jesus h christ no

can someone tell me where this fanon trend of making ladybug hate chat’s puns, hate chat’s humor, hate chat’s flirting, and be all around irritated with him in general comes from? seriously. 

because 

Originally posted by akumatisedmari

ladybug

Originally posted by checkyesbraixen

loves chat

Originally posted by miraculousgifsbug

so much?????

Originally posted by aeotaetumbles

like just?????

Originally posted by miladybugnoir

i don’t know?????

Originally posted by ladynoir-aka-life

where you guys are getting this from??????

VLIVE - JHOPECHAT ROOM

↳ first appearance (in the chat)
↳ is this how you do it?? is this right?
↳ wow the emoticons are awesome
↳ why do you hate going to school!!! new semestar new start!! everyone cheer up
↳ I’m eating so well so there is a problem
↳ ye~~hello!! i’m hobi (english)
↳ I love you too (Japanese)
↳ now I’m in the middle of brushing my teeth !! chikachika

Keep reading

if you’re struggling for AU ideas take a look-see at this list i wrote for my friend who dubbed it “better than the 10 commandments" 

1)     Coffee shop AU

i)       Barista and person who has a ridiculous coffee order

ii)      I’m worried about your coffee dependency

iii)     you accidentally poured boiling hot coffee over me so you’re responsible for taking me to A&E

iv)     you give me a different fake name every time you come into starbucks and I just want to know your real name bc ur cute but here I am scrawling “batman” onto your stupid cappuccino

2)      Flower shop AU

i)       You buy a weird amount of flowers and I’m concerned as to why

ii)      I’m allergic to flowers but I work in a flower shop – you’re a customer who’s very confused as to why I’d do that

iii)     (this is also a good way to incorporate flower meanings eg, buying certain colours/types for person to represent feelings etc.)

3)      Library AU

i)       You’re overdue on this book and I want it so I’m tracking u the fuck down

ii)      I work in the library and I’m a little concerned for your health bc you never stop studying

iii)     The library’s pretty empty save for you and me and OH that couple making out loudly in the shelves somewhere

4)      Awful first time meeting

i)       I accidentally punched you in the face when I was too overexcited about something

ii)      I thought you were my friend who’s just done something awful to me (read: cut my hair while I slept, dyed all of my clothes pink, etc. etc.) because you look similar from behind so I stormed up to you and shoved you from behind while calling you an asshole

iii)     You get the gist to this one

iv)     Oooh when you told me your name I thought you were joking because it’s fucking awful and I made a joke about it and things got awkward real fucking fast (perfect for a Hannibal au just saying)

5)      Weird places to meet/awkward meetings in general

i)       We live in the same block of flats but haven’t ever talked and Sunday morning we were both doing the walk of shame and had to stand in the lift together

ii)      “okay I know that being in the woods at 2am is a weird thing to be doing but my friend called me and- wait, why are you in the woods at 2am, fuck I’m going to die aren’t I?”

iii)     A personal favourite of mine – first day at a new job and oh fuck my boss is the person I drunkenly hooked up with last weekend/night

iv)     We keep accidentally running into each other I’m not a stalker I swear

v)      You live across from me in our apartments and we smile when we see each other but we don’t really know each other and oh you’re the stripper at my friend’s stag do/hen night fuck this is really uncomfortable

vi)     “My shower’s broken but I’ve got a date tonight could I possibly use your shower please?” “Oh sure (neighbour that I’ve been crushing on for the past six months) of course you can use my shower to get ready for your date (fuck fuck fuck)”

6)      Friends to romance – pining and all that wonderful shit

i)       You’ve got a date tonight and you asked for advice on what to wear but I’m so in love with you and damn you look good in the outfit I picked out for you

ii)      I really like you but you’re my best friend’s ex

iii)     You’ve liked me for ages and were really obvious about it and I didn’t like all the attention but now you’re over me I really miss it and fuck I think I like you too?

iv)     Somewhere along the way of getting into bar fights together, staying up all night with movie marathons, other friendship things, I’ve fallen in love with you but oh my god this could ruin EVERYTHING

v)      Friends with benefits oh wait I like you

7)      FAKE DATING HOLY SHIT I LIVE FOR THIS

i)       It’s my highschool reunion and I need a hot date so I can rub it in the faces of the people who hated me

ii)      My homophobic parents are coming to visit will you pretend to date me as an extra “fuck you”?

iii)     There’s a person who won’t stop bugging me will you pretend to be my partner so that they’ll fuck off?

iv)     I told my sister I have a boyfriend so she’d stop trying to set me up with people but now she’s coming to visit and I’m in too deep I need a fake boyf ASAP

