just don't even ask i don't have a problem i'm totally ok

anonymous asked:

Ah I don't mean to bother you but do you have any advice on how to deal with depression I'm sorry for bothering you I just don't know what to do

 Hey, it’s ok yeah you can totally ask me. I’m probably not the best person to go to because I’m not a therapist or whatever, but I definitely have experience with dealing with Depression so, I’ll tell what you helped me. and hope that maybe it helps you in some way shape or form. 

So when I was in this abusive relationship with my ex, I hit total rock bottom and I have never been so low in my entire life. Honestly if you met me now, and then met me like 2 years ago, you literally would be talking to two different people it was so bad. but I don’t need to go into detail or describe depression. I’m sure you already know what it is very very well. 

So, the killer about Depression is that you feel empty, sad, angry, etc etc, and it’s kills all motivation and drive and inspiration to do the things that you once enjoyed ya know? like, you no longer enjoy doing whatever your hobbies were, and you have no interest in doing them anymore. Depression tells you that you want to is sleep, eat/not eat, sit and stare at nothing, do nothing, not talk to friends or family. And because Depression is so strong, it’s easy to fall into doing those things of just not doing anything, and isolate yourself from any form of social interaction with friends and family etc. And a lot of the time you feel like that’s all you can do, like you don’t have the literal energy to do anything else such as something as simple as getting up out of bed after sleeping in over 10 hours or something. (it’s not laziness, it’s depression.) 

Well those things that Depression makes you want to do, is the exact opposite of what you should do. And those things Depression says you hate and don’t want to do, – all those hobbies, or getting up and taking a walk, talking to friends, doing something, is exactly what you need to do, to help you with your depression. The best medicine I find is distractions, and not letting it control you. It’s tough, especially emotionally, and you’re gonna hate it for a really long time, but eventually doing all those things you useto like, and now hate, the likeness to it starts to come back. but it’s easier said than done, and it takes a LOT OF WORK! and it’s hard. but you can do it! 

Trying to find some kind of reason or obligation helps too. like what really got me on the stepping stones of doing better is I got this Indie game job, and I was given the like impossible task to make over 100 little paintings (all the custom artwork) in 3 and a half weeks, high quantity, in high quality. It forced me to paint and draw even though I had like no interest in art because of the major depression I was feeling, and that job forced me to draw 8 to sometimes 15 hours a day. It was brutal, and for a bit I hated having to draw so much cuz I didn’t really enjoy art, but then forcing myself to get up and do something I hate (but once loved) I started to like it again. And then when the Indie game ended, I wanted to keep pushing myself to improve and have a reason to keep me drawing, which is why I started Youtube. And it really helped me build my confidence and fight against the depression. 

Now the thing is, Depression never goes away, it’s a mental illness and it’s not something you can get rid of like a virus or bacteria. BUT FEAR NOT! just hear me out!  It’s a constant battle everyday. You can’t be cured, and no amount of therapy or med can change that. Don’t fall into the misconception that meds/therapy fixes the issues, because it doesn’t. It is HELP. and Help isn’t fixing, it is assistance for YOU to fix things. So getting medical or therapeutic help is definitely good and I promote it, but you can’t rely on it to fix your problems, because it has to be you to put forth the initiative, which is why I told you what I did above first. Meds and therapy try to regulate your hormones and work out solutions for you to deal with the issues in yourself and your environment so you can work out your depression. so the goal in getting better isn’t to find a cure, even still to this day I struggle with it a lot, and I have my moments and my episodes sometimes. BUT I’m not saying you’re going to be miserable for the rest of your life, because the truth is, you can be happy, while having depression. 

The goal is to learn how to maintain and live with it, so you aren’t controlled by it. I have control over my depression right now, and despite that it’s still always there in the back of my mind and it resurfaces sometimes, I’m actually very happy and have become a pretty stable person. (especially compared to who I use to be) 

So start by forcing yourself to get up, doing small things, try to seek out interests that distract you from depression, but also force yourself to fulfill responsibilities (work, school, chores, etc) which helps you get stronger and start gaining control of the depression. Seriously something I find very helpful is going on a walk. It’s easy to just slump around or sleep in bed and never get up, but walking, (that thing that you don’t want to do) actually helps a lot, and there’s a scientific reason for it too, not just it sounding nice. But the more you can do for yourself, and others even, the better you’ll feel, even if it doesn’t seem that way or a long time. It takes a lot of time to crawl out of the rut you’re in, but you’ll get the if you just keep going. 

I know I don’t give the best advice, but, I hope this helps in some way. 

