its been a weird day ok

50% OFF Starters pt 2
  • "If you continue your attempts at flirting, I will be forced to take DRASTIC measures."
  • "I like watching you from behind."
  • "Stunning deduction sherlock."
  • *demonic voice* "by the darkest sun that casts its menacing rays of the furthest madness, we sense your intentions, (name). the gibbering of mad cultists whisper wicked words to temporal winds, they inform us that you are not to be trusted. Usurper. Usurper."
  • "USURPER!"
  • "I've heard a lot about you and your extensive collection of tank tops, like I'm thinking about getting like 10 more."
  • "Calm down little dude."
  • "the fear of drowning is a primal one. it's a feeling of helplessness, of losing all control. struggling against an inevitable fate as your lungs fill with water..."
  • "I don't need a piece of paper to tell me how to swim or how to fuck Dean Winchester."
  • "You know I had a dream like this once, you surprisingly had more clothes on, though, at least at the start."
  • "ten bucks says he dies."
  • "I'm gonna go run my feelings off."
  • "Yeah it didn't work out... for them."
  • "I have to go scream confusing, end-of-the-world ramblings at people under the freeway."
  • "I feel like I should argue this, but the potential for implied sexual antics is far too appealing."
  • "do not be alarmed! I am about to be hilarious."
  • "Maybe you should stop dragging me to these rap battles then!"
  • "I WANT YOU TO SHARE THE THINGS IN MY LIFE THAT ARE IMPORTANT TO ME!"
  • "I was under the impression there would be implied sexual antics, time to take matters into my own hands!"
  • "This feels a little exploitative."
  • "I need a soda. Or therapy. Probably both."
  • "Yeah it started because K-pop concert security is tougher than it looks but I just got hooked on the feeling of crushing someones face in with a solid right cross."
  • "sHHSHHshhshhhhh shut up shut up! shh I SMELL BOYS BEING GAY."
  • "Excuse me I am trying to scream my feelings into your mouth!"
  • "That wasn't hot... it was just fucking weird..."
  • "It's not what I would have you in, but I do appreciate beauty in all its many forms. mostly that cute booty though."
  • "hey, the heart wants what the heart wants."
  • "It may be hard to believe, but recently I lost the ability to read."
  • "Just because you can't read the words, doesn't mean you can't enjoy the book in a different way."
  • "boom! done. advice over. let's go get shitfaced!"
  • "Alright I brought the bitch-board for (name)."
  • "Alright let's call it what it is, a sissy paddle."
  • "calm down (name) we weren't talking about your internet search history."
  • "MY SWEET BABY SWAM!"
  • "didn't we make a pact to stop her from doing this weeb shit?"
  • "this better not be anymore or (name)'s weird porn!"
  • "Please call the police, because I look so good in this it should be against the law! uh, don't actually call the police though, I WILL incriminate all of you."
  • "Yeah but didn't they train on those islands where all those teenagers were killed? ...and those witch burnings happened? ...and all that toxic waste was spilled?"
  • "if you die, I get fired and I like this job. people don't ask questions here."
  • "fish-men walk among us. conquerers of land, BORN FROM THE OCEAN--"
  • "I don't need him to make weird pornography, I have prawns for that."
  • "Finally moving out, son? I'd like to say it's been fun. I'd like to. But I won't."
  • "hey check me out! I'm on a bout!"
  • "Sit down and stop making 2009 references!"
  • "nah, I scream enough at the unforgiving void of space."
  • "DON'T STEAL MY BONES!"
  • "You know, the ocean goblin? He lives in the ocean and if you don't brush your teeth he steals your bones."
  • "Ok I'm done for the day. If anyone needs me I'm gonna be in the tent looking at weird porn."
  • "Hey, you miss every ball you don't hit."
  • "You say 'you people' like you're not part of the family. I've got some news for you, you're already on the christmas card."
  • "You think these antics would fly at the german club?"
  • "brush your teeth, kid."
  • "Can you hear it? the ocean... it wants blood."
  • "I'm the best damn shot we've got."
  • "You know, when I was a kid, before my dad got hit by that train, he said, '(name) don't let your friends swim out into the ocean and get stranded on the haunted island of camp kill-a-teen.' and here we are... stranded on the... haunted island of camp kill-a-teen..."
  • "that's fair."
  • "hey tweedle-dee and tweedle-dumbass!"
  • "It's fine, baby, if you get scared you can squeeze my hand."
  • "now let's make like scooby-doo and split up to find a clue."
  • "In 1991 a case was discovered where a man had the remains of over fifteen victims hidden in his apartment, over 40% of which were stored within his refrigerator. do you know how unsanitary that is?"
  • "you're so cute when you never shut up. Now shut up."
  • "all hail decision cube!"
  • "that's when you started walking on the wild side, right?"
  • "I AM NOT SOME PETTY CRIMINAL!"
  • "Does anyone want to hear my tragic backstory?"
  • "Bed? But what about possible axe-murderers?"
  • "And we solved the curse of the island, and realized that the real axe murderer was love, all along."
  • "It was a good night for all of us, let's spend more nights in abandoned lighthouses."
  • "That hottie from the track team is here and I wanna ask politely is he wants to get rowdy in the back of my dad's Prius."
  • "YOU CAN'T CATCH ME GAY THOUGHTS"

