just a 1 off because i was laughing too much jfc

anonymous asked:

LEELA PLS ANALYZE THE NEW DAPCRAFTS VID I CANT STOP SCREAMING

it was,,,,,, so fucking good. i just need to rant for a bit about so many aspects of this video because like not only was it genuinely so funny and original and creative, it was just SO WELL MADE. there were so many small details about it that i couldn’t even believe.  they put so much actual effort into it and they’re also both so naturally funny when it comes to this kind of humor. ahhhh there were so many good things to talk about that i hardly know where to begin or like how to even organize my thoughts so just like,,, be ready bc this is about to be the most incoherent ramble 

first of all. dnp work so well together. i mean. we know this, we see it all the time. but there’s a lot of humor in the crafts videos that is just completely improvised within the larger pre-planned structure/concept. and they bounce off each other SO well in this setting (maybe even better than they do in many of their normal collabs, at least from a comedic standpoint.) i think a lot of this has to do w the fact that the satirical cheeriness of the “characters” that they play, that is over-emphasized to the point of being creepy, just lends itself really well to so many amazing one-liners. but also they just have such good chemistry that is so readily apparent in this context,,, it makes me emotional. they consistently set each other up for jokes, if one person improvises a certain action or behavior the other goes along with it or reacts to it immediately and that’s a mark of rly well-practiced entertainers but also two people who know each other really well and i love watching it play out.

i also do have to acknowledge that they are both fundamentally quite talented. all three of the craft videos are examples of really genuinely witty humor and they showcase that side of dnp so well. both of them also have such a good sense of comedic timing and even an intuition for physical comedy and they’re also rly creative with how they edit these videos and the union of all of those elements is what makes these videos so good in my opinion. while i believe dan’s explanation that the first crafts video was filmed quite spontaneously without much of a plan (and that’s why it’s super short and not as funny as the latter two imo), i do think they put a lot of thought and effort into this one which is quite clear through many of the details they worked into the video both during the filming itself and then afterwards in the editing. first of all the overall concept of them being taken by satan as a culmination of the extremely subtle creepy undertones from the first one is just so smart bc no one would expect them to take it that far and the total hyperbolic unlikeliness of it is what makes it so damn funny. i think most ppl were expecting when dan said he’s keeping his stamp a secret that it would just be some sort of satanic symbol like what happened in the glitter faces vid but like,,, no one thought it’d escalate to where it did. it was so unexpected and over the top but somehow still not overdone or so forced as to dilute the comedy. it synthesized humor with genuinely unsettling creepiness and that is such a difficult balance to achieve. 

you can tell they put a lot of thought into it on so many levels. for instance they worked in all these rly subtle allusions to satan himself before the weird ritual scene happens, like dan saying “this one’s long with a big head like him” (ty for describing satans cock to us dan jfc) and phil saying “i’ve selected as many knives as friends i have, which is two.” then even during the ritual scene they work in things like the cow noise since a common satanic symbol is a horned deity (baphomet lol). and in their new channel description they use the case file name 19-1-20-1-14 which decodes to the word “satan” if you use a basic letter-number cipher (in which each number stands for the letter that is that position in the alphabet. ’s’ is the 19th letter, ‘a’ is the first, and so on.) and there are so many other little editing quirks that give this video that unsettling undertone, as well as editing quirks that add to the comedy of it and it’s all just so well done. for example the voice editing on certain words like “sharp” and “go away.” the audio overlays of heavy breathing at various points and random cuts to black screens. the use of creepy music at strategic places throughout. at 4:36 they recorded themselves saying protip backwards just to reverse it and they even spell out the “protip” text backwards, seemingly both as a way to shit on the whole ‘protip’ trope from the last vid and also to make fun of the way that satanists/conspiracy theorists think there are hidden messages in popular songs and shit that u can only hear if u play the audio backwards. ugh i hate them and their many layers of references. phil also references this again during the ritual part, when dan lights the match (he just goes “portip” “portip” as though he’s trying to say it backwards lol.) and then they fuck around w the word protip throughout the video almost like they’re making fun of it. there’s also definitely a subtle pitch manipulation of their voices as the video progresses. by the end they sound like they’ve sucked on a little bit of helium but it happens gradually enough that you’re just a little bit put off and you can’t really place why. then there’s the little comedic touches like the siren sound when “carefully” flashes across the screen. the fact that the legal disclaimer for adult supervision is cut off at the sides. the zoom in on the fleck of green paint that lands on dan when phil’s pouring it into the plate. ugh like damn i just want to make the point that they clearly put work into this and on face value it seems like a shoddy home video w a weird satanic ending but there’s a reason this works so well and feels so creepy and simultaneously laugh out loud funny and it’s bc they’re genuinely talented and we don’t always get to see that creative talent at work in their standard formulas for videos on their regular channels so i’m just so grateful that they made something like this where it seems like they allow themselves to exercise more of that creative energy. it begs a lot of questions about why they don’t do shit like this more,,,  and i think there are a number of reasons they feel safe and happy making what they generally make now but i’m jst so happy that at least in these videos they’ve branched out and done something so creative and good.

on that note. i just need to ramble about phil. i don’t think anyone can dispute that phil really carries these videos and partly that’s because he’s been in the role of the “teacher” in all three videos so he inevitably comes across as more dominant and sets the tone for the humor, but also like,,, he just works so well in this style and comes up with such spontaneous and WITTY little remarks that inevitably become the standout lines from each vid (in this one, for example, “potato is in my top ten favorite fruit,” “sometimes it’s nice to look up at the stars and remember that they’re all already dead,” “if you make a mistake while cutting just think about it for the rest of the day,” etc. and one of my fav from the past, “if you’re left handed ask a friend” (d: why am i left handed) “everybody makes mistakes!”) he also seems to improvise a lot of the physical comedy in the videos (in this one, the way he just stared at the paint as he squeezed it out for way too long, the way he threw around the cutting boards and plates, the way he did the chopping; and in past ones, slamming his hands on the paper and on dan’s hands when mixing the glitters, clacking the scissors super loudly in the first one, etc.) i just love these videos so much bc they’re some of the only ones that we have these days where phil is really doing most of the comedic legwork and dan definitely helps and bounces off of him but mostly lets phil take charge and i live for it. and while there’s obvi no way to tell who rly did the editing for the video (and i’m sure it was a mix of both of them) there’s no denying that the editing style and general creepiness (especially of the ritual sacrifice scene lol) bear a lot of similarities to the feeling/vibe/editing quirks in a lot of phil’s old school videos (i’m thinking like tape 6 and the basket which, if any of you reading these have not watched, please just open a tab right now and do that before you finish reading this lol.) the choppy way the different clips are spliced together in the whole ritual scene (where one second dan is stamping phil, then lighting a match and chanting, then phil’s chanting, then he’s slumped over and then there are two videos overlaid on top of each other when dan is actually stamping phil’s back and then the sudden cut to black) it’s all so reminiscent of those older videos and it does make me feel like phil had a larger creative hand in thinking about how this video should be put together and that just makes me so happy to think about. i’ve always wondered what phil does w his self-professed obsession with horror and his interest in violence and psychological thrillers and whatnot, as well as his former academic/critical study of filmmaking. it makes sense that he doesn’t feel comfortable exploring those interests by making things himself in this genre in a real way and especially not on youtube because his self-described objective through this platform is to provide his audience with light and uplifting entertainment. more pragmatically, he’s trying to make a living from this job and hold somewhat broad-based appeal through the videos he makes and it makes sense that lighter content that doesn’t require too much intellectual rigor would fare better and hold more consistent audience engagement. and more personally, making things on the level of tape 6, even years later w more familiarity with editing and whatnot and perhaps more skill in writing scripts/characters/plots, still would involve a certain degree of personal emotional vulnerability that the current amazingphil format doesn’t demand. in short, venturing into these territories creatively would be a risk on a lot of levels. it would invite more formal critique of his work. it would invite more people trying to read into who he is and his psyche (which are things that i feel like he’s actually terrified of and that’s part of why he’s built such a protective barrier against it). it would be a risk and it makes sense that he doesn’t want to take it, at least not right now. but it’s just lovely to see that he still has the capacity to make things in the vein of those older videos and to make them WITH DAN and mix them with comedy which i need to reiterate is such a hARD THING TO DO!!!! and  idk it just rly makes me so happy to watch and to think about. 

i love phil so much, and none of this is meant to dilute dan’s role since i’m sure he did inform some of the decisions here, but i just think that dan as phil’s biggest fan (since 2007 y’all) would feel many of these same things about phil’s older content and support phil’s desire to engage that darker creative energy/talent he has hiding under all of those layers of syrupy happiness and amiability. i love that this is sort of an update to that vintage dark!phil content bc it’s the same dark undertones, same editing quirks, etc. but now it’s mixed with rly cheeky humor and maybe that’s dan’s influence or maybe it’s still phil, but a phil that has shared his life w someone w this particular irreverent and sarcastic sense of humor for so many years and this video shows the confluence of those two things in such a lovely and original way and just,,,, ugh. this video was so much and i loved it SO much. truly so, so good i was not prepared to feel so many deep-seated Emotions over some god damn satanic propaganda i need help. 

(danandphilcrafts - potato prints)

anonymous asked:

I'm so glad Kirishima is getting so much spotlight, he really deserves it!!!! And it looks like hes gonna get more, since hes in the main group along with Deku, Uraraka and Tsuyu. I;m so hyped!!!

Honestly!!!!!!!!!!! That’s one interesting group tbh, Kirishima and Tsuyu’s interactions are always incredibly adorable to watch and seeing Kirishima interact for so long with pure and good people is gonna be hard on my heart (I mean, you know I’m 100% a bakusquad fan but they’re all at least in part assholes and Kiri fits with them just right, he can be just like Sero and Kaminari and I love it, but then his interactions with Amajiki have been so pure can you imagine an arc filled with that I’m already crying)

I just hope my other faves won’t completely disappear through this arc haha sigh

Anon said: So which Kacchan quote do you like best “Die your bacteria fucks, dieee!” or “BRING YOUR DAMN TRASH TO ME”?

