Crystal meth is my companion but there are some rules to learn
They have always fucking told you, if its shard You gotta earn
Thinking this shits easy, my friend thats not the truth
A ball is fine and dandy but an ounce will shine through
Until you come to realize that bowl was way to fat
You smoked up all your money, thats no surprise to you
You swear that after this, you will go to sleep
And then its four days later and you cannot slow the speed
Your familys mighty worried, you seemed so very pissed
and you can never tell them,Its just a dose you missed
Now its 6 months later and nothings been the same
Youve learned so much about this, this twisted little game
All you’re friends have left you, you know whos to blame
You always forget to message, you dont sound the same.
The meth fucking changed you, in ways you cant believe
You used to be so quiet, but now youve got the speed
You finally opened up, you’ve never felt so free
But now you’re getting lonley, with no one by your side
Your family wont come see you, it hurts them so much
You lost a bunch of weight and started looking rough
Your skin is has been ruined, by your own once gental touch
You think that in the past, you hurt so fucking much but now.whem youre sober, you cant tell which ways up
You think about rehab and maybe getting clean
But then you come to realize, shes never ever leaving
Tina will more than likely, always fucking be
Forever right beside you, shes bad company
Prompt AU: I asked you
to babysit one time and now my child keeps asking when you will spend time with
them again – Single Parent AU
AN: Okay…so this one
is my longest and yet I feel like not a lot happened? Like I feel like I could
go further on this, maybe do a separate one where they have the date night?
Would anybody be interested in that?
Just take a deep
breath, close your eyes, and when you open them again you will be calm.
The mantra that you had been using since the birth of your
son was truly starting to lose its luster. After the third time repeating this,
the splitting pain in your temple still going strong, you realized that today
just wasn’t going to be a calm day at all. You knew from the moment you went to
wake up your five-year-old son that the morning definitely wasn’t going to be
Chulsoon had never been an easy child to wake up, but this
morning it appeared that he was going to make that task extra hard. “Chulsoon,
wake up sweetheart, you know that you have school today,” you said as you
started walking around his room, kicking stray toys out of the way as you
started going through his closet to pick out what he could wear to school that
day. All you got in return was a drawn out whine as your little lump of a son
turned over in bed, completely ignoring your request to him. “Chulsoon,” you
scolded as you laid out the clothes.
“I expect you awake, dressed, and down at the kitchen table
to eat breakfast in the next five minutes,” you said, trying to be as stern as
possible. When your son emerged ten minutes later, his shirt backwards, and
tears streaming down his face “I don’t’
want to go to school today,” he’ had whined, you knew that today was also
going to be a late day. The poor child whines and dribbled all through
breakfast, barely able to even eat more than five spoonful’s of cereal before
you’d had to scoop him up and get his shoes on so you could drive him.
“C’mon sweetheart, help mommy out a little bit, I need to go
to work today as well,” you say as your son flops himself on the floor after
his shoes had been tied. Your neatly fixed hair was already starting to look
disheveled as you tapped your foot, purse in one hand, Chulsoon’s backpack in
the other. “Chulsoon now,” you scolded again, watching as he drug himself a few
feet and then defeated managed to get on his two feet and get into the car.
It amazed you though that after the first five minutes of
the drive he seemed to be in much higher spirits. “Mommy,” you heard him call
from the backseat, his face directed outside though as he watched all of the
buildings pass by. “Yes baby?” you asked, as you concentrated on the traffic
ahead of you. “When is Jackson going to come back over and see me?” the
question no longer surprised you. About three weeks ago you had asked a
coworker of yours to watch him. Your usual babysitter had bailed on you and you
had an extremely important work meeting that you needed to attend. Usually you
would have been extremely picky with who was with your son, but you knew the
coworker pretty well and trusted him. Plus, he’d met Chulsoon before in the
past and they’d hit it off back then as well. Only now after he’d spent an
entire evening with your son, he couldn’t’ seem to stop talking about him.
“Chulsoon you know that Jackson is very busy with his own work as well.”
Looking into the rearview mirror, you could have sworn that
you saw a few tears gathering up in your little boy’s eyes again, your own
heart clenching a little. “But, I’ll make sure I talk to him today. Maybe he
can come by this weekend,” and within an instant you had your smiling boy back.
