anonymous asked:

a 20 year old who doesn't know how to drive... if you're being serious, that's sad. if you're trying to be funny, that also sad. ha

I am an immigrant and I have lived in NYC MOST of my life where I was money savvy and used public transportation.

You scrolled all the way down through my blog to find my answer from 24 hours ago. If you’re the same anon that’s sad. If you’re not that’s also sad. Ha


What’s up guys long time no selfie
I only have a few days left in taiwan and wanted to post a couple pics from my day trip to jiufen and houtong cat village! I got back a few hours ago and now I’m sketching in my hotel room. I can’t believe my time in Taiwan is coming to an end. Taipei has come to feel like home to me.

However, this Thursday I’ll fly to Japan to spend my entire senior year studying abroad in Nagoya, and to top off all this craziness, I just hit 7500 followers!!! Holy shit! Thanks for sticking around through all my fandom jumping, and I promise to keep working hard to make pretty art!

It’s weird to think that this time a couple months ago I was an emotional wreck who struggled to finish a single piece of art in one sitting. But now I’m so happy, full of light and love and adoring the feeling of creating again. If I could, I would share this kind of happiness with every single one of you

He dreamed of flying, so Draco, Cygnus (the Swan), and Pegasus seemed fitting.


It took every single evening of a month and a half, several major setbacks, countless frustrating hours spent on one particular panel, and a dead router that only just got replaced an hour ago, BUT I DID IT!

I’ve been looking forward to this particular update for quite some time now, so I hope you like it ;^)

Chapter Seventy Four

Author’s note: this is trooping of the colour 2017. I’m quite happy with this chapter. Let me know how you feel.

She took a moment to stare at herself in the full length mirror in front of her. The indulgent material of her dress carved around her body like a second skin. She noticed how the soft colors made her eyes shine more brightly. Slightly bending her head, she couldn’t help but stare as her left hand wrapped itself around the expensive clutch, her own engagement ring beautifully shining back at her. She almost couldn’t recognize herself. Anna had placed the fascinator with much grace in her hair a half an hour ago. It didn’t have any feathers, thank god, Evee thought that it was actually really pretty. It edged itself on her blonde hair, almost covering her right eye.

How did she end up like this anyways?

She thought she looked gorgeous. She couldn’t fault one thing about herself standing in front of that mirror. Her make-up was flawless. She didn’t even think she had such long eyelashes. She had to step away from her image. A knock at the door interrupted her thoughts as she tore her eyes away from herself towards the door. “Come in.”

She smiled when she saw her fiancée (god, even she had to admit that still sounded weird) entering the room with a grin on his face. “You look gorgeous.”

“Thank you.” Evee couldn’t help herself but stare at his outfit. It was the first time she saw him in his Blues and Royals uniform. “Now you really look like a prince. It looks really good on you.”

He chuckled at her comment, “And you, you make a fascinator look damn attractive.”

“For a moment I thought you were going to laugh at me.” She grinned when he wrapped his arms around her neck. “Anna will kill you if you mess up my make up.”

“Just one kiss.” He mumbled, burying his head in the side of her neck, receiving a snort back from Evee.

“Okay, just one though.” She smiled when she felt he placed his lips upon hers. She could feel the tingle of his beard against her chin and sighed. When Harry put more pressure against her lips, her own curved around his bottom lip. She could feel his hand roaming against her ribs, “Careful for the hat.” She mumbled, as he crooked his head and walked her backwards. She could feel her own back being pushed against the wall as his tongue gently danced against her lip, asking for permission.

She willingly danced along, sighing once again into his mouth. These kisses would never do anything less than make her knees buckle. Her hand made its way towards the back of his head, gently rubbing his hair with her fingertips, adding even more pressure.

“Guys, carriages are read- Oh! Oh! Sorry! Oh god.” She heard a familiar voice speak and then a door closing roughly. Their lips parted as they looked in each other’s eyes for a moment.

Evee couldn’t help but burst out laughing, placing her hand in front of her mouth. “Kate, we’re coming!” She yelled, through the door. “Let me just-“ She looked at Harry with a grin, her eyes adverting towards his mouth where she could spot a hint of her own lip-gloss. Taking her fingers, she quickly whipped away the remains. “There.” She beamed like a small child, staring into his blue orbs.

“Thanks.” He grinned, “We should probably get going.”

“And apologize to Kate.” Evee added, turning around and walking towards the door, opening it once again.

“She should apologize to us, she interrupted us.” Harry muttered, receiving a little slap from Evee.

When they finally managed to walk towards the courtyard of Buckingham Palace where the whole family gathered, she walked up towards Kate. “Sorry about that.” Evee mumbled adverting her green eyes from Harry’s wink and blushing.

Kate laughed, “It’s fine. Let us all be glad that it wasn’t Harry’s grandmother calling you guys.”

“Thank god.” The blonde muttered, her eyes widening in fear when realization hit her. “That would’ve have been…”

“Another embarrassing story to add to the book?” Kate smirked, looking at Eveline’s flushed cheeks.

“Definitely.” She eyed the many carriages and horses in the courtyard, waiting to be occupied by the members of the Royal family. “I heard I’m not sitting with you.”

“Harry and you are getting your own carriage, how romantic.” She laughed. “At least he won’t have to sit with Camilla and I anymore.”

“Maybe we can switch and he won’t notice. You can sit with me and he can sit with Camilla.” Evee replied, already feeling a little nauseous, she knew Harry would tease her throughout the whole ride.

“He’ll notice. I’m sure.” Kate grinned. “This is mine, I’ll see you in the Horse Guards Building. Good luck by the way.”

Evee nodded her head, watching how Camilla and Kate stepped into the carriage. “Thanks a lot.” She almost stuck out her tongue at the duchess but when she saw the Queen stepping outside of the courtyard, she held her composure. Evee smiled and bowed her head slightly when they made eyecontact, receiving a smile from the older lady.

“This is us.” Harry spoke, gently guiding his fiancée towards the carriage. “Ladies first.” He grinned.

“Why thank you, my fair man.” She smirked, looking back at him when she tried as gracefully as possible to enter the carriage. Trying not let it sink in how big of a deal this all was, she placed herself onto the seat, watching how Harry did the same next to her.

“You ready?” He spoke one last time in private, his eyes scanning the expression on her face, gently squeezing her knee.

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” She tried to give him a reassuring smile back, ignoring the way her heartbeat in her throat. When she felt the carriage move forward, led by two black horses, she swallowed.

Right, now wasn’t the time to be nervous. Just try to be calm, Evee. You’ve been through worse weathers. She spoke to herself.

When they drove out of the courtyard and into the main streets, she had to take a second or two to readjust. There were so many people shouting and waving flags. The sounds of them were deafening. A smile appeared on her face, as she remembered Harry’s advice, smile and wave.

“I think I can hear your name being shouted. Are you okay?” Harry yelled in her ear.

They both kept their distance from each other, Evee knew that she couldn’t really touch him as much in public as they did in private. “I’m fine.” She nodded her head, smiling at everyone and in the meantime waving.