LMAO SORRY ANON BUT MY FAVE GOTTA BE

WHAT A GODDAMN DISASTER THIS BOY IS

Keep reading

hi. hello. so this fic isn’t finished or even polished. this is really just kind of like a preview of a fic, i guess? but i’ve been working on it in the background for a while - it’s my “i’m frustrated with all of my WIPs so i’m going to work on this instead” fic, but i thought i would send the first couple thousand words out into the world and see if anyone likes them.

this fic’s working title is “kent parson’s imaginary cat (and other adventures)” and originally it was going to be a funny 5+1 thing about how kent’s cat is terrible and hates everyone, but then?? idek what happened. actually, i do know. what happened is that brevity is not my strong suit and also i started thinking too long and hard about what happened to the other friends that kent and jack had in the Q and what they thought about everything that went down. then i wanted to write about a former Q teammate being traded to the aces and re-uniting with kent. and also kit purrson being mean to said teammate.

okay, well anyway, please have this first chapter-ish of a troyson fic that i may or may not ever finish. (your encouragement would go a long way.) it’s really for @zimmermaenner :)

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GETTING BACK TOGETHER | Yuta
  • Nakamoto Yuta
  • “Healing Smile”
  • like when you see him smile, any pain or discomfort that you feel right now instantly vanishes
  • one time, you just had a leg operation so he visited you at the hospital
  • your leg hurts as hell like boi wtf is this
  • Yuta being Yuta, brought you fruits instead of flowers
  • “You don’t need flowers”
  • “You can’t eat them so I just thought of bringing you fruits”
  • you start eating the fruits he brought and while you’re eating, he’s just watching you
  • and you’re like “WHAT?”
  • He just giggles and smiles at you
  • then BOOM
  • the pain from your leg operation just disappeared
  • when you first met him, you thought that he’s the type of guy who doesn’t take things seriously
  • because he’s so cheerful and talkative af during breaktimes at your school
  • he’s the captain of your school’s soccer team yet you see him play soccer with the younger kids during breaktime lol Yuta
  • until you saw him one time while he was practicing soccer
  • that’s when you noticed that he REALLY takes things seriously especially his love for soccer
  • that’s why he’s so good at playing it and became the team captain because he practices really hard
  • whenever you’re sad, he’s always there to do aegyos in front of you
  • which by the way makes you cringe so hard
  • but still manages to get you laugh and lessen all your worries
  • you also know about his dreams of becoming an idol
  • and you support him with it
  • so you let him leave, allowing him to pursue his dream
  • you are aware that it wouldn’t be easy
  • but never thought that it would be this DIFFICULT
  • if before you guys would talk for hours on the phone, now that they’ve debuted, you guys only get 10 minutes to talk with each other
  • sometimes, there’s an additional 20 minutes to it if you guys were lucky
  • until those calls suddenly stopped
  • “Nakamoto Yuta is currently unavailable right now. Please just leave a message right after the tone.” -BeeeEEEEeeep-
  • From “One Call Away” to “We Don’t Talk Anymore” real quick #CharliePuthZoned ok i’m such a horrible person i’m sorry hahahaha no i’m not hahahahahahaha
  • Your situation would be somehow similar to Jaehyun
  • except that the fans both love you guys
  • Only Yuta knows about the company not being in favour of your relationship
  • so the company asks him to break up with you
  • “EITHER SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR CAREER OR TO THAT GIRL. YOU CHOOSE.”
  • “They really said that?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!” - Hansol
  • “That’s such a foul move.” - Johnny
  • “It definitely is a foul move.” - Taeyong
  • “You guys can still date secretly. Chill out.” - Haechan
  • “Haechan, I think you’re forgetting the fact that we’re not trainees anymore.” - Yuta
  • “But (y/n) noona is really fun to be with. I wish there’s a way out of this.” - Mark
  • “Tell the company that you got her pregnant.” - Jaehyun
  • *insert the members facepalming themselves*
  • lol Jaehyun no… just no
  • yes they did give him a death glare
  • “That’s supposed to be my line Jaehyun. Jfc.” - Ten
  • The members tried to give him suggestions on how to make this easy
  • but they only ended up giving him useless and dumb suggestions
  • and that’s when they realized that it will never be easy no matter what
  • Yuta texted you that he has one week off from his work
  • you felt very excited because this means that you guys would be spending so much time together
  • but Yuta didn’t feel the same way
  • for him, it’s like a countdown towards doomsday
  • though he never let it show what’s really bothering him because oh look how beautiful and relieving his smile is
  • problems? where?
  • what is even a PROBLEM?
  • DAY 1: Yuta took you to the Korean stationery shops
  • He helped you choosing which calligraphy pens you need for your project even though they’re just the same colour but different brand.
  • He even told you “I hope you’ll use those pens when you write your love letter for me at our anniversary” yuta’s_healing_smile.jpg
  • DAY 2: He took you to your favourite Korean restaurant
  • He lets you order any food that you want but when he noticed that you only mostly ordered meat he frowns
  • “Hey, it’s not fair that you’re the only one who’s gonna eat meat”
  • “Eat some vegetables too”
  • And when you protest, he shoves a spoonful of vegetables into your mouth
  • You: “STOP BEING LIKE TAEYONG EOMMA!”
  • “I just want you to be healthy that’s why I’m making you eat veggies too. I don’t want you getting sick. Who will be my food buddy once you got sick?” then he wipes away the leftover sauce on your lips
  • DAY 3: He took you out to get some bubbletea
  • Even though it’s freezing cold, you guys still got those cold bubbletea drinks you guys are weird
  • “Hey Yuta, you want to try my purple taro?”
  • “Sure”
  • But instead of tasting it through the plastic straw, he tastes it through your lips
  • and guuuuuurl, he’s a great kisser
  • DAY 4: He took you to the movies
  • He cried when the dog died
  • but he bawled his eyes out the most when the guy and the girl from the same movie broke up wow affected much
  • he cried so loud that the people inside the theatre told him to shut up and fuck off
  • so you guys didn’t end up finishing the movie and just left
  • “Omg Yuta, I’ve never seen you cry over something fictional”
  • He suddenly hugs you tight
  • “Jagiya, always remember that I love you so much, okay?”
  • “What is wrong with you Yuta? Why are you being like this all of a sudden?”
  • “Jagiya, just promise me that you’ll always remember how much I love you, okay? Don’t ever forget that, no matter what happens.”
  • DAY 5: He took you to Lotte World Ice Rink
  • You don’t even know how to skate but it didn’t matter because Yuta was there to help you
  • He would occasionally laugh at you slipping on the ice but mostly, his hands would either be holding your hands or your waist
  • which results for him to hug you a lot
  • “Yuta, how can I even skate if you’re hugging me like this?”
  • “It’s cold jagiya. Let me warm up at least.”
  • “Of course it’s gonna be cold. We’re inside an ice skating rink!”
  • On that same day, he also took you to Sky Rose Garden
  • “Woooooooow! Look at how beautiful these roses are, Yuta!”
  • “But they’re not as beautiful as you.” - Yuta
  • yaaaaaaaas boi that’s how you do it
  • you blush with what he said then he cups your face and kisses you on the lips
  • DAY 6: He took you to N Seoul Tower
  • “Why’d you bring a lock?”
  • He doesn’t answer you and just writes both of your names on the lock
  • underneath your names, he wrote: “If life won’t let us be together for now, then love will find a way to make us stay together for a lifetime in the future.”
  • this is heartbreaking Yuta why
  • stop it
  • anywayyyy…
  • you blushed a hell lot when you read what he wrote
  • your heart skipped a beat when both of you placed the lock on
  • Yuta kept the key but he said that he’s gonna leave it at the Postbox of Love so that no one finds the key for your lock.
  • DAY 7: You guys went to Yeojwacheon Stream
  • You guys just took a stroll there and kept taking pictures of each other
  • You were a little bit sad because it’s your last day of being together and after this, he’s going back to work again
  • Yuta, on the other hand, is feeling way worse
  • He’s having conflicted emotions
  • He wants to stay with you forever but he couldn’t because he has a career that he wanted to protect too
  • So he decided to do it tomorrow
  • and let you guys have your last moment as a couple
  • That evening, he cried when you guys stopped by the bridge
  • “What’s wrong?”
  • “I’m just gonna miss you so much.”
  • Then without any further ado, he kisses you again on the lips
  • but you noticed something different with his kisses
  • they were full of desperation though you didn’t mind it that much anyway
  • He whispers to you: “I love you (y/n)… gosh, I love you so much.”
  • “I love you too.”
  • dO YOU heAR ThAT?!?!?!
  • tHAT’S thE SounD OF MY HEArt BREAKing…
  • The next day, after they had a tv guesting, he asked if you guys could meet up again
  • He says that he has something to tell you
  • He went to your house looking all sullen
  • You noticed it immediately but you just waited for him to tell you what’s wrong
  • “Let’s break up”
  • You blinked twice, trying to process what he just told you
  • “I-It’s cold out here. Do you want to come inside first for a warm tea?”
  • You hoped that he would reject it but a part of you wishes that he would accept your offer
  • HE DIDN’T ACCEPT YOUR OFFER
  • “I’m sorry”
  • “So I guess this is it, huh?” You tried not to cry but you start tearing up anyway
  • He nods and looks at you directly which broke you guys even more
  • “Before I let you go, may I know the reason why you’re breaking up with me?”
  • He sighs, “It’s not just gonna work out. I’m too busy. I… I can’t fulfill my duties and responsibilities towards you.”
  • “I don’t want to be unfair to you”
  • “You deserve better”
  • “Please try to be happy without me” then he left
  • Y O U   D I D   N O T   S T O P   C R Y I N G    A B O U T   I T    U N T I L  7   D  A   Y   S    L A T E R
  • You didn’t know this but three days after your break up with him, he went back to all of the places that you guys had gone together
  • He even went to N Seoul Tower and tried to take off your lock
  • yes he kept the key he didn’t leave it at the Postbox of Love
  • he failed at taking off the lock and just burst out crying
  • the members got worried because he didn’t rehearse with them for a couple of days due to him catching a flu
  • Hansol texted you and said that Yuta is sick so you went to their dorm
  • When you got there, he was sleeping
  • so you asked help from Taeyong and Jaehyun to prepare a meal for him and the other members
  • just as you guys finished cooking, Yuta woke up
  • you brought the soup that you made under Taeyong’s supervision of course to Yuta
  • he was actually surprised and confused that you’re still here
  • you guys talked casually and laughed like nothing bad happened
  • the same kind of chemistry is still there
  • “I still don’t get why we broke up”
  • “I mean, you are the best boyfriend I could ever have.”
  • You were about to cry again and looked at him in the eye, “Am I ugly Yuta?”
  • “Am I exchangeable?”
  • “No, that’s not it (y/n)”
  • “THEN WHY?!”
  • lol MY EX AND WHYS STARRING YOU AND NAKAMOTO YUTA, NOW SHOWING
  • He couldn’t take it anymore and just told you everything from the fact that the company disapproves of your relationship to the day when they asked him to break up with you.
  • you felt relieved that somehow he told you the truth but you wished he could’ve told you sooner so you guys could take some proper measures for it together
  • when he was a lot better, you guys talked to the company and tried to convince them
  • and luckily, they approved it already
  • as long as it doesn’t interfere with Yuta’s obligations to his group
  • Both of you told the other members about this
  • PAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRTTTTTTTAAAAAYYYY
  • “So can I hold your hand again?”
  • You just smiled and intertwine your hand with his
  • “My cheeks are burning”
  • He looks around to see if anyone was looking at the two of you and when he notices that no one’s watching he plants a quick but passionate kiss on your lips
  • everyday you watch him on his rehearsals
  • even on their live shows
  • you even went to one of their fansigns
  • Yuta smiled like there was no tomorrow
  • it’s because he always knew that you were one of his reasons why he loves his work so much
  • YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN HIS INSPIRATION
Clever (Remus x Reader)

A/N: I’m gonna do all the requests, I’m just taking my time cause I don’t want THIS WEEKEND TO END PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME GO BACK TO SCHOOL I’M NOT READY TO BE A SENIOR to make lots of mistakes and cause you to cringe but sorry if I fucked up, I’ll fix it later (if I notice jfc)<3 

Warnings: Blood

Words: 1, 360 holy shit this is long I’m proud??