Raising Chulsoon as a single mother had been one of the most
trying times of your entire life. His father had passed away when you were five
months pregnant, leaving you alone in Korea, pregnant, and a soon to be single
mother that would be raising her child alone. Thankfully Chulsoon’s father’s family
had been accepting of the pregnancy, and even after the death of their son,
Chulsoon’s grandparents on his father’s side had helped tremendously. They
supported you in the first few months after his birth, giving you time not only
to grieve for your lost love, but to learn how to raise and take care of your
new one. Once you were on your two feet they also helped you greatly financially,
and you knew that you would always have a debt to pay to them for what they had
down. For the time being they were just happy to be part of their grandson’s
life, being able to see their son live on in him. And that was exactly what it
was like having Chulsoon, who looked so strikingly similar to his father. After
five years though, you had come to peace with knowing that your lost love was
gone, and the idea of moving on and meeting someone who could love you and
Chulsoon was always in the back of your mind.
When you had first met Jackson about a year ago in the
office, you had to admit that he was strikingly handsome. While you worked the
front desk and made sure that everything was put away and filed nicely for the
company you worked for, Jackson was actually one of the music engineers that
worked with various artists at the music company. Despite what many thought,
your paths ran across one another quite often. You relayed any messages that he
got, you delivered his mail and packages, and every day he appeared for work,
he would stop by your desk and makes sure to sit and talk for a while; it was
But things had never quite left that routine, and for a
while it felt like maybe nothing else was there between the two of you. Maybe
he wasn’t into somebody who had a young child; or maybe he just wasn’t into
you. The few other women that worked there disagreed heavily, saying he was
secretly shy with that stuff and he needed time. But how much time were you
willing to keep giving away?
Pulling up to the school, you parked and went around to
Chulsoon’s side, unbuckling him from his car-seat and helping him out onto the
sidewalk. “Goodbye sweetheart,” you say as you bend down and give him a kiss
goodbye. “Remember to talk to Jackson!” your son instructs you as he turns and
runs towards his classmates, you shaking your head slightly as you climb back
into the car.
Another fifteen minutes and you were sitting in your
receptionist chair, eyes on the front door as you greeted other employees and
checked people in. Your head was down when he walked in but as soon as you
heard his greeting, you knew who it was. “Miss [Y/N], you look lovely as
always,” Jackson said, a bright smile on his face that instantly spread over to
you, even as you ran your hand self-consciously through your messy hair. “Quit
flattering yourself Jackson,” you say, a chuckle leaving your lips as you watch
the mock hurt spread across his face, a hand going to his heart. “You turning
away my genuine compliments kills me,”
a laugh escaping his own lips as he leans casually on the counter in front of your
“Any exciting plans this weekend?” you heard him ask, and
while this question had been something that used to get your heart thumping,
you couldn’t help but just give him a sad smile. The first time he’d ever posed
that question you had been sure that he was going to ask you to do something.
Of course that hadn’t happened, and now there you were however many months
later, and he’d asked you that every single Friday leading up until that point.
“Well…I did promise I’d do something for Chulsoon,” you say, leaning your chin
on your hands as you look up at Jackson. His face immediately brightened at the
mention of your son, your heart doing a quick skip at that as you nervously
brushed your hair behind your ear. “He wanted me to ask you what you were doing
Jackson couldn’t help the bit of shock that went across his
face as he looked at you. “What I’m doing?” he questioned, you nodding your
head back at him. “He’s been talking about you ever since you watched him that
one night and he really was hoping to see you again. I thought maybe if you
weren’t busy you could come over Saturday and maybe have dinner with us?” you
ask, biting your lip as you wait for his answer.
Of course you hoped more than anything that Jackson would
say yes, because how on earth would you be able to calmly let Chulsoon know if
he decided to decline you. Deep down though you were hoping that Jackson would
say yes for your own sake as well. You couldn’t help but always feel like time
was ticking for you. You weren’t as young as you used to be, and things were
only going to get a lot crazier as Chulsoon got older and started joining more
activities. After being a single mother for five years, you wanted nothing more
than to just feel the intimacy of another human being. As badly as you wanted that
person to be Jackson, you knew that you couldn’t keep simply hoping. Either one
of you needed to act on this or you needed to move on.
Watching as Jackson leaned further onto the counter and
smiled, you nearly let out a sigh of relief at his words. “I’d love to! Maybe I
could come a little earlier and play with him, and then maybe stay a little
later than dinner after he’s gone to bed and possibly…I don’t know spend some
time with you,” his arm was rubbing the back of his neck as he said the last
part, a small chuckle leaving his lips. Your own lips were pulling up into a
large smile, your cheeks gaining just the slightest of color as you nodded your
head in agreement.