“I bet they would shout even harder if we flashed them.” He spoke into her ear with a grin.

“Shut up.” She tried not to playfully slap his arm and thankfully, managed to not assault him. Evee couldn’t help but laugh though, throwing her head back. “Stop teasing me.”

“Right. I’m not going to do that anymore.” He nodded his head, waving at the crowd and biting his cheek in laughter.

After ten minutes of silence and continuously smiling and waving, Evee thought her hands were going to cramp up. She pushed her head closer to Harry’s, “I think my hand is cramping up.”

He laughed, eyeing the beautiful woman next to him. “Now we don’t want your hand to cramp up. I still need that for other… Purposes.” He spoke with a cheeky grin.

She pulled down both of her hands, finally letting them rest on her lap. “You’re right, I will need this hand to punch you when we arrive. I’ll let it rest for now.” She whispered in his ear, noticing they were around St James Park.

“Now, you can’t let the people down, you need to wave, sweety.”

She laughed once again, eyeing him with teasing eyes. Deciding to ignore him for now, she raised her left hand and waved to the crowd once again. Evee was glad when they arrived at the Horse Guard Road. She followed Harry as he gently guided her with his hand on her lowerback. “We’ll watch ceremony now.” He spoke.

She noticed how the Queen arrived and seated herself in front of the courtyard. She received a royal salute and inspected her troops. Evee stood in awe and held her breath as she could see the entire Household Division conduct a march past the Queen. They paraded with guns.

“That’s the King’s Troop.” Harry spoke to her in her ear, pointing. They took precedence as the mounted troops perform a walk-march and trot-past.

Evee slowly nodded her head, still in gob smacked at the crowd in front of her. “I’ve never seen anything like this.” Music was playing in the background, she knew there had to be at least 400 musicians.

“Never seen it on television either?” Harry questioned.

“No.” Evee replied. She hadn’t. They never broadcasted in Belgium and she never actually sat down to watch it the first two years she moved to London.

“First time for everything.” He grinned next to her, “Wait until you’re on the balcony and you see the massive crowd coming towards you.”

She nodded her head once again, lost for words. Charles was standing a few feet away from her as he gave her an encouraging smile. She grinned back at him, adverting her eyes once again towards her front. The ceremony took quite a bit but Evee didn’t get bored once. She was amazed on how these troops could perform so well. Not a single one of them was out of line, they blended in so well together. She finally realized how much they respected Harry’s grandmother, aka The Queen.

It was the first time that realization really sunk in. Standing in front of a crowd this big, sitting in a carriage waving at thousands of people shouting her name, the big expensive rock on her finger, the way Harry looked in his Royals and Blues. This was actually happening.

She was going to be a part of the royal family.

Hell, she could feel that she already was part of them.

They way these people had accepted her like she was one of them. The way they smiled at her, encouraging her, making sure she was fine. William had eyed her a couple of times, just as well as Harry’s father and stepmother to make sure she was holding her own. Harry’s hand resting on her lower back, sometimes giving her a reassuring rub, telling her how good she was doing.

When they finally stood in line to wait in front of the closed windows to enter the balcony of Buckingham Palace, she took a deep breath. “Just one more thing and we’re done for today, okay?” Harry smiled, noticing the way Evee bit her lip. “You’ve been doing really well, I’m proud of you.”

He always said that to her. ‘I’m proud of you.’

She never said that to him. She didn’t know why she never did. Because she was incredibly proud of him. He accepted her the way she was, he held her when she cried, he always thought she was the best thing in the world, even when she was burping the alphabet. He defended her towards his family, he made sure she always felt good. He always made wonderful love to her and he always made her feel like home. “I’m proud of you.” She smiled, looking into his blue eyes.

“Of me?” He looked at her in confusion



“Because I have always been more mine than I have been someone else’s but that was before I met you. You’ve managed to do that. I love you for making me love you.” She mumbled, looking a little embarrassed.  “Thank you for having the patience.”

He stared at her for a minute or two, ignoring how the windows of the balcony opened in front of his grandmother. He quickly wrapped his arms around her neck and pulled her into a kiss. “You know I’d wait a thousand years for you.”

She grinned, kissing him back. “We should probably go outside before they zoom in on us kissing.” Evee mumbled, watching how William, Kate and the kids followed Charles and Camilla in front of them.

When Harry guided Eveline on the balcony, she eyed everybody in front of her. She could see George staring over the edge over the balcony with curious eyes and grinned at him. “He’s always eager to see the planes flying over.” Harry spoke towards her, also eyeing his cousin.

They were both standing behind William and Kate but she didn’t really mind. She could see the crowd well enough and still enjoy Harry’s banter in her ear. She watched how Kate, who was holding Charlotte, turned her head towards Evee, “Alright?”

The blonde grinned from underneath her fascinator. “Never been better.” She laughed when Charlotte raised her hands at Evee, trying to get into her arms. “I’ll grab you inside, Charlotte, now you need to stay with your mummy, alright?”

She didn’t see the way Harry looked at her with lovesick eyes when she spoke and smiled at Charlotte, but the rest of the world surely did.

When the planes flew over Buckingham Palace, releasing their colours and Evee could feel Harry’s hand on her back, she couldn’t help but think that she was the luckiest girl in the world.

I knew good things couldn't last forever.

J got picked up this morning for a warrant from another town. I have no idea why he had a warrant from fucking warman but apparently he does. The cop took him down to the station about an hour ago and I can’t stop crying. He will not be released. I know that for a fact. He was on VERY strict conditions and they told him if he fucked up again he would be doing time. We hadn’t been been in or near warman since he was last in jail so idk what the fuck that’s even about??
I’m so fucked though. Now I won’t be able to afford rent. I don’t want to be homeless with two little kittens. Obviously they will be coming with me wherever I go because I love them so much. And to top it all off I won’t even be able to speak or see him because we still have a no contact order. He can get in trouble if he tries to contact me. This entire day sucks. This entire life sucks. I just want to live a normal life and I’ve never, not once, had that. I love him so much and I’m so fuckimg hurt right now. This isn’t easy. I srsly just want to die like I barely have anything to live for anymore. This keeps happening ofer and over and yeah maybe I need to change some things in my life but I’ve tired constantly to make things better but they never do. Which is why I see no hope not being sober. History repeats itself.

