just kickers

Essays in Existentialism: Rivals

Clarke and Lexa are rival cheerleading captains with a little too much sexual tension. They both stay in the same hotel with their teams for a competition.

“I want absolutely no fraternization,” the coach said as he placed his hands on his hips and moved up and down the sidewalk in front of the hotel. “There will be no pranking, no fighting, no yelling, no touching, no post cards, no letters, no hugging, no anything, with the opposing team. Am I understood?”

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Today on Good Omens AUs no one asked for, Aziraphale and Crowley as the moon and sun incarnate.

Aziraphale with blonde curls as soft as moondust and skin that shimmers ever so faintly when light hits it just right.  Aziraphale with wide eyes like the moon and skin that almost unnaturally cool to the touch.  Aziraphale watching the sky wistfully and reading by starlight.

Crowley carrying the energy of a star inside his soul and streaks of light in his hair.  Crowley wearing sunglasses not to keep the light out, but to keep the light in.  Crowley, constantly moving, with skin warm like stones laying in the sun.  Crowley basking in light like it’s the only thing keeping him alive.

anonymous asked:

What is this sormik seduction thing is you talk about in your latest ask?? I.NEED.TO.KNOW 😍😍😍😍😍

What I was talking about is this pose that Mikleo pulls out three times in the space of less than 30 minutes of game time (assuming you know the puzzle to open the gate into the depths of Tintagel Ruins):

It’s kind of this super model-y pose that he does starting at that point in the game and then it pops up here and there later on (I distinctly remember seeing it a few times in either Lastonbell or Pendrago).  It’s not super obvious as anything overtly distracting or seductive, although he doesn’t use it much before this point in the game (if at all) … until you put him into an alternate costume, namely, his swimsuit (pretty sure the cat ears/collar/tail isn’t helping either lol):

(More screenshots plus some commentary behind the cut)

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mike pence used a private email account to conduct government business as governor. it just got hacked.

here’s the kicker though: IT WAS ON AOL

is “illegal AOL email account got hacked” not the most Baby Boomer shit you’ve read this week

Don’t you love it when bfs take fashion cues from each other? Sweater top. Check. Ripped jeans. Check. Boxer boots. Check. I see you Leeyum.

@lighthearted-liv @arellaroth @xissa-chanx @kiernaserea @oneofthree @accio-stark (I couldn’t agree more) @striving-artist @liljeconvallaria @dark-lord0012 @random-nexus @ndegenzuri @crystallized-iron @louserzouis @audre-w @lovelyirony @understandingthelyrics @valiantkittenwitch @ksziggy @thedaughterofsatan666-blog @mariesbookblog

I have heard your cries of anguish and I bring you part 2 of the Stuckony Given Name au!!!! Now probably changing to T’Stuckony most likely.

Tony is naturally mad, downright furious, after watching that coverage of Gregory, of his damn brother, being called Tony. The fucker took his name! He barely thinks twice about Steve and Bucky standing next to him, both looking uncomfortable and nothing like soulmates usually do when they announce they found each other to friends and family. No, Steve and Bucky had frowns but Tony didn’t care. He told himself he didn’t care. Sure it hurt to see the people that rejected him chose his brother over him, to stand by that idiot’s side instead of his, but right then the fury over his fucking brother taking his name overshadows that hurt.

He calls his mother to rant because if anyone would understand it was her. She listens, she tries her best to soothe, but the anger is still there. “I’m sorry, bambino. You know how your brother was. That boy always wanted to outdo you and Howard was no help, just allowing it. I don’t know when it happened. I’m sorry.”

And he knows she doesn’t, knows his mother would have never allowed it, but divorcing Howard and Howard gaining custody over Gregory didn’t allow her much right to anything over him.

So there was nothing they could do over Gregory taking Tony Stark as his own name, and ain’t that just a kicker. Living for years separated from Howard’s name meant the media eventually forgot about them. No one knew of Tony Carbonell, and if they did they didn’t care enough to cover it. Which was fine with Tony, it just sucked that ‘Tony Stark’ was always on the news after a questionable scene of debauchery instead of ‘Gregory Stark.’

Tony ignores it, because there’s nothing he can do. He continues to live life, ignoring the ‘Tony Stark’ here and ‘Tony Stark’ there and the ‘Relationship meant to be: Tony Stark talks about his relationship with his soulmates. Are they taking the next step?’

