its h okay deal with it

jared telling you he has a daddy kink; headcannons

HEHEHEH YEA THIS WAS REQUESTED AND I COULDN’T RESIST (NSFW SMUTTY SHIT OBVIOUSLY)

LET’S GET TO IT;


-so first off, you tried to get some daddy kink action before he did

-you two are making out

-and he kisses your neck

-he finds your sweet spot and you just kinda accidentally let a tiny whimper of 

‘fuck, daddy’

-jared fucking loses his shit

 'oh mY FUCKING GOD, DID YOU JUST CALL ME DADDY Y/N?’

 -you’re so incredibly embarrassed, like you don’t think your face has ever been redder 

 -jared w i l l n o t s to p l a ug h i ng 

 -and you like swat him gently and mumble super childishly 

 'stop making fun of me' 

-he’s like

‘are you kidding me? you called me ‘daddy’ I will /never/ stop making fun of you about this, fuck i gotta tell connor. he’s gonna crack up’

-you shake your head rapidly

‘jared i swear to god if you tell anyone– its not even a big deal! just forget it ever happened, okay?!’

-he’s still laughing 

-you get up and walk out like 

‘fuck this shit, talk to me when you’re done acting like a 6 year old’

-jared calls after you through his laughter

‘n-no babe! come back. i’m not trying to kinkshame you– i mean i kinda am but,’

-you obviously come back a few minutes later after he’s chilled out but you can still see him holding back laughter

-it’s pretty chill for the rest of the night

-until, that is, you fall asleep

-so you’re cuddled into jared’s side fast asleep, and he’s laying awake, staring at the ceiling

-and he k e e p s thinking about your little whimper

-like he cannot stop

-and he’s sitting here trying to convince himself it’s because he thinks it’s funny

‘psh i would never be into that kind of thing’

-but he like shifts a little bit and then he notices he’s totally hard

-and he’s like,,,, o h

-does he get himself off on the thought of you calling him daddy?

-the world may never know

-the answer is yes

-he doesn’t say anything for a few days, like he doesn’t bring up the event at all

-it’s kinda weird to you because jared’s not the kinda guy to let go of a moment that embarrassing

-you thought he’d tease you about it for days

-one day he’s playing video games and you’re chilling on his bed with him

-he suddenly pauses the game and puts the controller down

‘y/n…’

-your heart like, stops

-he looks so serious and you are immediately concerned

‘j-jared is everything okay?’

‘yeah.. yeah. everything’s fine, there’s just been something i’ve wanted to tell you but i.. i don’t know how to say it. i just.. look..’

-you grab his hand and squeeze it reassuringly

‘you know you can tell me anything right?’

-he nods and takes a deep breath, using his free hand to push his glasses up and he mumbles so so quietly 

‘i think i have a daddy kink’

-you’re like

‘wait what?’

-he gets super frustrated and like almost yells

‘I HAVE A FUCKING DADDY KINK’

-you take a few moments before laughing hysterically

‘o-oh oh my god. that’s what you just got so serious about? oh my g o d’

-jared just pouts, burying his face in his hands

-you’re ready to give him s o m uc h s h i t

-’wait, im sorry kleinman, i actually don’t think I heard you correctly, could you just say that again? you have a /what/ kink?’

-’don’t be a dick, y/n. i blame this on you.’

‘i-i’m sorry, okay. god, oh my god. i can’t believe you.’

-he’s like super embarrassed so you go up to him and kiss his cheek and you’re like

‘hey, it’s okay. i don’t mind at all. honestly, im glad’ 

-he doesn’t respond because he’s still like dying inside

-so yo start to like kiss his face

-and mumble about how much you love him

-he mumbles back

‘i love you too’

-you start kissing his neck and he kinda puts his hand in your hair and you just

‘fuck me, daddy’

-and he l o s e s it again, but in a good way

-like he just gets so dom

-o h m y g o d

-like he’s pinning you down

‘if you insist, babygirl’

-fuccccccccc

-alriiighty boys im done here

anonymous asked:

i don't know much about falsettos, why is it bad that people are hcing marvin's last name as feldman? (does he not have a last name?)

no he doesnt !! the only people in falsettos w canon last names r whizzer nd mendel ( brown nd weisenbachfeld , respectively )

nd like .. ok so the whole thing w marvin feldman started bc theres a man on the aids quilt named marvin feldman nd mayb im makin a way too big a deal of this but i personally find it R L Y disrespectful to the memory of the actual man

nd to add insult to injury the aids quilt was made IN H O N O R of marvin feldman like idk why the falsettos fandom thinks its OKAY to hc marvs last name as that is if he were that person the aids quilt was made for , as if marvin feldman werent a real gay man who died of aids like ……… yall jst b creative. come up w a name that isnt LITERALLY replacing a fictional char w a real man who died like ??