Prompt: #33 “Oh my gosh is that blood?”


It was one of those nights when you just couldn’t get to sleep, and it was driving you crazy. You had tried everything, but this insomnia was hard to beat.

You moved uncomfortably on your bed, trying to feel better when suddenly you moved too fast and fell, waking up the person beside you.

“Who was it?” she sounded annoyed, you couldn’t blame her really, it was the middle of the night.

“It’s me” you grumbled “I’m sorry Lily, didn’t mean to wake you up”

“Y/n, What are you doing?” Lily whispered.

“I fell off the bed” you admitted slightly embarrassed “I can’t sleep”

“And you decided to knock yourself out?” She chuckled “That’s never the answer, sweetie”

“Haha” you rolled your eyes, she couldn’t see you but you didn’t care “Be careful, you’re starting to sound a lot like James”

“Shut up” she mumbled “just go to the common room and wrap yourself in a blanket, eventually you’ll feel sleepy”

Having no other option, you decided to follow her advice and stood up, grabbing your wand, and a pair of slippers, slowly opening your bedroom door you walked carefully down stairs, having difficulties to find each step in the dark and silently sitting on one of the closest seats to the chimney.

You disappeared under a bunch of blankets and a few minutes later you started to feel sleepy.

You were so tired that didn’t notice when the portrait opened, letting a young, scrawny boy with brown hair and saddened expression in, new cuts adorning his hands, arms and face.

He walked slowly to the chair that was sited in front of you, a low whine escaping his lips, you woke up at the sound, your heart skipping a beat when you realized who were you seeing.

The boy sat there in silence, looking at something in his hands, he frowned and looked away, his stare weak and tired.

You stayed silent, pretty sure that he hadn’t noticed you when he came into the room. Scared to move you watched him in silence, curious to know what he was doing up so late.

Remus Lupin was your favorite classmate (never said that in front of Lily of course) not because he was smart, or good-looking, but because he was kind and supportive, even though you two weren’t friends.

Keep reading

It’s been a long time, w/o u my quotes

-All MY FRIENDS ARE FURRIES TAKE IT SLOOWWW
+i am not your friend
+i am not a furry

‘‘My Mac Daddy Skills are Super Limp’’

‘‘i was just listening to the spice girls and i have to come back to this’’

-I’M CAPABLE OF PLAYING THE FIRST PART OF THE FRENCH ANTHEM IN THE OTAMATONE
+i can’t find my titty holder
+AND THATTS AWESOME
-Why do i use my time for this

-Guess what
+youre gay?
-yes but
-*whispers in your ear * hexaflexagons

-COME ON MC LETS GO ON A ROMANTIC GYM SPREE! I CALL DIBS ON THE TREADMILLS!
-10/10 date ideas
+If when we met u don’t drag me to a date like that I’ll asume u don’t love me
-*crosses the border into spain * come on babe its time to count down those calories and burn that thigh fat
-ok but when you think about the name ‘‘burn your fat with me’’ could mean 2 totally different things like this could be some innocent workout where youre just getting fit or whatever the fuck but this could just as easily be a ‘lets slice off your leg fat and burn it in a sacrifice to satan bc with the power of love anything is possible. and they say romance is dead’ type thing

-I
-Love
+i need all the attention
-You
-bitch accept my love
+i,, eve?
+are you okay
+you just said i love you
-b i t c h accept it
+WHO IS THIS YOURE NOT EVE

‘‘i have multiple friends i refer to as mom in my contacts and then my actual mom and before i was smart and changed the names i nearlt sent a joke to my actual mom about how i wanted to eat her pussy’’

-Shit they saw the window sex aBORT
-THIS IS NOT A DRILL PASSERBYS HAVE SEEN THE DIC K AGAINST THE GLASS
-SI REN NOISE S
+OMFG
-KDVDMSHEKSE AAAAAAAA
-Ripperoni them two
+Dicks? In my window??
-Its more likely than you think

‘‘he gay
the french ones are always gay’’

‘‘I just spammed my mom with middle fingers hi’’

-I’m gonna crawl under a rock and die
-See y’all in hell I guess
+No don’t die
-Too late
-I’m dead inside

-Keiths hard
+hel p i think i saw a blood slurper?
~Keith’s hard
-you ass
-eVE
+pft
-WHATS A BLOOD SLURPER
+SLURRRP
+mosquito ::::::::((((

-‘‘Aritmetic love series’’ the only sadism here is the math
+I knew the hexaflexagons had something to do with all of this
-Math is art
~Math is pain
+Life is pain
-Art is pain
~Art is math
#My hair is a mess
~Life is a mess

‘‘Grandma: ‘‘do you want to die, huh?’’
Me internally: yes absolutely I creve death’’

-Tf did I come back to
+Idek
~we just yelled out the sexual tension
-I’m
-This is underage I’m gonna go
~i called novi a syrup licking cunt
~and he said he would ‘‘tuck my ass in’’ and then we screamed about how we tought the other was pretty

‘‘I am ready to fight a god.’’

‘‘Texas time I’m coming over to hug you
Don’t question how
Just believe in the yeehaw powers’’

-what rhymes with angel
-crangel
-uh
-ladle
-wait no
-langel
+Langel
-LANGEL
-yes
-my name is langel
-it rhymes with
-bangel
-i like to lick
-pineappleangels
-what am i doing with my life
-honestly

‘‘I JUST SNORTED TEA’’

-Kiku stop being so fucking edgy jfc
+I’m so edgy I can cut myself on me
-Oh my god
~Lmao

‘‘*gets fucked real hard up the ass * how much sp did you get just then’’

-Rub salt into my wounds like youre up in the Alaskan wilderness, harvesting meat so you can survive the unforgiving winters and manage not to starve. Pound me and grind me untill Im all fine and then wrap me up in plastic before shoving me in a shed for 4 months and slowly eating my remains until Im non existent
+God damnit, you’re turning me on

-Why is your German boyfriend unaware of the existence of trees
+I don’t know
+maybe it’s a German thing?? Maybe they don’t have trees there,,,

-Young love
-I remember when I was young
+ryan
+I’m a year older than u
-did i fucking stutter

-I’ll just summon a demon on another day uwu
+Eve you are a demon
~Eve is a good demon
-I need to summon an army, baba
-I’ll become the dictator of a country of demons
~#proud

‘‘Why must you yeehaw’’

‘‘yeehaws from europe’’

-yeehaws from south europe
+yeehaws from north-central europe
~stop yeehaws they’re not even a thing here
-Yeehaws are an European thing now guys
+yeehaws in polish
~No they’re not
+yeehaws in eUrOpeaN
+yes they are

‘‘Also mother asked me if I’m looking for my dream priencess on the beach and yes mom thank you I am gay’’

-I need to go to Walmart today
+Get some wasabi peas 4 me
~Ger some edgy candles for me
+Oo ye

-ya like jazz?
+i ducking love jazz
-That’s rude to ducks
+youre rude to ducks
-Duck you
+id duck you so hard, eve
+quack
~God my legs hu- What did i come back to
+oh hi novi why are you awake?
+: )

-oK
-BUT
-if i stay up 2 days with no sleep and then write something 
-how bad can i get
-im already fucking terrible with 1 day of no sleep
-BUT 2 DAYS
-could be interesting
+Ryan you’re gonna stunt your growth
-ive already accepted the fact that im never gonna grow to be a redwood tree

‘‘Been here for 2 seconds and I’ve already destroyed a relationship’’

-Why is post apocalypse Mr. Krabs into bdsm
+why wouldn’t he
~The world is burning,,,,,,,,,,, lets masturbate
-Novi what the actual fuvc
+and they say romance is dead
-It is and you two killed it
+wym we are the most romantic of the romantics sweet and innocent angels
+who did nothing wrong
-Lies
+truths
-No
+get over here you spanish bitch
~I’m already here you American asshole
+we’re proving how romantic we are now shove it up your asshole
~Right after u

-SEIUGFIUEFWHGQE
-EJLEISHDF;.K
-SEKFJ
+Are you okay
-sorry i turned on a hannah montana playlist and nobodys perfect came on
-this was my shIT

-wow
-now baba is really gonna go to jail
-good job novi you idiothole
+shut up Ryan u stupid ass
-you like my stupid ass though
-i just dont like your idiothole
+which one of them
-idk novi why dont you pick you seem to have many holes on your body
+Honestly why are we like this 
(…)
-have you decided which hole is your idiothole yet or are you still trying to count them all to make a decent decision
+Ryan is2g
~lowkey laughing because wtf the fuck guys
+Same tbh
-im just sAYING
(…)
-novi your name is literally ryan fucker
+I’m not cheating on u w/ another ryan
-HOW CAN I BE SURE
-theres a spanish ryan i fucking know it
-gonna kill that bitch
+Nah but my psicologist is called Randall
-psicologist
-what an english you did there
+wh
-psychologist
+AH
+Fuck me up y
-which hole is your y
+rYAN N O
-IT WAS AN H O N E S T QUESTION
+IS2G
-im crying o love annoying you
+Well fucc u then
-which hole
+I’m leaving
-lmfao
~I don’t know whether to cry or laugh at your interactions

-yo evvu
+eve my meme bro
-If eve is ur meme bro
-Then what am I
~pardner
-my bro bro
-meme pardner
~pard n er
-Idk how to feel about this

‘‘idk about you but one of my favorite games when i was 7 was “throw rocks from my driveway at passing cars bc i was raised to be an asshole from birth"’’

‘‘Guys I have resting murder face
I was just chilling looking at my phone and my sister was like ‘‘why do you look like you want to stab someone’’ but ITS JUST MY FACE’’

‘‘Ryan, raised to be a quotable asshole’’

-i am a pure and innocent angel that did nothing wrong
-i was not browsing furries while talking to novi shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
-you have no evidence of this
+Uhuh
-: )
-i was curious so i searched for snep on tumblr and of course furries came up?
-so i had to look for scientific reasons only
-it was a check for quality
-nothing else
~Why am I not even surprised