And because he’s not one to just let fate bring him down after giving it a huge middle finger and telling it “I give no more fucks” he pushes any and every mention of the ‘loving’ relationship. Besides, his anniversary was coming up and the last thing he should be thinking about is his rejecting soulmates. Instead his entire focus goes to his partner T’Challa. Someone who went through the same thing he did. Got rejected by his soulmate and was left to wonder if fate was playing a cruel prank on them. Tony wasn’t complaining. Far from it, otherwise T’Challa would have never looked his way. Whoever rejected this beautiful man clearly needed to get their head checked.

All the better for Tony.

Three years was a big step when it came to him so he was going to do everything right and push any thoughts of his brother far from his mind. They spend a lovely time together, going to one of Tony’s favorite places. Small, warm and comfortable with amazing food that T’Challa had learned to love as well. A ring may or may not be present and T’Challa kneeling and asking him a life-altering question might have happened. 

Neither of them noticed the lone man with a camera snap a picture of them. Tony may not be anyone to the public anymore but T’Challa was still a story. Rich, foreign, supplier that came from a line of very successful businessmen and who some consider a prince among his industry, next to take over the legacy.

The photo blows up among manufacturers and someone Tony thought would never return in his life manages to catch wind of it.

Weeks later, to Tony’s utter surprise, Howard pays his work a visit, asking to talk to him. Howard is skinny, gangly and sick. His days are numbered. Working with chemicals for his weapons had taken its toll. Time is against him and he makes it evident when he starts talking. There’s no ‘hello’ or ‘how have you been all these years?’ or even a ‘I’m sorry I was a shitty father and I know I’m too late but I have regrets and I need to get this off my chest.’ Nothing.

Tony is in absolute shock when Howard tells him “You’re wasting your potential working here. You could be doing much more if you’d have been disciplined. That fault lies with me. I shouldn’t have been so lenient. You’re mother didn’t help matters one bit.”

Tony was ready to chuck one of his tools at the man. He’s old, he can take him. Then the record scratches when Howard says “Come work for SI,” and yeah, no. Tony has lived life free of expectations and escaped living under Howard’s and Gregory’s shadows. No way was he going to willingly return to that personal hell again.

He tells Howard to get lost, to leave. He wants nothing to do with SI. Gregory can glorify it all on his own. He talks over Howard, refusing to listen to anything the man says as he orders him out his building. Howard is yelling, trying to command him, demanding respect, but Tony isn’t a little kid anymore and Howard stopped being his dad years ago.

Then Howard drops a bombshell by screaming “YOUR BROTHER IS RUINING STARK INDUSTRIES” and Tony stops mid rant.

“Come again?”

The old man grimaces. “Gregory is ruining SI. All my hard work. He’s making a mockery of my business. If I leave it to him he’s going to run it to the ground.

It isn’t hard to figure out what Howard was getting at. He wanted Tony to be there and keep Gregory in check. Make sure to do what he can to keep SI going. To hell with that. The man favored one child over the other. He can live with his choices. He tells him so. Goes back to kicking him out. “Make sure the door hits you on the way out.”

Howard does, slowly, finally accepting defeat, but then he puts his foot in his mouth by saying “Can you make a meeting between SI and WI (wakandan industries or something)? That boy of yours has pull. If I can talk to him,” and Tony sees red. Now he knows why Howard showed up in the first place. It wasn’t to get Tony to work for him, it wasn’t to try and form bonds, it was literally to make a partnership between Wakanda and SI. Howard saw a shortcut through Tony dating T’Challa.


Tony thinks that’s the last he’ll see of Howard, to hear about SI, but lo and behold sometime later after Howard’s funeral a message is sent to him. Howard’s will is being presented and Tony is required to attend. Tony rips the letter in anger. As he recalled Howard swore to take Tony and Maria off his will. There is no reason why Tony’s presence is required and he already had an idea why the letter was even sent. “Fucking Howard.”

Tony shows up fresh and ready to take names. He’s wearing a t-shirt and jeans because he could care less about the entire thing but the grip he has on T’Challa’s arm, his emotional support, says otherwise. He especially tightens it when he sees Gregory on the other side of the table they were meeting at and only keeps his eyes on his brother because Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes are there, too and if Tony catches their eyes he didn’t know what he’d do. Throw a chair out the window or something.

His only saving grace is T’Challa being there with him. And Jarvis also, who stands next to the old man that has Howard’s will in his bony hands. 

[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5/end]

bbq-sauce  asked:

I had a dream the other night that Torbjörn’s evil twin brother was trying to take over Watchpoint: Gibraltar and everyone had to stop him. 
Torb’s twin brother had long blue hair, 2 eyepatches (even though he didn’t need either, he was just edgy). But the kicker was probably that Torb’s twin was named Floorbjörn.



