it's so hot it's ever so hot

Friendly reminder

That our favourite commander scrubs up real nice!

“He was out of his fighting clothes and armour, sporting a black tunic cut to show off that warrior’s body. His black hair had been brushed and smoothed, and even his wings looked cleaner. His siphons remained - a metal, fingerless gauntlet that stretched beneath the tailored sleeves of his jacket.”

Originally posted by damnyouqueen

EULOGY FOR AMERICA

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to say our goodbyes to our dear friend America, who died recently after a brief, intense battle with fascism and a long, slow battle with carbs. Thank you all for coming out to help say farewell. It’s not easy. But at least America died doing what it loved most: deep-frying Halloween candy while white men tried to explain to women what jazz is.

America was sick for a really long time. In the early stages, I think we were all in denial. You could tell that America was unwell—public displays of brutality, deeply internalized prejudice, “Entourage”—but it seemed curable. Just a case of plain old electile dysfunction. We thought that we’d caught the fascism early, but, as we now know, it had metastasized. America was more Florida than country by the end.

America was born right here, in America, and lived here its entire life. America was always about family. It is survived by its similarly ill father, Britain, and its large brood of children: baseball, Google, fireworks, losing your fingers to fireworks, giving your Uber driver only four stars because he talked to you, thinking granola is healthy, Chicago (the place), “Chicago” (the musical), “Chicago” (the movie adaptation of the musical), Chicago (the band), “Chicago Fire,” “Chicago Med,” “Chicago P.D.,” “Chicago Justice,” “Chicago ‘Chicago’ ” (a show about the Chicago production of the musical “Chicago,” coming to NBC this fall), and a bunch of wars.

I’d personally be nowhere without America. America was there when I was born, when I got married, when I saw Janet Jackson’s nipple at the Super Bowl. Remember that? After that happened, none of us slept for days, because we had never seen the pointy part of a boob on our TVs before, and it really upset us. America was really cool that way. It would always get mad when you’d see the pointy part of a boob on a TV. I’m gonna miss that.

However, we should not dwell on the loss of our dear country, friend, and place where all the Cheesecake Factories and Lids stores are. Today, let’s celebrate America’s life, and remember all of the remarkable things it accomplished and how many actors playing Spider-Man who keep getting cuter and younger were inside of it. America gave us so much. And, boy, did it look good for its age. America was two hundred and forty-one years old when it died, but it didn’t look a day over a hundred and sixty-four! It looked so young, it could’ve been the very same America that put its own citizens in internment camps!

America got a bunch of things really right. Mostly how to put food inside other food. Anyone can just eat a chicken. But in a duck?! In a turkey?! In a gun?! No one is going to forget the Turduckenun any time soon. America was so inventive that way. And, I mean, everyone does silly stuff when they’re young. America was beautiful, too. Sure, it was a little lumpy, and you could always see its Florida through its pants, but it just got hotter with age. So hot. It was so, so hot by the time it died. Almost too hot to live in.

If there’s anything we should take away from this tragedy, it’s that you should always check yourself for fascism, especially around your midsection. It’s easy enough to do in the shower. If you catch it early, it can be cleared up with a rigorous regimen of local elections and books and yoga. But America was cocky. Nothing bad had ever happened to it before! It assumed this fascism would pass, just like the Second World War and “Entourage” had.

What a shame. America was just the best damn country in the whole U.S.A. I’m sorry that I’m getting choked up. I get really emotional when I think of America, and also I took too big of a bite of Turduckenun and it got lodged in my windpipe. We will all miss America greatly. Every time I see an American flag or a gun, I’ll think of America. But we can all rest easy knowing America is in a better place now: Russia.

its au time you sons of hecks

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ー( ´ ▽ ` )ノ

Dean finding a picture of old Castiel, fem!Castiel, not knowing that this is Cas. And going on and on about her beauty.

“Holy shit Cas, who is this hot chick? Damnn.”

and the thing is, Dean would only be talking about her eyes. How blue they are, how he’s a sucker for blue eyes in general, how that beige coat just emphasises the BLUE in her eyes even more.

Dean writing an ode to the woman’s beauty, before Cas quietly says, “that’s me. Was me. This is my old vessel.”

Dean pausing immediately, “this is…you?” Because he realises that he basically spent the last 10 minutes describing, in excruciating detail, how hot his best friend is to his best friend.

Dean wanting to act casual about it and saying “Oh, man, great job. That’s a good vessel you picked. That’s. Um. Yeah. Good…good choice.”

Dean hastily adding, “Not that you, you know, did a bad job with your current vessel or anything. Jimmy’s great, like, in terms of, as in, body-wise. I mean, same blue eyes, right? Uh. And well-built, too. Sturdy. He’s, I mean you, you’re, you’re good looking now too. Um.”

Dean finally just blurting out “basically what I wanna say is that you’ve always been hot, cas.” before bolting the fuck out

Cas, still not having said anything other than the original clarification, just staring after him with confused comprehension, furrowed brow, squinty eyes, and a cocked head.

Sam accidentally witnessing this exchange and laughing till his stomach hurts.

i wish i could do things right and i wish i had motivation to get up

i happened upon this picture of Melissa bts and it’s just…too much??? like. the tshirt?? cradling the tiny precious dog?! and look at her fucking arm. i mean i really have a soft spot for athletes lol but are you joking?? get this away from me.

headcanon that ronan gets gansey very drunk one night and in his alcohol induced stupor, with ronan egging him on, gets giant raven wings tattooed on his upper back in jet black ink, all the way down the back of his arms to his elbows and the words “regis corvi” written vertically between the wings.

6

send these to ur special ones :-)

2

then & now

It's complicated
  • Me: I'm reading a really good AU fic
  • Husband: About Yuri?
  • Me: Well yes but it's an AU so only sort of about Yuri and one of them is a priest and it's full of lovely sexual tension.
  • Me: It's really hot
  • Husband: Ever watch Ballykissangel? That had sexual tension with a priest
  • Me: Yeah but that was straight so less hot
  • Husband: That feels like its sexist or something
  • Me: No if was with a Nun and a Non-nun...female...WOMAN that would be really hot too
  • Husband: So you only don't like sex between a man and a woman?
  • Me: Pretty much unless it involves you.
  • Husband: ...
  • Husband: How does that work if you like both men and women?
  • Me: I like guys in a gay way and women in a gay way.
  • Husband: Ah yes...
  • Me: Did you forget I'm genderfluid?
  • Husband: You know how you can put down 'it's complicated' for a relationship status? Is that an option for gender?
  • Me: IT SHOULD BE
You know it’s hot when...

You’re sketching and every piece of paper is sticking to you and can’t have the fan on to draw, or else the paper is gonna flutter up and bitch slap me.

Friendly Dragons and Where to Find Them - Prologue

Prologue to a story I’m currently writing based on the pictures I drew of Underfell Papyrus interacting with a dragon, and the idea of how dragons would work in the universe. 

Not my best work, but I just had a lot of time off from writing because of killer Writer’s Block, although, now I’m back to writing I should soon get back to my normal standard. 

*cough* Thanks to @undertalebrokenhome and @gothic-skeleton for the motivation the other day, really helped me a lot *cough*

Next: Here

Chapter under the read more button.

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