it's late and i'm being weird

Late night destressing, plus a little bit of vent art.

Jumin is such a complex character. His personality is so much deeper than what it first seems, and he’s such an interesting person to doodle whenever I feel lost, confused, or basically unsure of myself. I can really relate to how he bottles everything up (and that’s bad yo, I know I’m a hypocrite for saying this, but please don’t bottle up your emotions, whether positive or not, bc jumin’s route wasn’t lying, it really does start killing you from inside). But I’m glad that Cheritz allowed for MC to show empathy and be compassionate, because I do think he deserves to have a happy ending. 

All of you do, okay?^^ You all deserve a happy ending, and if any one of you feels lost, or need someone to talk to, I’m here! I’m not just saying this for the heck of it, I’m willing to do whatever I can to make you believe in yourself again.

anonymous asked:

Bringing back old topic but I couldn't help it. As I remember you wrote that you tried bacon as gateway meat and you didn't like it so you probably wouldn't like any other. It's like trying only bananas and saying all fruits are not for you. I'm not against vegetarians, only unreasonable generalization. Hope I didn't sound rude, have a nice day~

Yeah, but dude here’s the thing. I like being a vegetarian. I’ve been one my whole life, it’s good for me, It’s not hard to get protein (I was on the varsity weightlifting team in high school and didn’t have any problems) and being a vegetarian is pretty nice to my wallet. And honestly the idea of eating meat this late in the game is kind of a weird concept to me now. I have nothing against other people eating meat, I just don’t think it’s for me.

Also, I don’t have the gut flora for meat so I’m like 90 percent sure that if I ate any it would wreck my insides for a while. That happened with the bacon. 

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Ahren and his penguin bf in target
(Pls don’t take gifs or remove caption)

And now one more thing from me, that maybe no one will actually see but that’s probably for the better. Since it’s awkward. I don’t know if platonic crushes over online people have a name, but they should have one, because I don’t know how else to call that feel of ‘Damn they are so precious, they may not even know I exist but I’d fight to the death for them.’

wait a second. someone actually found me attractive and was interested in getting to know me. like… H O W.

no one irl was ever interested in me

is this finally the year?? thought this would never happen ;w; oh gosh self-esteem 10+

I don’t know what’s happening with me but lately I’ve been feeling so needy, like I want a boyfriend to cuddle with me and kiss me and hug me and watch movies with me and have randomly rood trips but at the same time I’m perfectly fine being single and independent 

anonymous asked:

About trans women and womanhood thing. Like about how less people id as trans women, it's something I've noticed happening a lot lately too to the point a lot of people who I did know as being trans women are now nb and a lot go by 'they/them' now. I'm very interested on your thoughts on it which is why I asked, I'm just not very good at understanding complex writing

yeah that’s exactly what i’m talking about. it’s weird, right? like, bear in mind i’m just idly speculating here and you should take everything i’m saying with a grain of salt, but i’ve noticed there’s a lot of overlap between

(1) people who are vocally reidentifying out of trans womanhood

(2) people who think the holdouts in trans lesbian separatism &/or ‘baeddelism’ are the antichrist. more specifically, that they’re all white supremacists, rapists, generally regressive, and somehow equivalent to TWEFs despite the two social histories and positionalities being totally different–i’ve even heard the word ‘misandrist’ a few times. and like, i have some pretty serious objections to transsep politics, but i’ve never once seen any of those claims substantiated in more than two years of knowing many many people who identify or once identified that way.

(3) people who think it’s somehow reprehensible not to prioritize men–trans or otherwise–in their feminism or gender criticism (there’s a parallel there with the demand for ‘nuance’ in writing tossed around by some kinda TWEFy bloggers here), some of whom go as far as claiming ‘transmisandry’ is somehow a thing, and that it’s trans women who propagate it

(4) people who want to get rid of transmisogyny as a way of analyzing gender relations, claiming it’s just ‘transantagonism plus misogyny’ and completely ignoring intersectionality for this one specific case and only this one specific case. i’ve seen a number of disidentified trans women claim that ‘transmisogyny’ implies that trans women don’t face misogyny like cis women do and are therefore lesser…which is, like, ridiculous on its face.

