Hi, sweetie! May I request a best friends to lovers fluffy Jongdae scenario please? :) Thank you so much in advance! - T
You could feel your heart drop to the bottom of your stomach as you caught Jongdae’s gaze from across the room. The expression on his face was unreadable and you had no idea what to say to him after that whole fiasco. Tearing your gaze away from him, you instead looked down at your hands clasped in your lap, nodding along to whatever Junmyeon was saying beside you.
The members had invited you over an hour ago to hang out in one of the practice rooms with them since it had been quite a while since they had seen you. In some ways, you did feel guilty about avoiding them (or one member in particular) but you didn’t know what else to do. You couldn’t face them after what happened a few days ago. And now here you were. Sandwiched between Sehun and Junmyeon who conversed loudly across the room with the other members. The members all sat down in a large circle, taking a break from the taxing choreography they had only recently perfected.
You internally cringed. You should never have told Baekhyun or Chanyeol for that matter, about your crush on Jongdae. It would’ve been better had you just kept it yourself. Or better yet, you could’ve told someone like Kyungsoo or Minseok, even. At least those two would have had the decency not to say anything. You had never meant to say anything about it, anyway. But apparently, according to the two beagles, you were far too obvious with your crush on Jongdae. You practically had hearts in your eyes is what they said and you forced yourself to prevent the roll of your eyes.
You sighed. You supposed there was nothing much to be done about that now. You just wished that it didn’t have to be like this. It had been painful hiding it before, especially with Jongdae’s most recent girlfriend being in the picture as well. You were happy for them, as his best friend. Of course, you were. How could you not be? They were as perfect as a couple could get and Jongdae was as happy as you had ever seen him Still, you couldn’t stop the breaking of your heart whenever you saw them. You would always regret that moment of hesitance each time you came this close to confessing to the man.
Brushing a strand of hair that had fallen in front of your face behind your ear, you stole a quick glance at the man in front of you before avoiding eye contact once more at his unwavering gaze. Normally, you’d have been beside him, laughing at whatever dumb joke he came up with, smiling as he whined to you or the other members when being teased or you both would have just been talking about whatever came to mind. That was just how things were between you both.
There were no secrets, no lies, nothing kept from one another. You had always been totally honest with Jongdae about everything. It had been like that since childhood, with that pitiful promise of However, your growing and foreign feelings towards the man was entirely different subject matter altogether. You could never tell him. You could never bring yourself to. Even before he had gotten himself a girlfriend, you were positive that he didn’t feel that way for you at all.
It hurt more than you’d liked to admit. That you were no longer the one he sang to late at night, that he was no longer the one who held you so tightly in his arms whenever you felt like nothing was going right.
Suddenly, everything felt suffocating and you could no longer be in the room. You felt Junmyeon’s eyes on you from beside, lightly touching your shoulder before asking if something was wrong. Shaking your head, you replied no before standing up and walking out of the room. You sent a beaming smile to the members before you left, wishing them all the best for their upcoming comeback and then you left.
“Hey! (Y/n), wait up!”
You only made it a few steps down the hallway before you heard footsteps behind you and turned to face the man, himself. Kim Jongdae. And with him, he beared that smile on his face. Oh, the things his smile would to do your heart.
“It’s been a while, huh? How about I walk you back to your apartment?” His eyes were hopeful and his expression showed no signs of even knowing of your petty crush towards him. But you knew him better than that. For one second, he had you fooled. With his doe eyes and that sweet smile, anyone would’ve fell for it.
“You’re an idol, Jongdae. I can’t exactly be seen with you, now can I?” You said with more force than you had intended to but as of now, being this close to him was near unbearable. He only laughed in response.
“Yep. That’s true. What do you say we meet up at our usual place? I think we need to talk anyway. There’s a lot we need to catch up on.” His tone now took a more serious edge and you only managed a nod before he once again, smiled at you and waved you goodbye.
