jack you are a little shit

i found this post in my drafts and have ZERO memory of writing it (thank u alcohol) so im gonna put it in my queue lol
  • ok but imagine 
  • Bitty comes out to his parents but he doesn’t tell them about Jack, thinks it’s for the best, maybe to ease his parents into things or maybe to keep the pool of People Who Know as small as possible 
  • and like yeah Ransom and Holster are super oblivious but Suzanne Bittle is not, not when it comes to her son, because she is a certified Nosy Southern Mother and she can see he’s been acting differently, happier but quieter, always on his phone and blushing when she asks about boys
  • and he talks about the team a LOT 
  • Jack’s one of his best friends and he’s just started his NHL career, so of course Bitty’s never gonna shut up about Jack
  • (Same goes for Shitty and law school. And eventually Ransom and med school. Dicky is proud of his friends and wants everyone to know. He gets that trait from Suzanne, she understands)
  • but he keeps talking about this one Boy, how sweet he is and how his smile is like a sack of puppies and how bitty’s always making this boy do things with him like baking and getting froyo and going shopping and Suzanne is like. Yes. This must be Dicky’s secret boyfriend. 
  •  the next family weekend or whatever, Suzanne demands to meet this Chowder boy who’s stolen Bitty’s heart
  • Bitty is both confused and mortified

Keep reading

A Good Thing

“Bobby, you can’t keep doing that to him.”
Bob raises his eyebrows, putting down his fork. “Doing what, Alicia? Corralling our son into talking about his crush?”
“Exactly.”

Or, A fic about Bob and Alicia noticing Jack’s feelings for Bitty before even he does.


Bob Zimmermann is kind of messy, only a bit of a smart ass, and just a tad hard of hearing. Yet even without perfect hearing Bob can’t miss the affection in his son’s voice when talking about a certain line-mate.

Bob Zimmermann is many things, but he is no idiot.

“Did you get that paper done for your…what was it again- american pie class?”

Bob looks over his shoulder just in time to see Alicia send an appraising look from the couch. He catches a hint of a smile.

He winks back and she rolls her eyes in return.

Bob turns again to the large window, the white light blinding him for a moment. The large expanse of grass is still littered with snow, lining the way down to their lake. A blank sky hugs the horizon.

“Women, food, and American culture, Papa.”

“Right. So how’d you do on the paper? Did Eric help you out?”

Keep reading

The player on center ice

A Check Please Soulmate AU


Yes, another one. This is a one-shot.

Warnings: time-travel. Don’t try to make sense of it, it’s just fluff.


Sometimes, your soulmate came back in time to give you a pep-talk. Not that you remembered who they were and what they said, but the feelings remained. 

This story is set during Bitty’s first year. 



Eric was about to quit hockey. He would quit hockey, then quit Samwell altogether, and go back to Georgia his tail between his legs and prove right every single person that said he wasn’t strong enough for such a manly sport.

Jack had chewed him out again- in front of everyone.


(more under the cut)

Keep reading

7

There was also a really awesome match last night where yeah, my team lost (their team was frighteningly good okay) and we lost by a large enough margin that I didn’t even manage to get to the objective to have any objective time, but there was a Blackwatch Reyes on the other team. And I seriously got the impression that me and this other dude (each of us was the highest level person on our team) were just in our own little world trying to kill or one-up each other.

AND THEN. And then. He had to go and be a good sport about it so I can’t even get annoyed. Blargh.

(wherever you are, dude, I love you. GGWP.)

Because They Can (Holy trinity x FemReader) fluffy drabble

Originally posted by pewdieberg

(( gif not mine - cutes ))

(A/n): ahhhh kill me

Request:  Request! Fem!Reader is a popular gamer who collabs a lot. After several hate comments about how “a girl can’t play videogames,” her friends Mark, Felix and Jack cheer her up through a Skype call. If you do this request, I would really love it if you’d tag me though I understand if you would prefer not to :D

Warnings: lmao swearing

_____

“I DON’T UNDERSTAND.”

“JUST GO AROUND THE BEND.”

“THAT’S LIKE THE SKETCHIEST THING I COULD DO.”