F l o o r b j ö r n I’M SCREAMING

Baby Bump Tag

fandom: Stony (Steve x Tony), Avengers,

summary: Tony is very pregnant and the baby is very active lately

length: 1 336 words

warning: mpreg!Tony

a/n: this prompt! hope you like it! the beginning is based on a scene from Friends (love that show!)


Baby Bump Tag

“I love you so very much.”

Clint made a face, trying to mute out his surroundings. Just focus on the game.

“I will play with you all the time.”

Focus on the game, Barton. The Earth won’t save itself from aliens, you know.

“You will be papa’s beloved little person in the whole world.”

“God!” okay, he couldn’t last any longer. The annoying cooing was beyond creepy. He turned his face to glare at the couple on the couch. “How can you allow him to talk to your dick like that?!”

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So I babysat for 8 hours today and came up with a headcanon with the help of @hpandtheprinter

  • James Potter is great with kids. 
  • He runs a babysitting thing during the summer holidays. 
  • Like this man has a small herd of children.
  • Sirius is no help when he runs away and lives with the Potters. He’s worse than the children, honestly.
  • And this all starts because James wants to impress Lily with how good he is with kids, this is like before 3rd or 4th year.
  • So he makes a shit ton of flyers and goes to the park and hands them out to the women who look tired, or just puts them up. 
  • Because some of the people are Muggles, he needs to learn muggle tech, another bonus towards impressing Evans if he says so himself. This boy gets his parents to install a phone in the shed, banning magic from the shed so phone doesn’t go crazy due to magic.
  • He has about 12 kids who are regulars.
  • Cheering charms and Pepper-Up Potions are his best friends
  • In 5th year a 6th year girl ends up in the duff, so he brings this to Hogwarts and actually ends up with quite a few kids.
  • He manages this, plus everything else. Eventually Peter and Remus find out. Peter laughs, Remus rolls his eyes.
  • After school he proposes the idea to the Order. This runs all the way up until the Potters go into hiding.
  • Lily finds out one day and in Em’s words: She comes home from something to all these children and at first she’s like ?!???. But then she sees James holding the smallest on his hip while he finishes up some snacks for the others and she just melts.
  • But here’s the kicker; James exclusively babysits the Weasley kids. By the time he’s out of school it’s his favorite thing. He’s constantly encouraging Bill, Charlie, and even Percy sometimes, to go for their dreams. He is a champ with Twins. They love him and quiet down right away for this man. Faster than with Molly. He introduces them to pranks and soon it’s him vs Charlie and Percy vs Gred and Forge. Charlie eventually decides he wants to obsess over dragons and so it’s Gred and Forge vs James and Percy. 
  • Then the Potters go into hiding in 1981 and the kids don’t see them for a few months and then there’s a funeral. Bill is trying not to cry, Charlie retreats to his dragons, Percy develops a hatred for pranks and rule breaking, the twins have no clue what’s going on. They’re only 4 years old and as they grow older they only vaguely remember a smiling man who played with them. 
  • “He had a nickname of some sorts something…” “Like Proddy?” “Nah, it doesn’t matter..” 
  • The name Prongs sounds familiar when they find the map but they don’t think anything of it.
  • Basically James Potter is the best man ever 
Basic equipment (apparently) optional

Fuck management. I work at a WaySub. On Saturday (7/1) our walk-in cooler - where we store ALL OUR FOOD STOCK - broke. We had to call the emergency maintenance line for over 2 hours before someone finally called back to let us know that no technicians were on call for the weekend, so no one could be in until Monday to fix it. We had to move all our food to the next closest store in our franchise (thankfully only about 15 minutes away). It made for a shitty weekend because we weren’t allowed to close while we waited for it to be fixed, but it was manageable. However,, it didn’t end there. As of today (7/5) the cooler STILL isn’t fixed. We haven’t closed even one day. We’re running out of food constantly. The only backup food we have is whatever we can run in from our sister store and cram in our backline cooler (which is about five feet long and can’t even hold one of every type of food we serve). Today we ran out of such basic sandwich necessities as turkey, ham, mayonnaise, tomatoes, and lettuce. It’s ridiculous and unacceptable that we haven’t gotten such a basic and necessary piece of equipment fixed in five days, and also ridiculous and unacceptable that they won’t let us close the restaurant down until we’re actually functional again. Might as well piss of all the customers and overwork all the employees (and no, we aren’t getting compensated for the gas it takes to drive between our stores constantly). ((We also had to throw out almost 30 pounds of just vegetables that were supposed to be “okay” sitting out without being refrigerated but were starting to grow mold because it’s been so long)).