8)      Soulmate aus

i)       The first words your true love(s) will say to you are tattooed on you and why the fuck are their first words something really ridiculous like ‘I’ll pay you a tenner to punch me in the face’ or ‘quick what’s your favourite animal’ or ‘fucking shit hell holy fuck wow oh my god jesus h Christ fuck me’ etc. or even worse a really ridiculous song lyric like  the opening lines of uptown funk or a high school musical song or smthing did you have to serenade me the first time you saw me asshole?

ii)      You get an ‘impression’ of your soulmate when you turn 18 or something but all I got was a strong smell of bananas or an overwhelming feeling that Thatcher was a good prime minister or an image in my mind of a fucking unicorn

iii)     The more ridiculous the better actually

iv)     Something like whenever your soulmate sings a duet you can’t help but join in and my fucking soulmate is in a goddamn band but I can’t sing for shit

v)      Or maybe something like soulmates always sneeze at the same time and I cant be sure but me and this kid in my French class just sneezed at the same time are we soulmates or was it a coincidence (proceed w character trying to make themselves sneeze around said person to see what’s what)

9)      Alternate universes for real

i)       Mermaids

ii)      Siren and asexual pirate who doesn’t understand why all his crew are losing their shit that person has a nice voice sure but what the fuck is happening

iii)     Hogwarts

iv)     We live in a world where the greek gods are real and you went and got yourself cursed and now I have to go on a fucking quest to sort this shit out why do I love you again?

v)      Pacific rim au (either they’re drift compatible or one of them is a ranger and the other stresses constantly bc what if they die yes I have read a fic like this no I didn’t come up with this one but it’s fucking good) (also if you haven’t seen that film go watch it now)

vi)     Literally any movie or book universe you like tbh just go for it

10)   Other aus that I like

i)       I wanted to go on the ferris wheel but there has to be two people to a cart come on random person let’s go oh wait are we stuck at the top? Fuck

ii)      We work in the same office and you have a goddamn squeaky chair and you wONT FUCKING STOP SQUEAKING IT BECAUSE YOU KNOW IT ANNOYS ME

iii)     Our mutual friend set us up on a blind date and I thought I’d hate it but you’re actually… kind of funny? But because I expected to hate it in no way am I going to let you change my mind just because you’re gorgeous and funny and intelligent oh no my friend is not winning this

iv)     It started to snow and I’m the only one of our friends who would go outside with you – I soon found out why none of the others would go out in the snow with you (this works best if they’re new friends who don’t know each other all that well) when you shoved a handful of snow down my back and declared snow war

v)      It’s nowhere near Christmas it’s literally still November would you calm down about Christmas wait no why are you getting the tree out no stop please stop (if you do this pre-relationship you can have the grouchy one secretly finding the other’s excitement endearing and falling in love with them actually that works for established relationship too)

vi)     Current partner got a new job in America (or other country far away) and we’re getting by on skype calls and emails but it’s not easy and then I met someone new (can be poly or can be finding the OTP person)

vii)   You want us both to get in shape and I hate working out/running but your ass looks really good in shorts oh the things I do for my friends and their nice asses

viii)  Carrying on from 10.vii. you’ve caught me checking you out in what I thought was a subtle way too many times and now you’re calling me out on it what do I do???

ix)     You’re an actor/other famous person that I really admire and I just saw you in the street and as I was debating whether or not to say hi you came up to me and started flirting what do I do??

x)      You were waving at your friend behind me but I got confused and waved back at you and now I’m dying of embarrassment but you think it’s cute

xi)     I sat down in the wrong class and I’m panicking but don’t want to get up and leave because the class has started and you think it’s hilarious and shut up you dumb fuck you don’t know me aahhh

xii)   I’m a waiter at this wedding and you’re a drunk guest who will not stop hitting on me please I’m trying to work no I can’t dance with you omg let me find you some water

xiii)  Our best friends are that awful ‘cute’ couple that make-out in public and call each other “sweetie” and “sugar” and “babe” and god they’re awful let’s talk about how awful they are – develops into “shit we’re the awful couple now”

xiv)  You pissed me off in class so I threw a book at your head and now I’m in detention and jesus fuck I hate you so much and the teacher made me apologise and wait you’re cuter up close and the way you talk is kind of nice actually oh fuck no

Okay I could go on forever but this is over 1,500 words of auing already I have too many ideas christ

send me some to @theskyis-forever with a pairing for me to write :)

The first time he sees you in lingerie - Male Avengers Headcanon

This wasn’t requested but idc, @scarlettsoldier and I were talking about plus size models lmao

Originally posted by little--batman

Bucky: 

