Dad, this is my boyfriend Archie. And this is Archie’s boyfriend Jughead and Jughead’s girlfriend Betty, who is also my girlfriend.
Jughead and Betty:
Hey…oh…wait, sorry. What’s the situation?
What do you mean?
How does this work?
Archie is gay but he’s straight for me, but he’s gay for Jughead, and Jugheads really gay for Archie, but straight for Betty. Betty is straight, but really in the closet and gay for me. And I hate Jughead.
- “sardonic humor is just my way of relating to the world.”
- has like two different outfits
- but they look the same
- resting bitch face™
- is sleep deprived since fourth grade probably
- so dark circles under his eyes aren’t even a temporary thing anymore
- likes way too much beanies
- kinda gay