“I think that would be lovely.”
“Perfect! Then I’ll be over at five on Saturday.” Jackson
said as he slowly pushed himself away from the counter, slowly walking away
while still facing you. “I can’t wait for it [Y/N].”
“I can’t either.” You reply, only allowing yourself the
break into giggles when he was a safe distance away.
Childermass basically asking Norrell if he has friends and Norrell being like, “you know very well that I do not”
“Childermass inquired drily if Mr Norrell wished him to seek out architecture expressive of the proposition that magic was as respectable as the Church?
Mr Norrell (who knew there were such things as jokes in the world or people would not write about them in books, but who had never actually been introduced to a joke or shaken its hand) considered a while before replying at last that no, he did not think they could quite claim that.”
Mr Norrell read for another a minute or two before remarking (apparently to his book), “You are still here.”
“I am,” said Childermass.
“Well then,” said Mr Norrell, “what is it? What is the matter?”
The description of parties is spot-on, I won’t type it all out but spot-on
“In familiar surroundings our manners are cheerful and easy, but only transport us to places where we know no one and no one knows us, and Lord! how uncomfortable we become!” THIS IS SERIOUSLY LEGIT
Lascelles is described as handsome *thumbs up*
Drawlight says Childermass has a face like a “twisted hedge-root” and that he has “the wild, romantic looks” (how is a twisted hedge-root romantic??)
N/A: I know it took me a while to write this and its not as big as the other chapters. Keep in mind I am in senior year of college, working and doing a research internship at the same time, so life is not easy right now. I love this phanfic and I would never abandon it, don’t worry! Btw, if you guys are bothered with all the grammar and spell mistakes I’ve been making, please let me know where they are and I’ll fix them. I don’t have much time to write this, I write on my phone and English is not my first language, so it is kinda hard for me. Thank you all <3
Thank you for all the love I’ve been receiving for this phanfic, honestly, it makes my day every time someone sends me an ask, or just search for it trough the Phanfiction Catalogue and ask them about it. I feel loved, and its an amazing feeling.
For those of you that might be a bit confused, this fic is happening around the end of January/2016. Before the tour dates release. Have fun!
Disclaimer: Nor Dan or Phil belongs to me, and while I wish I had a Lizzie in real life, I do not have one either.
i keep thinking about how dave and karkat as kids were both so fucking weird about expressing or receiving expressions of affection. like they both grew up in environments of extreme traumatic emotional isolation and dave responded to it by always striving to be really reserved and in-communicative abt feelings in a way that is not and has never been his nature, and karkat just became incredibly neurotic and insecure about any open or forthright expression of affection because he was always so terrified of being shot down and rejected or screwing things up
and like in the flash its killing me how like. all the little expressions of affection and intimacy between them are so easy? they’re like sharing headphones and holding hands and snuggling on the couch. like they’ve cultivated a dynamic where they can be openly sweet with each other and i’m just thinking about like. what a process it must have been for dave to feel like that was an ok safe thing for him to do. and for karkat to feel like it wasn’t something he had to freak out about every time and he wasn’t going to ruin it or fuck it up and it wasn’t going to Go Away At Any Second. like. they must feel really secure with each other..
i’m just like. holy shit i’m so happy about this as a development in both their characters like jfc its so gratifying to see them like being in a better place and being good for each other and being happy. fucking help me
accept instead of trying to forget. your past whether good or bad, was and is yours, accept it, don’t try to act like a hard guy trying to forget it, trust me forgetting has never been easy no matter how much they say, and why forget, it was part of your life, accept it, with open heart and you would see the true meaning behind those unfortunate moments and blessed happenings, they teach you a lot, if you want to learn, accept it, make it yours and wear them with pride and share it with the world with head held high instead of hiding them, its easier to accept truth, instead of proving to world its not false.
Warnings: fluff, smut, oral, (female&male receiving), sub!reader, Dom!dean, unprotected sex
Being a hunter was never easy, sure it had its perks but there were also a lot of downfalls. Saving people was surely the best feeling you had ever felt, but it couldn’t compare to the pain you felt when you couldn’t save someone. You were a very strong hunter, you knew a lot of tactics but you never fought at your best when you were around other hunters. You would usually hunt alone but for the past few weeks you’d been working with the Winchesters on every case either you or they could find. You practically lived in the bunker with them, you had your own room, you slept there everyday.
