its not even good but i deleted the better ones because i was mad

A LIST OF SWAN QUEEN FAN FICTION

B/C I KNOW Y’ALL ARE TIRED OF LOOKING FOR SWANQUEEN FANFIC RECS ON TUMBLR SO HERES THE GOOD SHIT.

  • all of these are in english
  • if you have any recommendations or additions, please let me know!
  • some fanfictions that i originally planned to include on this list were deleted by their authors :( 


CLASSICS (favorites)

The Art Of Being Extraordinary - if you haven’t read this already, wyd? The ending will destroy you - be prepared to cry. 

Letters From War - another extremely well known fic among swen. a heart-wrenching and beautifully written AU fic. even if AUs aren’t your thing, seriously, give this one a try.

Emma is a soldier on reserve in Fort Benning. Regina is the Mayor of Storybrooke. Through a pen pal program designed to ease the ache of homesick soldiers, Emma and Regina begin sending letters to one another as their relationship grows from cordial acquaintance to something neither woman would have expected - until the letters stop coming.

A Trail Of Destruction - DEFINITELY a classic imo. this is one of my favorite fanfictions of all time.

A hostage situation in City Hall leaves behind a battered, broken sheriff, and a mayor wracked with guilt. Trigger warnings for violence and gun threats and general angst. Slow-burn swan queen.

Miles To Go - AU; emma and regina meet at a party and the rest is history. this ones pretty long (80 chapters), but so worth the read! angsty & lots of ‘sexy times’ 

Everyone has their own story, this one is theirs and it paints the picture of a love story that spans over two decades, with all the ups and downs and everything else in between. SwanQueen AU
 

Of Love and Loathing - a lot of angry sex in the beginning, which eventually turns into lovey sex. another well known and well written fic - this author is one of my favorites. *reaaallyyy hot smut 

“I have been sleeping with someone,” Regina began tentatively, an acute awareness that once she said the words out loud that the madness behind her highly unorthodox situation became all the more real, “whom I absolutely loathe.” •Emma/Regina•

Meet me Halfway - one of the first swan queen fan fictions i ever read! still a classic to this day. AU

Emma Swan works hard every night as a bartender, struggling to raise her son and save up enough to own her own bar. Regina Mills is an upper class New York photographer who wouldn’t normally spare a second glance at people below her. When their paths cross, their lives adapt to each other, but how much are they willing to change?

Love Undefined - in the process of re-reading this one because of how much i love it. angsty as hell but such a beautiful story.

It’s been eight years since the last time Regina and Emma saw each other, eight years since Emma lost part of her happiness, her family, and everything fell apart. But she hasn’t forgotten those three years in New York, or any of what Regina had brought into her life. A late night phone call to Regina takes Emma back eleven years to when they met, saved each other from loneliness, and Emma started learning what it meant to live. She relives the moments that had changed her life for the better, and even the ones that had hurt.

Teacher’s Pet - KNOWN AS THE ONE TEACHER/STUDENT FANFIC THAT EVERYONE HAS READ. 

Emma Swan is starting her senior year. Her friends tell her about the Creative Writing teacher that she has on her schedule and how no one had passed her class with an A, not even her bookworm friend, Belle. What will she do? And who exactly is this ‘bitchy Evil Queen’ as they claim her to be? SwanQueen. Student/Teacher. M for language and future chapters.

Lost in Translation - i wasn’t sure about this before reading it but i LOVED it. the description pretty much sums it up.

AU. Regina is deaf. Emma is the only one who refuses to give her pity. In response, Regina is thrilled by this new challenge and the stand-offs commence, but over time she finds out there is more to the blonde woman than just a target to throw a stinging quip and pointed glare at.

Send Up a Signal - emma and regina are actresses and their fans ship them with each other. ;)

Emma Swan is catapulted into stardom, the newest lead actress on a sanitized show featuring modern fairytales. Regina Mills is a long-undermined star with a chip on her shoulder and a thousand reasons why she’s invested. Naturally, they loathe each other on sight.Their characters’ fanbases, however, have other ideas.

Reset - SO. GOOD. 95 chapters. if you’re looking for long fanfics, this is for you. 

Following the breaking of the curse everyone in Storybrooke is finding their happy ending, with one exception. Resigning herself to having lost Henry’s love and respect forever, Regina decides there is only one path available to her.

Take Me Home Tonight - AU!! lots of smut :) this is a newer one that i’ve seen around twitter and tumblr and i really enjoyed it! this one’s pretty short (14 chapters)

AU: Nineteen year old Emma Swan is a senior at the exclusive all girls boarding school, Foxhaven Academy. When her friends find out she’s a virgin they send her to the city to find a guy to take her v-card. But Emma is more interested in a sexy older woman she meets in a bar. A SwanQueen story.

The Staircase - non-consensual sex in the first chapter, so please be aware of that; its not for eveyone. this story is very dark but has a happy ending i promise!

Regina could still smell her cologne and feel the cheap pleather pressing into her back. The brunette sucked in a breath. She was still lying on the floor at the staircase’s base and she stared back up at it. Everything was different now. Changed. She felt broken by what had just happened, appalled and enraged, dirty. WARNING: NC17 for non-consensual sex. Dark. (But gets lighter.)

the trouble with emma - very very well known within the swan queen community. i’ll be honest, i never really got into the story but i can acknowledge that it is the most well-written fanfiction i have read to date. the author is truly talented. (the first in a series of fanfics)

Post ep 4x23, Emma becomes the Dark One and learns nothing is quite as it seems or as simple as black versus white. When Regina removes the curse no one in Storybrooke is prepared for the far reaching fallout which leaves none of their lives unaltered or untouched, least of all Regina’s.

SMUT 

shadow haven  - the one smut fic everyone has read.

Emma Swan is a PR agent who is sent on a holiday by her boss. Regina Mills is the owner of a private island named Shadow Haven. There is more to Regina than initially meets the eye. This story dips heavily into the BDSM subculture. Swan Queen romance / BDSM story.

the wicked stepmother - the one kinky fic everyone has read- or attempted to. i couldn’t get through the whole thing but the first few chapters,,, holy hell.

When the Evil Queen catches baby Emma along with Snow White, she decides on a new revenge. In Storybrooke, Snow White will be allowed to raise her daughter… but on her eighteenth birthday, Regina will come for her. Emma might just enjoy that.

in control  - Regina had never been in the habit of relinquishing control, but when it came to Emma Swan, she was starting to find out that giving in had its benefits. - Established Swan Queen - One Shot. Rated M for language and content.

the collar - It will carry strong mature themes as well as a Mistress/Slave relationship but it is also a lot more than that. However, as a warning this story will celebrate the shades of grey of our favourite couple as they find their way to each other and will deal with darker elements of their characters. Emma’s history differs a little from canon but will be covered by the story but there is no Henry and she is an adult in this fiction.

a little taste  - author of A Fine Line and Letters from War. 

Emma has been desperate to know what it’s like to kiss the smirk off of Regina Mills, but when she finally gets the chance, it doesn’t seem to be enough.

tempest - A storm ushers in an expected opportunity for Regina to finally rid herself of Emma Swan. She will posses the sheriff’s heart and then crush it. But what happens when nothing goes as planned? Rated M for language and Swan Queen sexytimes.

come on be nice - Regina has decided that the quickest way to get rid of Emma Swan is to scare off the commitment phobic woman with a come-on. This, as with many of Regina’s plans, does not go as, well, planned. Rated M for Swan Queen sex.

black lace - Emma and Henry find a way around the 'no visiting’ rule involving binoculars and the walkie talkie. Emma’s attention is fully on her son, she truly doesn’t intend to watch Regina at all. At least until the mayor begins undressing in front of her window..

dirty words - Regina is plagued by thoughts of a certain blonde. Deciding she is in need of cathartic release, she writes a quick narrative in hopes of cleansing her system. However, by a happy accident, the story falls into the wrong hands. What will Emma do with this new and intriguing insight into the mayor’s mind?

damn you, miss swan  Emma visits the mayor one night with a bottle of wine to cheer her up. Anger issues and smeared lippy ensues. WARNING: Includes a non-explicit passing reference to rape. This is my first story. A/N Jan 2015: Way back when I wrote this, no one knew anyone’s back stories, so I just made up stuff. Don’t be upset for canon divergence if you read it now. It wasn’t canon then.

mirror tricks The Evil Queen has made her way to Storybrooke, but she only seems to be interested in one thing: Emma. When Regina realises this, her jealousy starts to get the better of her.

my enemy’s enemy After her mother’s death, Regina finds a terrible surprise hidden among the witch’s belongings. Unfortunately, the only one able to cure her from the ailment is Emma…if she agrees. Strong language and mature themes. First stab at SwanQueen :)

ANGST

to remember her happy ending - “She doesn’t even remember her family! How am I going to explain this to her when she hates me!” She was falling apart now. The way the women in the other room had just looked at her, with such disdain. That wasn’t her wife. That was the Mayor, the Evil Queen maybe…but not her wife.

for endings are where we begin Regina Mills is your average working mom - she spends long hours at her bakery, loves her son Henry with all that she is, and can touch dead things and bring them back to life.Emma Swan is an orphan, an ex-convict, and a bail bondsperson residing in Massachusetts. She is also currently dead.This is the story of how they meet.

the loudest silence - New to Chicago Emma, a professional cellist, is shocked to find that a beautiful deaf woman is her new president of the board. As their friendship grows Emma begins to wonder, what does it look like when a world of sound and a world of silence meet somewhere in the middle? SwanQueen AU

broken 16 year Emma Swan is a preachers daughter on a tight leash, what happens when Regina Mills returns to town, dark, mysterious and dangerous? Will her father’s expectations take over or will Emma follow her heart? Is Regina legit or is Emma cute little pawn? Will Emma be able to love Regina for who she is or will her dark past ruin it ALL! SwanQueen G!P Some BDSM

bring her home Cora’s dead. Henry lives with the Charmings. Regina continues spiraling through grief and loss and hatred. Then Emma suddenly falls unconscious and Henry shows up at Regina’s door because he needs her help to bring Emma back. Reluctantly, Regina embarks on a wild swan chase through Emma’s mind, a whirlwind of ‘roads‐less‐traveled’ and ‘what‐ifs’ and ‘might‐have‐beens’, in order to bring her home.

if the blazer fits Emma decides to dress up like Regina for a Halloween party at The Rabbit Hole, a seemingly innocent decision that surprisingly leads to a relationship. The romance is openly feared by some and secretly despised by an unlikely source, who plots to end it.

a fine line Upon Regina’s banishment, the small town of Storybrooke becomes protected once again by an enchantment that prevents anyone from leaving or entering Storybrooke. Emma and Regina find themselves on the edge of the town, wishing for a way to the other side.

a pale imitation Regina is furious with Emma after she brings back Marian, but since she can’t take it out on her, Regina creates a mindless clone of Emma to hit instead. The clone doesn’t stay mindless for long though, developing an obsession with Regina. Written for summer 2014 Swan Queen Big Bang. (TW for sexual assault/rape and graphic depictions of violence)

FLUFF

one fine mess - Regina’s gut twisted with an agonizing pull and, for just a moment, she thought she might need to take up the same position as the woman crouched before her. “You’re pregnant?” she whispered grimly. Emma’s only response was to turn and retch into the toilet again. — Swan Queen, magic!pregnancy

coffee at midnight - (so good) Slow burn AU that starts with two women from different parts of the USA meeting on Twitter. Emma is an insomniac loner who is a Personal Trainer. Regina is a writer with a sleepless baby. Their lack of sleep and love for coffee soon brings them together and after that they find it hard to part. This is a fic where coffee is taking to mythical levels, despite it’s bad effect on people with insomnia and people with babies - showing that sometimes what you need and want isn’t always the thing that is wholesome and harmless. But also that denying yourself it will only lead to misery, something which Regina has to apply to other parts of her life.

all the single ladies With the library in desperate need of renovation, Storybrooke prepares for a fundraising dinner and bachelorette auction. What mischief and romance can be found as a result? SwanQueen with some RedBeauty Rating has been raised to M - now including adult content.


TEACHER+STUDENT / EMPLOYEE+BOSS

teacher’s pet - see above (classics)

take me home tonight - see above (classics)

step into my office, baby  - This is what you get for doing the nice thing, Emma thinks. You do that whole Pay It Forward bullshit - you buy a lady some coffee and you pretend like it isn’t totally motivated by how she looks in a pencil skirt - and she goes and insults your business card and turns out to be your company’s new Executive Director. Real fucking cute.From now on, she is drinking tea.or, the one where they’re in an office.

teaching miss mills  - Swan Queen Teacher AU: Emma is a gym teacher, who moves to Storybrooke Academy after becoming disenchanted with her job back in Boston. Regina Mills is the Head of English who Emma somehow seems to keep having run-ins with, despite the best of intentions. Along the way, Emma adjusts to small-town life, gets her teaching mojo back and grows closer to Regina. NOW COMPLETE

troubled teachers - COMPLETE! SwanQueen AU. Geography teacher Emma Swan starts a new life far from her troubled past and meets history teacher Regina Mills. But all is not as it seems when it comes to the composed, intelligent, and beautiful brunette. Family struggles and difficult relationships lead to a friendship and soon something more blossoms. Rated M for Ch 7, 18, 22, 24, 28, 29, 31, 35 and 38

not a virgin anymore When college student Emma Swan wakes up one morning with no memory of what happened the night before she’s very surprised she finds herself in professor Mills’s bed. 

is that so, miss swan? - College student, Emma Swan, is confronted by her favorite professor and secret heart-throb, Dr. Regina Mills. What happens when Emma is forced to reveal her secrets? We shall see. AU. Slightly OOC at times. No magic. SwanQueen. Rated M for serious language and eventual sexy times between our two favorite ladies.

butterfly effect - in her final year of college, Emma finds she has more to account for than the extra credits she needs in order to graduate. Only… she doesn’t expect it to come in the form of her newest instructor, Professor Regina Mills. Complete. AU Swan Queen

a sophisticated seduction Emma’s a college student, working as an intern at the Dazzle Magazine for a powerful woman she has never had the good fortune of meeting. But everything in her life is about to change when they finally meet. Especially when one falls so deeply in love with the other and the insecurities from a broken marriage comes to light. (Not Based on The Devil Wears Prada)

some other faves

down east decisions - Massachusetts State Police Capt. Emma Swan leaves her red-hot career to become the police chief of sleepy Storybrooke, Maine. She’s hoping for a less-complicated, less-dangerous life, a desire that is dashed on both counts. AU. No magic. Crime drama and romance. Swan Queen is endgame.

that drunken night - Emma’s wasted and accidentally calls Regina instead of her mom. And Regina isn’t as loathe to talk to the blonde as she usually pretends. Did things change between them so radically while they were in Neverland? (No copyright infringement intended.)

chasing henry - SQ. Tired of the tricks and lies of both of his mothers, Henry follows the dwarves, Red and Granny when they use Tiny’s magic beans to return themselves to their old land. Emma and Regina both chase after him, and they reluctantly travel together through the Enchanted Forest in order to find him and bring him back home safely.

so does this make us both the other woman? - Set after 3b in a peaceful Storybrooke where Regina is with Robin and Emma’s fallen into a relationship with Hook. Shame about all that subtext that’s rapidly threatening to become text.