PARENTHOOD : I'm taking your daughter to prom

The small film of sweat was now like a second skin on her face. She thought about how things were calm and peaceful maybe ten a hour ago. She was calmly and peacefully sleeping when like a wave attacked her and soak the entire sheet between her thights. She called Derek right the way and he drive to the hospital. Of course , because it wasn’t like every labor , the maternity was prepared and developed security measure to keep away paparazzi and any other crazy looking for a photo of the Roman heir. Nothing too much , without disturb the function of the hospital. Everything was just set to be as comfortable as possible. A room , with the family and friend , waiting with couple stuff to drink and eat. Kyle fell asleep since a while , resting her head against a wall. It was past 4am now. Pete was more silence , just waiting. Terrence, with his own new born , in the arms , sleeping Terrence Junior born a month away . The devil would have never planned that a night stand will finish as pregnancy and even less as fatherhood. Her doesn’t want to raise him and abandon her parental right to let Terrence be the father , having the full custody. Sloane was nervous, walking all around the room. That was her baby over here, becoming a mother by her own. New contraction

“ Oh my god!!!!” screamed Ahsha , turning in the bed again . No matter which position , this baby was just taking her belly for a punchy ball. Ahsha was tired , in pain , upset, drown under hormones. She was here since hours now. In his side , Derek was next to her. He first stand by her side, holding her hand before Ahsha yelled at him to leave her alone. The less than we can say is that Ahsha wasn’t really receptive to the pain , and all she found to handle it was to blame her husband. Derek didn’t get offended. He knew it can happen. He just remain calm and sit in a chair. Will be there when she will ask for him. Him too never imagine that the birth of his first child will be like that. He would have never imagine that Ahsha will be so in pain and him being so powerless. He proposed her everything , water, food, music , blanket , tea, games, movies , fresh towel but his wife refuse it all. Her entire chest raise from the bed , as Ahsha screamed killed his heart


She apply the advice from the class , breath , breath , breath. Breath loudly and try to calm. She lay down again . Touching her belly , nope…she was still there

“ Ok you need to get out!“said Ahsha . She was now talking to her belly, and vagina and a baby who couldn’t even understand her ” Get the hell out of me!!“

"Ahsha…” tried to reason Derek . He tried to approach again and this time Ahsha grabbed his hand , resting her head on his entire chest. He hadn’t the right to say anything but … He was tired too and impatient to meet his baby girl

“ Oh my god! This try to kill me” cried out Ahsha. She was now in tears. She was coming through so many emotion and sensation at the same time. Expect joy , or excitement yet.  

“ Ok ok ok I promise I never gonna have sex again” Said Ahsha , watching the roof , talking to god now

“ What ?!” whispered Derek, not low enough because Ahsha heard it. Yes she was feeling that bad, that bad that she doesn’t wanted to have sex again .Sex was what lead them so far. Ahsha’s contraction were getting closer and closer She was now feeling the little body moving down on her. She picture a vagina , a baby,  for her it was just impossible to expel. Suddenly she was scare the hell out. She couldn’t see her have enough strength to do it . Her heart beat increased , so does her fear. The moment was right there. Her husband saw her insecurities and came even closer to Ahsha. He caressed her hair , kissing her forehead

“ Everything will be fine baby ” he slowly whispering

“ Derek I’m sorry , I’m so sorry ” she begged him , in tears. She couldn’t do it without him and she felt terrible for having treating him that way. She was loving her husband , and the incredible destiny he was giving to her. Him wanted her to keep her strength to push and not in apologies. She firmly grabbed his hands .The door of the room opened on the doctor team , him and two nurse. They were already prepared and the couple knew… Right now this is going to be The doctor took the stool and sit on it , in front of Ahsha. One last check to be sure…

“ Alright Mrs Roman, I think we’re ready ” he announced  ” At my count I gonna ask you to push"

Derek completely surround Ahsha’s shoulder. The presence of her man was really reassuring in this though moment. Ahsha followed the instruction , her visage always deformed by the effort but she was doing an absolutely good job

“ This is great Ahsha” complimented the Doctor and his head disappeared between her thighs again

“ There she is ! Come here little girl, come meet your parent”

Ahsha didn’t feel it , her view was blurred . She wasn’t sure of what was real what wasn’t. She could feel her heart beat , letting her know she was still in live. Derek was still there, his perfume and rock body against her but they weren’t completed. Her family wasn’t completed. There was a huge silence , everybody stop to breath. Ahsha wasn’t sure and she needed to raise her head to see a little brown but pale brown thing being covered , passing to the nurse. The baby cries , for the first time , her presence already filling the room… The Doctor took it to carefully place the daughter into her mother arms, close to her parents. Ahsha could see it but a tears rolled down one of her husband’s eye. Her own eyes were filled of tears. There was joy , happiness, excitement. Looking the little creature, the symbol of their love , healthy and living it took them right back when all start. Before they saw an angel just one time , that time, in that gymnasium, when they crossed their soul mate, but right now , they were having an angel , right in Ahsha’s arms.

“ She is beautiful Derek” exclaimed Ahsha “ She look just like you. Oh my god. Thank you so much baby”

She was beyond grateful for what her husband gave her today. She raise her head to drop a peck on Derek’s lips. GRATEFUL

“ How do you want to call her ?” asked the doctor

“ Maria “ said Ahsha , before Derek can answer . They hadn’t decide , wanted to see her before but her name was belonging to that angel. In honor of the woman who blessed Ahsha’s life without know it. Mary Roman. Ahsha’s daughter will be name Maria Eva Roman . Ahsha was grateful. GRATEFUL


After put her two years old and Tj on bed , Derek joined Ahsha in their bedroom. His wife was sit at the board of their bed, having the little box between her hands. After their last trip and Ahsha forgetting to take her pills box , they knew it was a reality and consequence they needed to face back in LA. With all those time they had unprotect sex , getting pregnant was more than possible. The couple had been so happy to leave, for a romantic trip that Ahsha forgot the all entire world. This trip , in couple had been well more than appreciate , especially with the last crisis they been through. Raise children and keep a marriage on track never been easy. They start to distance from each other and there was no romance between the both of them .When Ahsha proposed to leave the kid to Terrence , Derek had been surprised. Happily surprised. The next day , they were on a jet. The worry on his wife face was saying it all. He sit next to her and took one of her hands between his. He always need to lean to talk to her in the eyes

“ Whatever happen Ahsha we will face it , together ” he said , in the little dark of the room

“ You’re not scare ?” asked Ahsha , looking at him . How could he not be , after all recently happen between them. As much they love Maria and TJ , children was one of the reason why they we ‘rent doing so well couple weeks before. Welcome another child , might bring them where they were , before they do so much effort “ We just came out from a really hard time. We , you and I just found our groove between the children, the work”

“ I know Ahsha , and I’m scare. Having another child is always scary. But I promise you , it won’t be like the first time. I will pay attention to you more and our marriage. Now that we know the recipe , allow more time to our couple and have an equal balance , things will be easier”

Derek couldn’t deny his own responsibilities in this . He was passing well too much practicing and not enough home. When he was , he was for sure the best father with Terrence but he was allowing to Ahsha only bedtime. Couple minute before went to sleep wasn’t enough .