Not being able to coordinate yourself, your character ended up going backward by your control. You did not, in anyway, trust the front bend. Regardless of what Felix was trying to tell you.

You ended up dying.

“Oh, for fuck sake.” you grumbled, allowing yourself leeway to fall back in your chair.

“What,” breathed Felix “did I tell you.”

Together, Mark and the Irishman laughed heartily and looked into their set up cameras. You couldn’t help up pout at their joyous outbursts, hearing Felix tune in as well.

“I don’t know!” you began to defend, sitting up right again to reload the game.

“If I were to go down the front bend, I would’ve gotten jumped by 1A. I mean, they have lighter weaponry, but they had more soldiers.”

Beginning to mutter, you finished with “2B had less people so I thought I could just… slip by.”

Mark spit a bit before he laughed again, and said:

“I don’t think that’s how that works, hon.”

You only scoffed and challenged him with a “We’ll see.” before starting up a new map and inducing them to join.

Though the game had already started, and Jack and Felix were continuing commentary; you were slightly distracted by the comments of your stream.

Something’s about girls and games.

“Jack, if you round the corner onnnn…” you drawled for a moment before making up your mind “your second left, there is spare ammo in that wedge.”

“For sure?” confirmed Jack, clicking away at his mouse.

“Yeah, I remember. But, don’t pick up all of it, you won’t have room in your pack left.” you explained further “Utilize the space as much as you can so that you can pick up things like torch batteries. Yes, you will need them in the third map; second half.”

Mark seemed to be confused for a second, peering into his camera lens “Have you played through this before?” he asked.

“No.” you answered “You can just assume, because in that map, the only places to ‘hide’ in are the forest caves. Which are dark.”

Mark and Jack pushed out a chorus of ‘oh’s and thanked you heartily. Felix and yourself laughed, and you allowed yourself to glance at the chat once again.

“Should we take maybe five minutes to read over some things in the chat?” you suggested. The three boys agreed.

“Suuure thing.” sang Sean. Quickly, he leaned back in his chair and stretched himself fully; making inhuman groans with his mouth. You winced quaintly and chuckled.

“Uhhhmmm..” Mark sounded uncomfortable “these aren’t very appropriate.”

You were struck by confusion at first, offering your lens a childish look. You then checked, and read several comments in the below chat.

‘she’s pretty dumb for getting killed so easily lmao’

‘idiot move (Y/n)’

‘why girl’s shouldn’t play video games ^^^ they will get you killed smh’’

‘airheaded bitch wtf’

Well, shit. You wouldn’t have guessed people were still this immature. Have to admit though, you were a little peeved they totally bypassed everything you had just said.

“They mean me…” you mumbled half hearted.

“Yeah,” Felix said, sounding detached “they do.”

The four of you kind of sat in an uneasy silence. The chat slowed, some viewers even slightly apologizing.

Until one:

‘yea and? now get her off the stream ffs’

Ouch.

Mark was the first to admit how rude that was, giving his camera lens an uneasy stare. Jack followed suit with a disapproving look- the kind that tore out the hearts of his viewers.

Felix- well Felix killed it. He went on a lengthy rant about how sexist the comment was and how much of a douche that made them for saying it.

He went full rage.

“Do you want to… continue the stream?” you mumbled, silently hoping they would say no. You were alright, just feeling a little defeated at the moment. You felt as though you couldn’t hold yourself in front of any audience any longer.

“Not really.” said Mark, still glaring at his camera “Not at all…”

“Not anymore, I don’t.” agreed Jack.

The atmosphere hung thickly around the situation. Countless times, viewers that were actually trying to enjoy the stream apologized for the words of the ignorant. You almost felt bad.

But not too bad when you reached up and shut down your stream recording camera.

Felix, Sean and Mark did the same.

Silence. The skype call and webcams remained.

“(Y/n) don’t be sad.” said Felix. He smiled at you.

You managed your own grin and told him you weren’t sad. Afterwards, you thanked him for standing up for you.

“Don’t be a sad pupper.” giggled Mark effortlessly. He was really, heavily worried. Though, the male wasn’t sure it came across in his voice.

“No, no I’m not sad… defeated maybe.” you clarified.

