juice spam

starkova  asked:

Alarkling + 45 😘😘

This one gets a liiiiitle bit steamy at the end *evil laughter*

Pairing: Alarkling

Prompt: 45 “Tell me a secret.”

“Tell me a secret.”

The Darkling slowly turned his eyes over to the white-haired Sun Summoner seated upon the throne on his left. Her eyes were trained on her lap, exhaustion tugging at her lips as she fingered the bone on her wrist. Fascination clouded her face as if it were new — not a century old.

“A secret?” he repeated with a small smile. The throne room was empty save for the two of them as they waited for a party of captured rebels to arrive. A few uprisings would surface every now and then, but the numbers had been dissipating over the years. “What do you want to know?”

She looked at him with fresh tears welling in her eyes, the picture-perfect image of a forsaken saint. “Anything,” she pleaded softly.

He rose and moved in front of her. Bending over, he placed his arms on either side of her, trapping her in her place just as he had when she first surrendered to his cause.

“My secret is that…” he paused for the dramatic effect he knew kept her on her toes until they curled with unadulterated bliss. “In Kribirsk, when you were first brought into the Grisha tent, I wanted to tear that tattered First Army uniform from your mousy little body and take you in front of everyone.”

Her tongue darted out to wet her drying lips, her breath coming out in quickened puffs of air.

The Darkling grabbed her wrist, circling the bone there and bringing it to his mouth, his hiss a poisoned whisper against her skin. “I wanted to tear you apart.”

Smoothie Challenge (Calum) Requested

requested by anon - saltine cracker part 2 where its all the other boys challenges?

This is the Calum version :) To read the original (Since this is technically a part 2) you can go HERE- Kimmie

“Hi my little toucans! I said happily into my camera. "Everyone seemed to really enjoy my saltine challenge with Michael so now it’s Cal’s turn. He should be coming into the room any minute now.”

“I’m here, calm your tits” he laughs.

“I need your hat sir” I say as I reach my hand out to him. Michael walks in the room holding the remainder of the little pieces of paper that were left from the challenges. He places them in the hat, I shake it up and yell for Luke or Ash to come pick one. Luke comes in first and I make Michael hold the hat (Duh, I can’t hold it that high!) I hear Luke laugh.

“Smoothie challenge it is” he tells us. Calum groans and I laugh. I have an easy time eating weird foods but Calum has a rather hard time with normal foods on their own. I know I have the one in the bag so I’m not worried.

“You choose what the loser has to do Cal” I tell him. I’m not so sure where Calum’s confidence in himself comes from but he smirks.

“Loser has to kiss Luke for 20 seconds” he says, one eyebrow raised.

“I have to get a ruling on this” I reply, looking at Michael. He nods and I’m honestly shocked.

“No tongue though” he says sternly. Calum and I both salute him then laugh at how in sync that was.

“Either this is going to be a real long video or editing is going to be a bitch” Ashton says.

“Eh, I’ll warn the toucans in the intro” I reply. While we were discussing the forfeit, Luke had gathered all the materials we needed.

“Don’t I get a say in this?” He asks.

“NO” the four of us answer in unison We all laugh again as I show the camera the ten canned items that we would be randomly getting.

“There are 5 that are yummy and 5 that are gross. We have strawberry jam, fruit cocktail, whipped cream, orange juice and cherries.” Calum looks at his half and makes a gag noise.

“Tuna, anchovies, soy sauce, hot sauce and spam?” he says the last one with question.

“It’s oddly good on it’s own but it looks gross and I refuse to question it’s ingredients” I tell him and he groans. I look back up at the camera.

“So we wrote numbers on each of the containers and on little pieces of paper.” I then dumped them into the hat. “You choose first Calum, you are the guest” I say. He reaches his hand into his hat and pulls out a 4.

“Ha!” he laughs as he holds up the strawberry jam. I laugh too as Michael dumps a few scoops into Calum’s blender. I choose next and smile when I get whipped cream. As Luke sprays it into my blender, Ashton huffs.

“Well that’s no fun.”

“Maybe not for you, Ash. You are not the one who has to drink it” I reply. We keep choosing numbers until we get the final list.

Calum: strawberry jam, cherries, tuna, anchovies, soy sauce.

Me: fruit cocktail, whipped cream, orange juice, hot sauce, Spam.

“This is definitely rigged” Calum whines.

“If this was rigged, I wouldn’t have Spam or hot sauce” I say back. Both blenders get firers up and Luke and Ashton laugh as the mixtures come together. Michael comes over to me.

“Babe kiss me now, I don’t think I will want a kiss after this” he jokes. I kiss him quick on the lips. “Also, you better win. I don’t want to watch you kiss Luke.” Luke gives a mixed Luke between anger and hope.

“I’d rather kiss her then Calum” Luke says to him.

“Sorry Lukey, I drank spoiled milk once by accident and I didn’t even gag” I chuckle and Calum looks at me wide eyed. 

“Not much of a gagger, huh Mikey” Ashton whispers and Michael just gives a wicked smile with a wink. Calum and I are both handed a cup and he smells his before gagging. 

“This smells like Ashton’s dirty laundry after a gig” he groans. 

“Oi” Ashton yells but Luke cuts in.

“Make a habit of smelling Ash’s post gig clothing?” Calum has no response other then his mouth flapping open and closed like a fish.

“Cheers” I say to Calum but before I take a sip he stops me.

“Wait, how much of this do we have to drink?” He asks.

“It’s only a small glass Cal” I say. “First one to finish without any major spillage wins.” He nods and does the motion for ‘cheers’. I put the glass to my mouth and hold my breath as I take as many of the biggest gulps as I can. I feel the chunks in the mix but will myself to keep going. The hot sauce leaves a burn in the back of my throat but the whipped cream keeps it at bay. I swallow the last sip and gasp for air. I chance a look up and Calum is over the sink with only ¾ of his drink gone. I walk over and pat him on the back.

“Aww, it’s okay Cal, Michael lost to me too” I laugh.

“You’re done?” he whips his head up to look at my glass.

“All done" 

"Shit!” he sighs. “I should have made a better choice then kissing Luke.”

“PUCKER UP BOYS!” Michael says loudly and you can hear Luke and Calum both groan. 

“Cake shippers are going to loose their minds” I laugh as Calum leans in with his eyes shut tight.

“Gifs galor!” Ashton adds on. I look down at my watch and count down the 20 seconds that Calum made the forfeit. When the boys pulled apart Luke makes a noise followed by “Gross.”

“Oh it’s not THAT bad” Calum responds.

“I can taste the smoothie” Luke says deadpan.

“Oh gross” Calum answers. We all laugh and look back up at the camera. 

“You are so welcome my little toucans!” I say cheerfully.  "Tomorrow’s video is another challenge but this time it is Ashton. Hope he starts to think of a forfeit now while he has the chance. Love you guys, see you tomorrow!!“

-Kimmie