judy waters

VD Humor
  • (Nick and Judy accidentally locked themselves out of the apartment while Violet is sleeping)
  • Nick: *after being told the lock smith would be there in 20* No-no, that's not good I can't wait that long KNOCK THAT DOOR DOWN!
  • Judy: Nick I'm not knocking that door down. Just relax okay, the baby's sleeping.
  • Nick: I don't know...what if she jumps out of the bassinet?
  • Judy: Can't hold her own head up but yeah, jumps.
  • Nick: OH GOD! I LEFT THE WATER RUNNING!
  • Judy: Nick, you did not leave the water running.
  • Nick: Did I leave the stove on?
  • Judy: You haven't cooked in months!
  • Nick: Is the window open because if it is a bird could fly in there and-
  • Judy: Wait-wait, hold on *presses ear against door* a pigeon-no an eagle! Flew onto the stove and caught fire! The baby, seeing this, LEAPS across the apartment to the mighty bird's aid. The eagle however misconstructs this as an act of aggression and grabs the baby in its talons, meanwhile the faucet fills the apartment with water! Baby and bird, still ablaze, are locked in a death grip, swirling through the whirlpool that fills the apartment!
  • Nick: ... Boy are you gonna be sorry if that's true.

For a great part of its early history, its secret status made it of little consequence in the wider world. But in time it grew, eventually emerging as a power almost without rival.

what a good city for arya to be associated with 

nytimes.com
Her Memory Fading, Paula Wolfert Fights Back With Food
The pioneering cookbook author, who has Alzheimer’s disease, no longer cooks much. But a special diet and persistence keep her as kinetic as ever.
By Kim Severson

I love the way that she is approaching the disease.

I love Ms Wolfert’s cookbooks and the way that she approaches food. She is the reason I ever bought a clay tagine or a clay bean pot. She is the reason I make my own preserved lemons and use them in cooking. She allowed me to travel all around the coast of the Mediterranean without leaving home. We’ve drifted a long way from women like her (Julia Child and Alice Waters and Judy Rodgers come to mind easily) who had a grasp of both professional and home cooking techniques and flavors and a deep understanding of culture and they wanted all of their readers to possess the same.

Long ago I “met” her through a food board I participated in and tested a recipe that went into one of her cookbooks. She loved that my grandmother was from Calabria and selected a recipe that grandma would have recognized from her youth in Italy. That little gesture of tying a recipe she had to the place where I have roots was likely not about me, it was about her and her gift of connecting us together through the food we celebrate and eat.

The Uninvited Guest

a (shitty and kinda rushed) fanfic (just barely) about WildeHopps inspired by this post by @textsfromzootopians


Judy Hopps sat in her apartment, filling out papers that Chief Bogo had given her that day. It was 11:45 at night. She scribbled furiously in the dotted lines, trying to finish the task early so she could finally have some off time. Ever since the missing mammals case, Bogo had upped her from a measly meter maid, to the first person he would go to every time there was a new case. Which was quite often, surprisingly. While the other officers went on break and did their usual chats by the water cooler, Judy was sitting at her desk, overviewing one of the hundreds of case files that Bogo would drop in front of her. It was tiring, but it’s what she should’ve expected.

All these late nights meant that she got less and less sleep, which many people noticed. Especially Nick. Nick spent most of his day by the bunny’s side, for reasons that included “making sure she didn’t overwork herself,” “being bored,” and even just “seeing how she’s doing.” But Judy knew that the real reason was that the size and demeanor of their co-workers scared Nick, even if he wasn’t willing to admit it. She liked having Nick around. His constant jokes lightened the mood when Bogo dropped another hefty pile of papers on her desk. And, she had to admit, his smugness made him sort of attractive to her… She dropped her pen on the desk, sat back in her chair, rubbed her eyes vigorously, and groaned. There was no way in hell she would finish these papers by sunup. Maybe if she just closed her eyes for a little, she’d be able to focus later…

