its 4 in the morning why am I up

It’s 1am and i sent you old pictures of us hoping you would fucking feel something.
You opened up the message and now my hands are numb and im filled with regret. I get that i should leave you alone but im just not that strong. Its been 4 fucking months and i still love you with every inch of my heart and being. Why did you leave me so broken because i will never be the same nor will i ever be okay. I will just get used to the pain and have random break downs that will make me look insane. And maybe i am for still loving someone who doesnt even care for my existence, for still holding onto something that never really was.
—  sky monreal
“Why do you hate me?” (Ashton)

requested: yes

pairing: reader&Ashton

warnings: swearing and smut

word count: 4,017

summary: For an unknown reason to you, Ashton seems to just hate everything about you. And you could probably say the same thing about him. Until one day when you decide to finally get the truth out of him and then things take a really unexpected turn, leading to some of Ashton’s most well hidden secrets.

if you’ve been following me for a long time, you know i am the worst at summaries lol


Art class has always been one of your favorites. You like painting and drawing, it’s one of your biggest passions. Although, since the beginning of high school, it hasn’t been at the top of your list of favorite things to attend. There is only one person that can actually take away the passion you have for art from you, and that is none other than Ashton Irwin. You two have never liked each other. Thinking about it, you don’t really have a clue why, he just always throws you these dirty looks and rude remarks every time he gets the chance, so to say he doesn’t like you is pretty obvious.

You share only one class together and it so happens that the teacher seated you two next to each other. And lucky you, it’s art class, one of the only ones you actually enjoy attending. But ever since you had to share a seat next to Ashton, all of the fun in art kind of faded away. He never does anything the teacher asks him to, never even touches a pencil or a brush. He is a really weird kid, going against the rules probably thinking he’s cool, but he really isn’t. He is going to fail at something as easy as art, only because he’s being stubborn.

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Going back to bitching about communism, as stated before, we now have daily 4-hours long blackouts, and according to my city sector’s schedule, tomorrow I will have it from midnight to 4 am, or in less that two hours

I mean why? Which such retarded-ass hour? Oh and today I had it from 4 am to 8 am, and you know how I found out? Because the fucking ~85/95°F heat and 90% humidity woke me the fuck up at 5 am!

These bullshit blackouts are in place to save energy/not overload the country’s poor energy production capacity, so with that logic it makes sense to cut the lights at peak hours, but in the fucking early mornings? When most people are asleep and electric consumption is at its minimum? Just fucking don’t, let us sleep goddammit, 2010′s blackouts understood that! 

Fucking Venezuelan government, I swear to God…

4

it’s worth it. for science.