it's hard for me to show kindness to people that hate me

The truth is…
— 

Aries:

  • is a sassy bitch, let’s just accept that. always answering back, they’d even answer back to any god (may it be diplomatically or sarcastic)
  • always give people cheap gifts not because they’re broke but because they think that’s the only standard or gift you deserve
  • has a huge disgust with humanity so they either get delusions of controlling the world or they avoid/limit their human interactions
  • their logic is out of this world: it’s either you get mesmerised and see a new horizon or you end up getting crazy because you can’t get it
  • beneath all their layers, they’re one of the smartest and hardworking people out there… always willing to help you study/work/etc.

Taurus: 

  • their trigger word is literally food and all its proper nouns. they’d sell their souls for a ceaseless supply of food and they’d won’t regret
  • literally possessive as fuck, aphrodite lives in their titties cos they dun calm down if they see someone circling around their man/woman.
  • obsessed with getting shit organised y'all don’t even know. they will never move unless a very detailed blue print is in front of them.
  • they will keep hustlin more than a twenty of you combined. they know and prioritise how precious time and money are.
  • when they say they can’t do an errand/plea, dun quickly believe them at all cost or you’ll get a small surprise: they’ll do it after some while. 

Gemini: 

  • know that archetype of a kind person who’ll obey & follow you to the death but has so many fucking personal motives? yep, that’s gemini.
  • their knowledge and expertise are vastly scary; multilingual people and historians. they aint called GEMinis for nothing, hunty.
  • for them, it’s a dog-eat-dog world. if you don’t match their pace, you’re basically out of their surviving list, whatever list that is.
  • insanely in love and proud making other people swoon over them (oh the oozing warmth of being loved and respected) but says otherwise
  • bad at remembering dates but that dun mean they love you less or you’re not that important to them, just believe in them.

Cancer:

  • they dun talk much but best believe me, whenever they speak it’s either they gon hand you your ass or roast the living shit out of you
  • are all terminally sarcastic bless their souls. they don’t have time for your bullshit, they don’t even have time for their own.
  • they will never side or they will avoid picking a side. they’re the best people to rant cos they will literally get where you coming from.
  • one of the sweetest and loving signs out there but for some reason, they tend to have some problems making real long time friends.
  • always look brooding or even out of reach. that’s cos they’re afraid words/actions won’t come/show they way they really want them too.

Leo:

  • so demure but once you get close to them/they know they have the upper control, they will fucking nag & bully everything
  • but after the searing primadonna stage, these lions are all just smol precious clumsy beans who must be protected at all cost
  • knows the traditional ways or romancing someone, like the flowers and cupcakes and shy yet formal asking you out for events/dates
  • easily clouded by false/dark ideas and hard to snap them out of it. it takes another brave alpha who can help them out of the cray
  • but don’t be fooled, these lions can be tamed and would be willing to tag along the right people for the rest of their life line.

Virgo:

  • dont slack off in front of them, they will give your ass a whoop back to reality. trust me, they give so much vigour and moral to people.
  • not easily scared of pretty much anything because they always think about the story/reason behind it, for this one, what made it scary?
  • they can get super fucking salty and shady and they aint afraid of being salty and shady, for a good or bad reason whatsoever.
  • they never fail to always see the bigger picture, that also means they’re not afraid to do everything to get to the biggest picture.
  • loves having fun and enjoying life without taking advantage of things or forgetting to be humble and well-grounded.

Libra: 

  • too pure for this world but these people have a skyrocketing tendencies to becoming a yandere (lol they probably already are)
  • their aesthetic perfectionism sickness is practically beyond all earth signs combined: they’ll set fire on anything lower than their standards.
  • too kind and angelic we dun deserve them. we also dun deserve their life sucking flirtatious killer charms. we just dun deserve then all in all
  • these bitches love to meddle with other people’s business tho. either they save the situation or aggravate it, there’s no in between
  • even with all the hate on their kind, libra people just keep their heads up and tryn’a understand and accept other people’s view of them.

