it-gets-worse-before-it-gets-better

Um, wow Pearl… Anything else you want to tell us?

Woah. Look at how small they are compared to that giant thorn ball. That’s a big ol’ mess right there.

“Look at them, they’re a mess without her guidance. Directionless, pathetic, clinging things.”

Are you sure you’re only talking about the thorns here, Pearl? I mean, you are literally clinging to Garnet’s arm…

UGH I heard that one. This is going to be a close call, isn’t it? I mean, I know the show wouldn’t kill off one of the main characters like that, but it does seem to be getting worse before it gets better…

☠️ “Fuck Me Up” Spell ☠️

this is a “universe i’m ready to take like five curveballs right now for the assurance it will all end well. just fuck me up right now” spell. 

☠️  gather: tarot cards, five things that symbolize yourself and your situation, five candles, as well as bay leaf, coffee grounds, basil, and storm water.

☠️  perform in as much darkness as you are comfortable with. 

☠️  create a pentagram, and at each point place a token of something that represents a key aspect of your personality.

☠️  light a corresponding candle by each.

☠️  with the bay leaf, coffee ground, and basil, combine into a mixture. burn a pinch of the mixture over each candle.  

☠️  speak of, or meditate on the subject of each representative object, and how it has been hindering you. think on the ways it may have to get worse before it can get better.

☠️  select tower and chariot cards from the deck, fan them out and place them in the center.

☠️  utter the incantation to the universe once you have gathered all the energies and intents you need, “just fuck me up” 

☠️  extinguish the candles one by one using the storm water. 

anonymous asked:

i've only watched a handful of episodes so far but I don't like tiberius that much? he's an okay character it's just some of his actions feel about godmoddy to me

oh boy. yeah tibs is, mmmmm, polarizing? orion’s a hard player to watch.

if you don’t mind spoilers, I recommend checking out @percyvex‘s meta about tibs/orion here cause it lays out the various issues with the player/character. if you do mind spoilers, it’s not just you, don’t worry

nicememerino  asked:

How do you talk to my therapist about hElping you? I'm not even sure how she's suppose to "help" me. Everytime I go we just sit there and tell her what happened since I saw her last. I don't think it's helping me and it's wasting her time so how do I approach my therapist about it?

Hi baby 💝 You’ve been sooo patient, so thank you. I think it’s really important that you are able to identify and acknowledge when a resource is no longer serving its purpose, so good on you darling. 

Signs that it’s time to change therapists:

• You feel judged or shamed.
• You feel uncomfortable.
• You feel a lack of connection.
• You feel a lack of progress.
• A lack of boundaries.
• You’re compromising your beliefs.
• Your therapist is consistantly late to appointments and / or cancelling.
• Your therapist talks mainly about themselves and / or gets distracted consistantly.
• Your therapist takes sides.
• Your therapist uses victim-blaming and / or other offensive language.

It has been 12 years since I personally began therapy; I have been to 7 different therapists in this time, and only recently found a therapist that actually worked for me. I never knew how comfortable I could be and how much progress I could actually make in therapy before I met her. I’m sharing this because I think it’s important to remember that finding a good therapist can take some time. Just don’t give up !!!

How to make the most out of therapy:

  • Think about your goals for therapy, and share them with your therapist. I wrote a little guide on setting goals if you want to check it out. 
  • Be as brutally honest as possible about your experiences and feelings. This can be tough to do on the spot or if you disagree with something your therapist says. Fear of judgement is often something that makes me hesitate to open up about an issue I have- but being direct about it will strengthen the relationship, contribute to recovery and make you feel better.
  • Put in work outside of therapy. Reflect on what you’ve talked about. Consider checking out self help books from the library, keep a private journal, try new coping techniques, do some creative exercises, research relevant topics to expand your knowledge, start a free workbook, etc.
  • Be curious. Ask any question that comes to mind during your session. Don’t censor yourself.
  • If you come up with any questions outside of therapy, don’t be afraid to write them down and bring them up in your next session.
  • Set your appointments for times that work for you, and try to show up a little bit early so you can unwind before your session. I personally get anxious when waiting so I practice deep breathing in the waiting room. Try to forget the clock during your session.
  • Keep your health related resources in a safe place such as a binder or folder. I can’t stress it enough how much this has helped me outside of therapy.