“ Ok I will do the test ” just spoke Ahsha. Standing up. She walked to their private bedroom , locking herself. Derek could now release his calm face and freak out a little bit. He was as scared than her. Last time Ahsha was pregnant , a lot of stuff happened. Like her mood during the pregnancy , her excessive way. With two little kid , deal all of it was a huge pressure. Ahsha came out , the little stick between the hand. Her face without any emotions

“ So…” hesitated Derek

Ahsha sit on his laps , if she was discovering she was pregnant again , it was right there , with her husband that she wanted to know it

“ We still have to wait couple more minute ”

“ Ok , come here” said Derek , tighten his grip around her waist “ We’ll be fine Ahsha” he added, kissing her cheek

“ Derek, I know you’re a fantastic father , you’re an amazing man I don’t want you to think that I’m affray to carry your child because that is not true. I’m blessed to be the mother of your child. I’m just scare for us. I love you , don’t you ever forget that Please I’m begging you ”

“ I won’t ”

She joined his lips , capturing them. He welcome her kiss , with a hand on her neck , pushing her closer to his mouth . She purposely didn’t tongue his mouth , just caresses , in a really sweetly ways his lips , as they exchange a passionate kiss. She parted , smiling. That face, the man of her life couldn’t lie to her after kiss her that way. She trust him and their marriage .She looked down the pregnancy test

“ Babe…it’s positive. I’m pregnant” she announced


Derek and Terrence were doing a pool game , enjoying of the silence at the mansion .Which was pretty rare. And never last. In a huge noise , the main door opened , brutally. It forced the two men to walk in the hall , wanted to know what was going on

“ I hate you TJ! You ruined my life ” screamed Maria. She was obviously upset to her brother. Tj and Maria grew up together , raise by the same parents, living in the same houses , neither the mansion neither Terrence’s apartment. They were like twins. Kid they were just inseparable but now that they were teenagers, that close to become adult with their 18’s , tensions show up , like normal siblings do. But it was really rare that they were arguing that way.

“ It’s your fault! ” yelled TJ , totally ignoring their fathers “ I told you to stay away from him. But you didn’t listen. No Maria have to date the guy I hate the most in the entire planet”

“Hey what’s going on ?” tried to calm Derek “  Where is your mum? ”

“We ground! That’s going on” answered Maria, without look away at TJ. She couldn’t believe what happened today at the high school. For her , it was a bomb for her reputation. Being Derek Roman ’s daughter wasn’t easy to catch boys , not only having Terrence Wall as uncle , but now she was having an over protective brother “  Mom have to leave for the Arena after the principal office”

“ What ?!” said Terrence. The principal office ? What did those kids did for Ahsha to be convene to the principal office

“ Why did you do that ?!” questioned Maria . All she heard is that it was having a fight in the boys lock room. That TJ and Dani was involve, Dani who had been recently spending a lot more time with Maria lately

“It’s not your business” spitted TJ. The reason why , Terrence’s son perfectly know it , he just didn’t want Maria heard about men stuff

“ Not my business. You kick my crush and it’s not my business” Maria thought

“ Your what ?” repeated the boy “ He is nothing for you!!”

TJ was warning her. Just the thought of Dani and Maria together was sending him over the edge. He will never accepted it. Maria was well too good for a guy like Dani

“Enough you two!” stopped Terrence, firmed. Terrence and Derek could play their best friend and were trying to be as understandable as possible but when they wanted to remind them who were the father , they perfectly knew it and no one was talking back. Tj and Maria knew it as well. The girl ran upstairs

“TJ what happened ?” asked Derek

“I knew that Maria and Dani Stewart was… into something” explained TJ , a little more calm but we can still feel the tense in his muscles from the argue he just had with his sister . For a 18 years old boy , it was without surprise he was already good looking , driving the girls crazy “ I told her to stay away from him. She doesn’t know him like me and my friend did. When I entered in the locker room I heard Dani say inappropriate words about Maria. I couldn’t help myself, I put my hand on his fucking face”

“TJ!” reprimanded Terrence. Swearing wasn’t allow in this house either  

“What kind of inappropriate word ?” spoke Derek. He was curious. More the conversation was going , and more he was into TJ’s side. Maria was seeing boys , spending time with them in high school. He didn’t send her ass in school for that

“Uncle Derek you don’t want to hear that”

“ I do!”

“He said he will ask Maria to go to prom with him just for have sex with her after. Then he had the intention to fuck her in his car so hard that she will beg him to stop. I should kill him in fact!!!”

“TJ!!!” yelled Terrence

“What ? I did what I had to do to protect Maria. You will do exactly the same if someone had say something like that about Aunt Ahsha. You always say me Maria is like my sister but it isn’t true. She IS my sister and I did what I had to do. And I will do it again if he approach her ever again! Period”

The passion and energy TJ was having toward the fact he wanted boys to threat his sister well was touching. It was just representing the education he received. The value he was having. The both men couldn’t throw him flower for having been involve in a fight but the feeling was there. Especially when the reason was so noble

“Nott that I’m for violence but, I’m proud of you ” whispered Terrence

“Thanks son” said Derek , giving his godson an accolade “ Don’t worry we will explain to Maria”

Behind , the door fiercely opened again. On Ahsha

“Maria Eva Roman !!!” she screamed “Terrence Junior Wall!!!”  

“Oh oh” let out TJ

Ahsha wasn’t playing at all. She was mad enough in the office and couldn’t believe her ears. She tried her best to not appears like an abuse mother in front of an stranger but it won’t prevent to whoop their asses now they where alone. It was embarrassed enough to be called by the school to go get her children because of discipline issue. She won’t let this pass that easily

“Don’t worry we got that” said Terrence , giving the authorization to TJ to leave Which the boy did

“ Babe..” added Derek , coming to his wife , surrounding her waist. But Ahsha quickly escaped , furious

“ Derek it’s not the right time. Where are they ?”

“ Ahsha ” started Terrence “ we know you’re upset but let us explain what really happened between the kid”  

“I know what happened. The principal told me. Your son is violent and your daughter provoke a fight ”

Ahsha was that extreme , anytime the children were doing some bad stuff suddenly they were just their father’s children , and not hers anymore. For her , she hadn’t raise them like that

“ TJ came into the locker room and heard the guy say some stuff about Maria so TJ defends his sister” explained Terrence

“Defended” repeated Ahsha. They might not heard about everything. How violent it had been was what scared Ahsha. “ He’s at the hospital!” TJ sent someone at the hospital .And that , Terrence and Derek didn’t know how serious it was. TJ never mentioned beat someone for him to go to the hospital. If the Dani was putting charge, it will get ugly really quickly.

“What kind of stuff justify TJ started a fight” asked Ahsha , really worried “ This is not like him ”

TJ was the sweetest boy. Derek came closer to Ahsha and whispered in her ears

“The kind of stuff I told when we are extremely sexually excited ”

From her expression she totally understood what they meant. Why TJ had been so violent. Someone being disrespectful toward her daughter , also , sent her over the edge. She was more understandable, that wasn’t ok .

“ They’re still ground!” concluded Ahsha. There is no way they get away with this.” But we can not cancel the BBQ of tonight"

“Yes. The cheerleader and the player are probably already on their way” agreed Derek

Like after each big game, the Roman’s was receiving the teams to celebrate around a BBQ with friends.

“What about their trip at Chicago ? ” insisted Derek . At the beginning of summer, they were leaving , by their own. They were preparing this trip since a year , Maria even worked at the dance studio and TJ in a coffee shop to pay the half of it. It was their goal and ultimate objective for this summer “ You know how important it’s for them to leave without parent ?”