Scorpio: 

  • for the vagillionth time, y'all have to remember that these “””devil children””” are all just 4D weird bastards who easily space out.
  • the sexy airheads we all get from anime. but dun cross them & their fambam, they won’t think twice about apathetically cutting you.
  • everyone’s fairy godmother/father cos if they love you & they see you deserving, they will lavish &treat you so great. aint lying, dis the truth
  • willing to learn from others but is obsessed with “i am the most mature one so my wisdom is the greatest and the only effective one”
  • so many layers, like they’re literally never-ending. but after plucking all these layers out, you’ll see a fragile marshmallow baby inside 

Sagittarius:

  • they need like a dozen of hobbies as outlets for their energy. if they don’t get the energy out, they become a host of a time bomb.
  • insatiably absorbs all information of all kinds like a baby on his mom’s chest or a tic sucking out blood from a fresh catch: you choose
  • no one really knows if they’re showing genuine reaction/emotion cos you don’t know if they’re forcing it or not or they dun even know too
  • is the jack of all trades cos they have so many talents but can’t focus and drill hard on one cos they jump from different talent to another
  • may come arrogant but always they always want everyone to be happy and enjoying the time, probably more than how libra wants it.

Capricorn: 

  • always late on almost everything. insomniac children of the night, so no matter how dire the situation is, they’ll always be late. deal with it.
  • condescending as fuck cos they know they can do pretty much anything please beware they are vicious machiavellians
  • obsessed with segregating people in their lives; they don’t want their friends to socialise with their family, this group with that group, etc.
  • avoids and gets easily tired with human interaction, but is magically brilliant with human interaction. their magic? idek ask them.
  • after you pass their scrutinising sifting of people in their lives, you’ll just see a funny, dependent, happy-go-lucky, perverted side of them

Aquarius:

  • also don’t like taking sides, will never jump onto anything without all the cards are seeable, yet also not afraid to speak up in the end.
  • obsessed and deranged with their fanaticism of any horror shit idk how they can carry on with a fine stomach after all that scary jazz
  • can never be controlled, they might seem controllable or easy to manoeuvre but spare your ass and don’t be fooled by this sign
  • disappears and reappears at their own will, and doesn’t care about the consequences of their absence, they literally don’t care.
  • in the end of the day, aquarius has no fucks to give any of the other signs. they don’t ask for a lot and they just wanna be left alone.

Pisces:

  • are quiet little shits who looks way more gorgeous when they’re mad cos they just turn fiendish but still in a cute way, like wtf how???
  • needs a fuck ton of guidance from older or more mature people cos they tend either the laziest, silliest, or most annoying things ever. 
  • how fucking annoying it is whenever they pull out the victim card like dude shove that thing back where it belongs or so I will.
  • are actually sensible people, kinda shocking for some but it’s the truth cos these people stay in tune with their emotions, they dun run away
  • break them to pieces and you’ll see a child needing to be loved and wanting to know what are the things that they can improve and learn

Aries: Broken hearts and bloodstained fingers, your voice reminds me of a lively melody. A warriors heart with a delicate soul, an unlikely combination you put together so well. You have it hard, don’t you? Yet you get up with only the skin at your knees scraped and dripping red.

Taurus: The reminiscence of a rose - the single flower that’s so impossible to hate, delicate and pretty, even when it stops blooming. Your voice could calm even the most chaotic oceans, always soothing with soft notes of comfort. Even your eyes could mesmerise the most soulless creature; your sweet face leaves me dreaming in heartache.

Gemini: Your eyes twinkle with mischief, what are you thinking about? That’s what I always wonder, the curve of your mouth always makes me suspect. I love your mind, I think that’s my favourite thing of yours, you tell me so much I cannot help but wonder the things you leave unsaid.

Cancer: Lovely eyes filled with unspilled tears, how can you be so wonderful? I’ve always said that, people who can feel so much have the capacity to be the kindest. How have you not broken yet? I think I can admire that. Sensitive, emotional, I dream of you. Your heart reminds me of an endless sea, so much you leave undiscovered.

Leo: It’s enamouring, how full of life you are - your soul could rival the sun, it’s as if you shimmer with the promise of eternal bliss. Perhaps that’s why you so easily win the hearts of all; so golden and glamorous. I’ve always said your gaze held the most wonderful of stars, even now I can still count them; youthful and shining. I think it might be impossible to ever fully hate you, your warmth is far too compelling.

Virgo: I find it odd that you can’t see your beauty, it’s always been so obvious to me. Why must you be so harsh to yourself? Especially when you’re so obviously perfect. I think it’s your innocence that draws me in most, always so pure and lovely; like the sweetest rose. I wish I could win your heart, but I know I’m undeserving. Yet there’s a gentleness in you I can’t help but have.

Libra: Ah, Aphrodite’s purest creation - how could you not adore such a thing? There’s a sweet nostalgia of love about you that makes my heart ache; as if I miss a love I never had. I think your nativity is what makes you so pure amongst the rest of us. There’s an underlying softness to everything you do.