{Special} College!AU Jaehyun
  • major: visual arts / concentration: sculpture 
  • minor: n/a
  • sports: the star player and point guard for the uni’s basketball team 
  • clubs: wanted to join the art club but it conflicted with practice so his coach said he should drop it 
  • jaehyun is what you could call a campus celebrity, as in everyone always greets him and not only students ,,,,,,,but teachers too
  • all the faculty are always like jaehyun!!! you won us another trophy!!!! and jaehyun is like “well the whole te-” and they’re like cANT WaIT foR YOU TO TAKE US TO NATIONALS
  • and he’s just,,,,very humble about it because he doesn’t really know what to do with all the attention,,,,,and his friends (we are all looking at johnny) don’t let him live it down
  • and it’s /true/ his basketball scholarship is paying his full tuition and he loves the sport,,,,,,,,so he plays and practices with everything he’s got
  • but also,,,,,he’s got interests and hobbies 
  • and everyone on the team thinks he chose his “art major” because it’s “easy” and wont cut into practice 
  • because they’re all like jaehyun,,,,,you’re gonna get scouted and go pro right??????
  • but the reality is jaehyun,,,,,,jaehyun likes art. he likes looking at it, learning about it,,,,,,,,and making it 
  • yuta once pointed out that jaehyun’s hands are perfect for playing basketball they’re strong and big and can hold the ball really well while,,,,,,,ahem taeyong here with his bony little - jkjk
  • but jaehyun had agreed,,,,,his hands are nice,,,,,but they’re strong not only for basketball but because he likes to sculpt
  • just being in the studio,,,working with clay,,,,it calms him down but it also takes a lot of physicality that people overlook
  • and out of everyone it feels like only some of his friends get that his future isn’t just basketball basketball basketball,,,,,,
  • like mark and ten think it’s really cool and taeil always seems to cut the conversation when doyoung and johnny go off on tangents about how ~cool~ pro basketball jaehyun will be
  • but,,,,,,,,jaehyun knows he has responsibilities to the team,,,the school,,,,,and to keeping his scholarship 
  • also lets all take a moment to enjoy jaehyun in the basketball uniform,,,,sweaty,,,,towel around his neck
  • or even better,,,,,jaehyun after practice in a tank top,,,,,sweat pants,,,,,wet hair from the showers
  • ok ahem moving on
  • johnny does this thing where he yells JEFFREY at every game and jaehyun would flip him off if he wasnt such a sweet person LOL
  • keeps all the banners people make for him because he doesnt have the heart to throw them away or not accept them
  • and his roommate mark is like bro,,,,,,,,bro our closet is overflowing,,,brO
  • half the people in his art classes think he’s a joke and try to be high and mighty about how he’s just a jock,,,,,,,,,,but the other half are just heart eyes because wOW look at his muscles 
  • does the thing where he carries everything during studio or shop classes like literally carried about fifteen peoples projects,,,,then held the door open for people getting their huge portfolios or canvases through the door,,,,,got the wood for one person,,,,the clay blocks for another
  • he really cannot say no,,,,,,,its a problem jfldsgifdjlkfs
  • he comes back from class completely SPENT and mark is like,,,,,,,i didn’t know art involved so much,,,,,heavy lifting 
  • jaehyun with his face in the pillow: you dont even know mark,,,,,,you dont even know
  • wakes up super early to go running and do push ups on the field and everyone thinks he’s being super intense listening to some wild edm music getting pumped up but actually he’s listening to a podcast on alien abduction or something because hes always bringing it up like 
  • catch him sitting in sculpture II talking to his seatmate about the existence of extraterrestrial beings
  • and the person is just like ???????? and jaehyun is like “im telling you,,,,,they exist!!!!”
  • and then after he’s sitting next to ten and johnny telling them what happened and how his seatmate looked kinda scared and ten is like oh sweetheart,,,,,,,,,,,,,you probably gave the kid a heartattack
  • johnny just laughs his ass off so much he chokes on his rice 
  • he’s a silly boy,,,who is actually much more than his athleticism and he secretly wishes more people,,,,,,,would just accept him as a normal college student and not the ‘star player of the basketball team’
  • like he wants to join clubs!! meet people!! talk to teachers about upcoming exhibits,,,go to museums,,,,go on,,,,,,,,,,,,,,dates
  • but he also feels like he can’t let people down not when even winwin is asking him to sign his notebook because wow jaehyun is on a real winning roll for the team!!!!
  • sometimes when he gets super tired from practice and class he’ll start sleep talking to himself in english and he’ll do it like right in the library where he fell asleep on his books
  • doyoung even took a video of it and it became a meme on campus,,,,,,jaehyun was not happy and chased doyoung around the campus like ten times till taeil just took doyoungs phone and deleted it
  • doyoung: how did you get my password???
  • taeil: i knew your password was ilovetaeyong don’t play yourself
  • anYWAY  
  • you know jaehyun because he’s in your sculpting studio class and unlike most of the people there you don’t care that he’s a jock but you also don’t care about his good looks
  • mostly because,,,,,,,you care about your sculpture LOL not some dude in class who seems to be involved in so much gossip
  • the one thing you do care about and know,,,,,is that he’s got talent. you’ve been seeing him diligently work on this very pretty marble replica of strazza’s the veiled virgin
  • and it’s hard to make marble look like cloth,,,,,,but somehow he’s been pulling it off nicely
  • and whenever he isn’t in the studio,,,you couldn’t help yourself but go and take a closer work because really,,,,,,,,,did the basketball stare really do this>??
  • and one afternoon you happen to be working on your own piece while jaehyun is around and you know 
  • you exchange the pleasantry nods  and whatnot,,,but for the most part it’s quiet aside from the noise of your tools which is completely fine with you
  • until,,,,,,,,suddenly it’s anything but quiet
  • because the door has busted open and a couple of jaehyun’s rowdy teammates have strolled inside,,,,,,
  • and they’re like “coach said practice schedule is fucked up and we gotta be in the gym in ten minutes, let’s go jung”
  • and jaehyun is like ill be there but i need time to clean up-
  • “it’s just your art stuff, do it later and if its jacked just say it’s ‘abstract’”
  • you pretend to not listen,,,,but for some reason you can already feel something bad is going to happen
  • and just as you gaze over your shoulder you see one the dudes lean against the table,,,,,jaehyun’s almost done sculpture sitting dangerously close to the side
  • before you can think you open your mouth to say he should move it when,,,,,,,the dude turns to look at you and,,,,,,then you hear the sound
  • the sound,,,,,of broken marble
  • the shattered remains of jaehyun’s sculpture spread out on the floor of the studio in a sad,,,,big mess
  • and you can’t see that well across the room but jaehyun’s body has gone rigid and the group of loud boys have come to a hushed silence
  • you hear one of them swallow,,,another says they need to hurry to practice and that he’ll tell the coach jaehyun’s gonna be late
  • everyone leaves and you watch,,,wide eyed as jaehyun stares at the pile that was once all his hard work 
  • you think for a minute that,,,,,he’s going to get mad,,,,start screaming?? flailing his arms??? throwing things??? chasing that douche bag??
  • but jaehyun does nothing,,,,,he just drops to his knees and with his own hands starts to clean up
  • and you ,,,, can’t just watch anymore
  • you set down your own work and go over with a bag, crouching down next to jaehyun and helping him pick up the broken marble
  • startled he looks up,,,,and you can’t believe it when you see him try and force a smile 
  • “it’s ok, you don’t have to hel-”
  • “why didn’t you drag him back here? why didn’t you tell that asshole to go to hell? you at least deserved to do that.”
  • silently jaehyun stares at you,,,,before going back to cleaning with a small shrug
  • “it’s fine. i haven’t been working on this too long anyway.”
  • stopping you move some hair from your face and furrow your eyebrows
  • “what are you talking about, you’ve been working on this for weeks?”
  • jaehyun’s shoulders seem to drop,, his hands shaking over the remaining pieces and you hear him sigh
  • not understanding why he’s holding back so much you ask him again 
  • “why didn’t you tell him to go to-”
  • “because he’s on my team. the team,,,,,is more important right now.”
  • scoffing you push jaehyun’s hand away,,, for a second you think you’re being rude but at the same time you don’t know how to deal with that kind of logic
  • “if the team is important go to practice, i can take care of this. also ,,,,, is it jaehyun?”
  • jaehyun meets your eyes,,,suddenly sitting up straight and nodding and you shake your head
  • “don’t devalue your own work and talent. tell that guy, even if he is on your team that he should have some respect for what you do,,,,,,even if it isn’t baseball.”
  • “basketball.”
  • “what?”
  • “i,,,i play basketball”
  • “,,,,,,,,,,oh,,,,,,,wELL same thing. you should tell him off.”
  • laughing a little at yourself you make another comment that if jaehyun wants you can teach him some ‘choice’ words perfect for telling someone off but jaehyun refuses politely and says that he really cant make u clean all this up
  • but you shoo him away again and jaehyun,,,,stares at you for a moment
  • trying to remember,,,,,your name,,,,,,who you are,,,,,and when he says your name you look at him again and you’re like yes?
  • and he just fluster’s a bit and is like oh ,,, no i was just remembering it,,,im ,,im gonna go now
  • and you’re like ok? and he nearly trips over himself as he’s leaving but you just shrug it off and clean up and,,,,,really you cant believe it
  • murmuring to yourself about how if it had been your sculpture you would have lost your shit
  • but either way you find yourself going into the storage room,,,getting out a new block of marble and placing it on top of jaehyun’s work desk.
  • with a small note: ‘do it again, but this time dont keep it at the edge of the table’
  • at practice,,,jaehyun apologizes in front of the coach,,,,,and it all seems fine but also he cant,,,,,,concentrate
  • because every time he’s supposed to assist or pass the ball he can barely aim and everyone is like jaehyun???? Stop being so upset about the sculpture art is easy to pass, just make something half-assed c’mon
  • and jaehyun doesn’t say anything,,,,but it isn’t even the sculpture that has his brain in a fog,,,,,,,
  • it’s you
  • because ever since he started that class,,,,,he knew who you were,,,,but why didn’t he know anything else
  • and why ,,,,,,,,,,, was he so interested in knowing now
  • the next day,,,after coming to the studio you’d noticed that the marble was untouched ,,, which didn’t bother you but you’d hoped jaehyun would show up
  • and when he did,,,,,,,you were surprised to hear him call out to you
  • standing by the block of marble grinning,,,he pointed to it and is like “a gift from you?” and you just roll your eyes because,,,,,,,,,no it’s a gift from the school because does it look like you have money for marble
  • but jaehyun is still grinning 
  • and you’re like “get to sculpting” and he’s like ,,,,,,,,i will
  • it’s ,,,,, a comfortable silence again
  • just like usual,,,just the sound of tools and the small specks of sunlight coming through the windows
  • but this time,,,,,when you look over to see how jaehyun is doing,,,,,,you look at him hard at work
  • his strong hands working carefully and with detail ,,,, but you notice something else
  • his profile
  • soft hair,,,,long eyelashes,,,,an almost perfect nose,,,,and lips,,,,,parted in concentration with a small hint of his tongue sticking out as he sits back to study his progress
  • and you’re like @ yourself like w,,,,,,what the heck are you looking at go back to your own work
  • but it’s TOO late and you’ve been caught staring and jaehyun is like “it’s not much yet,,,,im kind of not sure what to make”
  • and you try to gather yourself and not make it look like you were totally just checking him out and you’re like 
  • “w-what about the veiled virgin or are you not gonna do that?” 
  • jaehyun scrunches up his nose (so cutely - wait what?) and goes “i want to do something ,,, original,,,,,,i kind of,,,,,well it’s embarrassing”
  • and you’re like ????? whats embarrassing
  • and jaehyun scratches the back of his neck and is like “i want to enter it in the monthly contest at the museum,,,,,,,,,,but i know im not good enough and i dont have the ti-”
  • you put up your hand and jaehyun is like ? and you’re like “that’s a great idea! you should do it, actually you’re going to do it. because you deserve it.”
  • jaehyun seem slightly confused and you tilt your head and are like “whats that look for?”
  • and he’s like n,,,nothing just no one has ever,,,,,encouraged me to do something art related it just,,,,,,feels different
  • you try to hold back a chuckle but you can’t and you’re like ,,,,, jaehyun,,,,,,,do what you want, you have talent so use it oh and also
  • jaehyun lifts his shy gaze to meet yours and you’re like
  • “also learn to tell people off seriously.”
  • and he’s like yOURE STILL ON THAT And you’re like YES I AM SERIOUSLY HOW DID YOU NOT YELL AT THAT DUDE I WOULD HAVE KILLED HIM
  • jaehyun just sighs and is like you sound like johnny he always brings up dumb stuff from the past and ur like who is johnny and jaehyun brings his hands up and is like nothing nothing ill get back to work
  • and ,,,,, it’s like that for a while,,,,,,,,,,,
  • sometimes you and jaehyun are the only two in the room working,,,,,sometimes it’s more people ,,,,,,,, 
  • but somehow,,,,,there’s something between you now maybe like an untold secret???? 
  • the fact that he hasnt told anyone else kind of makes you feel a bit special,,,but you also cant help but think,,,,,whats it like to have no one support you for that long
  • sure people are jaehyun’s basketball fans and whatnot but,,,,,does anyone tell him,,,,,,,basketball isn’t all he has to do,,,,,that art is a choice too
  • and you can’t believe it. you’re having sentimental thoughts about some BOY you’re not even that close with 
  • like UGH WHAT THE HECK 
  • you bang your head against your laptop keyboard and your friend is like dude hello u ok??? and ur like i gtg ,,,, work on my sculpture and she’s like it’s ten pm- and ur like its fine i know where the spare is 
  • and so you head over to the studio,,,,,,it’s dark in the hallway but you can see the lights are from under the crack in the door
  • and when you put your hand on the knob,,,the door opens easily
  • and you see jaehyun,,,,hunched over the marble,,,,,,and you can see that it’s the mold of someones face
  • but there doesn’t seem to be much detail in it yet and jaehyun finally notices you and smiles and he’s like “are you here to work?”
  • and you nod,,,,,coming over and looking at his sculpture before you can’t help it and go “whose it going to be?”
  • jaehyun sits back,,,,chewing on his bottom lip and going “i don’t know,,,,,”
  • you sigh and remind him that if he wants to enter it,,,he’s going to have to submit it to the museum by the end of the week and jaehyun is like i know i know
  • but then,,,,,as you’re both sitting in silence again,,,,,,jaehyun turns around and asks “are you hungry?”
  • and it’s,,,,nearing midnight but,,,,,,,a snack couldn’t hurt
  • and to your surprise jaehyun pulls out peaches and bread from his back and you’re like ??? do you just carry those around
  • and he’s like “yeah i also have protein bars in here, instant ramen - do you want ramen?”
  • and you’re like,,,,,i???? it’s ok ill take a peach
  • before you know it,,,,,your work has been abandoned and you and jaehyun are sitting across from each other talking about this and that
  • till he says something about practice tomorrow at 8 am and you realize it’s past 2 am now
  • and you both have to gather your things and sneak back to your dorms and jaehyun ,,,, before you leave
  • says that he’s thankful that sculpture of his was broken and you raise an eyebrow and he jsut smiles and is like “if it hadn’t broken,,,,,we wouldn’t have go to hang out like this.”
  • and you’re like o,,,h,,,,,,,,,,and god dammit why does jaehyun make your cool, aloof personality crumble
  • but he waves and is gone before you can blush in front of him and embarrass yourself
  • ,,,,,,and it’s like,,,,,,,,,now it isn’t just two art students in a class together,,,,,,it’s friends
  • finally the last day of the week comes and you’re in the studio,,,looking at jaehyun whose covered his sculpture with a towel and you’re like ,,,,,,,jaehyun show it to me
  • and he’s just giving you a sly smile and is like you’ll see it at the museum
  • and you’re like ,,,,,,,,heY where would you be if i didn’t encourage you now show me-
  • but before you can finish your argument the door opens again and jaehyun’s basketball teammates appear again 
  • out of precaution jaehyun moves his sculpture to the table behind him and you give most of them an unamused look as they start touching this and that
  • jaehyun asks whats up and one of the guys is like “c’mon, coach wants us to have a big meeting about strategy for next week.” 
  • you look at jaehyun and then at the sculpture
  • “jaehyun has to come with me to the museum, tell the coach he’ll be there later.”
  • jaehyun turns to look at you,,,,,whose speaking with your hands crossed over your chest
  • the teammates just laugh and are like “and you are?”
  • and you’re like “jaehyun’s classmate. we’re submitting our sculptures to the museum. the deadlines in an hour so,,,,,,,he’ll be there later.”
  • the laughter stops and one of the teammates steps toward you
  • standings tall,,,,,,obviously since he’s also a basketball player,,,,,you don’t let it intimidate you but at the same time you realize that there’s four more people,,,,,,,four more people who dont want jaehyun to go with you
  • “i don’t think i remember jaehyun saying anything about that. so,,,,,he’ll be going with us.”
  • you frown and open your mouth but suddenly jaehyun steps in front of you and lets one hand rest on your wrist
  • and he’s like “guys, ill go with you. no big deal.”
  • turning to you,,,,jaehyun mouths for you to let it go but you can’t,,,,because again,,,,,,basketball is in the way of something else he loves
  • and you’re like “no you won’t, jaehyun you need to submit the sculpture in person -”
  • jaehyun just smiles,,,but you can see the sadness in his eyes and he says its fine, there’s next month.
  • with that,,,you watch him follow his teammates out and you’re left alone,,,,,jaehyun’s hidden sculpture on the table beside you
  • ,,,,,,,,,,,,then you realize,,,,,,,,you can do it.
  • you can submit it for him
  • and carefully, you take the art into your arms and make way for the museum because there isn’t anyway you’re going to let jaehyun’s talent go to waste this time
  • and when you do get there,,,the woman accepting them asks for your name and you go “jung jaehyun” and she scribbles it down and asks what the name of the sculpture is
  • and you’re like,,,,,,,,,well you don’t even know because you didn’t even have the time to LOOK at it
  • so you kind of panic and blurt out ‘the one’,,,,,,thinking it is his first sculpture,,,,,and it is a person,,,,,,,,,so maybe its someone special?????
  • the woman waves her hand and says you may go
  • and with a beating heart you leave the museum and on the train back to school you think,,,,,,why didn’t you look at the sculpture?? were you scared,,,,,were you????? jealous of who it could be??
  • shaking off the idea you think that what matters now is if he wins or not
  • ,,,,,,,,,and like clockwork the results come out and eagerly you visit the museums website and,,,,,,,,,,,
  • the winner,,,,,,jung jaehyun’s,,,,,,sculpture,,,,,,’the one’ 
  • and looking at the photo you almost drop out of your chair because the sculpture,,,,,,,,,,,the sculpture looks like you
  • and with no time to waste you dash out of your dorm,,,headed straight to the gym where you didn’t realize that there is going to be a game tonight
  • and the place is packed with students even though it doesnt start for another hour and you fight through the crowds on the bleachers
  • managing to get up to the court and jaehyun,,,,,whose doing stretches notices you
  • because well,,,,,,,out of excitement you literally run ONTO the court 
  • and the ref and coach are yelling at you to stop but you don’t hear them and jaehyun is like “what are you-”
  • and you run right into his arms and you’re like “jAEHYUN YOU WON!! YOUR SCULPTURE IS IN THE MUSEUM”
  • and jaehyun is frozen,,,,,,the entire gym staring at you two and an uproar of whispers about how one jaehyun is,,,,,,an art major???? two,,,,,jaehyun is dating,,,,,,,you????? i mean you are in his arms?????? you did run acROSS THE COURT to see him????/
  • pulling back you look at jaehyun,,,,who seems to still be processing what you’ve said and he’s like h-how i didn’t submit it? and ur like i went,,,,i put it in and i,,,,,,,,i didn’t look at it but then i saw it on the website and jaehyun,,,,,,,,,,jaehyun was it me?
  • turning cherry red,,jaehyun stutters over his answer but it’s obviously a yes and you grin and jaehyun is like “you inspired me,,,,,,i mean you were the only one to say,,,,,,i deserved it.”
  • and your smile grows wider and you’re like you do,,,,jaehyun look you did it,,,,because you’re talented and i -
  • without knowing how to put it into words you lean in and jaehyun reflexively puts his hands on either side of your face to pull you closer and it’s a kiss
  • right there in front of the whole gym
  • (which you later realize and get vERY embarrassed about)
  • but in the moment it’s perfect and,,,,,,,,,when you pull back you’re like 
  • “oh one more thing before i go because your coach looks like he might murder me -”
  • and jaehyun is like yes?? and you look around and find the dude who had broken jaehyun’s sculpture and you yell out his number and ur like “yeah you number 5,,,,,,,,,,,,this is me telling you off because jaehyun is too nice: GO TO HELL’ ok bye now”
  • and with that you dash off the court before the coach can chase you and jaehyun is standing there,,,,,lovestruck but also shocked
  • and the team is like what the hell jaehyun and he just shrugs because honestly,,,,,,,,,,,,,,you’re wild and he,,,,,,
  • he freaking loves it
  •  you do get banned from games for a while,,,,,but its worth it
  • you hear that jaehyun won the game the next morning,,,mostly because you wake up to find all your friends standing over you demanding to know why the mvp of the uni basketball team just said in his winning interview that his significant other,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,YOU,,,,,,,,,,,really inspired him tonight
  • and you’re like ,,,,me/?? jaehyun??? my??? boyfriend??? and they’re like YEAH EXPLAIN
  • but you dont even know what to say because everything is kind of a blur and did kissing jaehyun in front of the whole student body mean you were now dating??? who knows
  • well jaehyun knows so thats why you go to find him
  • and you do,,,, he’s doing another run on the uni’s track field and when he spots you he smiles and comes over and you’re like heY,,,,,,,,,so,,,,,,,,
  • and he’s like “i,,,,,,hope you,,,,,,,,,didnt mind me calling you my,,,,,,,,,,,s-s-s-s-”
  • “signigicant other?”
  • “,,,y,,,yes”
  • you kind of pretend to make a face and think about it,,,,rocking back and forth on your heels and you’re like hMMM well,,,,,,,
  • and jaehyun’s eyes turn into puppy eyes and he’s oh,,,no did i make you mad-
  • and you just lean up and kiss his cheek and you’re like nah, i like this straightforward jaehyun much more so,,,,,,,be like this more 
  • jaehyun blushing: than can i be honest
  • you: sure
  • jaehyun: ,,,,,,,did you like the sculpture?
  • you: i loved it. also,,,,i never knew someone could make me look so pretty
  • jaehyun: you’re stunning
  • you, blushing and trying to hide it behind your hands: ok,,,tOO straightforward
  • jaehyun throws his arm around you and you guys get off the track field and it’s,,,,cute because you’re walking across campus like an ACTUAL couple and okay,,,,this is,,,,,,something you could get used to
  • but yes dating jaehyun is like dating the sweetest boy who ever lived and ,,,,,,,,,,,wow do his friends really not let anyTHING go
  • you finally meet johnny and the first thing he says is “so,,,,,we gonna get a repeat of that basketball court smooch OH and dont forget the part where you told the dude to go to hell” and you’re like oh my god jaehyun you compared me tO HIM
  • and jaehyun is like oh,,,,,,,you know what i am sorry about that john here is special
  • john: excuse me,,,,,,jeffery
  • you: jeffery? 
  • jaehyun: if it were not for the fact that im a soft angelic person i would have kill-
  • but the rest of nct all really like you because,,,,,,basically you help jaehyun out of his shell,,,,,,
  • taeil and ten especially because wow they havent ever seen jaehyun so open and happy to talk about art???? like they’ve known about his passion but,,,,,you’ve let him explore
  • also oh my god you can really shut johnny up ,,,, but it even works on doyoung???? like one look and walla,,,,,,,,they’re convinced you have magic powers
  • but in reality it’s because you gave doyoung a noogie and made him apologize for asking jaehyun if he could make a sculpture of taeyong’s face
  • jaehyun is the kind of boyfriend that becomes more comfortable with time,,,,which you don’t mind because taking it slow isn’t bad
  • like if holding hands is all he wants to do in public than of course you’ll respect that
  • but also when you steal kisses every now and then while he’s studying or sketching you can liteRALLY feel his face heat up 
  • and you’re like how are you so handsome and yet so,,,,,easily flustered???? and jaehyun is like,,,,i ,,,,,,,,u,,,,,,kiss,,,,,,,,a,,,h,,, i need some water
  • he has a packed schedule between practice and spending more time on his art and you can tell when he hasn’t gotten any rest because he starts getting bags under his eyes and doesnt smile
  • and even though it’s kind of attractive,,,,you hate seeing him like that so you’ll literally sit in front of him and feed him lunch and be like “go to sleep on time, idc if the guys want to hang out after practice do you want to pass out tomorrow in class? no? exactly.”
  • someone once said you were a bossy s/o and u were like excuse m- but jaehyun just went ‘i would die without them so politely, leave us alone.’ 
  • but even with all your worry,,,, jaehyun has also taught you to be a bit softer
  • because yeah you always want to tell off his mean teammates or his over pressuring coach but jaehyun reminds you that sometimes in life you need to girt your teeth and take it
  • the amount of times he’s just pulled you into his arms when you’re fuming to calm you down,,,,,,,,you’ve lost count 
  • does the thing where he nuzzles his nose into the top of your hair and you can feel him grip onto you a little tighter
  • and you realize that even though he’s strong, handsome, and smart,,,,,,even people so perfect need comfort and closeness 
  • jaehyun let’s you wear his clothes but not without him denying that it’s his clothes is someone asks even though doyoung is like i literally gave you that hoodie like a year ago for christmas and jaehyun is like,,,,,,,,,,,i,,,,,,,,,,um
  • and you’re like yeah its his we just spent an hour cuddling in his bed so i wanted to wear i-
  • jaehyun laughing really loud over you like hAHAHA we nEED To go bYE dOYOUNG
  • it’s hard now to work in the same room on your art because you and jaehyun get distracted and its like u can go maybe an hour before one or the other comes over and you guys start talking and its just,,,,,,
  • heart eyes @ each other from then on out 
  • whenever he smiles and the dimples come out you literally are like let me take a photo and jaehyun is like but u have 394302 photos of me smiling,,,,and ur like i can never have enough i love dimple
  • whenever you want to go on dates,,, jaehyun always suggests something outdoorsy and active and sometimes you forget that jaehyun is Good At All the Sports
  • and it’s like dating an olympic athlete,,,,,,you cannot keep up most of the time,,,,,,,
  • but its fine because jaehyun,,,even though he’s trying to run up this mountain,,,,,will contain himself just for you ildjsfg
  • gets corny when he sees kids and is like “a family,,,,,,in the future would be so nice,,,,,,,,” and you’re like “you’re smiling like a dad jaehyun” and he’s like oOPS,,,,,,,,but it’s,,,,,,,,,it’s cute 
  • you can see that he’s so gentle and caring with everyone he meets you can’t help but be like,,,,,,,,he is,,,,,,going to be a great parent some day
  • you didnt believe he could cook well too when ten told you about jaehyun’s secret delicious ramen
  • but then you guys were making some,,,jaehyun standing at the stove,,,,and you sitting on the kitchen counter and when he’d feed you you were like hOLY SHIT THIS IS AMAZING 
  • and jaehyun just laughed and u were just like jaehyun tell me baby are you a robot because you’re good at everything
  • and he was shy but he was like no im real here ill prove it,,,,,,he kissed you and u were like ur right robots can’t do that with their tong-
  • jaehyun: AnYWAY
  • you once stayed at his dorm for a date and when jaehyun picked beauty and the beast you kinda teased him a bit ,,, but also ended up cuddled up together crying about the beast’s backstory
  • and then making out for like an hour because it’s hard not to when jaehyun just wears sweats ,,,,,,and your shirt is really loose,,,,,,,,, and jaehyun is good at kissing,,,,,,,,,,,,very good,,,,,,,,,,,,, and -
  • but mark came back pretty early and you guys had to pretend you were just playing cards instead
  • mark: i didnt know your hair could be so messy playing cards. huh
  • you and jaehyun sweating like uH,,,,,
  • you’d managed to sneak into one of his games but unfortunately instead of staying quiet you’d basically yelled for jaehyun to CRUSH the other team and the coach had to chase you out again
  • but you waited outside of the gym and instead of kissing the trophy and celebrating jaehyun had ran straight outside to you and honestly,,,,,,,,,what could the coach do about that? LOL
  • jaehyun jokingly challenging you to some basketball but since he wouldn’t let you score you were like fine i wont kiss u for a whole week
  • and jaehyun basically begged for you to not be mad and u just couldn’t resist
  • like have you seen jaehyun’s big,,,brown eyes????
  • you’d caved and just started kissing his face all over and jaehyun just grinning and hold you around the waist and ,,,,,,,,,basically you two being super duper cute
  • someone complimenting jaehyun’s artwork: you smugly going that’s my boyfriend and yes he’s amazing and did i mention that he’s taken,,,,i love him
  • jaehyun blushing but also loving the fact that you love him so openly and unapologetically 
  • and wow let me mention this one last time: jaehyun in a basketball uniform but also,,,,,,,,,,jaehyun concentrating hard on a sculpture with a low cut shirt and big hands covered in clay,,,,,,,,like ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,yall

doyoung taeyong | yuta | bangtan | vixx | monsta x | got7 + kard + amber | seventeen

Tips for Beginners

When typing this title, my phone autocorrected it to “Tips for Whiners” which is hilarious given the circumstances surrounding this post. However, my conscience got the best of me and I decided to title it differently even though there was peer pressure for the original title. However, not all beginners are whiners (by far) and I figured it wasn’t fair to lump people into a group. Plus, this post is meant to be far more informative and encouraging than it is critical and teasing.

New writers are always looking for help and tools to use to get their writing “out there,” wherever that is. They want to build their audience, which means gaining followers and notes on posts. They seek out help, work on their blogs, and write a lot.

However, some new writers fall into a trap of jealousy and complaining. They become frustrated, then turn their frustration into jealousy. They whine about not getting notes and followers, they complain about blogging cliques and unfair treatment, and they adopt an attitude of “Woe is me. The blogosphere is against me.”

This post is meant to be helpful to each group by providing both useful tips and reality checks. At no point do I actually mean to be hateful. Am I sassy, though? Yes. You can stop reading this post at any time, too. You can also take what works for you and throw out the rest. Nothing here is a blanket statement. 

But let’s just get on with it. ( And it is a long one)

Keep reading

// I know this didn’t really ask for nsfw but I still felt it
so slight nsfw ahead

no
soup
for
waluigi

Zen:

- He was on break at rehearsals when his phone lit up, alerting him that he had gotten a message from you.

- Instantly he’s like Oh boy!! It’s my angel coming to wish me good luck!!!

- Then he opens it with a big grin expecting a cute little note and holy shit he literally drops his phone and a coworker goes to pick it up for him and he sCREAMS NO DONT TOUCH THAT

- Instantly finds a closet or bathroom and might send you a quick nude tbh even if you were just in underwear with a dirty message he’ll send a dick pic or something no shame

- He’s so turned on by the situation of receiving something like that in public not gonna lie, it’s so exhilarating and from his picture.. you can tell he’s pretty excited ,,

- Messes up his lines a lot after that because all he can think of is fucking you when he gets home and just wants the day to be done

- Expect the beast to be released as soon as he steps through that door


Jumin:

- In the middle of a meeting when you sent it, it was a pretty boring one so he decided to break his table manners and look at it anyways

- When he opens it he gets chills THE GOOD KIND you know when you eat something that tastes like jesus tears or see something really aesthetic, yeah that’s the chills he gets because it was so unexpected and he literally worships your body

- His eyebrows raise too which cause a lot of people to notice he isn’t paying attention and they call him out on it so he has no choice but to leave you on read

- That’s terrifying for you because is he mad?? did he not like it? Why is there no response

- As soon as he escapes from the meeting he calls you and asks a million questions

- He’s asking about how new the lingerie is, the designer, literally everything like what the fucc Jumin why is this important

- But expect amazing phone sex once he gets into his personal office because he’s so worked up about that picture he can’t help himself, its fun to imagine what you’re doing on the other line as well.

Yoosung:

- POOR BABY WAS IN SCHOOL WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS

- His knees sHOOT UP and hit the desk when he gets the picture and the professor starts to get really upset with him shit

- At lunch break he’ll text you back with a million cringey emojis and saying how he needs a warning next time babe his boner was so obvious to hide while walking out of class

- Start to send dirty messages and he will flip; his face is so red people are like hey Yoosung are you okay?? literally looks like he’s having an allergic reaction.

- If he gets away to hide in the bathroom he WONT send a nude but he’ll send a picture of him in the mirror with a tomato face captioned “ look at what you’ve done to me!! ;; ” and it’s just adorable, screensaver material


Jaehee:

- Like Jumin, she was in the middle of a meeting when she got your message. But waits until everyone’s packing up their things to check it so she doesn’t seem disrespectful.

- As soon as she opens it she’s super surprised and audibly gasps which causes people to start to turn and look she doesn’t know what to do

- So she really quick clicks off her phone and ignores all questions until she can rush to the bathroom or somewhere private to.. take a closer look, at your picture.

- She compliments you because damn you look great how is her girlfriend a literal goddess?? But Love.. im at work right now.

