its barely anything but it is a thing and it is my thing!!


I would turn the sink on, and close my eyes, and I would pretend that I was under water. That I was floating in a pool or something at the bottom. It was all quiet, just floating there and couldn’t hear anything. No one could get to me. No one could touch me. I was safe. Did it make things better? No, but it made me forget how bad things were.

some doodles with a trio of dresses i found in my massive fashion folder

anonymous asked:

Namseok - confession or firsts

Rule Number One of How to Lead A Band : Don’t fall for one of your band members.

✘ ~900 words, NamSeok x firsts, Idolverse AU

If Namjoon is honest, it’s not like he didn’t see it coming entirely.

“It’s always your decision, of course,” Seokjin sighs.

It’s 2 AM after all, and the seven of them are barely keeping their eyes open on the elevator. It’s their eighth concert venue abroad (they’re somewhere in the States, but Namjoon has lost track after Chicago) and the hotel rooms are two minutes away. More specifically, the beds are.

Namjoon doesn’t care for arrangements, really.

“Three of you,” Namjoon points to Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook, “can room together.”

There’s a hum of agreement but no one says anything. Jungkook looks like he’s asleep on Taehyung’s shoulder standing up.

“I call dibs on Jin hyung,” Yoongi grunts and no one argues. It’s the way thing are.

“So that leaves me and you,” Namjoon says, turning to Hoseok and Hoseok is already looking at him, a small smile on his lips as he nods once. There’s a touch on his elbow and it’s Hoseok, and Namjoon’s heart skips something he won’t put into words because he’s tired. Hoseok is just clingy when he’s tired.

Namjoon saw this coming, of course.

They aren’t through until much later though. From experience (‘leader duties’ Yoongi calls it), Namjoon knew it wasn’t going to be. There’s luggage to be distributed, showers after long flights that each of the kids have to be forced into, the random burst of energy on picking beds that Namjoon sorts out. By the time he’s back in his own room, Namjoon knows it’s past 3 AM. It’s instinctive, but also because Hoseok points it out when Namjoon switches off the lights.

“You could’ve handed out schedules tomorrow, you know,” Hoseok grins sleepily, cross legged on his own bed.

“Technically, it’s already tomorrow,” Namjoon points out and Hoseok laughs even though Namjoon hasn’t really said anything funny. Maybe it’s because Hoseok is always smiling (Namjoon wants to imagine it’s usually around Namjoon. Or he doesn’t. Or something.), or maybe Hoseok is tired to the point of derision, but it sets off that warm feeling at the pit of Namjoon’s stomach.

Which sucks, because this Hoseok. And he’s Namjoon. And he’s stating the obvious all over again but nothing good can come of liking your own band member.

That’s got to be rule number one on How To Lead Your Band.

So Namjoon shrugs and falls into his own bed and he watches Hoseok sink back into his and text his dad goodnight, a ritual he’s managed to keep (well okay, he tries his best and if you’re three continents and twelve timezones away and text goodnight to your dad, it’s the best it gets, since Namjoon knows the niggling regret of never doing the same). Namjoon could close his eyes and still know what Hoseok was up to.

There’s things Namjoon doesn’t see coming though.

“Can I sleep with you?” Hoseok whispers just as Namjoon draws the covers over himself and calls it a day. He’s aching to sleep, aching to not think about this, or Hoseok next to him, or Hoseok’s breath on his skin, or Hoseok in general.

“Sure,” Namjoon says, voice hoarse and a second later, the bed shifts and Hoseok slips next to Namjoon. He’s colder than Namjoon had imagined, and he has to resist the urge to pull the covers over Hoseok to prevent seeming weirdly overprotective.

“Hey, come here,” Hoseok murmurs, shifting closer to Namjoon, eyes only half open. Namjoon freezes when arms and legs are draped over Namjoon’s torso and their faces are inches apart and this is new and Namjoon feels like he’s back in their old dorms in their trainee days, when he was as new to the leader thing as the rest of them were at the band thing and Namjoon didn’t know what to do when the kids fought or eyeliners were lost or how much longer dance practice was going to last.

He doesn’t know what to do at all.

It’s the first time Hoseok slips his fingers into Namjoon’s under the sheets in the dark.

The first time Hoseok plants a soft kiss on Namjoon’s forehead with closed eyes and buries his head into the crook in Namjoon’s neck.

The first time he whispers ‘you’re breathing really hard’ and ‘get some sleep’ and ‘goodnight’ all in one breath.