The kicker? We just had a surprise store evaluation and we were marked for the cooler being at the wrong temperature.

TL;DR: our store no longer has the basic equipment necessary for our restaurant to function, but rather than shutting down until we can fix it, management has decided we should run out of all the product we serve, throw away 30 pounds of expired product, disappoint customers, and make additional stress and responsibilities for the workers that they aren’t fairly compensated for.

shoelessperson  asked:

OOQ, 12 please?

12. depressed

Oddly fitting for my current mentality, though I tried to instill as much hope and good feeling as I could there at the end to keep it from dragging too far. Apologies for the wait.

It’s a rare sunny day when Bond finds himself sitting in the single armchair in his flat, nursing a glass of something strong and feeling desperately sorry for himself.

M’s–Mallory’s–letter sits on the floor, discarded minutes or hours ago. Bond’s lost track of time, but he knows it has passed. The shadows on the floor have moved, and this is far from his first drink. He can see the smudges of his own fingerprints against the glass, right there next to the residue left by his lips all of the way around the rim.

He’s not at the bottom of the bottle–nowhere near, in fact–but he’s going to try to get there. He’s got nothing else to do. Nowhere else to go. His jacket’s still in a heap on the floor by the door, though he hasn’t managed to do more with his shirt than unbutton it a bit near the top. His belt’s too tight and he can feel his socks digging into his legs and christ, he just wants to stop feeling anything at all.

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ianto-is-not-dead  asked:

could you maybe do an angsty thing on how gil, harry and uma got together please??

Ohhhh, I do so love when I get to push the angst button. 

- So, it’s right after Uma’s returned to the Isle of the lost. She is soaked, miserable, and kinda lost. She never expected the compassion Ben offered. And it was tempting, but she could never leave her crew. She loves them too much (even if she doesn’t understand that). 

- So the crew is FAIRLY sure Uma’s coming back, but not 100% sure, so they decide to go out looking for her around the coasts and docks.

- Uma gets the idea that if she could use the necklace to grow as large as she did, maybe she can also use it to tear down the barrier now that she’s outside. It doesn’t work. She can make a hole big enough to get back inside, but she’d need a much more powerful magical artifact to bring the whole thing down, like the wand or her uncle’s trident, preferably the wand because it’s the thing that created the barrier and therefore the thing with the best chance of defusing it. And she’d kill for either of them, but there’s no way she’s getting near the wand any time soon after the cotillion and she doesn’t even know where Atlantica IS, never mind where her uncle would keep something like that, even if he let her in. So, reluctantly, she returns to the Isle and tries to pretend she’s not dead inside doing it. 

- Not surprisingly, Gil and Harry are the ones who find her. She’s sitting on the beach watching the yacht the cotillion is on and hating herself for failing to break the barrier. 

- Harry might have just left to let her have her space and think but Gil immediately called out to her and came up to see her so he didn’t get much choice. 

- Uma jumped up like a cornered animal and nearly knocked her self over getting caught in the obnoxiously long Auradonian dress. She caught herself though and then she had to break the obvious but bad news - her plan failed. 

- The boys kinda knew that already but man is that a bitter pill knowing that they’re going to be stuck on the Isle for the foreseeable future anyways, so they keep quiet until Gil asks what they do now. 

- Uma doesn’t want to go back to the crew just yet so they decide to sneak off the Jolly Roger and get her into dry clothes before she gets sick because wouldn’t that just be the kicker on this whole day? Sick in a place with spotty medicine.

- CJ ain’t here, so there’s no harm taking her clothes for Uma for a bit, and they just sit in Harry’s cabin for a while. Nobody’s sure what to say - the boys aren’t mad at Uma. It was a split second plan and it’s closer than they’ve ever gotten before, but that’s tricky to put into casual Isle-speak. So, instead, Harry asks what their next plan will be - for the barrier, for more territory, etc. It’s easier to reaffirm loyalty that way, by asking her for her plans and leadership and following her than it is to talk about feelings and reassure her. 

- That turned out to be the right call - Uma asks what her name is and they’re happy enough to answer. It’s a charged moment and then whoops, Uma’s hurled herself to kiss Harry and then Gil. They’re kinda surprised, but then she smirks and asks ‘Well?’  It’s hard to to turn down an offer like that from Uma so that’s how a throuple starts out. At first it looked like it was going to be a “V” relationship (boys are both with Uma, not each other) but Uma doesn’t really care if they’re dating each other too so, yeah, throuple. 

