jim jonas

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Avengers: The Children’s Crusade (2012) #1 (of 9)

“I go to all the trouble to rescue you, and you two are in here making out? You’re prisoners. Prisoner don’t stand around making out with each other. Do they?”

I love Tommy so much, even if it’d be nice to get a kiss after such a tender moment.

RELEVANT HISTORICAL PEOPLE BY SIGN

Aries: Doris Day, Clyde Barrow, Johann Bach, William Wordsworth, Booker T. Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Maya Angelou, Robert Frost, Leonardo Da Vinci, Raphael, Lucrezia Borgia, Vincent Van Gogh, Rene Descartes, Harry Houdini,  Thomas Hobbes, Marlon Brando, Francis Ford Coppola, Wilbur Wright, Billie Holiday, Charlie Chaplin, Giovanni Casanova, The Iceman Killer

Taurus: Queen Elizabeth II, Immanuel Kant, William Shakespeare, Malcolm X, John Muir, Vladimir Lenin, Hirohito, Karl Marx, James Buchanan, Pyotr Tchaikovsky, Pierre Curie, James Monroe, Salvador Dalí, Maria Theresa, Jack Ruby, Napoleon III, Orson Welles, Harry Truman, Florence Nightingale, Saddam Hussein, Charlotte Brontë

Gemini: Jeffrey Dahmer, Wild Bill Hickok, Marquis de Sade, Pauline Cushman, Alexandra Feodorovna, Walt Whitman, Dante, Anne Frank, Clint Eastwood, Igor Sikorsky, Blaise Pascal, Marilyn Monroe, Morgan Freeman, John Ringling, Paul McCartney, Lord Scott Disick, Lana del Rey, David Berkowitz, Pancho Villa, Judy Garland, Arthur Conan Doyle, Morrissey, Helen Bonham Carter

Cancer: Princess Diana, Gustav Klimt, Harrison Ford, Malala Yousfzai, Nikola Tesla, Gregor Mendel, Bob Marley, George Orwell, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Solange Knowles, Robin Williams, Frida Kahlo, Alan Turing, Benedict Cumberbatch, Ron Kovic, Helen Keller, Gertrude Stein, Ernest Hemingway, Nelson Mandela, Anne Lindbergh, John Quincy Adams, Elizabeth Borden

Leo: Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, Andy Warhol, Barack Obama, Louis Armstrong, Virginia Dare, Jackie Kennedy, Amelia Earhart, Patrick Swayze, Francis Scott Key, Bill Clinton, Coco Chanel, Mick Jagger, Henry Ford, Lucille Ball, Orville Wright, Benito Mussolini, Clara Bow, Napoleon, Alfred Hitchcock, Fidel Castro, J.K. Rowling, Elizabeth Bathóry, Black Dahlia, Caylee Anthony

Virgo: Greta Garbo, Stephen King, Michael Jackson, Van Morrison, Elsa Schiaparelli, Jesse Owens, Beyoncé Knowles, Tim Burton, Ivan the Terrible, Louis XVI, Rita Dove, Ed Gein, Sophia Loren, Andrea Bocelli, Leo Tolstoy, Freddie Mercury, Pippa Middleton, Paul Walker, Dale Chihuly, Mother Teresa, Gene Simmons, Milton Hershey, Prince Harry, Queen Elizabeth, Roald Dahl, Jesse James, Agatha Christie, Amy Winehouse

Libra: Ben E. King, John Krasinski, Bonnie Parker, Scott Fitzgerald, Sting, Ray Charles, William Faulkner, Arthur Miller, Etan Patz, Kubali Khan, Alfred Nobel, Molly Pitcher, Jimmy Carter, Daryl Hall, Jonathan Edwards, Dwight Eisenhower, Johnny Appleseed, Kim Kardashian, Oscar Wilde, Margaret Thatcher, Ed Sullivan, Vladimir Putin, Niel Bohr, Bruce Springsteen, Anne Rice, Eleanor Roosevelt, John Lennon, Mahatma Gandhi, Jesse Jackson, Chuck Berry, Confucius

Scorpio: Lorde, Christopher Columbus, Hillary Clinton, Bruce Jenner, Theodore Roosevelt, Erasmus, Edith Head, Joni Mitchell, Lee Krasner, Bill Gates, John Adams, Carl Sagan, Claude Monet, Pablo Picasso, Ezra Pound, Charles Manson, Abigail Adams, Leon Trotsky, Jonas Salk

Sagittarius: Jim Morrison, Walt Disney, Mark Twain, Nero, Judd Nelson, Ludwig van Beethoven, Winston Churchill, Jane Fonda, Wassily Kandinsky, Louisa May Alcott, Pope Francis, Bill Nye, Emily Dickinson, Steven Spielberg, Joseph Stalin, Mary Todd Lincoln, C.S. Lincoln, Mary Walker, Jane Austen, Tyra Banks, Ted Bundy, Charles Ringling, Ada Lovelace

Capricorn: Kate Middleton, Paul Revere, Al Capone, Louis Pasteur, Muhammad Ali, J.D. Salinger, Elvis Presley, Alice Paul, Odetta, Richard Nixon, Edgar Allen Poe, Humphrey Bogart, Marlene Dietrich, Alexander Hamilton, Benjamin Franklin, Isaac Newton, Paul Cezanne, Cary Grant, Betty White, Dolly Parton, Janis Joplin, Mao Tse-tung, Marilyn Manson

