved and left the room. Laf was probably going to snoop about his room, but they used to do that all the time so Alex wasn’t concerned.
“S’right here alright?” He heard Herc’s voice, so he popped his head into Thomas’s room.
“Holy shit Lafayette wasn’t lying” Alex mused and snickered as the man,James from what Laf told him, yelped and almost dropped the side of the desk himself and Herc were moving.
“Oh hey you’re up. Feeling any better? You really scared us man” Herc said he sat the desk down, patting James’s shoulder when the shorter man started coughing. Huh. Must be sick.
“Yeah feeling better. Just pissed that I haven’t found my doppelganger yet. Gonna go for a walk, actually. Hang around if you and Laf want I don’t think I’ll be gone long. I’ll be careful, yes I’m fine, and yes ill call if I need anything” he said and left without letting Herc protest, chuckling softly. Once he was away from prying eyes, he deflated, wrapping his scarf tighter around his neck as he went out. He knew exactly where he is going and the walk didn’t bother him at all. He really did need time to think.
20 minutes and three flights of stairs later and Alex was standing in front of a familiar door. Knocking, he waited and smiled some at the date that appeared in the doorway.
“Hey Maria. Hey Peggy” he greeted, waving to the other, younger, Schuyler sister in the background.
“Is Eliza home? I need to talk to her” Alex said with a sheepish smile, stepping inside when Maria invited him in.
“Mmhm. She’s in the kitchen I’ll go get her” Maria replied, but stopped when said woman left the kitchen and stopped when she saw them.
“Ah. Hello Alex. Another impromptu therapy session?” She asked, walking over and giving Maria a quick kiss on the cheek. Eliza tried to sound cheery as usual, but Alex could hear the underlying tone of worry. He only ever stopped by unannounced when he needed to talk.
“Cute and I’m not surprised it happened.. but yeah it’s one of those days” he said and she nodded.
“Hey hun, think you could help Peggy with her homework for a bit?” Eliza asked and Maria looked between the two of them. She seemed to realize this was a private conversation that was about to occur, so she nodded.
“Alright. She won’t get it done if someone isn’t watching anyways” she laughed softly and went off. Eliza took Alex by the hand and led him down a hallway and too a room Alex hadn’t been in before.
“It’s the nursery for the baby. It’s also the furthest room from Mari and Peggy” She said and let Alex take a seat in a rocking chair while she sat in a regular one by it.
“You know, you should probably look into an actual therapist instead of a student without her degree yet” she teased softly and they both knew Alex would never openly talk to a ‘real’ one.
“You’ll have your degree by the end of this. I have a long story for you” he said, settling in and letting everything pour out.
The night before her 34th birthday, OFC Ash wishes her life was different. Suddenly she and the Winchester brothers are sent back in time as she figures out what, and who, she wants.
Warnings: Angst, Feels, Implied Smut, Promiscuity, Binge drinking, saying fuck a lot, Fluff, mentions of drug use, time travel. WC: 5704 On AO3
A/N: Why am I writing about myself? I’ve been going through a lot of shit lately, plus I was bummed about my birthday. So I decided to channel my stressors into this fanfic. I’m sharing this with a sensitive heart, so be nice. It’s my birthday anyways LOL This is for @jalove-wecallhimdean‘s Ghostbusters Challenge and this is my first attempt at crack fic for @trexrambling & @wheresthekillswitch Crack Challenge. Prompts are in bold.
I sighed as my elbows spread out across the shiny wood table in the middle of the library. Half a bottle of whiskey down, and I was getting sadder with each drink. I looked up as a whistle sounded from the bunker’s kitchen. Dean came around the corner, a beer in each hand. He stopped short when he saw me with the tall green bottle front of me.
With a tilt of his head, Dean walked up the short stairs to me.
“You okay?” He asked as he handed me a beer, and then moved the whiskey bottle to the other end of the table.
Summary: Because let’s face it, your girlfriends won’t tell you when the boy of your dreams isn’t interested. So what’s left? Calling the late night radio show host known as Min Suga is a good option right? He’ll tell you how it is and ruin you while fixing your love life. Counterproductive? Definitely.
Y/n loves sweaters, she loves when they’re
oversized, sleeves draping over her fingertips, the loose knit ones, hoodies,
fleecy ones, the ones that keep her warm and happy. Yet despite her endless
adoration for comfort, here she sits, perched on her bed and staring down the
pile of black as if it’s the vilest thing in the world. In her mind it might as
well be, considering it belongs to none other than Min Yoongi. It smells
faintly of his spicy cologne and something so sincerely him, it makes her
frown. It’s dangerously comforting.
Ships: Clizzy, implied Malec, (also contains a tiny eater egg for this Jimon fic. Tell me if you find it!!)
Word Count: 2100
Plot: Clary and Izzy meet at at game night and slowly but surely start to fall in love, through several late nights and mugs of hot chocolate.
Author’s Note: Sorry for the alternative title, it was just too tempting. Please let me know what you think!!
Magnus and Alec were known for hosting
their legendary game nights every Saturday night at 12 am. Izzy had been to a
few in the beginning but had eventually stopped attending, choosing to spend
her weekends partying and dancing instead of playing Charades or whatever.
This Saturday, however, everyone seemed
busy. Her favourite party pal, Aline, had bailed on her to go out with her
girlfriend instead. Jace was busy with yet another one of his jobs. Izzy had no
idea what he wanted to work so hard for. The Lightwoods were a well-off family,
to say the least.
So, she found herself wearing the rattiest
old baggy top in her closet and a pair of jeans while sitting on the floor and
sipping hot chocolate, waiting for people to show up.
Magnus set out some food and drinks while
Alec set up the game. They were playing Pictionary, which was one of Izzy’s
least favourite games as a child. She hadn’t been a particularly good artist
back then and, truth be told, wasn’t now either. But what the hell, it was fun.
The first to arrive were Catarina and
Ragnor, Magnus’ friends from work followed by Maia and Raphael, who Izzy had
met briefly before at parties. The only person she cared about was the one who
She had bright red hair and vibrant green
eyes and she was so ridiculously short. The first thought Izzy could process
was that she was so bright. She looked like a ray of sunshine on a dreary
A few short moments later, Magnus led the
girl over to Izzy, who tried hard to not swoon.
“Isabelle, this is Clary Fray.” Magnus
introduced her. “Clary, this is Izzy, Alec’s sister.”
“Clary.” Isabelle grinned. “Nice to meet
“You too.” Clary said, smiling back as she
plopped onto the floor next to her after Magnus excused himself.
“So, um, what do you do?” Clary asked,
fiddling with the ripped part of her jeans. Izzy offered her her cup of hot
chocolate and Clary smiled before taking a sip and passing it back.
“I’m studying to be a forensic scientist.”
Izzy responded. “What about you?”
“Uh, I’m an artist.” Clary said, tucking
her hair behind her ear. “I’m also an arts and psychology major and I work at
this gallery on weekends and I’m gonna start working at this café ‘called
“Woah.” Izzy said, pausing to sip her drink.
“You’ve got a lot going on for you. How do you manage all that?”
“Well, you know.” Clary shrugged. “I just
think about how much I don’t wanna move back in with my mom and live in her
basement and that motivates me.”
Izzy let out a loud laugh. “Oh my god, I
can so relate!”
Clary smiled back, grabbing the drink from
Izzy and taking a sip. “What about you? Why do you want to be a forensic
“Well, I’ve wanted to be able to help out
and catch the bad guys since I was a kid.” Izzy explained. “But it wasn’t until
I was around twelve or thirteen that I wanted to be a forensic scientist. I
used to watch so many crime dramas and I always thought the forensic scientists
had the best job. And it just sort of developed from there, I guess.”
“Wow.” Clary breathed. “That’s so cool.”
“I guess it kinda is.” Izzy shrugged. “So
how do you know Magnus and Alec?”
“Oh, Magnus is a family friend.” Clary
said. “My mom introduced us a while back and then he helped me with my
portfolio for art school and stuff. We’ve been closer in the past few years
even though he’s like, ancient.”
heard that.” Magnus snapped over at them while Alec laughed in the
background. “I’m not ancient, Clarissa.”
“Magnus, you’re like, thirty.” Alec joined
in, causing his boyfriend to glare at him.
“Not for another eight months I’m not!”
“It’s okay, Magnus, you’ll be thirty,
flirty and thriving.” Izzy added, winking at him, causing Clary to burst into
fits of laughter.
“I never liked that movie that much.”
Magnus said, scowling.
“Wow, I’m, like, offended.” Clary said,
dramatically placing a hand over her heart. “I don’t even know who you are
“Shut up, biscuit.” Magnus said, elbowing
her before starting to tickle her. Clary squealed as she avoided his hands,
backing into Izzy, who couldn’t help but smile as she pulled her into her side.
Clary turned around to grin at her and
suddenly, she was all Izzy could see. She could see all the little details of
her, like the frayed sleeve of her sweater and an untucked strand of hair and
the freckles on her cheeks and the slightly chipped nail polish on her pinkie
finger and the tiny dots of paint covering her pants.
