ive literally wanted to make this for the longest time

anonymous asked:

For the supercorp headcannon let's get on with the angst: who has more nightmares? Who usually comforts who? How the Danvers and the Kents take a Luthor?

omg i am so excited i have so much angst in my soul and so much angst for these two lil nerds

  • SO i would say kara probably has more nightmares but lena generally has more intense ones??  
    • this isnt to say that kara’s are not fucking intense and terrible and usually involve, you know, the destruction of her planet, culture, family, etc, but she’s had them for what’s going on 10+ years and while she used to wake up screaming in the beginning (which, tbh, is a big reason why alex became so incredibly protective over her, even when she resented her existence, bc she was this little girl that was so far from a home that didnt even exist anymore and she was crying and scared and alex is a giant softie so of course she got up and got into kara’s bed, curled around her and stayed awake, vigilant until kara was asleep again, anyway that was off topic i just have a LOT of emotions about the danvers sisters)
      • but like its been years and so she’s sort of used to them??  and unless it’s particularly bad, she usually just wakes up a little shaken or sad but its manageable
        • that said, lena’s particularly attuned to kara bc kara often wont verbalize whats eating away at her??  she’s so used to putting on a brave face and closing off whatever anger or sadness or doubt she has and she wont saying anything so lena’s learned to catch onto the minutiae, the tiny shift of expression, the deep sadness in those blue eyes before its shoved back.  so she usually wakes up with kara, and even though she’s not always one hundred percent coherent she’s usually with it enough to figure out whats happening and pull kara against her, ground her, land a sleepy kiss to her cheek or temple
    • lena on the other hand, has not had 10+ years to adjust and the nightmares are a pretty recent development, often centered around thinking she’s got lex back on her side again only to have him kill her, or her have to kill him, or the worst yet, developed only after learning about supergirl, being somehow manipulated into killing kara herself (those are…..the Worst tbh).  she usually wakes up crying, though there have been a couple times when she’ll wake screaming and she’s so used to self soothing, to just shaking and rocking until she’s calm enough to get up and make herself some tea and down some ambien, its honestly a little bit of a shock the first time kara is around for one of these nights and she’s so worried about lena, sitting up in a blink of an eye and sort of–she doesn’t want to make it worse by holding her if she doesnt want to be touched and lena’s not really??  talking???  and kara doesnt know what to do, doesnt know how to make this better for her and she feels so incredibly helpless
      • in the end, she sort of just stays with her, just so she’s not alone until lena sort of collapses against her, crying so hard that she’s shaking and kara takes that as her cue so she wraps her arms around her and channels a lil alex and stays awake until lena’s calm, until she’s asleep again and then she stays awake past that, not sure what to do if it happens again
        • they talk about it the next morning, after lena’s cancelled her meetings and stumbles out looking like death and kara’s still got a worried look on her face even as she sets down a smiley face pancake in front of lena when she sits at the kitchen island
          • like……dont look at me bc im totally NOT crying over the thought of lena looking incredibly small, the smallest she’s ever seemed to kara, and her trying to explain what happened, trying to explain that they just happen sometimes and that kara shouldnt worry and kara like aggressively worrying and just asking what she can do to make it better when lena wakes up like that
  • a lot of the time its lena comforting kara, like she has a lot going on you know?  like she’s desperately trying to balance being supergirl with maintaining some semblance of a normal life and on top of that she’s constantly reminded of the fact that she is the only living being that still remembers krypton, that carries the history, the traditions, the culture, the language with her because while kal-el knows a bit here and there, he never lived it, never went to the festivals, never watched it die and there is no one that can relate to that, that can relate to the very specific pain of being 13 and watching everyone and everything you love die AND THEN not even being able to carry out the last thing your mother ever told you to do like kara carries so much guilt and she rarely vocalizes it and even then its never exactly about it, always by proxy, some sideways way of approaching it