Important things to remember:

• You don’t have to share everything with every therapist unless you are comfortable to.
• Sometimes things can get worse before they get better.
• Therapy is no quick fix.
• A therapist cannot “save” anyone, but they will help bring light to your own wisdom and your ability to recover.
• Attending therapy does not make you weak or flawed. It is nothing to be ashamed of.
• Not every session will feel like a breakthrough.
• Therapy is a service for you. This is about you, for you.

Extra links:

recommended books
self help
recovering without professional help
app masterlist by RecoveryIsBeautiful
more advice

I truly wish you luck, darling. You deserve a good support system. 🌷💕

A few highlights from Shadowhunters at SDCC

During an interview with Entertainment Weekly:

-Matt and Harry talked about how Malec is beautiful, and how they love portraying the characters and that relationship. (PS: Matt is especially defensive of Malec, and it’s adorable.)

-When asked about Clary’s love life, Kat said Clary was currently focusing on work instead.

-Finally, each cast member was asked to give one word for their character in the reason of season 2.  Dom: heartbreak. Kat: fatality. Luke: tea. Alberto: complication. Emeraude: finding herself. Harry: mistrust. Matt: frustration.

During the Shadowhunters panel:

-A teaser for the rest of 2B aired, and oh, so many things are going to happen.

-Sarah Hyland is playing the Seelie Queen in two episodes of Shadowhunters 2B.  Check out a scene with her here!

-Kat mentioned wanting Church to be on the show, which prompted Dom to suggest Rajah and Stella play Church and Chairman Meow and Matt to object to waiting to act on a cat.

-Emeraude talked about Izzy’s journey to find herself again after everything she’s gone through.

-Matt, Dom, and Kat talked about Clace. Kat: Jace and Clary have always been there for each other. Matt: there’s nothing stopping them from being together than themselves. Dom: It’s going to get worse before it gets better.

-Matt gave an eloquent reason as to why Malec is relatable.  

-The cast is very protective of their characters and doesn’t like it when people say mean things about them.  (See: Matt, Dom and the cast generally)

-Both Jordan and Lilith are going to be in season 3.

-Season 3A will track City of Fallen Angels.

-Maia Wainwright (Maia) is a series regular for season 3!

Suggestion for everyone: turn shout chat off when Early Access begins.

People are gonna spoil Stormblood MSQ. People are gonna start shout fights because they want attention. People are gonna be huge trolls, because we’re on the internet and anonymity empowers idiots. Save yourself the trouble by turning shout (and maybe even yell) off in your general chat tab. If you think you’re in a LS that could end up with spoilers or griefing, turn it off as well.

Hells, I have mine off right now because people are intentionally picking bullshit arguments just to make a scene, and it’s going to get worse before it gets better. Save yourself the trouble and blood pressure and don’t give the assholes a chance to ruin it for you.

Here Comes March.

1. hidup adalah penerimaan. sekuat manapun kamu membantah dan selama pun kamu bersedih, itu takkan mengubah hakikat yang sesuatu telah terjadi. dan tiada apa yang kamu boleh lakukan kecuali menangisinya dan membantah tanpa mengubah apa pun. maka kesatlah air mata. bersedia untuk yang akan datang. biarkan yang berlalu. kerana hidup adalah penerimaan.

2. before getting frustrated at a situation remember that you never know Allah plans for you in the future. stay strong.

3. mendung di langit, mentari akan menghapuskan ; mendung dalam hati, doa sebagai cahaya.

4. it’s hard to ask a heart from someone. so don’t. ask it from God, always.

5. nak minta apa-apa, minta pada Tuhan, bukan merayu pada manusia.

6. we all hurt in some way. but stop crying, and keep trying, keep praying.

7. jangan ingat orang yang kita suka tu akan suka kita sebagaimana kita suka kat dia. jadi jangan suka-suka, suka kat orang yang kita suka.