Judy awoke to a bright white light, and a loud, thunderous crashing. She bolted out of her seat, reaching for her gun, ready to open fire on any unwanted intruders. Until she saw the second bright flash of light. She sighed and hung her head. It was only a thunderstorm. The lack of sleep must have her paranoid as well. She sat down at her desk and stared at the papers for what seemed like hours. There was a knock at her door. It was soft, but noticeable. She decided to ignore it, pretending like she was asleep. There was another knock, louder. She still ignored it. Whoever was on the other side of the door seemed to have an emergency, since they were banging on the door now. Judy sighed and stood up, walking toward the door. All her extra work earned her some nice paychecks, which she used to rent an actual apartment, with multiple rooms, an actual bed, and her own bathroom. It was nice, even if everything was too big for her. She grabbed a stool next to the door and stepped onto it to peer through the peephole.

She saw a familiar green eye staring back at her.

“Carrots?” Nick whisper-yelled, “You in there?”

Judy looked over at her clock. 2:37 a.m., it read. She thought to herself as her partner kept banging at her door, It’s way too late, I can’t let him in. Or would it be too early?  Either way, I shouldn’t let him in. She stepped down from her stool and paused. But he’s my friend. Judy then did something she would never do, and her father would disown her for. She moved the stool, and opened her door to a fox at night.

Nick was standing on her vinyl double sided mat from Targoat that said, “WELCOME TO MY HUMBLE ABODE” on one side, and “THANKS FOR HOPPING BY!” on the other. Judy usually hated bunny puns, but she thought this one was clever. Nick was standing on the pun side. And he was soaking wet. His tangerine fur was now a matted carrot color, and his green button up was sticking to his body. She stared for too long. He smiled at her.

“Hey, Carrots. I’m in kinda a situation, can I come in?” He asked.

Judy stood dumbfounded, mostly of how he was ruining her mat, then responded, “Ye–um, yeah, sure.” She stood aside and let the fox come in, cringing at every squelch he made with each step.

“Why…um, why are you soaking wet? In my apartment?” She questioned with a smile.

“Funny story!” Nick’s ears perked up. “I was on a case, following a perp!” Judy crossed her arms. “And it started raining, well, more like pouring, and the perp got away!” Judy cocked her head.

“You let a perp get away?” She frowned, even though she knew he was lying.

His ears sunk back down. “Well, um…”

She grinned and socked him in the arm. “I’m just joking. So what actually happened?”

He rubbed his arm. “Ow… Okay, so,” He sighed and plopped down on the pleather couch from Mousy’s. Judy tried to protest, but it only came out as a squeak.

“I was taking a taxi, right?” Nick continued his story, “And I was in Tundratown, and the driver made a joke about how big the fare from Sahara Square to the city would be, and I made a comment that I left my wallet at home, and he kicked me out! Can you believe it?” He threw his arms up. “I had to walk for miles in the storm!”

Judy walked to her kitchen and grabbed the box of teabags. “And you came here because…?” Nick shrugged. “I didn’t feel like walking the extra three blocks?” She laughed turned on the stove, putting the kettle on. “Well, you’re ruining my couch, so if you’re staying here, you need to shower or something.” Nick stood up quickly. “It was too small anyway…” He grumbled. Judy put the teabag in a mug and walked down a hallway. “Come on, fox.” She called from the end of the hallway. He followed her. She swung open a door, also by stepping on a stool.

“The shower’s right there, and there are towels in the cabinet.” She turned and walked back to the kitchen to tend to her tea. She heard the water start running, and walked towards her now-ruined-sofa. “I’m gonna have to buy another one,” She mumbled to herself. She stood there for a second, just listening to the pitter-patter of the rain against her window, until she heard her phone vibrate against the wooden desk. She dragged her feet as she picked up her phone. “Nick: iMessage” It read. She sat down and unlocked her phone.

your shower scrub sucks,” It read. Judy smiled and typed back, “Thanks.” A few seconds later, two more; “why is it carrot scented. are carrots just alluring to rabbits or??? are they sexy to them?????” She snickered to herself, and fired back. “I’m letting you stay over so you can hide from the thunderstorm, and this is how you thank me???” Nick and Judy always bickered over text, but it never got too extreme. “look, carrots suit rabbits but they don’t exactly suit foxes. and i’m already orange enough as it is.” He replied.

