Summary: Humanity’s on the brink of total destruction. While everyone is dispatched for what was told to be their very last fight, Jean feels the urgent need to tell Mikasa what he had been thinking all along.
When All This is Over a jeankasa fanfic by a jeankasa fangirl - - “Mikasa, wait!”
Hearing his voice, the young woman whipped her head around. Already under pressure from the dispatch, she snapped, “Now’s not the time. We have to go.”
Jean scrunched his hands before replying, desperately, “Just hear me out. It’ll just take a second.” Just then, yet another building got smashed to pieces just a few blocks away.
Mikasa swiveled around to the blast and back to him, a worried look on her face. “But—”
“—What is Eren to you,” Jean queried, in all seriousness. His eyes glinted in the setting sun, shining like golden orbs.
Instead of taking his question seriously, Mikasa glowered, “…You stopped me just for that?”
Her directness caught him off guard and he fumbled through his next sentence, “No, I—Fuck. I… I just need to know.” He looked away, feeling more hopeless than before.
There’s a moment of silence between them, a moment big enough for Jean to think she disappeared. However, she responded just how he dreamed she would, “He’s family. Now let’s go—”
“—I want to be your family, too.” The words rushed out of his mouth, spilling their guts onto the battlefield. Months of holding back his deepest thoughts erupted all at once, racking his chest with a near anxiety attack.
He said it.
There was no going back.
Instead of ignoring him like she always did, Mikasa backed away and immediately hung her head. A blush spread like wildfire across her cheeks before she realized it. Stuttering, she retorted, “What? Stop joking around.”
The sound of a building collapsing came at them from a closer distance, but Jean’s attention was all on the woman in front of him. How dare she tell him to stop joking? Did he look like he wasn’t serious? Jean was so flustered he couldn’t even get his thoughts organized. It was like they were all crowding around the tip of his tongue. ”This isn’t a joke! Mikasa, when all this is over, all I want is a chance. I want to be your family, too, but not the way Eren is. What I’m trying to say is—What I mean is—fuck, this isn’t making any sense. I’m just screwing this up.”
Both his cheeks burned with frustration. This was his only chance, and he felt it slipping away from him. How long had he rehearsed this? How many nights had he played this scenario out in his head?
Too many times to count.
Jean’s head was turned when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Shifting his eyes forward, the boy was entranced by pools of dark gray staring at him in understanding. “Jean, I get it,” Mikasa whispered.
Her hand left his shoulder as he straightened, and Jean said nothing. Instead, he extended his hand toward her and waited. There was nothing on his face except pure determination, determination to get everything out before it was too late.
Mikasa regarded him for a moment before taking his hand and giving him a firm grip. Her fingers stayed wrapped around his when she reassured him, “When all this is over… I’ll think about it.”
Doing something he had never done before, Jean yanked Mikasa forward and kissed her like he meant it, holding her head steady with his other hand. The small squeak from her was her only protest, unleashing the tornado of butterflies from his chest. Her lips were completely chapped and nothing like he imagined.
They were better. They were so much better.
Almost regaining control of himself, Jean pulled away and kissed her forehead. Fuck it. He couldn’t help it. He couldn’t stop himself. Just one taste of her had him going completely mad. Breathing heavily, he rested his forehead on hers. It was then that he realized she made no move to stop him this whole time. Through a smile on the crossroad of smugness and elation, he whispered, “That’s all I want.”
Mikasa nodded through a shade of red before slowly backing away. Turning swiftly, she grappled the next building and flung herself toward the fray.
Jean watched her go before unsheathing his swords with a newfound passion. Pausing to take a deep breath, he touched his lips with the fingers she grasped and whispered through his palm, “You’re all I want.”