- Exactly that’s the fun it it ~

- She won’t send one back but she might send a few suggestive messages about the things she’s going to do in order to punish you big time when she gets home. dominator jaehee everyone

Seven:

- He hadn’t come out of his office in days and you were sick of him just coming out to pee or eat some food like no seven, eat me

- The chatroom was the place where you could talk to him because he was in there every so often, so that was nice at least.

- It was just you and him in there, sending pointless messages of jumbled words back and forth. Before you decided to surprise him a bit.

- As soon as you send a revealing picture in the chatroom he literally screams because everyone can see that MC n o

- Saves it right away though before scrambling to delete it from the messenger

- Finally once it’s gone he makes his way to the bedroom to find you, in the same outfit youd worn in the picture. But it looked so much more better in person. expect to be punished with the wrath of god seven-zero-seven himself

V:

- He was at a dinner with some friends who also were photographers, they were just chatting back and forth about different projects and such.

- V had already been shooting you a few texts here and there but didn’t want to seem rude so the conversation was sort of inconsistent.

- He sent a message asking what you were doing all by yourself back home and holy shit the picture you send him makes him jump so fast he hits the table and everyone looks

- His face is really red and everyone asks if he’s okay, he replies yes before apologizing; excusing himself to the restroom.

- When he’s in there he just stares at the picture and gets really flushed and warm before messaging back, something romantic honestly he’s not great at dirty talk

- Fidgety the entire dinner, he can’t focus on conversation all he can think of is what you’re doing at home without him.

Saeran:

- He had been so focused in his computer work that he’d been ignoring you most of the day.

- The first few texts he just glanced at until he saw a picture notification and grew curious. As soon as he opens it he pushes all his work aside to find you.

- Who knew a simple little nude could motivate him so much?

- But he can’t find you anywhere?? Responds asking where are you before saving the picture ;;)

- Saeran.. I was in your office the whole time

- HOW DIDNT HE NOTICE

- Comes back to his office right away and holy shit there you are, all laid out for him like a perfect little present?? He feels terrible for not even noticing you there but he’ll make up for it.

@yuriplisetsky is a size queen

Otabek Altin/Yuri Plisetsky

2,900 words

“What are you talking about?”

“Your Twitter? Your thread that spends about ten tweets waxing poetry about the size of my dick? Everyone’s talking about it, the fans are going crazy, I had Victor ringing me up half an hour ago to ask if it was true and if I really had deflowered Russia’s Fairy like that, and I just – what the hell were you thinking, Yuri?”

In which Yuri gets drunk and Tweets some things he probably shouldn’t have.

AO3 link


So @94mercy made this post that headcanoned that Yuri gets drunk one night and talks about the size of Otabek’s dick on social media, and I immediately knew I had to write it. Otherwise known as me just wanting to join in with all the hung!Otabek content that’s been coming out of this fandom in recent weeks. 

(Also tagging @daddybek because that’s where this all started back in February)


They’ve been dating for a few months when it happens.

Yuri goes round to Mila’s for a few drinks after practice one day, and they steadily make their way through a bottle of vodka, laughing and talking about their respective partners. The music is loud and Yuri feels all loose and giggly as he reaches for his phone, taking selfies and documenting their escapades on Snapchat. He’s never been this drunk before, so drunk he’s not even sure what order his memories from the last few hours go in, so drunk that he can barely stand, so drunk that the room is spinning.

He sits down and opens Twitter, starting to type. He doesn’t even think about what he’s Tweeting, just starts a thread and keeps on going until he gets it all off his chest. Mila is grabbing at his hands and pulling him up so they can dance together again, and Yuri’s phone lies on the couch, forgotten.

So he doesn’t see what he’s done until morning.

Keep reading

What Happened?

Word Count: 3385

A/N: I wrote this in French Thursday, and then my French teacher got onto my laptop from hers and closed out of it, and I almost had a heart attack because she didn’t save it lol, but I remembered that I had sent it to my email before hand and all I had to do was finish the fic because she deleted the ending, so phew. Hope you enjoy it! Much love!

Warnings: Violence, swearing (duh, I mean its my writing sooo), debating on whether they want to live.

Originally posted by riverrdxle


Originally posted by betty-and-jughead

MasterList 

   The past few days had been weird ones for Y/N, no one ever noticed she was around. For the first couple of days, she figured it was because of her accident, maybe they just wanted to give her space. She didn’t remember much of it, it hurt her physically to try to remember, all she knew was that one second, she was following a lead with Jughead on Jason Blossoms murder and the next she was on the ground and her head was pounding. But after the first few days of trying to talk to her friends and them just walking away, or the waiters at Pops and even pops himself ignoring her presence in the diner, she figured she had done something wrong. She pissed all of Riverdale off, and she didn’t know how she could fix it.

     Since she had moved here, these people had been her family, the ones who picked her up after she had fallen. Moving alone to a new town was hard, especially because she was only 16, but they made it easier. She quickly became friends with the core four, which had now become the core five, with the occasional tag along of Kevin or Cheryl, and Alice Cooper, FP Jones, and Fred Andrews all had offered to take her in or help her at one point in her stay, no matter the circumstances of their own home life. She had even started dating Jughead, the beanie-clad writer who also happened to be her best friend.

    It was never supposed to get this bad, and she didn’t know how her accident had made everyone hate her. Jughead and her had found a lead on Jason, deciding that going down to Sweetwater River to look for clues on their lead was a good idea.

___

    “Ready to go?” Jughead asked, taking a flashlight in his hand and looking over to Y/N.

    “I am. Let’s do this Jones.” She said, taking a flashlight in her own hand and fallowing Jughead out of the car. Archie stayed behind, he was going to wait for the two of them to return after they were done looking around. They made their way down to the water, looking around for any indication that Jason could have been down there, going to the place where he was found. They searched for a half hour to no avail, with nothing coming up.

___

    Y/N sat in her room, her head starting to pound again as she tried her best to recall that night. She must have done something, there had to be an explanation. She heard familiar voices outside her apartment and she got off her bed, looking out the window to see Veronica and Betty walking by. They looked up to her window, and she smiled and waved down, hoping that they would wave back but they quickly turned their heads down. Y/N felt her heart sink, there they went again, ignoring her.

    “I just can’t believe what happened.” Betty said, and Y/N listened in, hoping to catch a bit of their conversation before they walked away.

    “I can’t either, this doesn’t feel real. It was so unfair what happened to her, I mean hell, it was unfair to the town.” Veronica replied, a tinge of sadness in her voice.

    ‘what did I do that was so unfair to Riverdale?’ she thought to herself.

    “Why were her and Jughead even investigating down there, anyways? Didn’t they know it was dangerous? The killer could still be lurking around. I mean obviously he was.” Veronica questioned, and Betty nodded her head.

    “I’m just glad Jughead didn’t get hurt too, but its still heartbreaking about what happened to Y/N. She was one of our best friends, and she had just moved here too-“ Betty choked up on her words, and Veronica pulled her into her side, trying to comfort the blonde-haired girl.

    “I know.” Veronica said, and with that the two of them walked out of earshot from Y/N, who stood near her window just as confused as ever.

    ‘What the hell happened to me? Why can’t I remember? And why did they seem so sad?’ Y/Ns thoughts raced as more questions than answers were coming at her. She wanted more than anything to know what was going on, she wanted to be with her friends again. Slowly, she backed up until the backs of her legs hit the bed and she fell back onto it.

____

    “Jughead, we should go.” Y/N said, kicking around a few leaves that had fallen to the ground. Jughead stood up and ran his hand through his hair, sighing in frustration.

    “We haven’t searched everything, there could still be evidence, we’re just missing it.” He tried to argue, but Y/N rolled her eyes.

    “There’s nothing out here, Juggie. We need to go back, Archie is probably getting mad. We told him we’d only be out here a few minutes, not a half hour.” She said, putting her hand on her hip.

    “A half hour is a few minutes, anyways, I’m sure he’s finding plenty of ways to entertain himself.” He teased, and Y/N rolled her eyes.

    “Well I’m going back, and I don’t want you out here alone. Are you coming or are you not?” she asked, and Jughead looked at her for a second before answering, thinking over his options.

    “You can go if you’re bored, I’ll only be a few more minutes.” He said, shining his flashlight down again and looking through the brush.

    “I don’t want you to be out here alone, please come with me, we can return later.” She begged, but to no avail.

    “Any evidence that might be here now could be gone later, its better if I look around now.” He said, slightly annoyed.

   “Jughead, please-“

   “Go!” Jughead yelled, taking Y/N by surprise. His eyes immediately went back to the ground, continuing his searching, and Y/N rolled her eyes.

   “Fine, but when I get kidnapped in these woods because you didn’t take me back to Archies car, don’t get mad at me, get mad at yourself for being an ass.” She spat, walking away.

____

    Y/N cringed at her last memory, her harsh words cutting deep into her, she couldn’t even imagine what they did to him.

    ‘That’s why he hasn’t talked to me, he’s mad.’ She thought to herself, getting up from her bed, but her head was spinning. Trying to remember what happened was taking a toll on her, and she didn’t understand why. She got up from her bed and walked out of her apartment, making her way to Archies house. She was going to apologize to Jughead, and she was going to try to get Archie to talk to her while she was at  it. She wanted her friends back, she wanted them back more than anything.

    As she walked down the streets of Riverdale, she noticed how empty and barren they looked. Barely any cars went by, people were scarce and none of them smiled or waved back at her when she did it to them. She hung her head low, keeping her attention on the road in front of her, she didn’t want to show her face around town at the moment, but she needed to get to her friends and make up with her boyfriend.

____

    Y/N walked slowly through the woods, trying to make her way back to Archies truck, although she didn’t completely remember where he had parked it. As she kicked around the rocks and leaves at her feet, she spotted a shiny something in the debris on the ground, and she bent over to pick it up. It was a credit card with the name of Clifford Blossom on it. What the hell was his credit card doing out here? She turned it around and almost dropped it out of shock, the back had blood splattered on it, she turned the card back around and noticed there was some on the front as well.

    “Jughead! Jughead, I think I found something!” she yelled, turning back around to run towards the direction of Jughead. She heard footsteps and the cracking of leaves and twigs coming from the distance, and she felt relief fall over her slightly, he was coming. “It’s a credit card with some blood on it, I think it could be Jasons blood, and you’ll never guess what name is on it.” She called, trying to find her way through the trees.

    “Whose name?” a voice said from behind her, it definitely didn’t sound like Jughead. She turned but before she could see the face, she was knocked over, a blow to her head had thrown her to the ground and she grabbed her head that was now in excruciating pain.

    “What the fuck!” she cried, the world starting to go black. Another hit to her head knocked her out, the last thing she remembered was a scream, but she couldn’t even remember if it was from her or not.

____

    Y/N fell to the ground, the world spinning and she cried out in agonizing pain. Her head hurt like a bitch, and she didn’t know where she was for a good few seconds. After the pain resided, fear set in. She remembered what happened, but she was still confused. How did her getting hit in the head offend anyone in the town? Maybe whoever hit her found out she was accusing Jasons own father of killing him, and they were all mad about that. I mean who accuses the father? He was already cleared, wasn’t he? That had to be it. It was the only explanation. She slowly looked up and found that she had collapsed on Archies front lawn, the sun shining behind the house in front of her. She got up as slowly as possible to not trigger another dizzy spell, and made her way to the front door.

   She walked up the front steps and hesitated knocking on the door. She was scared, what if they didn’t want to talk to her, or see her ever again. What if they opened the door and slammed it in her face after seeing who it was. She didn’t think she could handle their rejection, especially not right now. She was weak and needed her friends, but they obviously wanted space from her, why else would they ignore her these past few days. Just then, she heard talking coming from inside the house, and it was making its way towards the front door, and out of panic she hid. The door swung open and Archie came out first, and he looked sad. Jughead came next, looking the same way, and Y/Ns heart dropped.

    “It sucks that we have to do this.” Archie said, opening his side of the car.

    “I-it hurts that we have to do this.” Jughead replied, getting into the car and Archie followed.

    “I know Jughead, it hurts us all that we have to do this.” Archie said. “Maybe today will be the day. First stop though, gas station, and the hospital.” And with that, Archie closed the door to his car, started it, and they drove off.

    ‘Why the hospital?’ Y/N thought to herself. Closing her eyes, she did her best to remember what might have happened next, sure she got attacked but maybe she was missing something.

____

    “Y/N! Y/N can you hear me?” Jugheads voice rang through her head, hurting it more than it already did. She barely opened her eyes, looking up to see the beanie clad boys face stained with tears, worry written all over him. “Come on, please say something! Let me know you’re alright!” She went to go speak, opening her mouth slightly and tried to tell him she was hurt but not to worry, but no words came out. Her head started to throb again, the pain becoming even more unbearable than before, and she started to slip into the blackness again.

    “Archie?” Jugheads voice yelled through his phone. “Get out here and help me with Y/N, someone attacked her!” Y/N could barely hear Jugheads voice now, slowly, she was fading although she tried so hard not to. “What do you mean ‘what do you mean she was attacked’? She was hit over the head with something, the person who did it ran off and now she’s bleeding all over the place!” Y/N could hear the panic in Jugheads voice, and she could also tell he was fighting back tears and anger. He didn’t mean to be angry at Archie, he just wasn’t listening nor being all that smart in this situation.

    “She isn’t responding, please, Arch just get out here and help me take her to your car, we don’t have time to argue! And call Kevin and his dad, they need to get police down here as well, see if they can find the man who did this!” Jughead pleaded, breaking down into more tears. Archie must have agreed because Jughead threw his phone down on the ground and went right back for Y/N, running his hand over her hair, and grabbing her hand. “You’re going to be fine, okay? I’ll make sure you make it, but you have to help me out. I don’t know if you can hear me, but you’re not allowed to die, you’re not allowed to leave me. I need you, Y/N, and I know I’ve never told you this but I love you.” Y/N could feel the pull of death, or sleep, she couldn’t tell which one, all she knew was that she was fading, and Jugheads words rang in her head. Everything went silent, everything went dark.

____

   “Is she in there?’ Y/N heard Jughead ask, and she opened her eyes and found herself in the middle of a waiting room. A nurse dressed in teal scrubs nodded and Jughead and Archie started to make their way to the room, but the nurse stopped them.

    “You can’t go in right now, the doctor is in there. If you take a seat and wait a few moments, I can call you over when its time.” The nurse suggested, and the two boys nodded and walked to some chairs, taking a seat. Y/N though was curious to see who had also gotten hurt, maybe Kevin or one of the police officers had gotten hurt trying to find the man who attacked her, maybe it was even one of their friends. Either way, she had to see, she had to find out who was in that room, they could answer a few questions for her. Slowly, she snuck over into the hallway where the door was and slipped in through the door, quietly closing it behind her. She took one glance at the hospital bed and froze.

    ‘This can’t be. This is impossible.’ She thought to herself, willing herself to move towards the bed. There she was, laying in a hospital bed, wires patches stuck in and on her, she looked…dead. But she was alive, she had to be, she had been walking and watching everyone for days. Y/N couldn’t be the one in the bed because she was standing beside it. ‘I’m dreaming. I have to be dreaming.’

    “She’s still sleeping, but you’re welcome to stick around if you’d like.” The nurse from earlier said, swinging the door open and letting Jughead and Archie in. Jughead walked sorrowfully to the bed, standing right beside Y/N, the ‘awake’ one.

    “Do you think she’ll wake up?” Archie asked, and the nurse gave an apologetic look towards the two boys and the girl.

    “The doctor doesn’t think so, she has major head trauma. He thinks she’ll be in a coma for awhile.” She said, and Archie nodded his head, not really wanting to hear any more. “I’m sorry boys.” And with that, the nurse left. Jughead and Archie sat by the girls side in silence for a long time, the rain from outside spilling against the window, and the thunder and beeping machines were the only noises that filled the room. Y/N stood beside them, staring down at her sleeping body. No wonder everyone was ignoring her, she wasn’t even awake.

    ‘This is some supernatural shit.’ She thought to herself, waving her hand in front of the two boys faces. ‘I didn’t even know this was possible, this is the weirdest thing ever.’ Y/N slowly started reaching for her hand, and softly went to touch it. Right as real skin hit her… ghost skin? What even was she? Either way, right as she touched her real hand, she started to feel dizzy, the world around her spun, and she noticed as her real self started to wake. Her head moved side from side, and her breathing started to become ore audible. She quickly pulled her hand back, and everything returned to normal, well not normal per say, but she wasn’t dizzy.

    “I need you to wake up.” Jughead whispered, breaking the silence of the room. “Please, I need you to wake up. I need you with me, don’t leave me.” Archie placed his hand on Jugheads back, trying to comfort his hurting friend. “I love you, and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself knowing that the last things you heard me say to you were to leave.” He was crying now, and Y/N felt her heart drop.

    Did she even want to wake up though, honestly. Life was hard for her, being 16 and living alone. Depression was a bitch, and anxiety made it even worse for her, and as much as she would deny it, she felt as if she needed her blood family to get through all of this shit that was going on, but she didn’t have them. She made the choice to leave, she decided she was going to be better off without them and she was wrong. Sure her friends were practically her new family, but were they going to be enough, would they leave her? She sat on the edge of the hospital bed, looking down at her sleeping self and she was worried about what would happen if she decided to wake up.  

  She glanced from her sleeping figure to the two boys who were standing by her side, looking sorrowfully down at her, she couldn’t leave them, could she? They obviously cared for her, and they wanted her to come back, who was she to willfully leave them? She wouldn’t be able to do that to them, they also had shit going on in their lives, and it seemed like they needed her, she helped them and they helped her. She noticed now that Archie was crying as well, but Jughead hadn’t realized it because he was crying so heavily himself. She couldn’t stand to see them like this, she had to come back. Time was only time, it passes and so do situations, all of these things that were bothering her now could be but a memory in a few years, and she could have a chance to be happy. Jugheads head fell onto the sleeping girls stomach, and she reached for the hand by his head. Grabbing it, her world started to spin again, and the girl in the beds head started to move, and again she started to wake up. Her head started to pound, but she pushed through the pain, she’d be alright soon.

    Y/Ns eyes slowly fluttered open and she felt a weight on her stomach, which she remembered was Jugheads head. She took her hand and placed it on Jugheads head, to which he shot up and looked at her, and she took her other hand and reached it out to Archie. The redheaded boy quickly took it, and Jughead took her other one, the two of them now crying of happiness.

   “Jughead?” her voice came out coarse and rough. “Archie?”

    “I’m here! Thank god you’re awake!” Archie said, a sigh of relief leaving his being.

    “Thank you for waking up, thank you so much. I love you Y/N, and I’m so sorry.” Jughead said, kissing her hand.

    “Betty! Get Veronica, Kevin and Cheryl and come down to the hospital, she woke up!” Archie yelled excitedly through his phone, and Y/N smiled. She had made the right decision to come back.


@do-not-call-me-sunshine@gelattoes@xbobaaa@katshrev@farmfreshcoldsprouts@sgarrett49@always-chocolate@nadya0128@vegaslodgeprimary@rainbows-and-glitter-bitch@lost-in-wonderland-x@aezthetically@mrs-jughead-jones @nafa1604 @moonlight53 @mydelightfulcollectiontyphoon

Second time out/back from seeing Beauty and the Beast **SPOILERS ABOUND**

(aka bear with me b/c this review is a week and a half late and I can actually comment on stuff I loved throughout it. It might end up being long af so I’m sorry in advance bc I talk about when everyone got cast too. This is probably filled with typos.)

PPS: I am the minority who loved it deeply, and don’t have nothing to complain about. Except a few words on the group of people who sat beside me tonight and would not shut up during Evermore and the transformation scene aka MY MOST FAVOURITE DISNEY KISS EVER)

So lets get down to it. I LOVED this movie the first time I saw it. As I have stated numerous times through tags. Ill be real here I was skeptical as hell about this being turned into a LA remake. But as the casting was announced my worries went away completely?

BECAUSE JESUS CHRIST WHAT A FABULOUS CAST! I don’t even know who to start with honestly? All of them ARE JUST SO GOOD???

We’ll just start with the most obvious choice (and the one who had the most flack after being cast)

And that is the absolute wonder and light of my life DAN FUCKING STEVENS

BECAUSE THIS GUY. OMG. ANYTHING HE DID IN THIS MOVIE JUST…BLEW. ME. THE. FUCK. AWAY??? And I’m just so grateful and forever indebted to him for bringing quite possibly the best reinterpretation of the Beast/Adam to life. Like honestly the Beast is my favourite character ever he has been since I was 5 and I just…NO AMOUNT OF WORDS COULD DESCRIBE IT. (actually I have TONS of words and i’ll get more into this later) but I’m moving on for now.

Emma Thompson I love Emma T so much I have since forever and she’s so charming and soft hearted as Mrs Potts. Say what you will about the accents used in this movie I loved that she was English….

And Luke Evans I knew about him prior to this and vaguely, through watching him in The Hobbit and that god awful movie version of the Three Musketeers (same can be said for Dan, b/c before I watched some of his other stuff I had only know him from Night at the Museum 3)

Anyway…

Luke brought such a great energy to this character and I loved how Gaston started out as an okay dude but slowly dissented into his villainy? The way he portrayed this was astounding b/c as soon as the script called for the change up he handled it with such ease? And wow I just love Gaston so much in this movie.

Josh Gad we gotta talk about FUCKING JOSH GAD I’m not getting into the knitty gritty of things since its not my place to comment on such but I LOVED HIM IN THIS ROLE SO MUCH MORE THAN I LOVED HIM IN FROZEN? He’s so hilarious.  AND HIS LINES WERE A+++

He just brought so much classiness to LeFou and he just made him so likable?  and the fact that HE FOUGHT TO KEEP IN THE SNOWMAN GAG FROM THE ORIGINAL VERSION. I honestly hope they give me all the deleted scenes from this movie.

FUCKING EWAN MCGREGOR AND SIR IAN MCKELLEN AS COGSWORTH AND LUMIERE I just WOW WHAT A GREAT ACTING COMBO (aka all ive ever wanted from the remains of my dull life.)

AND AUDRA MCDONALD AS GARDEROBE AND STANLEY ‘ACTUAL KING OF EVERYTHING HE IS IN’ TUCCI as a sassy piano THAT WAS LITERALLY CREATED FROM SCRATCH FOR HIM? (more on these two later as well because omg they are everything to me and stole my heart??)

AND KEVIN  FUCKING  KLINE omg I loved him so much in this movie just PERFECT honestly.

