Rfa+minor trio reacting to mc being the worst cook in history but she looks so goddamn optimistic that they cant say her food is shit so its THE SHIT
✿ i may or may not have done some of these things over the years. which ones? guess.
- Didn’t realize someone could mess up more than him.
- It’s not that your food is misshapen. Yoosung’s food is misshapen. Yours positively looks diseased - like, what are those weird spots
- are those sesame seeds?
- why did you put sesame seeds in your eggs.
- Tries to be kind about correcting your mistakes, and is as endlessly positive as you are about improving.
- “It’s really good now! But I bet if we do this, it’ll be even better!”
- This man learns to lie like a saint.
- Since you’re the perfect person, you have to be the perfect cook, right?
- ZEN HAS NEVER BEEN MORE WRONG IN HIS LIFE, AND HE IS THE KING OF POOR DECISIONS.
- there is absolutely no way he’s going to spoil that delightful expression on his face though so he chugs beer to drown out the taste of Sin Itself.
- Treats eating your cooking as a harrowing experience he must go through where the reward is your smile.
- Always has beer with his meals, though. Always.
- She grew up in an abusive household where her presence was constantly dismissed, derided, and unwanted, and she still has never experienced anything as awkward as this moment.
- How do you not know?
- How do you not see?
- THE MEAT IS BURNED ON THE OUTSIDE AND RAW ON THE INSIDE, HOW DID YOU DO THIS.
- She tries to tell you but you’re just
- you’re just so happy and
- She starts walking cooking shows with you and prays it’ll do something to fix the travesty that is your food.
- Never, not once, has Jumin encountered bad cooking, so he doesn’t actually realize you’re doing anything wrong.
- He just think’s that putting a cup of black pepper instead of a tablespoon into food is “a thing commoners do”, and treats it like a curiosity.
- “How peculiar. Does the spiciness disguise the poor quality of the ingredients?”
- “I see… is the texture both crunchy and hard to compensate for the pasta’s blandness?”
- “Hmn… do the black parts give it extra flavor?”
- doesn’t understand why you get mad after that. oops.
- He puts his hands on his shoulders. He stares into your eyes. “MC,” he says gravely, like he’s about to deliver a terminal diagnosis. “I regret to inform you that you cannot cook.”
- your heart is shattered to pieces, but before you can emotionally collapse, Seven continues.
- “However, my love! Do not despair. This affords us with an excellent opportunity. Do you know what that is?”
- You shake your head mutely, and Seven’s grin lights up the room.
- “I can’t cook either. So together, we’re going to make the worst dish possible, and we’re going to force everyone else to eat it.”
- It becomes a game. The rest of the RFA thinks you and Seven are unaware of how bad your Ratatouille de Actual Live Rats with Diced Grape Tomato Sauce actually is, and while they’d tell Seven to buzz off, they can’t tell you. So faced with your unending cheer, they eat it.
- They consume it.
- You make a corporate heir, a famous actor, and a former secret agent consume your terrible cooking.
- you are monsters.
- Doesn’t grimace. Doesn’t cower. Doesn’t say a word. He just smiles and says “thank you” when you present him al dente pasta that probably hasn’t actually ever touched water.
- It’s not a lie. It’s genuine. This man doesn’t care that it’s garbage. You being happy and you trying to make him happy by spending time on something is enough for him.
- Even when you ruin a slow cooked pot-roast by putting jelly in it.
- Even then, he still smiles, eats it, and says he loves you.
- Like his twin, he’s also bad at cooking. Unlike his twin, he isn’t going to admit it, and he unknowingly joins you in being a terrifying force in the kitchen.
- Dishes become exponentially worse when touched by the two of you. Saeran wants to add sprinkles, you want to add frosting, and suddenly your lasagna looks like a birthday cake.
- “Let’s add candles! It can be dessert.”
- The person who bears the brunt of your abuse is Seven, who doesn’t have the heart to tell either of you how awful your food is.
- It culminates in you sending him to the hospital.
- You’re enrolled in classes after that, becoming a poor home ec teacher’s problem.
- Vanderwood wakes up at 3AM to find you sobbing over the stove, its glass top shattered and spices scattered everywhere on the floor.
- Apparently, you’d been possessed by the fae desire to make gingerbread cookies. Apparently, you were also too short to reach the cinnamon and cloves the recipe called for, and - in your flailing - the glass bottles all spilled out of the cabinet, breaking the stove, hitting you on the head, and scattering all over the floor.
- In a vacuum, this might be an incidence of clumsy-cute, but you do this constantly. In a previous life you must have angered the god of cooking because kitchen appliances are always trying to kill you.
- Vanderwood had to save you when you got your hair caught in the mixer. Vanderwood has had to bandage your wounds when you burned yourself on the stove. Vanderwood has had to help you pick up all the groceries from a collapsed fridge, and Vanderwood proceeds to baby-proof the kitchen and ban you from unsupervised cooking.
- It’s for your own good, they say. I don’t want to come in here and find your decapitated body.
- there is not a lot you can do in the face of their Motherly Tone.