-Why must you do this every time I leave
+,,,,,,, memes
-Uhuh

‘‘ok hey the space ponies werent my fault’’

‘‘Everyday I descend more into insanity’’

-IGNORE
-THE FACT THAT I WAS RESEARCHING ‘DEER PREGNANCY’
+I diDN’T EVEN LOOK BUT NOW I’M AWARE OF IT

‘‘i mean ive brought it from ‘i love you’ to ‘hey so like do you ever just wanna scream dick at the top of your lungs in public’’’

-I’m gay
+Hi gay
+I’m Baba
~I’m cant

‘‘,,,,,,i licked it is it enough’’

‘‘mother just asked me if i like jazz and i died’’

‘‘quote me up (quote me up inside)’’

Bonus: I asked for last words and they gave me this

@stammi-ravioli  @plushy-eve  @space-asylum  @rolord  @ask-ageswap-viktor  @shitphobe420  @hatelikingbatman  @ask-yoi-viktor-nikiforov  @phantasmagoricalcoffee  @nocturnal-narcissus  @meow-puta  @wanber  @yuuri-on-heelys  @ask-otabek  @ask-ice-family  @nam-nam-joon  @caffeinebeancrock  @rosebud1903

Business (Part 3) (Peter Parker x Reader)

PART 1 | PART 2

I DO NOT OWN THE GIF | WC: 1.412

PROMPT?:  can you write something about peter and reader having a huge fight because he bailed on so many dates for spiderman duties (reader knows he’s spidey) and he finally decides to break up with reader but after a little while he realises that it’s all a mistake??? sorry if this is too much!!! and  Omg is their any way you would do a part 3 too business I’m seriously so in love with this story ! You’re so good at writing !!!

A/N: i’m honestly so glad you guys like Business?? IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY

WARNINGS: argument, break up, cursing, angsty

It was almost laughable how much Jack wanted to be on double dates with you and Peter. Sure, the jock could get any girl he wanted (except you, but that’s another story) but for some reason, he swore to stick to your friend group. And since you were out of the question, it led him to Marie, who was definitely not laughing at the jock’s attempts. She groaned practically almost every time he called their “single date with two friends” a double date and she eagerly pushed his prying arm off her shoulder. Today’s outing at the diner was no different. “Marie, look! They’re on a date! Why can’t we be on a date! We’ve known each other forever, come on, we’re best friends-” Jack groaned, pouring his heart out to the small black-haired girl he so recently began actually pining over her. You and Peter sat on the other side of booth snickering to each other. With Pete’s arm around your shoulder, you were content watching Jack’s attempts to catch the girl you had been friends with for so long. “1. We met in Stats class six months ago. 2. Yes, we’re best friends but-” Marie’s eyes met yours and something plummeted in your heart, something was wrong. There was an apologizing sense in her demeanor and when she turned back to Jack, your body went cold. “You know how often Pete ditches (y/n)? I’m not down to be bailed on 24/7.” And with that, she up and left with a shrug and one more apologizing look, tucking her textbook back in her bag. It wasn’t until the bell on the door rang, signifying she had walked out, that you felt how tense Peter was. And how your heart rate had skyrocketed in mere seconds. You felt sick to your stomach. “Are you okay, (y/n)? Don’t listen to her, she’s just mad that I-” Jack tried to apologize and numbingly, you felt Pete’s arm fall from your shoulder as you walked up and out of your booth, and making the same sound Marie did as she walked out. 

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Could you explain why you think the Kiera Knightly Pride and Prejudice is best? I want to know why you like it so much.

  • PAN TO: lizzie taking shelter from the rain with like dramatic violin music playing and BAM theres darcy he just comes in, soaking wet and is like MISS ELIZABETH and lizzie gaSPS
  • darcy just like powers thru and goes [rushed] i have struggled in vain and i can bear to no longer. these past months have been a torment – i came to rosings with the single object of seeing you, i had to see you. i have fought against my better judgement, my family’s expectation, the inferiority of your birth, my rank and circumstance – all these things im willing to put aside and ask you TO END MY AGONY
  • and lizzie is like i dont understand and darcy just fucking comes out iwth it
  • i love you. most. ardently. [LONG PAUSE OF SILENCE EXCEPT FOR RAIN]. please do me the honor of excepting my hand.
  • [LONGER, MORE AWKWARD SILENCE WITH RLY LOUD RAIN WHERE DARCY LOOKS SCARED AND LIZZIE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE JUST PUNCHED HER]
  • and then lizzie is like… this guy..this fukcing guy.. the AUDACITY… oh ymgood and fukcing stiff as hell goes
  • SIR….. i appreciate the struggle you have been through and i am sorry to have caused you pain. believe me it was unconsciously done.
  • [AWKWARD SILENCE WHERE DARCY LOOKS VERY SAD AND CONFUSED]
  • …… are you LAUGHING at me ????????
  • [shortly] no.
  • and now darcy looks like a lil pissed and hes like: are you REJECTING me??????? (cmon darcy jfc)
  • and lizzie is like FUCK BEING POLITE IM FUCKING DONE
  • [talking rly fast bc shes pissed] im sure the feelings which you’ve told me have hindered ur regard will help u in overcoming it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • and then there is another silence where darcy evidently realizes that he fucked up and he goes back to trying to be polite
  • perhaps, i might inquire, with such indeverant (??? i have no idea what word he says there it sounds like indeverant) civilly i am repulsed????  
  • but lizzie is NOT HAVING IT and she fukcing is all AND I MGIHT AS WELL INQUIRE WHY WITH SUCH AN EVIDENT DESIGN OF INSULTING ME YOU CHOSE TO TELL ME YOU LIKED ME AGAINST YOUR BETTER JUDGMENT???????????
  • and darcy literally is like :o so lizzie just KEEPS GOING WITH THE PUNCHES
  • IF I WAS UNCIVIL THAT IS SOME EXCUSE BUT I HAVE OTHER REASONS – YOU KNOW I HAVE !!!
  • and darcy goes in this like, small, confused voice: what reasons?
  • and lizzie looks at him like HES A FUCKING IDIOT and in the most DISGUSTED VOICE I HAVE EVER HEARD IN MY WHOLE LIFE
  • did you think that i would accept the hand of the man who has ruined perphaps FOREVER the happiness of a most beloved sister???????
  • and darcy is like …. o shit
  • and lizzie is like still fukcing going like do you deny it mr. darcy????? that you SEPARATED a young couple who loved each other exposing my sister something something something caprice??? disapointed hopes…. and involving them both in misery of the acutest kind
  • and darcy all stiffly is like i do not deny it
  • and lizzie is like all agahst like HOW COULD YOU DO IT???
  • and darcy is all like wELL  i believed your sister to be indifferent
  • lizzie just in the most are-you-fukcing-kidding-me voice goes INDIFFERENT??????
  • and darcy is like trying to backtrack now but its too late so hes like i watched them very carefully and perceived his attachment was greater than hers
  • THATS BECAUSE SHES SHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • [getting heated now] bingley too is modest and was persuaded that she didnt feel strongly for him!!!!!!!
  • because you suggested it
  • [LOUD YELLING NOW] I DID IT FOR HIS OWN GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!
  • [SCREAMING] MY SISTER HARDLY SHOWS HER TRUE FEELINGS TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • [awkward silence where they both are fuming]
  • and lizzie just adds fuel to the flames by being like i suppose you thought her lack of fortune had something do to with it!!
  • and darcy is like cMON!! no!!!! i wouldnt pay you sister the dishonor!!! though it was suggested …..
  • he trails off but lizzie is not letting it go and lizzie is like what was???
  • and darcy pauses but hten is like fuck it!!!!!! it was made perfectly clear that an advantageous marriage would be made
  • DID MY SISTER GIVE THAT IMPRESSION?????
  • no!!!!!! but there was the issue of your family
  • lizzie is like tlaking thru her teeth now she is so angry out of what connection??? mr bingley didnt seem to vex himself about that –
  • – no it was more than that –
  • [gritted teeth] how sir
  • IT WAS THE LACK OF PROPRIETY SHOWN BY YOUR MOTHER, YOUR THREE YOUNGER SISTERS, AND EVEN ON OCCASION YOUR FATHER!!!!!!!!!!!
  • [silence where lizzie just stares at him open-mouthed, darcy realizes that he totally fucked up more, attempts to make amends]
  • forgive me… you and your sister i must exclude from this
  • then lizzie decides that SHE IS GOING TO HIT HIM WHERE IT HURTS and she goes….. and what about mr. wickhman?
  • and darcy fucking STEPS CLOSER TO HER AND GOES IN THE MOST DANGEROUS TONE EVER USED BY ANYONE EVER: mister wickham?
  • he told me of his misfortunes –
  • [SARCASTIC, READY TO MURDER SOMEONE] oh yES his “””””””misfortunes””””””””” have been very great inDEEd
  • you ruined his chances and yet you treat him with sarcasm –
  • at this point, this is probably the worst day of darcys whole entire life and he is SEETHING and he fucking spits out so this is your opinion of me?????? THANK you for explaining so FULLY. perhaps these offenses might have been overlooked if your pRIDe –
  • MY PRIDE???!?1/!??!?!?!?!??!?!?!? –
  • – hadn’t been hurt by admitting scruples about our relationship!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [they are almost chest to chest now, darcys eyes are wet with tears or rain ((tears)) and he looks livid] [deepest, angriest, most scathing tone ever] do you except me to rejoice in the inferiority of your birth???
  • [lizzie, looking at him straight in the eye, also livid, about to deliver the greatest smackdown in human history] and those are the words of a gentleman!!!!!!!!! from the first moment i met you youR ARROGANCE AND CONCEIT, YOUR SELFISH DISTAIN FOR THE FEELINGS OF OTHERS MADE ME REALIZE YOU WERE THE LAST MAN IN THE WORLD I COULD EVER BE PREVAILED UPON TO MARRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • [lizzie breathes heavily, leans in closer to him], [darcy moves in until they are a breath apart] [lizzie’s eyes are hooded and go down to stare at his lips]  and thEN at the LAST SECOnd [darcy moves back]
  • [most dramatic tone ever] forgive me, madam, for taking up so much of your time……………. [turns dramatically, struts away]
  • [lizzie leans against the wall of the building to catch her breath after the most emotionally and sexually charged conversation in history]
TVD 7x12 Review {SPOILERS}

So I completely forgot that today is Thursday until people were in my inboxes talking about TVD shit I had no idea about and I was like OH RIGHT IT’S THURSDAY, which also means that Scandal and HTGAWM is back on so HAHA but those links aren’t up yet so let me do this TVD review. To those who don’t like to read my complaints or my rants or my unapologetic anti-Damon/Delena opinions … you do not have to read this, it’s honestly THAT simple. Again, I write this in real-time so if I say something that isn’t correct I may have rectified my mistake further down the post. All right let’s go.

