Trigger warnings for discussions of abuse and pedophilia below!
According to the NSPCC, child grooming is defined as “when someone builds an emotional connection with a child to gain their trust for the purposes of sexual abuse, sexual exploitation or trafficking.” (x) This differs from traditional cases of child abuse/molestation in that the abuser (and in most cases even the victim!) maintain they are participating in a consensual relationship. This is because the much older groomer preys upon their younger person’s inexperience to convince them what they’re doing is okay, and this manipulation is what leads to victims being unaware of their own abuse until it’s too late.
Child grooming can take place over the course of weeks, months, or even years, and can target anyone from children to teens. Child grooming occurs in stages, as explained here by forensic psychiatrist Dr. Michael Welner. The basic structure goes as such:
finding a child that both suit your needs and needs something in return
filling that child’s need/earning the child’s trust/making the child idolize you
isolating the child from their friends/family
sexualizing the “relationship”
blackmailing/maintaining control of the child (”they wont understand what we have” “if you love me you will only hang around me”)
If you will notice, the sexual nature of child grooming doesn’t come into play until after the victim has formed a relationship with their abuser. That, in my opinion, is the most despicable part of this tactic. Child groomers dont just want sex with children, they want complete control over someone much less experienced then they are. They want to groom and shape their victim into not just a sexual object, but also an unquestionably obedient “partner” that will put up with their abuses far into the future. Child groomers will tell their victims they are different from other people their age, more mature. They will isolate their victims from outside sources of support, making their victim rely solely upon their care and approval.
In short, they will attempt to own them.
Child grooming is an extremely harmful, yet tragically ignored form of abuse. This is especially prevalent in cases involving teenagers- a demographic so desperate to feel mature they will trip into relationships with people twice their age to prove their level of maturity. People tend to overlook these instances of child grooming because “if they’ve already gone through puberty it’s not pedophilia!!!1!!”, but what these people fail to realize is that even though most teens are sexually matured in the physical sense, their brains are still undergoing the transition between child and adulthood. Teens are probably the biggest targets of child grooming for this reason exactly: they look older than a child, but they can still be manipulated like one. Believe me, child groomers know this, and they use it to their advantage every day.
On a personal note, I met my abuser just weeks after my 18th birthday. Legally, I was an adult. Physically, I was matured. But when it came to relationships and intimacy I was completely inexperienced- which made it oh so easy for my (old enough to be my father *shudders*) groomer to swoop in and completely brainwash me into thinking our relationship was okay. This is why i’m angered when people argue that “age gap” relationships are fine as long as everyone is above the legal age of consent. News flash: everyone matures at their own pace, and relationships between teens and fully-grown adults will never be okay.
I repeat: whether you be an 8-year-old or an 18-year-old, any sort of non-platonic relationship with someone old enough to be your parent is harmful.
Even if it isn’t immediately sexual. Even if they tell you they love you. Even if they say they’ll “wait till you’re legal”. Romantic relationships between adolescents and adults are founded on an imbalance of power, plain and simple. So please, learn the signs of child grooming to help protect yourselves and the young people in your life.
(Sidebar: I know I’m a fandom blog and this post can easily be attributed to ships so I just want to clarify I am not talking about relationships between people who are like… 17 and 20. Teens and adolescents should be free to explore intimacy with other people of their same age/ experience levels. When I say “adult” I’m referring to anyone with a significant lead on years/ experience i.e a 45 year old and a 17 year old.)
we know that pidge was just starting middle school in the flashback at the end of episode 2 of season 4 because she says that she has to go through middle school without Matt there (because he will be on the kerberos mission)
most middle schoolers start at age 11 (turning 12 during the year) meaning that in the flashback pidge would have been about 12 years old. in the pilot we learned it takes months to get all the way out to kerberos so that would have taken some time.
in the pilot we are shown pidge a year after the failed kerberos mission which would have been a year and some months after the flashback in season 4 allowing the time for the kerberos mission to launch, fail, and have a 1 year anniversary of that failure. therefor pidge would have been about 14 at the time of the pilot.
we also know that pidge is 15 now which means that in canon from the time of the flashback to season 4 pidge would have aged 3 years and matt would have aged 3 years as well.
with the assumptions that the garrison is a high school program, said high school program wouldn’t send a student who hasn’t completed the program on a mission, and that most high schoolers start at age 14 (turning 15 during the year) and graduate when they are 18, then when matt went on the kerberos mission he would have been at least 18 years old.
this is also supported by the fact that keith, hunk and lance are all 17/18 year olds and were still part of the program and keith was the top student in the class but still wasn’t chosen to go on a mission. none of them were. they were all still being trained in the pilot which leads to the idea that the garrison wouldn’t send people to space until they completed the program/graduated. so again matt would have been at LEAST 18.
if he was at least 18 when he went on the mission and 3 years have passed in canon since the flashback scene, that would mean that in season 4 matt would be at least 21 years old.