8. all you need to do is just hand it all to Him and He’ll take care of it all and give you, without doubt, what is best for you.

9. kalau datang cinta, jangan gembira sangat. mungkin itu ujian untuk menguji hati.

10. the world is changing. people are changing. environment are changing. the only way to not get hurt, is to learn how to change.

11. kita tak mahu sedar dengan segala perubahan sekeliling. itu yang sering membuat kita lupa, kehendak orang tak sama dengan kehendak kita, hati orang tak sama dengan hati kita, fikiran orang tak sama dengan fikiran kita. dan itu, selalu buat kita terluka kerana harapan kita supaya orang mengerti apa yang kita rasa, seringkali tersasar.

12. even if the sun doesn’t appear after the rain, you got to keep walking, because you realize that Allah is always with you.

13. ada sebab Allah menjadikan jalan hidup ini begini begitu. ada benda yang kita tak dapat walau kita cuba sehabis baik. dan itu bukan hukuman. Allah nak kita terus sabar.

14. life is too short to regretting and blaming others. live a happy life.

15. walau sekarang kita semua ditimpa dengan perkara-perkara yang tak baik saya harap nanti kita akan ketemu kebaikan. tak sekarang, nanti.

16. there are times when it seemed like we wanted to just give up, but we already this far. hold your love, take courage, and keep survive.

17. memaafkan untuk tenang.

18. there will come a time where we are going to receive the love we deserve. be patient and stay strong.

19. kadang kita bertanya kenapa kita belum dapat apa yang kita nak. mungkin sebab Tuhan tahu kita belum mampu untuk bertanggungjawab terhadap apa yang kita mahu.

20. maybe nothing ever turned out as we planned. yes, there are things we don’t understand. but we need to just keep on living, keep on praying.

21. right now we are alive & things just keep going. kenapa asyik fikir pasal benda yang dah lepas? say alhamdulillah. be better for tomorrow.

22. maybe things will get worse before they get better. to teach you something. always. have faith in HIM.

23. the aching will fade. things are going to get better or hurt less, over time. find Allah. talk to Him.

24. hidup ni perjalanan. mungkin sekarang awak kehilangan, tapi siapa tahu, di hadapan sana, ada yang lebih baik buat awak?

25. nothing lasts forever, either happiness or sorrow.

26. terlalu mengenang, sebab tu tak nampak hikmah di masa depan. cipta kenangan baru, lepaskan yang dah tak boleh diubah.

27. we always have time to decide. just because we don’t get what we want, doesn’t mean that we are already late. it’s all about time. so have faith in HIM. always.

- sederhanaindah

p/s : times flies so fast. what ever we do, where ever we are, stay good!

On Editing

This was forwarded to me by a former colleague who attended a course on how to publish/edit a book. You probably already know most of these tips, but there might be something you’ll find helpful, who knows…

QUESTIONS TO ASK DURING FIRST PHASE OF EDITING

GENERAL STRUCTURE OF THE BOOK (what the story is and how it is being told):

  • What is the book about? What is the driving force behind the narrative?
  • Who is the audience for this book?
  • Is it based on real experience?
  • Does the story work? Are there any parts that feel unconvincing or where the narrative drags? 
  • Are there any parts I don’t understand?
  • What is the trajectory or the shape of the story?
  • Does the story start in the right place?
  • How quickly do I become immersed in the book?
  • Are there any points where my immersion in the story is broken, or I lose interest?
  • Do I believe in what I’m reading?
  • How satisfying is the ending? Does it feel inevitable?
  • Does it feel like anything is missing?
  • Is there anything extraneous (characters, detail, unnecessary plot points)?
  • What is the narrative point of view (first person, second person, third person)? Does it change? Is it consistent? Does it work? What might be lost or gained if the story were told another way?
  • Is the tense consistent? If it changes, is it necessary?
  • Does coincidence feature as a plot device? If so, is there another way to engineer the same events?

