It’s been forever since I posted about what I’ve been up to, so here are the highlights from the past several days:
- On Tuesday, I saw my dad in-person for the first time since September. We went to a Mariner’s game and it was actually really nice. Like he treated me well and we had a good time together. But the aftermath was horrible, because he then left and it felt like a good dream that never really happened and I went crashing back down the reality of not having a true family. He left to go back to my mother and sisters who treat me horribly, and he will never stand up for me or ever really be there for me. So I kinda had an emotional crisis on Wednesday and got super suicidal, and almost had to go to the hospital. Instead though I went to J’s house (the former teacher who’s like a father figure to me/who I babysit for now) and spent a couple hours talking to him and his wife til I calmed down.
- On Thursday morning I treated myself to a latte as a reward for surviving and coping with Wednesday/Thursday, and wore a very cute outfit. :) I also had therapy with K at the Emily program (I am no longer seeing the therapist who’s like a mom to me, A, because she’s not covered by insurance). The session was super hard but very helpful, and resulted in me feeling a lot better.
- On Friday I the weather was spectacular and I spent time with a friend taking pictures, drinking soda and relaxing in the sun on the beautiful church steps where I work, and it made me feel very happy to be alive.
- I went on a date that night, and it went super well and I think there’s potential with this guy like omg?
- On Saturday I slept a lot bc I didn’t get home from my date til like 7 am (oooops), then I got coffee and lounged on my lovely patio while writing poetry and talking about life with my incredible landlady. Again, I felt very happy to be alive.
- On Sunday, the weather was even MORE amazing, and I lounged in the backyard by the pool and gazebo (my house is the best okay) then went adventuring downtown, where I got an iced chai and wrote more poetry at a cute coffeeshop, and bought a gorgeous kate spade coat I’ve been eyeing for months. Because even though it’s nearly June, this is Seattle lol and the nice weather won’t always be here. ;)
Now today I have therapy with K again, then a friend is coming over to go swimming! (perks of having a pool in your backyard hehehe) What’s everyone else up to?