I was actually seeing a girl for a short while who looked a lot like Felicity Jones about 9 months ago or so (at a guess). She had the same jawline and lips. I really fancied her but she was so naive it drove me crazy and I had to break it off. There’s naive-cute and then there’s naive-annoying…
I don’t know if that makes any sense; but it does to me.
The girl was a really lovely sweet girl at times but we didn’t didn’t really connect. My one proud moment from that sort time was making her fall in love with the song “Here’s Looking At You, Kid” by The Gaslight Anthem (my favourite song) even though she had absolutely no interest in my sort of music.
Anyway, the actual point of this post was partly because I was bored, and partly because I wanted to write about the so called “perfect woman”.Or at least my one… Felicity Jones may have the looks but what about the rest.
Personally I’m way too picky these days when I look for a woman. I have way too many things that I need and which is probably why I’ve been single for so long and will remain so for the foreseeable future. But it will be fun breaking it down and forming an imaginary woman for myself. And women, if you read this, tick all the boxes and decide you like whiny, cynical, picky freaks like myself then get in touch:
Firstly, someone I date I personally need to find attractive. We may like to say we go for personality and I assure you personality is most definitely the most important thing in a relationship but looks is always a good starting point. In saying that, a great personality often makes a person suddenly appear a whole lot more attractive. Over the years growing up I’ve found myself falling for a few good friends who I may not have fancied at first but the more time I spent with them the more fondly I felt towards them.
For me second on the list, I need someone who can be my best friend too. I need someone I really get along with on an emotional level and in terms of interests. - Sure, I don’t want us to agree on every film, movie or book. Part of the fun is convincing your other half over time that they’ve misconstrued the real point and beauty of your favourite film after they told you it was absolute shit. Or after she makes you listen to her favourite band over and over again you finally can admit that they aren’t quite as over-rated as you thought… - But you (or at least I) need to have common interests that you can share with a future partner.
Thirdly, I call this one “The best of both worlds” - and no I’m not talking about Miley though I definitely wouldn’t say no to the whore. Anyway, so yes, one of the things I find really attractive in a woman is someone who is quite flexible - and I don’t mean in the physical sense though that’s a nice bonus! No, I mean in terms of their time, and more importantly in terms of how they think and act. It’s great when a woman dresses herself up to look her best for you on a night out or a date. There is no better feeling than walking around somewhere like, “yeah, she’s mine!”; but by the same token I find it equally endearing when she’s willing and happy to look her worst and throw on any old clothes to spend a day in with you. I want someone who makes effort; but not every moment of every day. Someone who wants to explore places with you and find things that can be personal to the two of you, but is also willing to spend a day or fair few doing absolutely nothing. Cups of tea, cuddles, junkfood, lots of covers, sex, movies, music and sleeping isn’t my idea of fun every night with a girlfriend; but it’s great to be able to do with someone and usually these are the best kinds of days!
One of the things I really find attractive in a girl is when they have a real passion for something. Whether it be art, music, books, or whatever. I may know absolutely nothing about it but it’s always good to learn and it’s always that much more interesting learning from someone you’re attracted to about something they are passionate about.
Hopefully they will let me take them to gigs, even if it’s someone they’ve never heard of!
A high sex drive is always a plus.
Inconsistency in terms of the time we spend together. I don’t like it when couples (of our age anyway - of course with commitments and kids sometimes this is necessary) have like time schedules for the week and when you see each other. Like every Saturday night is our night and you have to see me even though you want to go out with your friends… Firstly, if I was in a relationship, I need someone who I can have some space from. Sure, sometimes you’ll spend every waking moment with them for 3-4 days and it will be perfect but it’s nice if you can then spend 4-5 days apart and it doesn’t phase either of you. I think when couples spend too much time together they end up like brother and sister almost. That might sound really strange/incestious but at least in my opinion, you start to sub-consciously see them as a family member. You both get ratty with each other for no reason whatsoever like you do with your siblings and it’s not healthy for a relationship. You need to have other friends too who you see and a social life.
Trust each other. can’t really have the above without that. So I’d need to trust her, and hopefully she could trust me too!
Finally, someone who’s opinionated, but doesn’t take her opinion to be fact. You know, she has something to say, she believes in what she’s saying but is always open to being proved wrong, or questioning beliefs. Stubbornness can be incredibly cute at times, but too much of it can become annoying - as with anything really (apart from Felicity Jones’ face).
Now obviously a woman doesn’t need all these qualities. But some would be nice please. If you have them all I’d just be thinking “why the hell would she be wasting her time with me?!” But you know, when I meet a girl who’s actually interested in me who ticks the majority of these boxes perhaps I may have a relationship again. As it’s been a long while now and I do miss it if truth be told (if anyone gets where that saying’s from then “I’ll love you forever if I ever love at all" - oh and that one!)
Hope you all have a nice weekend anyway, and if you read this, perhaps write a post on your perfect man/woman and link it to me. I’d love to hear what you go for. I can find out where I’m going wrong!
On a final side note, I find it quite amusing/strange that Felicity Jones was one of my first ever crushes when she appeared on tv as Mildred in the ITV show, The Worst Witch.