Mean Girls Starters
  • ❝If you're from Africa, why are you white?❞
  • ❝Oh my God, [name], you can't just ask people why they're white.❞
  • ❝Boo, you whore!❞
  • ❝Nice wig, [name]. What's it made of?❞
  • ❝Your Mom's chest hair!❞
  • ❝On Wednesdays we wear pink!❞
  • ❝Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. And ruining [name]'s life definitely didn't make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you.❞
  • ❝Hey, buddy, you're not pretending anymore. You're plastic. Cold, shiny, hard plastic.❞
  • ❝You know what! It's not my fault you're like, in love with me, or something!❞
  • ❝See? That's the thing with you plastics. You think everybody is in love with you when actually, everybody HATES you! Like, [name], for example, he broke up with Regina and guess what? He still doesn't want you! So why are you still messing with [name], [name]? I'll tell you why, because you are a mean girl! You're a bitch! Here. You can have this. It won a prize.❞
  • ❝And I want my pink shirt back! I want my pink shirt back!❞
  • ❝That is so fetch!❞
  • ❝Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen!❞
  • ❝God! I am so sorry [name]. Really, I don't know why I did this. I guess it's probably because I've got a big lesbian crush on you! Suck on that! AY-YI-YI-YI-YI-YI!❞
  • ❝[Name], I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Nobles. And I'm sorry for telling everyone about it. And I'm sorry for repeating it now.❞
  • ❝And none for [name], bye!❞
  • ❝Get in loser, we're going shopping.❞
  • ❝Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die! Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers.❞
  • ❝I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school... I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy...❞
  • ❝She doesn't even go here!❞
  • ❝Raise your hand if you have ever been personally victimized by Regina George?❞
  • ❝I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.❞
  • ❝I hear she does car commercials... in Japan.❞
  • ❝Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.❞
  • ❝One time she met John Stamos on a plane... And he told her she was pretty.❞
  • ❝One time she punched me in the face... it was awesome.❞
  • ❝Why are you eating a Kalteen bar?❞
  • ❝Man, I hate those things. Coach Carr makes us eat those when we want to move up a weight class.❞
  • ❝Why should Caesar just get to stomp around like a giant while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar, right? Brutus is just as smart as Caesar, people totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar, and when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody because that's not what Rome is about! We should totally just STAB CAESAR!❞
  • ❝[Name] had cracked.❞
  • ❝Hell, no. I did *not* leave the South Side for this!❞
  • ❝Somebody wrote in that book that I'm lying about being a virgin, 'cause I use super-jumbo tampons, but I can't help it if I've got a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina!❞
  • ❝There's a 30% chance that it's already raining!❞
  • ❝I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me... but I can't help it that I'm so popular.❞
  • ❝I gave him everything! I was half a virgin when I met him.❞
  • ❝Do you wanna do something fun? Wanna go to taco bell?❞
  • ❝I can't go to taco bell, I'm on an all-carb diet. GOD [name] you're so stupid!❞
  • ❝It's like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it's going to rain.❞
  • ❝That is the ugliest f-ing skirt I've ever seen.❞
  • ❝She's totally rich because her dad invented Toaster Streudels.❞
  • ❝That's why her hair is so big, it's full of secrets.❞
  • ❝She's the queen bee - the star, those other two are just her little workers.❞
  • ❝And they have this book, this burn book, where they write mean things about all the girls in our grade.❞
  • ❝Oh my God - Danny DeVito! I love your work!❞
  • ❝At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia... and die.❞
  • ❝Is butter a carb?❞
  • ❝You can't sit with us!❞
  • ❝Fine! You can walk home, bitches.❞
  • ❝And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals.❞
  • ❝My grandma takes her wig off when she's drunk.❞
  • ❝I love her. She's like a Martian!❞
  • ❝Are they not suppose to be let out when they're grounded?❞
  • ❝She thinks she's gonna have a party and not invite me? Who does she think she is?❞
  • ❝I like invented her, you know what I mean?❞
  • ❝I just want you to know, if you ever need anything, don't be shy, OK? There are NO rules in the house. I'm not like a regular mom, I'm a cool mom.❞
  • ❝Can I get you guys anything? Some snacks? A condom? Let me know! Oh, God love ya.❞
  • ❝Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.❞
  • ❝Sorry, we only carry sizes 1, 3, and 5. You could try Sears.❞
  • ❝Regina George is not sweet! She's a scum-sucking road whore, she ruined my life!❞
  • ❝I know it may look like I was being like a bitch, but that's only because I was acting like a bitch.❞
  • ❝Your face smells like peppermint!❞
  • ❝Oh, you'll get socialized all right, a little slice like you.❞
  • ❝You're a regulation hottie.❞
  • ❝We do not have a clique problem at this school.❞
  • ❝But you do have to watch out for "frenemies".❞
  • ❝I know she's kind of socially retarded and weird, but she's my friend... so, just promise me you won't make fun of her!❞
  • ❝Half the people in this room are mad at me, and the other half only like me because they think I pushed somebody in front a bus, so that's not good.❞
  • ❝I don't hate you cuz yo' fat... yo' fat cuz I hate you!❞
  • ❝You smell like a baby prostitute.❞
  • ❝Is your muffin buttered?❞
  • ❝Jason, you do not come to a party at my house with Gretchen and then scam on some poor innocent girl right in front of us three days later. She's not interested. Do you want to have sex with him?❞
  • ❝Good. So it's settled. So you can go shave your back now. Bye, Jason.❞
  • ❝Finally, Girl World was at peace.❞
  • ❝Hey, check it out. Junior Plastics.❞
  • ❝Damn, Africa, what happened?❞
  • ❝I saw [name] wearing army pants and flip flops, so I bought army pants and flip flops.❞
  • ❝Oh, hi. Did you wanna buy some drugs?❞
  • ❝Make sure you check out her mom's boob job. They're hard as rocks.❞
  • ❝Whatever, I'm getting cheese fries.❞
  • ❝Okay, I'm going to forgive you because I'm a very Zen person... and I'm on a lot of pain medication right now.❞
  • ❝Can you believe my f-ing mom is here?❞
  • ❝I have this theory, that if you cut off all her hair she'd look like a British man.❞
  • ❝I care. Every year the seniors through this dance for the underclassmen called the Spring Fling. And whosoever is elected King and Queen automatically become head of the Student Activities Committee and since I am an active member of the Student Activities Committee, I would safely say, I care.❞
  • ❝Irregardless, ex-boyfriends are just off limits to friends. I mean that's just like the rules of feminism.❞
  • ❝Did your teacher ever try to sell you marijuana or ecstasy tablets?❞
  • ❝What are marijuana tablets?❞
  • ❝You cannot do that. That is social suicide. Damn! You are so lucky you have us to guide you.❞
  • ❝Oh, I love seeing teachers outside of school. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs.❞
  • ❝Everyone in Africa knows Swedish.❞
  • ❝Made out with a hot dog? Oh my God that was one time!❞
  • ❝I know having a boyfriend might seem like the only thing important to you right now, but you don't have to dumb yourself down in order for a guy to like you.❞
  • ❝Come on! We could publish it and then everybody would see what an ax-wound she really is!❞
  • ❝And you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week, so I guess you chose today.❞
  • ❝She's not even that good looking if you really look at her.❞
  • ❝I don't know, now that she's getting fatter she's got pretty big jugs.❞
  • ❝Watch out please! Fresh meat coming through!❞
  • ❝I'd rather see you out there shakin' that thang.❞
  • ❝You can do this. There's nothing to break your focus, because not one of those Marymount boys is cute.❞
  • ❝There are two kinds of evil people in this world. Those who do evil stuff and those who see evil stuff being done and don't try to stop it.❞
  • ❝Well, I mean you wouldn't buy a skirt without asking your friends first if it looks good on you.❞
  • ❝The limit does not exist!❞
  • ❝I just wanted to say that you're all winners. And that I couldn't be happier the school year is ending.❞
  • ❝It's called the South Beach Fat Flush and all you drink is cranberry juice for 72 hours.❞