It was as if the rest of the world was in
240p and Clary alone was in 1080p.
Looking back, it was probably then that
Izzy fell in love with her.
Clary was working the late shift. Luke
always paid extra when you worked till 1 am on Fridays.
“Clary!” The redhead looked up at the sound
of her name and grinned when she saw who it was.
“Hey, Iz.” She leaned over the counter to
give her a hug. “What’s up?”
“Just here to see my favourite girl.” Izzy
said. “When do you get off?”
Clary glanced down at her wrist before
responding. “In about 30 minutes.”
Izzy hummed in response. “Let’s split a hot
“I’m working, Izzy.” Clary sighed.
“Please.” Izzy scoffed. “We’re the only
“Uh, I’m here.” Simon chimed in.
Clary jumped. She’d forgotten he was there.
Izzy was looking at him with wide eyes.
“Simon!” She exclaimed. “When did you get here?”
Simon scowled. “I was here before you even got here.”
“Really?” Izzy said. “I didn’t see you
Simon muttered something that suspiciously
sounded like ‘so fucking gay’.
“I’m gonna start closing up.” He said and
Clary watched him go before she started
making the hot chocolate.
“Here you go.” She said, placing the large
steaming cup on the counter before plopping two marshmallows in there.
“Yay!” Izzy said. She hopped up on the
counter and spun so she was sitting facing Clary. “Come here.” She said,
holding out her arms.
“Ookay…” Clary said, laughing softly as she
stepped forward in between her legs.
“Hey, there.” She said, noticing how her
face was awfully close to Izzy’s.
“Hello, gingersnaps.” Izzy said, grinning.
“Gingersnaps?” Clary rolled her eyes.
“Yup!” Izzy replied. She picked up the cup
and blew on it before taking a long sip.
When she put the cup back down, there was a
layer of chocolate completely covering her mouth. Clary couldn’t help but
“You’ve got a little something there.”
Clary said, brushing her thumb below Izzy’s lips.
Izzy smiled. “Is this the part where you
Clary paused to think for a second. “Not yet.”
She said, pulling away. “Let me take you on a date first.”
“Okay…” Izzy said, wrapping her arms around
Clary’s waist and pulling her back. “But one kiss won’t hurt.”
Clary grinned. “Okay.”
“Okay.” Izzy echoed. She reached up to
cradle Clary’s face in her hands, her soft hands caressing her skin.
Clary let out a soft laugh, not being able
to believe this was actually happening. Isabelle Lightwood wanted to kiss her. Isabelle freaking Lightwood. She wanted
to pinch herself just to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.
She leaned in slowly, resting her forehead
against Izzy’s before she softly pressed her lips to Izzy’s, her hands resting
on the other girl’s waist.
When she draws this moment later, they
would be sparkling and crackling, two bright fireworks completely in sync with
each other, mingling and getting closer, closer.
They didn’t pull away until several minutes
later, when Simon came back in and said, “For fucks sake, get a room, guys.”
Izzy looked at the art studio and her
cheeks hurt from smiling. It was all she’d done for the past two weeks. Smile,
She and Clary had been in constant contact,
texting all the time. Izzy would literally run all the way to Garroway’s or the
Gallery or Clary’s cramped apartment as soon as she was done with school.
They’d talk, usually, about anything and everything. And sometimes they
wouldn’t. Izzy would do some studying, Clary would work on her art and they
would sit so close together, their knees pressed together feeling like fire.
And they would always, always split a mug of hot chocolate. It was tradition
now. Izzy couldn’t imagine an evening without Clary and hot chocolate anymore.
She had no idea what Clary had planned for
their first date. She’d told her to dress casual, in usual home clothes. And
she’d told her it was at her friend’s art studio at 1 am. Izzy assumed it had
taken a while for her to set it up, as Simon was covering her shift for the
So Izzy showed up wearing an old pair of
jeans and a cute hoodie. She found the door open so she let herself in, looking
around at the place. The walls were splatters of paint and graffiti and there
was more art hanging on them. She tilted her head, trying to find Clary’s style
among the rest.
She was proud of the fact that she could
identify so many. Most of them were dated fairly recently. A completely dark
night sky with bright swirls of colour. Red and sexy high heeled boots stepping
on a field of pale, black and white flowers. Two girls with red and black hair
facing away, their hair tangling together in the wind. Two pairs of lips
wrapped around the same cup of chocolatey liquid.
The paintings made Izzy breathless, knocked
the wind right out of her. They were like love letters in picture form. Nobody
had ever done anything remotely as wonderful as this.
“Hey.” She heard from behind her. “Like
what you see?”
“More like love.” Izzy whispered as Clary
wrapped her arms around her from behind and pressed a light kiss on her cheek.
“Clary.” Izzy said, turning around to look
at the girl she loved. “They’re wonderful. You—you’re wonderful.”
Clary beamed. “Thank you.”
She pulled away and took Izzy’s hand in
hers. “Come.” Clary said, gesturing with her head towards a closed door. “Your
night of fun awaits you.”
“Good thing I don’t have to wait.” Izzy
giggled as Clary pulled her into the room.
She turned on the light to reveal an
entirely plain white room, with dozens of buckets full of balloons.
“What’s—what’s this?” Izzy frowned, looking
around at the bare walls.
“You said you’ve been really stressed out
at school lately.” Clary shrugged, showing her hands into her jeans’ pockets.
“So, I figured we could have a fun, de-stressing night instead of some fancy
When Izzy continued to stare at her, Clary
explained. “We’re painting the walls.” She paused to pick up a balloon in each
hand. “With balloons full of paint.”
Before she could react or process, a paint
balloon came flying at her, splattering all over her the front of her shirt,
turning it red. She gasped, her jaw dropping to the floor as the red-haired
girl burst into hysterics.
“Clary fucking Fray!” Izzy shouted but she
was starting to laugh too. She grabbed a balloon in each hand and threw them at
Clary, turning her blue. They grabbed more and more balloons, throwing them at
each other and at the walls, painting it in a vibrant mix of colours.
When they’d finally ran out of balloons,
the entire room was covered in splashes of paint. It looked amazing, although
Izzy preferred more of a dark glittery aesthetic.
She sighed and leaned against a wall,
wiping a goop of paint off her arm while Clary leaned against the opposite
“You’re blue.” Izzy said, grinning at her.
There was blue paint on her arms, her legs, her hair and her face. And she was
still the most gorgeous person Izzy had ever had the pleasure of looking at.
“And you’re red.” Clary said, smiling back.
Izzy walked over to her, putting an arm on
either side of her head and pushing her against the wall. Clary tilted her head
up, her green eyes boring into Izzy’s as though she was looking right into her
soul. And she gave her the brightest smile she’d ever seen.
Authors Note: Reblog with your fav bit if you want bc it would make me v.happy
(This banner had been made by the awesome and amazing artist @benteja. i am so honored that she had drawn this banner for this story. please go and show her all the love in the world that she deserves!!! \[^o^]/)
Author: marj-n-ken Fandom: South Park Pairing: Butters/Kenny Genre: Romance, Hurt/Comfort Rating: T Series: one-shot Beta: basicbewitch Summary:
When Butters calls crying, all Kenny wants to do is make his best friend happy again.
Genre: Fan Fiction Pairing: Jai Courtney/OFC (Roo) Warnings: Language Rating: PG13 Length: Short Story Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.
A/N: Sorry that this took so freaking long, summer got busy and writer’s block still sucks hairy balls!
They don’t talk about it in the morning. They don’t talk about anything really. Not before she leaves, not the dozens of times he doesn’t call her back, not for weeks, not for months. Three months.
He doesn’t visit, he doesn’t call, he never shows up and she wants to hate him. Wants to hate him because he’s the one who told her to leave, he’s the one who never even gave her a chance to say anything, he’s the one who refuses to call her back because he “doesn’t want it to be easier for the travelers to find him and Tom.“ The travelers who are now back in Mystic Falls and as far away from them as they could possibly be. Like they’ve got tracking devices on them or they’re monitoring her calls. Like their lives have suddenly become Mission Impossible.
She wants to hate him, she really does. She needs him now, maybe more than ever before, which if you think about is insane because she managed on her own for years. Without him. Perfectly fine. With her mom.
"Just a little bit further and we’ll be there.”
“You said that three times already,” Liz replies, taking a break and leaning against a tree. “Where are we going, anyway?”
“You’ll see.” Liz raises an eyebrow but follows her anyway. She knows she’d never actually get an answer out of Caroline, not once she’s made up her mind.
They come to a stop a few minutes later when they reach a clearing. There’s a small mat laid out on the ground with a picnic basket and a vase of lilies. “What’s all this?” She asks, staring at Caroline, mouth agape.
“These last few months have been… a lot.” Caroline sits down on the mat and opens the basket to empty its contents. “I just wanted to do something special for you. You deserve a break.”
Liz gives her a warm smile, eyes tearing up slowly. “Thank you.” She takes her daughters hand and pulls her in for a hug. Caroline rests her head on her shoulder and breathes her in. She smells like lavender, she always does, it’s been like that her whole life.
It’s good to know some things never change. ….