He’d be so taken aback, but in the good way. He’d look you up and down, drinking you in. He’d bite his lip as he would make his way over to you, absolutely lost in the scraps of lace and bare skin, then he’d look into your eyes before mumbling that you’re so beautiful, before kissing you so passionately with his fingers tangled in your hair. “You’re gonna kill me, darlin’” 

Originally posted by ohevansmycaptain

Steve:

Steve would be so flustered, having never seen a woman in lingerie in the flesh. He would be rooted to to the spot once he walked into your shared bedroom. His facial expression would make you nervous, “Steve…Do- Do you like it?” “Oh G-God yes I do, doll, you look marvelous” It would be you that’d have to make the first move, you would take his large hands in yours and place them on your silk covered hips. He felt like a virgin again, but Jesus H. Christ, he was going to try and not ruin those skimpy piece of fabric the moment he got a hold on himself.

Originally posted by littlemisssyreid

Sam:

You’d be looking in the vanity mirror in your bedroom, catching a glance of the handsome man at the door in the reflection before smirking at him. You’d bought the undergarments as his birthday present. You blushed as his slender fingers made their way along your shoulders to move your hair out of the way. He would press kisses to your neck and mumble “happy birthday to me” whilst smiling as his hands wandered…

Originally posted by rad-aar

Tony: 

You’d walk into his lab wearing a black trench coat over the top, of course. His head didn’t turn until he heard your voice say “FRIDAY, lock the doors please.” He’d cock a brow up at your dolled up form, his eyes would travel down your legs and then his brows would raise when he saw them bare, his jaw would fall slack but would quickly pick back with a sly smirk. As you would unbutton the trench coat, letting it slide to the floor (whilst keeping eye contact and also biting your lip) you’d hear the words “Oh, my beautiful baby girl, come to daddy…”

Originally posted by theplacewheredreamsgo

Thor:

You had definitely remembered to pack your black corset number in your bag before Thor took you to Asgard for the first time. You wanted this trip to be memorable as possible. When he first sees you in it, you’re both in his bedchamber, you’re coming out of the en suite bathroom and his mighty facade drops completely and he chokes on his mead, he’s completely awestruck, for he had never seen such undergarments, ever. He would gently pull you between his open legs, trailing his large hands across the rigid bones of the black corset, to the silk panties below, all the way down to the lace tops of your stockings. “Do you like it, my love?” “I love it, My Queen.”

Originally posted by luvn-loki

Loki: (slightly AU)

Loki had been down the past couple of weeks, trying to adjust to being an avenger and the people around him. You wanted to cheer him up with something new, you knew behind his hard facade there was a troubled man. So you rummaged through your drawers and found the one thing you needed, the unused white lace panties and bra. You hastily slipped them on before throwing a t-shirt and shorts on over the top, before calling Loki through FRIDAY. As he opened the door to your room, he would give you a small smile before laying down next to you. “I have a present for you, darling” you would say, “and what would that be, my love?” “me, now I want you to take me out of my packaging” As he would peel your shirt up, his eyes would widen at the unusual underwear you were wearing, his hands would come to cup your breasts but at the same time, admire the fine lacework, he would let out a soft groan as he saw your panties..

Originally posted by justawkwardgirl

Bruce:

Oh god, the GIF says it all. He’d be quietly reading in his room, when you’d just saunter in casually in your pyjamas. You both usually slept in underwear, or naked *wink wink*, so as you padded towards the bed, you began to remove your clothing, as Bruce caught a glimpse of purple from beneath his lashes, he looked at you like so, and put his book down. He would murmur ‘oh god, oh god, oh god’ under his breath as you crawled your way towards him, straddling him. You would grab his hands and place them just below your breasts where the purple lace finished, urging him into touching you. His touches would be delicate and curious at first, “You like it, Bruce?” “Uh- Uh yes, baby it’s beautiful, but not as much as you” he would proceed to grasp your hip tighter as his other hand brought your chest down flush onto his, he would moan heavily into your kiss at the feeling of the lace scratching against his skin

Originally posted by arlothia

Clint:

As soon as he would see you, his mouth would go completely dry, and if you were in a cartoon his eyes would pop out of his head. He’d mumble, “Oh fuck, YES!”  before making grabby hands at you, begging you to come and sit on his lap (I mean seriously, look at them thighs!) He’d become bold and immediately kiss your breasts over the velvet fabric as his hands would ping the elastic of your stockings. He’d tell you how sexy you’d look on top of him in such attire whilst his hand would come to softly grasp your throat…

Originally posted by son-of-a-blake

Pietro:

You would be getting ready for a party- you didn’t intend for him to see you in your lacy undergarments until after the party! It was supposed to be a surprise! But as Pietro would come through your door he would make said face, giving you a once over, (ogling at your behind, obviously) whilst having a devilish grin on his face whilst saying “Ah, princezná, all for me?” making you whip around in shock. 