  • ❝She's fabulous, but she's evil.❞
  • ❝So, are you gonna send any candy canes?❞
  • ❝No. I don't send them, I just get them. So you better send me one, byotch.❞
  • ❝'Cause she's a life ruiner. She ruins people's lives.❞
  • ❝Oh no, I can't say anything else until I have a parent or lawyer present.❞
  • ❝Did you see nipple? It only counts if you saw a nipple!❞
  • ❝Oh, no. It was coming up again, word vomit... no, wait a minute... Actual vomit.❞
  • ❝Grool... I meant to say cool and then I started to say great.❞
  • ❝I'm a cool mom! Right Regina?❞
  • ❝Good news, they didn't get run over... Bad news, they're still flat.❞
  • ❝Hey, hey, hey. How are my best girlfriends?❞
  • ❝Oh god, busted! Just start apologizing and crying. No, play it cool.❞
  • ❝I mean no offense, but how could she send you a candy cane? She doesn't even like you that much. Maybe she feels weird around me because I'm the only person who knows about her nose job. Oh my god, pretend you didn't hear that.❞
aqours group chat 2
  • kanan: okay guys one of you needs to front up
  • kanan: somebody left some really saucy underwear at mari's house. it's not mine, it's not mari's and it's not dia's. whose is it.
  • chika: oh my god
  • you: are u sure it's not mari's
  • you: bc im p sure nobody wears that shit other than mari
  • kanan: i would have thought so too but hey im not here to judge what u wear
  • kanan: i washed it already. whose it is
  • chika: i bet it's yoshiko's
  • yoshiko: FUCK OFF IT IS
  • chika: hahahahahahahhaa
  • yoshiko: im 15 fuck u
  • chika: you wear all kinds of weird shit i wouldn't be surprised
  • maru: nNAHH G HJSUTI SH HEN HERFM POIRM IWESE
  • yoshiko: oh boy
  • ruby: "nah it's not hers, i promise"
  • you: why does maru know the contents of yoshiko's underwear drawer
  • yoshiko: she does my washing
  • you: what
  • chika: what
  • mari: what
  • kanan: what]
  • yoshiko: uh yeah
  • kanan: why
  • yoshiko: my washing machine is broken
  • kanan: isn't there a laundromat at numazu's
  • yoshiko: ....no
  • you: bro why didn't u ask me
  • you: i live literally down the street from u
  • yoshiko: uh
  • yoshiko: ur scary
  • you: this coming from the hellspawn herself
  • chika: get dragged you
  • you: fuck u tbh
  • chika: hahhahaha
  • kanan: okay but seriously whose is it
  • chika: where the hell are dia and mari
  • dia: I'm here.
  • chika: ok cool wheres mari
  • you: actually wheres minidia
  • chika: omg
  • yoshiko: please don't tell me
  • dia: No.
  • chika: denial
  • dia: No.
  • kanan: i mean she is the only one who hasn't responded
  • dia: No.
  • mari: ┐(・。・┐) ♪
  • you: uh yeah what mari said
  • you: sorry dia ur sister's a ho
  • dia: .
  • kanan: rip you
  • chika: rip you
  • mari: rip you
  • you: shit
  • you: hahahhaha
  • you: u know im kidding right dia
  • chika: lmao
  • you: dia
  • mari: omg
  • kanan: she's gone
  • you: oh shit
  • you: oh fuck
  • you: yoshiko unlock your door im coming over
  • yoshiko: fuck off u r
  • yoshiko: don't drag me into ur problems
  • you: nooooooooo
  • you: fuck its midnight i can't go out my parents will kill me
  • you: shit
  • you: SHIT
  • mari: ᕙᓄ(☉ਊ☉)ᓄᕗ
  • chika: ᕙᓄ(☉ਊ☉)ᓄᕗ
  • kanan: anyways moving back to the topic of saucy underwear, i guess it's ruby's?
  • chika: where tf is she anyway
  • yoshiko: well maybe dia could tell us if you hadn't run her damn mouth
  • you: FUCK OFF IM ACTUALLY SO SCARED
  • kanan: im sure u won't die
  • kanan: probably
  • mari: idk her nails are pretty long
  • mari: shit huuuuuurt last night
  • kanan: tru that
  • mari: she said she was gonna cut them later tonight but lmao
  • kanan: thank god tbh it's actually so uncomfortable when she's trying to
  • mari: fuck yeah
  • yoshiko: oh my god
  • yoshiko: do you guys ever shut up about banging each other
  • mari: we're teenagers it's normal
  • yoshiko: no no it isn't
  • chika: maybe ur just jealous bc u haven't got two gfs yoshiko
  • you: haha yeah yoshiko
  • yoshiko: ur the one who's about to eat those nails watanabe
  • you: .
  • maru: nOT URY BYN
  • yoshiko: ruby?
  • chika: rubyyyyyyyyyyy
  • yoshiko: pls translate
  • chika: where tf is she
  • ruby: okay sorry i uh
  • ruby: i have a confession
  • kanan: oh boy here it is
  • mari: ᕙ༼=ݓ益ݓ=༽ᕗ
  • chika: ୧( ಠ┏ل͜┓ಠ )୨
  • kanan: where's the confession
  • chika: i can't believe she gapped it again
  • kanan: unbelievable
  • ruby: the underwear isn't mine
  • ruby: it's riko's
  • riko: TRAITOR
  • chika: holy fucking shit
  • riko: BETRAYAL
  • kanan: oh my god
  • maru: caLled it5th
  • ruby: "called it"
  • riko: TRAITOR
  • ruby: im sorry ok but i was gettign slandered
  • riko: UNBELIEVEABLE
  • [riko has left the group]
  • chika: holy shit
  • chika: that's kinda hot
  • kanan: chika ur far too young for this
  • chika: im literally 1 year younger than u binch
  • kanan: ur like 12
  • chika: fuck off uncle dad
  • kanan: what
  • mari: (ʘᗩʘ’)
  • mari: u've been promoted to uncle kanan how does it feel
  • chika: dw mari ur the aunt
  • mari: fuck yeha i am
  • mari: im the cool aunt B)
  • kanan: where's you
  • chika: oh no
  • chika: YOUCHAN IM SORRY
  • chika: IT WAS I WHO WHO ATE UR PUDDING LAST NIGHT
  • chika: SORRY NOT SORRY ASSHOLE
  • chika: i hope u don't die
  • yoshiko: what a friend
  • kanan: :')
  • kanan: brings a tear to my eye
  • you: Hello.
  • you: This is Dia.
  • chika: holy fucking shit
  • you: Here's a photo of the current situation.
  • [you has sent a picture]
  • chika: WASTED
  • kanan: oh my god that's tragic
  • mari: (́ง◉◞౪◟◉‵)ง
  • yoshiko: yikes
  • you: If any of you deign to insult my sister with such impure insults again, I can assure you the same fate.
  • chika: i'd do it for the vine tbh
  • kanan: chika no
  • mari: same
  • yoshiko: same tbh
  • kanan: why the fuck
  • chika: u gotta
  • mari: u gotta
  • yoshiko: u gotta
  • ruby: u gotta
  • maru: u GO T A
  • yoshiko: hey nice job that was almost coherent maru
  • maru: :o)
  • you: I'll be returning the phone to You now.
  • chika: take it with u tbh
  • chika: shut the bitch up
  • kanan: chika oh my god
  • chika: she's been meming on me all day leaf me olone
  • yoshiko: true u got fucking destroyd earlier
  • mari: (ᕗ ͠° ਊ ͠° )ᕗ
  • yoshiko: yeah that
  • you: fuck y'all tbh
  • chika: she lives
  • kanan: welcome back from the dead
  • mari: something else also rises
  • yoshiko: woah
  • chika: woah
  • you: woah
  • kanan: uh
  • kanan: babe u ok
  • mari: pls come over im lonely :(
  • yoshiko: not this shit again
  • yoshiko: u have a dm fucking use it
  • kanan: but that's no fun
  • mari: how will we keep dia in on the saucy goodness if we don't put it in mainchat
  • yoshiko: disgusting
  • mari: maybe ur just sexually frustrated hun
  • yoshiko: shut
  • chika: she totally is
  • you: absolutely
  • yoshiko: leave me tf alone
  • chika: i bet it's maru
  • yoshiko: fuck off
  • you: nice
  • kanan: ;0 !! our baby has a crush
  • mari: d'awwwwwh
  • yoshiko: i do not
  • mari: sounds like denial uwu
  • yoshiko: is the concept of fuck off difficult for u to understand
  • chika: lmaooo
  • you: just ask her out bro
  • yoshiko: why tf would i do that
  • maru: :o(
  • yoshiko: fuck wait maru no
  • chika: hahhahahahahahahahaha
  • yoshiko: fuck y'all
  • maru: ny'all
  • chika: ny'all
  • you: ny'all
  • mari: ny'all
  • kanan: ny'all
  • yoshiko: disgusting
  • maru: :o(
  • chika: wow yoshiko leave ur gf alone
  • you: yeah yoshiko leave ur gf alone
  • yoshiko: we're not even fucking dating
  • maru: :o(
  • yoshiko: STOP SENDING SAD EMOJIS UR MAKING IT WORSE
  • ruby: she's startign to cry yoshiko chill out
  • yoshiko: what no iu
  • yoshiko: no don't cry im sorry
  • yoshiko: im sorry....they're just.....teasing me and i got mad
  • yoshiko: i do really like you !! i just....i dunno......
  • maru: :o)
  • yoshiko: c:
  • mari: can you take your gross ass domestic problems out of mainchat thanks
  • kanan: can you take your gross ass domestic problems out of mainchat thanks
  • chika: can you take your gross ass domestic problems out of mainchat thanks
  • you: can you take your gross ass domestic problems out of mainchat thanks
  • ruby: can you take your gross ass domestic problems out of mainchat thanks
  • yoshiko: i'm gonna commit a fucking murder
  • yoshiko: five of them, actually
  • maru: :o(
  • yoshiko: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
  • [yoshiko has left the group]