(5) people who are really into the callout scene and are not only okay with destroying a person’s life based on something they read on the internet, but also seem oblivious to the fact that all the people targeted by intracommunity ‘callouts’ are–without exception–lesbian or sga trans women

(6) people who demand ‘accountability’ in those situations without making it possible or even specifying what that means, and who apparently prefer carceral or punitive justice over restorative justice

(7) self-described MLMs (lmao) who’ve never read any marxist theory

(8) people who tacitly or explicitly believe that nonbinary identities are (somehow) more radical than womanhood of any kind, which is pretty much just garden variety mogai identitarianism by another name.

like i’m not necessarily saying this is all being consciously orchestrated, but it feels really suspicious that it’s happening at the same time as a global rise in literal fascism. like, it feels like people are willing to give up anything–their identities, decades of social theory built for them by people like them, etc–and appeal to or align themselves with people higher up the social food chain if it means they won’t be facing that alone. or at least, like, that they’re willing to make completely unreasonable sacrifices in the name of coalitionism without expecting or receiving any in return. though, again, this could all be my paranoia talking.

i'm a hella slut for transgirl!patrick headcannons and i have no idea why??

like patrick’s not even a particularly feminine person they’re just kind of my favourite thing

like her coming out to pete and being super super nervous because she thinks he’s gonna be weirded out or dump her but he’s super supportive and switches almost instantly to calling her by her new name and pronouns & the first time pete calls her ‘baby girl’ or 'pretty girl’ she actually almost Cries because she’s so happy

or her and pete coming up with a code phrase for when somebody’s being a transphobic piece of shit and making her uncomfortable or angry, like they’re somewhere and somebody is like “i don’t get this whole 'transgender bathrooms’ thing, i mean, the way you’re born is the way you are, just use the male restrooms” and trisha gives pete The Look and is like “honey, i think we forgot to /feed the cat/ before we left” and pete immediately knows they need to Leave before trish cracks some skulls

or an early on pre-hiatus one where pete calls her a lot of patrick-related nicknames while she’s having a particularly dysphoric day & she hits a breaking point and accidentally comes out to the whole band without really thinking about it because she just goes “that’s not my name” a lot sterner and louder than she meant to, she didn’t mean for anyone to hear her, and everybody just looks at her, super confused, and she’s like “fuck” so she explains it the best she can and pete’s supportive, andy’s happy as long as she is, and joe flat out goes “i mean i’ve heard weirder so, i’ll adjust,” but they all promise to protect her from idiotic people and pete offers to 'get rid of’ her guy clothes for her and buy her new stuff because “i know a guy who needs bonfire fuel”

just. transgirl!patrick au’s/headcannons. i’m Very here for them, send me All of them pls & thank.

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I’m Fine.

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lycanthropoyremade  asked:

i'm not sure if you'll see this tbh but i just wanted to thank you ?? like this kind of weird lmao but stuff has been really tough for me lately and i've lost a lot of people in my family over the past 4 weeks and sitting down and watching your streams while i draw or do whatever has really helped me!! it's really good distraction and you're hilarious and literally always make me smile so thank u so much for being you!! you make a lot of people happy and we all appreciate what you do ;w;

Thank you so much for this ask, it really warms my heart when I see stuff like this. Sometimes babby joel has days when he’s down too, but knowing that people enjoy my streams and make them smile puts a smile on my face back. You and so many others matter the world to me, thank you.

