jean blazer

3

Happy tdov from your local trans insect whisperer

(he/him)

[image desc: 3 selfies of me in my wheelchair wearing a button down with a bee print, a velvet blazer, black jeans, and metallic nude lipstick (1) me buttoning the top button of my shirt (2) mr with my blazer falling off my arm (3) me with my head resting on my hand an laughing]

How to spot a POT when you’re out

While I was sugaring I spent most of my time freestyling. After a couple of months I became a pro freestyler to the point that I started getting regular dudes to by me things.

So to help out any ladies who are moving over to the freestyle world I would like to give you some of the ways i would spot POTs while out. I’ll even talk about how I get vanilla men to buy me what I want.

Do remember that this isn’t a 100% successful all the time. You will make mistakes and you will find some bad POT even with this list but don’t let it discourage you.

Let’s start with something simple…

Where are you seeing him

If you see a man while you’re at a Gala, fundraiser, nice restaurant, or a private event he’s probably a sure thing. But if you see him at burger king, the local mall, or at a public event either walk away or enter with caution.

I met my last couple of SDs at some private events I got invited to. They turned out to be the sponsors of the event so I knew they were the kind of men to give money and give they did. My next sign is…

His business card

Not only is this giving you the info you need to screen him but the quality of it tells you the quality of the business.

I’ve done graphic designing before and let me tell you it’s not cheap to print a nice business card. If it’s thick, with raised letters, info on the back, and has gold on it than it cost a good amount of money.


Another thing to look for is his job title because not all are the same and all of them don’t have to be CEO titles. I personally like Founders and Co-founder but I’ve had a couple very giving Executive directors too so you never know.

Let’s move on to some basic signs…

How is he dressed?

I know this is broad so I’ll break it down.

Does his suit fit?

Men who have high paying jobs always have to look their best which means 9 times out of 10 they re wearing a suit. But because many men are trying to fake it till they make it, you have to make sure the suit fits literally.

If his suit is slipping off the shoulder, to long in the arms, a little big on him or worse wrinkled then pass. You want to spot a tailored man; trust me even if it’s off the rack a wealthy man will get it tailored.

Just look at this SwagUp

Is the material good quality?

We’re all women who love buying high quality outfits, so I know you all know what good material feels and looks like. I’ve found myself shopping for SDs just to know what certain suits and clothing felt and looked like.

Good quality suits are based on thread counts kind of like bed sheets. The higher the count the softer and more silk like it feels which means the more it costed. My favorite high end shop for men is Brooks Brothers hands down but if you want to see some great examples of high quality mens clothes go to blacklapel.com

Does he have nice shoes

This a pretty obvious one especially if you know what real leather looks like. But seeing that a lot of millionaires now are tech heads, and weed growers I urge you all to know what the latest sneaker wear is excluding Jordans. Any man can own some Jordans but not all men can buy one of Gary V’s new Kswiss shoe line before it’s on the market.

This also goes for clothes too. Be sure to know what a good quality shirt and jeans looks like for wealthy men. I’ve seen many tech CEOs go to private events with jeans and blazer that cost just as much as a tailored suit.

Is his watch expensive?

We all know most guys are rocking a Rolex but that’s not the only watch that’s expensive. Many men I dealt with wore mainly Cartier, Bvlgari, Hublot, and Patek Philippe watches (as well as other accesories). These brands come in different styles but they all cost a lot of money some are in the millions.

As I mentioned with the clothes styles there are changes in style due to the type of men who are making millions now. So don’t get turned of by rubber bands and smart watches because they can cost just as much. Look up the Tag Heuer watches they are a high quality smart watch and you can tell them apart from others.

Does he have simple but expensive frames?

Not many women think about frames but as a person who love buying new sunglasses every summer I’ve started to learn my frame brands. When I go to these presentations and notice a man with fancy glasses I always make it a point to tell him I like his (insert brand) glasses. This has always equalled me getting a business card.

So for those who don’t know, look for frames by Catier, Lindberg, Karen Walker, and Tom Ford. Of course there are many designer options for glasses you can easily recognize but if you know the ones that no one else picks up on it can be a great ice breaker.

How he grooms himself

A wealthy man isn’t necessarily a healthy man but he’s always we’ll groomed. They upkeep themselves at all times and keep all their grooming appointments. Of course there are men who aren’t always clean cut but they’re still groomed.

Their hair is always styled, yes even in if they’re in dreadlocks, their nails are usually cut and filed, his bread line will be lined up, and his skin will more than likely be soft. Some men have softer hair than I do sometimes because their products are way better.

Originally posted by gurl

My old SD would by bulks of moisturizing soaps, and lotion to keep his skin from drying out. His hands were so soft that it put my hands to shame. Of course you can’t see that from across the room but whenever a man introduces himself he will shake your hand and you will get to feel. Please exclude having soft hands if you find out his job is more outdoors but even they can have soft hands too.