anonymous asked:

Oh no. I didn't mean that. Like. Ok. I don't want to be anything other than straight. Not because I have a problem with the LGBT community but like, y'all face so much prejudice and shit and it's horrible and I guess I'm selfish and just don't want to have to deal with that? I know that probably makes me a bitch but like I fully support you all, I just open I'm not. I'm not sure if I'm explaining this well enough. Also it's totally fine she's Trans. She's a woman. No question.(More on next ask)

I just don’t understand why I’d find her attractive (I still definitely do?) but not other women? I’ve read about fetishization of transgender people and I don’t think that’s it? Like I could care less about her genitals for example. I just thought she was cute? I don’t really know what I’m asking anymore. I’m just so confused :(

Also I checked out the Chloe person you asked? Is it just me or do they not look Transgender? Like they look like a super cute boy but I don’t know I don’t see them as a girl? All the transgender girls I see on tumblr are super cute and pretty and I don’t know.I’m rambling now. (3/3)

Okay literally everything you just said is so fucking problematic I don’t even know where to start. You don’t WANT to be anything other than straight because it’s hard? Well, golly! I’ll just choose to be straight then. Somehow you made this so much worse by saying all these things. Wow.

Also you’re an asshole??? You don’t say shit like that about trans people. She is a WOMAN. Say it with me. WOMAN. She is a girl whether you want to fucking say it or not? And she’s fucking awesome, you sick son of a bitch.

What is wrong with you? People’s gender identities are not up for debate? Do you have any idea how much suffering I have seen my trans friends go through because of how much the world hates them? How their right to exist in public places like bathrooms is a hot topic because of people like you? You seriously need to think before you spew this level of ignorance. I’m appalled.

Everyone please join me in dragging this person and possibly educating them too but I’m shaking with anger and can’t be nice right now. Wow.

“I’m selfish I guess and don’t want to be oppressed. But I don’t have anything against y'all.” Wow. No. You just have some intense internalized homophobia and if you can’t realize that, I’m not fucking with this lol.

anonymous asked:

Hi! I was wondering, you don't have to do this if you don't want to or if you're too busy or whatever, if you have any tips on doing french characters? I'm thinking of putting a french character in my book and was wondering about maybe some stuff about english/american that's weird to you or something just like, about the french people? Again, you can totally ignore this if you're uncomfortable or if you don't have time, I know you're a busy gal. It would just be super great if you could ^.^

Hi anon ^^

It’s a tricky question because French people can be very different according to the place they live, their social or ethnic background, their education or just because of the fact that we are all different but I’m gonna try to tell you about “general trends” and our relationship with Americans. Here is a (certainly incomplete) list, in no particular order.

- French people have a pretty “dry” and dark sense of humor. If they are a bit “mean” to you, it means that they like you and that you are a part of their circle. Think South Park, Georges Carlin, Chris Rock and even for some people, Jimmy Carr. Also, all the “white guuurls” jokes don’t  make any sense to us. It doesn’t mean that we don’t joke about racial stuff but it’s different. So yeah, we are often pretty violent verbally, but it doesn’t mean we are angry. It can be a bit baffling for foreigners because they don’t know when we are joking or when we are really angry.

- We don’t have the same racial stereotypes. For instance, this racist cliché about black people liking watermelon or chicken is beyond understanding for a French. I remember this hilarious French forum thread about Mary J. Blige being called out because she was in that Burger King commercial 4-5 years ago. People were outraged and didn’t understand why it was such a problem. “If this damn woman wants to be in a commercial, it’s her problem!” - “I don’t understand. Is it because she’s a rap artist and it’s not good for her image?” - “Are vegans not happy or something?”. And it’s finally after the 50th comment that someone explained that the association “chicken/black people” could be seen as racist in the USA and the whooole thread went O____o

- Ok, sorry about that one but….the American “PC culture”. It doesn’t mean that in France everything is allowed or that we are not offended by precise topics, it means that we often have the impression that American are offended by the tiniest things. Whether it’s objectively true or false doesn’t matter: it’s the general impression that we have. For instance, in political debate shows in France, when someone is easily offended, you can be sure that at a  moment or another you are gonna have a “We are not in the USA” (or more recently “We are not in Sweden” - Sorry Sweden :S) from one of the participants.

- No, we don’t hate Americans for fuck’s sake. Ok, sometimes, we tend to see Americans as a bit arrogant (but we see ourselves as fucking arrogant too, don’t worry) but we have for instance nothing against American tourists. We also have a great respect for WW2 veterans:

(US army veteran Jack Schlegel, 91 y.o at the time, in front of the street named after him.)

- Everything is the government’s fault and the government should do something about it (whatever the problem of the moment is)…but on the other hand, it shouldn’t interfere too much either. xD

- French people have no problem finding ways to get around the law when they judge the law is restricting their everyday life and that “we can’t do anything anymore in this fucking country”. Simple example. Before, in cafés and restaurants, you had a smoking and a non-smoking area. It stopped when an anti-smoking law was voted and that all the bars, cafés and restaurants had to become 100% non-smoking. Do you know what happened? The shop owners installed heating devices in the restaurant terraces to give people the possibility to smoke outside and then, they closed the terraces with some sort of plastic wraps. You are outside and inside at the same time. Inside because you are hot and you can eat like in a normal restaurant but outside in regard of the French law.

- We love to complain, we are big mouths. That’s our way of communicating. For instance, this is how French illustrator Uderzo sees us (and it’s also one of the most famous gags in French comics: A fight that starts because of the bad smell of the fish shop. You have one in every volume of Astérix)

- We are a bit pessimistic. We are individualistic (you can see it in the way people act toward each other in the streets, they don’t care about other) but we see the ideas of solidarity and fraternity as important (don’t fucking touch to the NHS). It’s a fucking contradiction. We are also a bit disorganized but as it’s our way of living we don’t realize it. It drives tourists and foreigners living in France nuts.

- We don’t open easily and sometimes we can see as suspicious someone who asks too many questions, particularly in Paris (less in the south, though)

- There’s a great hypocrisy concerning money. We live in a country where the notion of social classes is very important to us, where rich people are often despised and not seen as examples and where we don’t talk about how much we earn…but a lot of us want to be rich: we spent millions of Euros a year in lottery games. Speaking of social classes…

- Our relationship to communism is different. At the time where USA were obsessed to know who was communist and who was not, the communist party was one of the strongest parties in France, particularly among the working class. Consequently, it’s not unusual for a French to have a communist grand-father. In other words don’t freak out if you hear someone says “My grand Pa, who was a member of the Communist Party in the 70′s…”

- Lunch break is important. It baffles foreigners to see how long we take to have lunch even when we are busy. And we are obsessed with “good” food too. Yes, that one is true…even if we are the #1 European con summers when it comes hamburgers. Once again: contradiction.

- Hugging people. That’s not natural at all. Either we kiss people on the cheeks (2 times or 3 times or even 4 times depending on people or on the region they are from. It can awkward sometimes because you never know how many times someone will kiss you), either we shake their hands but hugging feels very…intimate and awkward.

- Secularity. We don’t joke with that shit. The US President ending his speeches with “God bless America” is something you will never see in France. The French President ends up his speeches with “Long live the Republic, long live France”, no reference to God.

- We don’t care about what politicians do with their private life and we don’t expect apologies when it happens. If they cheat on their wife or have 5 mistresses, it’s their problem. When the affair between President Hollande and Julie Gayet became public, a lot of people were not happy that he cheated on his partner, Valérie Trierveiler but the main concern was that he did all this using the tax payers money…and that he got caught because honestly, François, it’s not good for the image of the country.

(At least, we had fun with “scooter memes”)

- There’s a French obsession around a graduation degree called “The Baccalauréat”. French parents ABSOLUTELY want their kids to have this degree…while complaining that this degree has no value anymore because French schools have turned into an idiot factory (”une usine à crétins”)

- There’s a kind of “rivalry” between Paris and the rest of France. Parisians seem to see themselves as better than the rest of the country (it’s not my fault if it’s true…just saying. What? Yes, I’m a Parisian, how did you realize?) and the rest of France sees Parisian as grumpy, cold, despising, full of themselves, stressed sons of bitches. (ok, this is maybe true too but being amazing and fab comes with a price, ok?)

