james you are drunk

Imagine a very drunk James Potter determined to destroy the giant squid after Lily said she wouldn’t go out with him if it was a choice between him and the giant squid. 

Because Padfoot, it has to go. I can’t have the Giant Squid as my competition. It would swallow me whole and I’m too fit to die. Also I don’t plan on dying before I get Evans to say yes. Now help me carry this cauldron of sleeping draught to the lake.


The film was shot in eight weeks, and required no retakes. During the scene where James Stewart hiccups when drunk, you can see Cary Grant looking down and grinning. Since the hiccup wasn’t scripted, Grant was on the verge of breaking out laughing and had to compose himself quickly. Stewart thought of hiccuping in the drunk scene himself, without telling Grant. When he began hiccuping, Grant turned to Stewart saying, “Excuse me.” The scene required only one take. [x]

  • I think the best headcanon for wolfstar is that Sirius was drunk and angst and actually only came out to James because of that. Like it was really late at night in maybe fifth or sixth year and both James and Sirius have had like ... twelve to many shots of fire whisky. And at some point, between rousing choruses of Mind at Work from Hamilton and Seasons of Love from Rent, the boys start drunk talking. You know, when you start to talk about all your deepest secrets and suddenly it all comes spilling out. So James confesses his major insecurities to Sirius, not like Sirius didn't know but it's nice to know that James trusts him enough to tell him face to face, and Sirius pauses him in the middle of a quidditch self consciousness rant and just kind of blurts out; "I'm gay and I had a crush on you in third year."
  • And James's reaction, because he's drunk of his AAAAAAAAAAAASS, is to smile and lean in to Sirius. Sirius let's out a huuuuge sigh of relief, maybe he's not as drunk as we thought, and they fall asleep cuddled up to each other.
  • Cue my super insecure wolf baby walking in on the adorable scene. Now he had his suspicions about Sirius's sexuality but he figured that if Sirius was going to say anything he would do it in his own time. But seeing the two of them like that, sleeping with their faces super close together, very k-dramaesque, has his heart cracking for no apparent reason.
  • So he starts avoiding both of them.
  • He also, in his month or two of avoiding them begins to notice how coupley they act.
  • James is constantly pulling Sirius in for really drawn out hugs and glancing over at the other boy with a sort of soft worry in his eyes. Sirius is as playful as usual but there's something gentle in the way he looks at James. Something almost romantic.
  • What he doesn't see is the worry in James' eyes when he stares at Sirius' slowly thinning cheekbones. What he doesn't see is Sirius crying himself to sleep at night.
  • What he does see though, is Sirius sobbing in the dorm room one day during classes.
  • It's transfiguration in a mo' but Remus figured that was enough time to pop back to his room and grab his stuff. At first he's not sure he should talk to the boy but eventually he works up the courage to go over, because his and Sirius' friendship didn't mean nothing.
  • And Sirius sits their sobbing into his shoulder for the entire period.
  • They don't talk about it afterwards but Remus starts hanging out with everyone again. It's the gang all back together and Peter could not have been more relieved.
  • It's a couple weeks before they talk about it. It's a couple years, three months before graduation to be exact, that Sirius finally gives an honest response.
  • And their relationship takes work. It doesn't just magically start and they get whisked into a fairy tail. But it's a solid one and it lasts a long time.
  • And then Sirius gets sent to AzkabanZ

Originally posted by tony-starkes

Theme Song: Stay With Me by Sam Smith

Requested by the one and only awesome @gothamsblackqueen

Summary: You and Jim have been very best friends(along with Bones, of course) since the beginning of the academy after just sitting by Jim in the shuttle to San Francisco and hitting out. You’ve been through every hell. Nero, Khan, Krall. Even his death, you cried and went after Spock to stop him from killing Khan to get his blood for Jim to be alive. 

It’s now after the Altamid and Jim is really feeling the stress rank as extreme on his head and shoulders. You find him drunk in a bar and he says he loves you, leaving you stunned an concerned about everything you and Jim have. 

Word Count: 1,069

Warnings:Uh….fluff???? XD 

@gothamsblackqueen  @outside-the-government @imaginenterprise


You blink at him in his partially-drunk state. You see, everyone would think he’s normal until three minutes into talking to him. And that’s exactly what you did, with final realization he was drunk. 

He hadn’t gotten drunk since, oh you don’t know, maybe eleven months ago-almost a year! Good god, the Yorktown incident was really killing him, wasn’t it? This is what Starfleet and space has done to your best friend. The one person you cared about most. 

You turn away from the on-ship bar and leave, tugging at your coffee brown leather jacket a bit. 

“Y/N, wait!”

You ignored him. You headed up to your room. He loved you?

Honestly, you were starting to realize everything. The random moves and actions you thought you did were weird-it was because you liked Jim. The every once in a while stares-you liked him. All the times you’ve spent with him-you’ve grown to love Jim.

An exhale escapes you. Once in your polished clean bedroom, you go to your bathroom and pull off your clothes, stepping into the marble shower, into the warm water falling down peacefully. Warm water caresses you down your soft S/C skin. You slather yourself down and body wash and shave and whatnot while you’re in intense thought. 