1. Watching the recap like, but really, Klaus — er, I mean Julian — just turned MF into the Fast and the Furious! Also considering that Stefan and Damon have been alive for over a hundred years, how have they not heard of the Huntress? And as one of my followers asked, is the Huntress really just Buffy?

2.  A car is driving down an empty road, I bet Damon is going to be lying in the middle of it.

3. Oh look. Damon is lying in the middle of it.

4. OK but WOW has Ian aged. And the problem with how they’re doing Damon’s freakout over the fact that he thinks he killed Elena (because let’s be honest, JP and CD would never make Damon torch Elena; Tyler was going to shoot Damon because he thought Damon would discover that Elena wasn’t in the coffin) but the problem with this freakout is that I get that they’re trying to make Damon in shock, like so in shock to the point that he can’t be turning over tables and drinking and destroying shit because he simply can’t believe he did that so he’s actually “calm” but when you do something like that, there’s a removal, like Damon’s eyes should be dead, he should be speaking monotonously, like he should be SO far removed that it’s like he’s experiencing a psychological break. What’s happening is that Damon just sounds like he doesn’t give a shit.

5. And herein lies the problem with Defan and Delena. Damon says that he can’t imagine caring about anyone ever again and to make sure that that point hits home he says “not a single solitary soul” he doesn’t even say besides my brother and that’s why Defan is not a true ship to me because Stefan would, will and has sacrificed everything for Damon and all Damon can see is Elena so how exactly did Elena make him a better person when he just gets more selfish when he’s with her? The beauty of Stelena was that loving Elena led Stefan back to loving Damon and loving Stefan led Elena back to being a supportive friend and good sister, they grew with each other and made each other better people. Delena is actually the WORST for both Damon AND Elena.

6.  Wow, Damon killed the driver and we couldn’t even see any blood splatter on the windows, guys? Jeez, are you just allergic to stakes?

7.  VERY cute that Stefan got Caroline fries for her cravings. I’ve wanted to see something like that all season. I like that they pecked each other on the lips. All the makings of a cute couple-y scene are here  but … but … but … you know, I just don’t buy them as a couple. This still felt very friendly to me. Maybe because when the baby is kicking so hard and Caroline  is in visible pain, I mean, Stefan looks concerned but I mean, rush over to her, hold her, put your hand on her stomach, say she should go to the hospital, like it still seems very half-assed and muted, which is a problem with the entire show in general but I just know that Boyfriend Stefan would’ve said more or done more or acted more if it were Elena and if the writers were DIFFERENT.

8. Matt and Penny do not have chemistry. Stop it.

9. Of course Julian doesn’t miss when he shoots an apple off a human’s head. You know what would’ve shown what a “villain” he is? If he didn’t miss and then shot the human anyway for shits and giggles. But nah, why have danger and twisted things happen, I mean, it is only a vampire show.

10. Wait, Bonnie and Enzo are supposed to end up together, right? I mean, I’m not complaining that he hasn’t been in episodes lately because who the fuck cares about Enzo but I do find it typical that the writers are less than half-assing Bonnie’s love story.

11. You need to protect them? WHY BONNIE? WHEN HAVE THEY EVER PROTECTED YOU? JFC. I need someone to get Julie Plec and Caroline Dries in a room and make them explain in detail with powerpoint and cue cards why the fuck Bonnie NEEDS to protect her ungrateful ass friends.

12. Damon’s “descent” is so terrible.

13. Can’t Stefan kiss Caroline on the forehead or something?

14. You went “off the rails” when Lily died, Julian? HOW? WHAT ARE YOU DOING THAT IS SO CRAZY AND TERRIBLE AND INSANE? DRAG RACING DOES NOT QUALIFY AS GOING OFF THE RAILS.

15. It doesn’t even look like Julian is choking Damon, it legit looks like Julian is just holding his neck. Damon isn’t even struggling to speak.

16. I’m more than upset that Bonnie is clearly a pawn to make Mary-Louise jealous.

17. And since WHEN was Bonnie so petty? Oh that’s right, she wasn’t.

18. LOL pregnant Caroline is like pregnant Bella. Julie, please NEW IDEAS.

19. So Julian and Damon are basically a poor man’s Klaus and Stefan. Got iT.

20. Here is the thing about Mystic Falls going to shit. It really doesn’t feel like it’s going to shit, I don’t see paranoia or fear or sheer terror (and I’m also kind of confused because I thought the residents were compelled to LEAVE the town) what they should have is like season 1 The Walking Dead or season 1 True Blood where there’s mass panic and Julian and his cronies are feeding off of that and terrorizing everyone. Everything is too neat. Too isolated. It doesn’t feel like the town is overrun.

21. Caroline and Valerie have more chemistry than Stefan and Caroline, which is hilarious to me.

22. See when Valerie tells Stefan that Damon decapitated one of Julian’s friends and that it seems like Damon had a death wish, we really should’ve seen Stefan be over it, like he would still go but a resigned “of course” or a sigh, like that was what they were going for but it didn’t work out, like Stefan should be visibly irritated or nihilistic or tired. In Sons of Anarchy, hey do it well with Jax and Gemma. Jax is having a fine time and his friends are like “hey, so Gemma did xyz” and Jax hangs his head and is like “Jesus CHRIST” and walks out the room

23. This fight to the death thing is actually really boring. They’re VAMPIRES. When they’re punching each other like blood splatter, broken teeth, and healing, defanging, SOMETHING.

24. And honestly, Bonnie confronting Nora that she’s using Bonnie to make Mary-Louise jealous isn’t a confrontation because Bonnie is like “go help her look for her” it’s resigned and her “I’m tired of being in the middle of it” should actually be “I know you only brought me here to make her jealous but this isn’t a game to me, the huntress is coming after my friends and I want to find her so I’m tired of being in the middle of whatever it is between you two so just go, kiss and make up so we can get back to work” *stalks off* like it’s NOT hard to give Bonnie Bennett some fucking agency.

25. I mean NONE of their shirts are even bloody but this is supposed to be a harsh brutal fight to the death?

26. This reminds me, Stefan did this WAY better when he got into bar fights and let strangers beat him up to feel pain and he would laugh and egg them on. Lol sorry Paul just surpasses Ian’s acting when he tries. Ijs. It really BOTHERS me that their shirts are hardly bloody.

27. Lol when Damon says he’s “in” and goes back to the ring I’d be like pfft fine, I’m done.

28. I bet Stefan punches Damon to knock him out so he won’t go back into the ring and that the promos lied to SErs to get their hopes up that he punched Damon over Elena.

29. Oh look Enzo magically shows up and saves Bonnie because THAT’S NOT CONVENIENT.

30. LOL JULIAN IS ACTUALLY A POOR MAN’S KLAUS. I CAN’T BE THE ONLY WHO SEES IT. “I never had a brother” and he has his friends who are like his hybrids. LMFAO.

31. So why can’t Valerie kill Julian with magic tho?

32. THEY MADE HIM DO IT. YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. First of all, Stefan trying not to cry when he finds out Elena is “dead” is the MOST emotive I’ve seen Paul since he had his “Jacob” dream and I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you can see how much he cares and loves Elena in that facial expression and him punching Damon?? OMG MY STELENA FEELS.

33. They better not ruin it by making Stefan be like ‘I’m mad because you screwed yourself, Damon’ like if they make Stefan’s anger over Elena about his sadness that Damon lost Elena I will be PISSED.

34. OH MY GOD STEFAN IS CRYING. HE BEATS UP HIS CAR. OMGOMGOMGOGMOMGOMGOGMOMGOMGOMGOGMOGMG. I wish my imovie still worked THE VIDS I WOULD MAKE.

35. Go the fuck AWAY Valerie.

36. I mean they sort of make Stefan’s sadness about Elena about Damon by making him say that Julian destroyed Damon but like I’m just saying, it was Elena’s death that got Stefan to say he doesn’t want be to the smart one anymore. OH MY GOD.

37. Matt and whatsherface DO NOT HAVE CHEMISTRY. But I do like that he has someone tell him that he’s brave and cute because Matt doesn’t get that a lot. But I’m also mad that Matt gets a whole new character who hasn’t wanted anyone else on the show and Bonnie gets Enzo The Irrelevant who was insanely in love with Lily or she’s a pawn for Nora and Mary-Louise. And the only person who was interested in her and intrigued by her and wanted her from the get-go was Kai so obviously he had to die.

38. Nora’s “and what if I did [like Bonnie]? She’s beautiful and smart and loyal” but she still chooses Mary-Louise sums up the entire problem with TVD and the writing of Bonnie’s character because she IS all of those things and she’s never chosen first. Ever. And if she is chosen it’s always a struggle. And the show actually insults her again by making Nora characterize these things about Bonnie but have that look of incredulity on her face like “How could I like Bonnie despite her being all these things”? Every chance the writers get to stick it to Bonnie and put her in her “place” they do it.

39. YO STEFAN GOING ROGUE BECAUSE ELENA “DIED” IS … LIKE … OMG. HE DOES IT BETTER THAN DAMON.

40. So the Huntress is actually like a Phoenix then. Ehh.

41. Lol Matt vervaining Stefan. Remember when he would drink vervain every day to build up his tolerance? OK.

42. The “three years from now” reveal isn’t a reveal so I don’t get what’s up with this music because we already saw who the Huntress was in the scene before and it’s not like she was anyone we knew from the past so I don’t care enough to have a connection to her and Damon is tied up and Stefan is apparently vervained and that isn’t an exciting revelation.

This episode was actually pretty stagnant like all of the episodes this season, I have no idea what the show is trying to accomplish, what exactly we’re leading up, what the central theme is, but at least it gave me my Stelena feels.

EXO REACTION TO THEIR S/O ORGANISING A BDAY PARTY FOR THEM

requested by anon

KAI

*He was so caught up in practising for the new comeback he didn't have any time to think about his birthday. You were well aware of this and so got all the guys together threw up some decorations, got a nice cake and decided to surprise him as he walked into the dance studio. Suho gt a bit out of hand and scared kai out of his wits as he walked in that he almost knocked over the cake*

Y/N: “Jfc Suho did we not learn anything from that broadcast??”