Felix was a little heart broken. You were one of his closest friends, he didn’t need to see- or hear you sound so… deflated.

“Well they are just fucking… fucking dickholes.” he demanded stiffly.

“I swear to god, if any other small brained, chapstick looking mother dickbag says one more thing, I’m moving to America and starting a rally.”

You laughed quietly at the Swede’s declaration “Mother dic-”

“Mother dickbag.”

That made you at least chuckle a little, along side Jack and Mark. You were glad to be charmed by Mark’s deep falsetto of a laugh and Sean’s warm welcoming giggle.

“Hey hey don’t worry, she already lives by me. I’ll punch everyone in the face and then give her a hug.” stated Mark.

“I’ll regulate who can and cannot comment of her videos- only the very best may speak to her.” offered Jack, sounding proud.

You giggled some more, joined by the entire group.

“You guys are like my protection squad…” you uttered, filling with joy at an alarming rate.

“Well I mean,” said Jack.

“If we aren’t-” continued Felix, as he laughed.

“Who will be?” Mark finished, winking into his webcam.

“Only my three knights.”

_____

(A/n): beauty

I have given up on doing them in order. As long as I get them done so I can allow requests again, I’m fine

Anti theory

Okay I don’t do theories, I just draw and shit but this kinda caught my attention. (Bare with me)

Someone pointed out that in the Danti collab that Anti wasn’t wearing his gauges, jack replied with a little wink wonk which makes me think this was done intentionally and solely for something to theorize about.

Anti first showed up in jacks Sister Location series, the one episode where Anti first spoke his voice on camera was the episode where Baby captures you and locks you in a suit, solely giving a long lecture on how she “pretends”.

Pretending. Anti was not wearing his gauges in the clearly big EVENT of a video, so why purposefully leave out one of Antis iconic pieces of his look?
You remember the other event that’s going on..? The Fanart event? Jack presenting that video was dressed almost exactly how anti normally dresses, talking about bringing the community to draw Fanart just after an anti video dropped. This would motivate people to drawing Anti right? Anti is an attention seeker and feeds off that shit, maybe we’re giving him more attention? To make him powerful or whatever haha.
To the point of his look in that video, there were no gauges. He wore a black tee and dressed as typically anti, but no gauges? Anti could have been PRETENDING to be Jack to start this art crawl, to bring more attention to himself in the coming days..
( or jack is just being a kind hearted soul and left his lil accessories at home, who knows :3)
Again, I don’t make theories, just a tHouGhT haha.

You member how wiishu said her appendix story was boring? Well i decided to fix it. She ain’t lose it cause it decided to be a little bitch and say “imma just stop and fuck yo shit up lol” naaaah. u see she waz in re7 ya’ll just ain’t see her and the bitch ass son of jack and margerite “can’t remember that bitch name” did one of dem puzzle shits and she wuz locked in a room with a knife and a bomb. That bitch ass son was like “yo, i burried a key to the door in yo appendix. Why? idk fam i waz high as shit but if you wanna live you gonna cut that shit out.” And you know what? She did that shit fam cuz signe ain’t a lil bitch. Here’z proof she did dat fam.



Now not only iz this bitch a fucking artist, photographer, and a fashion idol but she a doctor. Dr.stooplstein fake ass doctor bitch ass better move out the motherfucking way. This mofucka can do appendix surgurey she just didn’t tell yall cuz we’d be overwhelmed by the level of cool she iz. I’m onto u fam i’m onto u. @wiishu

2

“Wait wait wait….You want me to hit you? Like in the face?”  He honestly doesn’t know how or why this is suddenly being asked of him. Maybe he’s dreaming. Or drunk. Or both.

“C’mon kiddo. Do me this one favour.” Jack pouts. An expression that seems odd for a man like him, despite Rhys really not knowing anything about him…other than that he’s a bit…weird. He must be if he’s willing to let a complete stranger he met once on a plane stay at his place.

“Why?”

Already bored of all the questions, Jack starts hopping on the spot with nervous energy “Why? I dunno why. I dunno. Never been in a fight. You?”