    • she normally breaks down in front of alex, her go-to, her rock, but then alex is happy for once and kara can’t–kara won’t take that away from her, refuses to weigh her down with this when she knows she’s the reason it took this long for alex to look so free so she buries it deep and this goes on for months and then she has this one awful day where snapper is on her case about something that isn’t even in her control and she was looking forward to her date with lena that night when, of course, supergirl duty called and she cancelled and the alien’s just a fuckin jerk ok, just a jerk that liked to blow shit up and kara’s tired, she is, she just wants to feel okay for a little and she’s reached a point where she’s not sure if that means she wants to be kara zor-el or kara danvers but splitting the difference is hurting more and more each day and she just wants to feel okay
      • she flies to lena’s after the debrief at deo hq.  it’s nearly one and most of the lights are off when kara lands on the balcony but she also knows that lena’s first meeting isnt until the afternoon tomorrow and she also knows that she doesn’t think she can handle going back to her empty loft tonight
        • she also knows that when she doesnt stay the night, lena sleeps with her phone on the bed and lena actually picks up on the first ring which means she’s either still up working or has just finished and kara can barely tell her im on the balcony, it’s chilly, please come let me in and then she’s crying and lena doesn’t hang up, kara thinks, but then she’s at the top of the stairs, jogs down them and unlocks and slides the glass door open and then kara’s falling into her arms and lena holds her for a moment before she’s guiding her up the stairs and leaving her at the foot of her bed while she stacks her papers haphazardly and dumps them onto her dresser and later kara will think that that’s probably the biggest sign that lena cares for kara as much as kara cares for her, but then lena’s pulling back the covers and following kara when she climbs in, pulling her back against her chest and just letting her cry it out
          • i’m tired, she whispers later.  i’m just so tired.
          • then sleep, love, lena murmurs back.  i’m right here.
            • kara wakes up sometime long past when she should have.  lena’s still there, holding her, and she murmurs when kara starts to sit up i called snapper and told him that i’d offered you an exclusive on the new tablet we’re putting out, she yawns.  and that you’d be sitting in on meetings for the next week.
              • lena
              • you need a break
                • which, well, true
    • and this isnt to say that kara doesnt spend just as much time taking care of lena, but the way lena views it, she has a therapist that she pays good money to listen to her and, like, she can actually talk about things without any sort of cover story in a way that kara can’t outside a select group of people and lena is honestly just glad that she’s part of that select group and maybe that means she announces a couple of pieces of tech a little earlier than initially intended, it still fucks with apple pretty well
  • HOO BOY OH MAN OH GOD OKAY so the danvers handle it with relative grace, they really do; alex gives lena the shovel talk and, quite honestly, so does eliza, but kara’s happy and safe and that is their first and foremost worry, really, so when it becomes clear that lena is just as committed to that ideal, just as willing to prioritize kara’s well being, it’s easy enough to accept her.  it doesn’t hurt that she’s got the whole my parents never loved me! card to play, something that immediately wins over eliza ‘i’ve never met an orphan that i didnt want to mother’ danvers and lena and alex sort of bond haphazardly over That Lesbian Lifestyle and their shared drive to keep kara safe and happy
    • so while they’re wary for a bit and thoroughly vet lena, she’s eventually just kara’s girlfriend lena, rather than Lena Luthor, Sister to Lex Luthor, Daughter to Lionel and Lillian Luthor, which is???  honestly all lena’s wanted?????
    • THE KENTS ON THE OTHER HAND so honestly idk what history supergirl is working with for clark like are his parents even alive???  who knows but im going with no bc ive only ever seen man of steel and have never watched smallville and also dont care that much.  ANYWAY kara literally does not tell kal-el for the LONGEST time because she knows exactly how he’ll react and she’s not interested in having him talk down to her when she is, in fact, older than him and more than capable of making her own decisions and judging people based on merit, rather than surname.  but like…..he’s superman.  he finds out eventually.  probably by winn accidentally letting it slip (he then sends off abt fifteen thousand panicked texts to kara, all starting with IM SO SORRY HE’S JUST GOT THAT FACE AND I GOT DISTRACTED or something like it)
      • and then kara’s getting a pissed kal-el storming into catco and, well, he’s not yelling but he might as well be and kara’s eyes just about roll out of her head and she drags him up to the roof, where at least they won’t have an audience wondering why clark kent gives a shit about kara’s relationship and then kal-el’s yelling about The Luthor Family is Bad News Kara and kara’s like listen i Don’t Care (i mean, obviously she does; she knows what lex did and what that in turn did to kal-el but at the same time, he is perpetuating the same bullshit judge a book by its cover that kara has fought so hard against and he’s not even bothering to listen to her, just sort of assuming that that she will listen to him and break up with her girlfriend that she likes like a Lot, maybe even loves, and so honestly Fuck You Buddy) and it boils down to if you’re not willing to respect my ability to make autonomous decisions, then you can leave and kal-el’s like FINE and kara’s like FINE and he flies away and kara’s so angry and hurt that she spends the rest of the day in the deo training room (kryptonite off) punching everything she can