there r so many last names out there. use a fucking generator if yre that desperate fr one fr marvin good l-rd

anonymous asked:

Okay, so, I just discovered your chansaw tropes fic and my gay ass is dying, like goddamn that's some good shit right there. I was wondering if you'd be willing to do one where it's like they're all drunk and Mac accidently lets it slip that Duke had a crush on Veronica in the second grade, but she didn't know how to deal with it so she just left her a note that said "Get out of my school" one day. Then Chandler is just like, "The fuck? You trying to steal my girl bitch?"

im fucking screaming oh h my god


“Duke liked you,” Mac screeches- her eyes are alight with an unholy sort of glee, and Duke hits her square in the face with a pillow. 

“She’s lying,” she says immediately. “She’s a liar, she’s lying-” 

“In second grade!” the words are muffled by the pillow, and she peels it off her face. “And she wrote you a note-” 

“She’s lying!” Desperation enters Duke’s tone, and Heather’s eyes narrow. 

“-telling her to ‘get out of her school’ because she didn’t know how to deal with it-” 

Veronica lets out a loud, braying sort of laugh, totally caught by surprise. “Oh my god, that was you? I fucking-” 

Heather’s eyes narrow even further- they’re a little glazed with alcohol, but still sharp as knives. “Excuse me?” 

Duke pales. “Listen. Listen-” 

Veronica takes Heather’s hand, peppering it with little kisses. It doesn’t dull the shocked offense in Heather’s eyes. 

“Listen,” Duke tries again desperately, only to be cut off by McNamara launching herself across the floor to land in her lap. 

“She was in love,” she sing songs. “In love with Veronica, a little gay baby, she-”

Heather whines with unprecedented strength. “I can’t believe you fucking- tried to steal Veronica when you were a baby,” she says, sounding injured. “You- fuck you, you’re off the team-” 

“Heather, baby, you’ve had a little much to drink,” Veronica says gently, trying to pries the vodka bottle from Heather’s hand. She gesticulates wildly with the vodka hand, and Veronica gives up. 

“Off the team and right the fuck out of my heart!” 

“It was second grade,” Duke says helplessly. It’s no use. Heather doesn’t talk to her for a week. 

The Hogwarts Houses

TRUE STORY

*Gryffindor scrolling through Instagram feed* 

Gryffindor: Fuck Trump.

Everyone:

Gryffindor:

Everyone: *Shocked* D-Did you…?

Gryffindor:*Shocked* Did I…..? Did I just say the f-word…?

*Ravenclaw rolls eyes* 

Ravenclaw: Oh come on, it’s no big deal. There was always gonna a be day your mouth would lose its virginity. 

Gryffindor: *Terrified* H-How could I-I?

(Hufflepuff pats Gryffindor’s back.) 

Hufflepuff: It’s okay, the word just seems to slip out- hey, it’s alright.

Gryffindor: Oh God, I’m sorry-

*Slytherin looks up from the book they’re reading*

*Slytherin wordlessly moves closer.*

Slytherin: I feel no attraction to you but-

*Slytherin leans in and kisses Gryffindor on the mouth.*

Slytherin: I’m proud of you. 

anonymous asked:

(First did you get my other immortal headcanon thing? I don't remember if I sent it or not) but did u know Hephaestus has a kid named Ephume who's the god of well-spokenness AND IS THAT NOT JARVIS OR WHAT?! (Also the whole deal with being cast down from Olympus...) just the role of Hephaestus fits him Very Well. (Tree)

 U H  H H H CAN I GET A GOd Tony Stark please

WOAH A ACTUAL IMAGINE

Brother/sibling AU Suggested by anonymous (I actually like this idea and think its cute :3) ALSO I’M TRYING TO CATCH UP ON IMAGINES BEAR WITH ME -Mod kiiiiiiiiiib

Saihara

-the one person who he’s not afraid to talk to is you
-It’s more of you teasing him then him teasing you
-Calls you Rose because your forever his brother untill you last petal drops
-You love embarrassing him so much
-Always finds a way to bring him up in conversation to embarrass him
-Very lenient with your love life but not with his
-S a v e H i m
-He really annoys you but not in the way about like teasing or such
-It’s the fact that he likes all these people but he dosesnt know who to choose
-tbh you were totally okay with helping him but he is so naive
-He thinks that none of them like him back
-*C H O K E S*
-you show him a meme every time you bring it up it’s the -ArE YoU SuRE AbOUt ThAT!- meme
-so confused
-please help your brother and his love life