“What do you mean they’re gone?!” She nearly trips down the staircase.
“I mean they’re gone.” She can hear the smile in Bonnie’s voice, the joy, relief. Relief that they made it out of this, all of them, alive. “Damon and Elena have checked and re-checked almost five times now. They’re nowhere near Mystic Falls.”
“What does that mean?” She’s playing with the keychain on her car keys. It’s one Stefan had given her years ago; a snow globe of Mystic Falls, of all places. It was the first thing she looked for when she got back from Portland, found it buried in the back of her closet in a box with her old scrapbook. “Are they… dead?”
“I don’t know.”
“What if they’re in Portland, or… wherever Tom and Stefan are right now? What if they’ve found them?”
“Caroline, they’re safe.” She can hear the hesitation in Bonnie’s voice even as she’s talking. It’s not very reassuring. “The travelers are gone, okay? This is a good thing. We’re allowed to not worry for a minute or two.”
“Caroline, you need to relax, okay? They’re fine, I promise.” Bonnie says. “To be sure, I found a spell that might help me track them by tacking their magic.”
“If it tracks magic, won’t it just show vampires? Isn’t that going to screw up your whole witchy hijinks thing.” She asks, still twirling the snow globe around in her hand.
“The whole witchy hijinks thing will work. It’s specific to their magic.” Bonnie assures her. “I promise.” She pauses and takes in a hasty breath. ”They’re both going to be fine, Caroline.”
She nods slowly to herself like if she does it enough she’ll believe herself. “How does the spell work?”
“I’ll use something to link the spell to the travelers so that when I do it, it’ll only track them, no other magic forms.” It sounds easy enough.
“There’s just one problem.” Caroline reminds her. “We don’t have anything with a link to the travelers, except-“
“The blood of the Doppelgängers.”
“Yeah, except we have no idea where Tom and Stefan are right now. Unless… Is there still some of Stefan’s blood stored in the hospital?”
“No, but it’s fine. We got some of Stefan’s last night.” Her keys slip out of her hands onto the ground.
“You saw Stefan?” She’s lucid enough to be slightly embarrassed at how her voice cracks at the end.
“No, no he compelled a guy on a train to Virginia.”
She bends down to pick up the keys. “So we’re just compelling humans for nothing now? How are you okay with that?”
“I’m not, Care, trust me. It’s just safer– for all of us– if they don’t come back yet.”
She’s biting her tongue now. “Yeah, you’re right.”
Bonnie sighs. “How’s your mom?”
“She’s doing a lot better, the doctors are pretty confident in the chemo so far.” She draws a breath, listens for something, anything. She thinks she hears a whispered “hmmm, good” but she’s not sure. “Bon, I have to go but call me if anything changes, okay? Or if you need my help with anything.”
“Thanks.” She says, sighing. “Bye.” ….
The doctors eventually give up. There’s really only so many things modern medicine can do before it stops doing anything except hurting her, and apparently curing cancer is not one of them. The chemo isn’t much help either. It drains her mom, leaves her feeling empty, and ends up barely making an impact.
Caroline can still remember when her mom caught her and Bonnie lying in her old treehouse. When they promised each other they’d marry one another someday because boys were such jerks. A boy she’d been crushing on that year had found out why her parents were getting divorced and thought up some really ‘colorful’ names for her. All the kids in school joined in.
She remembers her mom stopping at his house the next day after school, remembers her going in to talk for a while and coming out with a satisfied smile on her face. She remembers never even hearing his voice again.
Her mom, Sheriff Forbes, defender of Mystic Falls, a true hero. She’s always been her role model. Always. Even when they fought. She’s always been someone Caroline could look up to– could look for.
She’s always been here.
“So it’s decided?” Caroline says, rubbing her eyes with the hem of her sweater. Her skin feels raw. “Just like that? You’re going to die?”
“Sweetheart, it’s not that simple.” Liz reaches for her hand and pulls her into a hug, brushing her fingers through her blond hair.
“I know,” Caroline whispers into her shoulder, trying to hold back the fresh tears threatening to fall. “God, I know I just…”
“I know.” Liz smiles, presses a kiss to Caroline’s cheek. “I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.”
“I promise.” ….
“Stefan?” She’s never felt so nervous in her entire life. She’s not sure why. It’s Stefan, for God’s sake. Stefan, her best friend, who she can be her insecure neurotic control freak-y self in front of, who she can always be honest with. The same Stefan that hasn’t called or texted or so much as breathed in her direction for the last 3 months. She shouldn’t feel anxious if anything she should be furious. Or just hang up. He’s silent for so long, she wonders if he’s even listening. “I can hear you breathing, and if you called to tell me you’re a jerk, then you’re wasting your time because I already know that.”
“That’s not why I called.” He says, she hears him shuffling around. “Look, something came up.”
“You’re not even going to say hi first?”
“Caroline, you need to get down to Portland.” He speaks louder, clearer, like if she doesn’t hear him that’s it.
“What’s going on?” There are at least a hundred thoughts running through her head. “Are you okay? Is Tom?”
“No, the uh… it’s the travelers-”
“They found you?” She can feel her heart palpitations increasing. The room is spinning and she feels like she’s going to be sick. “You guys need to move. Now. I’ll f-”
“Caroline!” It’s louder still. “They have him.” He pauses, takes in a deep breath, and she waits silently for him to say out loud what she’s just realized. “They have Tom.” ….
“Are you sure we’re going the right way?” She meets him halfway at a rest stop in the middle of nowhere. Bonnie did a locator spell while she was driving up here and she’s just found Tom.
“Yeah. These are the directions Bonnie gave.” It’s all he‘s said the entire drive. Including the time he almost ran over a lady crossing the street. Eventually she gives up, she wants to say more though; wants to ask how he is, wants to yell at him for not calling her for three months, wants to ask what the hell he was talking about three months ago and if that’s why he’s been avoiding her, ignoring her, cutting her off completely? Was he about to say what she thought he was, that he has feelings for her?
She hasn’t allowed herself to really think about it at all over the past few months. She’s managed to distract herself with making sure her mom is comfortable and making sure Tom is safe… she’s been keeping all thoughts of Stefan and all feelings she may or may not have for him (and vice versa apparently) filed under anger. Because, honestly, all she can think is how could he? How could he start something like that? Go into a conversation with her, basically blurt out that he might have feelings for her and then not bring it up again for weeks? What the hell is she supposed to do with that? She’s with Tom.
Being here with him and knowing how he feels has been clawing at her for the past four hours. Even though she knows she’s being irrational. Because even if what she thought he said was true, it’s been 3 months. A lot can change in 3 months. Not that his maybe feelings would change anything. She’s with Tom.
“So how’s your mom?” She sighs and turns to him, her head already spinning. She thinks about it for a minute.
“Better.” He doesn’t seem satisfied with her answer, she can feel him watching her for a good minute or two before he eventually nods and sits back into his seat.
“Good, that’s uh, that’s really good.”
“We’re almost there.” It’s just past midnight when they finally pull off of the highway. He’s still barely said anything and they’ve been in the car for hours. It’s making her blood boil. It’s the only thing she can think about other than how much she’s missed him.
They’ve been through so much together and these past few months she’s just missed him a lot. She’s about to tell him that before she’s distracted by the moonlight reflecting off of his face and back on to the window. It reminds her of their prom night.
She’s outside watching the picture show she’d spent almost the entire year putting together when he joins her. “Hey.”
“You okay?” He hands her a drink, moves his thumb over the rim of his paper cup. “What’s going on?”
She’s not sure what makes her say it, she’s just staring at the pictures and at him, and she realizes he looks different in this light. Less tired and more… young. He looks good. Really good. “I wish we could stay here forever.”
He gives her a pointed look, watches her nervously take a sip of her punch. “Mystic falls or the dance? Because I’m going to have to oppose to both of them.”
She laughs at that and he follows suit. “No.. no I mean here. Together.” She sighs. “You know, you, me, Elena, Bonnie, Matt…”
She sucks in a deep breath, wipes her eye before tears can even think of falling. “Hmm.” He offers her a reassuring smile. “God, we’ve already lost so many people. We need each other…” she runs a hand through her hair. “Do I sound crazy? I need to move on eventually right?”
He shakes his head. “Caroline, you’re not crazy. I think you sound perfectly normal. Dare I say, right even.”
She punches his shoulder and laughs her caramel laugh again. “It’s okay to want to hold on.” He continues. “You’re supposed to. The people you care about are all that’s important. But I think, no matter what happens, whether we’re all together or separated, we’re still always going to be a part of each other. I mean I’ve been alive for over 160 years and I’ve only ever been at my best when I remember the people I’ve lost, the ones who gave up their lives trying to protect me and the ones who are the most important to me.”
She smiles, takes his hand in hers and feels calmer already. “Thanks, Stefan, and I hope I make it on that list one day.”
“We’re almost there.” She says and Stefan nods. Caroline sighs turning to face him as he focuses on the road in front of them. “So you’re just avoiding me now?” It sounds harsh. Good.
“What?” He turns his head for a minute, stares at her like she’s gone insane and then turns back to the road.