Originally posted by jonginssoo

SEHUN

*He was so touched (bc Sehuns all emotional like that) that he almost started crying as all of his friends had gathered to do this for him, they had been thinking about him when he hadn't been thinking about himself at all. Later on he became the life of the party along with Baek, body rolling all over the dance floor*

Originally posted by angel-in-slow-motion

SUHO

*You wanted to share the moment with all the fans that loved Suho so much just like you and the members. When you all surprised him you made sure to catch it all on V app, and after havign a short broadcast of everyone going on about how great Suho was you ended up to turn up the real party with everyone*

S: “I can’t believe you organised this for me..wait actually I can bc your literally the best person I've ever met”

Y/N: “Stop complimenting me, it’s your birthday i should be complimenting you”

Originally posted by 12fools

CHANYEOL

*You hadn't see Chanyeol in a month due to you both having packed schedules that there was no time to fly over to see each other. But you weren't going to miss his birthday and so the members helped arrange a surprise. They led him into a room with a huge present box and told him to wait. He did and saw you pop out of it which made him so happy, as well as you. You made sure to give him another present later but according to him being with you was enough*

Originally posted by fyeah-chanyeol

BAEKHYUN

*He noticed something was going on bc the members looked a bit off but everyttime he asked they wouldn't tell him. As he walked into the dorm with the others everyone burst out from behind sofas and from different rooms leaving his wide eyed with shock. You were in the centre with the biggest smile ever and ran over to join a group hug with all the boys. He spen th night having fun and sprinkling confetti everywhere*

Y/N: “You having fun with all that confetti?”

BH: “Yeah you should get used to it to since it will all over us on our wedding day”

smooth motherfuxker

Originally posted by sefuns

D.O

*ksoo really didn't expect everyone to jump out so when Baek jumped in his face his initial reaction turned to self defence, and then half apologising and laughing once he accidentally hit him in the face*

BH: “I help y/n throw this nice party for you and what do I get? Abuse.

Originally posted by v-dyo

CHEN

*the members had thrown him a huge party but unbeknown to Chen you were actually the one who threw it and you intended to surprise him. He was video chatting you telling you how much he wished you could be there until he realised o camera that you were walking into the same room as him*

Y/N: “Surprise!”

*He turned and gave you the biggest hug he could muster, because now his birthday just got even better*

Originally posted by chenmorningstar98

TAO

*Was so engrossed on the making of his new album (lit) that he didn’t even really bother about his birthday, but you on the other hand were. if he wasn’t going to come out of the studio then you were going to have to bring the party to him. Plenty of friends and cake made his day and the fact your organised it made it even better*

T: “y/n this is the best cake i have ever eaten you know*

HE IS SOOO CUTE *UGLY SOBS*

Originally posted by asdfghjklool

LAY

*He was in China doing solo promotions and you wanted him to have all his friends around him for his birthday, so you spoke to exo who all secretly flew out to China, and you also spoke to his go fighting members to make sure they were all there as well. He walked back into his hotel room to find everyone he loved there, including you*

This gif is jokes

Originally posted by jonnasexoticworld

KRIS

*You had both attended a night out for a special event, but you had planned the after party to be focused on Kris and so thats what you arranged. Once the even twas over and the after party started about 20 minutes in everyone started singing happy birthday to him. He got all embarrassed and tried to hide behind your shoulder but still loved that you had arranged this all the same*

K: “This is such a great end to my birthday y/n. Thank you”

Originally posted by hyung-bi

LUHAN

*Every one jumping out at him scared the crap out of him, not to mention the party poppers too, but once he got over that initial shock he was overwhelmed by everyone who had turned up to celebrate with him. He found out you were the one that made this happen*

L: “Thanks for my gift y/n , I’ll be sure to give you your one tonight ;)”

Y/n: Jfc luhan can you stop making sex jokes for 1 second”

Originally posted by wooyoung

XIUMIN

*was bewildered at first as everyone jumped out thiking ‘woah is this really for me’. You saw the look on his face and came up to him*

Y/N: “yes xiu this is for you obviously..i mean it isn’t for Robert living down the road is it”

*had a great time and thanked you for arranging this for him, especially since he had been feeling tired lately so it was nice to let loose and have fun with everyone he loved*

Originally posted by baekhyuntella

Its a bit different to the title but oh well i guess

6

Today was another busy day at another doujinshi event! More specifically, the second Nagisa Approach at Zero Hour, or the Rei and Nagisa only event! Right next to us was the second uke!Rin only event, but…. Er.

Anyway, I went with paranormowl and jap-year bright and early! Maybe too bright and early. We got there at 8:30 a.m…… Around 10 or so, sunyshore joined our party! (The event didn’t start until 11 a.m. lol)

In the end, I bought 36 books. Exactly 2/3 of those 36 books are personal purchases though. Jfc, I really did not hold back at all today. ORZ

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi! Can I request headcanons where in MC is actually a sibling of another rfa member. RFA + V :)

Oh my gosh!! It’s happening everyone, it’s happening! I’m wheezing, I hope I please everyone, please go easy on me for this is my first time doing something like this for this fandom!

This is a very cute ask, by the way! I wrote it as gender neutral as I could, if there’s specific pronouns you’d like for me to use, please specify! The most gender-specific I got was on Zen’s, hope you don’t mind…

Keep reading

you’re going to regret this but LOLZ ASK AND YE SHALL RECEIVE let me show you how much of a sugakookie creeper I am.

I clearly have too much time on my hands *sobs* if anyone has any other sugakookie moments to add, please let me know~          

Alright, so this is what I got from Bitty’s tweets...

9/5 - Fueled by the magic of tub juice, Dex and Nursey hook up. Bitty is both shocked and impressed, clutching his hands to his chest as he drunkenly watches them get sloppy.

9/7 - Bitty attempts to talk to his frogs to piece together how they are doing (like, y’all, Bitty was certain that Dex was straight (granted, Bitty has spent like, the bare minimum of time around Dex bc 1. Bitty has a secret bf; and 2. Dex is constantly fixing shit and studying and chirping Nurse… they are busy boys). Dex is struggling and shuts down Bitty’s attempts at hospitality (”I just don’t get it, Jack… it’s not like I welcomed him to the ‘gay neighborhood’”… “Was there special pie?” “Oh, lord.” “Heh.”) and when he tries to talk to Nursey, Nurse informs him that he already has a mother. Bitty is deeply insulted. 

9/7 continued - Lured out of the basement (fuckin’ dryer) by the sweet sweet smell of pie, Dex sits down and realizes that shit. Even though he loves all the guys at the table, there’s no one that he can really… talk to. Because, he’s maybe a little less confused than he thought he would be, which just… confuses him further, and just… he really misses Shitty. From the gobsmacked looks on everyone’s faces, it’s clear that he said that part out loud. When Nursey comes into the kitchen, he scuttles away back to his dorm room and bites the bullet - and, he skypes Shitty. And immediately hangs up on Shitty when he thanks him for ‘trusting him with the moment’ (”You literally say that to everyone, man, shut the hell up.”). 

SOMETIME BETWEEN 9/7 and 9/10: Dex stops running when Nursey trys to talk to him… and they talk. And then, they talk. A lot. So much, jfc boys, pull up for air… shaaaaaaaaaaaaaaameful…

9/10 continued - At team dinner, Chowder asks if Nursey’s gonna be around to watch this awesome documentary on sharks with him, only to be informed that Nursey’s gonna be busy with ‘some Netflix and chill’. Chowder, sweet precious angel baby that Bitty thinks he is, is thrilled, because he loves Netflix.

9/10 continued… again - Dex makes a complicated face at Nursey over Chowder’s shoulders, and that’s it, Nursey just… fuckin’ starts cackling… and that’s when his Powerade goes spilling all over the place… and his face is just perfect priceless, and Dex can’t stop laughing - snorting and gasping and god - that just sets off Chowder, and they are a mess.

9/10 - But then Nursey shoots a private smile over at Dex… and yeah, Dex isn’t nearly as confused as he thought he would be.

9/16 - Bitty, though easily distracted, is nothing if not persistent, which is why he still tries to make sure that Dex and Nursey know that he’s always available if they need to talk… as long as it’s not during the weekends that he’s away… or in the middle of a Falconers games… or the exact moment a pie needs to come out of the oven… It’s amazing how similar the frogs are in the way they roll their eyes at him, and from the way Dex tells Bitty to chill… oh, lord. Maybe he does “mother” too much…

9/24 - So, it turns out that maybe Bitty was less onto something with Dex and Nursey than he thought… he had hoped that maybe something would come of their drunken hookup (bc Bitty loves them… and also, it was really, really hot to watch), but there they are… chirping and fighting and lord, those boys…

9/24 continued - WELL, NEVERMIND! Bitty will never question his detective skills again, because Dex and Nursey were holDING HAnDS on their way out of Faber and it was sO CUTE!

10/2 - After nearly a full month, Bitty finally gets his validation when Nursey and Dex come to dinner together, leaning into each other’s space, fingers tangled and just… looking like fools in love. Apparently they’re dating, and apparently they’ve been waiting to tell the team in case it exploded before it started… And maybe it’s just Bitty, but as he looks around the table, he comes to realize that it really feels like they’re all starting to date… each other… One in four, maybe more indeed.

Why I Chill

Warnings: Craziness, profanity, and me being a meanie. May offend TONS of people but I won’t respond.

About: Why I’m chill despite being SS.

Disclaimer: these are MY thoughts on the matter. Its not to spark a debate. Its only me expressing my interpretation of things.

1. What I looked for that gave me said ‘chill’:

* The kids in 700 are acting very differently than in 701+

Its like they were drawn by someone who didn’t even read 700.

-Boruto is suddenly cool with his dad.

-Inojin is bipolar “rude/polite”

-ChouChou wants to lose weight when she dgaf in 700.

-Sarada going from 'Shannnarrroo’ Daddy’s girl to 'I never met my dad’

-Shikadai less 'troublesome’

The sneaking of ASS and even ANH theories into it (did y'all take a good look at what Boruto was REALLY hiding under and a certain anti NH theory?)

*How everything fits all anti headcanon theory and shits on all of Naruto manga… I wouldn’t be surprised if a fucking narsak genjutsu theory-esque theme appears too. (-_-)

*Sakura seeming somehow oblivious about her own husband, having an outburst that made Sarada cry, hiding Karin’s face under her picture, and passing out which is an alleged 'tendency’ of hers from an early age all of the sudden aka OCC af.

*Don’t get me started on the UCHIHA emblem overload in the chap… And how the fuck is Sasuke gonna be Boruto’s 'master’ in the movie when he looks like he’s been stuck in the woods away from his family for 12 years?

*Crimson flower/moon/spring and looool “Road to Boruto”. Look good at the covers.

*Literally every ASS theory are proven wrong with time while we’re proven right. Besides said 'theories’ are so ridiculous that I don’t see why fellow shippers are worried enough to believe them for a second (also y'all should stop with the crosstagging to 'prove’ them wrong since it can come off as desperate and I do have followers from other ships that literally invite me to their tag to see how bad it is)

I can go on but it’d be too long.

