Mentions suicide so if that isn’t your thing then the next
thing will be happier, promise. For @picassowasblue because she likes badass Lily as much as me ///
Eliza Potter is not stupid.
She’s almost seven now, and can put the bread in the toaster
without Sirius picking her up, so she can see that James is friends with the pretty
And she is pretty, as in, interesting pretty. Like she looks
like she could punch someone in the mouth, which Eliza actually saw her do one
time to Jimmy Ogden during school when he told her to turn around for him. Eliza
isn’t scared of her though, because once she fell over when she was riding her
bike on the sidewalk outside the house and the pretty girl ran over and helped
her up. The girl said that her name was Lily and helped Eliza inside. James
smiled when she opened the door even though Eliza’s knee was bleeding into her
James smiles a lot when she’s around, Eliza’s noticed. She
tells Lizzy, her best friend, and Lizzy snorts, and says seventeen year old
boys don’t smile a lot. And Lizzy would know, she has twin brothers who are
seventeen and is the only one in the class who has a raincoat without any mud
on it. Lizzy just understands these things. But James really does smile a lot
when the girl- Lily- is around. Like when he was mowing the lawn and she waved
at him from where she was picking flowers in her yard. James nearly took his
foot off when he tried to wave back and Eliza remembers Mummy yelling at him to
watch her flippin’ hydrangeas.
But Lily really is nice, plus she has cool hair. Eliza once
asked who poured all of that red paint on her head and Lily laughed while James
glared and told her not to be such a nerd. But it really did look like paint on
Lily’s head, and when she told Eliza that it was just how her hair was. Eliza
got annoyed; because she wanted hair that looked like blood so that she could
scare sway stupid Fabian Weasley who keeps staring at her in class. Lily
laughed again and said that she liked Eliza’s black hair, that black hair was
really cool. James smiled really hard when she said that.
Lily is painting her fence on Saturday and James gets out of
bed at nine in the morning (he never gets up that early, not even for cartoons) to help her. Eliza
brings them sandwiches that she made herself and when she walks over James is
talking, “…Yeah but that technically didn’t count as a suspension because Mum
never found out about it, she would have fucking shot me if- oh, hi, ‘Liza”.
Lily is grinning when Eliza hands her the pickle and jam sandwich. If she
really thinks about it, Lily smiles a lot when James is around too.
Lily also has a sister, but Eliza doesn’t like her at all,
because she yells at her when she’s riding her bike on the road and she made Lily cry
that one time, when they were outside and the mean sister said that she hated
her. Lily cried and Eliza wanted to hit the other girl, because she didn’t have
nice red hair or pretty eyes and she hurt Lily. But she didn’t, because mum
said she shouldn’t eavesdrop anymore and she was meant to be practising her
But she can tell Sirius about Lily, because Sirius is the
best at listening and he likes her pickle and jam sandwiches. Sirius grins so
big his face might fall off and says he won’t tell anyone, but she hears him
teasing James about it later. Oh well, James deserved it. He called her a nerd.
Lily comes over a lot more now, sitting on the couch
watching TV with James and sometimes he even lets Eliza watch with them. Lily
leans on James’s knees and Eliza leans on Lily’s knees and it’s like a cool
kneeling train. She likes it, because she gets to see James and Lily, who are
her favourite people in the whole world. Along with Padfoot, Moony, Wormy and
Mummy, of course. Eliza thinks her Dad might have been one of her favourite people
to, even though he’s in the ground with the stone on top. Mummy says he was
really sad and couldn’t take it anymore. Eliza still doesn’t know what ‘it’ is,
but she’s going to find out and punch it, because it makes Mummy sad and James
all quiet whenever they talk about Daddy.
She tells Lily this while she’s waiting for James to get
back from Remus’s house and Lily gets really sad, so Eliza tells her not be and
gives her a hug, because she doesn’t like it when Lily is sad, it makes her
James comes to her that night and asks if she’s ever sad
about Dad, so Lily must have told, but Eliza doesn’t mind because she and James
stay up all night talking about him, and Eliza likes that because talking to
James is nice. James is her favourite person to talk to ever, she thinks. She
tells him so and he hugs her. James is the second best huger, next to Sirius,
She tells Lily this and she says she must test that theory
sometime. Eliza doesn’t know what a theory is but she sees Lily hug James a few
weeks later after they do their big people school homework in his room. That
makes James smile a lot, and he doesn’t even yell at Eliza when she tells him
she broke his headphones by accident.
On the day that they always go and visit Daddy’s grave Lily
comes with them, Mummy never goes. She just stays in bed and won’t make Eliza
breakfast like normal, so James does it. But he’s really quiet and puts too much
milk on the cornflakes, so it’s not the same. They borrow Peter’s car because
it’s nicer and they drive to the rock in the ground with “ROBERT ELLIOT POTTER’
written on it in big letters. Eliza gets to put the flowers that they brought
down, and she arranges them in a smiley face so that maybe, wherever he is,
Daddy won’t be so sad anymore. Lily holds James’s hand and Eliza holds Lily’s
other hand and it’s like when they kneel on each other on the couch but not
fun. Not fun at all.