“ Maybe they shouldn’t punch somebody then”

Ahsha wasn’t ready to cede. What they had been involve in was wrong and should not happen again. It was serious  

“ Girl… let them have a little fun” tried Derek , kissing her neck . He knew her weakness

“If you promise me You’ll talk to TJ. I don’t want he become one of those guy who beat first and ask question after”

“Promise ”

“ Please call me Ahsha” said Ahsha , sit in her chair , in the middle of the spot line. Derek had been agree for the interview can take place in the mansion , here, right in her intimacy. The magazine wanted a “ get close” approach. Of course the player was at practice, the kid at school , so it was just this lovely woman journalist and her . Girly afternoon this is going to be. She smiled, happy to be so well welcome in the Roman’s mansion

“ Your journey is kinda impressive Ahsha” the journalist started, speaking loud enough for her mic catch her voice “ You’re running the Los Angeles Devil girl , you have your own dance studio , you developed a line of clothes who is just so great. You entered in Forbes list of women the most successful . You’re married and a mother ”

Ahsha did have such an inspired journey. From this naive and carebear girl she was , secretly dreaming to become a Devil Girl , she was now this strong and powerful female figure, leading the dance time , if it’s wasn’t the all dance in LA , and that since years . She was completely accomplished. But what make her happy , happy to breath more each second was for sure those one who didn’t bring her fame and money

“ I’m extremely blessed and grateful for all ” said Ahsha , a little shy. She never been totally comfortable by speaking to the press, she know how delicate it was “ but my biggest pride is definitely my children and my husband”

The pleasure of being a mother was even more intense each day. Even now that they were more teenager than those cuties little babies 18 years ago. Maria , Tj and Levi were why she was waking up every morning, to raise them

“ Can you tell us more about the parenthood ” carefully asked the interviewer. “ We rarely have the opportunity to see them in the press ”

Derek and Ahsha chose to not expose their children and family life in the media. It was better like that , a precious value in their education , keep them as far from what was unreal. They will have to build their lives , just like their parents did. Nothing in their family was usual , they weren’t having grandparent from Derek’s side , they were having two father and one mother. Ahsha raise TJ as he is her son and it was even a sensible subject for her when people was saying that she wasn’t his biological mother. But , hopefully they were really down on earth

“ It was a choice , Derek , Terrence and I didn’t want to expose them like that” explained Ahsha “ But yeah…they are just fantastic. Of course they aren’t babies anymore and we can’t hugs and drown them under kisses now but…those kids are gold ”

“ There is more embarrassing than have Ahsha and Derek Roman as parents”

The couple in itself was the IT couple . Their love story was becoming goal. They were the face of the sexiest and powerful relationship , with everything to their feet. Their last Calendar photoshoot , with really really sexy photo was making the fireman jealous

“ We actually never play that card with them ” Ahsha said , she never wanted to seduce her children. She was their mother, that they like it or not. “ We wanted to raise them as normally as possible. This is why they are not in a private school , or have driver with cars. The fact we keep them out of the flash , they don’t need to go out with bodyguard and everything. I didn’t want my children in the middle of this. I grow up in a modest home . By the time, my mother was a single mother but yet I never miss of anything. I’m not going to lie , they don’t miss of anything either but they are not more privileged. They are like every teenager , they having friend sleeping over, they do mistake and everything. Derek and Terrence are really involved in the sport department of their high school. We’re having huge BBQ at the mansion after victories , we supervised their trips . It’s feel really great to be an adult and parent capable of not only make your own children enjoy of a kind of life style but also make people around them too. It’s really really cool to take care of this next generation that way but we’re not paying them extravagant things . It was really important for me that they values things and know how blessed they had been ”

To the tone in her voice , and her expression when she was talking about education , it was a lot different from talking about business and fashion.

“ We can say that you love being a mother ” complimented the journalist

“ Yes I practically love being a mother ” agreed Mrs Roman

“ You’re literally a model , not only for young ladies but also women. You’re the living proof that you can be successful , you can be a mother and still can be a wife ”

This fact , make her head say yes. It wasn’t easy every day to have so much different hat but juggle between each of them was a really hard exercise

“ It’s definitely possible” spoke Ahsha , crossing her legs , who were endless thank to her heels “ Like I said before , I’m really proud of my marriage too. Every couple have their ups and downs , and Derek and I aren’t an exception but I can say that I’m a happy married woman , who love her husband ”

“ It must not be easy , especially in the middle of all this . We heard rumors , and all kind of stuff in the press. Derek is a NBA Basketball player, he of course travel a lot. It might affect your life as a couple. Plus raising three children ”

“ Yes it can” Mrs Roman was speaking the truth “  Both of our career take a lot of time. Raising our children take time. But if we we’re listening to the gossip , Derek and I wouldn’t been where we are. According them , Derek cheat on me one hundred time , I cheat on him one hundred time, I’m not sleeping in the same bed than him , we were ready to divorce plenty time. All those things aren’t true at all. We sure had our crisis but if I’m still married , it have a purpose .Derek and I are more than fine. The worse is that when people of our circle , friend and family believe it. Once my mother called me , scared the hell out asking me if I was divorcing. Mom , no. Sometime it’s really funny .My best friend called me , swearing that Derek was cheating because a video online was showing the devil in a club. But the man on the video wasn’t Derek because I had Derek right in front of me ”

She end up laughing . Her union with Derek was strong, and now all those stories was laughable , but it had been a time , it wasn’t at all. And they indeed almost divorce once.  

“ Honestly , why Derek will cheat on you ?” teased the woman “ You recently had been elected like the sexiest woman in the world by GQ magazine. That it not nothing Ahsha. Derek literally have the sexiest woman in the world in his bed. I hope he know that ”

“ Oh believe me, I don’t let him forget haha” she smirked. Receive appreciation for men was just even more delightful for Ahsha , because it was a reminding for Derek

“ What is your secret ? Let’s not forget that you gave birth to two children ”

“ I will say.. workout out , healthy alimentation . I still dance a lot , I choreograph every performance of the Devil girl even if I myself don’t perform . I actually love keep me in shape. Derek is my trainer so we spend time together in the weight room. After my baby girl born, I was obsessed with the idea of getting the body that I have before the pregnancy.  I was working out too much , not eating enough , I was making myself sick but my husband really help me a lot with that. I will say that , the cocktail is working out, healthy food and confidence. You have to be confident with yourself , trust that you still can be sexy and seductive. You have to be confident in your feminity and never stop believe that even if you’re a mother , or a wife you’re still a woman. After Maria born , I forgot all this and when I remember it , everything was getting better for me .I start to go on spa day with my girls , buy some lingerie again. It’s really important for yourself , but also for your marriage too. I never let Derek treating me like I’m just the mother of his children. When I told him GQ wanted me on their cover , which mean pose in bikini and be really sexy ,  he wasn’t all possessive and authoritarian , he was actually really proud like ” that is my girl “