The first time they’re so close that it’s ages after Hoseok has slept and Namjoon is finally tired of counting his heartbeats on his fingertips when his eyes finally close.

If there’s a list of things Namjoon doesn’t see coming, it’s all those firsts and the alarm that rings after what seems like seconds after Namjoon’s eyes have finally fluttered shut.

“I can’t believe you’re still asleep,” Hoseok grins twenty minutes later, already showered and ready, and Namjoon can tell he remembers last night and he can tell Hoseok doesn’t regret a thing.

It’s about the only thing that finally gets him up. He really shouldn’t let Hoseok be the only reason he gets out of bed when the days are long, really.

That’s got to be rule number one on How To Lead Your Band.

Luckily, Namjoon hasn’t read the rulebook for a while now. He’ll pretend he doesn’t know while he can.

For @cyphermon

Admin! :D

Hey guys! I’m JesterSinsanity, one of the other new admins to BSP. Feel free to call me Jester or Andy as I’ll answer to both. :3 Anyway, here are a few things you guys should know about me right off the bat; I’m 17, almost finished with my junior year in high school- part of the Whitesboro High School Band (Whitesboro, TX if any of you wanna look it up.) as a Clarinet. So y’all are gonna hear alot about random woodwind shenanigans many consisting on certain members of my section. I’ll be on here when I can, as school reaching its peak point of Hell atm (as in Testing. -.- XP) But feel free to ask anything in you wanna know more. 

I’m really glad to be a part of this but also super new to admining a page so bare with me as I sort things out. ^.^

Originally posted by nicorobin

  • what she says: i'm fine
  • what she she really means: why is it that when people notice a camel toe they call a girl out for it but if a guy wears tight pants and his dick is practically bulging out of his pants no one calls him out for it? this is an issue of sexism that must be dealt with at once. also, with the skinny tight style of clothing do people still even if care if anything shows? cause if not, then why do i have uncomfortably wrap something around my waist to hide something that is barely even seen until it's noticed? lastly, people judge those who wear such clothing but shouldn't they be judged as well for taking notice of such things? cause it's actually rude to take notice such things.
My issues with the new BATB- A sorta review

I…I didn’t like the movie. Granted, I don’t think it’s horrible in an objective sense, but it’s really not…good.

My problems:

-The first thing is probably the length and time issue. The pacing is really slow, and when it’s not remaking scenes of the original film line-by-line, it’s adding a lot of filler or exposition/backstory/explanation heavy scenes that you could cut out of the film and it wouldn’t change a thing since they barely add anything to the story. The movies just drags with all of its details and “extended” scenes (after the Beast scares her, it takes forever for the movie to take Belle out of the  castle- in comparison to the animated film which made her leave ASAP), by the time the Gaston number appears, you’re already feeling a little bored.

And the screen time is just really disproportionate, since it’s mostly cut between Belle and all the other characters. I know she’s the main lead and has to have the most screen time and all, but we also get a lot of the objects, of Gaston and Lefou, of the Beast, and they all seem to be struggling to get the same amount of screen time as her for we’re given all of their backstories, struggles, arcs…This is probably why the film feels so long tbh.

-Belle comes off as very haughty, proud and snobbish in this version. I’m not sure if it’s due to the writing or the acting, but she comes off as really unpleasant at times.

-Emma Watson can’t act or sing. She looks mostly annoyed or confused in most scenes.

-There’s barely any romance felt between her and the Beast, actually he’s rather cold at times. I think they even cut important scenes that show him/His personality from the original film. You know it’s a bad sign when Lumiere and Plumette have more chemistry than the two main leads.

-Naming the sexist town (that forbids women from reading!) Belle lives after the surname of one of the original female authors of the story. Quite a spit on the face on her and every female author/female BATB fan that exists, tbh

-Showing a rather…classist? message in the delivery of why Belle is not liked by the town. Apparently city girls are more intelligent, more independent and therefore more deserving of love and attention than dumb illiterate poor town hicks. (and often poor people don’t read because they can’t afford to? they don’t have the money for the education or the books? The message really felt condencending and patronizing)

-Tied to the above thing, Belle’s “inventor thing” never goes anywhere beyond that scene with the barrel, or any character development is ever given to her about it. Like, a better idea would’ve been like for her to start inventing in the castle or like, she starts talking about her stories to the servants, and they love what she says but they cannot read, so they can’t understand about it when she starts to recommend them books, but they want to, so maybe she starts reading them aloud stories or teaches Chip to read or something. I admit it makes Belle seem a bit “saviory”, but it could lead to this idea that Belle wants to help others and finally she has found people that want and appreciate her help, and it may give her this slight snobbish flaw she has, that she looks down on people who can’t help themselves being illiterate, and she shouldn’t look down on them for that and she understands and tries to better herself (check your privilege, Belle?)