Keep reading

  • what she says: i'm fine
  • what she means: okay, everybody shut the fuck up a minute I have something to say. listen just because something burns bright doesn't mean it's gonna burn forever. so all these people around you saying you got so much further to go, it's going to get worse before it gets better, I don't know. I don't if that true. you know, thanks so much for coming and on this next part, let's sing it all together

excerpts from what i call my “yikes” file:

-“things are going to get worse before they get better.” the depression of realizing you are not in survival mode any more. the depression of the baroque. the depression not of things being in pieces, but of things being halfway put together and still not done.

-horror movie about the process of realizing that people’s extreme personas are not fake and no set of magical words will unlock a “real” person underneath

-brutality of “these people mean the most to me in the world and they’re not even that great”

-embarrassing sexual overconfidence of the newly sexually initiated

-inability to predict whether you will even like your own children as people

-slow despair of knowing you have no way to behave in a chronic situation that is both joyful and moral

-the knowledge that you are missing out on fundamental emotional experiences and have no way of acquiring them. 

More than simply motivation for spiritual practice, tuning into suffering is spiritual practice! Many people start meditating and then get frustrated with how much suffering and pain they experience, never knowing that they are actually starting to understand something. They cling to the ideal that insight practices will produce peace and bliss and yet much of what they find is suffering. They don’t realize that things on the cushion tend to get worse before they get better. Thus, they reject the very truths they must deeply understand to obtain the peace they were looking for and thus get nowhere. They reject their own valid insights that they have obtained through valid practice. I suspect that this is one of the greatest and most common stumbling blocks on the spiritual path.
—  Daniel Ingram
Monster

Genre: ANGST

Word Count: 881

Summary/Prompts: i swear i was gonna resolve this rn but thanks to the brainstorming of @ace-anxiety-sanders it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better

continuation of Better This Way, His Kiddo, Wonderful Audience Member, and No One

@wikkedwolff @mira-jadeamethyst @genderqueerwriter @goshdarndingdang @finiteframe3 @frustratedwaffle @queerweare  @analogically-prinxiety @polysandershell @prinxietys @zoeyheys @inalandofmythandtimeofmagic @thebaagelboy @vampyrsarah @deafinitelyfangirling @z4rylynn


One week had passed since Anxiety had told the other about what he’d done. One week had passed since he’d seen the others. One week had passed and no one had been at his door.

As a result, Anxiety had fallen onto his bed and hadn’t gotten up except to drink a bit of water and use the bathroom.

He’d heard their voice plenty of times as they passed by the door, snippets of conversation floating over to him.

“…we should go to…”

“…I don’t want anything to do with…”

“…can’t just leave it like this…”

“…Thomas is falling again…”

“I’m going to him.” Patton’s voice rang clear with authority. “And neither of you can tell me otherwise. Oldest makes the rules.” Patton never played his status as “eldest” because it wasn’t fair to the rest of us, but whenever there was something serious, he’d whip it out lightning fast.

When Patton knocked, Anxiety looked up from the wall, mildly surprised. He was sure he’d been in bed before, but now here he was in his chair.

He sighed and slumped further into his chair. It didn’t matter anyway.

Patton knocked again, and when he didn’t receive and answer, he said, “Anxiety. I’m coming in.”

The worst part of the whole ordeal was that Anx’s door had been unlocked the entire time. It was the small way he let the others know that he didn’t want to be alone again, but none of them took the invitation.

Anxiety could have grimaced at the face Patton was making. It was like he was looking at a corpse, but he maybe he was. Anx hadn’t eaten in days and drank only the water he’d had left in his room. He’d been awake for the last day and a half since his mind refused to quiet.

Patton knelt down in front of him, taking his cold hands in his warm ones. “I’m so sorry, An. I’m sorry we didn’t see this before.”

“Why are you crying?” Anx’s hoarse voice caused Patton’s tears to fall faster. “You didn’t do anything.”

“That’s why. We never did anything when we should have. We should have noticed.”

“Patton, it’s not your fault.” Prince leaned against the door frame and Anx immediately dropped his eyes. “He brought this on himself.”

“Roman,” Logan appeared, completely blocking the door. “We have no time for your posturing. Think of Thomas.”