I’m trying to keep this short so I can move on to my next bunch of thoughts. And not just yap about the casting. (Bullet points listed below, bc I’m getting into the changes) And to begin:

THE SCENARY AND CGI IN THIS MOVIE WERE FUCKING ASTOUNDING? I DIED? IT WAS BEAUTIFUL, say what you want about what the beast looked like. Dan Stevens exhausted himself entirely for 2-3 months just to make the beast into a computer animated caricature. AND I LOVED THE ANIMATION ON THE CASTLE STAFF? I also really loved the backstories for everyone it just filled in so much that I found lacking in the original. Just everything that filled in all the plotholes were A++

  • THE PROLOGUE and it being narrated by the ENCHANTRESS.(Side note: I loved the technicalities and consequences with this new curse)
  • DAN STEVENS GRACING ME WITH HIS FAB TALENT AND NOT SAYING A THING DURING SAID PROLOGUE AND JUST LAUGHING EVILLY AND YET FLAWLESSLY GETTING THE POINT ACROSS THAT THE PRINCE BEFORE MEETING BELLE WAS AN ABSOLUTE PANSY ASS DICK? Also him in the black get up with the black swan make up?? a lookTM
  • THE CLOSE UPS OF GARDEROBE AND CADENZA AND THEIR LITTLE DOGGO FRU FRU BEFORE THE CASTLE IS CHANGED INTO OBJECTS?? THE FACT THAT FRU FRU IS THEIR DOG?  
  •  THAT WHOLE OPENING SEQUENCE IS INTENSE AS HELL
  • Omg when Gaston stepped on Belle’s cabbages THERE WERE LIKE 3-4 KIDS THAT GASPED. It made me smile omg.
  • When Maurice and Phillipe were heading out of town and in the woods heading to the castle. One child was like “aww look at the horsey” I mean…
  • WHEN MAURICE IS IN THE CASTLE AND MEETS CHIP everyone laughed like honestly I was blessed with actually being a a cinema room full of people that laughed and reacted to stuff b/c last week when I went there were crickets, some child mad an off hand comment later on in the movie when Beast invites Belle to dinner and he does the smileTM I kid you not I heard “look his tiny teeth” I love his tiny fangs so much hes just so awkwardly endearing altogether.
  • OKAY OKAY OKAY SO WHEN BELLE HEADS UP TO THE CASTLE TO FIND HER DADDO AND SHES AT THE CELL IM PRETTY SURE THEY PLAY THE SCORE TO EVERMORE? its like lowkey but I NOTICED IT AND IT WAS GLORIOUS.
  • all the songs in this movie and the additional lyrics woven into the film added 30 years to my life.
  • THE WHOLE “GASTON” NUMBER WAS FABULOUS AND EVERYTHING AND MORE ITS BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL VERSION THAT WHOLE MOMENT WHEN THEY BREAK TO CLAP AND STOP ON THE TABLE AND THE FACT THAT THE SCORE FOR THAT BIT SOUNDS LIKE A CAVALRY CHARGE AND THE WHOLE “SAY IT AGAIN” BIT AFTER THE “I USE ANTLERS IN ALL OF MY DECORATING” LINE.
  • BUT LIKE THERE IS MORE BECAUSE OMG THEY GAVE COGSWORTH STUFF TO SING DURING “BE OUR GUEST” INSTEAD OF JUST “SOMETHING THERE”. LIKE THE ONLY OTHER TIME HE SINGS IS IN THE ORIGINAL DURING “HUMAN AGAIN” I love the flawless smooth transition from SIR IAN MCKELLEN belting out the COURSE BY COURSE bit of that verse and Ewan being like ONE BY ONE immediately after? honestly I always fist bump during that moment when I listen to the soundtrack. AND THE WHOLE NUMBER IN THE MOVIE IS JUST SOO GREAT. I love my crotchety old clock and dramatically extra candlestick. the best BROTP.
  • Ok, so the people I sat beside started laughing during little Adam’s part in Days In the Sun and omg I was off hand annoyed because it ruined my chance to start the water works even though I still cried.
  • BEAST TRASHING ON ROMEO AND JULIET WILL FOREVER BE ICONIC to me I LOVE WELL READ BEAST SO MUCH I’m tired of the ‘but I wish he would have stayed illiterate’ statements.
  •  EVERYONE. AND WHEN I SAY EVERYONE I MEAN EVERYONE ERRUPTED INTO LAUGHTER WHEN BEAST HAULED THAT BIG ASS SNOWBALL AT BELLE’S HEAD.
  • ALSO any time Beast gave Belle his little smiles??? they were so pure and cute
  • So seeing this movie a second time the yellow dress discourse is quiet frankly ?? to me I loved it AND I LOVE THE FACT THAT DAN STEVENS MADE THE BEAST UTTERLY DISTRESSED OVER ASKING HER FOR A DANCE IN THE BALLROOM? (THAT WHOLE SEQUENCE IS SO FUCKING GORGEOUS)
  • LIKE…I JUST LOVE HOW MUCH LIFE AND PERSONALITY AND 3 DIMENSIONALISM HE GAVE HIM B/C I WILL BE TALKING ABOUT THIS PORTRAYAL UNTIL IM DEAD AND IN THE GROUND.
  • Which brings me to the make up scene everyone laughed and I almost could not stop laughing at the scene change.
  • Emma Thompson’s version of Beauty and the Beast is so wonderful. I love it.
  • THE FIRST TIME I HEARD EVERMORE IN THE MOVIE I WAS STUNNED INTO SILENCE AND JUST DAN STEVENS AGAIN GRACING ME WITH SUCH RAW EMOTION AND TALENT. SIGH I JUST LOVE THAT WHOLE SEQUENCE, I WOULD HAVE LOVED IT EVEN MORE HAD I BEEN REALLY INTO THE SECOND TIME SEEING IT BUT ALAS THE PERSON BESIDE ME WAS LAUGHING AND I WAS JUST LIKE… RUDE. HONESTLY THOUGH THE PAIR OF PIPES DAN STEVENS HAS HE HAS SUCH A BEAUTFUL RANGE AND WHEN HE SINGS ANGELS DESCEND FROM HEAVEN, AND JUST THIS WHOLE FUCKING SONG GAVE ME THE LAARGEST EARGASM THE FIRST TIME I HEARD IT. LIKE HONESTLY GOD BLESS ALAN MUSICAL GENIEUS KING MENKEN
  • Honestly everyone is at war against whether Josh or Dan’s version is better and I just prefer Dan’s version so much. I found Josh Groban’s version too slow even though he sings like an angel too.  
  • tt.tt  THE MOB SONG and the castle staff going up in arms was always my fave in the 90s version. And it did not disappoint.

Bullet points are done I am heading into paragraph summarizing my thoughts on the last 30-40 minutes. BECAUSE THIS SHIT WAS UNREAL, and HARROWINGLY DARK. AND I LOVED THESE CHANGES FROM THE ORIGINAL.

THE WHOLE CASTLE TURRET CHASE SCENE WAS SO FUCKING GOOD I HAD MULTIPLE HEAR TATTACKSTHE FACT THEY SWITCHED UP THE HUNTING KNIFE AND REPLACED IT WITH A PISTOL that moment when the Beast gets shot oh god.

Like when Belle comes back and sees the Beast and he literally SHOUTS OUT HER NAME I am crying?? and deceased?? and then he gets shot 2 more times honestly this was equally amazing and heartbreakingly brutal.

And let me tell the whole concept of the castle actually breaking apart as the petals fall, that is just such a neat spin and I love it.


So like I said I found the twist with the curse fascinating because in the original the only thing it focused largely on was the Beast, Mrs Potts, Plumette, Lumiere , Cogsworth and FruFru. I LOVE THAT THE MOVIE CEMENTED AND ROUNDED ALL OF THE CASTLE STAFF AND GAVE THEM A LARGER SPOLIGHT THAN IN THE ORIGINAL LIKE THE CASTLE STAFF MAKES UP HALF OF THE CAST/CHARACTERS FOR THIS MOVIE. For the past week and a half people have said why was the inanimate scene so long and drawn out? Because the castle staff are the greatest and the only family the Beast has besides Belle that’s why… the end. Also I ship the hell out of Cadenza & Garderobe, Plumette and Lumiere AND MR AND MRS POTTS OMG.

THE WHOLE INANIMATION SEQUENCE HAD MY ENTIRE SOUL IN SHREADS, IVE ??? NEVER?? CRIED??? SO MUCH IN MY LIFE??? LIKE LUMIERE HOLDING PLUMETTE IN HIS ARMS AND SETTING HER DOWN GENTLY AND MRS POTTS NOT BEING ABLE TO GET TO CHIP AND CHIP ALMOST FUCKING BREAKING BUT THE COATHANGER CATCHING HIM THE LAST SECOND AS HIS SAUCER BREAKS?  CADENZA AND GADEROBE REUNITING AND HER TELLING HIM THAT HE IS BRAVE JUST BEFORE SHE FADES AWAY AND HIM BEGGING HER NOT TO LEAVE HIM?? I MEAN THAT IS THE TEXTBOOK DEFINIITION OF PURE AND UTTER DEVOTION RIGHT THERE FRIENDS.THE SADDEST THING ABOUT THEIR INANIMATION SCENE IS THE FACT THAT THEIR DOGGO FRU FRU BECOMES INANIMATE BETWEEN THEM. COGSWORTH AND LUMIERE SAYING GOODBYE. NEED I SAY MORE.

BUT THEN THE TRANSFORMATION SCENE HAPPENED AND I COULD NOT BREATHE I LOVEED HOW THEY FILMED THIS SCENE AND HOW EMMA AND DAN PLAYED THIS SCENE. NEVER IN MY LIFE WILL I LOVE ANYTHING AS MUCH AS I LOVE THIS SCENE.

Everyone is like “well why didn’t they say anything?”

I LOVED that HE DID NOT NEED TO SAY ‘BELLE, ITS ME?”

this iconic masterly filmed sequence only needed to be filmed with sheer BODY LANGUAGE, VISUAL EXPRESSIONS AND EMOTIONS COMING FROM BOTH DAN AND EMMA AND I JUST AM ASTOUNDED? EVERYTHING THEY FELT COULD BE SEEN BY THE AUDIENCE I FELT THAT SHIT DEEP IN MY SOUL AND IVE ANALYZED EVERYTHING LEADING UP TO THE KISS. FROM THEIR LOOKS OF DAZED WONDERMENT AFTER BEAST TURNS BACK INTO A HUMAN, AND HIS LITTLE HUFF OF RELIEF AFTER HE INTIALLY TURNS AROUND AND FACES EMMA, TO DAN’S HEAVY BREATHING, BELLE PLAYING WITH HIS HAIR AND HIM THREADING HIS FINGERS THROUGH HERS IN TURN? THE FACE TOUCH AS SHE IS LOOKING FOR ANY SIGN THAT THIS IS INFACT THAT GUY SHE LOVES?? (HONEST TO GOD THAT SHOT OF DAN HE IS ALREADY A BEAUTFUL GUY BUT HOLY HELL HE LOOKED SO GOOD IN THIS SCENE) THE CLOSE UP SHOT OF HIS EYES. HER RELIEVED LAUGH AND THE IMMENSE GENTLE CAUTION BETWEEN THEM JUST BEFORE THEY KISS AND THAT GIANT ASS INHALE DAN TAKES AS SOON AS THEY MAKE CONTACT ALSO MENTIONING THE FACT THAT ONCE THEY DO KISS HER HAND MOVES FROM HIS CHEST TO HIS WAIST.

THIS WHOLE SCENE IS LITERALLY THE LIVING EMBODIMENT OF THE PATRICK STEWART ACTING GIF

I LOVE THIS KISS SO MUCH HONESTLY ITS MY FAVOURITE DISNEY KISS.

The best was when they all became human again and reunited and were left with parting gifts from the curse. I laughed out loud when they showed Stanley Tucci with no teeth. 

UGH AND THE LAST SCENE WITH CADENZA BEING SO FUCKING HAPPY AND SMILING AS THE WIFEY IS SINGING again.

EMMA AND AUDRA singing the final number omg the whole coronation dance scene was everything. 

AND JUST THIS WHOLE MOVIE IS FABULOUS AND I NEEDED THE DVD TO BE RELEASED YESTERDAY.

Monsta X when they get jealous:

Anon ask: What are they like when they’re jealous?

Shownu:

Originally posted by hyunqvwon

  • cold
  • a bit distant
  • won’t tell you until you start bugging him about it
  • maybe not even then
  • will tell you what’s wrong with him when you’re about to sleep
  • looks away from you a lot because you keep laughing at him
  • tells you stop hanging around I.M because he’s an evil maknae 
  • and that he always makes these weird faces when you hang out with him
  • blushes because he’s not used to being this open

Wonho:

Originally posted by wearemonbebes

  • gets really petty about it
  • “why don’t you go hang out with ____?!”
  • gives you stink looks for the rest of the day
  • tries to be cute when you make ramen
  • once he’s done eating he goes back to ignoring you
  • gets defensive when you ask if he’s jealous
  • “Me?! Jealous?! Never!”
  • will never admit it because he’s the denial queen
  • literally does this ALL THE TIME
  • “you know you love me” ;3

Kihyun:

Originally posted by jhmx

  • “Well that’s none of my business” -_>
  • kermit sipping tea is basically how he’s acting
  • “Well it’s not like I don’t have girl friends either.”
  • would also ignore you
  • locks himself in his room 
  • overthinks everything when he’s alone
  • stomps out of the room and gets angry at everything
  • eventually letting out why he’s upset
  • feels better after you spoil him 

Minhyuk:

Originally posted by chiqkihyun

  • gets dramatic
  • “Who’s that?”
  • “Where’s he from?”
  • “How long have you two known each other?”
  • acts weirder than normal
  • is also a queen of denial
  • thinks he knows what’s happening between you and this other person
  • “AH HA!! I KNEW I-… wait what?”
  • feels dumb when you explain that the guy was just a friend
  • “Oh… yeah I totally knew that! I was testing to see how you would react if I was CRAZY jealous.”

Hyungwon:

Originally posted by gifsmonstax

  • is basically chillin’
  • doesn’t see a problem with it
  • “You come home to me anyway”
  • lowkey confident AF!
  • “he didn’t trap you first” 
  • “U MAD BRO?” attitude xDDD

Jooheon:

Originally posted by jooheonbebe

  • “Well well well..”
  • interrogates you with an ass ton of questions
  • goes on a rant about how all men except for him are bad
  • and that you need to stay away from them
  • “I don’t like him. Delete his everything from your life”
  • plays the “I’m your oppa” card
  • feels bad about overreacting because you look mad
  • hugs you and explains his feelings
  • tears up a bit so that you don’t yell at him
  • also gets spoiled afterwards

I.M:

Originally posted by hearteyeschangkyun

  • “He’s no competition”
  • lowkey jealous
  • highkey cocky and annoying
  • doesn’t like your friend because he’s taller than him
  • “he doesn’t sit right with me”
  • talks to himself about what would happen if you left him for your friend
  • gives your friend stink eyes every time their eyes meet
  • scares your friend away
  • mostly because he said he would send Shownu on him
  • feels bad but also lowkey triumphant because your friend is out of the picture.

a/n: This is the first time I’ve done anything like this, and I mostly did it because I was lazy. These probably aren’t  even accurate, but they’re kind of funny so that should be good, right?

A Little Mistake Messenger

Ch. 1 Ch. 2 Ch. 3 Ch. 4 Ch. 5 Ch. 6 Ch. 7 Ch. 8  Ch. 9 Ch. 10


Summary:  MC has exciting news to tell Zen and the other RFA members. That is until the MC gets a shock from Zen. MC finds comfort in a close friend, Jumin Han.

Rating: M (language and adult themes)

Tags: Mystic Messenger, Jumin x MC, Zen x MC

Authors Note: I’ve been working on a 707 series while also working at this story as well. So that’s exciting! I hope my Jumin fanatics like myself reallllly enjoy this chapter. I’ve been listening to a Firefly music festival playlist for a lot of inspiration to get my butt in gear. 

I’d love to hear from you guys about what you like or what I can improve upon. Keep liking and sharing to spread the love <3 

Lazy weekends were the best weekends especially after Jumin got home from his business trip. Jumin was napping soundly on the couch Elizabeth the third purring on his chest with his hand on her body. I smiled to myself as I watched the two of them snoozing the afternoons away. I grabbed a blanket and gently laid it across his legs and on lower part of his chest. His top shirt buttons casually unbuttoned. Elizabeth moved in his arms at the startle of the blanket but settled back into her position once she realized I had helped her out.

I sat back down on the lounge chair and scrolled through my phone.

MC has logged into the Chatroom—

Jaehee: I’m relaxing at the beach getting some sun.

707: I burn to a crisp in the sun

Oh MC is here!

MC: Jaehee how is vacation going?

Jaehee: You can keep my job forever if you would like. 

Has Jumin ran you up a wall yet?

MC: hahaha hardly. 

Everything is good on our end, however business end is a different story.

Jaehee: What happened was it his father again?

MC: not quite Mr. Han per say more like Jumin’s fiance.

707: wait hes engaged that damn bastard

MC: no don’t misunderstand this is not his choosing.

Jaehee: and what happened?

MC: they may or may not believe that Jumin and I are-

Jaehee: He did what?

MC: Its just a misunderstanding, until Jumin can collect enough information to refuse this marriage proposal.

707: Oh thank God! 

I was worried that I would have to come save you from Jumins clutches. 

Defender of Justice to save the innocent MC from the gate keeper Jumin.

MC: all good on this end here! 

Seven don’t worry I’ll know who to call to save me next time.

707: All is well then.

Defender.

Of.

Justice.

Out.

-707 has logged out-

Jaehee: I have to go too I need another drink.

MC: Don’t have too much fun you have to come back soon!

Jaehee: No promises here.

–Jaehee has logged out—

 It was inevitable that I would run into Zen news on my Facebook page. South Korean Musical Actor Trending in the United States of America. I quickly scrolled past the news page my friends shared on Facebook. Hyun Ryu and Amelia Corina officially an item? I turned my phone over trying to ignore the burning feeling in my heart. 

I could not tear my eyes away at his calm and collected mannerism. Did he even lose any sleep over me? He looked as if he didn’t spend too much time letting a breakup hinder his acting and public appearance. Hyun was somebody now, and I was just holding him back. It took me a week and RFA taking turns keeping my mind occupied before I was finally composed enough to be alone.

Why was I craving to see him, was it because he was happy and doesn’t seem to be too worried about a cheating scandal? I still cared for Zen. I will always love him in some way or the other. I cant forget the man that he was before things started to go downhill. Still, I can admire him from afar. Maybe one day Jaehee and I can fangirl over him and we can bring the baby to watch Zen on the TV.

There were thousands of pictures mostly of Zen, and selfies on date nights. Late nights under the stars, his motorcycle, backstage at his musicals. Was he happy? Was he finally accomplishing his dreams? Did the woman in the new pictures know how he likes his DVD collection at home? How he snores lightly when he’s exhausted from a long night of drinking?

I looked at my camera roll on my phone hesitant to look at the beginning. If I wanted a clean slate I needed to delete photos off of my phone. It was going to be now or never. I selected every photo, video, selfie, and saved screen shots I had saved since I met him. I quickly hit the delete button before my heavy fingers would change their mind. Clearing out all the memories, and moments that I treasured the most with Zen. I took a deep breath as I emptied my trash bin on my phone.

I felt as if a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I could start looking forward to cute baby pictures. I finally opened my text messages and deleted any and every message with Zen involved in it. It would be better to rid myself of the temptation to look back and feel sorry about myself. I smiled to myself that I was finally released from a large amount of temptation to look at those photos that brought me so much happiness.

I was startled by Elizabeth crawling in my lap. I looked over at Jumin who was lazily stretching out on the couch with a loud groan. I pet her soft white fur as she sat down between my legs encouraging me to pet her.

“Have you decided to sit with the ladies?” I said to Elizabeth who was enjoying extra attention from another person.

She cozied herself up on my knee and sprawling out. “She just wants more attention” Jumin said groggily and I laughed at her cute little face and tail.

“Jumin, Elizabeth the Third needs a womanly figure in her life to keep her straight. Sometimes it’s good to take a short reprieve from her favorite and only man in her life.”

He laughed and sat up on the couch, blanket wrapped around his shoulders and hair disheveled in all directions. I smiled to myself at his rare and slightly appearance. Jumin would hate to look like a mess in front of anyone.

“What are you smiling at?” He asked looking at me seated on the edge of the couch arms resting on his legs.

“Nothing!” I told him scratching behind Elizabeth’s ears averting his stare and blush on my cheeks. I took out my phone and took a quick picture of Elly. I knew who to send this picture to, Seven. Seven immediately responded with heart emojis: “Elly my love! She is so adorable! Jumin however looks like he just woke up with the bad case of bed head.”

“Wait was I in that picture that you just took?” He asked sitting upright on the couch. “Maybe. A lady never divulges her secrets Jumin.” I teased and he smirked. “Can I see it?” He asked softly.
I got up and sat next to him on the couch and showed him the picture.

“God is that what my hair looks like?” He ran a hand through it in an attempt to fix it only making it stick further out. I laughed uncontrollably at his hair and his expression when he asked me if it looked any better. He got up and went to his room. “Can you help me since my efforts have been to no avail.”

“Yes Jumin.” I sat on the top of the couch and had him between my legs. “Let me know if I pull your hair.”

I carefully brushed his hair back towards my body. “Have you ever worn it any other way or has it always looked like this?”

“Its been the same for as long as I can remember.”

“Jumin have you ever been in relationships with other women before?”

“What?”

“I didn’t mean for it to sound like that, I just never have seen you show interest in many women our age. Nothing is wrong with that I was just wondering.”

“Women are out for my fathers money and influence not so much myself. The way to my fathers heart seems to be through winning me over. None of them actually cared for me or was around long enough for one anyways. Most women only see me as money and future CEO.”

“I understand your difficulty then finding someone you can actually trust and talk too aside from V and Rika.”

“Yes it was only them for a while but now that V is absent and Rika passed I only have Elizabeth.”

“You have me too Jumin.”

“I know and I’m thankful for some sanity in the madness.” He sighed deeply. “How does it look?”

“It doesn’t look half bad pulled back.” I said and he got up to look at himself.

“If I didn’t look old before this makes me look much older now.”

“I think you look mature, well you already looked mature. More mature.” I said shuffling down to the couch.

“You think I would scare Jaehee if I wore it like this?” He asked smiling as he ruffled his hair out with a shake of his head and hair returned to its normal position on his head.

“I think she would think something was wrong.” He smiled shaking his head.

“What were you doing earlier on your phone? You looked upset?” He asked concerned tone in his voice.

“Hmm oh I was just deleting photos.”

“Of him?”

“Yes of him.” Silence deafened between the two of us before he spoke again.

“You still love him?”

“I don’t love him now but I think I always will hold a place for him. There is a baby that will probably remind me of Zen every day soon.”

“Is love a strange and powerful emotion?” He asked sitting back down on the couch his arms reclined back on the couch behind him. I looked at his face searching himself for some grasp on his tone and curiosity.

“Love?” How do I describe love?

“Well love is different for everyone,” I tried to explain. “Theres the love you have for your family or your father. The love you have for your friends V, Seven, Yoosung, and Jaehee. Finally there is romantic love that you feel towards another person.”

“I love Elizabeth the Third, is that more a familial love?”

“Yes exactly shes a part of your family.”

“Familial love is similar to when Yoosung and Seven talk about chocolate milk and cat jokes?” I nodded my head smiling. Jumin trying to make mental connections to the emotions he was feeling and putting a name to the emotion and it was written on a furrowed line on his forehead. The wrinkle he gets when he is deep in concentration and deep thought. He was silent again before he spoke up once more. 

“What about romantic love?” His asked softly in my direction. 

I took my time trying to find the right words in which to describe romantic love to him that would make the most sense. Your heart starts racing uncontrollably out of your chest around them. Your face gets red when they say anything remotely similar to flirting.” He nodded his head. “Do you find it hard to eat when you think about them?” he asked genuinely. “I think so depending on the situation.”

He met my eyes in an instant, “I think I know what it is.” His hand rested on top of my hand his eyes locked with mine. His fingers grasping onto the sides of my hand and making small circular motions with his pointer finger. I took a deep intake of air before speaking “Romantic or passionate love for another person I think is when you put the other person before yourself, and you worry not just for your needs but for theirs and in a more intimate way. Physically and mentally.” 

His dark eyes stared into my own and I was memorized at the deep color of them as our eyes locked onto one another. “I think I know what it is,” he said moving closer to me on the couch. My face felt warm under his intense stare. Jumin closed the space that was between his lips within inches of my own. I closed my eyes in anticipation of his warm lips to meet mine. His hand sliding to the back of my head. 

There was a loud knock on the door. I immediately sat back and lowered my eyes to avert his own. He cleared his throat and buttoned his shirt to check the door. 

“Jumi! I came to-“ a loud and shrilling high pitched voice pierced through the air and could only belong to the voice of a red-haired, overly perfumed woman in a purple dress.

“This is not a good time Sarah.” Jumin said and she barged into his home. Sarah threw open the door that Jumin was guarding. He palmed his head in frustration. .

“Oh shes here.” I shifted in my seat making sure my little baby bump was hidden from her watchful eye. Shit. The ultrasound was on his fridge. This could implicate Jumin already more than he already was.

“shes my lover of course she would be here.” Jumin said coming to sit by me leaning on the sofa arm casually.

“I brought something for Liz!”

“Elizabeth the third?” Jumin corrected

“yes the cat,” Sarah snared back at him.

I slowly got up to make my way over to the fridge. “Shall I let you two discuss?”

“No I want you to stay.” Jumin said grabbing my hand from my side. I turned to look at him and his expression pleading for help. His slim fingers intertwined into my own.

“So how did you two officially meet?”Sarah asked trying to latch herself onto Jumin. Her breasts spilling out of her top as she attempted to press herself to his arm. Jumin immediately shook her off in disgust and need for personal space. I gave him some space as he tried to push her off of him. 

“Well-“ I started when Jumin chimed in. 