“I said are you just going to keep ignoring me?” She repeats firmly. “I mean if I knew you were going to be like this, I’d have driven up myself.” He’s still staring at her confused.
“Caroline, I’m not avoiding you.” He says hesitantly. “I need to focus right now and I wasn’t sure whether or not you wanted to talk to me.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“I.. You said.. Just forget it.” He shakes his hand, taps his hands on the steering wheel rhythmically as they start picking up speed “Just… I’m not ignoring you, okay? I’m sitting right here.”
“I don’t… What do you want me to say?” He sounds frustrates, it just makes her even angrier. He has no right to be mad at her right now.
“Anything.” She screams. “God, You haven’t said anything. I haven’t seen you in three months. I needed you and you didn’t even call… not once.”
“It was for your safety.” He says, but he can’t meet her eyes.
“That’s a load of crap. We both know that’s not the reason!”
“What does that mean?” She doesn’t answer.
“Forget it.” She unbuckles her seat belt.
“Not now.” She says, pointing to the building just beside them. “We’re here.” …
The first thing she sees when they walk into the warehouse is blood. Lots of it. Everywhere. She lets herself think the worst.
“Over here!” She follows Stefan’s voice to the next room where Tom is lying on a metal bench. He’s bleeding. There is so much blood. Everywhere.
She’s suddenly intensely aware of the fact that she’s a vampire. She can feel her senses heightening, and the metallic taste of blood fill her senses, on the tip of her tongue. “Hey… hey,” Stefan says slowly, he walks towards her and places both of his hands on her shoulders, turns her around. “You need to focus, okay? Breathe… “
“I can’t. I can’t the blood… it’s” she covers her face with her hands.
“Hey, it’s okay,” Stefan assures her, gently pulling her hands down. “Caroline, you’re fine. Just breathe.” She does. Slowly. In and out.
She rushes over to Tom and slowly tears at the skin on her palm, pressing it to his lips. “Just drink.” She whispers. He looks incredibly pale.
“You okay?” Stefan asks.
“Yeah, I’m good.” She says. “Are they gone?”
“I’m not sure.” He picks up his pace, moves around the room, tries to get a better view of the place.
“Just go, I’ll come find you in a minute,” Caroline says as the wounds on Tom’s hands start to disappear.
“No, it’s fine. Stay with him. I’ll be back.” ….
“You sure you’re okay?” Caroline says, pressing a hand to his forehead and examining him. “I’m pretty sure we should get you to a hospital just in case.”
“Caroline, relax.” He takes her hands in his, pretends he doesn’t see the way her breath hitches in her throat, pretends his doesn’t either. “I’m fine.”
“You lost a lot of blood.” She says. Again.
“And I survived.” Tom smiles, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Thanks to you.”
“I’ve missed you.” She whispers, voice even lower than usual. The tiny vein on her head is popping out and it’s all he can do to ignore it. It’s adorable.
“I’ve missed you too.” He says, wraps his arms around her waist. She leans up on her toes and presses her lips into his. She’s an even better kisser than he remembers. It hasn’t even been that long, so he’s not exactly sure why he feels like he’s just gotten his first breath of air in the longest time. He can feel a smile forming on her lips and he’s almost certain his expression matches hers to a T. “Hmmm.” He says, grinning. “I’ve really missed you.”
She laughs and her cheeks turn a soft pink, eyes gleaming before she takes a breath and her laughter dies down. “What about you?” He asks suddenly. “You feeling okay? How’s your mom?”
“Honestly?” He nods. “She’s not doing much better. She’s already given up on the treatment and me… I don’t think there’s anything to be done.”
He pushes a fallen strand of hair behind her ear, pulls her towards him and wraps his arms around her. “I’m sorry.” He says, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.
She leans into his chest, breathes him in. He still smells of blood. She didn’t even think of bringing a change of clothes, for any of them. She didn’t really think about anything other than getting him back.
“I’ve really missed you.” He brushes off a tear sliding down her cheek with the back of his thumb. She looks up to meet his eyes and he leans down, kisses her slowly, till her entire body goes numb. It’s reassuring and she’s missed him and missed being around him and everything about him.
“There’s no one here.” They both jerk at the sound Stefan’s voice, and Caroline reluctantly pulls away, wipes at her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. She can feel both of their eyes following her as she makes her way around the car to the passenger side.
“You guys okay?” Stefan says, cautiously approaching them.
“Yeah,” Caroline says, calmer than he’d expected. “Yeah, we’re good.”
“Did you find anything?” Tom asks.
“They’re gone.” He sighs, climbing into the car and slamming the door shut. “All of them. There’s no one here, but they left everything behind.”
She shakes her head. “We’ll find them, don’t worry.”
“What else?” Tom says, eyes trained on Stefan. He’s not even blinking.
“What?” Caroline asks, turns to face Stefan. “What is it?”
“Damon and Elena might have a plan.”
“They found a spell in one of Bonnie’s old grimoires.” He pauses. “It’s a darker magic than Bonnie’s used to but she thinks she can pull it off.”
“Stefan, what is it?”
“She has to stop my heart.” He turns his head to look at Tom, turns back to her. “Elena’s too.” ….
“They’re insane.” She tells Tom. They’re waiting at a gas station for Stefan while he grabs some coffees from the Quick Stop.
She hears him stop behind her right after she says it, turns to face him. “You’re insane.” She spits out. “This is insane.”
He should’ve known this was coming, he’d been expecting it the entire drive to Mystic Falls. They were just a few miles outside of Whitmore, which is much further than he’d expected her to go without saying anything. Still, it catches him off guard. “Bonnie’s spell will stop whatever they’re planning.” He says, trying to convince himself as much as her.
“I don’t care.”
“It’ll only last for a few minutes,” He starts, opening his door, but she doesn’t blink. “No doppelgänger, no spells. All their magic or anti-magic or whatever it is will be undone.”
“I don’t care.”
“At the very least it will buy us some time to come up with a better plan.”
She laughs, it’s thick and cold. “So we’re risking your life, Elena’s life, Bonnie’s life.. everything. Just to come up with a better plan?”
“No. Let me finish.” She taps her foot rhythmically on the cobbled sidewalk. “I’m not letting all of you risk your lives just because we can’t think of something better. It’s stupid and reckless.”
“This is the only way we’ve got.” He says. “Are you really okay with letting the travelers passenger themselves into everyone in this town one by one?” When she doesn’t answer he nods. “That’s what I thought”.
“There’s no way Damon agreed to this.” It’s all she can come up with. He wouldn’t. Not when Elena is involved, not when Stefan is, not to something like this.
“He did.” He sighs, leaving out the part about just how reluctant he was.
“You’re actually serious.” She says, mouth forming an ‘o’ as her hands fall to her sides. “You’re seriously doing this.”
“Caroline I’m really sorry if you don’t agree with it, but I already told Bonnie yes.”
“Then why’d you even bother telling me?”
“I thought you should know.” He can’t meet her eyes.
“What about Tom?” She asks, avoiding his gaze just as much. “Would he need to…”
“No, just the two of us is enough.” He assures her. “Besides, Bonnie’s not sure if this spell would even work on him. He’s a human.”
“So it is dangerous?”
“We’re going to be fine, Caroline. Trust me.” ….
“I can’t believe they’re going through with this.” She says, waves her hands around frantically. Furiously. “They’re officially insane.” Bonnie’s already started the spell, so there’s no point in complaining now. She heard Bonnie start chanting a while ago and she still hasn’t stopped.
“You should go in there,” Tom says. “They need you, and I know you want to be there for them.”
She’s still wary. “Why won’t you?”
“I’m scared.” She sighs, covers her face with her hands and takes a deep breath, putting he hands back to her side. “If this doesn’t… If it doesn’t work, they could actually die. And there’s no turning into a vampire or anything else mythical, they’re really gone.”
He takes her hands in his. “Look, do you trust Elena and Stefan?”
“Do you trust Bonnie?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Then why don’t you trust that she would never do anything like this if she weren’t one hundred percent sure it would work?” She sighs in relief, nods her head. <i>You’re right.</i> “Just go in there. They won’t even notice you, they’re unconscious. And Bonnie could use the support.”
“Fine.” She leans up, presses a hasty kiss on his cheek. “You wanna come with me?”
“Thanks, but for as many times as all of this magic has saved my life, I’m still getting used it and it kind of scares the crap out of me.”
She rolls her eyes, cracking a smile, and makes her way into the crypt. …
Everything’s going great, so far. Bonnie’s just about done and the spell looks like it’s working already. It’s good.
She knows it. She’s thinking it’s insane when Liv storms in, screaming. “You need to stop your spell now.” She says, Luke standing behind her idly.
Caroline’s in front of them as quickly as she can. Bonnie keeps chanting. “What the hell are you doing here?”
“You have no idea what you’re doing,” Liv tells Bonnie, ignoring her completely. “You’re playing right into his hand.”
“What? He who?” Caroline asks.
“Stop!” Luke screams, and Bonnie keeps going.
“Get out.” Caroline insists. “Now!” Before she can see what’s happening, Liv is saying something and then there’s a piece of wood flying in the air. It tears into 3 separate shards and goes directly towards Bonnie, Stefan, and Elena. “Stop!” It comes out more like a whimper. Barely audible.