“No…but t-that’s a good thing.” Rhys isn’t sure if he wants this conversation to go on any further. It’s late, he’s tired, and he just wants to try and sleep. But his curiosity, and the fact that he’d have nowhere else to stay, keeps him from just walking away right now.

“No it is not! How much can you know about yourself if you’ve never been in a fight.” Staring at Jack, the apparent masochist, as he shuffles around on his feet; seemingly annoyed at Rhys’ lack of enthusiasm to his request, Rhys is beginning to question his recent sleeping arrangement for the night. What the hell has he gotten himself into?

Jack just stares back with a grin, beckoning Rhys to come closer. “I don’t wanna die without any scars. So c’mon! Hit me!”

Sighing and putting down his briefcase, Rhys edges a little closer.“Jack, this is crazy. I-”

“Then go crazy! Who gives a shit.”

Rhys squints, licking his lips. His skin buzzing with nervous adrenaline. “So you just…you just want me to hit you.”

“That’s right.” Jack edges closer too, tilting his head at the taller man. A glimmer in his mismatched eyes.

“Like in the face?”

Jack locks his gaze on Rhys, being sure he has his full attention before winking. “I don’t know. Surprise me.”

Doubtful of the sanity of the man in front of him, and the three pitchers of beer they shared making him more lenient to grant Jack’s apparent desire to be punched in the face, Rhys clenches his fists.

“…This is so fucking stupid.”

Soooo I’ve got a Borderlands/Fight Club au in the works. You guys will be seeing a lot more of this~

also my writing is terrible. I’m sorry

anonymous asked:

Hello!! I absolutelly love your blog and your voltron headcanons, do you have any about Pidge and Allura? (either alone or interacting with each other)

  • i feel like allura sees herself as this great potential mentor to pidge whereas pidge’s thoughts on allura are basically “my weird friend who tried to kill me with lasers once”
  • the brains and the brawn
  • pidge has so! many! questions! about how the castle ticks but allura knows jack shit about technology
    • “but if you don’t know how any of this stuff actually works, how do you use any of it during battle?” “i kind of just…” *waves arms, makes whooshing noise*
    • it’s magic pidge leave the girl alone
  • those friends who get a little too real while roasting each other
  • allura: “so pidge… got any deep dark secrets you wanna share? ;)” pidge: “yesterday i used hunk’s toothbrush to clean weird gunk out of rover’s wiring and i didn’t wash it afterwards”
  • neither can lie to save their lives
    • allura asked someone what their bloodthirstiness was on a scale of 1 to 5 and pidge’s gender was the worst kept secret on the ship i mean
    • they’re the absolute worst team up if you ever need undercover work done
    • shiro makes that mistake exactly once
  • “hello lance. pidge asked me to inform you to….. ‘git gud’?” *turns to pidge* “did I say that right?”
Uprising: Retcons and Analyses

It’s my lunch so forgive the fast formatting but here we go:


Retconning:


1. Jack’s reason for enlisting is now confirmed to be the Omnic Crisis.  Which changes a number of things.  In his original backstory, Jack “wanted to return to the family farm after a brief stint in the Army, but was swept up in SEP, where he met Reyes.”  But now that that’s gone, this makes Jack more “worldly” and more “motivated to fight for change” in the world.  “New” Jack is much bigger, much more global than “original” Jack was.  His sights are not set on returning to Indiana - his sights are set on saving humanity.


2. Genji was not in Blackwatch as far as I am aware.  What is interesting is that this proves that not all Blackwatch missions were undertaken alone, since Overwatch would have also been involved in his rescue (when know Angela was on-hand or close by).  Blackwatch and Overwatch also engage in joint training sessions.  We can see that even though Lena is the main focus of the training, someone is monitoring Genji’s systems in the background.  This effectively CONFIRMS that - at the very least - Jack Morrison was aware of SOME of the Blackwatch missions.


This also heavily implies that - coupled with the “complaints by the Japanese government about Blackwatch” - Blackwatch was involved in the fall of the Shimada clan.


3. Liao is either entirely scrapped or has been reworked.  I personally think it’s the former.  They haven’t been mentioned in any comic thus far, and Torb and Rein consider “the old team” to consist of the Strike Team plus Angela.