“She is the coordinator for RFA parties for a while, and-“

“I have no interest in Jumin’s businesses, he’s a genuinely kind man with a huge heart.” I added as i looked at Sarah who looked like she bit into something sour and bitter. 

 “Romantic love will never last.”

Her comment struck a nerve deep within me. 

“I know that, more than anyone.” She started going through my papers i had laying on the dining room table. I stepped in front of her putting the papers back to their location.

“You have a limited amount of time with the people you love than you spend that time doing just that.”

“I have a right to see what those documents are since I am his fiance.”

“No you don’t. and No you are not. You can leave the gift for Elizabeth on the table and then escort yourself out.” I was fuming with annoyance. Jumin was smirking behind me at how little patience I had for this woman.

“Jumin are you going to let her speak to me in such ways? I know you are faking this relationship with your secretary. Wont you let me comfort you?”

“I find no issue with her tone.Is that so? We are faking it?” He said questionably at her comment. His arms folded against his chest in annoyance.

“MC.” Jumin said grabbing my arm and pulling myself towards him closely. He felt like he was on fire from the heat he was exuding.

“I want to be honest with my feelings for you. I had intentions on letting our relationship grow however I ant deny that there is a strong attraction to you. I cannot hold myself back any longer.”

“Jumin-“

I felt his hand on my chin and he pressed his lips firmly against mine. My mind went blank at his tender kiss. I wanted more. I needed more. But I also needed to breathe before I was consumed in his heat. I looked into Jumins eyes that were tenderly looking into my own. I don’t know how long we stood there just looking at each other. 

“You would kiss her in front of your own fiance!” Sarah screamed and loudly screaming at us both. Sarah must have let herself out on her own because I was too busy letting Jumin consume me with his tender kisses. Jumins hand placed behind my head. My hands holding tightly onto his shirt. I let my guard down and allowed myself to initiate the kiss again and pressed myself into his warm and soft lips. His tongue tracing around my lip as if asking for permission from my lips to enter.

He was the first to pull away his head resting on mine. “I have been wanting to kiss you for a long time now.” He smiled kissing my head as if I were a child. 

“Did you mean what you said earlier?”

“All of it.” He just held me tightly against his chest. 

“I have never felt this much before I met you.” He whispered into my ear and I smiled knowing that he was becoming more open with himself and allowing himself to feel. He pressed his lips against mine as if he was trying to consume the air in my lungs. My lips brushing against his over and over again.

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Bad things (min yoongi x reader)

Originally posted by yoosungsmyyandere

Warning: cursing, slight smut but still smut

Summary:This is based on the bad things music video/song which was amazing and if you haven’t heard it you should listen to it. cause its pretty cool.

People always asked me why I chose this life. Why did I leave my home town. why I left my life behind to run away with some boy. Its complicated really, only I can understand it. Its like I want to be suffocated in his love and I would do anything for him.

So that’s what  I did we left the town that once sucked us dry, in search for a cure for our tedious lives and find something to strive for. We didn’t live the luxurious life we were hoping to find, jumping from couch to couch from street bench to another before we found an abandoned warehouse. We stole a few things and robbed a few convenient stores, running from the cops while our veins filled with euphoria.

We ran into a few friends on the way some stayed others didn’t make it. Now here we were carelessly laughing in the kitchen while I attempted to make eggs.

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Little Beasts and Where to Hide Them

Summary:  You may or may not be hiding something from your boyfriend.  Takes place between Day 11 and the After Ending.

Pairing:  Zen x MC/Reader

Genre:  Slice of Life; Fluff

Rating:  G

Word Count:  Approx. 1900


It was a lazy Saturday night.  Zen had been hard at work for over a month, leaving early in the morning and returning well into the night.  Your boyfriend’s career had definitely been picking up; for the past several weeks, he had been juggling film sessions with a new TV drama series, as well as doing a lot of commercials.  The downside was that you hadn’t seen much of him, lately, other than a goodbye kiss in the morning and maybe a midnight snack once he got home, although you called and texted each other often.  You were happy for him, of course, but he knew that you missed him.

So, tonight was going to be all about the two of you.  He finally had an evening off, and he was determined to spend it with you.  You had just eaten a lovely dinner, together, cooked by you but with prep help from Zen.  Now, you two were cuddling on the couch, rubbing noses and being generally affectionate.  It was a beautiful evening.

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En Garde

Another deleted scene style fic, around the time of 6x09. Emma hasn’t told her family about her visions yet, and decides that fencing lessons from Killian might improve her chances of defeating Gideon.  I’ve written Killian teaching Emma to fence before, fluffily, but it seemed a good time to update the headcanon with the added angst of those visions!  

Read on FF!


There was no time for a moving day; not when every day brought a new disaster, a new story no one was sure if they wanted to see the end of. A single chest of Killian’s belongings moved in the first day, set carefully next to a box in her closet, waiting for a quiet moment to be shared. His jackets mingled with hers in the closet, his boots sat neatly underneath the hung leathers and books and papers were gradually filling the empty spaces of their house. Sometimes Killian mentioned something that he would need to get from his ship and within a couple hours it would appear on the kitchen table. He suspected she was testing her magic on his belongings when he was not looking, but it saved him a trip and hopefully calmed her frayed nerves, so he simply thanked her with a kiss on the cheek and filed another hole in a still too empty home.

Two battered sticks joined her boots next to the door, growing more banged up each day as Killian and Henry sparred in the front yard in their spare moments. It warmed her heart to see them spending time together, but from time to time the sight filled her with sudden dread as wooden practice swords were replaced in her mind by sharp steel and unresponsive magic. She fought for her life without a sound, clasping her hand tight to hide her battle from her family no more than a few paces away.

Henry hugged her tight when her eyes were distant and Killian pressed her shaking hand to his lips with questioning eyes. She caught them glancing at each other sometimes, when she told them again that she was fine. They had finally stopped asking with their lips, perhaps hoping she would tell them eventually on her own, but their eyes ever begged her for an explanation that was not forthcoming. She refused to give voice to the whole story, refused to interrupt the happy illusion she had built for herself.

The stick flew from Henry’s hand once more and Killian laughed, leaning his own against the steps. “You’re doing better, lad. But I’ve the reach of my arm and a couple hundred years training head start.”

“Aren’t you supposed to let me win sometimes?” Henry grumbled halfheartedly, diving to retrieve his ‘weapon.’

“Never!” Killian insisted. “One of these days you will disarm me. And you will know for certain that it will not be because I let you do so. Now off with you, lad, your mother will end me if you’re late for school again.” Henry tossed his stick to Killian who caught it as the boy bolted for the bus, grumbling about how between two magical moms, shouldn’t he just appear at school?

Killian laughed and gave Henry’s pole a practice swing or two as he turned back towards the house, to his surprise he was met with the sudden appearance of a pole aiming for his head. He ducked by impulse, his arm moving before he’d the chance to identify the person on the other end of the attack. Emma grinned at him, blocking his swing with the stick he’d put down a moment ago.

“My turn, pirate. Someone ought to bring you down a peg or two!”

Killian smirked, breaking away and moving to circle her. “You think so? You may have the advantage with firearms and fireworks but swordplay… Swordplay is my strength, love.”

“You underestimated me the last time we dueled. Haven’t you learned your lesson?”

“I did. But that is not why you won.”

“Why did I win, then?” Emma retorted. She grew tired of waiting for Killian to make the first move and dove forward, seeking an opening that was gone as soon as she moved. Suddenly she was on the defense, pressed backwards step by step until her boot smacked against the bottom of their steps. She wavered for a moment and then fell backwards, only saved from a bruised backside by Killian’s hook, which had suddenly slipped through her belt loop and tugged her upright again.

“You won because I did not wish to see you die on that lakebed, my dear.”

“Okay… maybe I could use a few pointers,” she admitted.

“Why the sudden interest in fencing, love?”

“It couldn’t hurt to be prepared, right?”

“And you think a few tricks with a blade will make you better prepared?” He reached for her hand, which had begun to tremble.

His eyes were questioning her again and she forced a smile. “I mean why not? Things are crazy, and it doesn’t look like they’re gonna let up anytime soon And it’s an excuse to spend some time together, just the two of us. Wouldn’t you like that?”

“Of course, Emma. Perhaps once all this madness with the untold stories is ov- ”

“Not after. Now.”

“Now?” Her eyes were blazing with determination and he tilted his head to one side, studying her intently,

“Right now!” She held out her hand to him and he took it without question. Their house vanished and the smell of salt brought a smile to his lips. When his vision cleared they were on the deck of the Jolly Roger.

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BTS Reaction~~

“BTS reactions: To an ex-girlfriend leaking pictures of their gf.(new)“

I was unsure on EXACTLY what you meant, so i hope this if okay>

Im kind of making this as a bad breakup with the EX because i dont imagine the boys being mean unless the girl was first…im sorry if this isnt what you want.

Jin(Seokjin)~

Originally posted by myloveseokjin

He would “accidentally” send a picture of her in a cute sundress. And be like “IM SOOOO SORRY. Did i send that to you, im sorry i meant to send that to everyone but you..” And then he would periodically send a selfie of them two to her and eventually she would demand he delete her number from his phone. He would be a little bitch xD. He would be so sassy to her, and making up excuses to why he keeps sending photos of him and his new girl

Suga(Yoongi)~

Originally posted by bangtannoonas

He would DM her a photo of his new girl wearing his flannel with a message like..”waaaaah look how much better she looks” and then she would blow up hs phone. He would read the messages with his new girl just in awe how much she wasn’t over him. He wouldn’t bother much, because its too much effort to fuck with her LOL. #lazyyoons

J-Hope(Hoseok)~

Originally posted by vexedmikxyla

J-hope would TOTALLY take his new girl to meet her. Straight up, he would go to her and be like…i wanted you to meet her. And he would be overly cute to her in front of his ex. Then he would send her pictures on their anniversary, he would never talk to her, unless it was about his new girl. It would drive his ex mad, and he would soak it up. He would never even say hi, just a text with a photo of them two “OHMO look at how cute we are. we were never that cute OHMOO” is something he would say


Rap Monster(Namjoon)~

Originally posted by namjoonsgurl

He wouldn’t really leak any photos…what he would do is take his new girl to where she works (say like a restaurant) and he would be OVERLY cute to her since his ex has to serve them. He then would introduce his new girl to his ex, and be BLUNT AF and kill his ex. He would then leave no tip and leave with his new girl laughing

Jimin~

Originally posted by jimiyoong

He would take a photo of them two looking at each other with bedroom eyes and send it to her blatantly. He would then proceed to send her constant photos, when she then changes her number, he would then blow up her instagram. He would be so spiteful and cold…he would even ask to double date with his ex but he knows she doesn’t have a boyfriend. He would “accidentally” drop by her house with his new girl for all his old stuff..

V(Taehyung)~

Originally posted by cutae-hyungie

He would be genuine, he would send her photos of his new girl and be like isn’t she pretty? He would talk to her about his new girl, and ask her for advice..he wouldn’t be good at the EX thing. Which would be bad because she would still love him, and his new girl would get jealous and he would be so freaking clueless as to why this was happening. He would just freak out and try to make it better but being the clueless tae..it wouldn’t work

Jungkook~

Originally posted by roselstra

Jungkook would secretly date his new girl, while talking to his ex. He would obviously let his new girl know cause he wanted to fuck with his ex. He would flirt with her, but not too much as he felt bad. He would then one day stop talking to his ex, and she would get worried and stop his place. Then he would come out “looking like he was having sex” and his new girl came out with him. He would love to see the face of his ex all sad and shit xD. I IMAGINE HIM BEING THE GUY YOU DONT WANT TO BREAK UP WITH ROUGHLY CAUSE IT WILL COME BACK TENFOLD XD

Author Spotlight: DamnPene day 2

Day 2: Recs!

Please recommend 3 - 5 of your own fic.

Okay. On it. Tricky to know what to rec. Turns out it’s two reunion fics, a future fic, and a neighbours AU. Enjoy!!

Long Way Home

This is a 34k reunion fic. It started as my answer to the proposal episode. I loved the proposal for all its unlikely, ridiculous beauty but I wanted to work out how I would write the reunion if I faced where they were as individuals, faced the break up and their issues but with the full knowledge that they were in love. The story takes Kurt and Blaine to NYADA but still separated. The fact that all their friends overlap means they need to spend time together and be mature and sensible and not pine for one another or remember all the ways they fit or be cast in a play together.

The story is a happily ever after romance but it’s achey. Finn is a huge part of why it’s sad.

I love it because I love the pining, the work they do on themselves and their relationship, the many ways they reconnect. I think it’s my favourite

Here’s a piece from very early in the story, before the story actually. Drunk Kurt texting sad Blaine.

***

This is Kurt i rembemered your number I deleted it but I still remembered is that weird?

Rachel says hi She also says you can never be friends with someone you were once in love with

Blaine reads “were” and “once” there next to one another like that. “Were once in love with”. He inhales around the lump in his throat. He types carefully.

I’m happy you remembered. Let’s prove Rachel wrong.

There’s a long pause. Then.

Okay Thank you Blaine. And sorry,. drunk texting your ex after a wedding is not a great habit.

You don’t need to apologize. Just make sure you drink lots of water.

So now they’re building a friendship. Blaine’s always been good at friendship. Since that conversation they’ve spoken once or twice a week, just catching up with one another’s everyday lives. They talk about school and classes and song selections. They talk about Kurt’s dad and Cooper and glee club. Kurt sometimes mentions Adam.

It’s fun and it’s light and it’s never, ever enough. When they hang up Blaine is already waiting for the next time they speak. Sometimes he feels like he’s measuring time by Kurt’s phone calls.

Every Word

Every Word is a 21k reunion fic. This is that very first story I wrote when I was first faced with Kurt and Blaine’s heartbreak. Because I didn’t have enough background and was sort of miserable myself I had to give Kurt and Blaine a few years space from one another so the break up wouldn’t hurt so much and I could have them face their issues with a bit of distance. It made it possible to be a bit lighter.

The story is set in San Francisco and largely behind the scenes as the boys build a musical together and reconnect while they do so.  

I love the musical they create together, love their chemistry and respect for one another and the ways they have grown. I love the backstage and the theater family and all that. It was a joy to write and was made even better many months later when friends I made through it were kind enough to add comments.

This section is right near the beginning.

**

Blaine has written the best thing of his career. Of course, he’s only twenty-four and this is really the third thing he’s completed so there’s not much competition. Still, he’s proud of it. He has some limited financial backing; he has a producer in Wes and a director in Devi. He even has a choreographer and a copyright attorney. Everything is set for success. Or ripe for failure.

And now they’re casting the pivotal role. Blaine sighs wretchedly and drops his head into his arms. He’s pretty sure he knows where this is all heading. He lifts his eyes to look at the others. “I might know the right guy,” he says.

Devi shoots a look at Wes. He nods slowly. “Okay. We’ve got some wiggle room here. A tiny little bit of wiggle room, Blaine.”

“Work your charms, Anderson. He’d better be good,” says Devi.

“He is,” says Blaine.

“Oh ho,” she laughs.

Blaine doesn’t bother to tell her it’s not like that.

This show is Blaine’s baby. The madness is that the only person he can picture in the lead role is a boy he has been failing to forget for six years.

**

Wherever You Are

This is an 11k fic set with future married Klaine. They’re still young and in the theater and they’re struggling a little but heading on much-needed vacation. I set out to write a nice little travelogue where Kurt and Blaine go to Australia and see beautiful things. I wanted to write something fun. But instead the boys kept complicating everything, kept making me work for the story as they worked through their relationship, building and rebuilding and rebuilding their life together.

I’m quite protective of this story, it was hard for me to post because I was unsure of it. But it’s connected beautifully for people.

Again this section is near the beginning.


So now Blaine is standing on the airport curb. With all of their luggage.

He’s still furious. He’s still tired. But the truth is he’s packed three kinds of sensitive skin sunscreen, he’s found the adapter and the right hairdryer. And all he wants to do is call Kurt and say, “Please come. Please come with me.” But it’s too late. Kurt will never make the flight if he’s still at the theater or worse, out with the cast, or heading home with someone.

Blaine looks at the suitcases. There are too many for just one person. He’ll need a trolley. A town car pulls up. And Kurt steps out.

His lips are pressed together and his eyes wide and wary. He’s so beautiful it catches in Blaine’s chest. The world could have stopped. He can’t see anything else.

“Hi,” Kurt says, softly.

“Hi,” and Blaine can’t help but smile. He’s angry and weary and it’s not like things are okay but he knew years ago that he was never going to be anything but happy to see Kurt.

**

Five Ways to Survive a BreakUp

Okay so those are all serious pieces which take a little commitment. So here’s something lighter and shorter that I surprised myself by writing. It’s 7k of Klaine as neighbours to lovers with sides of Mercedes and Tina and Rachel and glimpses of the boys Kurt and Blaine are dating as they realise the best thing is right next door.

From early in the piece:

“Okay. I’ll leave you to it then. But- if you need company, my roommates and I are right across the hall.”

“Thank you,” says Blaine. Kurt is very kind. And handsome. “And I really am sorry about the music.”

“It’s fine,” says Kurt. “I completely understand. Sometimes music is the only constant in the world.” He stops in the doorway. He’s lit from the hall and his clothes fit perfectly. “You have an incredible voice, Blaine. And you’re um- very handsome. Any guy would be lucky to have you.” He flushes and his face tightens. “I just thought you should know that, given the day you’ve had.”

Blaine feels an unexpected lightness. “Thank you,” he says.

As the door closes behind Kurt, Blaine wipes his eyes once more. He’s still heartbroken. That kind of thing doesn’t just go away. But there’s a buzz under his skin and a glimmer of hope caught up amongst it.


THANKS!!! 

Selfless

Request:

Hi :-) So can i have a Daryl x reader where they are friends since before the apocalypse and they have feelings for each others but are too shy to say it ? And Daryl is jealous because she is getting closer of Shane and one day while looking for Sophia they argue and admit their feelings ? ( With smut if you want ) Thank you a lot I love your imagines !

A/N: ugh I wrote this and originally it fit the request really good but I accidentally deleted it. I about shot myself and I veered a little off in attempt to actually write it. I hope you like it anyways! (No smut but sometime in one of the upcoming ones) KM SO SORRY ITS LATE I PROMISE ILL WROTE THE OTHERS SOON

Song: bad_news by Bastille

-

“What the hell is your deal?” You asked Daryl harshly.

He scoffed and turned to you with piercing eyes. “Go back to Shane! Yer bangin’ him anyway!”

“You know just as well as I do that that isn’t true! What the fuck is your damn problem?” You were fuming at your best friend who was being completely unreasonable. He got close to you and spoke in your face, putting up his dominant front.

“Do I? I ain’t dealin’ with yer shit no more! You were my problem but not anymore!” He turned away from you and started to walk off when you spoke, so quiet he could barely hear it.

“What-what does that mean..?”

“Exactly what it sounds like.” And with that, he left you outside of your tent with your thoughts to go to the city and find his brother. You were aware of a tightening feeing creeping up in your throat and blurriness finding its way in front of your eyes.

You knew that he didn’t mean anything he just said to you and he’d come running back and saying sorry when he got back but that didn’t mean the words didn’t hurt.

Daryl met you in a restaurant, managing to rescue you from a perverted customer. You instantly attached to him and became extremely close and somewhere along the way, you fell in love. It was him who was at your door at 2 AM when screams and sounds of destruction were closing in. He held his crossbow and shoved a gun into your hand and dragged you to his bike and headed for the mountains along with his older brother. Daryl was protective and rough around the edges but you cherished every part of him, knowing he was the only thing you had left. You always thought the feelings were unreciprocated, one way.

Shane had just asked you for help and often confined in you about Lori after Rick showed up. You were always willing to listen, wanting to help everyone. You always give your food to the kids if they were still hungry or took a double watch if someone was tired. In all honesty, you didn’t dub your behavior as unusual; your father raised you to be selfless and giving, something he always was. Daryl hated Shane, more so after he put him in a headlock, giving him a severe headache the day after.

You couldn’t believe what Daryl said. Accusing you of sleeping with someone was absurd. You had boyfriends before Daryl came around but they were all jerks and cheaters, leaving you single for the better part of your college life.

You shook your head, trying to get what he said out of your thoughts as the sounds of an engine roared to life. The heavy weight of worry made its home deep in your heart, sinking to the bottom like a stone. Walkers crawled the big city streets and just the mere thought of the man you loved stepping a foot close to it created a wave of anxiety, images of his bloody body appearing in your mind. It wouldn’t be the first time he came home drenched in blood.

Sure, you were mad at him for saying what he did, but you forgave so easily especially when he comes to you with guilt glistening in his blue eyes. He was so insecure, always doubting himself, causing him to lash out and voice what he thinks others believe. He always apologized and ended up beating himself up about it; you just came to terms with the fact that he was like that because of his past. Daryl was always on the defense, protecting himself from things that weren’t meant to harm him. You were the first to see the scars on his back, not even his brother had seen them.

You could remember him yelling at you then storming out, leaving you in tears because it was the first time he’d ever done that. Hours later, tear stains along with smudged makeup painted your pillowcase when he returned. As soon as he saw your puffy eyes and trembling body beneath the covers, self loathing claimed his mind, you could see it. Daryl turned around and took his shirt over his head to show you why he was the way he was. You cried while he held you and vice versa. You were devastated to find out the truth but grateful he trusted you enough. That was the day you first started realizing how deep in you really were.

-

The campfire warmed your skin and brought smiles to the faces of those around it. It was Amy’s birthday, everyone telling stories and just enjoying the moment absent from terror. Carl and Sophia were beside you as they both reminded you of your long gone siblings.

Amy got up to leave, everyone’s eyes shooting to her. “I have to pee. Jeez, you try to be discreet around here.” The group chuckled, even bringing you out of your paranoid haze you’d been trapped in ever since you started to overthink. Daryl being hurt flashed before your eyes, him being bit, a walker. You couldn’t stay calm.

A scream pierced the air. Then another. Then everyone was screaming.

Amy was outside of the trailer, a walker biting into her neck. Her sister jumped up and ran to her bleeding body. While this was occurring, walkers appeared from the forest, biting people as they went. Screams rattled the night as well as gunshots.

You jumped up and pulled your gun from your back pocket, now in defense mode. You pushed the children behind you and took down every walker that got near you.

In the chaos, you managed to see Carl darting to his mother, catching the attention of a few walkers.

“Shit!” You yelled, pulling Sophia by the arm to the trailer. You shoved her inside and gave her a spare knife. She looked at you with fear heavy in her eyes and sobs coming from her mouth. “If anything tries to get you, use this!” You slammed the door shut and ran to the other child. He was still running from the walkers and despite how much you screamed for their attention, they were not giving up.

An idea sparked through your head, though you weren’t thinking of the consequences due to the adrenaline pumping in your blood. You grabbed your main knife from your belt and slid it across your forearm, hoping the smell would attract the undead.

You screamed at them once again and they veered their attention from Carl to you. He ran to his mother and she was yelling something at you but your ears were filled with the sound of your rapid heartbeat. Again, you decided to do something potentially stupid and ran to the middle of everything where adults were fighting and others were being bitten.

The knife once again slid over your arm, more crimson running down your fingertips. Walkers that weren’t occupied with feeding on the bitten were now after you.

You sprinted quickly to the woods, hoping to draw them away from the attacked campsite. Groans could be heard from behind you, getting closer and closer by the second. Your strength was running out; the cuts still spilling blood weren’t exactly shallow and it made your head spin.

Eventually you reached a point where you couldn’t run anymore. So you turned toward the fifteen or so walkers in front of you and raised your gun, shooting the ones closest to you until the ammo ran out.

Your knife was the only thing left. You stabbed one after the other, careful to dodge those lunging after you.

While you were pulling the knife out of one, another jumped on you, pushing you to the ground. You struggled against it, thinking of what Daryl taught you.

You held it back with all your strength as it tried to snap its teeth into your face. Just as it was about to sink into your flesh, it fell limp. An arrow was in its skull.

Gunshots rang beside you and you didn’t bother getting up, knowing your dwindling adrenaline wouldn’t aid you in the process. The body was lifted from you and you were met with blue eyes just as you closed yours.

-

As Daryl pulled in, walkers were eating people and attacking the living. Gunshots rang out and echoed into the night, drawing more and more of the dead to them.

