jake's dumb characters

Since people really seemed to like the saga of Olaf Olafson, I’m gonna tell you guys about one of my own characters, Brenan the Punch Wizard.

My friend was running a Dragonlance game back in college, and I jumped at the chance to not have to DM for once. I ended up rolling up a Neutral Good farmboy mage whose proclivity for magic was discovered relatively late (like… late teens) and so compared to the other wizards he was a total hayseed who knew fuckall about the theory of magic. His familiar was an his old farm dog ffs. An Australian Shepherd with a red neckercheif.

Well, he passed his test and became a White Robes mage (as you do when you’re not a shithead) and started going on more frequent adventures. Brenan quickly established himself as a pretty excellent hard-counter to enemy meatheads, with his suite of nonlethal spells targeting their usually weaker Will save. He was a good kid. He really didn’t want to kill anybody. We took a lot of prisoners with Brenan around.

Eventually, though, we started running into the Plot, which meant- among other things -running into a lot of Evil Wizards. Their Will saves were usually pretty damn high and so there was little chance of catching them with Sleep or Charm Person or the like. But almost all the spells that targeted their Fort save were kinda brutal, and the Reflex saves weren’t much better. He could counter-spell them sometimes, but not always, and it didn’t solve the problem, really. Just put the onus of murder on our Solamnic knight, running up and stabbing the cackling Black Robes with a huge fuckoff sword. That wasn’t very satisfactory, either. What’s a near-pacifist to do? Fireball?  Finger of Death? It was a dilemma.

Until Brenan picked up a null-magic zone spell. I can’t remember the name of it. But you cast it, and for a fairly sizable area, nobody could cast any spells. The enemy mages and clerics would start to fret, but they felt secure at least that Brenan was equally screwed.

Only, he was a farm boy. With a Str of 16 and a feat in Unarmed combat.

By the time that campaign ended, Brenan had personally captured over a dozen renegade Black Robes and dragged them back to the Tower for judgment. They hated and feared him- most of all because he didn’t even have the decency to kill them. No- every last one of the world-bending megalomaniacal sorcerers he defeated had to live with the knowledge that they’d been beaten by a farm boy prodigy and his mean right hook.


High Farseer Alethea, on foot.

Got this awesome mini for my birthday courtesy of the ever-amazing @iratescientist.

I’m very slowly getting better at painting skin; like most things in mini painting the trick is lots of translucent layers and patience.

Probably use this mini as a “counts-as Eldrad Ulthran” in friendly games where my opponent isn’t looking forward to facing a jetbike heavy list.

Preliminary Dark Eldar Characters

Lady Erys Voidtalon- Archon

Rough background: Born as Eryssa Siamun, daughter of Meshadi Siamun, younger sister of Keuna Siamun, she found life aboard Craftworld Tel-Rethan to be entirely too strict and limiting. She tried channeling her vicious streak into combat paths- Striking Scorpions and Howling Banshees alike -but could not contain herself aboard the Craftworld and was ultimately banished.

She fell in with the newly formed Caliranite Empire fostered by Tel-Rethan’s sometime ally Craftworld Lonad-Shair, and was instrumental in shaping the group of shock troops who would come to be called Void Talons. She remained with Caliran for a time, but ultimately she strained even their greater tolerance for hot-headed cruelty, and they arranged for her to travel to Commoragh, where she might find aeldari more suited to her.

There taking the name Erys Voidtalon, she moved between the arenas of the Wych cults and a number of Kabals before finally forming her own Kabal, the Voidtalon Reavers. Leading them into Realspace and usurping the leadership of the Tel-Rethan aligned “Venomtide Corsairs,” Erys has at last come home- though none who remember her old name would begin to suspect that this black-souled pirate was once their own princess, least of all her niece- the current High Farseer, Alethea Siamun.

Likes: Being The Boss, Plunder, Sowing Terror, Razorwings (birds), Razorwings (jets), Cheating Like A Pirate, Being Virtually Worshipped By A Gaggle Of Half-Born Void Dogs (think the War Boys and Immortan Joe)

Dislikes: Obligation, Fair Fights, Rules

Dame Vitria Shadefall- Succubus

Rough Background: Popular arena combatant, then she got a tiny scratch on her face. Now she wears a harlequin-style face mask because she’s so fucking Extra she considers the scratch Disfiguring

Likes: Combat, Drugs, Combat Drugs, Showing Off, That Thing Where You Slice Someone Into Pieces But There’s A Beat Before They Fall Apart Into Beef Stroganoff, Capris and Uggs Apparently

Dislikes: Armor, Guns, Unworthy Opponents

Arakhos the Flenser- Haemonculus

Rough Background: Uhhh… MD from Commoragh University?