        • it is not fine at all bc while he’s got an entirely different experience from kara when it comes to krypton, he’s also the only tie she has left to her home, her family and it breaks her into too many pieces to count that he’s entirely unwilling to even consider judging lena for her own actions, or even to consider the fact that this is kara and she trusts lena with her life, her secret, and that should count for something.  lena’s particularly quiet during this time, turning it over in her head again and again, knowing exactly the weight that kara’s cousin carries for her, exactly how terrible this is for her, how it’s lena’s fault that kal-el’s not talking to kara
        • its a Bad Time, because then lena’s pulling away, putting distance where kara doesn’t want it out of guilt, but kara’s too upset to think anything but the worst and it culminates in what is actually their first fight (bc while they’ve had disagreements, disagreements have never ended with kara storming out in tears)
          • kara shows up at alex’s crying and alex’s first instinct is to murder lena luthor, her second is to hide the body, her third (and strongest) is to draw her sister into her arms and let her cry on her shoulder because everything’s just gone to shit and i dont know what to do alex, i dont know and alex’s heart is breaking and she stays with kara through the night and only leaves once her sister falls asleep, and only then to go to lena’s apartment and flashes her fbi forgery to be let up without question and then she’s banging on lena’s door shouting WHY IS KARA CRYING ON MY COUCH LUTHOR and lena answers the door looking wrecked, all red eyes and puffy face and its so obvious that she’s just as upset and alex, who will deny it vehemently if asked, has already developed a soft spot for her sister’s girlfriend, and it probably helps that lena’s first words to her are is kara alright?
          • so alex softens a little, enough to think rationally, to remember that lena is, by all evidence, absolutely whipped when it comes to kara and would never do anything to hurt her, so she asks what happened and lena looks like she doesn’t want to answer but this is alex, Super Intimidating DEO Agent And Also Sister To Supergirl/Kara Danvers and lena’s Lena Luthor, Billionaire and Survivor of Multiple Assassination Attempts, but she’s also incredibly sad and worried and scared that she’s ruined what was possibly the only good thing aside from her company so she tells alex everything and then alex is S E E T H I N G like what the fuck kent and she leaves lena, promising that talking to kara would be a good idea and calls kal-el and tells him he’s needed at the deo, to meet her in the training room
            • she greets him with a slap to the back of his head when he walks in like what the actual fuck kent, i get that you dont trust luthors, but you should trust kara of all people and his bullshit excuse gets lost somewhere in alex’s Big Sister yelling, like do you not understand how fucked up it is that you cut off the only person in the world that has any idea of what you go through just because you dont like who she’s dating and lena is not her brother, she’s not her mother or father either, she is her own person and i’m not sure if you remember, but your father in law built a death machine with the only purpose of using it to kill kara if he ever chose to, not sure if you remember that he tortured her aunt without need, not sure if you remember the hell he put kara through and you dont see her judging lois for that or cutting you off because of it and the mighty superman is reduced to a shaken ball of nerves by the end of it, suddenly realizing how shitty he was being
            • he gets to kara’s apartment just as lena does and then it’s as awkward and uncomfortable as it possibly could be and kara opens the door to find them locked in a staring match and then lena’s looking at kara and kara’s looking at lena and kal-el has to clear his throat to get them to even remember he’s there and even then just barely and he sort of mumbles out something about him being wrong, lena obviously cares about you and you care about her and im just going to butt my butt out now (at least that’s what kara garners from his stumbling attempts at an apology)
            • its never an easy topic, but its not like the kents and the danvers spend thanksgiving together or anything and it puts a strain on kara and kal-el’s relationship moving forward, something that trips lena up sometimes, makes her uncertain and worried and guilty and they struggle with that for quite some time, because lena knows that kara’s lost and doesn’t want her losing this, losing him too, just because of her; at the same time, kara’s reached a point of knowing that she’s damned either way, but even if its uncomfortable, she’s happy and lena’s happy and their friends are happy for them and that’s what matters