jump off the bridge

Shit I’ve Heard High Schoolers Say
  • Why stop at capitalism? Destroy everything.

  • Guys it’s been three weeks since I’ve eaten a vegetable

  • At least we have memes to dull the pain of existence

  • An AP student: Oh my god I thought seven was less than six 

  • (while filling the cap of their water bottle with water) SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS 

  • friend one: If all your friends jumped off a bridge wou-
    friend two: probably

  • I’M GONNA GO HOME AND DRINK A WHOLE GLASS OF WEED

  • If cows ruled the world would they drink human milk?

  • student: my calculator is broken
    teacher: your calculator isn’t broken, you’re broken

  • no actually I think you have to be of age to be considered a cougar

  • (during math class on the second floor) student 1: so like how far do you think the distance is from that window to the ground?  
    student 2: enough

  • teacher: has anyone ever been to New Orleans?
    Student: does Popeyes count?

  • my word count on this paper isn’t very high but I certainly am

  • we’re in adult limbo. I’m not a teen and I’m not an adult. I’M SUFFERING, THAT’S WHAT I AM!

  • Look at my… (swings leg up to show shorts) not pants
Don’t put your happiness in other people’s hands
They’ll drop it.
They’ll drop it every time.
—  (via sturzpoesie IG)

ok but who else had that little heart sinking moment when rick said “what, is this game for autistic people?” bc you thought they were gonna make a super terrible “joke” and then were immediately relieved when he said “because im starting to love it!” and morty replied with a smile

I know I have friends but I feel like I have no one to talk to about the shit that goes on in my head
—  (via @sturzpoesie-blog)
hate that feeling when you see something and your heart literally sinks, but you have to sit there and pretend you don’t care at all.
—  (via @sturzpoesie-blog)