Bonnie’s candles go out and Liv and Luke are gone. ….
“What the hell did you do?” She yells, comes to a halt right in front of them.
“We just saved your friends lives,” Luke tells her, inches closer to Liv. “You’re welcome.”
“Your boyfriends fine by the way.” Liv interrupts. She turns around and Tom’s lying on the ground in front of Stefan’s car. She thinks she stutters out a “what did you do to him?” but she feels paralyzed.
“He’s just asleep,” Liv says maliciously, she can’t tell if she’s being honest.
“Well, you won,” Caroline says, raising her hands in surrender. “You hurt us, we’re broken. Are you happy?” They’re both silent. “Please just leave them alone. All of them.”
“Like he said, we saved them. You too.” Luke starts to walk away, gesturing for her to follow. “You think this is over? You of all people should prepare yourself. This is only the beginning.”
“What do you mean?”
“Don’t play with magic you can’t understand.” ….
When she gets back inside, Elena’s sitting up slowly while Bonnie is reluctantly drinking Damon’s blood. Stefan is still unconscious.
“What’s wrong?” Caroline asks, getting to his side as fast as she can. “Why isn’t he up?”
“In a minute, Blondie.” Damon snaps. “Need to fix witchy over here so she can fix Stefan.”
“Damon he’s desiccating !” Elena shouts and Caroline takes a step back. She feels sick. She can’t even look at him, his skin is turning grey and she wants to reach forward, to do something to scream, but she feels sick and paralyzed. “I think the stake is in his heart.”
Damon looks just as sick. No, more. “Help!” Elena screams it’s deafening. He rushes over to Stefan’s side and plunges a hand into his chest.
Caroline turns around. She can’t watch this. She can’t breathe, she can’t even think straight. She can, however, smell Bonnie’s blood pooled around her from here and that tiny voice in her head that sounds a lot like Stefan is not piping up, not telling her to stop. She thinks she won’t.
“It’s out.” She hears Elena sigh, thinks she’s talking to her but she can’t be sure. Not until she hears his heartbeat. It’s barely there. She wouldn’t even hear it if it weren’t out of sync with the rest of theirs. His slips back into consciousness slowly and manages to sit up. “Did it work?” He splutters. Elena laughs and wraps her arms around him, Damon gives him a pat on his shoulder while Bonnie watches them from across the room.
She feels sick. She doesn’t realize she’s moving until she feels her feet carrying her past the door and into the open air. …
“Where were you, Damon?” It comes out broken, a sob. She’s just tired.
“Sabrina the teenage bitch snapped my neck.” He comes to a stop beside her, leans his head against the door frame. “I was out cold. Did she say what she wanted?”
“She said she was here to help.”
She rolls her eyes. “Yeah well, it’s all I got from them. I was pretty distracted by all of my friends being on the brink of death. I needed to get back inside, I wasn’t going to wait for her to give me the long version.”
“Hey,” He presses a hand to her elbow, she can see his eyes soften, this is new territory. “I’m not blaming you.” The way he says it is very un-Damon like.
“Good.” She says. “Because I’m not blaming you either.” She lets out a sigh. “How’s Tom?”
“Bonnie managed to get him up.” He pauses, she can feel him staring. “Stefan’s fine, by the way.” She doesn’t say anything. “You mad at him or something?”
“Or something.” She doesn’t have the energy to argue with him right now. Especially about this. “Hurt, mostly. But I’ll get over it.” She pulls at the fraying cotton on her sweater. “I just missed him. A lot. He’s my best friend.”
“He missed you too,” Damon assures her, offers her a small smile.
It helps. ….
He’s not sure what he’s been doing for all this time. Why he’s been doing it. And if he wasn’t sure before, when he could’ve pretended he didn’t know better and Caroline spent three months being mad at him, he definitely isn’t sure now that he’s just heard that’s the exact opposite of what happened.
He considers waiting, giving her a little more time to cool down, space to breathe before he’s apologizing for everything he’s done all at once, but he’s waited long enough. Too long already.
“Hey.” She’s sitting on the steps outside, waiting. She looks tired. She has since he saw her a few days ago, all the time.
“Hey.” She offers him a smile. God, he can’t believe he’s taken this long to finally talk to her. He can’t believe he’s gone this long without seeing her smile. It feels like he’s been deprived. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m good.” He sighs, sits down beside her. He watches her rub the palms of her hands together and shakes his head. “No, uh, actually. I’m an idiot.”
She gives him questioning look.
“I’m sorry I didn’t call.” He says, blurts it out. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I… you’re my best friend, Caroline, and I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me. I just… I was scared things would be different between us. I didn’t want them to be.”
She swallows, takes a deep breath even as her eyes soften, searches for something in his. He can feel her eyes on him, can’t bear to meet them. “Why would they?…” She smiles again. “They’re not.” He presses a hand to her knee and looks up at her.
“So we’re okay?”
“Yeah.” She takes his hand. “We’ve always been okay.”
He gives her hand a gentle squeeze. “Let’s go home then.” ….
It finally feels like it is, home. Finally. They’re all together. They manage to find a routine, a new normal, to get settled in pretty quickly.
Tom gets a job at Whitmore Med school. It’s part-time and he’d honestly prefer to be in an ambulance than in hallways filled with drunk students needing a stomach pump. Still, it’s good. Stefan is back at the boarding house, and she’s at back in school, staying in a small apartment building close to campus with her mom. It’s smaller than what they’re used to but it means she can be back home at a moments notice and it’s closer to her doctors. She’s considered dropping out of Whitmore entirely but her mom threatened to stay someplace else if it affected her education.
It’s good. It is.
Right up until it isn’t.
“They tried to kill Elena.” She feels sick. Again.
She doesn’t even bother asking who, why. She knows, she’s been waiting for the other shoe to drop for weeks. “When?”
“Last night,” Bonnie says, she can hear her shaky breath. “Whatever they did it… it stripped her of her vampirism, she was human again, drowning.” She lets out a sigh, Caroline thinks she hears a sob but doesn’t say anything. “Damon got there in time, stopped the spell. Caroline, they’re not going to stop, you know they won’t. Not until they get what they want.”
“What they want is the doppelgängers. So what do we do?”
“I need you to be bait.”
“I’m in.” She knows Bonnie would never bring this to her if they weren’t desperate. No ways she’s letting everyone else sacrifice themselves, no way she’s putting their lives in any more danger. “Whatever it takes.” ….
He doesn’t eavesdrop. It’s not his thing, never has been. Especially not like this, but it’s not really his fault.
He’s putting away some things, taking out weapons for their preposterous plan while Bonnie gives Caroline one last rundown of the plan. He’s going over to ask how much vervain they could really need (these aren’t even vampires) when he hears his name. Still, he thinks they’re talking to him and he’s about to respond until he hears her.
“Bonnie, can we not..” She says, let’s out an exasperated sigh. He can picture Bonnie rolling her eyes.
“I just think this is something you need to talk about, if not with him then… talk to me, Care.” He inches closer to the room, tries to find a clearer spot. “What happened?”
Caroline sighs. “He… he said… I don’t even know what he said. I mean I know what I think he said, but… that can’t be what he said.”
“Because I can’t deal with that.”
“Because!” She snaps. “Because I cant, okay. I don’t even… Stefan doesn’t have feelings for me, Bonnie.” Oh. He starts to back away slowly, suddenly feeling like he’s violating something. He can’t…
“Just forget about whatever Stefan said or didn’t say for a second,” Bonnie suggests, he hears her move away, further into the room. “What about you? Do you have feelings for him?”
He doesn’t stick around long enough to hear her answer. ….
“Be safe, okay?” Tom says anxiously. He’s insisted on walking her to her car, before she heads off to Whitmore, to make sure the travelers are there. To make sure they haven’t left town already. Because at this point, that would honestly be worse.
“Always.” She says with a small smile, rolls her eyes and shakes her head a little.
“I’m serious.” He says, his thumbs gently caressing the back of her hands. “You like to go rushing into things. I mean you’re brave, insanely brave, actually, it’s one of the things I love about you, but.. be careful okay?”
She freezes, takes a moment to catch her breath and then meets his eyes. “What did you say?”
“Be careful.” He grins sheepishly, bounces up and down on his heels.
“I love you, Caroline.” She bites her lip, flashes him the warmest smile he’s ever seen.
Caroline moves her head closer to him. He stands frozen, both from fear and excitement. She leans in, so her forehead rests against his, closes her eyes. Even through the sound of her own shaky breath, she can hear his, slow and uneven. "For the record,” she says, barely above a whisper. He presses a kiss to her lips. Exhilarating. “I love you too.” …
“You ready for this?” Stefan turns to see Damon walk in, eagerly takes the drink from his hand.
He shakes his head. “Not really.”
“You sure you’re okay?” Damon asks cautiously, shoving his hands into his pockets.
“Damon if you have something to say just say it.” He snaps. “I’m too tired to figure out what the hell you’re trying to say.”
