You’ve heard the oath “Jesus hot sauce Christmas cake” in the PS4 game Until Dawn.  But we can now exclusively reveal the recipe.

The Jesus Hot Sauce Christmas Cake recipe

1 cup Tabasco pepper jelly or jalapeño jelly (mild to hot as you prefer.  For very hot, consider habanero or ghost pepper jelly)

1 ¾ cups all-purpose flour

1 ½ cups organic granulated demerara or turbinado sugar

3 eggs

1 cup vegetable oil

1 cup buttermilk

1 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp. baking powder

1 tsp. ground nutmeg

1 tsp. ground cinnamon

1 tsp. allspice

1 tsp. ground cloves

1 tsp. salt

1 tsp. vanilla extract

Optional: 1 cup finely chopped spiced nuts

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Oil and flour two 9-inch baking pans.  Combine all ingredients into a large bowl (except optional nuts), and mix well on low.  Then mix on high until sugar is dissolved.  Fold in optional spiced nuts, and pour into pans.  Bake 40 to 50 minutes.  When the cakes have cooled, frost them with your favorite sour cream icing.

“slaveship” by Lucille Clifton

loaded like spoons
into the belly of Jesus
where we lay for weeks for months
in the sweat and stink of our own
why do you not protect us
chained to the heart of the Angel
where the prayers we never tell
are hot and red as our bloody ankles
can these be men
who vomit us out from ships
called Jesus Angel Grace of God
onto a heathen country
ever again
can this tongue speak
can this bone walk
Grace of God
can this sin live


Art: “An Unpeopled Land in Uncharted Waters” by Kara Walker