You found a case, you were stalking it out for a few days before you decided to approach the vamps nest.
“You guys ready?” You asked sitting in the back of the impala looking at the two brothers in the front seat.
“Let’s go kill some sons of bitches” Dean replied grabbing his sword ready to cut their heads off.
You all got out of the impala and walked slowly towards the warehouse. You all went your separate ways and looked around. Once again you had to fight a little less stronger than you usually would if you were alone. You hated seeming like a show off to other hunters, especially the Winchesters. You slowly stepped forward looking around and watching your surroundings. A vamp saw you and charged right towards you. Before he could bash into you, you moved out the way and put your knife right where he was running towards. He ran coward into your knife and his head cut clean off.
You walked around a wall and saw the cluster of vamps, Sam and Dean already in the middle fighting them off. There must have been about 7 more by the time you got there. Sam and Dean seemed to have this, before you knew it there was only 2 left. Dean fighting one and Sam the other. You stepped forward as Dean handled the one he had but Sam was knocked down. You wouldn’t stand there and watch this vamp hurt Sam, he was like a brother to you, you wouldn’t let anyone hurt him. You ran towards the vamp but this vamp was fast.
He put his hand out and put it around your neck, he was about to lift you from the ground holding your neck with one hand. Before he could you kicked his stomach and he fell back and his hand came away from your neck. This vamp was strong and not going down without a fight, you couldn’t just cut his head off you had to beat him down first. You punched him right in the corner of his jaw with your right hand, then you punched his nose with your left hand. He stood up and charged towards you. You ducked and he fell forward. You pressed one foot into his back and lifted both of his arms back and twisted them, breaking his arms. You hadn’t noticed but Sam and Dean were just standing there watching you with shock. You now turned the vamp onto his front and he laid there and looked up at you.
“Stupid fucking hunters” he mumbled under the blood pouring from his mouth.
“You don’t hurt my friends you stupid son of a bitch” you said through gritted teeth before you cut the bastards head off.
You stood up straight now catching your breathe. You turned around to the Winchesters to see them with jaws dropped to the floor.
“How… Wha.. Wha… How did yo-” Sam was lost for words.
“Ok so maybe when I hunt with other hunters I hold back sometimes” you stated.
“So that was just you? Being you?” Sam asked with a smile.
“Yes” you replied with a breathy laugh.
“Well that was fricking awesome, you’re better than Sam” Dean said. Sam gave Dean the bitch face.
“I’m better than you too sugar” you joked. Dean now had bitch face and Sam laughed. You laughed to yourself and walked out of the warehouse and back to the impala.
*the next day*
You woke up in your room the next morning feeling good about yourself for yesterday. You finally opened up as the hunter you are and you felt good about it. You walked into the library where the two boys were sitting. You were wearing a big baggy shirt that you stole from Dean, you were sure he didn’t mind. Lace panties underneath but no one could see them because the shirt was so big on you. You sat on the chair opposite Sam and next to Dean. Sam was on his laptop probably looking for a case and Dean was sitting with a beer in his hand as always.
“Isn’t it a little early to be drinking?” You asked Dean.
“It’s 12:30” he stated defensively.
“My point exactly” you giggled. “I want one” you said reaching out towards the pack he had on the table.
“That’s my girl” he said reaching forward to grab you one. ‘My girl’. You liked the sound of that. He never called you that before, that is because you were just friends… Nothing more. You opened the beer and now had your focus on Sam.
“Find a case?” You asked.
“Huh?” Sam asked like you distracted him. Dean laughed to himself. You looked between them both in a confused way.
“What?” You asked.
“Sam’s not looking for a case he’s talking to ‘Erica’.”
“Ooo who’s Erica?” You winked at Sam.
“Oh uh, just this uh, just this girl I uh, I thought I would try a dating website and we’ve been talking for a while, you know it’s nothing, really!”
“Awww, Sammy’s in love” you tapped Deans arm. “That’s so adorable”. Dean just laughed at Sam.
“No I’m not.. It’s just-”
“Sam it’s ok, it’s cute. I love the idea of being in love it’s beautiful” you stated as you both now looking at each other. “I’m happy that you’re happy” you smiled. Sam smiled and looked back down at his laptop to talk to Erica.
“What about you Dean?” You asked now with your attention on him. He looked up awkwardly from him beer.
“You ever been in love?” You asked.
“Well um. I don’t know I guess so”
“Who was the lucky lady?” You asked.