I’ve been thinking about TF monsters lately, but more specifically TF mindflayers
Consider: a mech that consumes another bot’s mind/consciousness through pnp/hardline connection. Probably super painful, but they can manipulate the connection to put them into a sort of haze as they slowly erase/absorb the mech’s memories and everything that makes them who they are.
They’d probably be able to hide out in all sort of fields too. A mnemosurgeon that just eats the parts of a mech’s personality that they want gone. Or a medic putting the patients that can’t be saved out of their suffering. Some of them go into Ops where their victims are members of another faction and won’t be missed.
They’d be terrifying because there’s be no real way to tell them apart from other mechs unless you looked at coding and then it’d already be too late because they’d be in your systems.
They’d probably have real specialized cords/wires too, in order to dig into a processor more easily. Maybe their faces could even transform apart? into something decidedly Not Normal.
When they’re done all that’s left is a shell, still alive, but unable to function for long without a processor to guide it.
ive been meaning to post this for like ages now lmao,, this is my submission for @gemsonaresources fuse-a-polooza! (EDIT: im dumb an forgot to tag them w hoops) its a fusion of my spinel (the purple one) and @arthurxxvi ‘s labradorite, which make spectrolite!! i imagine theyre kinda solemn an a lil forgetful, but nice none the less (probs draining to be fused for long? yea)
also also id love for you to explain the whole dimitri ACTUALLY being (a?) God thing bc its so...fascinating? i just really like it? what exactly are the ramifications (i dont even know if thats the right word) of this? how did this happen? was he always? what can he DO??? ty ty also bc ive been asking like a million questions
HAHAHAH OH MAN THIS IS A LONG AND WILD RIDE BUCKLE UP KIDS
ok i’m gonna skim over a buuunch of stuff in his early backstory for the sake of keeping this as short as i can but what you gotta know is:
(1) he was born post-world war three, centuries after our present day, meaning technology in his era was vastly superior to ours now. (2) nearly the entire world was dominated by a “benevolent” organisation called EDEN, which allegedly had the intention of rebuilding the world from its ashes and ushering in a new age of peace and progress. (3) obviously EDEN wasn’t telling the public everything and they were up to some shady shit under the facade.
essentially after a Shitload of Trauma™ that turned him into the asshole he is today Dimitri decided he was gonna take EDEN’s tech for himself and become immortal. a god, if you will. (and sidenote: this is actually how and why he meets Xero!!!)
oof sorry for two personal posts one after the other but i had another thought just now that ive been meaning to talk about
ive been thinkin??? of changing my url??? cause its like… i like it its kinda my brand now but at the same time i just… it doesnt fit anymore. not the shit that im posting and i feel like i need something new
i just thought of this cause i was like is the url the-raven-king taken and it was but there was fuckin nothing on the blog and i got super pissed cause i could have that but that mother fucker has it
idk!!! lemme know what you think i think i should look for something to change it to
Imangine something bad or sad happening to Ross and he can't handle it and runs out of the room. Barry goes after him, and after a long search, he finds the angel huddled in a corner. He kneels down and guides Ross's face to look at him, jumping a little to see its in its one eye mode. Barry asks what he's doing, and Ross is hesitant, but finally says "I-I c-can't cry when I o-only have one eye..." Barry pulls him in to a large bear hug, and after a while, feels tears on his shirt...
OKAY I sooooo want this to be a reaction to the whole ‘im gonna outlive everyone of you’ type of scenario that moss and I made up ahh WARNING THIS IS A LONG FUCKIN POST OKAY I GOT CARRIED AWAY ITS LIKE A GODDAMN SHORT STORY AT THIS POINT AAAAAAAAAA
Like, he goes to find him and when he does hes curled up on the couch in the grump room, his wings almost completely engulfing him. The room is dark save for the tv giving off a faint bluish glow, probably from Arin or Danny leaving the game on for too long. He goes around and sits down across from Ross, waiting for him to open up about whatevers been bothering him if he decides to start talking. Its a long, heavy silence before Ross starts to speak up; he peeks out from behind his crossed arms, curling his feathers back a little so he sounds a bit more clearer.