Truly, no one confused you more than Kim Jongdae.
You felt a shiver run up your spine and you sat at the swing, slightly swaying back and forth as you waited for Jongdae to turn up. The autumn wind blowed once more and this time, you clutched your coat closer to your body. Lightly kicking at the dead leaves beneath your feet, you began to wonder where the heck Jongdae was. Did he even plan to show up?
Your teeth were beginning to clatter and if Jongdae thought that you were going to wait in the blistering cold like this… then, he was absolutely right. Groaning, you decided that you would only five minutes more taking off out of here. You sure as hell were not going to freeze your ass off for a man that couldn’t even be bothered to meet up with you on time.
Brushing the coldness aside, you instead tried to remember a happier time. One where you and Jongdae would always come to visit this park, almost everyday as children. You remember how you would always play on the swings and he would always be the one pushing you. The two of you were almost hand-in-hand no matter what and you suddenly found yourself missing the warmth Jongdae brung into your life.
It was true. The distance that you had bridged between yourself and Jongdae was slowly but surely beginning to take its toll on you. He had always been a constant presence in your life. The one bright light to your constantly darkening life. Where everyone had already long abandoned you, Jongdae was the one who stayed by your side through it all. He had a place in your heart that no one else would take and one that you would never be willing to give to anyone else other than him.
You felt a tap on your shoulder and immediately you snapped your head to see the face of Jongdae, peering down at you. You could see his cheeks were somewhat rosy; probably due to the weather, you assumed as he took a seat beside you one of the swings. You continued to stare at the playground in front of you and a pool of warmth entered your stomach as you were reminded of memories of the past. The wind was significantly more gentle now.
“I can’t even remember the last time I was here.” He breathed. “You’ve been avoiding me.” He stated and his gaze held you in place as you shifted in your seat and let out a small “yes.”
“So, you know why then?” You started of, your voice but a mere whisper as you willed yourself to look at him but as you soon as your eyes landed on him, you instantly regretted it. How was it possible he could have so much power over you with just his eyes?
“I do. I want you to know that you’re an idiot, by the way.” He deadpanned at you as you could only stare at him with your mouth agape before he burst out into laughter at your expression.
“Ahhh, (y/n). You’re really just too much, aren’t you? You didn’t even give me a chance to explain myself at all.” He whined though his grin told you, otherwise.
“I love you too, dumbass.” He confessed, patting your head as you could only stare at him. “If you’d have given me a chance, you’d have known by now that me and Soomi had broken up almost a month ago.” He teased, smirking at the way your eyes widen and your mouth formed into a small “oh". He only continued to snicker at your befuddled expression before grabbing both of your hands and pulling you up to stand. "We never loved each other, I don’t think. We liked each other yeah, but there was almost nothing there. No spark. No fireworks. Not how I feel each time I’m with you.“
His hands were warm, you realised as you flushed in embarrassment at the whole situation. Of course. Of course, you had to be this stupid. You were so blinded by your own jealousy that you had never even bothered to ask how things between Jongdae and Soomi were. You only really left them at that; avoiding Jongdae like the plague whenever he came into view. It wasn’t done so you could spite more so because you felt that the less you saw of him, the less opportunity it gave your feelings to grow. Only, evrything had completely backfired. In the worst way possible too. You inwardly groaned in embarrassment. Jongdae, as if sensing this, brushed the strands of hair that had fallen on top you face and pulled you tightly against him.
“So… we good?” He asked, tilting your head up by the chin so that he could get a good look at you. You blushed and let out an exhale.
“Yeah, we’re good.” You said, a shy smile tugging at the corner of your lips as he pressed a kiss to your forehead.
“I love you. I know we say that to each other all the time but it’s different now. You know that, right?” His hand rested atop of your cheek and the distance between your lips was only growing smaller and smaller.
“I know. I love you too, Dae. Always have.” And that was all it took for him to finally close the distance between you both.