4. I’m feeling fairly convinced that the promotion angle is getting massively reworked or toned down.  Gabriel’s light banter and sass over Jack’s statues, the lack of voicelines around the promotion, the fact that it is LITERALLY never mentioned anywhere outside of the “original” article makes it fairly clear that - at least on the surface - nobody thinks Gabriel is mad about it.  Gabriel himself acts nonchalant about the differences in their ranks.


5. Lena’s new timeline is VERY SHORT.  Her time as an active agent would have been relegated to the last year of Overwatch’s existence (Present time = 6 years since Fall of Overwatch, Comic takes place “7 years ago”).  This means that propaganda/promotional posters like the one in the Hero animation PROBABLY DON’T EXIST.  Which is like.  Really subtle next level retconning.


Analyses


1. “They’re not extremists, Gabriel - they’re TERRORISTS.” How relevant.  I’m convinced Gabriel and subsequently Reaper are now firmly in the Chaotic Gool-Neutral-Evil alignment.  His whole speech about Omnic Rights is FASCINATING for his character because it shows that he is actually sympathetic or understanding of their behaviors on a different level than Reaper previously implied (“Tin cans, a dime a dozen”).  This is VERY GOOD.  His subtle implication that humanity - specifically the UK - has forgotten the origins of rights and freedoms is MASSIVE for him, and reflecting on that through a “minority being abused and denied rights” (a minority he ACTIVELY FOUGHT AND DEFEATED) is HUGE.  This really pushes the theories of Reaper as a “Chaotic Good-Neutral” agent much further, especially if we consider that he may see Talon less as terrorists and more as “extreme anarchists.”  This really greatly aligns with Sombra’s whole mortality alignment and Los Muertos’ “ideals.”  Gabriel is 100% aware (and self-aware) of the issues.


2. Gabriel almost certainly does not want Blackwatch directly involved in this uprising.  His crew is already in hot water, and he has to think about the safety of his agents and their plausible deniability in the face of a UN investigation.  Gabriel’s lines about McCree “being on vacation” and “nothing you need to know” reads as him trying to defend McCree in the event something goes awry with the higher ups, while also giving Jack and Ana the ability to deny information as well.  This, unfortunately, PUTS A MASSIVE TARGET ON HIM AND HIM ALONE.  Gabriel being blamed or implied to be responsible for the fall of Overwatch by other people (namely higher ups) looks more and more realistic and possible.


3. Jack and Gabriel’s relationship (along with their friendship with Ana) is indicated as being deeper and extremely intimate.  Things to note: Jack now being the only character to call him “Gabe” (which Sombra references), Jack being able to pull information out of Gabriel even after Gabriel and Ana engaged in some sassy banter, Jack referring to him as “Commander Reyes” in his discussion with Lena, Jack using the picture of the three of them to remind himself of “what’s important.”  I’m not gonna say this is confirmation of a full on relationship between them, but they are absolutely close.  This, combined with Reaper’s “I know your every move before you even think it” line from Old Soldiers and Reaper calling him “Jack” even after the fallout, is extremely telling.  This is not an ordinary relationship between “coworkers.”


4. Jack listening patiently and calmly to Lena’s speech, being reminded of himself and his passions for defending and helping others…is very good.  Very good for his character.  A little less revolutionary than Gabriel’s speech about Omnics, but good and grounding nonetheless.  This also helps humanize his whole “you need to slow down/okay dad” lines with Tracer in the game as more cute and familial than before.


5. The new timeline is BONKERS.  HOLY SHIT.  So things have started to break down - there’s investigations and complaints against Blackwatch, and growing criticisms against Overwatch.  Other people have speculated that Gerárd has recently died based on the news headlines, but what this means is that the collapse of Overwatch happened FAST: within at least a year, Lena has her temporal problems, McCree leaves, Genji leaves, Ana “dies,” Gabriel and Jack have their “falling out,” etc.  A YEAR.  That’s ridiculously fast for an organization that’s been around for nearly three decades.  This certainly implies that the conspiracy that brought Overwatch down was FAST and THOROUGH.  Sowing the seeds of discontent quickly and efficiently, almost certainly breaking up the “joint-relationship” between Overwatch and Blackwatch within months.  That’s insane.

