The Holy Family, by Palestinian artist SLIMAN MANSOUR
Jesus Christ, 28, a Palestinian immigrant, was killed today in Houston after bursting into a church screaming, "My house shall be called the house of prayer; but ye have made it a den of thieves." He was killed and BriAnn Tomkins, 6, was wounded after several parishioners opened fire. It is unclear who shot whom, but police say that each shooter had a concealed carry license and no charges would be filed. Christ's links to various splinter groups in the Middle East are still being investigated.