- Names. Like seriously enough with names like Yvette, Nicole or Robert if you write about someone who is in their 20-30′s. Nathan, Lucas, Léo, Gabriel, Timéo, Enzo, Louis, Raphaël, Arthur, Hugo, Jules, Ethan, Adam, Nolan, Tom, Noah, Théo, Sacha, Maël, Mathis. (most given boys names in 2015) and Emma, Lola, Chloé, Inès, Léa, Manon, Jade, Louise, Léna, Lina, Zoé, Lilou, Camille, Sarah, Eva, Alice, Maëlys, Louna, Romane, Juliette (most given girls names in 2015) are fine.
 
- France is a multi-ethnic country….

…so you can have a French character called Fatou or Sofiane. We have a lot of people from African or north-African descent, particularly in big cities. And exactly like French names, the trends have changed when it comes to the names of kids from north-African descents. For instance, bit less Mohamed and Fatima and more Rayan, Anis, Ilyès, or Sara. On the contrary, Asian kids (mainly with parents or grand-parents from China, Thailand, Vietnam) tend to have French names.

- We have a love/hate relationship with our national football team. They are a bunch of rude uneducated thugs with no values..except when they win, of course.

- We don’t care about striped shirts (at the exception of people from Brittany: striped shirts, the famous marinière, is imporiant) and mimes. Unless we are loaded, we don’t wear designer clothes.

- I don’t care what boring French movies with Louis Garrel show you, we don’t live in this kind of apartments (except for some rich people, of course):

And speaking of movies. A lot of French people pretend they know something/care about old movies but a lot of us have never seen a Nouvelle Vague movie. They are even considered as boring and pretentious.

- American supersize stuff. Is it really necessary? I mean, you can feed a family of 4 during two months with some of your portions.

- That thing below…

…is a fucking “pain au chocolat”. Don’t let people from the south west of France tell you it’s a “chocolatine”. They will try to fool you but stay strong my little one!

Voilà! The result of brainstorming with some friends. TLDR: We are loud, full of contradictions, nice if you understand our sense of humor and don’t touch to our NHS.