You thought about him, and only him. With positive and with a stand-put position on it, you thought that the drunk-ness wasn’t intense enough to make him say stuff like that. You had studied alcoholic effects on the body, that wasn’t enough when your eyes had finally caught sight of only three brandy glasses. You know that it took six, at least, to get him to the point where he was obviously drunk. He would’ve said crazier things at six glasses. 

You finish your shower and put some nourishing oils in your hair and moisturize your face before you throw some lounge clothes on being yoga pants and a soft baby pink sweater. 

It takes you another two hours contemplating on your bed and doing tons of random things, but you finally realize you love him too.

First thing, you blink. Second? The love would make his life even more complicated. Girls could have relationship standards. And despite you not having many, you still worried that could change. No, a relationship with him would stress him out more…You didn’t think it’d comfort him for a good amount of time. It was like one-night-stands. They came and went, and the relief and fun of it didn’t last forever. 

You hear a ring at the door. A deep exhale escapes your nose. Why would it be anyone other than Jim?

You let him in, of course. He looked better, now. Not exactly drunk anymore. 

“I-I was drunk-I’m sorry. I-”

“Jim, don’t be sorry,” You stand up from your bed. You walk to right in front of him. 

“I just-I just….” Jim trails off. You knew he was stressed. “Yes, I do love you, but I don’t think you feel the same, that’s all! It was stupid of me to think I could drink all the pain from Yorktown away. Y/N, I’m sorry.”

Again, you’re stunned, and even more worried. He was rambling a storm for you, and you felt this was your fault. You hadn’t comforted him even when he said no he was fine many times in the past. You should’ve pushed-or should’ve you? This was a swirling storm inside of your head-you were so worried for Jim. That was it! You loved him. You really really loved him. 

“Jim please, don’t stress yourself out. There’s nothing to be sorry about, you were drunk.” There was then a pause. His beautiful blue hues were still distressed. 

“I love you too,” You confessed. 

His eyes brightened into an intense fire of blue. He looked relieved to hear this. 

“You do?”


“Even with all the stupid mistakes I make?”

“Jim, that’s human. That’s everyone-everyone makes mistakes. Don’t be ashamed about it.”

There’s a moment of quietness and you had to find something to cure the awkward quietness. You hug him.

Jim is internally stunned for a second, then comforted. He hugged you too. He felt relief. 



“Would you, um, stay with me in my quarters?”

You nod, despite your head against him. “Of course I will, Jim,” You say in a speed of a heartbeat.


You both enter his quarters. It was barely messy. No food from this night here and there or some clothes on the floor. Mostly, it was tidy. 

He pulled the covers loose after he came out from the bathroom in some gray pajama pants and a shirt. You knew it was most likely he slept in boxers, but you guessed he was wearing clothes for you to be comfortable. 

You were about to sit down when you heard Jim say ‘oh.’

You turned your head. He was holding a teddy bear. You actually never knew Jim had a teddy bear. He told you just about anything else. 

“It’s just an old bear. My mom gave it to me when I was a kid.” Jim played with it in his hands a bit. “I named it George after my dad.”

You nod. He probably thought you thought it was really kiddish to have a bear. 

“But I don’t need it anymore.”

“Jim, you can keep your bear,” You reassure him. It didn’t bother you a bit-you thought it was cute and sweet. It was probably good for him if it made him feel better, anyways. 

“I have you.”

Your mouth shuts and you weakly smile. Usually, you sleep in a loose sports bra with shorts or leggings. You take a breath and slowly pull off your shirt. You knew Jim wouldn’t get…aroused. 

“If you’re more comfortable sleeping in boxers, I don’t mind,” You say. You see Jim nod. He decided to just pull off his pants and shirt, revealing his smooth chest and mildly-muscled shoulders. 

You both lie down and it’s a moment before Jim slowly starts to wrap his arms around you. 

“Um,” You accidentally blurt. Instant guilt. He yanks his arms away. 

“I’m sorry-”

“No, no…I like it.”

Honestly, he’s relieved. Slowly, once again, he wraps his arms around you and you snuggle deep down in his arms. 

“Thanks for staying with me,” He whispers in your ear. 

“Any time.”

You started sleeping in his quarters with him from then on. 

Prompt: “Closer songfic w/ Jim?” -Anon

Word Count: 2,517

Warnings:  Mild Spoilers for Into Darkness and Beyond. Set during the first 20 minutes of Beyond, for the most part. Mild sexual content.

Author’s Note: I didn’t do the entire song, since there’s a lot of repetition. I picked out the most significant lyrics. I had so much fun writing this, I really hope you all like it!

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Mine - James March x Reader

REQUESTED:  Can you do one where reader comes back to James completely drunk ? Love your work =) - ANONYMOUS

Anon, James ran away somewhere with this. Like it started out funny, and then it went places I was not intending. Sorry. Hope you like it though. :)

Your friends had pushed you out of the cab in front of the hotel, leaning out the window and promising to call you the next day. You stumbled in through the front door, waving at Sally, who was sitting on one of the lounges in the lobby.

“You’re wasted.”

“Me? No way.” You slurred.

“Oh, he’s going to be really happy with you.” Sally rolled her eyes, her voice thick with sarcasm.

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