Scorpio: I don’t think there are enough words to describe you, your depths are unfathomable. I think here lies the true meaning of profound. There’s a frustrating beauty in you I can’t seem to point out, perhaps it’s because it’s so buried. You are kind, so very kind, I don’t understand where people see your darkness. Or perhaps I do. I think it’s in your eyes, how dark they seem even when you smile. They’re the eyes of someone who has seen tragedies, yet you arose from them with a certain light and grace that can’t help but seem lovely.

Sagittarius: An adventurer, a wandering soul always searching for its next quest - you’ve danced with the sun and conversed with the stars. The universe knows you better than you know yourself. You are wild and brimming with the promises of life, so much too see, so much to learn! There is truly nothing more lovely than the life of one who experiences, I see the whole world when I’m with you.

Capricorn: Cold eyes and shy smiles, I know you’re gentler than you believe. Your stars are least private in December, perhaps that’s why it’s my favourite month. I admire your patience the most, it brings peace to my fiery spirit. It’s funny, how unemotional you portray yourself - your soul warming smile contradicts that in every way, it’s unexpected yet not at all surprising.

Aquarius: The ruler of rebellion, invention and revolution - it’s as if you shake the world awake. Your mind is the strangest place I love to be in, show me all your thoughts; especially the ones you’d never think of sharing. A lover and a loner, detached yet still connected, you always leave me wondering.

Pisces: The moon tells me tales of your heart every month when she’s full and shining, I wonder how it hasn’t burst yet. She tells me there’s a beautiful idealism to you, I don’t think there’s a single dream you haven’t dreamt. I think it’s beautiful, how such a pure soul can exist. My heart aches when I hear the stars whisper soft words of comfort you every night you disappear into yourself; licking wounds and drowning in sorrows - your sensitivity is what’s most raw. I hope one day you can find your heart.

—  My Thoughts On The Signs

Alright kids. It’s been awhile, so it’s time to buckle up for another one of my Patented Mob Psycho 100 Essay/Meta posts (patent not pending).

As much as I love and appreciate how Studio BONES adapted Mob Psycho 100, one of the things that always bothered me is how they adapted 100% Sadness.

Y’see, in the anime, it’s a fairly quick buildup. It’s clean and it’s pretty.

Mob wakes up to rubble where a school once stood.

The beautiful Ghibli tears roll down as he realizes what’s happened.

He curls up as the emotions well up within him.

And he unleashes 100% Sadness as sparkling tears cascade down towards the audience.

It’s so sad, right? Super sad! Poor Mob!!

But in the manga, things are….slightly different.

Mob wakes up not sitting neatly with his feet folded underneath him, but instead sprawled out on his hands and knees, hair in a frenzy from his psychic powers still being active. He’s not looking straight ahead at the remnants of the school, but upwards at the destruction still going on in the sky above, like some kind of giant looming over him. Mob doesn’t just look small. This shows how he feels small.

The narrator explains Mob’s thoughts in further detail here. It’s not just “Mob wakes up, realizes he Hecked Up, and feels Really Sad about that.”

This is Mob’s trauma, a thing that has made him feel helpless and alone. It’s the thing he hates about himself. And while the audience can certainly infer this from the animation alone, hearing it (or reading it, in this case) helps compound this fact and draw it out. It’s not just sadness Mob feels, it’s many, many complex negative feelings he’s been storing away inside himself for 4 agonizing years.

His percentage meter slowly ticks up and the thoughts and feelings build up–

And he begins to bawl.

Not dainty fat dollops rolling neatly down the middle of his cheeks. Not cutesy sparkly anime shoujo tears.

This is some absolutely unrepentant ugly crying.

This is Mob feeling so overwhelmed, that the careful control he’s practiced his entire life isn’t just gingerly removed, but absolutely smashed to smithereens. His tears pool and drip out of his mouth like drool. He can’t even fathom how gross it must look because he is so overcome with built-up negative feelings that he has never allowed himself to express.

His percentage meter peaks at 100% and then–

It’s panels like these that really tick me off when people say ONE isn’t a good artist. Because in comics, good art isn’t just drawing people realistically or with proper proportions. Good art is utilizing the space in a panel to convey meaning and symbolism to help tell the story.

Mob isn’t just curling up into a ball here. He collapses into a bow before his own powers that overwhelm him from a story standpoint and also overwhelm the panel.

Rubble cascades down from the sky, mimicking his own tears and the likes of rain. It is so powerful, it encroaches past the black border at the top of the panel, dominating the scene. The weight of it and his own sadness presses him into the earth.