Lizzy tells her James wants to kiss Lily and Eliza tells her
that’s gross, because kissing is yuck and you aren’t allowed to do it until you’re
at least twenty-one. That’s what James, Padfoot and Moony all told her. Lizzy
tells her she’s just a big baby and Eliza punches her in the mouth just like
Lily did to Jimmy Ogden, because Lizzy’s always calling her a baby now and just
because she wears a raincoat without mud on it doesn’t mean she’s the queen of
the world. And she still doesn’t feel bad about it when she’s sent home early and
Mummy yells at her. She tells Lily what Lizzy said and Lily goes really red and
mixes up all her words, which is weird because Lily never does that.
One night the phone rings in the middle of the night and
Eliza answers, because the phone is on the desk right outside her room and it’s
Lily on the other end. She’s crying a lot and tells her to just go get James
please and Eliza is really scared because she sounds really sad and what is
she’s so sad that she leaves like Daddy. Eliza doesn’t want to see Lily’s name
a stone in the ground so she runs to get James really fast. James is mad when
she wakes him up but Eliza shoves the phone at him and watches him as he talk
to Lily. He says things like, “Calm down” and “I’ll be right there” and then
he’s putting on his t-shirt and running for his car. He says he won’t take
Eliza and that makes her mad because she wants to see Lily and give her a hug
and tell her to not leave, please, because Lily is hers and she loves her a
lot. She tells James not to let Lily leave forever and James looks at her real
hard and promises he won’t. And then it’s okay, because James doesn’t lie to
her, ever. So it’s okay.
Eliza asks Remus why Lily was crying when he comes over the
next day because Remus is smart and knows how to explain things so that they
make sense, he always helps her with the stupid math homework so he will help
her understand why Lily called in the middle of the night. Remus looks at James
for a minute and James just gets up and leaves, which is confusing. Remus tells
Eliza that Lily had been at a big people party and one of the boys had tried to
hurt her, so she called James to come and get her. Eliza asks if James punched
they boy and Remus smiles, saying he doesn’t know, but he should have. Remus
then makes her promise to tell him or Peter or Sirius or James if a boy ever
tries to hurt her and Eliza does, because why wouldn’t she tell? Peter, Remus,
Sirius and James are her best friends, even better than Lizzy. Remus hugs her
when she tells him this and she hugs him back, because Remus is the third best
hugger of all time.
Lily gets a rabbit and Eliza likes to go over and pet him,
but when James tries the bunny bites him and Lily laughs so hard that she falls
into her pool. She pulls James in by his foot and he yells and gets really wet.
Eliza laughs because they’re laughing and then James is pushing Lily’s head
under the water and Lily is splashing him and Eliza is grinning and grinning
because her older brother is laughing and Lily wasn’t lying about her hair, because
the paint doesn’t come out in water so it must be real.
James gets asked by Lily to go to her mean older sister’s
wedding and when he leaves in his fancy pants and jacket, Sirius stays and
watches cartoons with her. Watching cartoons with Sirius is fun, because he
yells funny things at the characters and makes popcorn. Sirius says that James
might be in love with Lily. Eliza doesn’t know what that means, because she
loves Sirius, so is she in love with him? Sirius laughs and pauses the Power
Puff girls. Then he looks at Eliza real hard which means he wants to tell her
something really important so she looks back at him and tries to look like she’s
listening really hard, because she is.
Sirius says being in love and loving someone isn’t the same,
because Sirius loves her but isn’t in love with her. Eliza still doesn’t
understand and wishes Remus was there to explain it, but Sirius keeps talking.
He says that being in love with someone is when your ribcage feels like a
flower garden whenever the other person is around. Eliza doesn’t know what a ‘ribcage’
is but she likes flower gardens and hopes that James has one in his body
always, so she says she doesn’t mind if James is in love with Lily, just as
long as they don’t kiss until they’re twenty
one, because that is illegal. Sirius smiles and tells her she’s right. Then he
makes popcorn and uses lots of salt, just like how he knows she likes it.
When James gets home later Eliza walks up to him and tells
him it’s alright if he’s in love with Lily. James stares at her for a minute
and then throws his wallet at Sirius’s head, who catches it and smiles, chewing
on the nice mint gum that he gave Eliza a piece of.
A lot of days later, she sees James and Lily kissing on the
sidewalk. But she doesn’t call the police, because James is smiling when he
pulls back and Lily flicks him on the nose and laughs. Eliza lets them do it
this one time, but next time she really will call the police. Because she’s not
stupid and Peter told her that if she kisses anyone before she’s twenty-one she
will have to go to jail. And Remus said they don’t have the Power Puff girls in
jail. And that would suck.