And no I’m not putting in doubt that Kishi did this. I have no doubt that he did it.

2. ASS:

*Since November, ASSes have had a field day harassing not only us, but Kishi and his assistant in both twitter and the disgusting SK/NS smut spam in the 'Thank You’ page. It got bad enough that Kishi’s assistant had to tweet in English about how this is KISHI’S story.

*Kishi has literally taken a dump on NS. He laughed and loved watching romantic NS burn in The Last during Sakura’s and Naruto’s conversation about 'love’ that destroyed this ship. Its one of his FAVORITE scenes in the movie.

*The VA’s confirmation of SS planned canon and their own comments reducing NS to a family bond, and SK to 'comrades’ and impossible.

*Kishi’s evident dislike of Karin in his writing. Its sad, but he didn’t once showed he cared about her. He could have done her some justice yet… Nope, he just reduced her and even compared her to hemorrhoids. I don’t think he’d give a character like Karin what she wants in a manga about 'friendship/redemption’ when she never showed any positive change.

*The most recent interview reaffirming Sarada’s parentage despite GAIDEN putting it into question *points above at the inconsistencies of Gaiden*

*The lack of SS in advertising despite said interview.

*Kishi voicing thinking of doing something regarding Sasuke’s POV and wanting Sakura to be happy.

Is this all becoming clearer to y'all? How purposely misleading it ALL is?

3. Fandom…

Jfc. *facepalm*

SS that praised Kishi are now anti-Kishi, taking a very ASS stance. Reason why I don’t take this stance…?

ASSes who HATED Kishi are kissing his ass now for how “awwssum” Gaiden is.

I hate hypocrisy. I won’t hate on the guy UNTIL after I’m proven wrong in my assumptions of him, because this whole “Kishi is the best!!!” to “Kishi is an asshole!!!” could possibly make me look like what I hate.

I’m not praising or hating him, but if I’m proven wrong, I’ll join the bandwagon; I’m just gonna wait till the very end.

You know, SS fandom always gets criticised for getting Sasuke’s character wrong… I always thought ASS had him even worse… How bad it is to see anti-Sasuke all over the place now.

SS shippers have a right to be upset and look at things differently from others. Don’t tear them down, especially if you are a fellow shipper. I’ve had people in my ask trying to convince me into the hate train and I’m not sorry to tell you: I’m too much of an old hag to have some kid brainwashing me. Hilariously enough said kid jumped ship to NS after badgering me. How ironic…

If you hate it, good. Hate it along with people that hate it, but don’t try to force the ENTIRE fandom into doing so. (I’m only mentioning this because of the brat that attempted this stupid shit with me on the first day of Gaiden’s release since my 'calm’ pissed them off)

Also: the JP fandom knows ALOT more about us than we know of them. They also know a lot about western antis and the fandom in tumblr. At least the JP SS and NS shippers I talk to do despite me keeping quiet about it until they ask “Is it true that the foreign fans on tumblr…? etc,”.

If they know that… What makes you think Kishi doesn’t know despite the hate in the Thank You page and his assistant’s tweet… especially now since the huge blowout on November?

I don’t doubt that he NOW knows.

Ending rant… Tehehe… Hi to the antis stalking my blog! UvU

My I’ve had like 15 NS/SK following me in the last 2 days and my posts being screenied… What an awesome time to be alive.( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I thought Gaiden was GOOD for them, but apparently they’re worried for some reason. Lmao

Precision || Sterek || 1, 379

So this is Jamie’s (@okamiaki) fault. They wanted dance AU and porn and like I ONLY DELIVERED ON ONE IM SO SORRY. JFC. What is this. I don’t even know. Here have ballet teacher Derek and ballet butcherer Stiles written by someone who can’t dance to save her life.

The first time Derek sees him dance; he scoffs. The music - a ridiculous beat - pushes his body into his movements and it angers Derek. He has rhythm but his hands linger, they’re sloppy. 

It’s irritating. 

He’s not supposed to be here, Laura’s class finished more than half an hour ago and Derek’s was about to start. He doesn’t teach beginners and this boy is most definitely a beginner. 

Derek doesn’t think about the harsh swirl of his hips that night and the way long hands ran over his pale thighs.

-

Keep reading

25 Thoughts on 7x05

1. That Bonenzo kiss was … I mean, I don’t really have much to say about it, it could’ve been worse I guess but it mostly made me laugh because this comes out of absolutely NOWHERE. At least give us breadcrumbs of interactions between the two of them that make that scene seem earned and not just “Well we needed to make Enzo relevant and I guess it’s time to give Bonnie another love interest, hmm, let’s just put the two of them together!” When you have breadcrumb interactions and then a reveal you can still be surprised like OMG and go “Oh true.” Like Mondler. Monica and Chandler have scenes from season 1 that are breadcrumb thinly romantic interactions from the fact that he was the one willing to pee on her leg because of the jellyfish to her teaching him how to please his girlfriend to their deal to get married if neither one of them find anyone at thirty so that when they’re in bed together during Ross’ wedding you’re like OMGOMGOMG but OH WAIT YEAH MAKES SENSE. That did NOT happen here. 

2. The writers or directors or producers or whoever seem to be obsessed with the “viewing-a-kiss-through-window” shot this season. Like they did it with Stelena in season 2 and that was cute and they did it again with SC this season and now once more with Bonenzo this past episode. Like there’s a voyeurism fetish happening here and I need someone to dissect why because LOL. 

3. ALARIC COULD NOT JUST BECOME A PROFESSOR AGAIN. He was DEAD. He had a social security number, death certificate, etc. etc. you can’t just waltz back into your old life. At least MENTION the shit he had to go through to get back to his life. My God. 

4. So basically every woman Stefan sleeps with on the show, lays awake the next morning basking in the glory of having had sex with Stefan Salvatore and I think that’s hilariously sweet and awesome and a testament to not only how good Stefan must be in bed but what it means to each woman. Katherine actually silently giggled. Caroline just wanted to wake him up and do it again. Elena watched him sleep in season 2 and in season 1 she had the biggest grin on her face being in his arms and then refused to let him go to school. Rebekah well she was still asleep when Stefan tried to sneak out but later on that episode she was worried he regretted it so I mean, let’s just take a moment to appreciate what a stallion Stefan must be in the sack. 

5. Also Damon coming in and interrupting a Steroline moment is exactly like when he came in and interrupted Stelena in season 1, which makes me roll my eyes because CHOOSE DIFFERENT SCENES, WRITERS but it also makes me wonder if Damon secretly knows that these women (all of whom have slept with him too) actually prefer Stefan in bed than him and he’s salty so he passive  aggressively interrupts them. 

6. The writers constantly making Stefan and Caroline say “girlfriend” and “boyfriend” is so transparent. We get it. They’re together.

7. LOL Stefan’s “That’s interesting” to Damon’s ramble about his love for Elena is a PERFECT shot of what I look and sound like every time the writers shove Delena down our throats.

8. They keep talking about “don’t underestimate Lily” “she’s relentless” “she’s stern” HOW? HOOOOOOW? I’ve seen NOTHING. 

9. There is NO CHEMISTRY between Valerie and Stefan. 

10. Bonnie asking Caroline if there’s still a half naked male beneath the sheets … I mean you don’t need to take ALL your clothes off to have sex, this is true, but it just makes me laugh at how they’re censoring this. Can’t they just say naked? Like can’t Stefan have just been fully naked with Caroline in her bed since they were having. sex. I mean they’re 21!

11. OK this talk was supposed to be about how Bonnie needs some D and it became about Caroline and her relationship with Stefan. Did not take long for her to become the new Elena. 

12. I like how Valerie was Stefan’s first true love and yet Damon actually doesn’t know much about their relationship. OK WRITERS. 

13. Again with the talking. Valerie tells us Julian massacred an entire town. Doesn’t have the same punch if we don’t see him being sadistic. Like why is this so hard for people to understand?

14. That scene with Valerie and Stefan driving and Damon in the back trying to make things uncomfortable for them with the mention of how she broke his heart and how he and Caroline are together is VERY MUCH like the scene in season 5 when Katherine was in the backseat and Damon and Elena were in the front and Katherine made things hella awkward by talking about Stefan. Except that actually WAS awkward because Elena actually was Stefan’s true love and Elena consistently kept choosing Stefan over Damon even when with Damon.

15. So now they’re shoving Bonenzo scenes down our throat and trying to force sexual tension where there is none. Bonnie and Enzo never interacted this way. And banter does not equal sexual tension especially when the banter is terrible. Next. 

16. Also Valerie and Stefan “bickering” is not bickering. THEY DON’T EVEN EMOTE.

17. Oh look parallels between Lily waiting for Julian and Damon waiting for Elena. WhatEVER.

18. At least the show knew that the doctor’s name was Frankenstein and not his monster. At least they did one thing right.

19. Once again Damon manipulates Bonnie into doing something she doesn’t want to do and all she says is “you owe me” writers, WRITERS, every single person on that show owes Bonnie their lives, like they should be grovelling at her feet for eternity. Jfc.

20. Oh look Stefan suddenly “cares” about Valerie. I don’t CARE.

21. The show knows nothing of subtlety or construction of episodes. It’s revealed that Bonezo is a thing at the beginning of the episode, about 15 mins in Bonnie laments about having no love life life then she sees Enzo and all he does is taunt her about having no love life. HOW WOULD HE KNOW? Stop trying to shovel EVERYTHING into one episode. Like this should’ve been cumulating if not from last season then at least the beginning of this one instead of having her follow Damon and Alaric everywhere. In BTVS, Willow becoming a lesbian was NOWHERE NEAR planned and I actually have a lot of issues with the way Joss did it and how Tarwillow actually functioned as a relationship but still there was more buildup than this! And you still had an “oh true” moment when it was revealed she and Tara were dating! AND I HATED TARWILLOW. 

22. Lol I spent all this time being like Valerie and Stefan have no chemistry and they DON’T but when Stefan lists all these things he feels about what happened to Valerie, he emotes more here than he did when he SAW Caroline tortured. 

23. Damon and Bonnie have more chemistry than Bonnie and Enzo. This is all too much.

24. Anti climactic ending.

25. Oh BonKai, how you could’ve made this all better.


As per tradition: @thewitchandlonerdiaries

Weekly Recap - Episodes 6-8

G’day! Welcome to week two.

When we left off last time, Dorothy had her soul and spirit crushed because she didn’t get into the sorority. She’s been a lump on the couch ever since.

yeah yeah but look at what Breton is saying. She’s not wrong. This was her legacy. This was her dream. This was the point of going to this school and it didn’t happen? She’s allowed to be in a funk. A week is probably long enough though so Connie asks for suggestions and Breton you are my new favourite.