He jumped from the car as well as the other men, bringing his crossbow up and taking out the closest to him. He takes them down one after the other, making his way towards the middle of the chaos.

“Daryl!” His head whipped to the voice. It was Lori who was behind Shane along with her son.

“It’s (Y/N)! She’s in the woods and a bunch of walkers followed her!” She was yelling overtop of the loud sounds of death and destruction but Daryl heard every single word.

He took off sprinting into the trees, searching frantically for you, the only one he cared about. He finally saw a crowd of walkers. You were in the middle fighting them off, blood covering you. A walker fell onto you and was trying to bite you and as soon as he was close enough, he took it out. Daryl quickly killed the other ones by means of stabbing and shooting, going over to you after they all fell.

You were covered in blood and your eyes were glazed over before your eyelids covered them. He picked you up and ran back to the camp where the gunshots ceased.

-

“What happened to her?” Daryl asked while you were unconscious in your tent. He had bandaged your arms while muttering apologies for everything he said even though you couldn’t hear him.

“She saved Carl,” Lori said, emotion thick in her voice. “Walkers were chasing him and she– she cut herself to drawl them away. Then she did it again in the middle of everything to get them away from all of us.” Tears were running down her face as she recalled the traumatic events only an hour prior to the current conversation.

He cursed under his breath. How could he have not guessed? You were naturally like that and he knew it.

Rick came over to him and put a hand on Daryl’s shoulder. “(Y/N)’s a brave girl. I owe her, we all do.”

-

A pounding in your skull woke you up. Opening your eyes almost made it worse.

You were in your tent, night still in the air. You sat up, almost falling back down because of the dizziness flooding your vision. Bandages were wrapped around your left arm, blood soaking through them.

Then, the zipper on the tent was undone as Daryl unzipped it. He was covered in blood, mirroring you, and looked exhausted.

“Daryl,” you breathed out. He came inside and closed the tent back up before pulling you into a tight embrace. He burrowed his face into your neck and breathed in. Tears found their way to your cheeks.

“Don’ do that again. Stop bein’ so damn selfless,” he threatened, half growling. He pulled away and took your arm. His thumb brushed over the bandages and he looked you in the eyes with a hard stare. “I can’ lose ya.”

You put your hand on his cheek and he leaned into the gentle touch, an unusual thing for him. Tears kept their steady flow down your face. You were happy but a larger part of you was devastated at the loss of everyone.

Daryl could see exactly what you were thinking. He always did. “C'mere.”

He took you into his embrace, just holding you and whispering into your ear. “I need ya…. I- I…”

“I love you too, Daryl.” You whispered back, knowing what he was trying to say. He squeezed you lightly and held you for the rest of the night, protecting you from the terrors outside.