Good luck to you and happy writing. ♥

compliments for the signs
  • Aries: everyone is always pissing on yall for being angry. so what? you show emotion! you aren't afraid to stick up for what you believe in! PS i am waiting impatiently to be present for when some dumbass tells an Aries "dude, chilllllll" literally ill back you up leggo
  • Taurus: ok so everyone says you don't stop eating and you're lazy af. that's literally the entirety of Tumblr. my sister is a Taurus and yeah she eats loads and wont move to pick up a remote... and???? she's the best person i know, super fit, totally hilarious, and so are all of you. side note: why are you all so pretty??
  • Gemini: the "two-faced bitch" is getting annoying. i know loads of gems and none of them have wronged me or anyone i know. you guys have one of the best senses of dry humor, and you're always there to listen to my problems. you always get things done like one day you'll be commenting on some guys ass then bam you're dating him??? like that was easy
  • Cancer: i don't care if you're crying over spilt milk. gfy!!! you're sad! thank you for telling me!!! thank you for not being that person that says "i'm fine" and we all know is :( because that really sucks man i love being there for people thank you for opening up to me really
  • Leo: so you act really confident and self-aware and you hide your insecurities. NEWS FLASH: you shouldn't have any because you're fuggin 100% all the times i can't even begin. You're never afraid to try out new styles and you compliment those who look uncomfortable in their own skin and i love that. one last thing, i love it when you're so open about who you want to be and what you want to do and you don't care about other peoples opinions on that.
  • Virgo: there's so much more to you than your brains. you, gemini, scorpio, and taurus should just get together and let all the other signs watch ya'll talk because 8/8 m8 your humor is on point. also you're so understanding of your friends like you're so accepting. i could tell you i was going to have plastic surgery on my arm to add scales so i could be like a dragon and you'd tell me what color would look good on me.
  • Libra: this whole "superficial" biz is getting boring. ya'll are always so sweet to me. your the sign that, if they saw a kid crying, would go up to that stranger and ask whats wrong. then they'd go over to the kid that made em cry, see their point of view, and then properly unleash your wrath on the one in the wrong. like you're so fair and honest and unbiased and that's so cool because i'm sick of people not seeing others points of view.
  • Scorpio: sex-addict and psychopath is so old. hell yeah you're good at sex! hell yeah you get pissed! who doesn't? there's so much more to you than that. people forget you're in the water element for a reason. you're so insecure and sad and waiting for people to see you for who you are. you're so kind to your friends, you'd kill for them. (kidding). you're protective and passionate and feel everything so strong and great at reading people. you let others open up. thank you for that.
  • Sagittarius: i would give anything to go on a trip with you. they say you're detached af but everyone has their shit. so you have trouble opening up to people. so you have trouble talking to people about some things and sure you don't always show emotion. self-preservation ring a bell? you're doing your best being you. but please don't be afraid to open up. we all love you so much and you're so great and just such a wonderful person. don't stop that.
  • Capricorn: you work so hard. you're literally always pushing yourself and never asking for help but you're dying on the inside. you're wearing yourself thin and it has got to be exhausting. you make me day everyday with your laughs and humor and perkiness. you're legit so cute and you find the stupidest things funny. aLS0 your pet peeves are so cute. the weirdest things annoy you?? one example being that i used the word 'stupidest' in this.
  • Aquarius: you are s0 FUNNY omfg yeah you have that weird sense of humor and your aliens and memes 100% but that's so cool of you. you're so passionate about the world and your beliefs and no one gives you credit for that. plus you're such a leader. people would follow you blindly with your confidence. you typically see the good in the world and you're so free-spirited. legit 8/8 ily
  • Pisces: you're always stressed and constantly sad. don't. you have so much to live for. your laugh is so cute and you're so creative even though you don't admit it. you act tough at times but there's no need to. you could open up to anyone and they'd all be happy that you came to talk to them. you tell the best stories and your jokes are that stupid kinda funny. your awkwardness is adorable and i love you for that
  • HEY I WROTE THIS REALLY LONG DRABBLE BASED ON A HEADCANON FROM http: //untildawnff.tumblr.com/ AND I WAS GIVEN PERMISSION TO POST IT BUT CREDIT TO THEM FOR THE IDEA OKAY THANK YOU.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()
  • Sam
  • "So how are you and your boyfriend, Sam?" my mom asked on the other line of the phone. I rolled my eyes and inter ally sighed. I didn't actually have a boyfriend. But my, god was my mother getting annoying asking me when I'd get a boyfriend and bring him over. So I lied and said I did have one. Didn't even give her a name or anything. And somehow, she, and everyone else believed me. And it's been going for about two and a half weeks now.
  • "We're fine, mom." I sighed into the phone. My mom clicked.
  • "You don't sound fine." She inferred. Act in love, Sam.
  • "We are, don't worry, I'm just really tired." I reassured. She stayed silent for a moment.
  • "Okay... How about you two come over for dinner on Friday?" She asked. That caught me off guard. I moved out of my parents house a few months ago, since I was 18 and had enough money saved up. So I lived in an apartment building across town.
  • "Uhhh..." I pulled my phone away from my face to check what day it was. Wednesday. I haven't seen my parents or my brother and sister in almost a month. I couldn't say no.
  • "... sure..." I replied dully. She giggled.
  • "Great! I can't wait to meet this guy. I'm sure you got your paws on one handsome devil! Come around six?" She finished. My mouth ran dry. What the fuck was I gonna do? I couldn't come up with a clever break-up story in three days. Maybe I should tell them he died in some ridiculous way. That'd be kind of funny. But not believable. I guess I just had to go with it. I sighed.
  • "Yeah, I guess." I huffed. My mom giggled.
  • "Yay! Okay, I love you, baby! I'll see you then." She concluded before hanging up. I ended the call and threw my phone on the couch. Fuuuuuuck.
  • I thought for a long while and what the hell I was gonna tell my parents. I did NOT wanna tell them the truth and have them nag, nag, nag me about it. But what could I do? I thought for a while more before it came to me. I could have someone pretend to be my boyfriend for the night. I thought about my options. Right away, Mike and Matt were off the table. They were in the middle of some ridiculous love triangle with Emily. Chris wasn't exactly an option either. He and Ashley had something. I don't know what it is, but it's something. And the way Chris takes things, he'd get the wrong idea. So that only left one other person.. Josh. It's not that I didn't like Josh, because I did, I was closer to him then anyone else. But the thought of asking him to pretend to be my boyfriend for a night was a little weird. But what else could I do. I sighed and pulled out my phone and texted Josh.
  • 'I'm coming over.' I texted.
  • 'Ummm?? Ok but no ones here'
  • 'That's fine. Hahahaha I need a favor.'
  • 'Oh god. Should I be scared?'
  • 'Uh, maybe?'
  • ' jesus Sam'
  • 'Be there in like ten minutes.'
  • 'You suck'
  • I laughed and closed my phone, not responding. I gathered my stuff and headed to Josh's house. This was gonna be an interesting conversation.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()()
  • I approached Josh's house and groaned. I was already regretting it. But it was too late now. This was a better idea then any of the others I came up with. I walked up to the door and knocked.
  • "Helloooo? Josh?" I yelled. Nothing. I turned the handle of the door out of curiosity and sure enough, it was open. I walked in slowly, closing the door behind me.
  • "Josh?" I called again. Still nothing. I walked into the living room and sat my bag down. I've done this before and usually Josh is just in the bathroom or getting out of the shower or something. I stood and waited. For a lot longer then I wanted to. I pulled out my phone text him. Suddenly, a pair of hands jabbed my sides and a yelled in my ear. I knew damn well who it was but I still screamed and dropped my phone. I whirled around and go figure, there was Josh, giggling like an idiot. I flushed. I didn't like when people grabbed my sides.
  • "Josh!" I growled, slapping his arm as he laughed at my minor shame.
  • "Hey, lame-o, what's up?" He chuckled. I rolled my eyes, remembering this awkward talk I was about to have. I sighed.
  • "Hey, is everything okay?" He asked, his smile slowly dying away.
  • "Uhhh, okay. So remember my parents?" I asked. He nodded.
  • "Remember that thing I told them? That was actually true a few weeks ago?" I continued. He raised an eyebrow.
  • "Yeeaaaahhh..? The one where you told them you have a boyfriend when you very well do not?" He said, a ghost of a smile on his face. I nodded.
  • "Yeah, well, they wanna meet said boyfriend on Friday at their house for dinner, and I can't get out of it." I went on. Josh simply blinked.
  • "And... I need someone to pretend to be my boyfriend for the night." I finished, smiling a little too innocently. Josh was unresponsive for a moment before he ultimately burst into laughter. I stared at him as he laughed.
  • "Okay, okay, lemme get that straight. You want me to be your boyfriend for the night?" He repeated. I looked at the floor. Hearing it out of someone else, it sounded ridiculous.
  • "Yeeees..." I groaned. I didn't look at him.
  • "Okay." He said casually. I snapped my head up.
  • "What?" I asked, kind of skeptical that he agreed to this. Let alone as casually as he did.
  • "I said okay. I'll pretend to be your boyfriend so you don't have to deal with the wrath of your parents." He said clearly. Thank. God. I huffed.
  • "Thank you!" I groaned.
  • "No problem, babe." Josh said, winking at me. I blushed.
  • "No! Don't call me that." I stammered. He noticed my demeanor and snickered.
  • "Sorry, dear." He smirked.
  • "Stoooop! I'm going home, Josh." I growled.
  • "Whatever you say, baby." He continued. It was really weird coming from him.
  • "Goodbye! Josh!" I screeched, walking out the door.
  • "I LOVE YOU, BABYYYY!" He yelled after me.
  • "Baaaaaaaaaah!" I yelled back as I walked out of his yard.
  • "I will see you Friday at 5!" I yelled as I walked away. This was gonna be a looooong Friday.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()()()
  • Friday came a lot faster then I wanted it to and I dreaded it a lot. This was gonna be super weird. I mean, even if I was bringing my family an ACTUAL boyfriend, it would be weird. But it was going to be even weirder because I wasn't bringing them a boyfriend. I was bringing them a Josh. Good thing Josh has never met my parents before. A beep outside distracted me from my dreading. It was Josh. I took a deep breath and made my way out into the Fall outdoors. There was Josh outside my Apartment building in his stupid little car with a stupid little smile on his stupid little face. I wordlessly got into the passenger seat.
