janitor what

That one fake Rick’s haircut felt awfully familiar.

this isn't very funny I just wanted to do it
  • [The Janitor and the twins are having a meeting with The Lady]
  • [The Runaway wobbles in, looking scared]
  • The Janitor: Seven? What are you doing in here; this meeting is for adults.
  • The Runaway [sniffling]: I-Is Six dying?
  • The Janitor: Now, why would she be dying?
  • The Runaway: I-I went to go wake her up...a-and there was blood all over her bed!
  • [everyone in the room becomes awkwardly quiet]
  • The Runaway: I-is she dying?!
  • The Lady [standing up and slamming her hands on the table]: IT'S CALLED A PERIOD SEVEN IT'S WHERE A GIRL BLEEDS FROM HER VAGINA AND IT'S ABSOLUTE HELL FOR FOUR TO SEVEN DAYS AT A TIME EACH MONTH
  • Six [in the background]: *wheezes*
2

There was a time before the Pocket Mortys craze when C-382 and D-416 actually got along pretty well. 

Fourth Floor

➸ Working overtime on the fourth floor  

Word count: 3.1k

Genre: smut

This was a lot longer than I anticipated. Bring me the holy water!

Originally posted by namjoonsgurl

Namjoon couldn’t help but glance at you for the tenth time within the past five minutes. You would taunt him with the way you would open your legs to reveal your black lace panties before standing up to make your way over towards him to ask him something stupid. Every time you were next to him, you would bend down to meet him eye to eye just enough to reveal your cleavage and hot pink bra, but not enough to make it obvious that you were flirting in such a way.

Even now, as you opened your legs once again, only for him to see, you made your way towards him, a small, playful smirk running across your lips. You swayed your hips seductively as you lightly bit your lower lip, getting closer and closer to him.

“Mr. Kim,” you began, doing your usual meet him eye level, “I’m having trouble with understanding how the printer works. Can you assist me in the printing room? Teach me how to use it?” Your eyes glanced down at his lap, clearly staring at his slowly growing bulge.

He swallowed. “Of course,” he said, a small growl following. He pushed back, getting up from his seat before pushing his chair in. He clicked the computer screen off, eyes scanning his desk to make sure none of his personal belongings were seen.

Even if Namjoon was about to fuck the girl of his dreams, he still had to make sure nothing valuable was out on display for his coworkers to steal.

Finally, he followed you past several other cubicles on the office floor before entering the elevator lobby. To his left was the way hallway that led towards the printing room, to his right, the restrooms. He watched you, continuing straight for the elevator.

You looked back at him, a seductive smile revealing itself to him. “Fourth floor, Mr. Kim,” you said, pressing the elevator button. The doors immediately opened with a ding, you raised your brows expectantly as you entered the elevator. Namjoon was quick on his feet as he embarrassingly rushed for the elevator, practically diving in the elevator and barely dodging you as he walked to the back of the elevator. He cringed in embarrassment before turning around and staring at the lobby. You pressed the fourth-floor button, and the elevator doors closed with another ding.

The fourth-floor. That entire floor was dedicated to accounting. That entire floor had gone home for the day. No one would really be on that floor except for the janitor, but he tends to have earphones on, music blasting loud enough for the entire floor to hear it if it were completely silent. Namjoon knew because he went down there after hours while working overtime just to have a quick smoke. Opened the window, sat in someone named Tom’s chair, and stared out at the building lights as he took several long drags.

That’s how he met you. You caught him smoking and gave him the biggest lecture of his life about how smoking was bad for the lungs and how it leads to blah blah blah. He really wasn’t paying attention because man, were you a beauty.

He never knew you worked on the tenth-floor with him until you followed him back to the elevator, asked him the floor he worked at, and stared at him wide eyed when you told your discovery. You even sat diagonal from him. Could he be any lucky?

Keep reading

soft reddie high school au

ok so!!! i really love the idea of a super smart eddie x punk(??) richie?? it’s Wholesome. it’s pretty long,,, iM SORRY!!