WE HAVE BEEN BLESSED ON THIS MOTHERFUCKIN DAY

anonymous asked:

You should write the robot au. Please.

i’m just saying that scott likes to fix things. he has an etsy profile: send him your computer, your phone, your mini-droid, and he will fix it and send it back. he even cleans them. he’s never had an unhappy customer.

these particular robots, the ST1 line, they’re unsettlingly realistic. their flesh is synthetic, but it functions like real skin; so when he finds this thing, it’s bruised, bleeding, and shut down in the alley between apartments. scott thinks he’s just a person at first, and rushes to him to see if he’s ok. face lolling between scott’s palms, it says, unnaturally slow, “battery… low.” so scott scoops it up and hefts it home.

his roommate’s not pleased. he’s like, “we don’t have enough room for this. you’d better keep it in your room.”

so scott ignores him, of course; he pays just as much rent as derek does, and he’s not gonna take no orders. it takes a couple days to track down a charger for the thing - the latest version is the ST1-LE8, and those have the nutrients-from-organic-food and solar capabilities - so in the meantime he does keep it in the storage room because it looks like a corpse and it’s super creepy. but he does find a cord adapter at a radio shack going-out-of-business sale. he drags the unit into the living room to plug it in, because all the plugs in his room are taken or behind furniture. the first thing the ST1 says when it starts back up is a very expressive, “ow.”

scott’s worked with these robots before. they’re not very popular, not next to the ones out by hp and apple, which have cleaner lines - they’re clearly not human, so they don’t creep you the fuck out - but he has still worked with an ST1 before. they’re not like that. they just look human; they don’t act it. in fact, they’re usually pretty buggy and weird. they’re basically like the cricket flip phone of the robot world. he thinks this one’s been tampered with. still, scott’s a sweet guy in general and he instinctively responds as if it were a person. “you ok?”

the thing grimaces, shakes its head, as if to dispel grogginess. “what day is it.”

“tuesday,” scott answers, “march 7th.” the thing nods slowly. “did someone try to fuck you?” people do that. try to fuck their robots. if they’re not designed for it, it’ll fuck up all their innards, and you have to open them up and clean them out. it’s super gross, but scott’s done it before.

“god, i wish,” the unit tells him. scott snorts unexpectedly. “ummm, my arm doesn’t work.”

“yeah, i got you,” says scott. “you want me to shut you down while i fix it or are you good?”

the thing looks at him, a little puzzled, a little intrigued. “i’m good,” it says. it glances over scott’s shoulder; scott twists around to see what he’s looking at. it’s his roommate, derek. “are you just eating dry granola?” the unit asks incredulously.

“do you have some diet questioning app installed?” derek returns aridly.