“Don’t think I could give you a name, but she’s the most beautiful person I have ever met. And I don’t just mean to look at I mean everything she does and says. The way her hair looks when she wakes up, and the way she smiles, and how a room lights up whenever she walks in. And she is so moody, she complains a lot about small things but I find it so cute. I love the way she talks to me and how protective she is, and the way she always has time for me. She’s the most beautiful person I know” he said while swirling his finger around the top of his beer bottle and looking at the table while thinking about the girl he ‘was’ in love with.
“Well whoever she is, sounds like you still are in love with her”
There was a slight pause and everyone was silent. He looked up at you while Sam stared at his brother.
“Yeah I guess you’re right” he said with a sudden realisation. There was a small awkward silence before you decided to get back up and walk back to your room. You weren’t quite sure what just happened.
*a few hours later*
You heard a soft knock on your door.
“Hey it’s me” Dean said.
“Come in” you replied.
He slowly opened the door and walked in, he closed the door behind him. He walked towards you and sat on the edge of your bed. His hand was on your thigh as he was about to talk, his mouth opened but no words seemed to come out.
“What was earlier all about?” You asked, addressing what you were both thinking.
“I think we both know” he said. You were still confused. What did you know about this girl that he’s in love with? That he thinks she’s beautiful and loves everything she does? That’s all.
“I uh- I don’t know what you mean”
“Seriously?” He asked.
You were still clueless. You just sat there and stared into his eyes ting to figure out what he meant.
“You know another thing I love about her? I love how clueless she is that I’m in love with her”
You paused for a second. Ok? Why was he telling you this? How is this gonna help him tell this girl that he loves her?
“Ok so go and tell her” you said. He just looked down and laughed at how clueless you are.
“Y/N, I just told her” he said.
“What did you text her or something? Oh Dean you should never do it over text you idiot you should tell them in person” you playfully punched his shoulder.
“I told her in person, y/n do I have to spell it out to you? I was talking about you!” He said now with his other hand cupping your cheek.
You moved your hand up and removed his hand from your cheek. You laughed at him.
“What’s so funny?”
“Me? Seriously? You’re kidding right. I mean yes you’re cute and Dean I love you so much, you’re my favourite person in the world but why me?”
“Did it not even cross your mind?”
“No, not at all, why would someone like you be in love with a piece of crap like me?”
“That’s why” he said. “You don’t think you deserve to be loved, you don’t expect things from life. You know what life is like you know what to expect. And i know you put up this wall to keep people out. You try to stop people from seeing who you truly are because you’re afraid of getting hurt and I know because I pay attention. I know you”
“Wow I uh- I didn’t expect this” you said with a small smile.
“I don’t want you to be freaked out by this”
“I love you too” you said before he could carry on to tell you how you didn’t have to be with him if you didn’t want to.
He didn’t reply, he just stared into your eyes and smiled.
“And you know what I want to do right now?” You said grabbing the hand that he had on your thigh and moving it up higher.
“Sam’s on a supply run, he might be out for a while” he whispered in your ear.
“Then what are you waiting for?” You said before leaning in and kissing him. The kiss was deep and passionate. Both your tongues dancing with each other and exploring each other’s mouths.
His hand found your panties and slowly rubbed on the outside of the fabric. You broke from the kiss and closed your eyes. You let out a small breath as he continued to rub his hand on your panties and stare up at you with lust.
You laid on your back and lifted your shirt off, leaving you breasts naked. Dean took his jeans and shirt off, leaving him in just his pants. Both of you left in just your pants.
He hovered above you and slowly kissed down your stomach and coming right to your pussy. He kissed the insides of your thighs building up and getting closer to your core. You moaned a little when he kissed your pussy through your panties.
“Play with your boobs baby” he instructed while taking your lace panties off and throwing them to the floor. You did just as he said, and he lightly pressed his tongue in your clit, teasing you. He then slowly started adding more pressure and speeding up, you move your hands away from your breasts and tugged on his hair and he continued to lick you out.
“Uhh Dean” you moaned.
“Don’t come yet baby, I wanna fuck you when you come”. He slowly stopped what he was doing and stood up to take his pants off, he stood at the side of the bed while you sat on the edge and stared at his cock.
“It’s so big” you stated as you grabbed it and slowly started pumping it in your hand. You then slowly licked the underneath causing him to moan. You licked your tongue around the end of his cock and then started pushing your mouth all around it earning s lot of moans from Dean.