“You and Caroline.” He says. This again. He’d really appreciate it if just once no one brought this up. “How’d you mess that one up?”
He feels his blood boiling. “I told her I liked her.” Damon waits, stares at him expectantly. <i>And?/i> “In Portland, before she left for Mystic Falls.”
“Oh.” Damon rubs a thumb over his forehead, tries to process.
“I didn’t actually say that I had feelings for her, it never got that far.” Damon looks like he’s about to burst out laughing.
If he has anything to say about it, he doesn’t. “Here.” He says, passing his still full glass over to Stefan. “I think you need this way more than I do.” ….
“Can you explain to me again why we’re at a dance?” She rolls her eyes. In her defense, she has explained it to him almost 3 times in the past thirty minutes. It’s just a little hard for him to focus when she’s dressed like <i>that</i>. His fingers are rhythmically tapping on the bare skin of her back, a little tactic he’d devised to distract himself from getting distracted by her. Needless to say it wasn’t working very well.
“You’re not even listening!” She exclaims, coming to a stop in the middle of the ballroom.
“I’m sorry.” He apologizes, tries to really focus this time. Really. “One last time. Please.”
She sighs. “Fine.” Lifts her hand back to the back of his neck and rests her arm on his shoulder. <i>Focus.</i> “As I’ve said the last 3 times, for some reason Liv is on the planning committee for the dances and when I asked a cheerleader on the committee she said Liv had insisted on having this dance <i>tonight</i> and every idea they’d gotten for the dance was courtesy of her. Including, the idea to invite some lovely alumni from the neighboring town… Mystic Falls.”
“We sure she isn’t just a very committed party planner?” She glares at him, takes his hand and slowly leads him off the dance floor, towards the bar. “I’ll take that as a no.”
“Thanks.” She bites.
He smirks back at her. She wants to slap him. “What?”
“Did you really compel a cheerleader?” He bites back a laugh.
She rolls her eyes, taking a sip of her cocktail. “Oh shut up.”
“So you want to talk about the fact that you had a costume prepared for this dance; the one we only decided we were going to this morning?”
“Nope.” She says, popping the ‘p’. “‘Cause then I’d have to admit that while you and Tom were running for your lives, I was costume shopping and planning on going to dances and finding the perfect outfit which I’m not even sure this one is anymore.” She sighs.
“Caroline. “ He says hesitantly.
“Don’t be.” He tells her, places a hand on top of hers. “You don’t need to feel bad. You shouldn’t. Not for living your life.”
“While you were running for yours.”
“It wasn’t that dramatic.” He laughs, she flashes him a bright smile and empties her glass in one sip, shakes her head at the burn.
“You were in danger.” She corrects.
“Barely.” Her eyes are burning holes into his skin.
“Well, I’m glad I did.” He offers. “I missed you.” He smiles. “A lot.”
“Me too.” She gulps and he cheeks go pink, smiling at him, “I missed you.” She subtly points to the entrance behind him where Liv and a group people he recognizes as some travelers walk in. He takes her hand slowly, pulls her towards him and moves to the center of the room. She laughs, as he twirls her around abruptly.
“It is by the way.” He whispers. They’re moving left to right, back and forth, it’s nice moving in sync with her for once. He likes how fast they manage to find a rhythm.
“The perfect outfit.” He still can’t focus on anything else. ….
They wait all night. For the other shoe to drop, for a chance to finally end this, for something.
Just drinking, dancing, more drinking and even more dancing. He’s never felt so intoxicated in his entire life, add that to the fact that he’s been gawking at his best friend all night and it’s you’ve got the perfect recipe for disaster.
“Well, that was a complete waste.” She says. Her throat is dry and raspy, it makes her voice sound like honey. It’s too much.
“Tell me about it.” He’s starting again; she’s sitting on a bench and her feet are still tapping to the music in the ballroom. It’s extremely loud.
“At least I get to tell all the girls in school I danced with Stefan Salvatore all night.” She smiles, tugs at his hand to pull herself up. She climbed out of her heels about an hour ago and now they’re just swinging around in her hands. “Everyone’s going to be so jealous.”
“Haha, very funny.”
“I’m not kidding.” She assures him, leads the way to her apartment building. ”You’re like a legend. Every girl had a crush on you.” She pauses, watches his laughter die down. Involuntarily meets his eyes and can’t seem to shake his gaze.
He smiles again after a minute. “Even Bonnie?”
She rolls her eyes “Are you kidding? Especially Bonnie!” Her laughter is infectious. He comes to a stop as they reach her building and he’s not focusing on the fact that she still hasn’t let go of his hand. Not at all. “I really had fun tonight, Stefan. I know that wasn’t the plan, but…”
“I didn’t realize how much I missed you being around all the time.” She says, clears her throat and turns away for a second.
“I can’t tell if that’s a compliment or a complaint.” He laughs.
“Both.” She fishes her keys out of her purse. “I’m really glad you’re back.”
“Me too.” She smiles as he brushes a strand of hair out of her face, tucks it behind her ear. She’s suddenly very aware of her hand in his, her heart pounding. “Listen, Caroline…” she can tell it’s coming before he starts. She’s not ready to hear it (again) ”What I said… the night you left Portland, I just wanted-“
“I’m sorry,” she says, tears on her cheek suddenly crystal clear in the moonlight. “I can’t do this right now.” She says walking into the building and away from him. ….
“Caroline, slow down!” He yells. She’s pretty sure he’s just woken up half of the building. She can hear him getting closer, should probably run into her apartment, lock the door and not come out for a week but her feet are killing her and her blood alcohol level is abnormally high. He catches up to her eventually, clutches her wrist and turns her around. Her eyes are still wet and there’s a small mascara smudge under her eyelashes.
“Stefan… don’t.” She pleads. “I’m still with Tom. I… I’m”
“Good, I want you to be happy, I just..” He turns around, ready to leave. “I just need to say it. Just once. Please.” She wants to stop him, slap him, scream.
“I like you, Caroline.” She wants to scream. “I really really like you.” He sucks in a deep breath. “I know the timing is horrible and the place and everything about it, I just… I need you to know.”
“Stefan, please stop.” She says it’s calmer than he’d expected. Then again, she’s not exactly saying what he’d expected her to say either.
“I do.” He says, firmly. “I like you.”
“You keep saying that, but ever since Portland you haven’t been able to have an actual conversation with me. You barely look at me. You won’t even talk to me. I know it’s hard being back here, with Damon… and Elena but I just needed to know why. I let myself think it was because of what you said to me. That it was because of me. Because then it was my fault..“ she sighs, wipes the back of her hand over her eyes until the skin looks almost raw. “How could you do that, if you like me? Even if you didn’t.”
"I do.” He repeats. “It’s not your fault.”
“Do you know how insane this sounds? Are you even hearing yourself? Stefan, you’re.” His hand is on her hip before she knows what’s happening and he’s pulling her closer, crashing into her. She inhales sharply. He brushes his lips against hers, slowly, his hands on her cheeks and hers around his neck. He doesn’t pull away until she gasps for air.
“I’m sorry.” He whispers as she stares at him, still speechless. “I… I almost died so many times and I missed you and I just.. I really needed to do that. I’m sorry.”
Jeremy who grew up in a bad home. Jeremy who’s dad never made enough money to keep them properly afloat, but was also the kind of guy who wouldn’t let his wife work. Jeremy who had to try to be the perfect student to gain any sort of parental approval, who was no stranger to a backhanded slap if he received anything less than an A.
Jeremy who went to school hungry more often then not, who rejoiced in free school lunch programs during the school year, because that meant at least one reasonably substantial meal a day. Jeremy whose growth stunted because of childhood malnutrition. Jeremy who spent a lot of gym classes as a kid trying hard to keep up on an empty stomach.
Jeremy who graduated high school with honours and almost 20,000 dollars in scholarships and STILL had to work two jobs to make ends meet. Jeremy who had 12 hours of homework a week and worked almost 30 hours on top of classes and still lived off of 99 cent stove top ramen.
Jeremy Dooley who graduated university JUST BARELY, and with so much debt he never thought he’d pay it off. Jeremy who moved to Los Santos praying to god he’d find a job, and just ended up on the street. Jeremy who did a hell of a lot of things that he is not even kind of proud of just to survive. He spent time as a go-for for a few gangs, picking up guns and dropping off threats, who did a hell of a lot worse to keep the crews from throwing him out or beating him up (who still has nightmares sometimes about the things that they did to him when he fucked up).
Jeremy who got picked up one night by a really sweet lady after being kicked out of the last crew he was working for (and left with quite the array or cuts and bruises), tired and freezing and so hungry. He wouldn’t have been able to make it into the penthouse if it weren’t for the gentle motherly hand on his elbow the whole way up. The kind woman who tells him her name is Jack, she gets him a fluffy warm sweater and some pajama pants that he needs to roll up three times to make fit, and sets him up at the kitchen table with a bowl of hot soup and some tea, and sits with him while he eats. She asks him his name, where he’s from, just a gentle probing to get to know this kid she’s brought in. He tells her his name, and that he’s from Boston. When she gently asks if he’s worked for anyone else in the area he clears his throat and can’t look at her for a solid five minutes before he mumbles out a ‘yes’. Jack doesn’t pry, she never pries, he’ll come to learn, and he appreciates that. She just gives him a smile and, very gently and slowly, puts her hand on his shoulder, and gives it a tight squeeze, and tells him not to worry, that everyone in this house has a past they’d rather not talk about, and promises him that no one will ask after his past if he isn’t willing to come forth with it on his own. Once he’s finished eating she leads him to an empty room, tells him there’s a bathroom down the hall if we wants to shower, and pulls some clean sheets out of a linen closet and helps him make up the bed. She leaves him with a gentle goodnight another a fond smile. It’s the first time he’s ever gone to bed full.