Every Single Rupauls Drag Race Queen Ranked from 1 to 100 by David Mason
You will notice as thece list goes it runs from HARSH to KIND being that we go from people who are wasting our time and perhaps not living an honest fantasy but trying to be something they FEEL they’re SUPPOSED to be and talented artists who capture us as they reveal beautifully honest selves which bloom from their unconscious.
The Top 25 are ICONIC GOLD and are identities who hold their own amongst all the queens. They are APEX PREDATORS and each could arguably be made number one depending on each persons values. This is MY list and therefore it reflects my values and needs.
100. Phi Phi O’Hara Shes actually the worst for being a horrible person who cant figure out why shes terrible and thats the worst part. I actually BOOED her in public when I saw her. Is it wrong to not like someone just because they were born??? I think it probably is BUT I dont like Phi-Phi because when they showed her mom her mom was like 26 and I just thought YUCK, unplanned pregnancy is just TACKY and I wouldnt have to deal with you if your mom just had the balls to own her own body and be responsible and kind to the Earth and abort you but apparently the apple doesnt fall far from the (say this in Goldie Hawn from Overboard voice) “short, fat, slut" and you come from a long line of short selfish inconsiderate people. Phi-phi is the best case as to why Planned Parenthood should be next to every McDonalds.
99. Kenya Michaels : Oh god Im disturbed by her. She was like that little doll from Trilogy of terror. I found her strong sexual identity so uncomfortable as it was just too obviously a defense mechanism from being a tiny rapeable person from a third world territory. Thats AWFUL to say but Im sorry its just what I saw. I didnt find it funny or sexy. I found it awful and cringy. Its NOT a reason to not like a person but it is a reason as to why I dont want to see her on my tv bending over and WAGGING HER TWAT at me. I dont want to celebrate her complex attempt at molestation management, Im sorry. Lets hope this is me just projecting. I know this is too much for the SECOND entry but Im just saying what I felt. I wish shed read a book instead of just GOING WITH THE SEX THING.
98. Kandy Ho: What gross name, what a skank not even a good skank like Samantha Fox, just a shitty skank.
97. Phoenix: Who? I really have to speed through this list I have to go to the gym.
96. Madame LaQueer: Id put her at 99 but I feel bad for her. Im a nice person.
95. Alisa Summers: i have no idea who this person is
94. Penny Tration: Oh fuck you for that stupid name. Get the fuck outta here.
93.Vivienne Pinay: Why did she think she was pretty or passable or fishy or WHAT? All I saw was “Hi, Can I get the lunch special? I’ll have tai Iced tea with Rad Prik Chicken and coconut soup. Thank you.”
92. Venus D-Lite: Venus is who I think of when I think of queens that dont matter. I didnt even say that to be mean. She just is.
91. Jaidynn Diore Fierce: ??? oh she was the one I think should be named PEANUT.
90. Naysha Lopez: What plane of consciousness thought this person needed to be seen?
89. Sasha Belle: Awkward entry! Rip off Mugler Chimera dress. HERES A TIP PEOPLE, dont try and copy the most amazing well made dress in the world that cost 300k to make and 900 years of 900 year old Parisian couturiers to make. I PROMISE YOUR VERSION WONT BE AS GOOD. If youre going to copy something also make sure said reference has a TEENSY bit of wiggly room for either styling OR improvement. The Mugler Chimeira dress does NOT. Stop looking at it, you cant have it.
88. Akashia: Maybe the first person to fall on the runway??? I dont know? I dont remember her exactly
87. Rebecca Glasscock: I went shopping with Ru once at Saks and a sales girl came up and said “Rebecca works here now!” Ru went from Cafe au lait to FISHBELLY faster than she could mutter… “Rebecca is here?…….now?” thank god the girl was like “Not today”… Cocoa pallor regenerated, shopping recommenced. Rebecca must have been INSANE.
86. Honey Mahogany: Who and Why and whatever….
85. Derrick Barry: Nope.
84. Robbie Turner: I wish you were Tina Turner
83.Cynthia Lee Fontaine:The cowboy look was like a THANKSGIVING revelation that GRANPA IS A CROSS DRESSER?!?!
82. Darienne Lake: Dip into the cool water of Darienne Lake was the best thing about her and that was Rus doing so.. BYE and shes from like Rochester or some shit. YUCK mid/western New York is SKANK.
81. Ginger Minj: Just everything I don’t appreciate.
80. BeBe Zahara Benet: She won season one and I think the prize was 10k and it shoulda gone to Nina.
79. Bob the Drag Queen: After the extraordinarily beautiful Violet won. The audience of sheep were put off by their inability to relate to her because they just arent as good as her so the next season they wrote the season about having a “peoples princess” win and that why we have SHITTY BOB the person who shouldnt have ever been invited. Whats WORSE and MORE ANNOYING is the LATENT worship of Violet after they realized JUST HOW GOOD SHE WAS ONCE THEY SAW BOB and Im sitting here with my fists clenched screaming YOU IDIOTS THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT?!?!?! Bobs season was the worst.
78. Delta Work: Shes the drag queens drag queen. Shes too bitter for tv though. Same reason as to why Jackie Beat isnt on tv, too sour for tv, but thats ok. There is certainly somethig to have the cache of being the type of queen you have to go out to see. When she botched the comedy challenge I felt for her. I could really relate. She has the comic ability and you could just hear the inner dialogue of self sabotage running in her mind. It sucked. Thats one of my challenges too.
77. Thorgy Thor: Funny smart queen that I like. Tv isnt a format that suits her.
76. Sahara Davenport : A sweet soul.
75. Yara Sofia: Ick… The best example of LEARN TO EDIT. Her styling is THE GOOP SHOW. You know how some people just have BAD VIBES? I just dont want her around me. I dont see her vibes swirling in a direction I wanna head towards. I kinda hate dreads, Id lie and not say it to sound cool but there just unsavory to me. Patchouli.. thats what I smell when I see them in my minds eye.They just make me ask.. Why do you deliberately choose to be kinda not so clean? Its some romantic notion I don’t prescribe too. Im not earthy in that way. Im Earthy in a watermelons are fierce kinda way.
74. Kelly Mantle: This person is not Christine Baranski! Why are you telling me youre related to a baseball player like Im supposed to care?
73. Magnolia Crawford: ahahahahahahahahahah… that poor homosexual. He MIGHT be more disliked than phi-phi. THAT NOSE gets points.. it HAD to be a critique on nose contour right?! Does anyone ACTUALLY know her?! I feel like this might be some weird dare that a straight guy did and made it on the show. It was all so WEIRD?!
72. Jade. I really dont remember a damn thing but kinda thought she was a nice person maybe??? errr ummmm I just shrugged my shoulders to myself.
71. Lanaysha Sparks: She was quite lovely and even surprisingly talented on the craft contest but not knowing who Diana Ross is and your a drag queen is SATANISM. Poor bitch is from Puerto Rico, do you now Puerto Rico is twice as poor as the poorest state? That sucks.
70.Laila McQueen: Is this an OSBORNE CHILD?? Had she been on previous seasons she would have faired better. Seemed like a kid Id hire as an intern and could trust.
69. Serena ChaCha Oh my god Serena snook right by me?!?! AHAHAHAHAH Serena! Worst look of ALL TIME. how was SHE an art school student?! I cringed when she said that as Im an art school kiid and was like NO NO NOPE TAKE IT BACK CLOSE YOUR MOUTH! Serena was the victim of QUEEN ON QUEEN GANG BULLYING and what was worse is AMERICA BACKED THE GANG RAPE. It was like that scene in The Dark Crystal when the Skeksi looses the sword challenge and they all tear the clothes of him and banish him! Alyssa WENT IN on her….Coco even got a piece of Serena that day! Serena is lucky to be alive.
68. Jasmine Masters: Im disturbed by my own ability to impersonate Jasmine Masters. Its not THAT GOOD but its better than a 225lb Pollock should be able to do. Her Slinky worm routine makes me GIGGLE. She is ANGRY……BLACK RAGE which I kinda appreciate in a way. I get it. I have gay rage so why cant she have BLACK RAGE?!
67. Tempest DuJour awww tempest.. We all like Tempest. Kinda funny shes a costume design teacher though no? She gave my husband a shirt and my husband wore it for her all day in Provincetown because my husband is like the sweetest person ever. I mean people were like “TEMPEST DU JOUR?!” they practically SPIT on him and he still wore it and he tagged her in the photo and she didnt even regram lolololol My poor husband, I love him so much.
66. The Princess: I made a comment about the Princess’ look being shitty on Instagram once and all her fans went APESHIT. It was the two nastiest messages I ever deleted.
65. Monica Beverly Hillz I shoulda put her farther back. She was not so great.
64. Vivacious: Awwww the old battle axe of drag. I support her endaevor but her looks were so dated. I do however respect her respect for the art so…
63. Lashauwn Beyond: That name is so real. You can say she sucks but you can also say shes the spirit of drag taking you “up" so let her be.
62. Mrs. Kasha Davis: WOAH boy did she sneak by me?! She must have got here EARLY and just WAITED. She sucked so hard you kinda loved her for being honest. Kasha was like your olde gay neighbor whos taste level sucks but you respect her because she went through the AIDS crisis and is still smiling. Not even kidding.
61. BenDeLaCreme: I just did not like her.
60. Pandora Boxx: Oh god Pandora. Did you see that Unicorn video she made… bless this bitch.
59. Shangela Laquifa Wadley: Shangela was just cheap. Shangela is like the same taste level as like Paula Abdul, Mad Tv, Khols, a Sketchers Sneaker… I just never like what she does. I dont need it. Its poor person humor. Just because you say something LOUDLY doesnt make it more funny. ( as I type in CAPS)
58. Roxxxy Andrews: This poor bitch dug a damn hole… You know shes not likeable because she was shadey but she was more talented then anticipated in the creative challeges, and I thought she had nice skin. My husband HATES HER.
57. Kim Chi: One note. Refrigerator being pushed down a runway. I actually dont like her for not having the courage to be out to her parents. Its insulting to the rest of us. Buck up bitch, your mom already knows, shes known since you were 2. The fact you think she doesnt know is INSANE. Your non outness renders any talent moot.
56. Adore Delano: Thanks but Ive been to Hot Topic, NEXT.
55: Acid Betty: I don’t remember much about the 00S BUT I STILL REMEMBER THOSE WIGS.
54. Courtney Act: Ok sure, but wheres the interesting part???? Her finale dress that was like rainbow hologram acetate was cool and nobody even mentioned it.
53. Trixie Mattel: I tried so hard to be nice to her in Provincetown and she was a cunt. Why are you a cunt to someone being NICE to you?
52. Coco Montrese : I could say mean shit but I wont. shes worked long and hard and deserves a clap. Shes not even a cunt. shes out of touch but shes from another world. Respect your elders.
51. Dida Ritz: Talk about out of touch. Her weird self loathing “Im a white girl” routine turned me into Jasmine Masters?! Like EWWW NO, learn to love yourself BITCH. We all know she did one of the best lip synchs ever.
50. Stacy Layne Matthews: Wait shes NOT black?!??? She was from BACK SWAMP, that gets TREMENDOUS “SWAMP CRED” She was so fat her hormones were just like “WHATEVER.. theres simply "NOT ENOUGH of us to go around?! WE DONT KNOW WHERE TO GO.. What do you wanna be today??? When was the last time youve seen your genitals because are you SURE youre still a male?? We dont know and could use some DIRECTION?!” and I appreciate that. I like people who are just like IM WHATEVER. Not everyone has to be a male or a female you know.
49. Jade Jolie: Jade is surprisingly the fishiest queen in my opinion. I saw her at the premiere party before her season started and we honestly thought she might be BIOLOGICAL. This holds some cache in an art of trying to be a woman at least SOMEWHAT. She made the unfortunate mistake of becoming Alyssas ENEMY which at the time was ACTUALLY kinda necessary because if you remember when Alyssa first started she was not the Alyssa we know and love and was kinda of a cunt who needed to get CLOCKED. BACK ROLLS has now been mutters a million times by ME ALONE and lets be honest WERE ALL now VERY CONSCIOUS of our back rolls now. I even got COOL SCULPTING and yes it worked. It works if youre like semi normal with a slight love handle or backroll but not if you have a spare tire because then its just like removing a brick from a wall, and no it didnt hurt, but get it done in Florida because procedures are cheaper there. Florida is basically LAWLESS, they also gave me a VITAMIN DRIP as I did it. That is not legal in NYC.
Jade had horrible style and made what looked like NAZI MATRIX PORN but dont imagine that in a good sorta Night Porter chic Nazi way. Imagine it as a black vinyl raincoat that that greasy haired kid in high school who wasnt allowed to be a faggot because you already had that role and did it better so he sorta segued into FETISH GOTH would have and now imagine him filming himself masturbating with a NON APPLE iPhone to a Marilyn Mason poster… That was her porn.
48. Sonique: Sonique is responsible for one of the wisest self realizations to ever surface on RPDR to me. After getting the chop she said something along the lines of “Well I guess theres more to life than being better than everyone.” YUP. Stop competing, life isnt a competition. You do you and thats your challenge, forget about everyone elses storyline.
47. Mystique Summers Madison: DANGEROUS PERSON but such good TV. To me it seems Mystique has the kind of tongue that can only tell lies, which is sad because that means she thinks whatever the truth is is so terrible she has to come up with an alternative. Thats unfortunate. That said I dont want her in my home. If she lies to herself and others this means she feels she doesnt have to play by the rules and probably steals. Did I just imagine her a thief? Yes, I did. I imagined her at a party at my house slipping one of my Versace candy dishes in her pocket WITH THE SOUR PATCH KIDS STILL IN IT.
46. Gia Gunn: Gia to me really is the sorta line between the queens you care about and the queens you take the opportunity to go get a drink while they come on stage. I took my two assistants on that Drag Cruise as a present and I cant remember what exactly happened but somebodies sneakers were TEMPORARILY ABDUCTED and Gia was UNNFUCKED and SURLY ABOUT IT. Gia on the show was half gross and half awesome. I feel shed LIKE to be nice but has so much DEFENSIVE ANGER she can’t. Its a mistake as shed be much more successful if she got over that. She really feels herself despite having a wonky eye, really short legs, and likening herself to Talapia and aligning herself to TIM GUNN??? Your fashion references are from TV????!… OH GURL… NO!.… I like her though. Shes a talented performer. I feel like Gia is that friend you have thats sorta like a bad dog on leash. You have to be careful with them when around kind people but theyre also helpful because theyre more than eager to be the bad guy if someone is bugging you. We all have that friend and theyre kinda fierce.
45. Mariah. Mariah walked into the room first episode and I thought DAMN shes FIERCE… and then she never looked that good again. If I was just going by tv, which Im 98% going by shed be placed lower BUT I saw her on that drag cruise and her performance was PERFECT. It was CLASSIC DRAG but executed flawlessly and she was nice when we got stuck in the elevator with her. I feel like she thinks she has to be mean or fierce or whatever when shed actually be more well received if she was the person I saw on the cruise who was down to Earth and chill.
44. Milan: Milan is one of the few New York Queens that Ive ACTUALLY SEEN OUT. These other queens im always like NEW YORK? NEW YORK WHERE?!? Im a third generation new Yorker who has lived here 18 years on my own and Ive never seen most of these queens who claim to be from NYC. Milan is nice and a talented performer. I was never into her drag because shes real STAGE oriented and real JULIARD STYLE ( I dunno if she actually went there) and thats just not my interest but she at least TRIED.
43. Dax ExclamationPoint: I feel Dax sorta made a mistake pigeon holing herself as “Queen of the nerds”, as soon as someone claims identity of something on camera queens for some reason HATE IT. I imagine its some kind of projected self loathing as gays are trained to hate themselves. Like how dare YOU assert yourself as something, you CANT do that youre a faggot. I seriously think this is the unconscious voice in 98 percent of gay guys heads and its why so many are self sabotaging or drug addicts and why there is no such thing as a gay gay icon and even kinda why DRAG EXISTS AT ALL. We cant like ourselves because straight society taught us to hate ourselves so we put it all onto a fantastic woman. Dax seems like a nice person who doesnt have that insane person need to “win” and therefore really shouldnt have been on the show as she just got used as sacrifice for hungrier queens.
42. Kennedy Davenport: Wait did I already do Kennedy Davenport because I really didnt like her??? huh I guess I didnt. Well maybe my unconscious mind liked her more than my reptile ego did and she got placed higher than anticipated. How can you hate on a hard working talent who has a retarded sister she has to support?! Jesus christ give the bitch a tip and never do less than a FIVE when tipping queens people A DOLLAR IS THE SAME THING AS A QUARTER!
41. India Ferrah: Oh god I worry saying mean things about India because I dont want to hurt her feelings as worry that she TEETERS ON SANITY but she to me is what drag is WHEN I DONT LIKE DRAG. Her “combat contour” is brutalist to the point of being vulgar. To me her styling concept is PUT EVERYTHING YOU OWN ON NOW BECAUSE MAYBE WE NEED TO RUN OUT THE DOOR AFTERWARD. I mean its the 8 foot braid with a giant bow, and the top hat, and the body stocking, and the thigh high boot, and the breast plate, now a giant necklace to cover the edge of the fake boobs, now put a spider SUCKLING THE TIT of the breastplate, oh wait I have TWO BOOBS and I NEED ANOTHER SPIDER, now add a couple jewels to the eyes of the spider OH WAIT spiders have six eyes so add four more… now what about belts, I only have TWELVE….
40. Mimi Imfurst: OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?! She fucking CAPTURED India ferrah like some kind of MOUNTAIN TROLL?!?!? That was one of the most amazingly insane moments on TV ever! Then when Raven WENT IN on her in All Stars …omg I have that segment saved on my phone and just watch it when I need to feel “myself” again. Mimi on the cruise actually did the best read on the Michelle Visage roast. Shes smart but lets her inner voices get the best of her. We all have inner voices but I feel chubby people are chubby because the voices are louder. Im not even saying it to be a dick but it seems like with people who suffer from body issues LIKE ME the inner voices are so LOUD you can see them reacting to them on their face. Hang around me long enough and you’ll totally see this. This is called being a function insane person!
39. Morgan McMichaels: Ahhh the Morgan McMonkey! Did you know shes actually Scottish, like from Scotland? That didnt come off on the show. Ok Morgan to me is interesting because as a person Morgan is just not my kinda person, she even has a SUPERMAN TATTOO and you know how much I hate Superman as to me he is the OPPOSITE OF CREATIVITY and a HERO TO SHEEP but that does NOT discount her talents. Ive seen her perform live and shes VERY good. Do I want to hang with her NO, is she a solid talent YES. I met her once and she tried to tell me she doesnt eat pork because PIGS DONT HAVE KIDNEYS. She said this while chain smoking cigarettes and drinking heavily… hmmmm. I dont even know how to organize the judgements I have. All this said I feel if Morgan was your friend you could trust her and shed definitely not be afraid of taking a hit to defend you.
38. April Carrion: She is the best example of being chopped too soon. Shes very talented and pretty and makes her own looks and I respect her abilities. She had more to offer as Ive seen other looks of hers and they were good. Too much of a shrinking violet to survive a comepetition. Shes quite lovely Im surprised she hasnt got some rich old benefactor.
37. Nicole Paige Brooks Oh my fuckin god Nicole Paige Brooks?!?!? Nicole is so important as she is SO MANY THINGS. Nicole is the ESSENCE OF REGIONAL TALENT. She is THE small town coke head faggot drag queen WE ALL KNOW. My mom would have had her on PROBATION. The spirit that has possessed Nicoles body is an ancient spirit which haunts every rural gay bar! Remember how she had the hots for Raven and also had FRECH TIP TOENAILS?!…That BODY built EXCLUSIVELY by COCAINE. Ugh.. Ive never even seen Nicole but I know her sooo well. Nicole has that IVE BEEN TO PRISON and ALSO HAVE CHILDREN and ALSO HAVE A CLOSETED BLACK BOYFRIEND vibe that is SO PURE. Nicole is the queen who marches in the regional gay pride parade wearing flat sandals and a bikini and ACCEPTS TIPS while she does it! Nicole might also work at BEST BUY when “O.D” (out of drag). and when in drag theres also the worry that she might ACTUALLY O.D. Nicole is important.
36. Carmen Carrera: Ok Carmen is from Jersey where its NOT EASY to be a gay soul. Carmen once tried to tell me its ok that straight guys call you a faggot there because its not an isult its just what you are… EEEESSSSHKKK That is some HARDCORE Stockholm Syndrome. I could say more but its none of my damn business. Im not crazy about Carmen because I think shes made some choices based on where shes from but thats none of my damn business so I’ll shut the fuck up. To me Carmen is an example of an unfortunate situation. Ive had to deal with those hardened Jersey boys as a kid and as a tender gay boy its NOT A NICE THING and it would have been easier for me if I was just a girl too. Yes shes pretty, I wish her happiness. If I was raised where she was maybe I would have killed myself. In a way she sorta did I guess but also rebirthed herself.. maybe I need to give her more credit.
Im going to add this. Most of us have to deal with being a "faggot” in a straight world and deal with it however we choose. I for example fetishisize it as for me its a safe place thats at least exciting as its FIERCE to have your hot husband call you a faggot as he bangs your puss hole out. At least that way youre dealing with the anxiety in a safe place and its HOT its also a lot easier than getting a sex change, pretending it never happened, and siding with your abusers in an effort to make the best of a bad situation. Maybe Ive made the wrong choice, see instead of siding with them and changing my sex I went punk and just write horrible things about them on St Patricks day and work out a lot so I can intimidate them on the street. SIDENOTE I have NEVER had someone make an anti gay comment to me when they’re by themselves, have you ever noticed that? The comments are only made when youre out numbered… fuckin pussies.
35. Jiggly Caliente: Jiggly is real.
34. Victoria “Porkchop” Parker: Porkchop must be worshipped as she was sacrificed for all our sins.
32. Ivy Winters: Nobody ever put it together that Ivy Winters looks almost identical to Grace Jones AND Jean Kasem. That is POWERFUL MAGIC. Too bad she didnt know it either because if she channeled that spirit she could have won this thing so damn easy.
31. Pearl:
31. Tatiana: The day Tati steps away from low brow nineties references and learns to kick is the day Tati advances much farther. She NEVER uses her legs and her legs are AMAZING?! I wish she woulda had the self confidence to get tougher on Raven when Raven attacked her on her season because it was so clear that Raven was operating out of total jealousy being both have great beauty but for Tati it was effortless and for Raven its four hours of incredibly skilled painting. Tati was too green to have that wisdom. If she had it…ooooohhhhh it woulda been FUHEEEEIRCE!
30. Laganja Estranja: Oh god… I dont have the mental capacity at this point to go into the psyche of Laganja…Laganja is so important. Laganja is the litmus for bad faggotry because shes ACTUALLY TALENTED, shes got an amazing body, but OH GOD shes a nightmare. You can tell her parents felt guilty and coddled and spoiled their baby gay into a place where the only way she now knows how to operate is to be a needy indulged victim. Her comedy routine with the old people was a SURREALIST MASTER PIECE. Get off drugs laganja, they dont make you cool and needing the crutch of a vice does not a personality make.
29: Jinkx Monsoon: Does anyone else remember how bad she was at the beginning of her season??? She got the ONLY edit and they spun her into a storyline where theres was no way she could loose. Ive seen this storyline somewhere and it was called PRETTY IN PINK. They basically realized she both Molly Ringwalds character AND the Ducky character at the same time and spun a storyline for her to win because they hadnt a queen like her yet. She is talented, not my kinda talent but whatevs, to me shes the MACARONI ART of drag. She woulda been my friend first year of art school but then you have to change schools because you find out she has a crush thats a touch much on you and its weird because you thought you were just good friends.
28. Tyra Sanchez: In person I think Tyra might be the most beautiful of all the queens actually. You won’t believe this but its true, she’s a stunner. Too bad she just wants to be the best Beyonce, and not the best Tyra. Tyra, you be TYRA because Trinity K already does a waaaaaaaaay better Beyonce to be honest and youre actually so good on your own if you just owned YOURSELF youd be extraordinary. Its a shame she doesnt have the insight or desire to be HERSELF. Isnt that INSANE??? Its why nobody likes her, because SHE doesnt like her?!
27. Alexis Mateo: When you read her name do you also read it with a lisp? I do! Alexis is a sweet person whom I really appreciate and is also a victim of the pageant system. Pageant girls suffer from not fully grasping why the pageant system is bad. Ladies, we dont think YOU are bad, we think youre victims of a horrible oppressive system that wishes to put women into a structure of something like a DOG show. THIS IS DEGRADING NOT ONLY TO YOU BUT TO ALL FEMALES. It attempts to organize the female sex into ONE SINGULAR IDEAL based on the values of MEN and thats FUCKED UP. To organize females into ONE SINGULAR IDEAL is HORRIBLE and ROTTEN. It DEVALUES any ability that men might see as something THEY have to deal with and DENIES ABILITIES and STRENGTH to women creating an oppressive structure for females to operate in. Its GROSS, dont buy into it, its not cool!
26. Shannel: I know you dont agree but Shannel is important. Shannel wears VON DUTCH HATS. Shannels best friend is the WHISPERING FACE in the mirror that tells her to believe insane things. Shannel has THE BEST EYES of all contestants. Shannel belongs to a mentally ill race of people known as SHOW FOLK. Shannel thought JUGGLING while walking down the runway would be IMPRESSIVE. Shannel paid FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS for that garment and Shannel paid TOO MUCH. Shannel WAS NOT ELIMINATED… SHE CHOSE TO LEAVE!….. Shannel is important.
OK the TOP TWENTY FIVE IS SERIOUS BUSINESS. These are the APEX PREDATORS!!! Have you noticed as the list has gone on the comments have gone from VENOMOUS and PUNISHING to RESPECTFUL ACCOLADE and thats because as the list goes the talent increases and Im grateful that these people are inspiring, not wasting my time, and are championing values that need to be championed! When I typed this I just got so excited I moved my ENTIRE BODY on top of my little clear desk chair and Im sitting here typing like a GARGOYLE! Every single one of these queens are a WINNER and I mean that. Im not just saying this shit, each one of these queens is a SOLID ARCHETYPE and depending on your own values you could place most of them in the top five and have a SOLID ARGUMENT. This list however is MY opinion and MY VALUES so this is much more about ME than THEM of course. Honestly every single queen on this entire list is a talent and deserves respect for making the effort!… yes even Phi-phi. To be in the top twenty five however means you can STAND YOUR GROUND AND OWN YOUR OWN CROWN. Remember this is MY list. Youll understand reading this list I value creativity and HEIGHT more than anything. Being fishy doesnt count for much to me and if youre dumb and dishonest it aint gonna work out…. Here are THE MOST IMPORTANT QUEENS OF RUPAULS DRAG RACE!!!
25. Jessica Wild: AHAHAHAHAHAH HAHAH How the FUCK did Jessica Wild make the top list?! FUCK YES MISS JESSICA you MADE IT!! Ahahah this is WONDERFUl. I secretly admit I LOVE Jessica. Ill go so far to say shes almost like a KINDER EN ESPAñOL version of Alyssa! Jessica live is FUN and shes VERY KIND. I met her and she was a doll. Jessica is GOOD VIBES. I can totally hang with Jessy. Is she creative? NOPE. Is she Edgy? NOPE. Is she fierce… actually she kinda is???!. Shes a good person who you can tell HONESTLY LOVES DRAG and has fun doing it and THAT is why she made top 25! Shes a pure soul who enjoys what she does and that its the SPIRIT and HONESTY rarely found on EARTH!
24. Max: Max CLEARLY is really into Kristen Mcnemany. Max served us upper middle class white privilege. She was NOT bound by the oppressive low class moral standards of gender and sexuality! Max allowed herself to be flat chested and have GREY hair and this says IM WEALTHY AND EDUCATED ENOUGH NOT TO HAVE TO PLAY BY A MANS RULES AND BE A BIMBO YOU POOR PEOPLE?! Max was well read and Max is probably the most well travelled person in the semi mid west sorta shitty small to medium sized city in which I imagine she is from NEXT TO HER SISTER that was in THE PEACE CORPS (I imagine). I bet Max went to a college that was previously ONLY FOR GIRLS. Off the show Max really gave some fantastic editorial moments. I appreciated Max, she was refreshing.
23. Naomi Smalls: The Praying Mantis of drag! Naomis skeleton is the best of all the girls and thats why shes here. TALL and THIN is SO IMPORTANT. She actually was a nice person and very creative too. I don’t like how people discounted her, she was far more creative than most of these people.
22. Milk: Milk is kinda like Max but not as annoying as a person and more “boy aware”. Like I imagine sitting on train with Max might be tedious as her affectations are what got her chopped, and Milk though shes a touch WASPY for my tastes is actually cool and smart and you could share and laugh with her. Milk was MY club name in the 90s so thats interesting as were both tall white people I guess that name just gets handed to you. Milk is sorta the Sandra Bernhardt of RPDR to me but maybe its just the STRONG NOSE. I liked Milks Pinnochio A LOT but if I remember correctly she used the same wig or a pair of shoes a few times and that DOES get a deduction. She was REAL “I have a mom who went to college and shes tall and for my birthday she bought me an AFGHAN (the dog).” . SMART WHITE PEOPLE LIFE… basically everyone I went to college with.
21. Joslyn Fox: Jossy Fox is not trying to be anything she isnt and that is her refreshing appeal. Jossy shops at Tj Maxx and has lunch at Panera because she used to work there and still gets a discount because her fag hag never left despite making a lot of lateral moves that took her nowhere. If I had kids Id hire Jossy to babysit them. Jossy asked to have my husband visit her at her dining table on the drag cruise, BUT NOT ME.
20. Willam: I really should have put Willam at a higher ranking place simply because shes a class act and one of the only queens whos never asked for a discount and buys my clothes. She is the one queen who decided to play by her own rules which sorta bit her in the ass ALMOST, but shes also one of the only queens who has her own career outside of RPDR. I like Willam, shes distant and calculating, but so am I.
19. Ongina: Ongina is important because shes the first one to show that to be successful on the show its not about your elaborately constructed artifice that you might THINK is what makes people like you, but about the REAL YOU you fear to show others that is what makes people like you and this TEENY BEING had the balls to do it. Ongina is all about the live performance as shes a total charmer. She can dance in the palm of your hand and sleeps in a walnut shell at night. Her charm is her human connection that you dont get from most performers and you can’t really get from TV.
18. Manila Luzon: Manilla gives the best costumes in drag styling. Her puppet faces are great, but ONE TIME USE, so shes a little for the kiddies and straight people who only see her once and dont follow drag so thats why she isnt higher for me. Remember if youre top 25 youre iconic! Im just organizing MY VALUES here so its not about these queens abilities but more about MY PERSONAL AGENDA and how I would ORGANIZE WORLD VALUES should I be given the chance…. (echoing Skeletor laugh)
17. Latrice Royale: Latrice is the spirit of America. If you dont like Latrice YOU ARE ISIS. Watch her performance at the season finale where Violet wins, its sooo darn good. Id love to put her farther up but I cant because she only wears THE SAME PAIR OF SHOES with every look. Lady… lay out some coins stop “living poor”. The moment you spend the dough to move yourself forward YOU ACTUALLY MOVE FORWARD. Stop living in a world where you cant afford shoes, break out of that mindset where youre worried to spend a little cash because you might not have it. LIVE RICHLY…YOU CAN AFFORD SHOES. That said remember CREDIT IS NOT CASH BITCH, do NOT use a credit card pretend you have the fantasy of the security of wealth, but I KNOW you at least have 49.99 for a plus size pair of PLEASERS!
16. Katya. The first time I saw Katya I thought TOTAL FORMER COKE HEAD… and I was right. Thats not a read its just the vibes. I think shes very smart and funny and her finale “read ya” was the best of al of them BUT she got a TOTAL SWEETHEART EDIT BECAUSE ALASKA WAS SLAUGHTERING EVERYONE so they needed to make it seem at least a LITTLE like a competition (though detox was like on another level) but I REALLY dont like that FORCED self deprecation and FAKE NICE LAUGH she gives people ESPECIALLY Trixie.. Stop GIFTING her that reaction, we all see right through it! It comes off like less of a laugh and more of an APOLOGY for existing and you dont need to do it youre fierce, just stop. Before you get too big a head though I have to be a good person and let you know your finale look on All Stars was the THIRD worst look ever to go down the runway behind Serena and Cynthia. Don’t believe me???.. check out the hemline.
15 Jujubee: Out of all the queens I think if I had to spend an extended period of time with them Id choose Juju. Shes smart and funny and hopefully that would give me the opportunity to teach her about STYLING because she needs some help. Damn your looks are CHEAP woman. They sell Vogue at the GROCERY STORE!? Im not even asking for the far superior Italian Vogue, Im just saying SHITTY COMMERCIAL GROCERY STORE FASHION MAGAZINE VOGUE. Pick it up and then look at your clothes and figure out the difference. I actually think Juju might be the funniest queen even over Bianca. Shes certainly one of the smartest, and dont forget her library reading was really good.
14. Trinity K. Bonet: I imagine youre suprised at Trinity ranking so high up. Trinity is something I respect.. QUIET CONFIDENCE. Trinity was too damn well mannered to get as far as she should have in the competition and the reason why is Trinity K is the personality type I really respect who is someone who is QUIET and TALENTED. She lets her talents do the talking and unfortunately for good tv you cant just sit there and wait to slay on the runway, you have to have provide soundbytes and dramtic facial gestures for gifs etc. Trinity respectfully minded her own damn business and let her abilities do the talking and I REALLY like that. I went on that nightmarish drag cruise and hands down the best performance was Trinity it was about a ten minute Beyonce number and it was BETTER than Beyonce. It was FANTASTIC and im not even a Beyonce fan. I also think shes very beautiful and has a total Angela Basset quality to her which Im charmed by. Trinity was well mannered and polite and I kinda wanted to be her friend because someone like that benefits from someone like me who isnt afraid to maybe NOT be so polite should the rare occasion call for it. I guess Bianca kinda saw that too. I kinda think for some weird reason Im sweet on her because Tina Turner was my first concert at 8 years old, which I won the tickets to answering Tina Turner Triva on the radio, and that remeinds me of my mom who I went to the concert with and so therefor I want to protect this “good woman”.
13. Nina Flowers: Speaking of good women the next is Nina Flowers. I have NEVER heard ONE person say ONE bad thing about Nina and the multiple times Ive met her she is KIND AND LOVELY. Nina endured that entire CONFLAMA of SEASON 1 and DIDNT EVEN GET THE PALTRY 10k she deserved?! THEN Nina got CURSED with being paired with RAVING MAD WOMAN TAMMIE BROWN and ROLLED WITH IT without complaint. In fact if you watch All Stars 1 instead of complaining Nina handles her like a loving mother who has a RETARDED CHILD who YELLS A LOT. Speaking of YELLING RETARDED PEOPLE one time my husband and I were in Miami and we bought BAD PILLS (is there any other kind in Miami) and were TWACKED OUT ASSHOLES and ran into her and we COULD NOT SHUT THE FUCK UP and she was SO TOLERANT, AND SO NICE, AND SO UNBOTHERED that we almost wondered if we PASSED FOR SANE. Looking back WE DID NOT, Nina was just really nice. Nina is also a great Dj who really gets that CUNT FACTOR and makes for a great night out.
12 Miss Fame: Drag being an art form that relies so heavily on the magic of transformation being the best make up artist of all the queens certainly gets you TOP THREE placement. Too bad Miss Fame is the SECOND BEST MAKE UP ARTIST of Rupauls drag race. If this was a BIOLOGICAL female make-up challenge Fame would be the best, but DRAG MAKE UP is a VERY different art form. Fame had fantastic looks and a greatly appreciate her. I just wish the brains matched the visuals because theyre SO sharp. She really is the Linda of RPDR. Linda was my SECOND choice of the Supermodels, my first was Nadja so you can see where Im coming from. To me alien proportions and snowgress fantasies trump “classic fashion perfection”.
11. Chi Chi DeVayne : Chi Chi Devayne is THE SPIRIT OF DRAG. Chi chi is POOR AS FUCK and still managed to teach herself how to do BACKFLIPS IN HEELS. THERE IS NO REASON FOR ALL OF US NOT TO BE ABLE TO DO THE SAME BUT WE CANNOT! She is THE DRAG ASSASSIN. I respect her SO much. Imagine if she was given the same opportunities any of us in the North East of the United States were given?! When I was a little kid I wasnt rich either but I feel in North Eastern America you can receive a great education and you dont have to be wealthy at all. A good education is just kind of built into the psyche just like our PURITANICAL JUDGEMENT. I mean as a kid I grew up in a tiny single parent home next to a pond and it certainly wasnt GLAMOROUS but if I felt like it my 8 year old self could wander over to the neighbors house which was basically THE ADDAMS FAMILY MANSION to me which belonged to the professor who established the local community college and Id just sit there in his living room while he and his wife watched JULIA CHILD Id point at the random objects hed collected from around the world and ask “Whats that?!” and hed reply “That is a TURKISH BULLWHIP!” FIERCE?! ..with that information alone not only did I learn of exotic locations I never heard of I knew I TOO wanted to go there AND had the ability too. Something tells me being from Louisianna Chi Chi didnt have the opportunity to learn how to cook LONDON BROIL (I still remember Julia saying “Ooh this roast is SPITTING at me) while sitting in the dark at a baby grand piano while a Grandfather clock gonged in the background like these people did. It would be VERY EASY to be an angry bitter person coming from her situation and instead Chi Chi took it upon herself to excel to the best of her abilities and BOY HAS SHE. I feel Chi Chi was THE BEST when it came to Lipsynch for your life. All she needs is 12 months, a handful of those McDonalds gift certificates you got at Halloween, a stack of VHS tapes of STYLE with ELSA KLENSCH, 6 National Geographic magazines, and everyone dies. Chi Chi is FIERCE.
10 Chad Michaels: Being the number one Cher impersonator in the world gets you top ten placement forever. Its not debatable its DRAG LAW.
9.Tammie Brown: Tammie Brown is an UNCONTROLLABLE FORCE OF NATURE. Tammy is the SWIRLING POWER OF CHAOS. GRAVITY DECIDES TO LEAVE WHEN TAMMIE IS AROUND! Tammies superpower is that she holds no power unto her own but EVERYONE ELSES POWERS ARE RENDERED USELESS WHEN SHE WALKS IN THE ROOM. NO QUEEN has any power over Tammie and for THAT ALONE she gets top ten placement. Have you ever seen those crazy cat videos of cats reacting to people who throw a cucumber on the ground? If you havent, check them out, but in a nut shell cats are for some reason TOTALLY FREAKED OUT by a cucumber sitting on the ground. They go from acting relatively sane to COMPLETELY BIZARRE at the toss of a cucumber… well TAMMY IS THAT CUCUMBER.
8. Bianca Del Rio: Bianca is a hard working professional and a talent and Im glad we have her on “our” side as I cant think of any straight comedian who could beat her in a “read off”. She doesnt particularly check any of my boxes as what she is Im not super into but you cant deny her abilities. Shes the sharpest tack. My friend Bradford hired her for a dinner and it was fine and fun and all and as she was walking out the door my NUMB NUT husband brings up “but what about the movie youre making?” this of course lead her to go on about how shes raising money etc so then BRADFORD THE ASSHOLE makes everyone say how much theyre going to donate to her film putting me on the spot to donate 500 dollars to the fucking crappy movie?! It was well shot but UGH LADY wheres the funny? I paid FIVE HUNDRED GOD DAMN DOLLARS FOR THAT MOVIE?!?! FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS….. FUCK…. thats TWO tickets to see CHER?!?!?!?
7.Sharon Needles: When Sharon first came out I BOUGHT IT, literally, I bought the t shirt which was secrelty packed as a GLITTER BOMB.. FUCKING CUNT…She really gave us hope and spoke to so many and was a creative and funny star. Shes a great talent who has done some amazing looks. Unfortunately shes become super sour and nasty and nobody wants to work with her and former fans are made uncomfortable to be around her. Sharon Needles is THE BEST DRAG QUEEN nobody wants to be around.
6. Violet Chachki: Im pretty sure Violet was trained by a SITH LORD or something. Shes CURIOUSLY YOUNG to be so professional and SO on point and just soooo good. God I hated the idiot RPDR fan base who talked shit about her simply because they couldnt relate to her because she was confident in her abilities. A wolf does NOT consult the sheep as to what to have for dinner!?! Im sorry but thats NOT something to make apologies for and its CERTAINLY not something you need to change. Nobody should have to dumb themselves down for the masses and Violet has not. She consistently DOMINATES THEM with her BITCH GODDESS self and Im SOOOO THANKFUL FOR THAT. This icy goddess holds the title for the number one AND number two AND number three best gowns on RPDR history. Dont go against Violet you WILL loose.
5. Alaska: Alaska broke all the rules by being HER OWN CREATURE. You cant pin down Alaska as one specific thing. Shes is an entity unto her own and that is so important to recognize. Shes also maybe the smartest queen of all of them. Her drag is a critique of drag itself which makes her a more evolved creature compared to “lesser” queens. Like all these top five shes really carved out PERSONALITY in her drag persona. Shes maybe made me laugh more than any other queen.The only “negative” I can think of is I dont like her interest in nails, seems like something India Ferra would be into. Its sorta weird that she named herself Alaska when the biggest gay icon in Spain and many other Spanish speaking nations is Alaska but shes from Pittsburg, not Madrid.
4. Alyssa Edwards: Oh fuck is Alyssa Edwards important! The DON KNOTSS of Drag Alyssa is sorta just like Texas from which she hails… BIG AND WEIRD THINKING AND despite being the essence of AMERICA its also ITS OWN ENTITY and by its own design is flawless and also VERY FLAWED! Remember when ALyssa first started and she was mean and people did not like her?! This is important to recognize because Alyssa HOOKED US with a very special chemistry of herself as a real person and this SWIRLY KOOKOO TOWN that her psyche exists in where shes the MAYOR, THE RICHEST LADY, THE NOSEY NEIGHBOR, AND THE BEAUTY QUEEN! Shes all those things and we get to see them all exist in every gesture. The gif of her negotiating a sip on an extra long straw was just as responsible for us falling in love with her as was her UNSELFAWARNESS (is that a word?) upon the HARD REVEAL of her BACKROLLS. Those lips and eyes are insanely MAGNETIC but all of it would be only half as magnetic if we didnt know what a LOOSEY GOOSEY she is?! You KNOW that Alyssa PERFORMS FOR NOBODY when shes by herself…. OFTEN.
Alyssa I think is the only queen Ive ever hired and she got out of a cab by herself in FULL DRAG wearing like a TEDDY and a SHEER DRESSING GOWN and walked down the street in broad daylight asking my assistant if the MEXICAN RESTAURANT ON THE CORNER was where she was PERFORMING?!?! Alyssas personal styling is: “Dress, not particularly expensive shoe, AND PIECE OF THING ON HER HEAD- but NOT a complete thing on her head just a PART of something on her head! Its the VAGUE ALLUSION that this is part of MAYBE SOMETHING GREATER, or maybe shes been to SPAIN, or maybe she shoplifts at CLAIRES BOUTIQUE?!
Alyssa is an America treasure!
3. Raven: Raven is JEALOUS BEAUTY. RAVEN IS EVERY FIERCE VILLAINESS THAT EVER EXISTED. Raven VERY EASILY could be my number one BUT IM LEARNING TO LOVE MYSELF and Im not going to SIT HERE and WAIT to be loved by someone I adore as they DENY MY EXISTENCE simply because THEY THEMSELVES are incapable of being loved. I already DID THAT SHOW its called ME AND MY DAD and thanks but over a lifetime as a child I sat there on the couch waiting for him to show up, which he often DID NOT, as I hoped that MAGICALLY ONE DAY this person you adore is suddenly going to take interest in you. GUESS WHAT… IT AINT GONNA HAPPEN!!! I might love Raven but RAVEN CANT LOVE BACK and instead of being MAD (like I was for a lifetime with my own dad) Im going to recognize that I dont hate this person at all, in fact this VILLAIN is a HERO to me and though I wish theyd be capable of liking me back theyre NOT and THATS OK. Im not the bad guy for that, and neither is Raven, and neither is my dad. Its something they cant do and MAYBE someday they will and if so THATS GREAT but until then Im gonna love myself and put interest in people who reciprocate my feelings.This all may sound like I had some kind of ACTUAL relationsship with Raven WHICH I HAVE NOT but Ravens entire DRAG CONCEPT HER VERY DRAG BEING is that story line to me. The even more twisted part is we love Raven BECAUSE shes cruel?!?! I think shes TREMENDOUS! Raven is THE EVIL QUEEN from Snow White, shes Alexis from Dynasty, shes Katra from She-ra. Raven IS jealous beauty. Raven is a cruel and powerful goddess and I LIVE for her. We have tried SO MANY times to hire her and it falls on dead ears. Shes cannot be bothered. She needs to GET BOTHERED because the reason why shes not an All Star is because she cant be. I mean I think its really because shes had a couple DUIs and theres no way a liquor company was gonna give 100k to a person who has 2 DUIS but you know what I mean….
Raven is also THE BEST DRAG MAKEUP ARTIST. All these future queens stand on Ravens trompe l’oeil bone structure. Ravens one word comments on fashion photo Ruview make me HOWL. Ravens astute observations are as sharp as her nose contour. Raven has the teeniest room for evolution spiritually I think JUST A TEENY BIT, like DONT CHANGE, but MAYBE get a LITTLE kind and Raven will be my number one and OH GOD I want her to be number one SO BAD.
2. Raja. Ok, now Im back to sitting on my tiny clear desk chair like a Gargoyle because its THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT QUEENS?!!?!? VERY SIMPLY without Raja Rupauls Drag Race would be MEXICAN TELEVISION! The show would be an FAR less elevated and be a GOOPEY SUNDAE of WIGS AND BOOBS AND WELL WORN DRESSES THAT SMELL LIKE B.O and ANGEL! Raja brings in references that lift the entire competition UP. Alyssa is Cosmopolitan but Raja is ITALIAN VOGUE AND NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC. Shes still the best runway walker of all the queens which is like MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING. In her single season she gave us gold robot, amazon tribes person, Marie Antoinette, and when she walked in first episode it was the most obvious time someone was CLEARLY the winner from MINUTE ONE.
Raja is the PUBLIC TELEVISION OF DRAG RACE! A FUNDAMENTAL NECESSITY to the CLASS LEVEL of Rupauls Drag Race and without her the floor would drop out. LETS IMAGINE AN AFRICAN WATERING HOLE with baboons squeeling, zebras making their weirdo sounds that you would never expect to come from a horse, hippos eating, hyenas laughing and all of a sudden the GIRAFFE enters the scene and everyone SHUTS UP AND STARES… Well RAJA IS THAT GIRAFFE… and yes Shangela and Yarra Sofia are the babbons. We need LESS BABOONS and MORE GIRAFFES. If I HAD to make a negative critque Id say Id just like to see LESS POT and WINE references on her facebook page because when I read that I think she might be mildly depressed and I dont want that from this creative talent whom I adore!
1. Detox. DETOX IS CHARISMA. Detox IS the MUGLER woman. Thierry Mugler is what saved me in college. Mugler is clearly what has saved Detox as well. The first time I saw Thierry Muglers work was at a newsstand in VALENCIA CALIFORNIA at CalArts and his robot suit was on the cover of STERN magazine and I grabbed it, and some suburban TWAT MOM shot me side eye because the robot suit shows nipple and of course she disapproved that because she was JUDGEY UNTRAVELED TRASH. I looked inside at his work and I thought I WANT TO BE WHERE THESE PEOPLE EXIST?!?!? I actually brought the magazine to my mentor and said “I NEED TO BE HERE.” Well Detox takes me to that place! I can relate to Detox. Were really similar in many ways, both of us have tried to manefest that Mugler construct as best as possible and through ANY means necessary. If Raven is the Evil Queen from Disneys Snow White, Detox is Maleficent! Both are SO MAJOR how do you pick?! Well I will tell you how! Remember how in my Raven rant I was saying I was going to learn to love myself well putting Detox first is learning to love myself! Why?! Because Detox is the EVIL QUEEN who MAKES GOOD. When Alvaro offered to pay both Detox and Raven to send me a little happy 40th birthday message Raven didnt respond, and DETOX DID and REFUSED TO TAKE MONEY. You know when Skeletor feels the spirit of Christmas in the Heman Christmas special?? Well SKELETOR DETOX. Shes the VILLAIN we all love with A HEART thats open to be loved. Detox is the DAD WHO SHOWS UP.
Detox takes great measures to embody the values that mean so much to me. Its actually HARD to be this GOOD. She is SOFT AS NAILS but you still wanna FUCK HER?! She had TREMENDOUS sex appeal without being soft, amazing style without being trend driven, and shes a bitch goddess without being bitter. Detox is number one, Detox is the good mommy.