He tries to explain these complicated feelings and circumstances; how hes been alive for soooo long and hes seen so many humans living their lives, how everyone hes met has died but its always been a sort of calming farewell and he just moves on with life. In comparison to his lifetime, they take up what feels like only minutes of his life and usually the people who die are replaced relatively easily. Barry scoffs and Ross automatically tries to take that back: “Its not that they werent important to me! its just, getting caught up with the realization that theyre gone is too much effort, its easier to just make more happy memories instead of dwelling on stuff like that…”
Barry kinda just stares at the TV for awhile before talking. “Then why are you so beat up over this?” Ross looks at him weirdly and Barry feels like he has to elaborate. “Like, this has happened to you tons of times right, friends dying I mean, and everytime it happens you give yourself a healthy amount of time to mourn and move on with you life.” He turns to look at Ross and hes got this broken look on his face like hes about to start crying at any given moment and Barry almost feels guilty for talking, but hes not finished yet: hes genuinely confused and he wants an answer. “I dont understand… if this is routine for you, why are you breaking down now? Im not trying to sound spiteful im just curious; what makes this generation of friends so much more different than the others? You can easily make new ones right after us, we arent that special” and Barry laughs bc its true and hes just trying to lighten up the tension a little. But without warning Ross whips his wings behind him and shouts:
“No! Thats the problem you guys ARE special to me!! You guys mean EVERYTHING TO ME and Ive never felt so helpless before. I care about all of you so much and its frightening how much ive grown attached..i-ive always had dreams about burying my friends decades before they actually die but its always been reassuring like im gonna remember these people and im gonna be the one to make sure they rest easy but now ive been having those dreams with you guys! And everytime i have them, im crying in hysterics and i feel so fucking hopeless and uneasy in these…nightmares and I dont know what to do..” Ross’ face is flushed and Barry can tell hes desperately trying to hold back tears:
“I-I dont know what im gonna do with myself when you guys pass… you guys are so important to me i-ive never had this issue before and I t-talked to brian about this and hes having the same problem!! I DONT UNDERSTAND i dont know what to do and I have no one to talk to for advice and the more I think about it the more stressed I become a-and I know im just rambling at this point but Im so scared and I have these feelings and im just so unclear about what they are: oh god if I lose you guys, if I lose YOU i-im…im really scared Barry…” and before he starts crying he puts his face in his hands and starts breathing heavily, wings shaking feverishly. Barry wants so bad to just give him a solid answer, to tell him that he’ll be fine and he’ll get over them eventually dont worry! But Ross is in the middle of a breakdown and hes got all these feelings bubbling to the surface now and all he can do just kinda sit there awkwardly..
“Holy shit, Ross dont cry ahh oh no…fuck…“ He gently tries to pry open his hands only to be taken aback by Ross staring at him with his one eyed form. “What the fuck! You cant just throw that at me, shit! W-why are you like that??” When Ross talks, its a weird type of mix between his own voice and autotune: its sounds like.. hes thinking of Ross talking to him instead of actually hearing him and it throws Barry for a loop: “When im like this… I cant cry… that way I wont worry you too much…” and Barry just stares bc the dude is in the middle of a crisis and the first thing he does is try his best to make him a bit more comfortable and at this point hes like, i fucked up somehow and ive got to make this right… making sure this is the right thing to do, he transforms into his bear form, something that Ross rarely gets to witness and slowly opens his arms into an inviting hug: “Im gonna do that thing Arin does whenever were upset… is it okay for me to do that for you?” and when Ross meekly nods his head, Barry carefully scoops him up in a hug, gently petting his head.
He kinda feels like this isnt working as well as it should until he can feel a sort of dampness on his shirt and when he realizes its Ross crying, he clings a little harder and starts rocking him a little trying to encourage him to let it out “Keeping it all in never works okay? At least thats what Arin always says…You gotta try to tell us when shit like this is eating you alive and keeping you up at night…” He pulls back a little so that he can look Ross in the eye. Hes staring up at him wide eyes, his face red with exhaustion and cheeks damp with tears. “Ross, you have to promise me that you come talk to me if you feel like this again okay? Nobody wins if you keep it all inside okay… you gotta promise me” Ross is still staring doe-eyed at him before slowly nodding his head… Barry smiles and slowly gets up, leaving Ross on the couch. “Stay here, ill be back. I just need to get you some water and blankets: well just camp out on the couch for tonight how does that sound?” Ross looks up at him and nods, not trusting himself enough to speak and Barry, satisfied with the answer goes down the hall.