Ahsha wanted to break the myth and the obsession the society , most of it the pressure put on mothers to have the post pregnancy body back .For many , it was just impossible and just like many Ahsha been through this crisis. Now , she was good in her skin and even if we couldn’t tell she had two children , she wasn’t having her 20’s body. Her body grew, just like her and she was having more curve , in a pleasant way , that of course Derek was loving

” Thank you so much Ahsha" concluded the journalist

“ Thanks to you ”

BBQ night it was this day at the mansion. It was always a pleasure to welcome those teens in the house . For the parent , it was practical , since they were here , they weren’t somewhere else , doing something else. There, they could enjoy of good food, drinks and their friend with music and joy. For being almost twins, TJ and Maria were having the same group of friend. Most of the girls were around the pool while the boys were neither with them or playing ball. Levi , being just a little younger were having his own friend in his side. Derek and Terrence were out , at the Arena and Ahsha was dinning with Sloane .They were trusting them enough to handle things without their presence. Levi took Madison’s hands making her follow him. They left the garden , entering in the mansion. Madison thought they will stay in the living room , in calm. With the week , she hadn’t spend that much time with her boyfriend and right now seems to be the perfect one. But Levi , Derek’s son , in a true Roman was having something else in the mind . Something even more intimate. They mount the stairs , right in his bedroom. They entered, Madi a little more hesitating

“ You know I don’t like going on your bedroom and be alone” she said , standing there, in the middle. Levi came behind her , put his hands on her hips. Madi could sense his perfume behind her , the kind of perfume she was sleeping with every night since she stole him several shirt of him.

“ What are you scare for babe ? ” he whispered in her right ear “ I’m not going to jump on you . Or do I ?”

Teaser , he was loving teasing her. His lips crush in her neck , dropping a peck .Madi smiled , pushing him away

“ Jerk ” she laughed Levi came in front of her , facing her

Madison was the sweetest girl of the high school. Really serious and this kind of natural beauty was giving her a wise look. She was the cutest girlfriend. They were together since over a year now and she already had been introduce to Derek and Ahsha . First , the mother wasn’t so glad of it but when she saw that the girl was bringing the best in her son , she was all for it. They started to date couple time after Madison stop giving some french class to Levi. Her little afro was making Ahsha dreamed about her little children , in many year after

“ I love your top. He is really pretty on you ” Levi complimented and the beautiful smile he adore appears on his girlfriend’s face. She looked away , didn’t want to face his charming look.

“ Thank you ” Madi slowly answered. Levi pulled on her hips , backing her against his body

“ Come here ” he whispered between her lips. He hadn’t been able to kiss his girl since well too long for him. With the hormones playing with his head, he now needed some loving and affection mark. Madi made the first step and dropped a peck on his lips. They were just 16 and she didn’t want things… get a direction she wasn’t ready for. But Levi was just irresistible , and her hormones too was playing with her. He approached her lips again

“ What if your parent walk on us ?” said Madi . For her , it would be horrible if Derek and Ahsha walk on them , making out

“ Girl we’re fine , everyone is downstairs”

“ You’re driving me crazy Mr Roman ”

“ I know” smirked Levi

He crossed his arms on her back and kissed his girlfriend. At first , it was really wise and their lips just dance on each other .But when she placed a hands on his jaw , pushing him closer , Levi sense that she wanted to deepen the kiss. He undone his arms to crush them on her hips. As they continue to kiss , he gently pushed on her waist , making her make some step behind , while him was making step forward , to not broke the kiss. Before she knew it , she was lay down on his bed , him above her. He sucked her bottom lips before parted, completely. Levi made the both of them rolled , position his girl above him. To end , he just rest his palm on her backside , through her jean

“ Does Mr Roman plan to propose to me for prom ” said Madi. She doesn’t want to sound too desperate but she was a little worry than her boyfriend didn’t ask her yet

“ That again …”

Levi rolled his eyes. He didn’t want to go

“ But babe ” protested the girl “ that is super cool that we had been invited to the senior prom. All my friend are going ”

All her friend were already talking about dress shopping , hair cut while her was still wondering if she will have a wonderful night with her bae

“ My brother and sister are going to be there. How can I enjoy my night with my girl ”

It was just an excuse and Madi can feel it

“ We’re around them all the time”

“ Fine…” ceded Levi .He was hating the idea of wearing a suit and a tie but he could see to Madi face that it will please her. “ We should go then ”

“ Yay !!” cried out Madison , in joy

She dive into Levi’s mouth , kissing him with the tongue this time .

Ahsha passed in the corridor. It was bedtime and the all mansion was really silence. Everyone was in his own bedroom expect TJ who was sleeping over a friend’s place. The wife was on her way to join her man in their conjugal bed when she noticed the light coming from her daughter’s room

“ Mom Can I talk to you ? ” Maria asked , sit on her bed. She wasn’t sure if it was the right time or moment but she desperately need a girly , or more woman conversation.

“ Sure Maria.” smiled Ahsha , entering in the bedroom. She tighten her silk robe , not wanted her daughter see the lingerie she set for her father and sit on the edge of the bed. Maria raise her chest , sitting completely , her legs crossed under the cover “ Something wrong ”

“ I’m not sure. But we can talk right ?  you and I can have a conversation , between girls without dad have to know it ”

The daughter was looking down , playing with the material of her cover , like she was shy or…ashamed. Her question was putting Ahsha in front of a dilemma. Be loyal to her husband or her daughter. She seriously wanted to be there for her angel , especially when it was about woman question but she vows to Derek, years ago , during their marriage. She couldn’t make a firm promise

“ Maria I can’t promise you that angel” explained Ahsha “ If it’s serious enough or you’re in danger or one of your friend is in danger , I will have to talk about it to your dad for we can act and handle the situation like adult will”

Maria was warned , she knew the rule and felt a little released. Maybe her mother won’t say it to Derek

“ Mom it’s not about that…it’s girl talk . I’m not ready for dad to know that already ”

“ I’ll see. Now tell me . You’re worry me ”

Ahsha wasn’t sure about it , but her mother instinct already sent her couple clue. Like the fact she was really worry , she didn’t want for Derek to know. She won’t be the first one to say it but… it was about sex

“ I’m not virgin anymore ” announced Maria , that clear and straight . Honestly , the mother wasn’t expecting that at all. When she thought about sex , she thought Maria will have couple question like ’ When do you know you’re ready ’ or some contraception stuff .Not in a million year that she wasn’t virgin anymore. She tried her best to not appears shocked but it was just a tentative. Maria looked at her mother facial expression , it didn’t miss. What put Ahsha in the complete confusion was where the conversation was going since the…thing was already done

“Ok…and how ? ” Ahsha hesitated “ I mean ….you have question or…”

In fact she wanted to scream ’ HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY ’ . Ahsha hoped they will talk about her first time, how it happened , with who , if she had been in too much pain , talk about the consequence of the sex. In fact Ahsha needed to know which kind of girl she was having in front of her , the traumatized one or the curious one. Did she need advice or be comforted ?