How he approaches you

How a man approaches you can show you where you have an advantage or disadvantage.

Slow = Time saver , Fast = Time Waster

Now from what I’ve observed whenever a man is really quick to come over and give me his number he’s usually also very quick to do everything else. Men like that usually don’t want long term arrangements so I don’t really waste my time with them.

Now a man that comes to you, ask you questions, and arranges a meet up while giving you his number is more likely to be a SD. Intentions are always shown in snippets starting from the day he meets you to the third date which is my arrangement time limit so watch for signs like this speed example.

I had one guy walk pass me like this and I melted in my seat

Originally posted by exist-in-mind

Talks about himself = Be a listener

Ask lots of questions = Be mysterious

If you meet a man and he’s talking about his work and his accomplishments a lot, one of three things are happening.

  1. He’s trying to show off and you can get lots of gifts from him.
  2. He’s trying to impress you and you can start equating his impressiveness with how much attention you give him.
  3. He just wants someone to talk to and he might be willing to pay you to be a sympathetic and intimate listener.

Now if the tables are turned and he wants to you to talk more leave some mystery with the answers you give. If he ask you where you live you can say “ This is my hometown but I’ve lived in many cities after I was done with school.” Giving broad answers like that will not only help keep your identity safe but it will leave you with more stuff talk about at later dates.

Mystery will always have your POT wanting more which means more dates which equals more money.

Interaction with others

The one thing I have to say about this is watch how he treats people who serve him because that shows how he could or/will treat you. You are providing him a service and if he doesn’t respect that at a small scale he won’t respect it at a big scale either.

Last but not least my last sign for spotting POTs is…

Is he approaching you with a ring on?

Most married men who are trying to entertain me are looking for some kind of escape or excitement. So when I hear them complimenting me, sharing stories, and looking me up and down I know I have a POT. Now if he’s good or bad is seen by the previous signs but more than likely he wants to pay for your time.

As many might know married men pay more due to them having more to lose but they also have less time to give (unless legally separated). So if you don’t mind a ring get your flirt on and make your money.

Originally posted by imaginepace

Vanilla men

How I get regular men to buy me things is actually very simple but you have to pick the right man.

You know those guys you see that try to stunt about how successful they are and the guys you see faking it till they make it. Thats the kind of guy you’re looking for.

So you want to go to places they go to make this work (ex. Club VIP, Networking events, Artsy events, etc.).

Before I go out to these events I do the following things:

  • Do my best natural face makeup look
  • Wear somethings that shows all my curves
  • Wear comfy statement heels (yes, they do exist)
  • Wear my hair down
  • And put all the good smells on.

Once presentable I will go out to these event and flirt it up. Once I get my first drink from a man I start to ask for something a little more expensive and if he gets it I’ll have officially started the cycle of giving.

On our first date I always pick the place and “introduce him” to something new. I usually pick a place I go to treat myself anyway just in case he’s not as giving and tries to split the check. But if he’s gets through three dates like this with a gift (that I ask for) at the third I know I can get him to keep giving to me.

I had guys buying me stuff like drake did Nicki lol

Originally posted by hellaa-pink

This is how I do it but I’ve heard and seen different methods so if you have any please share.


I hope this was all helpful and look forward to my next post.

Much Love T

It’s All Fun & Games (pt. 1)

( ‘till somebody loses their mind )

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Drabbles

Summary: In which you and Jungkook attempt to fake a relationship for revenge and end up with a lot more than either of you expected.
Genre: Angst/Fluff, Fake Dating!AU
Word Count: 4,072
Author’s Note: 12 fucking pages of notes and outlines and ideas have led to this. Please enjoy. Title taken from Taylor Swift’s Wonderland. I’ll try to upload part 2 within the next few days depending on the response.

.

To say you are completely floored would be an understatement as you unconsciously curl your fingers tighter around the phone pressed against your ear, confusion and questions settling itself across your features as you try to put a rational thought into this situation only to come up completely short because—!

“What do you mean you’re going to be late?” You demand, trying to keep the nervous touch out your tone, but it’s hard to sound casual when your heart starts to pound a little quicker at the thought of plans not going the way you had once envisioned it to go. “You realize the only reason I’m here is because you insisted that I had to come with you!”

“I’m really sorry (Y/N)-ah!” Hoseok says from the other side of the line, at least trying to make an effort to sound apologetic. “Class ran really really late, and there’s traffic. There must have been an accident or something.”

“I knew we should have just gone together,” You huff out, high heels tapping loudly against the sidewalk pavement as you continue making your way to the restaurant. As much as you would rather simply wait around for Hoseok to arrive to the scene, the idea of just sitting in your car makes you feel slightly congested. While you would be slightly uncomfortable in the restaurant given the company you are about to surround yourself with, it’s better than sitting in the dark.

Keep reading