I…HAVE NO EXCUSE… I RAMBLED ON FOR FAR TOO LONG this was in my head for soooooo long and once I saw the ask, I had to take the opportunity to write a goddamn novel haha I WANTED TO ALSO CLARIFY that Ross talks telepathically when he does that weird one eye thing… ive been meaning to say something about that for ages so i just decided to add that in… IM SORRY FOR THE LONG POST AAAA
You go out to get your mail in the morning. Your neighbor is there. You turn to smile and wave. He does the same with lifeless eyes and a too-wide smile. The package he is carrying is dripping. His driveway is littered with dark red splotches. You remind yourself to invite him to your barbecue next week.
You go out to get your mail the next morning. A different neighbor is there. You turn to smile and wave. She hastily turns away and rushes back into her house. Her eyes still have color. That will change soon. You remind yourself to invite her to your barbecue next week.
Your friend taps your shoulder in the school hallways to get your attention. You turn to them. They are wearing a Life is Good t-shirt. The person next to them is wearing one too. Everyone in the hallway has one on. You look down. You are wearing one. That is not the shirt you put on this morning.
You decide to go to your school in the middle of the night to sit in the empty parking lot. When you arrive, you find it is not empty at all. All the teachers’ cars remain in their same positions. A thick layer of dust covers them. You look up at a lighted window. There is your freshman math teacher pointing to a powerpoint. She is giving a lecture to an empty classroom. Her skin is gaunt and pale, and the gray under her eyes seems to stretch for miles.
There is no one on your bus to school anymore. Come to think of it, there is no one in the hallways anymore either. When you walk into your classroom, it is always full.
Your friend invites you over to their house. They live in a cul-de-sac. You hear children screaming from outside. Your friend laughs. “Are they having fun or being murdered?” You laugh too. When you look outside the window two minutes later, there are no children. In their stead, there is a rapidly disappearing pool of dark liquid. You can still hear the screaming. You and your friend laugh.
It is time to find a job, but all your applications are returned with a “sorry, but the position has been filled.” Every employee in every store looks the same. Every position has been filled.
Outside, a dog barks. Your dog begins to bark back. You don’t have a dog.
The bike trail is almost entirely devoid of people when you decide to go walking. A mile in, you see a girl lying down on a bench. A mile later, the same girl is lying down. She is there every mile. Her eyes track you as you walk.
Everyone talks about leaving this shit hole of a town. Your teachers talk about growing up here. Your friends’ parents talk about their old teachers at your high school. Twenty years have passed. You are still here. You never left. You remember going to college at the same time you remember working at the local grocery store.
Your family has decided to rent out the basement floor to someone passing through town. You have never seen them. But sometimes at night you hear strange noises coming from downstairs. This is standard enough for renters.
There is a deer in your backyard. You pull out your phone to take a picture. It turns its head and smiles. From the forest behind it emerge more smiling deer with black vacant eyes. You take a picture.
You walk to the library with your friend after school one day. You talk about the new releases you are excited for. You are finally getting the best-sellers of 2013. When you turn back to look at her, she is no longer there. You ask the person walking behind you if he has seen where she’s gone. “Who?” he asks with an innocent smile. You frown. That’s the third one this week.
In the summer nights, you can hear the football team practicing. It is two a.m. You live ten miles from the high school. Their grunts and shouts cannot be shut out.
The trees are loud at night. You hear the person who lives across the street yell at them to shut up. Two days later, there is a “for sale” sign on his lawn.
There is only one shopping complex in your town. All the teens gather in the local McDonald’s. They never leave. You go inside one day, and it smells like rotting meat. You leave and never go back.
There is a street called No Way. No one goes down it. One time, you watched a friend try. It swallowed him whole.
Someone you know tells you they are going to the city. They say this for three weeks until one day they’re just gone. You read their obituary in the paper the next day over breakfast and shed a tear.
There is a diner that everyone eats breakfast at. The doorbell rings when you enter. All the diners turn their heads and smile at you and greet you by name. You’ve never been to this diner before.