You had to stop yourself because he almost came, but you both weren’t ready for that yet.
“Lay back on the bed baby” he pushed your hair out of your face and you did as he told you.
He laid on top of you and slowly rubbed his dick against your clit causing you to buck your hips.
“Someone’s eager” he said staring into your eyes with lust.
“I just wanna feel you inside me” you wrapped your arms around his neck and closed your eyes, focusing in the pressure in your clit.
“My princess gets what she wants” he smiled before thrusting his cock into you.
He kept slowly thrusting into you then speeding up and thrusting harder. “You come when I tell you to ok?” He said.
You were already close, but you had to hold off until he told you to come. “Uh, I’m so close”
“I know baby but don’t come yet ok”
He continued what he was doing, you on your back and him on top of you. Still thrusting harshly into you while he kissed you passionately.
“I’m so close Dean”
“Come for me baby” he said.
And with that you finally came, it was a feeling you couldn’t explain. It was like an explosion of pleasure over taking your body. You moaned his name and forgot your own. You screamed and your body shook under his. He followed shortly, coming inside of you. You laid on his back next to you on your bed.
He wrapped his arm around you and kissed your forehead.
“That felt different” he said
“Good or bad?” You asked.
“Good, really really, good”
“I felt different too, it didn’t feel like just sex”
“That’s because it wasn’t” you now looked at him into his green eyes which had changed from lust to love.
Since it’s Independence Day here in the United States I’ve been taking it easy and queuing up some content. It occurred to me that my circle of friends and I have very strange conversations about speculative biology and I think some of you may find them amusing when presented completely out of context:
- “I think I’ll do something with annelids. Worms are good for creative work.”
- “Reptiles never change no matter what you throw at them. Nature just made them too god damn perfect.”
- “I read about this bird in New Guinea that absorbs neurotoxin from its food sources and stores them in its feathers to dissuade predators from eating them. So I was thinking it would be cool to do the same thing with chickens and capsaicin. Imagine it: a world where hot wings require no sauce. It’s a revolutionary idea.”
- “So then I said ‘baby are you DNA helicase because I’d love to unzip your genes.’ She didn’t get it.”
- “So basically these organisms would be different from the parasitic reproducers in that they exchange genetic information directly between members of the same species through vertical gene transfer and… And I’ve accidentally recreated sex. Damn it.”
gansey: you feel empty and no matter how polished you try to seem it doesn’t make you any more full, you feel like everyone isnt appreciating you enough and maybe taking advantage of you but you deserve it bc your life has been the easiest and maybe you deserve to suffer, you’re drowning yourself in anything that doesn’t involve your true feelings bc you cant confront them not now maybe never, you always know what everyone needs and always try to be that person but its getting old and its starting to hurt, you believe in the impossible and dream of the unimaginable and its easy to lose yourself in your own thoughts and forget about your life and its hard to go to sleep but its easy to be someone different and if you can just make someone else’s life a little easier than it settles the guilt you have about your own privilege, and its easier to be around other people pretending to be someone you’re not than being alone with a reflection you don’t like all that much
adam: stress is more than a six letter word its a constant way of life and armor is nothing more than a second skin, you have a lot going on constantly and no amount of brains will keep your thoughts from reminding you that you are alone, in a groups of friends laughing you feel misplaced and you know they care but it doesn’t bring them any closer but that’s how life is, getting close to someone will only ever hurt, there needs to be space between you and everyone else and maybe its not intentional but its still present, and sometimes its hard to remember that life is real when you’re not hurting and sometimes you just want to constantly run away from everything and you hate how no one appreciates what they have when they have so much more than you, and its not fair that you drew the short stick on life but it doesn’t fucking matter bc you’ll work yourself to the bone to get something better in life and you know family doesn’t mean a shit if they hurt you and pride is your worst enemy but being humble would be worst bc you worked so hard for everything you have and you’ll be damned to give even an ounce of credit away, and you feel bitter when someone has so much more than you and just throws it away, it feels like all the people around you have more opportunities than you but they never try hard enough or work hard enough and they only ever take advantage of what they have whether its money or family, and you know you shouldn’t think this way but its hard when you’re constantly being reminded of what you lack