  • "Hey, you look nice." He complimented. I snorted. I really didn't. I'd usually dress a little better to go see my parents. But I didn't totally bum it. I could tell Josh had literally JUST got out of the shower because his hair was still a little wet and his entire car smelled like Axe.
  • "Are you seriously okay? I can pretend to be sick and you can tell your mom I have malaria." He suggested. I laughed, remembering that I actually considered telling my parents my boyfriend died.
  • "It's okay. I'm okay." I assured, nodding my head.
  • "Promise?" He asked, offering his pinky. I wrapped my pinky around his and squeezed.
  • "Promise." I repeated. He smiled.
  • "Okay." He said quietly before starting his car and setting off to my parents house.
  • "So, how should I act? What should I do?" He asked, sounding almost nervous. I raised an eyebrow. What did he have to be nervous about?
  • "Uhhh.. Just be you. We're gonna have to hold hands and whatnot but just be yourself." I shrugged. He nodded.
  • He opened his mouth to say something but closed it.
  • "What?" I asked. His face slowly got red and he shook his head.
  • "Nothing." He mumbled. I tilted my head. I've never see Josh like this. Josh was almost always goofy. Kind of cocky. Never did I ever see him nervous, this was kind of unlike him.
  • "What are you all nervous about?" I asked out of curiosity. He shook his head.
  • "I don't know...." he said, giving me a weird look. I dropped the subject as we pulled up in front of my parents house. I exhaled deeply.
  • Josh parked and looked at me.
  • "You ready?" He asked, his face suddenly eager. I rolled my eyes. Not really. But there was no turning back. I sighed and nodded my head.
  • "Yeah, let's go." I mumbled, getting out of the car. My stomach was in knots. I didn't really care if they didn't like him or not... Okay, I did, but that wasn't my main concern. My main concern was that now my parents will now forever think of Josh Washington as my boyfriend. And that was really weird to me. Josh waited for me and once I caught up to him he gave me one last look as to say "are you sure you're sure?" I nodded my head and walked up to the door, knocking gracefully.
  • "Don't be nervous." He whispered quickly, just before the door opened and my smiling mother appeared.
  • "Sammy-bear!" She squeaked before hugging me tightly.
  • "Hi, mom." I giggled. I was happy to see her after almost a month. I needed this. She eyed Josh for a moment.
  • "Is the boyfriend I've heard next to nothing about?" My mom asked. I was kind of flustered.
  • "Uh, yes! Mom, this is my b-boyfriend, Josh." I said with an awkward smile. It felt so weird to say. I looked at Josh and he seemed almost confused and a bit lost. I grabbed his hand and gave him a look. He looked surprised for a moment, before snapping back into it.
  • "Uh-um, yeah, hi, I'm Josh Washington. Nice to finally meet you." He greeted politely. I was surprised he was capable.
  • "Hello, Josh, nice to finally meet you, too." My mom said. This might not be too bad.
  • "Well, come on in!" My mom cheered, scurrying into two house. I looked at Josh. He looked back at me.
  • "You okay?" He asked. I nodded. He squeezed my hand a little tighter. I involuntarily smiled. What the hell is happening to me? I brushed it off and yanked Josh in the house. I followed my mom into the dining room.
  • "Hey, Sam's here with her boyfriend!" My mom announced to my father, brother, and sister at the table.
  • "How much did you pay him to show?" My brother asked, causing Josh to chuckle. I, took my hand from his and elbowed him in the ribs.
  • "Shut up, Evan." I growled.
  • "Relax," Josh whispered in my ear. I let out a breath and calmed down. It was awkward for a moment, Josh and I being the only ones standing.
  • "Well, don't to strangers, sit down, you two!" My dad said. I did as my dad said and dragged Josh to a chair next to me and we both sat down.
  • "Uh, Josh, this is my dad. My brother, Evan, and my sister, Brooke." I introduced.
  • "Hi." He said awkwardly. Everyone else kind of mumbled "hellos."
  • "Well, dinners almost done, so for now, we can just talk." My mom shrugged.
  • "Josh." My dad said. Josh tensed up next to me.
  • "Yes?"
  • "Do you wanna come and help me get drinks for everyone?" My dad asked. I instantly got nervous. He was about to have a talk with Josh. And with Josh's attitude it might not be too pleasant. And Josh knew it because his foot started tapping on the floor like crazy. I put my hand on his.
  • "U-um, yeah!" He stammered. My dad nodded and got up up, then walking into the kitchen. Josh got up and walked with him, but not before giving me a peck on my head, which made me blush hard. My mother grinned as he walked away, noticing my almost surprised expression.
  • "How long have you two been dating?" My sister asked. I blinked slowly.
  • "A little more then a month." I said, kind of out of it.
  • "He really likes you, huh? He does! I can tell by the ways he acts!" My sister inquired. That caught me a little off guard and I had to think. I wasn't too sure if Josh was a good actor or not, but tonight it seemed like it. But then again, he was so nervous before we got here... And he was obviously trying to make some sort of good impression on my mom and who knows what's he saying to my dad.
  • "Right?" My sister asked. I thought a little but slowly nodded.
  • "Yeah.. I guess he does." I mumbled. As if on cue, my dad and Josh came out of the kitchen. I was almost surprised when thy came out laughing and talking. Josh slid in the chair next to me and my dad sat down as well.
  • "Some drinks..." Evan muttered. My dad's expression turned a bit sour upon realizing he didn't even get drinks.
  • "Damn. I'll get 'em." He said plainly, going back into the kitchen. I leaned close to Josh.
  • "What'd you say to him?" I whispered for only him to hear, kind of puzzled by how my dad was totally and absolutely cool with it. Josh smiled.
  • "The truth." He whispered confidently. My eyes went wide.
  • "About the you and I situation?" I replied. He shook his head.
  • "Not exactly." He whispered. I gave him a puzzled look and he just smiled at the rest of the table. I raised an eyebrow, kind of afraid of what they talked about. I almost didn't wanna know.
  • ()()()()()()()()()()()
  • The night went okay, Josh and I did fake couple things like hold hands at the table and and hug a little longer then most would. Everyone got along. It wasn't that bad. And the night was almost over.
  • "How about me make toasts?" My dad suggested.
  • "With Pepsi?" I quirked, tilting my head. My mom shrugged.
  • "Why not?" My mom smiled. She stood.
  • "I'll go first... A toast to my lovely family! I wouldn't change a thing." She said before sitting down. I smiled. Evan stood.
  • "A toast to myself. Because I am a bad-ass motherfucker." He said. My mother gasped and I slapped my hand over my mouth. Josh, however, proceeded to laugh his ass off.
  • "Evan! Language!" My father hissed. Evan just smirked. I slapped Josh's arm as he laughed hysterically.
  • "Josh!" I growled, trying myself not to laugh. He tapped my arm.
  • "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm calm." He chuckled, clearing his throat. Emma stood.
  • "A toast to Sam! I'm glad you finally decided to come over." She grinned and sat back down.
  • "Thank you." I mouthed to her before standing up for my turn. I thought before I spoke.
  • "Ahh, a toast to all of you! Mom, dad, Emma, Evan, Josh. You're all so important to me, and I don't know what I'd to without you." I finished before sitting down. Josh didn't even look at me before he stood up. He took a deep breath before starting.
  • "Okay, um, a toast to... My girlfriend. My beautiful, amazing, best friend. Sam.. I don't know where I'd be if I'd never met you. And I can never, ever, repay you for what you've done for me. Thank you." Josh finished before finally sitting back down. My jaw dropped open. I couldn't believe what he said. I looked at him for a long time. He didn't look back at me. A smile slowly stretched across my face and I leaned over and pecked Josh on the cheek. He smiled and blushed.
  • "That was nice..." my mother said quietly. My dad stood up.
  • "Well, my toast is also to my wonderful family. And Josh, who I hope will stay around a long while. Tonight was perfect in the most imperfect way. And that's just the way I want it." My father finished to close the night. We all smiled. My mother wiped the forming tears out of her eyes. Josh wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me into him. I leaned into his chest and smiled. Tonight was amazing.
  • "Um, I really think we should get going.." I announced, intertwining my fingers with Josh's
  • "Are you sure?" My mom asked. I nodded.
  • "Yeah, it's getting late I'm tired." I said. My brother snorted.
  • "Use condoms." He said. My face flushed and Josh laughed.
  • "Evan, stop!" I hissed. Josh squeezed my shoulder and I relaxed. I don't know why that of all things calmed me down. My head was all confused, I needed sleep.
  • "Oh yeah, I almost forgot." Josh mumbled. I was about to ask what he was talking about until he pulled me into him and brushed his lips against mine. I didn't respond out of surprise. And then he stepped back. I couldn't speak, just babbled incoherent things. Did... he just... do that? Maybe it was just for my parents to see it now something, I don't know. Now we really needed to go.
  • "Bye everyone, I love you!" I said loudly before dragging Josh out the door. We got in the car and drove away.
  • "Well that was ah... Interesting." Josh quirked. I nodded slowly. And it was. It went a lot better then expected to
  • "Yeah...." I mumbled, still kind of shocked by the random kiss. I didn't know if he was planning it or what but I was still kind of surprised. I mean, I was still have a hard time processing Josh as my "boyfriend."
  • "Maybe we should go out as a couple again sometime. Pretend to be a couple around town." Josh shrugged. I snorted.
  • "Or we could not pretend.." he said quietly. What was he implying? I mean, I knew he was joking but still. I laughed.
  • "Good one." I replied. He stayed silent for a second.
  • "Yeah, I was uh... just.... just joking." He said quietly. The rest of the care ride was silent until he pulled up to my apartment building.
  • "Thank you so, so, so much for this Josh! I have no idea how to repay you!" I thanked as I exited the car. He put a hand up.
  • "Don't. Tonight was nice." He said. I nodded and turned to walk inside. Then I remembered something I wanted to ask him and turned back around.
  • "Josh?" I asked. He looked at me.
  • "Yeah?"
  • "When you said you told my dad the truth... What did you mean?" I asked curiously. Josh bit his lip and raised his eyebrows.
  • "Well.. He asked me how I really felt about you. So I told him the truth." Josh said simply. I thought for a minute. But when my dad came out of the kitchen, he was still obviously under the impression that Josh and I were dating. Wait a minute... I finally put two and two together. He literally asked me out in the car and I thought he was kidding! He was not kidding!
  • "Oh, wait, Josh..." I said, feeling like an asshole. He shook his head.
  • "Don't worry about it, Sam. I'll see you later." He said, driving off without another word.  I called for him but he kept driving, driving, driving and then he was gone. My head was running wild. I'm so dumb. I didn't realize Josh liked me.. I'm not even sure how I feel about him. I mean... I don't know if I like him... Of course not, its Josh. Obviously I do, he's the only one that can do what he does to me. Ugh, this was so confusing. Suddenly, my phone started to buzz and I pulled it out of my pocket and it was a text. From Josh.
  • "I had to do it just once." It said. I ran my fingers over my lips and felt my cheeks get red.
  • Ugh... Josh... What did I do?