-The whole thing about the mothers thing. I felt it was a little cliche but i kinda feel it’s also wasted potential, since Belle and the Beast could’ve bonded over losing their mothers and it could make Belle reflect on the nature of nurture, since she turned out to be a decent girl raised by her sweet dad while the beast was cruel due to his father…But this thing never really goes anywhere.

-The passage of time. Regardless of the weird timeline it has, the original is set in this timeline that makes the audience think the stay at the castle goes for weeks, but in here, the time is firmly established, and Belle and the Beast just fall in love in over a few days…Oy, remember when people said they liked that they DIDN’T fall in love at first sight or over three days?

-That dress. The final dress is modern too, but at least it’s pretty, and i really wish they would’ve made the ballgown patterned after that. I don’t get why all the other costumes are historically accurate but Belle’s dress just looks off.

-Lefou. Mostly because it felt more like a publicity stunt to attract viewers and nothing else, tbh, like that final gay moment is only like two seconds long, a distracted viewer would miss that scene and wouldn’t notice anything about it.

-So much CGI….So much…And while overall I did kinda enjoy the enchanted objects, they just look a little too creepy at times.

-The Enchantress is really out of place in this. Like, she’s there, but it would’ve been the same thing had she not been there, like in the original. Like, the moment Gaston insults her, I’m really surprised how she doesn’t curse him into another Beast. I mean she got angry before for even less.

-THE BEAST IS LEFT WITHOUT A NAME, AGAIN. And it’s really strange considering they name every other character that appears in the movie EXCEPT THE SECOND MAIN LEAD. WTF.

-The picture book plot hole…Like since this Belle is so smart, she could’ve easily transported herself to the inside of her home, come out into the town square, and tell everyone to leave him alone…And then she could just take him and transport the two of them back to the castle and be done with it.

I, I dunno. I see so many people loving it but I just find way too many flaws in it to like. I might be biased since I love the original film and overall the original BATB story, but this movie is not really told well, even as a stand alone film. I admit the original has flaws, but it still did a lot of good, and this film in trying to “correct” those flaws of the original, makes up more! All the warmth and heart of the original is gone with all these “motivations” and complexities.

Just…Stick with the Disney cartoon, it may have flaws here and there but it’s still a very good movie. Or watch the Jean Cocteau directed 1946 film, which is really good, creative and underrated. Or even the 2014 film starring Vincent Cassel, if you want something a little more modern yet still enchanting.

doginshoe  asked:

Once you get this you have to say five things you like about yourself, publicly, and send it to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable). SPREAD POSITIVITY! ♡

REALLY!!! ahhh *hugs*

okay right um i dont think there is five things hmmm ill try (warning some of these are gonna be really wierd because theres honestly barely ANYTHING i like about myself)

1. my ability to remember every character from anything ive watched  (i said they would be weird)

2. ummm my musical skills? like how quickly i can pick a song im learning on guitar or piano

3. ahhhhhhhh i cant think of anything else umm my drawings? theyre not always the best but ye some are

4. i guess my posture? its rare that i slouch because of ballet but i suppose i like that 

5. okay i tried not to point out my actual looks but im all out of other things so probably my eyes. is that vain? oh well

that was actually really freaking difficult like ive been coming back to this for over a week or so trying to finish it off it literally took a week to think of 5 things i like about me is that bad?ANYWAY thank you for the ask~ sorry it took so long but as stated ^^ twas hard :)

There is something growling in my chest
a creature snarling with a fearless tongue
a beast that bares it’s teeth
like that was what it was born to do
it’s crawling from a well in which
I had no idea anything was buried
this animal is graceful
and powerful
and I think it’s eaten my heart
and doesn’t want to give it back
I’m not even sure I want
the muscle replaced where I thought it lived
instead of nestled between the ribs
of this new companion
slowly unearthing its self
there is nothing
this fresh being is incapable of
it’s built with claws
and teeth
and giant, warm, and gentle paws for softer things
it’s getting stronger everyday
I’ve begun to wonder
where I end and where this wild thing begins
or if there was ever any difference at all
—  A.O.A.M. || New Heart
Concerts and Being a Decent Human Being.

