jamie x paul


You just want to be noticed, you want to be the centre of attention, to have special treatment, to make your mark. But it’s all just a performance. All of it. You perform for me, for your solicitor, your doctors, your nurse, your psychiatrist, even your family. It’s all just one big performance as protection against the dreaded black hole of your heart. Well, guess what, Paul, it’s time to grow up. It’s time to take responsibility for what you’ve done. Let’s stop this pathetic charade.

Oh my god, don’t ever die. I have so much more to tell you and I’m not interested in telling it to anyone else. I’m not saying I’d be helpless. I mean, I’m bright and fairly good with money. I mean, I guess I’m cute, right? You would say, ‘What, are you kidding me? You, my little friend, are a perfect example of beautiful.’ And so I am. Because I am nothing more or less than what I see in your eyes when you look at me. Do you know how long I waited for you?

My mother used to say I was too picky or afraid of commitment, and that’s why I was still unmarried by the age of almost 30. But the truth is, I was just looking for you. Do you know how close I came to being a narrow, cold, mistrustful woman but you have given me a life so big and full and good… and fun. I don’t even know what we do really besides clean up and complain and wish we were sleeping but, with you, somehow: fun.

And I’ll tell you a secret: when we got married I couldn’t imagine still wanting to be with anyone all this time later. But I do. It’s a miracle to me. You are a miracle. You’ve made me happy, which is something I never, ever thought I’d be.
—  Jamie Buchman, Mad About You

Two days of Marvel movie promo images:

  • Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool in Deadpool (2016)
  • Charlie Cox as Daredevil in Daredevil (2015)
  • Jamie Bell as the Thing in Fantastic Four (2015)
  • Paul Bettany as the Vision in Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)
  • Ben Hardy as Angel in X-Men: Apocalypse (2016)
  • Corey Stoll as Yellowjacket in Ant-Man (2015)
I Saw Harry Potter and the Cursed Child on Saturday

Ooohhh boy there are gonna be spoilers below. Also, I enjoyed the fuck out of it so if you know you will hate it whatever, this post is not for you.

a) Scorpius Malfoy is even more of a precious 100% babe than he appears in the text from the moment he said ‘I’ve always regarded the pepper imp as the King of the confectionary bag’ I would have gladly thrown myself off a cliff for him and that is all down to the incredible acting by Anthony Boyle. 

b) Noma Dumesweni is a perfect Hermione and If you don’t agree you can fight me tbh. She has the 'oh Ron why are you such a red-haired dweeb look’ down pat. 

c) Hermione and Ron are in love in every single timeline in the play and it is adorable @God thank you for giving me the knowledge that even if Hermione and Ron were split up by any number of ridiculous circumstances they would still be eye-fucking across a room at all times.

d) on that note, the relationship between Scorpius and Albus is the gayest thing I have seen with my eyes that was not explicitly gay. The scene where they forlornly pine over each other on staircases is accompanied by lovey-dovey music. Both of them sort of reminded me of my 14 year old lesbian self who was madly in love with my best friend and not really sure if everyone felt like that towards their friends. They are so totally smitten with each other. 

e) one day they are going to Realise that not everyone gets that feeling like a hundred Catherine wheels are going off all at once in your stomach because your friend stood that bit too close to you and I wish there was a play just with all the awkward Christmases where Albus and Scorpius are smitten and Draco and Harry are the two most ridiculously over-involved parents of all time and try to out-do each other in parenting 

f) Ron gives Albus a love potion and Harry doesn’t understand why and in the playtext it read sort of like a plot device but honestly watching the play I felt more like Ron was giving it to him because he understands exactly what it’s for and Ronald Weasley knows all too well what falling in love with your best friend at fourteen looks like and he is not going to let Albus drag that shit out for three fucking years like he did, no siirreee. 

g) ALSO honourable mention to Paul Thornley who made me genuinely scream with laughter while acting Albus under the influence of polyjuice pretending to be Ron because it was brilliant 

h) also honourable mention to the man sitting next to me in the audience who went ‘whaaaaaaaaat?’ really loudly every time a major plot point happened which improved the experience of Part 2 tenfold thank you for your shock and awe audience man. 

i) Okay I need to talk about the special effects. When Harry leaves his office via the telephone box he’s wearing a cloak and he walks right up to it and you see him pressing some numbers and then it says ‘goodbye Harry Potter’ and the whole cloak gets sucked up at once into the telephone box and even though I logically I know it was done with trapdoors and things it was still like watching magic happening in front of my actual eyes and I did want to cry a little bit.

j) the dementors were terrifying. Honestly. They’re made out of some form of grey gossamer fabric and they have long spindly fingers and the sound effects of their breathing is genuinely terrifying. I was sitting in the front row of the dress circle and one of them floated right up close to me and my 70+ year old father who was sitting next to me nearly crapped in his pants. 

k) also Jamie Parker as Harry is fucking incredible. The soul baring conversation  Harry has with Dumbledore’s portrait is 100 times worse watching it on the stage and it actually went some way towards soothing my hatred of Dumbledore. Harry was crying so hard, proper sobbing, and I wanted to cry myself it was tough to watch. 

l) oh oh I forgot to mention the lighting and sound which is criminal because it was really well done. When they’re going back in time they rewind the sound of the scene so it literally sounds like they’re going backwards and when they get to the new time they do something with the lights so that the whole stage looks like it’s moving like a water droplet has just dropped in and made waves. I could watch it over and over all day, it was so clever. 

m) All the actors pronounce Voldemort like Voldemor without the t, which was fine that’s what JKR said it was supposed to sound like, but it was slightly off-putting to start off with. 

n) everything is significantly less ridiculous on the stage versus in the text. It just works better. I hope they release a film of the stage show soon so it’s obvious how much better it is on stage. 

o) Ginny gets to talk about her Tom Riddle experience to Harry and how Harry helped her to cope just by understanding that what she needed was a friend and my skin cleared, my crops flourished, I was pleased I had bank holiday Monday to bask in the beauty of that moment

p) if you think the bit with Harry watching his parents die was a tearjerker JUST WAIT until you see Jamie Parker acting it on the stage. JUST WAIT. 

q) for that matter, Hagrid picking up baby Harry made me cry so hard I actually felt myself choking on my own tears

r) some of the questionable plot decisions are still tragic but I enjoyed the shittiness of those plot points and honestly the rest of it is so great it more than makes up for it