space-chan  asked:

Help me out. I don't understand how people could be offended by Luftrauser's graphic style. Yes, the nazis were bad but these are cartoonish caricatures in an arcadey video game where you can fly a knife plane. There is no plot. I'm usually with people on these things but I'm totally lost. Let me rephrase, I can understand why people could be offended, but I don't understand why there is an uproar. No artist should cave because some people aren't happy. Not trying to fight, just confused.

Let’s start unpacking this.

“I don’t understand how people could be offended by Luftrauser’s graphic style.”

The first step is realizing you might not understand someone else’s position but can respect them for having it. That’s basic empathy. You don’t have to agree with them, but given your life experiences are different from this other person, it’s possible to, at least, realize they have a reason for it.

Now, let’s look at what Elizabeth Simins (a terrific artist whose work you might be familiar with on Kotaku) and Rob Dubbin (a writer on The Colbert Report) originally said. From what I understand, Simins started publicly talking about this issue, and Dubbin later came to her defense.

I have a question about Luftrausers: is there some political point to playing as nazis or is it supposed to be funny?

— Elizabeth Simins (@ElizSimins)

April 4, 2014

Aaaand I feel like it’s a bit weird that there’s this v popular indie game where you play as funny nazis and nobody is talking about that?

— Elizabeth Simins (@ElizSimins)

April 4, 2014

It’s easy to give the benefit of the doubt to Beloved Indies but I’m telling you I’ve heard lots of fans say “you play as nazis, right?”

— Elizabeth Simins (@ElizSimins)

April 4, 2014

\

So I guess if you are playing Luftrausers, just at least keep in mind what it would feel like for a Jew to play it? Because ugh

— Elizabeth Simins (@ElizSimins)

April 4, 2014

Simins does not ask for developer Vlambeer to change the way Luftrausers looks, but simply raises the question about whether its aesthetic could be reasonably seen as leveraging nazi imagery in a way that’s been glossed over because the game is so damn fun to play. (Which it is.) This is what we call criticism, and it’s especially important to be critical of that which we love. That’s often the hardest.

A few hours later, Dubbin weighed in on Twitter, as well.

so luftrausers: as a jew, what offends me is the aesthetic. as a game designer, what offends me is the absence of critical distance from it.

— Rob Dubbin (@robdubbin)

April 4, 2014

most jews of my generation grew up hearing “never again” from their relatives and hebrew schools. easy to dismiss as pablum, but here we are

— Rob Dubbin (@robdubbin)

April 4, 2014

i don’t believe vlambeer are nazi sympathizers or anything vile like that. seems more to me like *fascination*. which is its own problem.

— Rob Dubbin (@robdubbin)

April 4, 2014

more broadly, it’s all of our problem that it’s only coming up now + normalized to where “nazi stuff” is at worst a “con” in a review

— Rob Dubbin (@robdubbin)

April 4, 2014

and you know i was a part of that, in the sense that i only talked about this privately until @elizsimins was braver than i was and spoke up

— Rob Dubbin (@robdubbin)

April 4, 2014

so: let’s not pile on vlambeer, let’s definitely not pile on @elizsimins. the cure for this is education/awareness/sensitivity. never again.

— Rob Dubbin (@robdubbin)

April 4, 2014

A-ha. Dubbin underscores the subtext of the aesthetic content in Luftrausers: maybe we’ve become desensitized to nazi imagery as a culture, likely in a way less true in Jewish circles for…obvious reasons. This big picture cultural question isn’t easy to digest but worth asking.

Vlambeer doesn’t have to respond to this. Dubbin and Simins expressed their opinions, and that could have easily been the end of this. But Rami Ismail has proven himself to be an intensely empathetic figure who is OK listening to the opinions of others, even if it’s critical of his own work. It’s not easy to acknowledge criticism, and even harder to grant it any merit.

Yet, Ismail does exactly this in a blog post. There’s far too much to quote, but here’s the part that underscores what I’m talking about:

“We do have to accept that our game could make some people uncomfortable. We’re extremely sad about that, and we sincerely apologise for that discomfort.

The fact is that no interpretation of a game is ‘wrong’. When you create something, you leave certain implications of what you’re making. We can leave our idea of what it is in there, and for us, the game is about superweapons. We think everybody who plays LUFTRAUSERS can feel that.

But even more so in an interactive medium, we do have to accept that no way of reading those implications is ‘false’ – that if someone reads between the lines where we weren’t writing, those voids can be filled by the player, or someone else. If we accept there’s no wrong interpretation of a work, we also have to accept that some of those interpretations could not be along the lines of what we’re trying to create.”

From there, Ismail goes on to explain why he disagrees with Dubbin and Simins, even while acknowledging their opinion is a valid interpretation. That line is so critically important to having a reasonable, nuanced dialogue about difficult subjects, and it’s the part we often miss out on.

It often feels people confuse “criticism” with “censorship” in a way that is never intended when those speaking up are explaining their views. 

It is unlikely Luftrausers will undergo any major aesthetic change as a result of what Simins and Dubbin said, but the conclusion of this exchange brings a better understanding of what Vlambeer intended by creating Luftrausers. No one has to agree with either side, but our understanding of Luftrausers’ place in game culture was deepened.

That’s not controversy. That’s criticism, and I wish we had way more of it.

anonymous asked:

Hi, Gabi! I don't wanna stir drama or anything, don't publish this, please, but I just wanted to say that I kinda get it how the blogger who trash talked L and today is saying they love him. Like, I'm a harrie larrie and H's stunts affect me emotionally more than L's (unless it's bg, this shit is the worst (tm)). When yachtgate happened I was so freaking mad at him, at everything, really. I knew it was all a show, but I couldn't contain it. And I think it was just an emotion for the moment, (1)

after the shitshow was over I was much better and still loved him, so… It was just something that messed up with my mind (and I still feel sick whenever that days or Kendall are mentioned, but alas). I can’t talk for the people who said these things about L and I’m not saying they were right to do what they did, but I guess it was just a thing for the moment and what L did today was really great, it brought hope again to lots of people, it lift the mood of the fandom. (2)

Of course he didn’t need to do anything, even if he didn’t do this to reassure us. Times are really hard in the fandom, and I think it’s normal to react like this when it gets too much in tour head, I know I’ve done it, so… And most important, I have to say that I’m sorry you get shit for staying positive and I really appreciate your lightness, stay awesome, Gabi! <3 (3) 

——————

Hi there, you asked me not to publish this but as you were on anon and I think you touched a subject that would be important to discuss, I am going to address it and I am going to answer this as an adult person and not as a Larrie. 

I think it is normal to be affected by events, some more than others, and I am not going to say you can’t be affected because that is bs, we are all invested in HL, some more than others, but I think this anger comes from the frustration of not understanding what is happening. And that comes from the constant need of wanting to BE IN THE KNOW, because people are used to being in the know in the past, they are used to seeing through the transparency, they are used to patterns, they are used to the repetition of stunts and events. But the thing is: there is no transparency anymore, at least not like before. The update accounts are absolutely totally out of the loop and no one knows anything.

They are with a new management now, they are getting actual advice and actual protection (and yes i refer to Louis now, because we have NO IDEA how bad babygate would have turned if it was not for the new team protecting Louis. Otherwise we would have had:

  • Media not mocking and treating it as a joke
  • active participation from the band members
  • no Larry mention and no pregnant Harry manip,
  • a promised baby shower,
  • engagement,
  • several romantic pap walks together,
  • a full spread photoshoot,
  • rep statements,
  • threatening with lawsuit for the fake baby claims
  • etc etc

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