“ No it’s not that” spoke Maria . She was feeling a lot more comfortable. Now that the new dropped and her mother didn’t whoop her ass , she guess Ahsha was taking it pretty well. He entire secret could be reveal now “ I actually told to aunt Kyle and she bring me to the gynecologist .They already gave me the contraception and danger of the sex speech .It isn’t why I’m telling you that ”  

“ Why ?” spitted Ahsha. Right now, she was keeping a lot inside. It wasn’t in her intention to scare Maria but right now , Ahsha was having a lot to talk about

“ A year ago , I did it with Shaun” started Maria “ It went well but we never been together . It just happened but we never been together. With what happened with Dani it make me think. I never slept with Dani , yes we were a little flirting but nothing that far. Who is interesting me is Liam. We’re seeing each other since months and it’s great. We see each other out the high school  , sometime going on date. We’re having sex , often , and it’s great too but I’m not sure of where we stand. Are we a couple or just friend with benefit. I really like him , and spend time with him. But when I’m talking to him about being together , publically , he become all weird , stuttering. Plus with the sex , he can make me do whatever he want. I just love being in his arms and… that is a little awkward but you always had been very opened so I feel like I can tell you about that. I really love have sex with him , sense him. I don’t know what to do. Prom is coming and I’m waiting on him to ask me to go with him . Do you think he is using me ? For sex ?”

More Maria was talking and more Ahsha’s eyes opened in big , more her visage froze. She lost her composure , inside of her . She was speechless , without voice and her daughter clearly saw it

“ Mom…Mother ? Are you ok ? Am I disgusting you ?” she asked

It was the electroshock the mother needed. The fact Maria thought possible to disgust her mother hurt Ahsha. Her daughter was here , for a woman/woman conversation , for woman advice and certainly not being judge by her mother .Ahsha raise Maria’s chin with her fingertips , forcing her to look up . She prepared her respond, re evaluate the situation Maria was into

“ No of course not” said Ahsha “ Sex have nothing disgusting. You wouldn’t be here if I was still virgin. It’s just …I wasn’t expecting that. I’m a little surprised that is all. For your situation… I can’t tell you. I’m not into Liam ’s head and I can’t tell you what is his intention, or what is your. Do you like this boy , out of the sex aspect ”

“ I think I do”

“ Did you ever see what your …relation with him was going with…less sex ”

“ It’s still great but..I don’t know .The sex add something really exciting between us. When school went really busy and we need to focus , we decided to have a sex break but…I couldn’t ”

“Ok..OK” interrupted Ahsha “ The best advice that I can give to you is that you two need a conversation. A serious conversation about the future of your relationship. I know how hard it’s to control sexual urge and not take them in consideration into big decision when they shouldn’t be. Believe me , even adult sometime can’t. But if you’re worried about just being a sexual object for him , you need to put the sex apart and establish base , rules , see if you guys have the same intention”

Ahsha stand up , all she wanted was to run away from this room before crack .She feel it mounting in her . That was the best she can do in this situation. She said what she would have say to any other girl who came to her with this kind of situation. Even if this time , the girl was her own daughter

“ Thank you mom. I thought you will go crazy but I needed to ask. Are you going to tell it to dad ”

“ It’s isn’t to me to tell him angel. But I can give you as advice to talk to him. If you want to be taken as a young woman , you should go to him in order to have a conversation , between adult. You know the man that he is , out the fact he is your father ,he can tell you a lot about how men and boys see the sex. In a way I can’t , because I’m a woman ”

The mother needed to the conversation to end RIGHT NOW. Without being too brutal. She hugged Maria and walked to the exit , as normal and fast that she can  

As soon Ahsha was out of view from her daughter, all she couldn’t say to her baby girl face, all kind of emotion attacked the mother. She literally felt her heart getting broken and she almost ran in her bedroom, and then the bathroom. Derek was lat down on the bed and she wasn’t sure he heard her but Ahsha turned on the water from the bathroom sink. The last thing she wanted was that Derek heard her fall apart and worse asking why. Her hands were shaking and the tears intensified. Ahsha didn’t understand right the way what was happening but right now her heart was completely broken , the water falling from down her eyes prevent her to see clearly. Her pulse beat fast. She was in distress. All the kind of word Maria had earlier in somehow hurt Ahsha. Her baby girl wasn’t a baby girl anymore. But what disappointed Ahsha wasn’t the fact Maria wasn’t virgin anymore. What was making her cry was how she lost her virginity . All women was dreaming about having a first time with a charming prince , in beautiful condition with rose petal and chocolate. Girls were dreaming about a romantic first time , apparently Maria just had sex with only God know who , a guy she wasn’t with , and still isn’t with. Ahsha was a hundred years away to imagine that Maria wasn’t virgin anymore but a thousand more to figure out that her daughter was sexually active, more than that , really , too much comfortable with her sexuality. Ahsha was wondering where she failed , in her education with her daughter, because all she could heard was the girl’s word , and how much she was loving being some guy sexual toy. Worse , how she was loving sex and have sex.  She didn’t want that for her daughter, she was just 18 years old and there she is wondering if she prefer love than sex .Ahsha thought of how young Maria was still , how ignorant and dump those kids can be with the act. She wasn’t totally disappointed because it some way Maria had been dealing the situation and her new condition of sexual active woman with maturity. She consulted a gynecologist , to what Ahsha know she wasn’t pregnant or unprotect and reckless. But still . The worse was her fear . Ahsha was terrified that her own daughter become one of those women , dependant to sex and men , taking her decision toward men , locked herself in house to welcome a husband , give up to her dreams, aspiration and ambition for a man and physical satisfaction. An orgasm last couple second , a minute in the best case , a life was last years , and years. Ahsha passed her hand on her visage and hair , clearly it up , and she faced her reflection in the mirror More than that , through her red and inflated eyes , she saw her regrets. She never regrets her choice toward her sexuality , she never been the kind of sleep with the first came , always had been in serious relationship…but no man even satisfy her like her husband do. No one make her feel the way her husband make her feel during the sex. She never been more blessed by another man. Her husband was the man of her life. In a perfect world , she wished have give her virginity to this man , she wished would have the honor to say that she only knew her husband, just one man and it was the man of her life .But it was too late for her, and too late for her daughter now. She wasn’t ashamed , not at all but she wish Derek would have been the only one. That was the thought making her sad, she wish she hadn’t waste her time with some fuckboy and  not be her with her true man earlier. She wished he was the only one she kissed , the only one she touched. Right now , her life was all about that , her husband was having her entire exclusivity and it was feeling so good since all those years that Ahsha was regretting now living like that since she exist. A little knock sound and Ahsha barely heard it

“ Ahsha ” asked a male voice . That voice she was loving so much . That too , Ahsha wish she would have just hear this voice moan and groan and not another man. The door of the bathroom slowly opened , Derek entering discovering the machination.

“Oh shit you’re crying ” he exclaimed , turning the water off. Why hide in the bathroom , to cry instead of come to him , looking for her husband assistance “ What are you doing Ahsha ? What is wrong babe ?”