That mysterious 19

So we have all been sitting here theorizing about the number at the end of the chapter.

And then Old McDonald over on the wiki pointed something out to me.

19 = Iku

Iku = Having an orgasm.

Jesus H. Christ, Ishida.

mark my words (m)

pairing: reader x sugar daddy!kim namjoon

genre/components: smut, crack, fluff // kim namjoon had money and a taste for sweet little things with the sharpest tongues 

count: 15,548 words

also extended, rewritten, crossposted to ao3 as minjoon

a/n: for anon who requested it months ago im so sorry this took so long but i hope it was worth :^) 

The blinking line on his blank document was laughing at him. He swore it was laughing at him and has been laughing at him for the past half an hour since he sat down and fired up the program. One word, backspace. Three words, backspace. One fucking sentence, he fucking backspaced. He let out a growl of frustration as he pushed back from his desk, rubbing his eyes as if the pain would clear up any part of his brain – preferably the one that didn’t make him sound like a five year old storybook. He might as well have typed “The wife is a sadist who accidentally killed her husband mid-fuck.”

Grabbing his robe, he quickly tugged it on and padded over to the kitchen to pour himself a blistering hot cup of coffee. His answering machine had picked up seven missed calls, probably from his editor cursing him out for missing his calls.

He couldn’t be bothered to listen to any of them or even handle his editor’s desire to tear him a new one when he was so tempted to do it himself. His last book had been published a few months ago. Usually, by the time one was stocked up on the shelves, he’d be working on the next as he cashed in whatever the latest one was making. However, with the last few miserable months, everything he printed looked like a shit stain on a piece of paper. Even his editor, who was down to his last string of patience, thought so.

Things used to come naturally to Namjoon. All the sophisticated whatnot, all the carefully intricate plots that wove themselves onto the blank pages in fabricated fiction. He didn’t know what happened to him. He’s never had a muse except for his own messed-up life so it wasn’t possible that (as what his readers and critics believed at least) his inspiration had evaporated into thin air.

Namjoon perhaps knew what had been happening, what he saw from three books away. But he wasn’t about to fucking admit it because that shit didn’t happen to the genius, versatile writer, Kim Namjoon. Whatever he wrote turned into gold, selling nearly as many copies as the holy Bible. If his jittery nerves wasn’t enough evidence of his problem, then the coffee cup shaking in his earthquake of a hand was. As the realization sank in, he was finally hit with the cold hard truth.

Kim Namjoon had hit writer’s block.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Why do you still like Touka? Her character has been a huge let down in re. She hurts Kaneki without reasons, she refused to help Hinami escape from Aogiri and her relationship with kaneki (after part 1) has been nothing but toxic

Why do you still like Kaneki? He’s a mass murderer who pretends to be a vigilante, confessed he only cares about people if they are within 5 meters of him at the moment, can do absolutely nothing himself, and was fine with letting Hinami rot in literal prison for close to a year.

“Letting Hinami escape from Aogiri” is fucking rich, anon, please check yourself. Hinami is her own woman, responsible for her own decisions. Nothing we’ve seen suggests she was there against her will. Aogiri wasn’t mafia, she could walk out if she wanted - lots of other ghouls did when it first started to wobble, which was specifically mentioned in the Rushima arc.

/HAPPY EASTER/

/ DONT REPOST, PLEASE REBLOG /

*APHRODITE98WAVE*

in bruges colin farrell: a soft irish potato, round and smol. needs many hugs cuddling comfort love. moody, bad at maths, sad, deserved better. may or may not be dead. eyebrows. 

fright night colin farrell: what the fucking flying fuck happened here i mean jesus christ this dude t h i s  d u d e what the F U C K happened what the h e l l oh my god even ur grandma is blushing he smiles and u burst into flames the fuck is wrong with you my man why u rubbing apples on ur chest how did so much change in 3 years this is NOT OKAY im yellign the fuck ?? is happening fucking fuck time to fucking die holy hecking hell im sw e a ti n g aaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

ガラスと守護

/ DONT REPOST, PLEASE REBLOG /

*APHRODITE98WAVE*

for memory’s sake my ocs consist of:

aquamarine + moonstone + peridot (gems)

kid + jake (human)

enoch + finn (human)

echo + morty + winnie (witches)

eugene (son of satan)

caprice (goat boy)

vodka (actual vodka gijinka)

emmett (”fish” boy)

momo + torrance (elf like witches)

öt (tall five eyed armless black mass)

kip (human)

zeke (human)

cytus (human)

bo (bird sprite)

aero + ace (pokemon trainers)