So I want to bring up something that’s been a problem thru the past couple of Steam Powered Giraffe concerts I'v been to, along with some other concerts in the past.
The thing is a lot of taller people will stand straight in the front making it IMPOSSIBLE for someone who’s shorter to see the stage at all.
I’m 5'2 and the people who were standing in the front had been taller then me by a full torso, even while standing on my tip toes and trying not to fall I could barely see anything, and it happens all the time to me and shorter individuals.
This is a problem I don’t think has been addressed enough and its unfair for those of us who are short.
And yes, I know life’s not fair, but when I'v gone to 3 SPG concerts and all the times I'v not been able to really see the stage cause the tall people rushed to the front it becomes a problem that needs to be addressed.

Basically the only thing I’m asking is that during concerts PLEASE BE COURTEOUS TO SHORTER PEOPLE.
If your tall please don’t go to the front of the concert, or for the most part just be polite and if you see someone struggling and constantly shuffling and standing on there toes to just see the stage, take a step back and let them beside you or in front of you.
Its not going to prohibit you from seeing anything and you will be making someone’s day 100% better from just being a decent human being and being nice.

I don’t know what’s the deal half of the time with tall people but me and a lot of my shorter friends have been pushed further back and been treated roughly during SPG concerts and other concerts in general and its upsetting.
Sometimes it get’s to the point where we don’t even want to go to concerts since we won’t be able to see anything thanks to taller individuals.

So tall people, please keep an eye out for us shorter folk and please don’t all just rush the very front of the stage.



In Fitz’s briefcase everything has its own place

I had this headcanon that Fitz is very well-organised when it comes to work and engineering, but I couldn’t recall anything from the show to support it. 

And look, it was in here the whole time!

‘A One Time Thing’ mini fic. (Post fic, pre-epilogue.)  
I dunno what this is but I wrote it a few months ago because there was this image that wouldn’t get out of my head. And there are questions in my inbox that I haven’t answered because I suck, so have this to tide you over until I get to those. 
(Untitled because I couldn’t think of anything.) 

            She wakes up quickly, and it takes her a minute to realize why.

            There are soft whimpers coming from down the hall, and she sighs. She’s so ready for these nightmares to stop. She shifts, sitting up to go to Aidan when Killian stirs behind her.

            “What’s wrong?” he mumbles.

            “Aidan’s having a nightmare again. Go to sleep, I’ll handle it,” she tells him. He grabs her arm and she turns to him.

            “I’ll get him. You need your rest,” he says, and he can barely keep his eyes open he’s so tired. She rolls her eyes at him.

            “I’m pregnant, not dying.”

            He smirks, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to her lips, his hand falling to caress the slight swell of her stomach.

            “Go back to bed, Swan. I’ll take care of him.”

            As if on cue, Aidan lets out another cry, and Killian quickly gets up and makes his way out the door.

            She hears a weak Daddy? and her heart aches.

            And God but it’s one of her favorite things.

Keep reading

idk I’ve hardly done anything lately but here’s a quick concept sketch of… a weird tree?? I’m going to design these tiny little creatures that are born from it, kind of like bug parasites that grow inside the tree then come out (of the little orb sac looking things on the tree trunk) maybe every 5 years or so, and once they come out they either live in the flowers of the tree or they wear them (like little bell cloaks), I haven’t decided which, I guess it depends on the creature’s size… also.. it produces light somehow… idk how that ties in with anything though lmao… anyway, it’s a barely formed baby idea,  I still haven’t worked out details, but this is like.. some of the only drawing I’ve worked on recently (still on my wretched art block) so I thought I could post it even though it’s not finished just for the sake of like having some confirmation to myself that I’m at least getting a few things accomplished lol


I try
and try
and try some more
to feel something
I just can’t anymore
The pain that was caused
I tried to save myself from
to numb just where it hurts
but the numbing has spread to far
Its taking over my body
Its taking over my mind
I need to feel something
How could I have been so blind
I need to find an antidote
I need to find a cure
I found it once
But now it’s lost
That is the pain to bare
Had it run away?
Did I push it to the edge?
I guess I’m addicted to the numbness
A safety net at it’s best
You’re the only thing to stop the numbing
The only thing that can make me feel
But this is an evil, endless circle
I’ve been gone too long to heal
- @im-sick-of-sleeping-alone

I’ve recently decided to start following hockey and I don’t know anyone who is an avid fan so I will basically be learning about the sport from scratch. This blog is meant to be for my reactions to things, asking questions, etc.

