jumping on the bandwagon like the loser i am

the signs as 90s comebacks

aries: YOU WANNA MAKE SOMETHIN’ OF IT?!?!!!
taurus: if you like it so much then why don’t you MARRY IT.
gemini: you’re a virgin who can’t drive.
cancer: i’m rubber, you’re glue. whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.
leo: life’s tough, get a helmet.
virgo: ugh. gag me with a spoon.
libra: talk to the hand. (cause the face ain’t listening.)
scorpio: what planet are you even from?
sagittarius: cancel my subscription, i’m over your issues.
capricorn: no comeback, they’re weird af
aquarius: loser, loser, double loser, as if, whatever, get the picture, DUH
pisces: i know you are, but what am i?