Well, what do you want me to do about it? Go to the store and get you some blueberry scented scrub?

yes.

Unbelievable.

Judy hurried to the nearest Quick-E-Mart in search of the blueberry scrub that Nick needed so desperately. The cashier was a teenage sheep who rolled her eyes when Judy walked up to her. She was just generally rude to her. Judy got in her car and sat in the parking lot. Am I really buying shower scrub for Nick? Can’t he just buy it himself? She thought. She didn’t have time to respond to herself, because her phone buzzed again.

where are you.

I’m on my way, hold on.

She pulled out of the parking lot and drove home.

Four minutes later, she opened her door and set the bag down on her coffee table.

Hey I’m back. I have your scrub.

finally. i’ve been sitting her in your shower dripping wet. what took you so long

Yeah, you’re welcome. I put the scrub outside the door, I’ll be reading in my room if you need me.

thanks.

Judy was reading a book on the history of Bunnyburrow while listening to Gazelle’s new album. It wasn’t like she was gonna get any sleep anyways. Her phone vibrated again.

woah woah woah.”

What?

this scrub is for oily fur.”

..Yeah? And?”

i always get scrubs for sensitive and dry fur!!! you got the wrong one!

She sighed and rolled her eyes. Her paws worked furiously at the digital keyboard on her screen.

Okay, look. I have very powerful feet, and if I hear one more complaint involving your showering habits, you’re going to be on the receiving end of them. And I WILL make sure I kick that naked garbage region of yours, got it?

wow r00d

She smiled and went back to her book, then realized she left her tea on the stove. She rushed out to her kitchen. “Oh no no no no no no.” She picked up the tea kettle, only to find it empty. She boiled all the water to evaporation. “Dammit.” She cursed to herself.

“Woah, Carrots. I’ve never heard you speak like that.” Judy turned to see Nick’s smug face. And he was wearing nothing but a towel. Leaning against the wall. She tried not to let her eyes wander, and made eye contact with him.

“I only brought one pair of clothes, and they’re sopping wet, so…” He shrugged.

“Um, I can…give you something to wear, i-if you want.” She stuttered.

He smirked. “Nah, I’d rather just sit here naked. Of course I’ll wear some clothes.”

She walked into her room to her closet and picked out a way-too-big grey-sweatpant-navy-sweatshirt combo that her father blindly bought her that read “ZOOTOPIA U” on the front of the sweatshirt and down the side of the leg, maroon and navy respectively.

“It’s not much, but it’s all I have.” She handed them to him and waited out in the hall. After around thirty seconds, she knocked on the door. It swung open. “This is fine, I guess.” Nick grinned. The sweatpants were tight on him, and exposed his ankles, and the sweatshirt barely made it past his forearms. “I guess too big for me is still to small for you,” Judy joked. “Well, you’re a pretty small bunny, so,” Nick smirked, and Judy felt a pang in her stomach. She looked over at the clock. 4:30 a.m. She yawned and sat down on the bed. “Um, the couch isn’t very comfortable, and I only have this bed, so–”

“I don’t care, really.” Nick hopped onto the bed next to her, and turned on his side. “Night, Carrots.” She silently stared at the wall for a few minutes before turning out the light, not bothering to get under the covers. She closed her eyes and drifted off. She awoke to the pale glow of the moon bathing the room in a faint porcelain color and the roar of thunder. She moved her head and got the feeling of fur all over the side of her face. She was snuggled up against the side of Nick, her arm sprawled over his abdomen. She was about to move away, embarrassed, before she felt something behind her. He had his arm around her too. Holding her side, as if she was an anchor and he was a ship in stormy waters. She blushed and slowly poked his cheek to see if he was asleep.

“Nick?” she whispered. His breathing didn’t falter or change. She lowered her arm back onto his abdomen, snuggled up closer to him, and closed her eyes. She fell asleep with a feeling of euphoria.