“you’re not even gonna throw some milk on there? a strawberry? nothin’?” derek doesn’t reply; he just takes a bite of granola. “humans are so… stupid,” the thing mutters, watching scott start to dismantle his arm. “no offense,” it adds.

scott smirks at him. he’s got bright brown eyes, dark circles under them. “none taken,” scott says.

kinda out of nowhere but a couple of weeks ago i downloaded this app called Daylio that works as a very simplified diary where you can write down your mood/emotions during the day from incredible to horrible and you only have to click on an emoji and the activity you were doing (you can add some too) and it’s been really helpful with dealing with my anxiety.
It helps putting things into perpective because even when I have a bad day/night I can check and see that I felt better a few days earlier and that It will happen again (and have the stats so my paranoid ass can believe that!) So yeah it’s been really helpful I don’t really know how to explain it well but I love it so far

hey everyone it’s time for sleepover type stuff:

  • tell me scary stories!!
  • ask for advice
  • writing prompts
  • funny/embarrassing stories (tell me yours or ask for mine)
  • talk abt ur crush/friends/family/pets
  • fmk/would you rather/have you ever/all that weird stuff
  • top 5/this or that/ etc
  • headcanons
  • questions abt me in general
  • bad jokes
  • positive messages
  • playlist/graphics requests
  • secrets or confessions (i wont publish if u start and end the message with **)
Just in case you don't already know

It’s ok fail.

Really it is.

I know it seems weird, and failing is obviously bad, but it’s ok.

Failure gives you the option to learn, and you should seize that opportunity. Failing is not the end all be all, okay?

Take it from your most recent failure, cuz even the most unlikely fail sometimes too.

thereal-queenk  asked:

May 12th is Markistar day, I can't believe it's been almost (over?) a year since I joined tumblr and this community

THAT’S SO CRAZY

ok tho I think on May 12th we should all change our icons to markistar as a celebration of its birth

((is it weird im more excited for that than my own birthday on May 5th lmfao))

ok i’m not usually like this but tomorrow i make the biggest presentation of my school career and i’m also 4 away from my next hundred… so waking up to see i’ve reached that goal might make me feel a little more confident about this whole thesis presentation thing lol

anonymous asked:

hey i hope you've had a great day. how are you feeling?

hey, this is so sweet. thank you for caring, for asking. I am so tired. i came home at around 5am this morning after dancing and raving eccentrically for many hours after a full day at work and then also had work today and i am exhausted, my knees are sore and I have been thinking a lot about life. Since i started working full-time, i rarely have time to breathe. But I am glad to be working, but its not easy. It kinda feels pointless, i am confused. its weird, this whole purposeful -purposelessness i feel. when i am at work i have purpose, but also..what am I doing. all this energy going into working, but what for? it seems so silly. I am not living. Its strange. but I know its realistic. life isn’t joyously lazing around as the sun goes down day in day out, I know this. it will be ok somehow. It will. I also had a weird meeting with someone. its a long story. I need to sleep, very tired. i hope you are well, I hope you are feeling very well. all my love xxxx

<3

Life has been so weird for me these past few days. My grandmas health has gotten really bad suddenly and as a Jehovah’s Witness she refuses to seek much medical help other than getting tests done that have only confirmed that she is very likely to have lung cancer (we’ll know for sure in a few days) and we’ve known for a year now that she has stage 3 kidney failure and she won’t do much to treat that either. She’s 86, has always been so active and healthy, and now shes suddenly having balance and serious comprehension issues. Shes living with my mom & I now so we can keep a constant eye on her. Her doctor has said that if she refuses to go to the hospital that we need to keep an eye on her and that if she suddenly starts feeling numbness anywhere or is falling over etc. that we absolutely have to take her to the hospital. If it was my choice she would of been there a long time ago. But we have to respect her beliefs and wishes, and at least her doctor treats mostly Jehovah’s Witnesses so he can give us the right advice for her sake. Its all just so scary and sad and I’m doing my very best to keep it together. And so is my mom. So much is about to change for my family.

And my dog who has nasal cancer is starting to get worse. Her time will be coming soon..

