At times, I have been guilty of doing one of these, be it intentionally or unintentionally. Tactless remarks/deeds hurt people, especially those with a backstory. The negative impact I or we bring to other people can transcend the abysmal dimensions of their insecurities.
Food for thought: Mind the repercussions of what we say or do to other people. Making people feel bad about themselves will neither get us to a higher elevation nor will make us better persons. Just because the shoe doesn’t fit doesn’t give us the license to strain other people.