Of course. If Anxiety ever got like this, it affected Thomas and the others. Thomas’s cloudy thoughts didn’t really leave room for logical thoughts and creativity. It was amazing what he had forgotten in the small time he didn’t feel like a dead weight.

However, as he looked at Patton, he felt almost better. There was a reason Patton was portrayed as the dad character. He was kind and supportive—never demeaning anyone. Being near him was like being engulfed in a warm embrace that was never suffocating, only comforting.

Roman sighed. “It would mean a great deal to us if would join us for a movie.”

He didn’t mean it. He never meant anything except the insults, but this was more than him. He had to think of the others, especially Patton. If Patton was down, then Thomas would be nothing more than a shell of a person.

He slouched out of the chair and nearly passed out from the dizzy spell.

“You haven’t eaten in days,” Patton said, wrapping an arm around Anx’s waist. “Let’s get some food in you.”

Logan led the charge to the kitchen while Roman went into the living room to set up the movie.

Patton was grinning ear to ear as he donned his apron: Hug The Cook. “What would you like?”

Anx shrugged. He wasn’t even hungry, but Patton probably wouldn’t rest until he was fed. “Anything is fine.”

“Here,” Logan handed him a glass of water. “You’re showing clear signs of dehydration.”

“Thanks,” Anx mumbled into the glass.

He turned to Patton. “Make something small for right now. Since he hasn’t eaten in days, it would be bad if he ate everything at once.”

“Macaroni it is!”

“Sit on the couch and wait.” Logan leaned against the counter. “Wait for us.”

Anxiety shuffled out to the living room and fell onto the couch, rubbing his temples as a headache started up. The living room was far too bright for his taste, even though there was only a lamp on.

Roman plopped down near him, crossing his arms. Anx flashed back to last week where he was wrapping a cut on his arm and smiling and talking to him like a normal person while Drew was bandaging her own wounds. He’d smiled and laughed and Anxiety’s heart had never felt so light.

He wanted that again. He wanted to easy way Roman would smile. He wanted the way Roman said the words I love you because it had taken a moment to realize what he’d said. Anx shouldn’t have taken it to heart so much—Roman said he loved his cats all the time—but it was the first time anyone aside from Patton had said anything like that.

He’d give anything to hear it again.And that’s what made it all the more devastating when Roman said, “I really don’t like you, monster.”


PART ONE | PART TWO | PART THREE | PART FOUR | PART FIVE | PART SIX | PART SEVEN | PART EIGHT | PART NINE | PART TEN | PART ELEVEN | PART TWELVE

Yellow Healing- A Sirius Black Imagine

A/N: This is another requested imagine that at first I didn’t honestly know how to interpret. I’m never written anything about abuse, and I didn’t know how explicit to be as it can be awfully rough. So, I hope you guys don’t mind my take on it. It is kind of a bit of a different writing style and I think I actually really like it. Let me know what y’all think of it! Hope you enjoy, my lovelies! 

Request from Anon:  okay I asked cause I was thinking about reader x sirius where reader is really good friends with the marauders and being generally a very bubbly person (which is why sirius likes her so much) but one summer when she goes home she suffers abuse and go back to hogwarts with some bruises and a much sadder personality and all the marauders try to find out what’s happening and are the biggest sweethearts also reader and sirius bond over having suffered family abuse?

Originally posted by the-jamwich

At first, red.

The color of your stinging skin after it happened. The stains on the towels as you tried not to make a mess of the bathroom floor. Your bloodshot eyes after hours of crying yourself to sleep.

She didn’t mean to do it. You justified this as a slip of her hand, a rush of her temper before she could compose herself. It was the first time it happened, and you quickly dismissed it as being an outlying incident. Muggle violence was most definitely not a pureblood way, and it surely would not be repeated.

Red stayed for a week or so, only vaguely leaving a small form of itself as a scar on your skin where it stung and ran outside your body days prior.

Then, blue.

Keep reading

HOW-TO: ADDRESS THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM

STEP ONE: NAME IT AFTER SOMEONE YOU LOVE. or someone that loves you. whichever you’re better at driving away. this will make it both easier and harder to empathize with the creature in your bed but you can’t get rid of something that you can’t name. you can’t heal from something that you won’t vocalize. write it down once you’ve decided. realize that it won’t reach out of the page and strangle you. exhale.