At least the good things in my life are truly so so good. I have a decent job and make decent money, I’m working in gardens on the side, my own garden will be coming together soon an I know I have plenty to look forward to. But this past week has thrown so much random bs at me that I wasn’t quite ready for, but life doesn’t care if you think you’re ready, it decides for you and forces you to grow. So I will grow, I will be strong for my family and I will love with every fiber of my being, no matter how much the reality of death hurts. Life is an opportunity to love and I won’t take it for granted.

what i wish i’d been told in recovery

- yes, it is normal for your tummy to look like that
- no, it wont last forever
- yes, it may last for months
- being swollen everywhere is painful, but the more you eat the sooner it goes away
- its ok to be hungry a lot, as long as you eat
- hot chocolate solves everything
- your body will make weird noises. laugh about it
- secrecy is the eds work. tell everyone what youre doing. theyll be happy to see you alive
- dress to what you like, not how you look
- there are easy days and bad days. one does not mean you will never see the other again
- find something you love, and devote your free time to it. something away from food and physical appearance
- crying over everything is ok
- hug everyone
- say hi to more people
- you look beautiful
-its ok
- youre ok

anonymous asked:

Hello, this may be a little weird but i'm kin with Huey and i just wanted to apologize for being shitty in canon. I'm only on anon because ,well, why not? However, constantly making jokes about killing me isn't cool, especially since you're kin with Hal. I don't want to see your rude jokes in my tag.

ok this has been sitting in my inbox for about. 5 days maybe and its starting to stink like you know when you have rotten food in your fridge? its like this but everytime i open tumblr theres the stink of rot wafting into my nose so i gotta get rid of this

  • what she says: im fine
  • what she means: stephanie brown's death was horribly handled by dc. her physical death was essentially torture porn, and was disgustingly sexist. it was then mostly referenced in by bruce in the future to further add to his man pain. cass, who was her best friend, wasnt shown mourning at all. she was tim's girlfriend for may years in the comics, the most prominent character in his solo series besides tim himself, and had been there since the beginning. tim, the same person who actually tried to clone kon when he died, had virtually no reaction to it. and on top of all of this, she had no memorial in the batcave. and, one of the only good things to come out of it, her character development (as well as others') was completely destroyed when the new 52 erased her all her character development after waiting several years to add her to the reboot. in conclusion, it's been twelve (12) years and im still very bitter

random pet peeve but i can’t stand when people say harry doesn’t tweet because of annoying fans like newsflash his fans have been annoying since day 1. the only difference between his social media use then and now is that he was most likely contractually obligated to tweet and now he just doesn’t feel the need to force himself to tweet about stuff not related to his music

May 10th, 2014. 

ribcagekitten replied to your post “did i tell you guys im 99.9% sure i like indirectly…”

Tell me the details!

omg so on facebook im friends with this dude who seemed super chill at first

but then he started doing that weird furry rp shit like “-nuzzles u- :3″ COMPLETELY UNIRONICALLY

and at first i was just like “haha ok dudes a little weird but yknow its whatever” so he would talk to me every few days and it always just kinda delved into “gimme da snuggles :3″ and usually i’d stop replying after it stopped being mildly amusing

and it slowly became like “-touches da booty- -w-” which is weirD but i would try to brush it off, i’ve been friends with all sorts of weebs thats just what they do

and eventually he like

actually invited me over to his fucking house at 10 pm cause he was like “ill exchange da cerealz for butt touches :3″ and that was kinda my Time To Never Reply Again thing cause this dude is at least in his late 20s and im pretty sure none of his weird furry snuggle shit was platonic at this point?????

so Hanadoki happens

im All Fucking Over con husbando 

and i notice he stops trying to message me

and instead hes just been posting like

angsty lyrics and vague posts and shit like that and i am lIVING for it

and lowkey im hoping i can have like one final ‘fuck off’ if he messages me again so i can be like “YEAH I BASICALLY MET MY CON HUSBANDO HES SO CUTE I LOVE HIM I WOULD GIVE HIM -butt touches :3 IF HE REALLY WANTED I MEAN-”