noah: you feel easily forgotten, it hurts to be overlooked but if you smile extra hard you think they’ll remember you next time and if they don’t than at least the present was fun while it lasted, and that’s what matters, bc in the end everything stays the same even if the people surrounding you change, so you think that if you smile and laugh and keep everyone happy then you’ll be happy and that’s all you ever wanted and its not fair that people move on so quickly, you just want someone to take a break and focus on you but you feel like that’s too much to ask for, and everything feels temporary except you never seem to be moving forward, you hate that everyone is improving themselves and growing up and that you haven’t seem to change, and you feel as if you’ll be left behind if you don’t do something to make up for what you’re lacking and its scary to face the thought that you might be alone forever, and its easy to know what others are thinking but your own feelings are a mystery
ronan: the world only ever takes from you and it sucks ass but you’re stronger for everything you’ve gone through and fuck anyone who says you aren’t, and you act tough and hard but when it comes down to it you’re still just a little kid so when you see something innocent you have to protect it, you have a soft spot for animals or anyone who’s not touched by cruelty and you have this intense desire to protect bc no one ever shielded you from the world so you’ll become someone else’s shield to keep them from crying, and sleep is filled with nightmare and nights are met with restlessness and nothing really matters in life all that much except the people around you, you care fiercely and a part of you is worried that you’ll fail to protect everyone so you devote your time to teasing others and creating a persona that doesn’t care but in truth even the single idea of losing someone from your life is unthinkable, so you get reckless bc if you get hurt that means everyone else is safe
blue: you feel painfully average compared to everyone else, and isolated from all the other great and talented people in your life, you find it hard to keep up with them sometimes but that doesn’t ever stop you and you’re afraid of trying too hard for what you want bc its not realistic since you’ll never be beyond what you are now, and you want to get away to where no one knows who you are so you can pretend even for just a little while that you’re more than what you are, you’re terrified that this is all you’ll ever be bc you want to be great you want to be talented you want to be special, you spend hours of your time trying to make yourself seem interesting enough to deserve the people in your life but you feel like it doesn’t change anything and you dream of adventures and you know one day that everything will be different but its not soon enough and sometimes you worry you’ll always be in the background of everyone else’s life
While he was still hesitant to be there, he stayed steady in his concern for her. It was easy for him to blame himself for what had happened and seeing her in this state wrecked him. His job was supposed to allow him to save people, but he’d been too late to rescue her.
What good was his job if people like Bridget slipped through the cracks so easily? If he couldn’t protect the people he cared about.
And he did care about her. Not just because she was Danny’s sister, but because in the time he’d known her she had proven to be both stubborn and resilient and he respected that. She was a spitfire and he found himself able to relax around her, even during this investigation.
Until now. Until sitting there staring at her wondering where it had gone wrong, wondering what he missed in order to let this happen. Until he sat there and blamed himself for the outcome, despite the fact that it could have been much worse. He was lucky she’d only been hurt, not killed.
A lot of that had been due to who she was as a person. To her instinct to fight back. She had done well for herself; he was very proud. The small smile he felt tug at his lips was proof enough of that, proof enough that she had done good. Everything could have ended a lot worse without her or her cooperation and he’d been very lucky to have her, even if she had been adverse to the idea of helping him in the beginning. She really pulled through and that was how he knew she was going to piece herself back together, to be okay.
“If that’s what you want,” he spoke softly, careful not to sound upset or overly worried. She didn’t need his protection; she’d proven that. More than likely she didn’t even want it, but he was the one who had to call Danny and explain how his sister had not only been part of an active investigation, but had been injured by Callen’s unwillingness to budge.
“My car might be more comfortable than a taxi, though.” And that was all he wanted: to come across as apologetic and caring enough to let her give him a ride. Make this up in small favors. And yet that wasn’t where his lips stopped moving. “And you can stay at my place tonight, if you’d rather be somewhere quiet. No kids, no dogs, no noisy neighbors.”
To an extent, he wasn’t sure why he even bothered to offer. It wasn’t his place. “And I don’t really sleep, so if you ended up needing anything you wouldn’t have to worry about bothering me.” His pulse quickened just enough to let him know that he probably crossed a line. That there were boundaries and he was trying too hard.
Yet his smile remained, a softness in his eyes. He was trying. He had to; she earned that much and more.
When their leader Namjoon gave him the responsibility of looking after the newest addition of their coven, Jimin had been nervous because he knew it was no easy task. Still, he never imagined things would end up as they did.