In the following weeks he’s timid at first, ready for anything the other boys can throw at him, but not sure he’s ready for the intimacy of the household. He spends a lot of time in his room at first, the door cracked a little because the other boys keep coming to ask if he wants to play video games, or plan a heist or watch a movie with them. At first he declines, but that British Fucker with the beautiful smile eventually wins him over, so he comes out one night and sits on the couch with Gavin and Michael and Ray and watches a movie, and then another, and soon it’s four in the morning and he’s laughing along like he’s known them for years, at some point Gavin falls asleep on his shoulder and he couldn’t care less, because he’s mesmerized by how pretty he is when he’s not constantly squawking and making stupid bets. He carries Gavin to bed when they all decide to turn in, and Gav presses his stupid big nose into the crook of Jeremy’s neck and Jeremy blushes bright red whenever he sees Gav for almost a week after (Gav doesn’t tell him that he wasn’t actually asleep that night and did everything on purpose because he thought Jeremy was the cutest)
Jeremy who falls so easily into step with the others once he lets himself, who can sit for hours across from Ryan in their little makeshift library reading in companionable silence, who can go toe to toe in a fight with Michael and win at least 50% of the time, who will sit quietly on the floor of Ray’s bedroom playing the same DS games adjacent to each other, trading tips and tricks to get through this puzzle, or to catch that pokémon. Jeremy who shyly asks Gav on a date a few weeks after that movie night and gets a peck on the cheek and an enthusiastic yes to the proposition. Who helps Jack in the kitchen at breakfast every morning, and dinner every night just like he did with his own mom when they had the resources to do it, and who has helped Geoff plan half a hundred getaway routes just in case one gets blocked off during a heist.
Jeremy who never fit in anywhere finally finding the place he belongs in and the people he missed without even knowing they existed.
yeah so i wrote a quick christmas even and isak drabble even though it isnt christmas but i needed something to cheer me up so here is the final product
It came sudden during a midday Saturday during Christmas break while Isak and Even were lying in bed, cuddling, of course, scrolling through their phones when Even got a text from his mother -
“Christmas dinner tomorrow night - and I would love for darling Isak to come with you. Do you think he’ll mind? Let me know, love you.”
“Fy faen..” mumbled Even, dropping his phone onto his chest.
“What?” Isak asked, looking up at Even, raising an eyebrow.
“My mother just sent me a text..”
“She wants you to come along with me to Christmas dinner tomorrow night,” Even sighed, smiling lightly. “You wouldn’t mind tagging along, would you?”
Isak grins, beaming at his boyfriend as he jumps from their bed, “Are you kidding! I would love to! God, Christmas dinner with my boyfriend AND his parents, how perfect.”
“Well, my mom kind of adores you..”
“Who doesn’t?” Isak scoffs, laughing as Even rolls his eyes.
“So that’s a definite yes?” Even clarifies, getting up from the bed wrapping his arm around Isak’s waist. “I can just feel the excitement in your bones.”
Isak smiles, nodding. “I would love to,” he answers softly, pecking Even’s lips.
“Good. And where something nice, so I have something to distract myself during boring family conversations,” Isak blushes softly at the comment, and buries his face in his boyfriends chest, smiling. Even chuckles lightly, trying to coax Isak from his hiding phase that he’s recently inhabited and kisses his forehead as soon as Isak let’s his grip loose and starts heading to the kitchen. “Cheese toasties?” He asks sarcastically.
“Oh, God, please!” Isak replies, rolling his eyes, laughing, following Even into the kitchen.
The next night, Isak is struggling trying to find something to wear in his and Even’s small closet. He holds a balled up sweater in one hand and a t-shirt in the other, his upper body completely bare, frustration causing his eyebrows to crease. He finally gives up, throwing the garments on the floor, shouting for Even.
“Hm?” Even says as he enters the room, looking down at the small but growing pile of discarded clothes. “Let me guess.. you’re trying to find something to wear?”
Isak nodes, his fists balled up by his sides, his eyes continuously scanning the closet, “There’s nothing good enough in here for me!”
Even frowns, going over to stand by his boyfriends side, surveying the contents inside the closet as well. A few short moments pass until Even finally gets an idea. He reaches into the closet, pulling out the burgundy button up Isak wore last Christmas during the party in his old apartment.
“How about this lovely thing?” Even offers, holding it up to Isak as he takes it in. “You look so hot in button ups, I hope you know that. And I specifically said to dress in something to distract me and this will certainly do the trick. Isak blushes and rolls his eyes, taking the shirt from Even’s hands.
"Fine, I guess I’ll wear this with these black jeans.”
“Excellent. Mm..” Even mumbles, looking his boyfriend up and down and smirking as Isak pushes him lightly away, turning his back towards him as he slips the button up over his shoulders, quickly buttoning it up and he smiles, turning back to Even, raising his hands up at his sides as if to say ‘ta-da!’. Even smiles, pulling Isak into a quick embrace, pecking his cheek as they grab their coats, heading out into the bitter cold of the December evening, holding hands.
Upon arrival to Even’s mothers house, Isak is greeted warmly with a hug from Even’s mom and Even is greeted with a kiss on the cheek, his mother beaming at the two of them, still hand in hand and she seems to smirk a little as she turns to walk back into the kitchen and they both follow.
“How cute you two are together. And you even brought Isak! Ah, Even, you’re a sweetheart. The hand holding is a nice touch, too. So in love. And to conserve body heat. Genius.”
Even’s mother laughs, and Isak turns to his boyfriend and smiles, nudging him a little with his shoulder as Even rolls his eyes, but even he can’t help smiling.
“It’s nice to see you again, Mrs.Næsheim,” Isak says, smiling, still holding Even’s hand, almost as if he needs reassurance but Even just smiles at his boyfriend as he sees the dimples make an appearance.
“Ah, Isak, dear, you’re so lovely. Please, please sit. I just have to pull this pie out of the oven and then we can start dinner.” Isak and Even smile at each other, taking a seat next to one another at the table.
“You’re mom is so nice..” Isak whispers, eyeing all the steaming food placed before them on the table.
“Sometimes I feel as though she loves you more than she loves me,” Even laughs, kissing his boyfriend on the cheek. “I’m just kidding, no one could love you more than I do.” He says, placing his arm over Isak’s shoulders, lightly tugging at a small loose curl in his hair.
“Mm, is that so? Remember, she pays me to be your boyfriend.”
Even scoffs, smiling, “Oh, right, yeah.. is that how you manage to pay part of our rent?”
“Some of the time, yeah,” Isak agrees, laughing, looking at Even with his bright blue eyes just as his mother walks in with the steaming apple pie that Isak could just finish right now without a dinner.
“Mom, this looks really good. You really out did yourself this year,” Even says, still smiling as he watches Isak’s eyes trail over to where his mother put the apple pie. “Don’t worry, baby, you’ll get to eat the pie later.” Even jokes as Isak nods, his knee bouncing impatiently.
“All right. Shall we dig in?”
As soon as Isak unlocks their flat door, they both tumble in, the tired feeling gnawing away at them. It’s a little past eleven and as soon as they take off their shoes at the door, they both stumble into their bedroom, not even bothering to strip themselves of their day clothes, and immediately, Isak is clinging onto Even like he’s the only thing he has left, his sleepiness shown in his voice.
“That was such a nice dinner..” Isak mumbles into Even’s neck, listening to the small
rhythm of his heartbeat.
“Hmm,” Even replies, his eyes already closed, his arm wrapped protectively around Isak as they lay in bed together.
“We should do that more often,” Isak ponders, a small yawn escaping his lips.
“I hope you know how hard it was not to leave as soon as we got there because you looked so good in your outfit.”
“God, just shut up,” Isak says, burying his face into the pillow, but a smile still plays on his lips.
“Oh, I almost forgot. I have a Christmas present for you,” Even says, rolling on his side to the bedside table and he takes out a small bag from the drawer. “For you, baby.”
“You’re kidding, right?” Isak asks, as he too pulls a small bag from underneath the bed. “How odd.” Isak giggles, his eyes drooping a little as he and Even switch.
“You first,” Even insists, watching his boyfriend intently as he pulls the content from his bag.
“Oh, my god. Carribean Barbeque Jerk Spice? I can’t belive you..” Isak exclaims, laughing as he holds the spice container in his hand.
“Well, I noticed we didn’t have much in our spice cupboard, so there we go.”
“Well, its technically mine since you gave it to me as a present,” Isak says, placing the spice back into the goodie bag. “Okay, now your turn.”