(Also, Uma’s fears of facing her crew turned out to be unfounded - they were ecstatic at how close they got and eager to perfect their next plan so it wouldn’t suffer from being off the cuff and they could actually get free and Uma got confirmation she has the best crew EVER.)

ughcharlie  asked:

So I work at the busiest location of an ice cream and burger chain that also has a grocery store and I'm dreading work next week because corporate has decided to, starting May 1st, reduce the size of the hamburger patties from 1/3lb. to 1/4lb. and I can already hear the complaints through the time-space continuum. They're also adding 2 combos to our menu, giving us 16 combos and the kicker? They just redid the menu in February 2016! Wish me and my coworkers luck?

In Defense of Elizabeth Midford

I love Lizzie, honestly, and I think she’s adorbs!

Sadly, she’s the most hated character in Black Butler.

Reasons for being hated: weak, annoying, annoying voice, gets in the way of Sebaciel



In this chapter, along with the Book of Atlantic movie, Lizzie was a HUGE ass kicker! I just wish Yana made her more like that. But then again, Victorian England was a sexist time period and women in England didn’t have many rights like they do now.

Annoying/ annoying voice

I think she’s ADORABLE! ESPECIALLY HER VOICE! And I DO watch this in English, since it makes more sense that people in England speak English and not Japanese. So basically, Cherami is one of my FAVORITE voice actresses out there! She’s amazing!

Gets in the way of Sebaciel

Seriously?! Why hate ANY character over your fucking ships?! And Sebaciel can’t be canon because in the time period, if Ciel were gay, he’d be in some sort of mental hospital, since Victorians were EXTREMELY homophobic and thought being gay was a disease.

In conclusion, I don’t think Lizzie is a bad character. I think she’s a well written character and she needs more love and less hate! Thank you!

A Foolproof Plan

Rating: G -T; for comic mischief.

Pairing: EreAni, Eren x Annie. Hints of other pairings.

Summary: How would Annie Leonhart ask her date to the Sadie Hawkin’s Dance? Here’s how! (No guarantees that it will all go smoothly… especially when your friends are idiots.)

Word Count: 1678

A/N: I love the RBA trio. Btw, this is slightly crack lol. That is all.

“Have you asked anyone to Sadies yet?”

If Annie Leonhart had to hear that question one more time…

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tweetybird53  asked:

Headcannons for the paladins +Allura and Coran 's favorite sleeping positions (no nsfw, just fluff)


  • After all the training at the Galaxy Garrison, Shiro’s accustom to sleeping on his back as straight as a plank. When he get’s nightmares though, he starts shaking a little bit and his head turns slightly from side to side.
  • If he sleeps with his s/o next to them, he’d put their head on his sholder and wrap an arm around their shoulder with the other reaching over to hold their hand.


  • Keith is a side sleeper, and shifts sides occasionally in his sleep, but he remains mostly still otherwise.
  • With an s/o, he hug their waist and buries his face in the crook of their neck.


  • Lance lays on his back in his sleep because he wears face masks a lot, but his limbs are just everywhere. He’s a kicker too.
  • His s/o would have to hold onto him if they wanted to sleep with him to avoid being kicked out of bed.


  • Hunk is another back sleeper, but he rolls onto his sides from time to time in his sleep.
  • He’s a huge blanket hog, and his s/o would have to bring their own sheets (he still might unconciously steal them even then), but Hunk also hugs his s/o in his sleep a lot.


  • “Sleep is for the weak and those without internet.” doesn’t get nearly as much sleep as they should, and usually passes out while working, so they can sleep almost anywhere. When they actually lay down to sleep, though, they’re a side sleeper and doesn’t move much.
  • With an s/o, they’d keep a little distance between them just because they’re afraid any movement from one will wake the other up, but likes to hold their s/o’s hand while they sleep.


  • Allura is a side sleeper and doesn’t usually move too much other than shifting a little to get more comfortable.
  • With an s/o, she’d really like cuddling with them while they slept and they usually wake up in each others arms.


  • Dear god, this man tosses and turns in his sleep a lot. You can tell what he’s dreaming about from his movements and little bunches of sleep talking.
  • His s/o would have to be a super heavy sleeper, because there’s a lot of punching, kicking and “hit you with… HA HA HA HA!” followed by sudden super tight hugs.

- Admin A