Confession: I have such a hard time when it comes to talking to people. I don’t know how to make conversation and whenever I’m put in a situation where I have to talk to someone new my brain goes into overdrive trying to find something to say. I can never just relax and let it come naturally. I really want to put myself out there and talk to people. I’m really envious of my best friend because of how easy it is for her to talk to people and make a lot of friends. I’ve always been pretty introverted and shy around strangers but its like as I got older it got worse. I’ve lost a lot of friends over the years because of how closed off I am. I never tried to engage in conversations with them and when they tried talking to me I’d unintentionally push them away.
There have been opportunities where I can talk to people and am not as on edge, but I instead stay on my phone in fear that I’ll come off as lame to them once they start talking to me. It really doesn’t help the fact that next year I’m going to a new school. At least at my current school I know some people who I feel comfortable with, but at my new school next year I literally know nobody there. I don’t know how I’ll be able to manage
For all it’s tiny size the Dipsa is one of the most dangerous magical serpents in existence. Its tiny size not only makes it easy to hide, but the high toxicity of its venom, and the painlessness of its bite means that it is almost impossible to notice someone has been bitten and to get them the antivenom in time. Despite this Dipsa are among the most pleasant and calm magical serpents to exist and, generally, are considered to make excellent pets, though they must be milked daily of their venom, lest the Ministry confiscate the creature.
Dipsa venom has been used in many purgative potions before, as it is highly effective, although Dipsa venom is never sold on the open market, but rather through the relevant magical Ministry, or equivalent institution, with a portion of the profit going to the relevant institution (usually funnelled directly into the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, or equivalent), and a portion of profit going to the snakes owner. The venom is only permitted to be bought by medical institutions, and there are numerous magical and non-magical barriers in place to ensure only magical hospitals, clinics and health centres can purchase the dangerous venom.
You don’t amaze me because I love you.
I love you because you amaze me.
Happiness was just a myth until we met.
Ever since then my world has been complete.
Never could find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
But when I looked into your eyes I found the most beautiful riches of them all.
Didn’t believe in love at first.
But now all I feel is the constant love that you give me.
The butterflies in my stomach.
The electricity in my skin when we touch.
The fireworks in my chest when we kiss.
The love in my heart when you say my name.
Its a beautiful thing really.
How I would go to the ends of the earth for you my love.
It is not by any means easy.
The situation we’ve been put into.
But I promise that I’m never leaving.
You loved me when I couldn’t love myself.
That’s the greatest thing I have ever stumbled upon.
So when you’re feeling down.
Know that my words are straight out of love and care.
I’m a mess dear.
This I know.
But for you princess.
I’d clean up and put it aside to see that smile.
Us against the world is too cliche.
Us until we disperse is a much better representation.
Why yes I might be.
And by golly if this is love I’m the luckiest girl on the planet.
Because I get to love God’s most precious angel.
I don’t know if that was about me but is this reassuring?
“I’ve never been good with words. Talking about my problems gives me anxiety and sometimes I stutter so bad I forget my train of thought. Love has always come easy to me and I’m good at getting what I want.
The first girl I ever loved broke my heart into a million pieces. I picked some of them up but I’m afraid there’s always going to be a few that I miss.
Math has always come naturally to me. Sometimes I think I was meant to speak in numbers rather than words. There are only so many letter combinations in the English language. Maybe if I could communicate using the infinite combinations of numbers I could finally explain my love for her. In a room filled with beautiful people she’d be the only one with any ounce of my attention.
My second heartbreak was toxic. I wore myself down attempting to bring her back up. Yet no matter how much I let my soul die her heart was still filled with poison.
I’ve always had a special fascination with space. I think it’s because I can’t bring myself to believe that this planet we call "home” is the best we’ll ever have. Maybe I have too much faith in the human race but I naturally believe the sky is not the limit. In fact, limits themselves are self-imposed and therefore illusions.
One day I hope to find a love as infinite as the universe itself so that maybe I can be brought back down to earth.“
It’s been bothering me for a while now about all the hate on tags…
I’ve been going through my ship tags and I’ve noticed there’s a lot of hate and I always see people saying “block them” but I’ve never seen anyone telling you how or how to on a apple decide… (There probably is but shhh )
Literally its this easy if your just scrolling down your tag and see someone spamming or being horrible just click on the three dots and flag as inappropriate. boom they can’t see your posts and you won’t see theirs and no, they won’t know you’ve blocked them.
Like a ship tag is supposed to be a place that makes you happy and if there is people fucking that up for you then just get rid of them.
I know it’s a hassle but fighting with them and arguing doesn’t work…