Likes: Pain (any), Suffering (others’, mostly), Unnecessary Surgery, Maniacal Laughter, the art of H. R. Geiger and Gunther von Hagens

Dislikes: Restraint, Medical Ethics, Boredom

Settled on a name! Going for “Khaelion,” per several suggestions and a good conversation with @kingerblogs. Thanks for everyone who offered suggestions. Only a bit more to do on the model and I can show that off, but I’m getting tired so it’ll probably have to wait until tomorrow. For now, here’s his brief character writeup.

Khaelion Emberscar- Klaivex

Khaelion has been at Erys Voidtalon’s side since her Craftworld days- usually her lover, often her ally, and often her rival. They met while both trying to walk the path of the Striking Scorpion, millennia ago, and found in each other someone who understood the bloody passions that drove them both. Over time, their passions and vexations have deepened into something that is both all-consuming love and bitterest hatred- for each other, for themselves, for their inseparable, infuriating bond.

Khaelion is a vicious and deadly swordsman, favoring paired, uniquely heavy demi-klaives. He fights in a distinctive style- relying on speed and brute force more than pure technique as he leaps from one target to the next, dispatching them in a flurry of heavy strikes. Some who witness his style might call it reckless, but he has frequently delighted in accepting the challenge of a more technical or defensive fighter, and leaving them in bloody heaps.

Likes: Blood (others’), Being Superior at Anything (especially combat), Total Personal Freedom, Inspiring Despair, Getting Paid to Murder People, Erys Voidtalon

Dislikes: Being Told What to Do, Arena Fighters (all flash and no power!), Not Getting Paid when he Muders Someone, Erys Voidtalon


Banshee Mask for my Wraithknight!

Took a couple nights’ work and more than one failed attempt but I finally got a look I’m reasonably happy with. Thought about adding a forehead piece to make it look more like a Banshee helmet but fundamentally don’t want to undermine the “large blank faceplate” look Wraith units have going on. Tried to cut some thin strips of plasticard and twist them into something resembling hair, but it didn’t look good, so I left it off. Maybe I’ll revisit those ideas down the road.

But for now, the Valarayen twins are back on my shelf, plus one banshee mask and some touch-ups and a bunch of snow for their base.


Wraithknight Valarayen

Piloted by the former Howling Banshee Sydri Valarayen, and containing the spirit of her fallen twin sister Lirana Valarayen, this Wraithknight bears the colors and sacred nebulae of Craftworld Tel-Rethan. Each nebula marks a waypoint in their millennia-long journey through the void, a guidepost lighting the way to their ultimate home as foretold by the great Farseer Iolanthe Siamun.

Sometimes I think about how in the Pilot Holt said “we’ll start with him”, referring to Jake, when asked how he was going to proverbially whip the Nine Nine into shape. Like, the statement is so … not harsh, exactly. But very clearly indicating that Jake isn’t good enough? For Holt’s standards, you know, because he wants their precinct to be The Best and to DO their best and Jake just doesn’t seem like he takes anything, least of all his job, seriously.

And I think about that statement, “we’ll start with him”, that sounds so harsh and blunt and yet looking back now, how much has Holt done for Jake in terms of guidance and support? How much love and time and patience has Holt spent that honestly Jake desperately NEEDED, and, coming to the halfway point of season three, HOW MUCH has Jake grown because of Captain Holt? Because Holt took that statement and instead of giving up or trying to bully Jake into getting his act together, he spent so much time and effort and dedication subtly guiding and supporting and encouraging Jake in all the right things. He was strict and disciplined and harsh at first, yeah, but you notice that as Holt gets to know Jake (and the rest of the nine nine) better, that edge of defensiveness in his leadership disappears entirely.