Aquarius: Franklin D. Roosevelt, Maria von Trapp, Nicolas Sarkozy, Susan B. Anthony, Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Edison, Charles Darwin, Laura Ingalls Wilder, Wolfgang Mozart, Rosa Parks, Jackson Pollock, Bessie Coleman, Francis Bacon, Billie Joe Armstrong, Charles Dickens, Thomas Paine, Thomas More, Buzz Aldrin, Eddie Van Halen, Ronald Reagan, Bono, Ellen Degeneres, Paul Newman, Galileo, James Dean

Pisces: Mikhail Gorbachev, Jenna Fischer, Linus Pauling, Dr. Seuss, Chief Joseph, Neville Chamberlain, George Washington, Alexander Graham Bell, Albert Einstein, Marjorie Merriweather, Levi Strauss, Alexander McQueen, Steve Jobs, Jon Bon Jovi, Kurt Cobain, Nicolaus Copernicus, Elizabeth Taylor, Pierre Auguste-Renoir

Avengers: The Children’s Crusade (2012) #1 (of 9)

Back when the Young Avengers was really taking off on tumblr a few years ago, I was a little confused on where they had come from. I was familiar with Young Justice over at DC but since I had been spending so much time with DC stuff it was like, to me, the Young Avengers just appeared out of the blue. 

So I didn’t know where to start to catch up so it was actually this limited series that was my first real introduction to the team. That might seem fairly random (and it is) but as such this story has kind of held a special  place for me as one of the reasons I began getting invested in Marvel again after years of having gone turncoat in aggravation and sticking with DC instead. 

But let’s talk about this cover: this is like, basically a movie poster. They could not fit more dynamic character poses into this if they tried. And while there’s definitely some math problems so far as even rep for girls and boys, I do like that Kate and Cassie get like actual poses instead of just busts out looking vaguely sexy. 

Wanda gets the short end of that particular stick. Her head’s not nearly as big and menacing looking as Steve and Tony’s!

Carol’s.. there. Much like her role in the comic itself. But we’ll get further into that.

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Avengers: The Children’s Crusade (2012) #1 (of 9)

“And you think I have the power to do something like that… Because you believe Tommy and I really are the sons of the Scarlet Witch?”

“Here we go…”

“Tommy has doubts, but how else do you explain a speedster and a witch named “Thomas” and “William” who could be twins?”

What, it’s been months and Tony can’t be bothered to fork a few hundred dollars and have you two DNA tested? You’re going to tell me that at the very least the two of you still haven’t confirmed you’re twins? Or that SHIELD or Tony Stark himself doesn’t have a DNA sample for one of their longest timed members turned most feared mutant on the planet?

No one’s given anyone a paternity test?

But I suppose that level of thinking would also mean like… Tommy and Billy having to think of how weird it is to be on a team with a teenage version of their former kind of dad?

Nevermind, it’s okay, that’d be a weird thing to think about. Leave this giant plot hole in its place instead. 

I do love Billy calling out the Avengers on the hypocrisy of how they handle people though. I always love when heroes get called on these things because it’s like. At least the writer’s can admit that they’re making the characters contrived to justify what they’re doing. And you can feel that way and still love the characters on the receiving end.

Just look at how many Batman reviews I’ve given!

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Avengers: The Children’s Crusade (2012) #1 (of 9)

“In the beginning, nobody knew what to make of us. Seven super-powered Avengers fans who only came together because the Avengers themselves had fallen apart. Since then, we’ve fought Kang the Conqueror, a super hero Civil War, a Secret Invasion of Earth, and a siege on Asgard. So you’d think maybe the Avengers would trust us by now… But we’re still fighting to prove we’re worth of being called Young Avengers … even if it kills us. 

“Cassie Lang’s father was the microscopic Ant-Man. After his death, Cassie used her dad’s Pym Particles to follow in his footsteps as the size-changing Stature. Vision is the latest incarnation of the android Avenger who can manipulate his own density — and whose synthezoid soul makes him every bit as human as the rest of us. 

“Eli Bradley’s grandfather was the original Captain America. A third generation super-soldier, Eli continues to fight for peace as Patriot. Former New York society deb Kate Bishop so impressed Captain America on the battlefield that he gave her Clint Barton’s bow and dubbed her the new Hawkeye. 

“Tommy Shepherd has super-speed, white hair, and a criminal past — all of which he shares with the former Avenger Quicksilver. For obvious reasons, he’s called Speed. He also happens to look exactly like me which — in addition to my having magic powers — makes me think Tommy and I might actually be the long lost twin sons of Quicksilver’s sister, the Scarlet Witch. My name is Billy Kaplan, but in the field I’m called Wiccan. 

“A super-strong shape-shifter, Teddy Altman is the son of the Kree Captain Marvel. Like his late father, Teddy protects the planet as Hulkling. He’s also my boyfriend.”

Okay, so I know that anyone else who ever read the Babysitter Club books during their formative years or the Boxcar Children books or Nancy Drew or the Hardy Boys – literally anyone else who read books in fifth grade, is having the same flashbacks that I am right now. And depending on your love of nostalgia you’re loving it or hating it.

That being said, I love it. And this was incredibly helpful back when I was first getting to know the Young Avengers. I was like “Oh, obviously this isn’t the beginning for them but I sure as heck know what I’m reading now! That’s a good thing!”

And it was.

I also like the detail of the opening splash with Kate, Eli, and Tommy in the lead. I genuinely adore those three and think Kate and Eli in particular were the best leaders the team had.