6.  My friend Sami pointed out that Jack’s office is simple and small - not ostentatious or large.  He literally has nothing but a desk, a massive monitor, and some shelves in there.


7. Jack being willing to step out of line for “the greater good” makes him complicit in ignoring “orders” or breaking “the law.”  This sets up a great parallel between him and Reaper, and other characters like Lúcio, the Junkers, Mei, McCree, and Winston.  And we know that the “higher ups” spun this “overstepping his bounds” as forcing Overwatch as a policing agency onto the world.  Soldier: 76/Jack not being “respected” for his hard-but-morally-correct decisions lends itself well to his jaded, bitter manner later in life.


8. GOD.  DAMN.  TEAM.  UNIFORMS.  YES.  THANK YOU.

@infinite-atmosphere LOOK WHAT YOU’VE STARTED NOW I WARNED YOU

Small pec worship drabble heavily inspired by this because wow hello can I nap on those please?




“Still working at this hour?”

“Gabe …” Jack sighed warningly as Gabriel appeared stealthily behind him – he pressed himself up against Jack’s back in a warm, insistent move that was evidently meant to distract entirely. Gabriel’s hips pushed forward to cradle against Jack’s ass, his broad torso flush against his back as he spooned up against him.  

Keep reading

Did I ever tell y’all that I got bored one day and thought AU where Jack is a literal prince as a joke and then completely failed to let go of the concept

Turns out it’s not easy to invent a royal family. Of Canada. Living in Quebec. With the last name “Zimmermann”. I basically had to reinvent Canada’s entire history and constitution just for a stupid joke and now I’ve accidentally got this extremely detailed alternate universe with centuries of history and genealogies of old Canadian families, and absolutely nothing to do with it

Some features:

  • Jack is the last in the Zimmermann line. Since no one actually knows who comes next, no one is very sure what will happen if anything goes wrong
    • There’s a centuries-long dispute between the Armistead and Chevalier families
    • There was an aborted constitutional crisis when Jack overdosed where everyone in politics panicked for a few days
    • Early in a relationship, Jack has to have an awkward “I know this is too early but I need to know if you’ll want kids because… Canada” conversation
  • He’s still known as the Hockey Prince because he insists on playing professional hockey even though he’s a prince, Jack, what are you doing?
  • Inviting his friends to the palace this is hilarious to me
    • Kent “I’ve fucked a prince but I can’t tell anyone” Parson
    • Bitty cannot believe anything about his life
    • “Shits you have to wear pants in the palace”
    • T a t e r
  • Everyone is just a little bit hesitant to check him too hard. Partly because he’s a prince and partly because his long-suffering security guards are watching and also are possibly armed
  • As a result of a minor tiff with the English royal family that included some world-class mocking on the part of then-Queen Joséphine, the Zimmermanns own all Canadian geese in Canada
    • “They can beat your swans in any fight” said Joséphine, probably
    • They also own all the Canadian geese in the US, as part of a minor clause in some treaty or another, which was inserted after a few friendly drinks. No one has done anything about it since so it’s technically still law
    • There’s a long tradition of the Zimmermanns issuing a formal apology to anyone attacked by a Canadian goose
  • There’s been a rumour for as long as anyone can remember that the Zimmermanns are secretly vampires or witches or werewolves, etcetera, depending on the variant you hear. They have never commented on this rumour
Shout out to all the people who regularly suffer from migraines

For those who have experienced the panic of that nasty, clawing little pain behind one eye and knowing what’s coming next.

To all the people who know what it’s like to have a thudding headache that makes you want to claw your way back into the earth to escape it.

The feeling of having a concrete block with sharp edges constantly rubbing the back of one eyeball.

To fear standing up from a bed or chair in case of blackouts or tunnel vision.

For those forced to pray to the porcelain god for the crime of sleeping a little too long or daring to go out and have fun.

For those who have puked till their stomachs were as empty and bile ridden as a Donald Trump speech. And yet your body still hates you.

To all those who understand the joy of a dark, silent bedroom. Or a hot, refreshing shower. Or a comfy sofa and cool towel over the eyes….and a bucket in easy reach.