Ouma

-“short stack”
-“grape juice”
-*gasp*
-“YOU TAKE THAT BACK!”
-always fighting and teasing each other because they are both short dorks
-both will prank each other and have prank wars that last over a week
-longest was at least half of the school year
-always needs some else to shut them up
-probably Tenko or Toujo
-Even though they mostly fight, they do get along on rare occasions  
-they both bother Kiibo about his maybe robo dong
-Ouma is very protective of you even when your simply taking with anyone
-the “ you must be at least 3ft away from all guys except me because I’m your older brother and thats that” dude
-basically is the annoying short dork over protective brother

Amami

-HE LOVES TALKING ABOUT YOU
-Always tries to tell people about embarrassing stories about you when you were younger
-he’s like the mom who has embarrassing photos but instead of a album they are his phone
-he loves holding you and it honestly makes you feel safe in his arms
-your very open with each other and don’t hide it often
-He always calls you nicknames of beautiful things because he thinks he has the prettiest/handsomest younger sibling
-sometimes you call him amomi because he’s basically your mom but in your brothers body
-S O P R O T E C T I VE
-if you think ouma is bad
-you have not seen Amami
-he will literally drag you away and ask is they are your s/o
-E V E R Y T I M E
-the only thing that annoys you about your brother
-basically the embarrassing momma brother

Kaito

-Hehehehe
-He likes to pull few subtle pranks on you
-You don’t get back at him because well
-You don’t know how
-So you ask Ouma…. and well
-Let’s just say he stopped
-For good
-He loves seeing you happy and you love his cooking
-He just looks at you and just saysss awww
-It’s creepy sometimes but you know it’s not meant to be taken in the wrong way
-“ Hey you wanna piggy back ride? ”
-“ were in high school plus I can walk ”
-“ buuuuttttt rocket~”
-Did I forget to mention he likes to call you rocket as you nick name
-“… fine”
-He’s also super lenient when it comes to talking with guys but does get a little anxious when they start getting a little too close
-Lenient star brother

Korekiyo

-Adores you
-He calls you ladybug a lot because he feels like he’s lucky to have you in his life
-Loves doing your hair if it’s long enough and you do the same
-You get him lots of ancient folk lore stories to read to him
-Does not let anyone near you in fright they will ruin your innocence like they did to him
-One day he lets you do his make up
-hhehehe
-You had fun
-He honestly secretly likes it
-One day though
-He tries to do his own makeup
-He’s actually god with makeup but is super bad with eyliner
-Oh dear
-He stabs him self with the eyeliner at least three times
-“ WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME! ”
-“ I DO BUT YOUR DOING IT TOTALLY WRONG AND YOU LOOK LIKE A FUCKING DEPRESSED DRUNK GIRL THE MORNING AFTER”
-“ LANGUAGE! ”
-For now on he’s not allowed to do his eyeliner on his own

Kiibo

-Petty puns are a must in this bond
-Everyone hates them but you love them
-He’s protective but not as bad as Ouma or Amami
-A L S O
-Doesn’t call you nicknames often, but when he does its mostly muffin or cupcake
-He will cook you meals and omg
-He makes the B E S T  sweets
-Loves to See you happy and gushing over food
-Silly but adorable
-Even if it means to get messy making food
-though they do have their cooking moments
-“WHY DID YOU PUT TWO DROPS OF GREEN ?!”
-“I THOUGHT IT WOULD MATCH MORE WITH THE COLOR SCHEME!”
-“ WHAT COLOR SCHEME?!?!? WERE MAKING CUPCAKES NOT COLOR PALETTES !”
-Only Kiibo was allowed to cook cupcakes for now on now…
-B E S T C O O K B R O A P R O N he wears sometimes
-Most likely a gift You had made for him
-I will fight anyone who says he doesn’t wear a best cook bro apron

Gonta

-Most people would think he’s the nicest brother
-hah lol no
-Doesn’t call you nicknames because he thinks your name is easy enough to say
-Protective but like Kiibo not as much and little to no effort put into protecting them.
-He actually finds you extremely annoying
-especially when he’s doing his ‘work’
-Only likes you when you leave the poor innocent boy alone
-Will fight you
-You win most times
-He always says he lets you win because he’s a gentleman
-T R I G G E R E D B A B S
-Will fight for hours on ends
-Rant about how much you hate each other
-Everyone thinks you guys fake it when you really don’t
-Totally do pranks on him and make him super embarrassed
-He doesn’t do pranks but he does embarrass the fuck out of you if you piss him off enough
-Rarely bond like Ouma but when they do they don’t talk much
-Just help these two babs
- s a v e t h e m

