itchy & scratchy & marge

Grampa: Look what your bad egg of a son did to my teeth!

Homer: Dad, you and your stories. “Bart broke my teeth.” “The nurses are stealing my money.” “This thing on my neck is getting bigger.”

Marge: Now this is exactly what Bart’s teacher was talking about. Our son did something wrong and you look the other way.

Homer: But Marge, look at that hangdog expression. He’s learned his lesson. Let’s get him a present.

Inspired by a few jagoff antis in the Star Wars shipper tags, but universally applicable.

It really saddens me that people are getting bullied into feeling morally obligated to abandon ships they like just because some salty-ass antis got nothing better to do than try and validate their own sorry selves by sitting around spewing false accusations. 

If you’re one of those asshats who’s pulling this shit - plz go take a giant flying leap. And you fuckers know EXACTLY who you are. The ones who are saying shipping Fictional Character X with Fictional Character Y makes someone a rapist or an abuser or whatever the ridiculous fuck else. The ones who conflate creating and consuming fictitious works that contain questionable activities with perpetrating those acts IRL. The ones who think protecting imaginary people justifies harassing real ones while you hypocritically assume the moral high ground.

Fantasy is fantasy for a reason - it allows us the ability to explore beyond the bounds of what’s possible or acceptable in the real world. Okay, so you want to argue life imitates art and therefore art should be forcibly censored? Fine. Don’t you have bigger fish to fry than whining at fandom shippers? You know, like getting DVDs of Breaking Bad and the Sopranos taken off the shelves because it glorifies making meth and encourages people to participate in organized crime? How about getting adult toy stores with leather floggers and fuzzy handcuffs shut down because they romanticize violence, even though that stuff’s clearly for roleplay between consenting adults? Let’s get rid of Pokemon too while we’re at it, because that glorifies dogfighting rings and promotes taking wild animals out of their natural habitats to be kept in captivity. 

Sound ridiculous? GOOD. Because quite frankly, so do you.

If you’re not personally comfortable dabbling in certain fantasies, that is 100% your choice. But you don’t get to make that decision for the rest of us, and you sure as hell don’t get to guilt, bully, and shame real people for their fictional shipping preferences while posturing from some ridiculous position of assumed moral superiority. 

If you’re doing this, YOU are the bully. YOU are the aggressor. You are the goddamn problem. If you’re accusing fictional character shippers of being IRL rapists or abusers or whatever the hell else and demanding they apologize to you for having the audacity to put you in the position of “needing” to bully them for The Greater Good - you’re also a gaslighting asshat. 

Conversely, if you enjoy reading fanfic about fictional characters in a fictional world, and you fully realize it’s 100% fiction - you are doing absolutely NOTHING wrong. Enjoy what you love. Haters gonna hate. Let their hate be their problem, not yours.

eatplaylovesing  asked:

I want to watch the simpsons, i've seen gifs and stuff and some episodes but not paid much attention. but since there are more than 20 seasons could you tell me which episodes i absolutely have to see? if it helps i'm interested in satire, feminism, lgbt rights and i'm from outside the us. so it would be great if you told me the must-watch eps.

Woof. Okay. This is a big question. I’m gonna hit you with just a handful from each season. Feel no need to watch in any particular order.

1st season:

  • Bart the Genius
  • Moaning Lisa
  • Life on the Fast Lane
  • Krusty Gets Busted

2nd Season:

  • Simpson and Delilah
  • Treehouse of Horror
  • Two Cars in Every Garage and Three Eyes on Every Fish
  • Itchy and Scratchy and Marge
  • Lisa’s Substitute

3rd Season:

  • Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington
  • Homer Defined
  • Burns Verkaufen der Kraftwerk
  • Separate Vocations

4th Season:

  • Homer the Heretic
  • Lisa the Beauty Queen
  • Lisa’s First Word
  • Marge Vs. the Monorail
  • Last Exit to Springfield
  • The Front
  • Whacking Day

5th Season:

  • Homer Goes to College
  • Rosebud
  • Bart’s Inner Child
  • Bart Gets Famous
  • Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy
  • Deep Space Homer
  • Bart Gets an Elephant

6th Season:

  • Itchy and Scratchy Land
  • Sideshow Bob Roberts
  • Lisa on Ice
  • Homer Badman
  • Fear of Flying
  • Bart vs. Australia
  • Lisa’s Wedding
  • The Springfield Connection

7th Season:

  • Bart Sells His Soul
  • Lisa the Vegetarian
  • King-Size Homer
  • Team Homer
  • Two Bad Neighbors
  • Lisa the Iconoclast
  • Summer of 4 ft. 2

8th Season:

  • You Only Move Twice
  • El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer
  • The Springfield Files
  • Homer’s Phobia
  • Homer Vs. the Eighteenth Amendment
  • The Old Man and the Lisa
  • Homer’s Enemy
  • The Secret War of Lisa Simpson

9th Season:

  • Lisa the Skeptic
  • The Joy of Sect
  • Lisa the Simpson
  • The Trouble with Trillions
  • Lost Our Lisa

That’s all I got in me for now. That should get you started.

ATTENTION READERS: if you disagree, remember I am but one man, and I’m catering this list to this submitter’s requests. You list is probably very different, but this list is mine.