It is tradition to play a friendly neighborhood game of Manhunt on the Fourth of July. At least five people don’t make it through the night every year. You run. They are gaining on you.
There is only one graveyard and infinite ways to get there. On days where the sky is gray and stormy, it doesn’t matter which way you go, you will always end up at its wrought iron gates.
“It’s a beautiful day,” the cashier at the grocery store says to you. It’s always a beautiful day. Outside the pavement cracks and building crumble and people cry for mercy. “It sure is,” you agree.
The trees at the edge of your property tower over you. They are massive and ancient and far wiser than anyone you know. As you stare up at them, you are filled with a sense of simultaneous longing and dread.
Everyone you pass in the streets says hello to you. It is an endless stream of hellos. They wave and smile with glassy eyes that scream help, h e l p. You say hello back. It’s the polite thing to do.
At the high school pep rally, the cheerleaders begin singing a song you have never heard. Around you, all the people sing along. You begin to sing along too. You do not know the words. You do not like the tune. You continue singing.
You have lived in the same house your whole life. You know every creak and nook and cranny. You moved here from across town only last month. But there in your new bedroom is that scratch in the wall you made when you were eight.
Someone new has made their way into your community. You can tell because your limbs are moving of their own volition, hands pulling a container of your signature potato salad from the fridge. Your fridge is full of these containers. They are the only things in there. Like a rusty wind-up doll, your legs jerkily carry you down the street to the new neighbor’s house. Your mouth stretches into an unnatural smile. On the way, you make eye contact with another member of the welcoming party. There is a tear in her eye that cannot fall and she tries to speak through her teeth at you. You turn away. They cannot see you consorting with one of them.
The town committee holds a meeting every six months. This is the first one you have been to in years. The man who calls order to the room is the same one who brought you a casserole the first day you moved in. The years that have passed seem to have had no effect on him. The elderly couple next you mention how he’s aged a little since they were children.
The person who plays her is 24 so I’m guessing she could be around 18 in the show soon as Joes 25
yeah ive been thinking about it and based on that flashback of them in the playroom Eleven looks about 4 and Kali looks 8, which would mean if El is like 13/14 in season two Kali is 17/18 which is about Steves age so yeah. its age appropriate. which means i totally ship it.
imagine steve - king of the redemption arc - helping her to see revenge isnt the right path for her. MAKE IT HAPPEN DUFFER BROTHERS
i’ve also been filling lots of these $8 commissions already (here’s the sample tag from other satisfied customers!!) - but i’m trying to start a webstore where i sell acrylic phone charms, key chains, digital art prints, buttons, etc. and that means i need start up money! so i thought i would wip up a more official post, modeled by my own ocs.<3
NOTE: the $8 price tag is for Wardens (of all races, genders, and classes) and Hawkes (in finery, “male” or “female”). alternate outfits or other ocs (dragon age related or otherwise!) have a totally different price listing based on complexity that you’ll have to work out with me personally, so send me an ask if you’re interested on a more personalized commission!!
i’m used to drawing characters with a wide variety of facial features, gender expressions, and racial backgrounds! don’t worry if your character is unique - I LOVE unique! :^D
i work REALLY quickly (since these take less than an hour each to draw) and i’m not employed during the summer months, so you can expect your commission back promptly!!! :^)
i DO require payment in advance. i’ve been fucked over more than once and i’m only asking for $8!! (if youre really that worried i’ll dump you, i’ll send you a preliminary sketch, but i will require payment before i publish the final product)
email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
thank you to everyone who’s commissioned me already!! its a HUGE help!!! <3 with enough luck, i’ll have my store opened in no time!
by the way, i’m working on the Inquisitor armors (mage, rogue, and warrior), so soon you’ll be able to dream over your next hero!!! i’m already excited. :^)
god fun lore but actual gameplay was really bad and hard
not surprising tbh… i mean the change from fallen london which is just like.. a browser text game to an Actual Game is hard. the lore and writing for fl is really good and i love it, but doing an actual game… different
alright, listen. ive been around tumblr for a long time. ive had blogs on this website for a solid 4 years, and you know what? i have no idea where momblr went. my entire dashboard used to be moms. i mean like, vegan etsy moms. moms who practically inhale avocados and smell like wine 24/7. i was 12 years old and never posted my age on my blog, and they accepted me. they thought i was part of their mom group. we grew apart, somehow, but im not sure when. i just hope theyre doing ok.