Hoshi

-“short stack”
-“ L I S T E N H E R E B U K K O “
-Calls you ‘bukko’ a lot
-Hates your short jokes because they are just so C R I N G Y
-Still loves you though
-Likes to see you happy and smiling
-If you’re lucky he’ll joke back
-You love to play tennis with him
-If you’re lucky you’ll win
-B u t
-Having to deal with a sore loser brother is s a d
-Also
-They are v e r y open with each other
-Don’t care if its really gross or not
-“ I have to take a shit i’ll be right back”
-“ok but make sure to wipe your ass”
-“…”
-“what?”
-Okay maybe they can be a little too personal
-H O S H I
-I S
-V e r y P r o t e c t i v e
-He doesn’t like it when people hit on you
-Like
-At all
-Will fight anyone who dare toughest his sis
-He is a secret Tiger Mom

Hope you enjoy! ^^ 

  • *People are disrespecting the requests of the Standing Rock water protectors by refusing to help with chores around the camp, refusing to clean up after themselves, coming to the camp dressed up in stereotypical Native attire, taking photographs in areas that are off limits, and disrespecting the ceremonies, culture, and land, bringing drugs. So much so that the Standing Rock water protectors have released statements on the matter and listed guidelines on their websites on how to be respectful ON THEIR FUCKING LAND and quit treating it like Coachella Music Festival.*
  • Some asshole: Okay but at least they are there! Who cares what they're doing on the land as long as they are there showing solidarity! Let them get high and dress up, it's not that big of a deal.
  • Me: Shut up.
  • Danny: Wait, Cookie-Puss is Carvel...!
  • Arin: ...cARVEL! I knew it! See i knew it! I fucking led in with like, 'Oh maybe its not Baskin Robbins...'
  • Arin: oKAY, Carvel- FUCK YOU Baskin Robbins!
  • Danny: *giggles*
  • Arin: Carvel! If you wanna deal with us- Baskin Robbins!!! Cumming on my face is still on the table-
  • Danny: *LAUGHS*
  • Danny: Wow, i cant believe you went from offering to have someone like, nut on your face to 'no, you instead!'
  • Danny: You w h o r e, Arin
  • Arin: No! Baskin Robbins can still cum all over my face if they want to :3c

anonymous asked:

may I request an gif of infinite & bts scenario where they didn't know you were scared of heights but they brought you to a place high up ( and because of your phobia you started crying? ). ( sorry if it's confusing haha ) love your blog 💓

INFINITE

Sunggyu: “Oh c’mon it’s no big deal, just try not to look down that’s all””

Dongwoo: *Seeing you crying * *confused* “W-Why? W-what’s wrong babe?”

Woohyun:  “You don’t have to be scared. just keep looking at me okay?”

Hoya: “Aiiish.. Y-You’re scared of h-heights? I d-didn’t know”

Sungyeol: *He would be scared as shit as well* “OMMAAAA I shouldn’t get in this stupid gameeee”

L: *Tries to distract you* “Hey hey , the food is really good isn’t? Don’t blame later when i finish it all , comoe on eatI”

Sungjong:  “I’m here with you now, there is nothing to fear.”


BTS

Jin:  “It’s not so bad.. Here take a look, i’ll be holding you, don’t worry’ *Tries to make you overcome your phobia”

Suga: *Thinking* “Oh shit what am i gonna do now to stop her from crying”

JHope: “OMG ME TOOOOO ! Why you didn’t me before , i wouldn’t be riding this stupid game in the first place”

Rap Monster: “And you tell me that NOW?? After we’re already up?”

Jimin: “Heyy look at me , i’m here by you side and i’m not gonna let anything bad happens to you so don’t worry”

V: *Hugs you* “Hey stop crying i’m with you here”

JungKook:  “Don’t worry, baby. I’ve got you.”

as always, gifs are not mine. Cr. to owners
-Emma

anonymous asked:

Interesting Niall hasn't posted anything yet. It's almost as if the plan was for for the focus to be on H/L for a bit, as the GossipCop article demonstrates.

It is interesting, and honestly I’m okay with that. If Niall tweets and Liam doesn’t it would make Liam’s absence more noticeable, especially in light of his new solo deal. But much like the way when Harry is unable (for whatever reason) to participate, they tend to only have two others involved, this may be a Liam cover since he said what he wanted to say on Thursday and doesn’t want to push it.

But there are six hours left in the day in the UK, so there’s still time :)