STEP TWO: SAY THE NAME OUT LOUD WITHOUT CRINGING. this will hurt. your vocal cords will tighten with stress. your shoulders will meet your ears and enjoy the conversation so much that they’ll stay there, frozen, until your back pleads with them to come home. come home. now say it again. say it until it feels less like a wound and more like a loaded gun. the safety’s off, is this what you want? is this what you need?

STEP THREE: SCREAM. cry. buy dollar store wine glasses just to throw them on the floor. do what you need to because this is where you’ll begin to come to terms with the pent up anger this animal’s been obscuring. you were so busy looking at the blue, all of that sad ocean skin, that you forgot to point your finger towards the enemy. sometimes you need to look in the broken shards of what’s shattered and remind yourself that you’re the victim and this is not your fault. you can’t be blamed for the ugliness of your healing process when the thing you’re healing from is this persistent and invasive and completely uninvited. your recovery will never be more disgusting than the necessity it was born from.

STEP FOUR: STUDY THE ELEPHANT. sketch it, if you’re able. look at the curve of its trunk and the size of its feet and touch the tail once it doesn’t hurt your eyes to see, to understand. stroke the ears. kiss the head. your most intimate relationship will always be with the things that have hurt you. it’s the only sensation that’s yours, exclusively. you need to remember what the warning signs were before you turn the lights out, though. so pack a box with that knowledge and shove it in the closet. you won’t need it tomorrow. not until next winter, at least.

STEP FIVE: LET IT GO. you may read this and think, “if I could just let it go, it would’ve left by now.” and maybe that’s true. but maybe you have to rebreak bones so that they heal properly and maybe it has to get worse before it gets better. because at this point the elephant is begging to be released into the wild with the rest of the elephants. that’s right, the rest of them. because everybody has an elephant or two taking up space in their garage even if they don’t talk about it. but this isn’t about them, it never will be. this is about you and what you’ve had to live with. the thing you’ve spent so much time licking the cuts from. so, don’t bother to watch it leave. let it go. let it go.
let it go.

—  HOW-TO…, 13/30, Caitlin Conlon
our doubts are traitors (8/10, Assassins!AU, Yuri on Ice, Victuuri)

Does anyone remember how I said it’s going to get worse before it gets better

Alright, you’ve been warned

E n j o y

*thunder booms* *lightning cracks* *maniacal laughter*


our doubts are traitors

“Back then,” Yuuri asks. “Did you love me?”
The cigarette hangs low, tucked between Victor’s lips. The end glows steadily orange, devil eyes on a coal-black night.

(Some ghosts of your past you leave well alone.)

(Or: the powered assassins AU in which betrayal comes first, forgiveness second, and love was always somewhere in the equation.)

Read it on AO3 here.

Sometimes I wonder if there’s a time period on moving on. Does it matter how much you loved a person? Or how much you love yourself?
You have to get worse before you get better, I learned that.
I learned that I was all I had to pick me up off the floor at 3 in the morning when mascara mixed tears splattered the floor. And I was all I had to fight through it.
One day I was okay. I had felt love again. I smiled for no reason and people pointed out my happiness. But that love crumbled, too.
And I was right back to the beginning with myself.
“Don’t mention it to them. They don’t care. Keep it to yourself”
That’s what I told myself. And I tried my hardest not to bother anyone with my worries.
This time last year he had just met her. Now she’s his world.
These past few days have really broken me down and I honestly can’t say why.
I haven’t slept. I’ve stayed up all night crying about a boy who I told I didn’t love anymore. A boy who is completely in love with the other girl.
Today is five months without him. Five months that he’s been with her.
Why am I still crying about him? I have no idea what’s hurting me so much.
And it’s not fair. It’s not fair that her first love and my first love was the same person, but he loved her more.
It’s not fair that he’s happy and in love while I’m still trying to put myself back together.

And it’s not fair that I am still completely in love with him.
He doesn’t feel the same.

—  {via cheerupsavvy}