As Even opens the bag, he feels as though he already knows what it is, but he was way wrong. It was not another container of spice they used on their cheese toasties, but a beautiful watch. “Isak!” He exclaims, happy but astounded at such a gift.
“What? You said you’ve always needed a watch so there. I got you a watch!”
“But- but- how much did this cost you? This must have costed so much! Fy faen!”
“It wasn’t, really. It was Jonas’ but he already has one like it so I asked if I could have it to give to you and he said sure, so I took the deal, so really it didn’t cost me anything.”
“Oh, my god, Isak I love it, thank you. You’re so perfect I love you,” Even says, putting the watch back into the safety of the bag and he places it on the floor next to the bed and grabs Isak and pulls him into a kiss. “You’re the best boyfriend ever and I don’t give a shit if my mom pays you.”
Isak laughs, kissing his boyfriend back eagerly, smiling, “Merry Christmas, Even,” he says, as he pulls him back down to lay back on the bed, closing his eyes and almost immediately falling asleep, but he gets the time to hear Even whisper in his ear softly:
“Foundations” Series: Part one, two, three (you’ll want to read these first if you want to get the universe we’re in)
Pairing: Lin-Manuel x Reader
Summary: Everything else in your lives may change, but Christmas will always be on December 25, and he will always want to spend it with you.
Note: This is 100% @letsgiggletogether‘s fault. BASICALLY we made a deal and to get her to write the super adorable fluffy thing she’s posting right now (it’s literally so beautiful i’m going to be crying about it for the rest of my life GO READ IT FIRST BECAUSE IT’S BETTER AND SO AMAZING) I had to agree to write this garbage. (lmao remember when I was done with the foundations-verse??? WE’RE BACK KIDS WATCH OUT IT’S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE)
ps this is somehow both a prequel and a sequel and i apologize
Word Count: 3,088
HAPPY HOLIDAYS, FRIENDS
Your family had always been something of a mess.
Sasha, you twin sister, was probably (definitely) the most put together of all of you. Your mother hadn’t been the same since your dad had passed away, and it had fallen to the two of you to make sure that she took care of herself. The holidays were particularly difficult to get through.
For the longest time, all any of you had was each other, three strong (if somewhat broken) women, trying to find joy in anything they could.
Your mom didn’t like December. Your dad had passed away in December.
She always collapsed into herself for the entire month, so you and Sasha would take on the responsibility of taking care of her. You always came home for the holidays, making sure she had food (Sasha’s job) and getting her out of the house (your job). It was a routine, a scheduled family rough-patch each and every year where you’d spend Christmas in her small apartment and try to pretend that you weren’t just trying to get through the goddamn day.
When Lin first came into your life, it all started changing.
i feel like writing some of my Kylo Ren, Rey, and general reylo headcanons bc why not? ^^
i see her being of Latinx origin - like whenever I picture her in my head, when i read fanfic or canon material, i always see someone who’s brown. she’s from Jakku, a desert planet that gets a lot of sun, so to me it just makes sense that she’s a brown woman (i really love the skin color that @lilithsaur gives her in their art so picture something very similiar to that)
if we’re talking about modern college AU’s, she would either be a horticulture, botany major OR an electrical or mechanical engineer - i just see her being really good with her hands, like that’s how she learns best which leads me to my next hc’s
REY LOVES PLANTS!!! like so much, she loves spring time the best because of how green everything looks, it’s so vibrant and beautiful to her. she loves growing her own vegetables and fruits in her own garden. her favorite flowers are daisies feeling the dirt in her hands and getting tired after a long day in the garden are some of Rey’s favorite things in the world
she also really enjoys machines - taking them apart, putting them back together, knowing all the components of a something so that she understands exactly how it works because she just really wants to know she’s a curious person, let her live
if she smoked weed, she would prefer strains that smell more earthy and skunky - Rey would love it more if her weed was a nice dark green color with orange hairs
not sure if she wants to get married, but she envisions herself settling down with a long time partner and raising a family together (she just doesn’t see the point in making the relationship anything “more” and spending extra money/credits on an event they don’t need if they clearly love each other)
i see her listening to fall out boy, but like take this to your grave and from under the cork tree era fall out boy - she’s a pop punk kid at heart with the style of really fashionable hipsters lol but you can still catch Rey wearing her old ratty checkered vans from when she got them 8 years ago fight her
Kylo now! c’:
so i see him having PTSD and also having depression and anxiety because of that
this is due to Snoke’s influence on him - i mean there’s a lot of evidence pointing that Snoke targeted and manipulated Kylo since he was a small child, and that leaves some type of effect on a person. i myself have PTSD and depression + anxiety because of abuse, so honestly i really see myself in Kylo :b
he smokes weed to help him manage his PTSD + depression + anxiety bc sometimes its too much and being high helps him keep his head above water - his favorite strains are sativas because they’re head highs and help him with his horrible headaches that he gets rather constantly
Kylo loves weed strains that are fruity and sweet (one of his all time favorite strains is blueberry)
in a modern college AU, he would definitely be some liberal arts major - i’m thinking probably a philosophy or psych or english major
if he’s a psych major, then he can’t even admit his own issue lmao like if something sounds similar when he’s studying he’ll be like “huh…weird” and then not dig any deeper because this boy is DENSE
if Kylo is a philosophy or english major then he’d be really pretentious and snobby. he would post quotes from random old or unknown philosophers or from some Byronic antihero literature that he loves so much but don’t worry bc Rey knocks his arrogant ass down a few pegs for being so snobby lol
i can also kinda see him being a polisci major? but i don’t see it too much tbh, this is just kinda something i can entertain, like maybe if it was an AU where Kylo never happened, so really it’d be Ben Solo Organa who’d be the polisci major
also Kylo’s name is actually Ben Solo Organa - he has both of his parents’ last names because that’s what Han and Leia wanted for their child(ren)
he would always keep his hair that length and he’d be clean shaven - he doesn’t really like facial hair and feels more attractive without it tho he can def pull off a nice beard should he decide to grow it out
his aesthetic is kinda punk/emo - he wears a lot of black, like pretty much his entire closet is black with very little color throughout. most of his color comes from his flannel (but even that has black on it, jfc Kylo chill with the motherfucking black). he wears doc martens, skinny jeans and some have rips in them, he likes v-necks a lot
Kylo’s a little shy/insecure about his nose and his height - he thinks he’s too big and tries shrinking into himself but it kinda draws more attention to himself lol poor guy
when his anxiety acts up, he has a habit of pinching at the skin on the top part of his wrist (this usually happens when he’s in therapy and talking about his issues and the things he’s done)
in a modern AU, the reason Kylo has PTSD is because Snoke abused him - sometimes i imagine it happening in a headmaster/student context, or sometimes it’s in a coach/athlete context. basically Snoke is in a position of power when Kylo is really vulnerable to him and abuses him and then uses his power over Kylo to make sure the abuse is kept secret until Kylo finally has had enough and tells someone maybe his mom? uncle? Rey? idk
i want them to settle down on Naboo, somewhere in the lake countries - i think Rey would love the green and the water and the tranquility of the planet; Kylo would enjoy how quiet and isolated the lake countries of Naboo are bc he doesn’t want to really deal with a lot of people after the war. they both want a quiet, peaceful life
who knows about children??? Rey would like some, and Kylo would too, but when they settle down together they don’t really feel a strong need to start a family. if it happens, that’s cool but if it doesn’t then that’s cool too
if they do have kids they would have 3 - a girl, a boy, and another girl (born in that order)
as far as canon goes, i’m gonna be totally fine if all we get is just Kylo and Rey having (the beginnings of) an empathetic, slightly compassionate relationship or understanding with each other
Rey absolutely adores Kylo’s hands. like she can’t get over how huge they are, especially compared to hers!!! she loves the feel of them cupping her cheeks, how they’re surprisingly soft (Kylo takes care of his skin, this boy LOVES BEING SOFT)
when they’re being naughty Kylo loves to squeeze Rey’s inner thighs - they’re nice and squishy and warm plus she enjoys it ;)
other naughty time things they do is Kylo absolutely loves it when Rey is on top and rides him - he loves when she becomes selfish and only thinks of her own orgasm (it really brings him closer when she’s just thinking of herself, don’t ask him why it just does)
Rey loves when Kylo applies soft pressure to her neck with his large hand
THEY BOTH LOVE NIPPLE PLAY in that Rey loves it when Kylo plays with her cute kinda big dark nipples and Kylo loves playing with them!!! in all types of ways (pinching, palming, biting, sucking, etc)
she steals his shirts/tunics/sweaters after they’re done having sex and likes to walk around their place in them - her butt sticks out a lil when she reaches up to get something so Rey likes to find any excuse to lift her arms to tease Kylo bc he loves her butt lmao
they’re a very sweet, quiet couple. not a lot of PDA besides hand holding and the occasional kiss which is usually initiated by Kylo so he really loves it and turns red when Rey randomly kisses him (either on the cheek or on the lips)
they like to spend time at home together (either inside or outside, depends on the weather), in the quiet, reading books or newspapers together