it's not balanced

if you have been following me for awhile, you know i have been struggling my senior year of college to figure out what i want to do with my degrees (psychology and human resource management). i have finally figured out what i am doing with them, and i think it’s a perfect balance between the two.

i’m going on to get my phd and will be studying industrial/organizational psychology!! i’m super excited, because these psychologists study and improve workplace behaviors to make businesses more efficient. i would build tests, strategies, etc. to make sure businesses run smoothly and are doing things good for the workplace culture. creating tests would include personality tests!!! and i would really focus my studies on recruiting and hiring the right employees for the job. and once i feel like i need to do something new, i could become a full-time professor!!

my top three favorite things are: researching/studying people/theories, organization/efficiency, and teaching others. 

i have learned about this field a lot in my classes, but i was always hesitant to keep going to school since it will take longer. i have decided it is worth it. so i’m very pleased and will be applying for graduate programs soon. 

emani-writes  asked:

George froze, eyes wide and face lighting up to rival his hair, when Luna leaned in and pressed her lips to his with a sigh.

George froze, eyes wide and face lighting up to rival his hair, when Luna leaned in and  pressed her lips to his with a sigh.  “I’m not him,” he said.

She curved a hand around his cheek and looked into his eyes.  “I know,” she said.  “I’ve always known who you were.”

“I’m  not good,” he said desperately.  Too many years of mischief that skirted the bounds of a darkness he was just beginning to acknowledge made that clear.  He wondered, sometimes, if Fred had died because that was always the cost when you meddled with dark things.  Other times he thought that was crazy.   The universe didn’t balance its books that neatly.  Either way, he knew he wasn’t the shining beacon of light the woman in front of him was.  

All she said, however, was, “I know,” and then kissed him again.

from the send me a Harry Potter ship and a sentence and I’ll write the next five game.  (no more please)

Thoughts on Viktor and “Stay Close to Me”

This suddenly clicked on my mind and I needed to get it out.

The “Stay Close to Me” program was a cry for help.

I’ve seen posts showing the translations of the lyrics, and it’s basically about someone afraid of love and full of anger toward it, finally falling for someone and wanting this person to “stay close to them”.

What if Viktor seems so lonely (no significant other, no family mentioned, no friends shown ?) because he actually is. What if his relationships turned short because his partners only wanted to see the skater Viktor, the pretty playboy ? What if they never managed to do what Yuuri does, seeing him as human, wanting him to “be Viktor” ? And they didn’t want to see him as a whole human being, they didn’t want to see the part that aren’t that pretty. They didn’t want him to be awkward or messing up, or not knowing perfectly what to do in every situations. They didn’t want to see him not smiling or being happy and charming all the time. And it hurt Viktor, because he felt even less alone. Being with someone who don’t understand you and don’t really want you.

So he shut down and refused to let anyone close to him. Like Yuuri, he didn’t open up anymore. He kept skating, kept showing people what whey wanted to see, kept surprising them and surpassing himself.

But he felt he was reaching his limit. And mostly, the loneliness started to eat him alive. He was 27-years-old, and he felt like he always been lonely. Watched by thousands of people, but desperately lonely.

So he decided to give it a try. A last try. 

“Stay Close to Me” was a cry for help. It was his love story (maybe why he thought that Yuuri’s theme, “love”, was perfect ?), and the expression of his desire to find someone. He knew he couldn’t skate it perfectly because he didn’t have a significant other. yet. He skated it in the hope of someone seeing it and understanding. He skated it in the hope one day, he could skate it meaningfully (maybe in the duet version that’s put at the end of the official Yuri on Ice tracks list ?)

And it happened.

Yuuri understood. What was supposed to lie behind the program. What it meant. He skated it perfectly on the technical side, but also on the interpretation side. Yuuri had this emotional intelligence, this sensitivity, that made Viktor go “Him. He can understand. He might be the person I was looking for.” 

If you see it that way, it would only make sense Viktor would suddenly be ready to give up everything he knew (”I never thought I would leave this town”), to take a year off of the sport that meant his life, and to go toward the unknown so suddenly. Imagine how it would feel if you got so lonely for years, maybe for most of your life, when you gave up on love and being understood, gave a last try, and found someone, someone who understand. Imagine him seeing the glimpse of connection with Yuuri, hoping that it wouldn’t be a mistake, an other disappointment. Hoping that he’s not looking too much through it, that he’s right. Hoping that this time he really found someone.

Re-think of this scene of the episode 4, where he’s asking to Yuuri what he wants him to be for him. Imagine it being a test, and Viktor deep down thinking “please let me not be wrong. Please.”. Imagine his joy when Yuuri refuses all his offers to finally tell him he wants him to “be Viktor”. At this moment he knows he was right and that Yuuri can be the person who will understand him.

I might be wrong. But to me, “Stay Close to Me” was a cry for help. And Yuuri answered it.

🐱Un fanart qui traînait dans le tirroir.

More About Christmas - It’s About Balance Holiday One Shot

Surprise. ;) 

This isn’t Kansas City – obviously – but that’s coming sooner rather than later. I was struggling with whether or not I’d do Christmas-y things since not everybody celebrates but… I just… I have to. Apologies to those who don’t partake, for whatever reasons. I wish you a joyous holiday, and a stress free season. 

It’s for our Teenage Dirtbag, but it can be read as a standalone without a problem.

Oh, yeah. Smut. x

Gemma and Anne are trimming the tree in front of you. It’s a beautiful thing – huge, full, and dripping in ornaments and lights that are casting a soft glow around the darkening room. They’re mumbling to each other as they coordinate where to place what – there’s two Baby’s First Christmas ornaments, a wobbly looking snowman that had been handmade for some Christmas past, and shiny baubles that reflect your worried frown even from your spot on the couch.

“Love, would you like to help?” Anne asks you warmly as she searches for the perfect branch to place her next ornament. She’s got a thick Christmas jumper on that is the opposite of ugly and tasteful snowmen adorn her socks.

“Thank you,” you manage a smile. “That’s alright. I wouldn’t want to interfere – seems like you two have a plan.”

“Not really,” Gemma says as she reaches on her toes. “Whoops!” she exclaims under her breath when she nearly teeters a bit too far to hang her bauble on a prized branch towards the top. “We’re actually better at it when Harry’s here. He’s all chaos for the first part of it until he settles down, so we’re able to organize when we’ve got to beat him back.”

You laugh, but it’s fleeting, his name reminding you of his present absence. You chance a glance down at your screen, but somehow you feel more deflated than before when you find nothing new from him.

“You might as well help, you know,” Gemma says as she picks up another ornament before replacing it in favor of a new one. “Wallowing isn’t going to bring him here faster.”

“Sweetheart,” Anne warns Gemma gently. “We’re all worried and we want him to be here.”

Gemma is silent and you feel hot and uncomfortable. Both she and Anne have been nothing but kind to you since you’d shown up without Harry, a lump in your throat when you told them that he’d gotten delayed in Los Angeles because of the weather in New York and his flight had been pushed out a day. London, too, has been earning a snowfall that they’d previously assumed he’d miss, and the roads to Holmes Chapel had been covered in a thin coating of fluffy flakes on your drive over. So far, you’d heard of no cancellations to Heathrow, but….

“What one can I have?” you ask as you set your phone down and pull your feet from under you to stand. Anne hands you a star ornament and you stand as tall as you can and place it on the highest branch you can reach.

“Funny,” Gemma remarks as she pushes an icicle so it twirls back and forth. “That’s where he puts it, too.”

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2

I’m aware there’s flaws in my theory…but I think I’m on to something