j fitz

“When I took this job, I made a choice. The same choice everyone else here made. This life over the other. It’s not easy. But if the time comes to make a hard call, it’s simpler.”

White regiments, black regiments, regulars and Rough Riders, representing the young manhood of North and South, fought soldier to soldier, unmindful of race or color, unmindful of whether commanded by ex-Confederate or not, and mindful only of their common duty as Americans.

John J. Pershing

“…any depression, suicidal thoughts, wanting to kill yourself?”

“No,” an easy lie, because what are the parameters? This instant? This week? This year?

The parameters are “since you started the Accutane,” implying new thoughts. But the thoughts are old, and ebb and flow inconsistently, and

Yea, I’m


And I want my prescription renewed and I’m afraid of the rabbit hole saying “Yes” would unearth. Besides, I’ve been vigilant, wary of the extensive list of side effects, the warnings plastered all over the packaging, the slip I have to leave a signature on every time a new prescription comes.

I’m tired and my joints ache and I don’t look how I feel, so

Yea, I’m


~ J. Fitz