  • Remus was freaking out. He didn’t have any idea how to start his new book and the deadline was so close he already could feel the editor breathing down his neck.
  • He had everything. Characters, plot, setting. It was perfectly written and rewritten a couple of times, it could be his best book. If only he had the beginning.
  • It was his first romance novel. He already had his own readers after publishing three poetry books and a historical novel. But it was something new and it could be another start for him or the very end.
  • Remus walked around London for a few days, trying to find inspiration and dumbly staring at trees (and hot people, let’s be honest).
  • Usually he spent a couple of hours in the park next to his apartment, visited an amazing bakery and went home. It became every day routine for him and a friendly man in the bakery, James, was the only person he talked to in almost two weeks.
  • Today was especially good. The sun hot just enough, a light wind and the sky perfectly blue. He was sitting in the grass with his laptop and trying to make his characters meet each other already. It was a late hour yet he didn’t want to go home, too comfortable and relaxed. Hungry as well, so he stood with a sigh to go to the bakery, promising himself to come back immediately.
  • When he walked into the bakery, a gorgeous man in leather pants with long black hair (those just were the first things Remus noticed) was standing next to James, laughing. At the sight of Remus, he took a big baguette from the counter and waved to James goodbye, coming to the door. He smiled at Remus before going out.
  • Remus looked after him a few seconds after he was gone, enchanted by probably the most beautiful human being he’s ever seen, and called hello to James.
  • He was back to his lovely spot on the grass ten minutes later with two croissants and a bear claw. The closer night was, the more people gathered around. He was surrounded by two lovely girls holding hands, an old woman with an extra enthusiastic dog who kept rolling her eyes at them and -and! - the stranger from the bakery.
  • Who was acting rather weirdly. He had a bunch of pigeons around him and were throwing small pieces of the baguette to them, which could be quite normal if he didn’t try to talk to those pigeons. Could it be even called trying to talk? Mostly he laughed and made cooing noises and nodded.
  • Remus was staring. It happened almost unintentionally and he understood it only when the guy turned to him with a big grin on his face.
  • “Are you enjoying the view or questioning my psychic stability?”
  • Actually, it was both.
  • “Um,” Remus blushed, “I just… like to watch pigeons, that’s it.”  
  • “Oh,” his grin grew bigger and one of his eyebrows raised higher, “And here I thought it was my utter beauty. What is your name, pigeons-admirer?”
  • “Remus,” he cleared his throat,”He/him. And yours?”
  • “Sirius.”
  • “And why do you mock poor pigeons, Sirius?” Remus felt the corners of his mouth twitch when Sirius placed his hand on his heart with an indignant expression.
  • “Me?? Never!” he almost yelled and started pouting. Remus laughed and he pouted harder before smiling too.
  • “Okay, what I’m gonna say will sound ridiculous,” Sirius announced, still smiling and catching the sight of Remus’s freckles beaming in the sun.
  • “Ridiculous actions usually have ridiculous explanations, yeah. Go on,” Remus smirked, too aware that now Sirius was staring at him.
  • “It helps to find inspiration or make up my mind,” Sirius shrugged, “Sometimes I actually talk to them, sometimes I just sit and well, you saw. Sometimes I invent stories about them. This is Helga,” he pointed at a fat white pigeon, “She has three children and her husband August - he’s the brown one at her left - wants to form a jazz band, this is why they argue a lot. Helga doesn’t want a jazz band.”
  • “Sounds like a thing you do about strangers, not pigeons,” Remus chuckled, watching as Helga furiously was trying to take the bread away from August.
  • “But it’s more soothing than with people. And pigeons are funnier to watch. Here we go, Minnie pecked Dolly again, these two just can’t get on,” he added.
  • “Okay, it does sound ridiculous, but I like it,” Remus smiles and when Sirius smiles back, he’s absurdly satisfied.
  • Tomorrow he tries Sirius’s method and has the beginning of the story ready in his head by late evening, thanks to Enjolras and Grantaire, young bird lovers.
  • Two days later he gives his first romance novel to the editor, who likes it a lot, and comes back to his spot to find Sirius sitting there and grinning at him.
  • At the end of the week he has a date with the most ridiculous and the most charming person he’s ever met. Needless to say, Sirius asks him out by naming two pigeons Sirius and Remus and telling that Sirius gives a strong vibe of liking Remus.

anonymous asked:

We joke a lot about Arima being Sasaki's dad but what if he really is Sasaki/Kaneki's dad in a weird way? Like, what if Kaneki was 'made' from a younger Arima's genetic material? Also, what if Dr. Kanou is Arima's 'dad' (and Arima is a genetically modified human) and the mysterious bodyguard that was with the doctor in ch 92 is Arima himself? (omg it's very late here and I'm just dumping all of my conspiration theories in your askbox, pls forgive me ;_; ) -anonymouse

Woah, this headcanon is pretty intense. don’t worry, I’m coo with theories in my askbox.