He came in front of her and put his hand on her arms . He wasn’t sure if he was allowed to hugs her and fully take his wife into his arms

“ No…noth…nothing ” stammered Ahsha , snuffing. She was still shacking. Derek leaned to be at the same level that Ahsha’s face

“ Baby look at me ” he begged , raising her chin “  Look at me in the eyes . You can’t lie to me .I’m your husband and I can see in your eyes , through those tears that you’re not ok. So please tell me what is going on my love ”

If Ahsha was coming to the source of it, she will have to tell him what her daughter told him and it was betrayed her trust.

“ I.. I” she fought the tears but be in the presence of her man actually make it worse and she cried again, her head suddenly fell on his shoulder as her knees became weak. Derek catches her body , totally powerless in front of his woman distress

“ Ok , ok ” he concluded “ just come here. You’re not oblige to tell me right now ”

He kneel and totally carry her in his arms , laying her body between his arms. He was still having all his strength and Ahsha left the floor , completely. Her legs support by his arm , her head support by the other one. Like she was weightless , Derek walked to their bed “ Let’s go in our bed , I’ll just rock your body to sleep ”

He was calm , confused. But he tried his best to comfort his wife. If he only knew about Maria…

So… I know it can be a little messy and confusing but there is a recap. Ahsha and Derek had Maria (18years old) a month after Terrence also became the father of TJ(18 years). Since the mother doesn’t want it, and Derek and Terrence are like brother , Terrence, Derek and Ahsha raise Maria and TJ , before Dersha’s second child , Levi (16 years old ) born. This little family is now made by teenager and three adults. Derek and Terrence are still playing for the Los Angeles Devil when Ahsha owe the Devil girl and a famous dance studio in LA. Of course , the story will also contain Pete and Sloane as grandparents and Kyle

Thank for reading, Merci d’avoir lu

Udi Hrant - Can All Times Be One?: Solo, Duo & Trio Performances From 1950s Independent U​.​S. Labels

For this week’s Bandcamp Monday, I’m back on Canary Records’ page, digging into more treasures from the past. These are absolutely beautiful recordings of the master oudist Udi Hrant.  

The details: “Born blind, Hrant Kenkulian (b. 1901; d. Aug. 29, 1979) was one of the most innovative, influential, and virtuosic oudists of the 20th century … Harold Hagopian, the son of one of Hrant’s key students Richard Hagopian, issued nearly four hours of Hrant’s music about a decade ago. This collection seeks to expand on his collections by re-releasing another hour heart-rendingly beautiful material recorded by Hrant during his time in the U.S. for the Aris, Near East, Hrant, Smyrnaphon, and Yildiz labels (in order of appearance).”

so here’s what’s happening. i’m sitting in a philosophy class that i signed up for about half an hour ago lmao. after it ends i have 15 minutes to get myself to the other side of campus for that vector class. i’ll probably be late but anyway. i’ll go to both and decide at the end of the week which one i want to stick with.


Today, I finally mustered enough courage to talk to my music teacher about TMK and to my surprise, she said she actually likes his music and the deep timbre of his voice. I was really, really, really surprised, and more than that, really really happy. From whatever I had gathered from her opinions and stances so far about music and musicians, I thought she would be one of those people who blindly write off people like him who dare to experiment in a space where it is frowned upon. But I was so glad to have had that conversation with her about a half hour ago. (self-taught lesson 1: try to be even less judgemental) I told her that I know a few people who talk about him without even understanding what he does and that I am still trying to understand his music. (self-taught lesson 2: don’t show off like you know everything when in reality (especially about music which takes years of dedication and commitment and passion and practice and understanding) what you know is not even close to a beginning. Listen carefully what a knowledgeable person has to say and give yourself some time to explore and understand what you think about it. Be humble. Be true to yourself first). She even told me she would send me a list of varnas and raagas that he has experimented with. I am so happy, I want to learn and understand better.

Also, I loved my mandrasthaayi varase lessons today. She said that I am getting better at controlling my breath and it was so reassuring to hear that from my guru.

@the-persistance-of-memory, you will be happy to know that my music teacher likes TMK. I will share the list with you, too. I am sure you would have listened to most of them already, but still… I am a big pile of love and joy and curiosity today.

i get very hungry late at night because of poor life decisions and i am absolutely fucking rapacious with a painful inability to sleep on an empty stomach

in the hours when dinner happened a quarter of a day ago, im very glad when theres food downstairs of any acceptable sort i will take it all and eat it at my desk like an awful raccoon albeit not quite so messy

my life is a sad thing to behold

Just found the post where it happened, but @askdoratonks tagged me in it a while ago and I’m bored so here we go~ Thanks Jes, sorry it took so long!

Answer 10, tag 10!

1. Last movie you saw: Kubo and the Two Strings! amazing movie, definitely recommend it, really fantastic work

2. Last song you listened to: “Sun is Shining” by Axwell and Ingrosso

3. Last show you watched: Scorpion, I’ve been watching with my dad

4. Last book you read: Half a King by Joe Abercrombie-totally judged this one by the cover when I bought it, and I’m gonna burn through the sequel in the next couple days~

5. Last thing you ate: Eggs, I had breakfast a couple hours ago ^.^

6. If you could be anywhere right now, where would you be: I dont know, a lot of places come to mind…. Thailand sticks out the most, I really really want to go back

7. Where would you time travel to: uhhhh I dont know that I would? Time continuum isn’t really something I want to mess with, ya know~

8. The first thing you would do with lottery money: Pay off all my parents loans ngl

9. Fictional character you would hang out with for a day: oh that’s a tricky one… This time around I think I’d pick Minerva McGonagall bc I just read a really good post about her~

10. Time right now: 1:20 PM

Tagging: @breathe-the-sky @kroganpancakes @egotisticalextraterrestrial @sawyerraynesme @ohtheclevernessofme1972 @askthatwolfboy @aliceofwonders @jellyfishjubilee @fragrantradiance @blaerbear
Provocolate: Molyvos is the Greece of your Dreams (and hopefully, your best self).

When you think of your perfect, ideal Greece, you’re probably actually thinking of Molyvos, home to all of Greece’s perfections, double distilled. This is the jaw dropping gorgeous sun soaked Greece of turquoise seas and bright painted boats, tavernas with checkered tablecloths and octopus legs hanging from fishing line, white-washed stairs, roses and bougainvilla climbing trellises, villages on hillsides, the Aegean glimpsed like a dream though an open window.

Picture postcard picturesque perfection. Our first glimpse of the city? Giorgos our host stops the truck for us to get a shot of the city because we are oohing and ahhiing

There it is- a seaside fairy tale with a castle on top. This is our first morning in Lesvos. Two hours ago we were drinking a coffee on Aegean. This is surreal, and it’s not like we’re not used to beautiful places; we all live in Greece already, and write about travel (Travel Bloggers Greece) and culture and beautiful experiences. None of us have been in Molyvos and we’ve all been looking forward to it; it is a fabled place.

A couple more turns in the road and we are there climbing out of the truck and wandering up the cobblestone paved hill, shaded by an arbor, and lined with cafes and shops.