I laughed so hard at “throw pennies at her until she gets up” and man I hope my boss didn’t hear me. I was the one who’d throw socks and random shit at my brother to get him out of bed when we lived together so Breton, I like you. But online friends can’t physically be of assistance so a call for backup goes out.

oh jesus. and what the hell is on her shirt? it looks like the lovechild of a squirrel and a Tasmanian Devil.

Welcome the cavalry. Portia is heading up Operation Save Dorothy and Ariana jfc don’t be an arsehole. 

She deserved that and Dorothy is exactly like me in the mornings - if you get too close you run the risk of getting punched or having something thrown at your head. Portia keeps trying though and brings up all the fun shit they can do - a picnic, a mixer with a chocolate fountain and literally none of that stuff happened where i went to school. We did have people throw couches out of windows though. And there was the Whalebone Incident. And the Deer Incident. and all the cat food. …my first uni was a bit of a shitshow. 

None of these really get our fighty hero out of the blanket nest she’s in so it’s time to call in the big guns.

(just so we’re clear the Big Guns is Alex, not the penny thing).

Alex does indeed show up and bro have you used a computer? Have you ever used the internet? Why do you have such a rod up your butt about online friends?

Thank you, Breton. And thank you, Connie for pointing out that this is the crew who got her through high school.

See? “Laura” is gonna come through the monitor and kick your ass so get off your high horse and get sweepin’, Alex.

Progress! She’s moved from the couch to a chair and she’s sitting up. Well done, O Fighty One.

Baby steps. Sitting upright first, showering later.

More progress! And a pep talk from Mom Alex!

Well that’s quite the look. I guess she’s also cashing in on that pie she’s owed. On Pi Day no less! Well-timed, @a4oseries 

Miller made her dinner and the pie! Hooray! He’s good in the kitchen.

Lbr, someone had to ask it.

So Miller, being the cutie that he is, basically wants the blessing of the squad to ask Dorothy out and I’m shipping a m/f pairing? That never happens. They’re all for it except cookiemonster (biiiiiiiiiiiiig friggin’ shock there) and after some cute emotional gushing, Miller finally gets it out:

awwww

So everything’s awesome!

except not really.

Ep7 is girls night, which quickly turned into All Inclusive Regardless of Gender Night and unsurprisingly Breton has a comment about it. Also, rad shoutout to all gender identities! Nicely done. More shows need to do this. Seems like Dorothy has been spending a lot of time with her dude and Portia (in that fabulous onesie that I need in my life immediately) is happy they managed to snag her for some quality time. Mom wants to meet the new beau though and Arsehole Ariana wondered if he’s even real (sidenote that snark and sarcasm was funny in the first episode but now i’m like welp you’re a downright rude asshat).

Comments from the peanut gallery are the best. But boytalk comes later because there’s A Schedule and of course she’s scheduled things in.

This was hilarious. And she’s right, accidental felonies are a great way to bond. But aww she planned this so Dorothy would feel like she’s got sisters even though she didn’t get into a sorority and that is SO GODDAMN CUTE. First up: 90s Karaoke.

Imagine CookiemonsterNotLauraButWeAllHeadcanonItAnyway singing 2 Become 1 to Carmilla at karaoke.The internet doesn’t get to see this and that’s probably a good movie, Alex considering how most karaoke events go. Or at least the ones I go to. 

Post-singing, it’s time for the ol’ sleepover staple: truth or dare. Oh and guess who’s being a child about it.

Yeah, why don’t you.

The Inseperables who are legit people and yes they’re friends shut the hell your mouth Ariana are invited to play as well. Let the games begin!

high-five, Breton. Next up is Alex. She picks truth and is asked to tell a secret. Guess who has a dickhead comment about her not having any skeletons in her closet?

Shut up.

shuuuuuuuuuuut uuuuuuuuuup. at least she’s a self-aware asshole? much like myself.

Whoa. That was an outburst. If she was perfect she’d be able to protect people and keep ‘em safe? She had something happen in the past, didn’t she.

oh yeah there it is.

That’s my preferred coping mechanism.

But she does. She was supposed to be taking care of a boy, a runaway. She thought she was protecting him but she ended up hurting him. He vanished and she hasn’t seen him since. She’s been carrying this guilt for years and I just wanna wrap her in a blanket and give her a hug because now I have feelings about this goddamnit.

“Just because it’s in the past doesn’t mean it can’t still hurt.” Wise words, Dorothy. But that was a bit of a buzzkill, eh? Portia tries to revive the night by starting up the next fun and totally not a downer activity - prank calling. Bit of a hard sell though. The energy’s gone out of the room a bit. Alex still wants them to have fun though but

they did the thing where they say the name of the show on the show!

Basically.

The night is revived! They’re gonna prank some people and for some reason that requires a wardrobe change? Portia were you raised by drag queens? Alex delegates tasks and asks the Inseperables who to call.

Well this has potential.

Right well I wish we could have seen what the transmedia has called the most terrifying prank call ever (that miller totally knew was D) but thats fine.


MY CHILD IS ANGRY AND I AM HERE FOR IT GO RIP OFF SOMEONE’S ARMS, GIRL. Sorry not sorry I’m getting invested in this.

Anyway we learn that Connie was rejected from MST even though she’s related to the president and that’s suspicious as hell. Wanna bet who’s involved? Yeah Rick the Dick of the SU and DOUCHECANOE Dorothy go fight him please. Rick made Anne kick ‘em both out because he’s the worst.

Yeah he’s terrible. But there are two differing opinions on how things are going here. It gets a tad heated and a lot awkward:

Yikes.

Yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiikes.

Anne was forced to block two pledges. Guess who? Rick the Dick has Doucecanoe as a minion doing all his evil bidding and let’s be honest, he and D are not on great terms, and that’s putting it HELLA mildly. 

Someone give her a hug. 

But wait! Our hero isn’t defeated. She won’t go down without a fight.

Get out, Buzz Killington and let her fight someone (or at least something that isn’t a bike rack).

Because they’ve known you for more than 3 seconds.

Ariana is on “Team Go Kill Him” but Alex isn’t up for mob violence sadly. She wants Dorothy to let it go but man she’s like a lobster when they get a finger in their claw (and I say that from experience).

Rick’s shadiness is no surprise but uh, Alex seems like she knows somethin eh?

Yeah she’s got inside info on this I bet. REGARDLESS she says again that violence is not the answer

OK BUT CONSIDER THIS: you can.

Mom has a point - if they’re gonna try to figure this shit out they need to be smart about it.

So CLEARLY that was something that was an option before, and Breton I’m with you, that’s usually my first reaction to twatwaffle dudes.

Douchecanoe isn’t the one with power. But there’s someone who wields a mighty sword. And now he’s got a short angry army mad at him.

YESSSSSSS RIP HIM TO SHREDS.

for the love of a god i don’t believe in, someone get her a helmet and a mouthguard.

i-move-the-stars-for-no-one  asked:

JFC, yes! The dark side is indeed very, very dark. It's just full of people saying how much they hate Daryl and how the "real Daryl" AKA season 2/3 Daryl needs to come back so that he's good enough for C@rol and strong enough to support her emotionally and I'm like???? If you have to have a character regress 2 seasons back to make your ship happen, something isn't working. Or how they will be willing to "forgive" him for 4B if he kisses C@rol's ass when she returns & then I laugh (but also cry)

I’m respectful of everyone’s opinions as long as they are respecting me and mine. That doesn’t mean I have to agree with them, and I don’t. I don’t like to generalize either. There are some of them who need a reality check. It’s one thing to be ignorant but if you’re a dumbass and also a hypocrite, that’s where I draw the line. God knows if those scenes were with Carol instead of Beth, they would be shouting canon from the rooftops and throwing a party in the tag. Would they consider them romantic scenes then? You bet your sweet ass they would. The level of hypocrisy, denial, and outright idiocy slays me ok. IT SLAYS ME. I also will not tolerate anyone bashing the actors who play the characters. Pro-tip: they’re just doing their job. If you hate them for doing what they’re paid to do then I am sorry, but you are a Grade A jackass. Blame the writers. Blame Gimple. Don’t blame them.

The “real Daryl” is horseshit. Daryl is Daryl and always has been Daryl. He’s evolving, like they all are. Is Carol still the same person she was in Season 1 and 2? No. But you don’t see anyone demanding to see the “real Carol” again. It’s life. Everyone changes, evolves, and adapts. On that show, they especially change and adapt because they have to. They’re still the same people they’ve always been, just growing. It really pisses me off that some people say Daryl doesn’t even deserve Carol anymore. Well what the fuck? Why the hell do you want her with him then ya moron? If anything, Carol doesn’t deserve Daryl and never has. Not everything has to be about Carol. When Daryl is not on the screen, I do not cry and bitch and moan about how Daryl is not on the screen. I like to see Rick too because Rick is also awesome. Some of them need to take a step back, take a deep breath, and remember that someday, somewhere in the future, Carol will be gone. Oh no. What an injustice. My heart bleeds for you. SUCK IT UP, PRINCESS.

Daryl does not have to kiss Carol’s ass. Nobody does. They are all equals. I don’t really care if she has Judith or not. Carol owes her life to both Daryl and Rick, on MORE than one occasion. Now is not the time to be keeping score on who owes who what. Daryl doesn’t need to be forgiven because he hasn’t done anything wrong. If being happy for a few weeks is wrong, then i’m afraid I didn’t get the memo. If falling in love is wrong, then go ahead and just shoot me now. No. Fuck that bullshit. Daryl is my character and I will defend him with a fiery passion.

What they are having a hard time understanding, from what I can tell, is that TWD has a new showrunner as of Season 4. They cry and cry about the “buildup” of Carol and Daryl getting tossed aside. Well, hmm, let’s see. Seasons 2 and 3, when this so-called buildup occurred, were ran by Glenn Mazzara. Who is no longer the man in charge. Maybe he wanted to get them together but you know what? He’s not here anymore. Scott Gimple is the man now and he has a different vision and as we all know, they are allowed to completely change the direction of the show under their control. Which he has. Basically, Gimple ships bethyl. Cry about it. We all want things but we don’t always get our way. That’s just life. If you’re going to sit there and pitch fits like little babies because your ship isn’t happening then you should really reassess your immature teenybopper argument. If you’re really going to write angry letters and boycott a whole network over one coupling your little heart desires then you have bigger problems than just your ship sinking.

I’m venting, i’m sorry. I keep having to read trash talk about Daryl and Beth and Norman and Emily and i’m sick of it. I should be nicer so i’ll just emphasize that i’m only referring to certain people on the dark side and not all of them. Some are cool. Also let it be known that I don’t mind Carol and I absolutely adore Melissa. See what I just did there? How hard is it? Going to hide now because I feel ashamed that I just lost my cool and this is highly frowned upon behavior. *slowly backs away*