Because I don’t know anyone who’s a fan, I didn’t really know which team to follow at first. Most of the articles weren’t very helpful( using specific players as a reason to follow or not follow a team isn’t helpful when I barely know who they are) but for some reason I was immediately drawn to the Red Wings.

If anyone has any advice or resources that would help, I would really appreciate it. I’ve been trying to read any articles that I come across, but there is a lot of history and thing to understand and I barely know anything beyond the basics.

Thanks in advance!


First of all, thanks for everything folks. Sticking through with this ddumb blog of mine even when i sometimes hardly post anything for weeks or months on end. Through all the subject matter changes, the art blocks, the occasional silly text post. Just thanks a bunch. I know to a lot of people 2k might not seem like a lot, but to me it most certainly is. There’s something so important to me about the fact that, on a blog separate from anything but my art, I’ve managed to reach so far.

Anyways, as a thanks, I’d like to do a giveaway! An art giveaway! I’ve always wanted an excuse to do one, and this is finally, I feel, a perfect opportunity for such a thing ;V!!

How this’ll go down is, I’ll pick from a randomized number gen, as these things often go. 3 winners will be chosen and contacted thru tumblr inbox/ask box system! p simple. If winners don’t get back to me within 3 days I’ll select a new winner, again v simple. 

Each winner will recieve a fully done piece of art of whatever they’d like! Preferably OCs or FCs of nearly any fandom with reference! I might be open to fan art as well depending on the fandom :v Limit is two character per request.

Rules are as follows:

  • likes & reblogs count, you can reblog as many times as you like, idrc
  • no giveaway blogs, beause c’mon man. like relly.
  • must be following this blog! this is for my followers, the tru mvps.
  • must have inbox open for me to contact you! If I can’t contact you, how the hek are u supposed to win an art???



My advice for anyone going through depression/anxiety:

1: Do not resort to keeping this to yourself, speak to someone you can trust. If you feel you don’t have anyone then your gonna have to push yourself to look for comfortable social situations you can bare being in, but don’t rush. If there’s one thing depression hates it is company 

 2: Find something easy access but extra enjoyable/indulging to do to overpower the mood swings

3: Your life/the world/your family/friends are not against you, seriously I can’t stress this one enough, try to pinpoint the exact thing making you feel like this and address it

4: If or when you cant bare being out in public, attempt to take in your surroundings instead of shutting them out, for example if you have anything nice to look at around you then take it in, nature can have its way of making things feel more relaxed

5: A lot more people than you think are going through the same as you, don’t feel alone, don’t be afraid of using social media to find someone you can trust and talk to

6. Those days when you feel you’re certain on giving up, please don’t. You have the same right to be happy as anyone else in this world

one thing i noticed on tumblr is the extreme backlash when a female celebrity says she isnt a feminist like. ya’ll drag her by her fucking hair but like……….

isnt internalized misogyny something we all had to overcome and learn about. just cause this woman is some years behind us bc of the generation gap doesnt mean she deserves less of a chance to grow. 

like im not gonna say anything abt the white woman vs woc debate because thats not my place and that to me IS a real criticism, but like

“this woman said she wasnt a feminist? *SNORT* right into the trash you go!” 

ya’ll know if a male celeb said he wasnt a feminist youd barely bat an eyelash. i wonder why its the women you drag so spectacularly………… 

could it be that internalized misogyny is a complex thing that takes ages to unlearn and mb u needa chill 

Starter for loyalwaters

Archie leaned back in his chair, bare feet kicked up on top of his desk.  Off the his side the radio was quietly playing, a news reporter relaying the events of the past couple days.  The hero of the day had succeeded in calming Kyogre’s mighty spirit, and the beast had supposedly retreated back to its cavern home.

They had come so utterly close to flooding the entire world that day.  Archie was without doubt that he would be remembering and atoning for his mistakes long after the troubles had passed.  But at the very least, he had been able to help out, with what little he could offer.  And yet, he wondered.

Why did he keep the orb? 

He snatched the artifact off his desk, clutching it tightly in his palm.  Fury and anger filled him as he held on; anger at himself and for all the trouble this damned orb had caused him.  But as much as Archie wanted to throw it at the wall and smash it to smithereens, it also calmed him.  

The pirate sighed, and pocketed the stone.  Ignorant of the faint glow of lines appearing for a moment on his forehead and chest, he pulled his legs down off the desk, and got up.  Maybe a talk with Matt was in order; that man always had a way of cheering him up.