last update.... :(

hey so, i think im going to delete.

i know what youre thinking, “inactive for basically year and NOW he delete? what a lazy, selfish douche”

i have many reasons, but here is crux of it: im fucking tired guys. im really, really tired.

im just way too depressed and sick to continue making posts, content, or even tags. i can barely waking up in morning. i don’t even checking news on Syria anymore, im going mid july to find my MIA uncle and aunt anyways, so yeah i bet that’s going to turn out well.

also, im tired of negativity. i join “fandom side” of video games- more specifically, RVB- because i think it would being fun and supportive community where memes and creative ideas to thrive and to grow. that was 2012 tumblr, i was stuck in wrong year. now everyone is zealous vigilantee and harassing people and claiming that if anyone interpreting something different than them, they’re fucking criminals. discourse, stalking, callout, whatever fucking “doxxing” mean.

it reflect society today. people are so radicalized, they cannot standing to hear different view point than them- religion, politics, and apparently fandom now too? wtf, my only escape from that horseshit WAS fandom!! and now extremist assholes are everywhere. my home country, my “friends”, and my fucking stress relief?!?! its pathetic!!!

but in the end… what can you do? just roll with punches and move on, i guess

thank you so much to those who have supported me. it was great run. i had wonderful conversations with many lovely people, and i still wonder who those nice anons were. i remember every comment and tag, good and bad. my art and writing improving so much thank to positive reinforcement. i use to feel ok with sharing my ideas, even though my predictions or interpretations were deadass wrong most of in time. but they develop and improve like i did as human. i outgrow them… just like i now outgrow this…

believe me, THATS something i don’t saying lightly

basically, im not going to use my time and energy tainting my name with toxic community. im just not. im above that. i dont wanting to invest in something that i will now being burned for. im not even mad, just severely dissapointed. consider this blog permenately discontinued, same with others. i mighg start all over again or something, have to wait and see.

im going to tag people who were either kind to me, great people in general, wonderful artists, people i admire, people with great ideas/contributions, mutuals, chill blogs i follow, or people who have been following/interacting with my blog for so long it would be insulting to not give them regonition they deserve! most are combination of these. this is mostly as promo, even if they aren’t still active in fandom. they deserve better than this toxic bullshit too. i recommend them greatly, and if any of you are reading this, YOU MAKE THIS WORLD BETTER, OR AT LEAST FUCKING BEARABLE!! many others do as well, but here are people who directly making this blog’s time and experience worthwhile.

in no particular order…. (seriously, don’t reading too much into it :P)

@drag0n-qu33n @angrymintleaf @cockbiteproductions @dangern00dle @anon-ai @meleetrash @cloudsaysthings @greyofsunshine @mercmonster @mercuryblacksleg @sugar-p0p @ghostofawolf300 @freelancerkiwi @itsnotpinkitsbloodorange @wolffepack @spaguette @rhysies-puffs @theguywiththeyellowaccents @daftprodigy @the-agent-washingtub @charles-kun @selselsky @gunmetalblxck @cecexm @mad-king-jean @rottendentist @capicada @momfrienddonut @megneato @locus-desperatus @texelations @scribbleboxfoxart @volltron @randomdraggon @gaybeedle-archive @gh0st-fl0wer @neo-trickster @rose-raspberry @astronautachance @bloodmulch @happyanon-spreadlovenothate @jacy-pennys @wolfwarrior142 @hakanakiki @freshzombiewriter @so-try-left-rvb @redvioletdelights @abageal @mrjacobi @washingtoninasnowfort @agenttexsflippedshit @bigburnsides @crownedchosen @supercasey @agent-maine @local-cryptid @locusmclocusy @tealdragon @shinytoymercs @felixmcsucc @sophisticatedbrownie @the-greatest-merc @foxtrot-12 @gavinsdumbshittynosethtnonelikes @directium @cerealmonster15 @agender-washingtons @peteykins @timorous-amorous @the-meta @stellarreqs-roulette @multifandomfuck @cili-ai @wolfebain @puffballpatriot @themad-lizardking @agent0hio @agent-fried-chicken @spuddingtonbear @sinningpaladin @agentmainemeta @officialagentwashington @madmud2730 @redgraveconspiracy @powerfulpomegranate @ahsatan785 @iamilex @flawlix @captainmurdoc @companionwolf @nonegenderwithleftbeef @vlasdygoth @vollltron @forfucksakefelix

REST IN PEACE: luccicute diidatic cannibal-felix

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, @vividroute just for being my 69th follower (no i did not forget you, idk if youre even following me anymore but hey bonus points in my book)

thank you so much, i will missing you guys, but i cant doing this anymore. im sorry i couldnt having patience you do.

so why do i write this? why dont i just shut up and leave? why tag and drag these people to this post? good questions. i want you to know and understand from this experience: Karma exist. your contribution, work, kindness, EXISTENCE, ect. help me and even if you dont remembering, it impact me. i hope this doing same for you. im not going to force you believe Karma or any of that jazz. i just think that for what each of you have done, least i can doing is giving my thanks and/or explanations instead of being ingrate and abandoning everyone as i almost had, with poor rushed words. i am grateful for your presence on Earth, and i know im not only one who thinking so! ^^

now time to lay my weary ass blog to rest with one last rvb reference…

goodbye

Emile out~

Headcannons for the boys when Netflix started trending

I’m gonna rant real quick idk wtf happened but apparently this didn’t post last night so Here It Is Now


Darry:
-I think we all know it took some persuasion from Pony to invest in an account but after a while he gave in and got the up to four screens at a time pack

-Was highkey pissed when all the boys started freeloading off of it

-He’s all comfy in bed at like 9:30 getting ready to watch OISNB and he gets the message on his tv telling him that too many people are watching at once
-He checks who’s using HIS account

-He picks up his old ass phone (idk but it’s pink and has the coiled wire the bell phones)

-“GOD DAMN IT, STEVE! I JUST WANTED TO WATCH ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK IN PEACE AND I GET MY SNACK READY JUST FOR ME TO SEE YOU’RE PLAYING THREE DIFFERENT THINGS AT ONCE?”

- He’s all causal eating popcorn “Listen, Darry. They just put Moana as an option and then I saw that they have Finding Dory too and I don’t have time to watch them separately so-”

-“STEVE!”

-“PS Baby Dory is a-dor-a-ble. Totally deserved more screen time.”

-“STEVEN RANDLE!“

-“Although…I do like Ellen Degeneres’ performance…I find it quite modern and realistic.”

-“JUST TURN ONE OFF SO I CAN WATCH MY SHOW. IVE BEEN WAITING ALL DAY, PLEASE. IM NOT GOING TO WORK JUST TO PAY FOR YOU TO STOP ME FROM GETTING MY FIX OF CRAZY EYES!”

-“Dar, chill it’s like, what? Twelve dollars a month”

-“eleven ninety-nine.”

- “Wait…why are you watching Orange is the New Black?”

-“you know what…forget it. ENJOY YOUR FREELOADING!” He slams the phone so quick. He doesn’t ask about the last show

-Darry hates Piper, thinks she’s a total bitch

-He watches all the trending shows or the unpopular documentaries there’s no in between

-He’s a HuGe fan of Stranger Things

-Watches Friday Night Lights thinking it’ll remind him of his high school days

-He threatens to cancel the subscription when the boys piss him off

-it’s such a powerful threat that it has never gotten to the point where he actually had to do it, they cut the shit immediately

-legitimately how he gets the boys to get their shit together

Ponyboy:
-He convinced Darry by telling him that it would cost less than going to the movies all the time and a lot safer

-He’s the one constantly reminding everyone that it’s illegal to use their account because they’re cheating the company

-They all look at other with serious faces then turn back to Pony and laugh their asses off because the law has never stopped them before

-It makes Johnny feel bad but he needs his daily fix of One Tree Hill so he got over it

-The one watching The Great British Baking Show because the American version isn’t there but he finds the accents soothing

-He gets frustrated because he’ll think he knows what they’re making but it’s just a word used America that turns out to be a different thing in the U.K. (Stuff like Biscuits)

-tbh doesn’t know what they’re talking about half the time…that or has never heard of what they’re making in his entire young life

-He has the masked icon as his “who’s watching” profile picture

-He somehow managed to convince Darry to get the four screen plan but it was never so that the other guys could use too it was just because he wanted the higher HD quality they didn’t offer in the other plans

-If he watches something he’s ashamed of, knowing everyone has access to his history, he’ll go delete it

-Its like the My Little Pony marathons never happened

Sodapop:
-The one who gave the rest of the gang the username and password

-Worst mistake ever because now Dallas has Darry’s credit card information

-He doesn’t watch a lot of Netflix he mostly only went to movies to make Pony happy he only really enjoyed a few

-His attention span is just too short he can’t sit still to watch a movie for an hour or two

-Despite that, he can binge shows if he wants to

-If he’s sad he’ll watch Clueless and quotes the shit out of it

-Honestly Soda is the type to watch anything from a kids movie to a documentary on GMO foods like he only uses Netflix when he has nothing else to do

-To him it’s just one of those apps you don’t want to delete because you might need it but you never really use it

-His icon is the penguin

-He wishes they had a blue penguin

-but they don’t so he settles for the orange one

-he’s called the company multiple times to complain he’s waiting for them to call back

Two-bit:
-Fought Pony the first couple of days

-“SERIOUSLY? YOU WANT TO TAKE UP A SCREEN SO THAT I CANT WATCH MY OWN NETFLIX BUT LAST WEEK YOU COULDNT TAKE ME TO THE MOVIES?? YOU DIDNT EVEN HAVE TO STAY YOU COULD’VE WALKED AROUND THE MALL!!”

-“Listen, PoNyBoNeR. NOBODY and I mean NOBODY watches movies on Netflix it’s all about binging Baby Daddy, my friend.”

-“WEVE HAD THE ACCOUNT FOR A WEEK NOW YOURE SUDDENLY THE NETFLIX MASTER? WE HAVE SEVEN PEOPLE ON THIS ACCOUNT RIGHT NOW!”

-He ignores that last comment and answers the question, “Yes. And I say movies suck.”

-“DUDE the reviews for Wonder Woman were crazy I wanted to see it.”

-“Yeah, like I want to spend my precious time watching a lil twerp watch a chick flick.”

-Truth is he already went to see it five times

-Actually watches every show out there but mostly comedies

-Rewatches Friends all the time

-He’s never actually watched a movie tho

-He’s like Soda he can’t sit still long enough

-He wouldn’t have a problem buying his own account if he had to but using The Curtis’ is much more fun

-He had the free trial for a month but he canceled his subscription when it was over like he does with every other free trial

Dally:
-Only uses the account to watch porn in good quality

-That’s literally it I’m serious he doesn’t care for tv shows or movies it doesn’t have any other use to him

-Well he’s waiting for a good investment to come along and then he’s swiping that credit card info so
quick

-He doesn’t use it for show watching purposes but he
does fuck around with profile names and changes the pictures to piss Soda off mostly

-He changes the penguin to the Panda and it is a problem because Soda likes penguins and Pandas just aren’t the same

Johnny: 
-He watches the trendy shows and movies sometimes

-He takes Pony’s recommendations to heart because Pony loves this kinda thing so he figures Pony must know what he’s talking about

-He really likes Once Upon A Time

-And Raising Hope

-And literally any show that surrounds a group of friends because he relates to them for obvious reasons

-Okay but Gossip Girl is his shit

-The last profile has his name on it but the rest of boys share it

-Obsessed with Riverdale

-Pony didn’t fight with Johnny about using Netflix because he would tag along to movies before they got an account



Steve:
-Always pushed Darry to sign up for Hulu instead because they update faster and it’s the same price for no commercials as the 4 screen plan

-Helps Dally mess up the names

-Shamelessly watches whatever he wants

-Toddlers and Tiaras? Sure.

-My Little Pony? Yep.

-Cupcakes Wars? Hell yeah!

-Just no OITNB because that shit gets too crazy for him (RIP Dylan)

-Watches New Girl like it’s his religion

- He watched Family Guy and American Dad in the actual order they came out except for the first few seasons bc the quality/art style sucked

- He’s the type of person who need need needs to have something to snack on while he’s watching a show

-like he’ll plan it out or just save his food until he watches his show

-Laughed at Pony for spending all his time watching movies but now he never leaves his house because he’s binging shows

-They had the same conversation as the one with Two except Steve watched Wonder Woman seven times and once was with Sodapop who made him swear not to tell Pony

-But he’s a bitch so he exposed him when Soda refused to admit that Rainbow Dash is better than Pinky Pie

-Pony flipped

-Then Two came forward and it was a huge mess



This is for @maxisprettygay and @matt-dillon-trash

IM STILL SO MAD LIKE WHY DIDNT IT POST?? But at least it’s going up now

blacktofade  asked:

Stiles as a professional cuddler, where he offers a range of services, from spooning to hand holding to quiet murmuring. Also, there are a lot of health benefits from being cuddled regularly and Derek happens to be in need of said benefits ;__;

counting sheep don’t help me sleep

(a little fic i wrote for my friends around the holidays)

Kira is probably the closest thing to a friend Derek has at work, a relationship that has its positives and negatives. Derek doesn’t really go out of his way to make friends with his coworkers, preferring to keep his head down and get his work done, but it’s nice to eat lunch with someone, to have someone say “Have a good weekend!” even if all Derek’s doing that weekend is what he does every weekend: workout, go to the library, watch a new foreign film (last weekend’s was De grønne slagtere, and he hasn’t been able bring himself to eat meat since).

The bad thing about being friends with Kira is that the longer they know each other, the more comfortable they are in each other’s presence, the more Kira seems to feel like she’s got to look after Derek for some reason. Kira’s a pretty empathetic person anyway; all the ladies in the office like telling her their horror stories about dating because Kira makes the best horrified faces in reaction to their sordid tales, but she takes it a step further with Derek. And, to a certain extent, Derek doesn’t mind that much; Kira reminds him of Laura in some ways, the way she gently teases him about his diet, and leaves little notes on his desk about inconsequential things - but then she takes an interest in his well being: his mental  wellbeing.

Keep reading

Boyfriend!Jun

• your first impression of him was that he was a shy guy that really didn’t talk much considering the fact that he wasn’t fluent with his Korean yet aw poor cutie
• his first impression of you was “look at them, I wish I could talk to them but my Korean isn’t good enough,”
• basically you were one of the reasons why he pushed himself to learn Korean as fast as he could, no matter how difficult it was AW
• our little Junhui would have probably stayed up all night, practicing what he was gonna say when he asked you out the next day. he’d have his cue cards in front of him and he’d be saying it to the mirror and being a little cutie. it would be the last thought before he went to sleep and the first, when he wakes up.
• he pumped himself up, along with the help of the other members and SO thought he was ready to face you and just straight up ask. but nOPE when he saw you he completely forgot what he was going to say and had pull out his cue cards again and he kept fumbling with them and stuttering his words because you threw him off guard.
• “wen junhui… are you asking me out?”
• “I-I.. No, yes? Yes.”
• but you do say yes and he’s the happiest boy in the world and he gains so much confidence from that and stuff awe
• your first date with jun was in a fancy restaurant bc this boy wants to keep it classy. he’d take you to a real expensive restaurant and feed you the best food ever until your stuffed bUT THERES STILL DESSERT LEFT ! Then instead of getting something hella fancy, you guys just pigged out on ice cream, then some ice cream got stuck on your chin and jun just had to reach over and swipe his thumb over it and you DIED AND WEN JUNHUI JUSY SAT THERE WITH A SMUG LOOK ON HIS FACE LIKE YEA B FLUSTERED
• then since he’d want to keep things nice and stick to the classics, he’ll probably walk you to your house to make sure your safe and be all cute with you
• time for your first kiss !! your first kiss was absolutely adorable, like he was walking you home one day when he really wanted to tell you that he wanted to kiss you but wasn’t sure if he was saying it right in Korean, so he blurted it in Chinese and you just stood there confused and he had to grab a piece of paper and wrote it down for you and when you read it you got all blushy, then he got blushy and you all turned v red.
• but wen junhui still needed an answer so when you finally said yes he went straight for it.
• “ye-mmf.”
• CALLS U BABE BC THIS GUY IS COOL
• skinship with jun all day everyday fellas. touching your hand, touching your arm, touching your nose hE JUST HAS TO HAVE SOME SORT OF PHYSICAL CONTACT W U
• “jun is it really necessary to hold my hair like that?”
• “well, your hands are full so where else am I supposed to hold you?”
• he has a habit of overdressing for every occasion. sleeping - fancy satin pyjamas with eye mask, eating on a date - a suit and tie, going on a beach date - a suit and tie, going to a kids party - a suit and tie.
• JUNHUI LOVES EVERY KISS IN THE BOOK GUYS, IT DOESNT MATTER IF ITS ON THE NOSE OR ON THE LIPS HE’LL SWOON AND LOVE IT EITHER WAY
• same goes for hugs except he especially like those hugs where your smothered into his chest and sneaky hand reaches to your lower back ;))))) but only when you guys are at that comfortable phase, jun wouldn’t want to rush into things that would make you feel uncomfortable~
• when he wants your attention and affection he won’t be able to keep his hands to himself tbh, and he won’t be able to shut his mouth. he’d keep trying to distract you with his little cute pouts but you don’t buy any of it so you just keep going about your business lol
• “jagi, kiss me.”
• “yah, I’m busy, do it lat-”
• oh did I mention he likes to cut you off by kissing u?
• he also likes to eat food, like all the time. he’s always up for trying new food from all around the world, especially korean food. your dates would probably consist of going to those night markets where there’s food EVERYWHERE and you two pig out on EVERYTHJNG and it’s the cutest thing ever.
• however he dislikes not knowing enough Korean to be able to express himself in front of everyone,both on and off stage. you have to let him know that he’s still learning and it’s fine if it takes a while. you’ll love him all the same.
• he secretly gets all giddy whenever you initiate something bc when he initiates something he’s so confident but when you do it oh my goodness he’s so flustered and red it’s funny.
• has an addiction to you, not in a creepy way, but not in a way everyone else feels. he must know your whereabouts AT ALL TIMES and it doesn’t matter if he’s practicing or about to go on stage, he has to know where you are. BC WHAT IF YOU GOT HURT??????
• acts like he’s too cool for couple items tbh but really really lowkey wants to buy so,e bc wouldn’t that be cuTE.
• “jun, I know you want them.”
• jun would be quite intimidating when he’s jealous, I mean, this dude is legit - he knows martial arts, don’t mess w him! like when he sees someone flirting with you or taking things too for he’d have no problem coming up beside you and glaring at them with that terrifying glare of his with his hand clasped around yours until they get the picture and walk away.
• tbh you find it quite scary yourself when he’s like that.
• but the second they’re gone he goes back to his usual self as if nothing ever happened and your confused like ??
• I feel like what’ll get jun SUPER flustered is if you say something kind of seductive in his ear but IN CHINESE like he’ll melt to the ground in a pool of feels.
• his phone background is a photo minghao took, it was of you trying to copy some sort of martial arts move he was doing and failing miserably, but the smile on your face was too precious to delete.
• your phone background is a photo of him while he was extremely concentrated in learning korean, he didn’t even see you take the photo and was like WOAH when he unlocked your phone and saw the photo.
• one time you asked jun to teach you some choreography from mansae and you got confused hella fast and he just laughed and kissed your forehead bc aigoo your so stupid but he loves u.
• “one step at a time ok?”
• but when you finally learned how to do it YOU WOULDNT STOP AND JUNHUI WAS LIKE JAGI STOP PLEASE ITS ENOUGH FOR TODAY
• jun, being a dancer often takes his dancing too far and hurts himself really badly with sprained ankles, pulled muscles and things like that. and it really breaks your heart to see him come home in pain or having to sprint to the hospital because he was hurt.
• “i-i need to become better, jagiya.”
• but he’s always extremely thankful to have you take care of him whenever he needs it.
• he’d send you to sleep by wrapping you up in his arms tapping small rhythms on your skin until you fall asleep, then he’d stay up an extra hour or so until he’s certain your safe and then falls asleep himself.
• he would wake you up by blasting his music hella loud until you finally sat up and yelled at him to turn it down.
• “WEN JUNHUI WOULD YOU PLEASE LOWER THE VOLUME!”
• “lol good morning, my beautiful.”
• your first fight was pretty bad one since it got both you and jun upset. jun got too jealous one day and asked if you wanted to leave him for all the other people who wanted you, you got a little mad at his lack of trust in you and the argument resulted in you slamming the door and stomping away.
• you had pretty much thought that was the end for the two of you but was utterly surprised when the next couple of days he showed up at your door in his suit and tie OFC and held your hand tightly. he led you to like a boardwalk that was set up in a dinner style and there was a small orchestra with instruments and the music started to play and he asked if you wanted to dance AND YOU DANCED THE NIGHT AWAY
• after that he ended up apologising fifty thousand times.
• although jun looks mature and is one of the hyungs in the group, with you he’s a teenager again, getting weird strange feelings that he loves so much. he won’t tell you it often but amongst all the greasy pick up lines and smooth moves, he really, really loves you.
• “Shh, I bet you’re surprised
Of course, all your five senses are alive
Of course, I’ve entered your heart
Look at you look at you look at you.” - sexy junhui~