To all those who know that an aspirin won’t do jack shit, but thanks for offering. Those who know how addictive Codine is.

For those who have had to give up fun activities or days out and been laid low on birthdays and special occasions because of it.

I wouldn’t wish migraines on my worst enemy, but you are strong and I send you hugs and best wishes for a speedy recovery. May your pillows be cool, your Migraleave be quick and effective, and your families be understanding.

This Life Will Have To Do

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: SMUT (Ages 18+), Unprotected Sex (WRAP IT!!), Mentions of Abuse

Summary: You’re a maiden being forced into marriage with a wealthy tradesman, Brock Rumlow, but a group of criminals crash your wedding, led by the long-lost love of your life.

A/N: I know that Alexander Pierce isn’t Brock’s father, but for the sake of this story, he is. Sorry ‘bout that inaccuracy!

Word Count: 3.7k

MASTERLIST

Originally posted by fandomnationwhore

“Oh, please, Y/N, I’ve heard enough whining to last a lifetime. Now turn around and let me zip up your dress.” Your mother rolled her eyes yet again in response to your protests.

“Mother, you’re throwing away my entire life! How do you expect me to respond?” You exclaimed, trying to keep the tears at bay before you fully lost your composure.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi, what exactly is Stargate (like, what is the plot, how many seasons, that kind of thing)? I've seen it mentioned in combination with Leverage in some of your posts, and I've sort of picked up some of the character names from being on the internet, but I'm still not sure what it actually is. Thanks!!

What a delightful question that I’m going to have a ridiculous amount of fun answering, probably using too many gifs.

First, the bare bones facts: Stargate is a franchise that began with the 1994 movie Stargate, which was then developed into the TV show Stargate: SG-1 which began in 1997 and picked up about a year after the movie ended. SG-1 had 10 seasons and 2 made-for-TV movies. There are also 2 spinoffs, Stargate: Atlantis and Stargate: Universe. Atlantis has 5 seasons, and its first season coincides with season 8 of SG-1, with both beginning in 2004, with some fun but not strictly essential crossover between the two. Universe has 2 seasons and began in 2009, after both SG-1 and Atlantis had ended. I mostly blog about SG-1, but I enjoy all three shows and will at least briefly explain Atlantis and Universe in the course of this post, FOR FUNSIES.

The basic premise of the whole thing is that there are these devices (built by aliens, OF COURSE) called Stargates, which create wormholes that allow for basically instantaneous travel between planets all throughout the Milky Way (and other galaxies as well, it turns out, but that’s later).

The movie involves the US Air Force, with the help of the BEST FICTIONAL ARCHAEOLOGIST IN EXISTENCE FIGHT ME, figuring out how to work the Stargate, using it to travel to another planet, and helping the locals overthrow the evil parasitic alien who was posing as the Egyptian god Ra in order to enslave them.

SG-1 starts with Earth humans learning that “Ra” actually belonged to an entire race of evil parasitic aliens who used the personas of various gods to enslave humans throughout the galaxy. At which point, NATURALLY, the plucky Earth humans say “fuck that shit” and also “ooh, a whole galaxy to explore, HOLD MY BEER” and start having adventures and liberating the galaxy.

Atlantis is about Earth humans finally discovering the lost city of Atlantis over in another galaxy, and the adventures and struggles they have setting up a colony there. Also, space vampires.

Universe is about a bunch of Earth humans accidentally stranding themselves aboard an alien-built spaceship that is going they don’t know where in order to find the meaning of life, the universe, and everything. It’s much darker and more sort of psychological than the other two shows. Also more diverse. I like it a lot, but for different reasons than I like SG-1 and Atlantis.

SG-1 owns my heart, because it’s the show that helped me fall in love with sci-fi. Also, it has Dr. Daniel Jackson. It wrestles with what it means to be human and ethics and all kinds of really good shit. It’s not perfect, and the early seasons especially have some pretty major issues with sexism and white savior complexes in certain episodes, but overall I personally find it more than worth it, and the main reason is the characters, who you now get to hear me yell about my love for.

Keep reading