This ended up PREEEEEEETTY long since I had a revelation in between. TRUST ME, THIS IS ONE HELL OF A RIDE.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

There's a thread on GAF and they are speculating that Giant Bomb is in danger of disappearing/that the website hasn't been doing well lately. I know it's GAF and they are usually full of shit but I'm still a little worried and I don't really follow the business side of the website. Is there any veracity to their claims or is this just GAF being GAF?

Wait, a message board thread is speculating about things they don’t actually know anything about? Weird.

Here’s the short version: If I didn’t still think that there was a way for us to create the content we want to create and grow into something bigger and cooler, I would have left last year.

I’m tempted to leave it at that since forum junk like that typically doesn’t warrant an answer, but the site’s actually doing really well. Just kinda slogging through the process of getting budget shit locked down and putting a proper “let’s actually get some more people in here because this is completely ridiculous” plan together. It’s taken forever to get to this point but it seems like everyone is finally in basic agreement about pushing a reasonably-sized pile of money my way and letting me spend it on humans.

We should get that new video player pushed out next week, and that comes with a larger code merge that’ll make it easier for engineers to actually add new features to the site. We’re talking about finding better ways to showcase premium videos as one of the early things we’d like to change, and the wiki needs some additional attention (but that’s a larger, more difficult project). We’ll start messing around with mid-roll video ads in the near future, but it looks like we’re going to eventually remove ads for monthly members, too. It’s sort of a careful balancing act between bringing money in so we can continue to afford additional hires without making the site look like garbage or putting 100% of our stuff behind a paywall. The podcast ads seem to be doing especially well. I’d like to bring back a free, regular live show at some point.

We’re also talking about road trips and tours and bringing back the Big Live Live Show and a bunch of other wild shit, but that’s all further off, just kinda kicking ideas around at the moment.

anonymous asked:

Hi Emily! I'm 19 years old and I've been struggling lately. I am in my second year of college and a virgin. I used to not let it bother me when my friends would tell me about how they lost theirs, but now I'm starting to think why guys don't like me. It's caused me to have a lot of self-body hate and I'm not sure what I can do to get me out of this. Any suggestions?

Hello lovely. First off, being a 19 year old virgin is not weird. Whether or not you’ve had opportunities to bone doesn’t have anything to do with guys liking you or not. Sometimes guys bone girls they don’t like. The world is a weird place. 

Your first step of getting out if it, as you put it, is to divorce your liking of your body from your relationship to men. They are two very separate things.

I’m a body self-hater from way back when. I hated my body for so long because I was so much bigger than the other kids in my class. I hated  anything that made me different from them. There were days when I wanted to unzip my body and just step out of it and away from myself, and those days were numerous. I was so busy comparing my body to other people’s that I no longer existed in my own eyes at some point. I had become invisible. 

Then I started hooking up with boys, and I thought “Oh, so that’s what my body is for. It’s for men!” Everything I did was in service of making a guy turned on, or just like me. I still hated my body, but now I was sacrificing it to the dudes I was handing it over to. I wasn’t getting any pleasure out of this arrangement, and didn’t think I deserved it. Basically, what I’m saying is that from 8 to roughly 22, my body was only a thing in relation to other people, and it only hurt me. 

A couple of things got me to start appreciating (or being annoyed) with my body on my own terms. 

1) I started exercising. It wasn’t something I’d done a lot of before, and it helped me to appreciate my body as an instrument that moved me around, not an instrument for stupid bass player boys. It’s not about losing weight or any of that bullshit, it’s about understanding your own anatomy. It’s about seeing the cool things it can do. It’s about getting out of your head. 

2) I took burlesque dance classes. If they are not offered where you are, see if you can find belly dancing, or just something other than Zumba. The importance here is discovering a brand of sexuality in yourself that isn’t about other people, just you and the mirror. It’s going to feel stupid at first, but it helped me tremendously. 

3) Therapy. Not because I was in crisis, but to help me challenge my long-held assumptions about myself and what my body meant.

My body belongs to me now, and I have the option of sharing it with others, but it’s mine and I love it, even if some days I don’t like it very much. You’ll never love your body every single day (and if you do, tell me how you accomplished that), but it’s the only vessel you have for getting you through this world, your only real companion in this life. It’s yours, and it does amazing things and gross things. It’s no one else’s. Get to know it. The boys will be there when you’re done.