And his determination to carry out that statement? (Because I’m sure somewhere along the way Holt amended his sentiment, no longer intending to “fix” Jake, as it were, but rather gently nudge him in the right direction, and look at how much good that’s done? LOOK AT HOW FAR THEY’VE COME?? And not only has Holt taught Jake, he’s also LET Jake teach him, and is more and more willing to loosen up and indulge in some of Jake’s goofier shenanigans because he knows how much it means?? Aaaah)

Jake’s like 68% less of a Mess now than he was at the beginning of the show, and oh my goodness, he had so many good qualities there to begin with but now thanks largely to that “we’ll start with him”, those qualities have been given an outlet to truly shine through constructively and Jake’s just come so far and I’m so proud of him I bet Holt’s so PR O U D of him and I’m so highkey about the character development and relationships on this goofy comedy show but you know what Captain Raymond Holt said “ we’ll start with him” and look at where they are now


These are for kaijuslayer because all of his characters are awesome. We have (in order L - R) Varian, Alkurah, Atriya and Masano, all of whom don’t get enough love but especially the latter (I’ve never drawn the last 3 before at all, which is why I’m sorry in advance if I got the colours or outfits or anything wrong yikes).  

4/7 - There will be 3 more soon, when I blow through some other work, but these were literally the most fun I’ve ever had doing portraiture. :D His characters are all so gorgeous and wildly different from one another. Go follow him if you don’t!

(Hope you like them Jake!)

iratescientist  asked:

4, 12, 22, 23?

I already answered 4 and 22 but I’m happy to answer 12 and 23. :)

12.) Does your Inquisitor exile the Grey Wardens or recruit them?

I recruited them, mostly to give them a chance to redeem themselves. They got more or less ‘used up’ hunting down the remaining darkspawn though and I feel a bit bad about that. Only a bit though because jesus shitting christ.

23.) What class specialization do they take, if any?

Alethea is a goddamned Reaver. You need no defense against a dead opponent, right? With all the dragon-hunting she does, she’s an amazing Reaver. Stockpiles of dragon blood to last for damn ever. 

motheatenscarf  asked:

5, 6, 7, 10 and 20

5.) Does your Inquisitor recruit the mages or Templars? (did they conscript or ally with the mages / did the rebuild or dissolve the Templar order?)

Mages always. When confronted by a choice between an oppressed people and their direct oppressors, it’s not a difficult choice, especially when the templars are the ones hunting Dalish Keepers and Firsts as apostates. Accordingly, even though Fiona made the biggest cock-up she’s probably ever made by bringing in Tevinter/the Ventatori, I recruited the mages as allies. Alethea grew up with magic as an accepted part of the clan, as the fading remnant of what her people once were. She grew up with Templars as the most obvious face of shemlen boogeymen. Not a tough call for her.

6.) How does your character feel about becoming Inquisitor?

She doesn’t want it, never wanted it, and only wanted to go back to her clan. But she’s the one with the Mark, and so she’s trapped. She eventually becomes closer to Vivienne than I expected, largely because Vivienne understands what it means to have to perform a social dance upon a knife-edge, or risk losing everything and/or making things worse for her own people. 

7.) How do the Inquisitor and Hawke get along?

They have a similar ‘skin of the teeth’ approach to problem-solving, and both consider themselves funny, but they’re fairly different. Brenan Hawke is a wry, sarcastic asshole who covers his genuine emotions with scathing wit with everyone but his closest friends. Alethea is convinced that bad puns are the height of comedy, and more overtly awkward. They respect one another for what they accomplish, and neither one wants the other’s life at all

10.) What would the Nightmare demon have said to your Inquisitor to rattle them the most, if anything?

Most likely it would pick at her fears that her position and rapid rise to power she never wanted has endangered elves throughout Thedas, specifically Clan Lavellan. “The Chantry will march, and Dalish blood will water the ground in the wilds even as the alienages burn, and all because of you.”

20.) What’s their favorite location to travel to, if any?

Gotta say Frostback basin. The Avarr are so fun. Their approach to spirits is hands-down vastly the healthiest out of anyone we’ve met at all in the entire franchise. They might not be much for indoor plumbing or literacy, but Alethea considers them the most civilized (or at least relatable) humans she’s ever met. Besides which, it’s fresh mountain air and pretty forest without the crushing despair associated with, say, the Emerald Graves. 

Coming in second is actually probably the Hissing Wastes, because they are so empty. It’s a good place to go and think, to be surrounded by the night time desert, the moaning wind, the endless sand, and just feel small again. It is very difficult to feel small in Skyhold.