  • So, Eddie is a total mathlete in high school. For some odd reason he just really loves his math?? He has won awards and medals for Derry High School Mathletes.
  • Richie is the kid who sits in the back of the class and chews gum very obnoxiously. He couldn’t care less. OR SO EDDIE THOUGHT
  • One day during calculus, Eddie goes to sit in his desk but physically can’t because Richie fucking Trashmouth Tozier is sitting with his feet up on the desk. We all know Eddie isn’t going to pick a fight with him!!!
  • Eddie for some reason really doesn’t like Richie. He thinks he’s a loser (but in reality, they’re both big losers so??)
  • When Richie looks up and sees Eddie, his face instantly lightens up and he smiles a big bright smile
  • Eddie could literally feel his heart skip a beat. He realizes that Trashmouth has a really nice smile. A really nice one.
  • “Sit down.” Richie invites Eddie.
  • “Uh,… You’re in my seat.” Eddie mumbles and is all flustered.
  • Richie is supposed to be some mean punk and why is he suddenly being so nice to him??? Eddie is very confused.
  • Richie explains to him that he’s having a bit of trouble with calculus and would like some help.
  • He wants Eddie to tutor him!!!!!!
  • Eddie doesn’t want to so he says no (He secretly really wants to)
  • As Eddie is walking back to class, Richie desperately grabs his wrist and practically begs Eddie to teach him
  • Eddie sighs and finally gives in. So like a few weeks later, they have been studying together at the public library for a few weeks.
  • Eddie started noticing little things about Richie: his freckles, the curve of his nose, the way he taps his pencil against his head when he can’t solve a problem…
  • Basically, Eddie puts two and two together and he realizes!!! He’s screwed!!!! He likes Richie Tozier!!!
  • “Eds? You okay?” Richie asked all puzzled. Eddie then realizes he’s been staring at Richie. And being super obvious.
  • “I-I said don’t call me that!!” Eddie stammers in response.
  • When Eddie gets home that night, he realizes that Richie and he would never work out. They’re just too different. Eddie decides to avoid him so that his feelings would go away.
  • Richie ultimately gets really hurt. He doesn’t know why Eddie is avoiding him at all costs.
  • “You know you like him, right?” Bev Marsh, one of Richie and Eddie’s classmates asks slyly.
  • Richie was very confused and goes, “Well yeah… We’re friends.” 
  • Poor dense Richie…
  • It’s been almost three weeks since Eddie started avoiding Richie, and frankly, Richie has had enough. He realized that Bev was right. He was in love with Eddie Kaspbrak.
  • He didn’t know how he didn’t realize it sooner?? Richie was always staring at Eddie when he wasn’t looking. His heart was always beating madly when their fingers touched mistakenly at the library. He was in love!!
  • One day, when Eddie is leaving school for the day, he gets grabbed by the wrist and pulled into a janitors closet.
  • “What the hell!?” Eddie exclaims in confusion. Was he being kidnapped?
  • “Tell me why you have been avoiding me.” Richie demanded, emerging from the closet’s shadows.
  • “Richie? W-What are you doing here?” Eddie could feel his face reddening
  • “Do you not like me?” Richie asks, his voice sounded genuinely hurt.
  • Eddie realizes what he had done. He practically ruined their friendship!! And worst of all, he was still really in love with Trashmouth!!!
  • There’s an awkward silence and then Richie just sighs in defeat. He lets Eddie’s arm go and heads for the door
  • Suddenly he feels Eddie’s lips crash on his own. A stunned Richie wraps his arms around Eddie’s neck and kisses him back
  • As they stop for air, they rest their foreheads on each other.
  • “You know we’re going to have to explain why we were in the janitor’s closet together, right?” Eddie laughs
  • “I don’t care” Richie fills in the distance one more
  • Then from that day on,,,,, the Mathlete and the Trashmouth were dating.

arthureverest  asked:

do u have any autistic Finn headcanons

short answer: yes

long answer:

-knows the stormtrooper rules inside and out and gets Very Anxious when ppl don’t follow them. not in a killing ppl way, just in a ‘u know we aren’t supposed to leave the mess hall for another thirty-eight seconds ur gonna get in so much trouble’

-develops a special interest in the workings of the starkiller base bc it’s So Cool and look at all the things they’re so rad and the nice thing abt stormtroopers being faceless is that more than a few engineers have yet to realize that That One Stormtrooper Who Fixes All Our Problems is fn2187

-finn is literally the Almighty Janitor

-fn2187 echolaled (idk what the verb of echolalia is so i made it up) on the sounds of his letters fitting together long before he met poe

-finn makes Way Too Much eye contact and also tends to stand a bit too close to ppl when he talks and rey picks up the habit from him and so does poe eventually and soon they are an overwhelming, looming trio

-finn flaps with stiff hands, more vibrations of his arms than anything else, or flaps his arms like a bird while he walks

-finn picks up binary incredibly quickly, but no other languages so bb8 translates for him and he translates for bb8

-he is very good at doing voice impressions and sometimes speaks in binary when basic isn’t working for him (his accent is pretty terrible, but only the droids know that and they aren’t telling)

-he and rey train together and then stim together, usually by spinning, supporting each other before they can get too dizzy to stand

-he’s so used to keeping a tight schedule that his internal clock always reminds him when it’s mealtime and he reminds rey bc sometimes she forgets that ‘im hungry’ and ‘i can go eat something’ are related

-he learns how to fly and does it pretty well but he’s always better at being a gunner. it’s two steps: point and shoot, and not a whole lot of precision and calculating, the kind he’s really good at

-he sings almost constantly

-he and poe sing duets almost constantly, or at least hum together

-he rocks with the movement of starships even when he’s on land

-he grew up in a very controlled environment so he’s hypersensitive to most temperature fluctuations but he loves it

-he goes to bed incredibly overstimulated most days, but experiencing a brand new universe is worth it

-there’s only room in the bunks for one person, so poe sleeps on top of him like a big cuddly weighted blanket and it’s the best sleep finn’s ever had

3

(((Before I get going to work here’s a couple of sketches of the Pokemon some of The Maws inhabitants would own.)))

(((If I have time tonight I’ll do The Chefs, The Ladys, and The Guests))) (((and maybe The Ferrymans, The Grannys, and The Treasurers)))