This panel, this expression, shows how not just miserable this whole affair has made him, but how absolutely terrified he is. Mob at this point has been under Reigen’s tutelage for 4 years.

He never knew any other espers growing up. Reigen was his one hope at learning to control and stop this aspect of himself, and he is currently watching that hope churn amidst the remains of the school, shredded to pieces all around him.

The contrast of the calm emptiness of the bottom left only intensifies the sheer chaos of his powers at work around him in the top and right.

This is Mob’s duality.

The anime ends the scene with Mob watching as he neatly mends Teru’s school back together, his back turned to the audience. It’s nearly identical to the panel in the manga, but there are several key differences:

1. You can still see the cracks and tears in the school, despite Mob fixing it

2. Mob has his back to the school, turned away from it.

3. The lightning flashing in the background.

Let’s break these points down.

1. The cracks in the school stood out to me the first time I read this scene. What it portrays is that although Mob certainly “fixed” the school, he can never totally “undo” what has just happened, no matter how hard he tries. The narrator even makes this point–this was Mob’s “meager” attempt at fixing the situation. Even if he did somehow manage to repair the school to functionality, there will no doubt be remnants of damage and evidence of the destruction it went through. Contrasted with the anime where the school is neatly glued back together, it feels at odds, and even contradictory to the narrator’s previous insertion.

2. Mob is not looking at the school. He does not want to face the aftermath of what he’s done. He can try to mend the situation all he likes, but ultimately the end result is the same: He failed to change. In yet another spectacular use of composition, the destruction directly looming over his head in the background is a perfect mirror to his current mental state. Where Mob expresses, things are broken.

3. The grey overcast of the anime coupled with the soft strumming of the guitar carries sadness, but in a cathartic way. (After all, crying is known to help bring back chemical balance when our brains are overwhelmed with emotion.)

The manga, by contrast, feels foreboding. The framing of the scene shows Mob just below the chaos of his powers returning the school to its prior shape, him large and especially prominent, as opposed to smaller and meeker in the anime. Most importantly, there is lightning flashing in the background. There are no gentle sunbeams peaking through after a harsh rain, there are no soft painterly textures in the clouds.

It is still dark. The clouds are not soft nor comforting. Lightning flashes to signal continuing storms and danger. It is a warning:

This is not the last time we will see such cataclysmic destruction.

Hogwarts Headcannons
  • Give me Dean, muggleborn that he is, imitating Steve Irwin in Care of Magical Creatures class, much to everyone's confusion except for Harry and Hermione who are. On the ground. Unable to breathe. And refusing to explain why.
  • Give me Harry, demisexual that he is, realizing that the reason he can't stop obsessing over Draco is because Draco is the one who saw - and subsequently disliked - 'Harry', and not The Boy Who Lived. Realizing that Draco was the only one to first talk to him for HIM, in that robe shop, and not his parents or fame (because even Ron and Hermione did that at first). And thus, leading to him randomly starting crying in the middle of lunch and claiming he's doomed, much to everyone's fear.
  • Give me Seamus, pyro that he is, super happy one Christmas when Hermione buys him a book on fire caution, flammable materials, and elements such as magnesium. Thus afterward, the mysterious fires that have always happened are far more safe and controlled.
  • Give me Luna, wonderful airhead that she is, being stared at as, calm as anything, she waltzes right into the Slytherin common room and starts talking to the mermaids like its absolutely normal. A first year drops a book he's staring so hard, because HOW DID SHE KNOW THE PASSWORD. Draco just sighs, gets up, goes over to her, and offers her tea.
  • Give me Draco. Who looks on as Neville offers Harry rhubarb pie that he made himself, as Harry stares forlornly at his Treacle Tart, and makes and annoyed sound. "Dammit Longbottom he hates bittersweets." The Slytherins stare and Pansy just mutters "How do you even know these things. Merlin, help him realize."
  • Give me Parvati, who is being constantly mistaken for her sister by Ron, who panics and screams "IM A LESBIAN" when it gets to be too much.
  • Give me Ron, who stares wide-eyes from a distance whenever he sees Padma from that moment on for a full week, until Padma flips out too and hexes him. Parvati awkwardly wonders why Ron starts getting scared whenever she tries to approach from then on, since she knows Ron doesn't have problems due to that sort of thing from how he handles Harry.
  • Give me the thirty or so of the school's Muggle-raised, who made the mistake of showing their folks howlers, and react accordingly whenever one of the families sends one that is just a recording of Rick Astley, or High School Musical, or spoilers for Doctor Who. And the Wizard-raised just... staring... in fear... watching their savior and multiple other students as they run around screaming and crying in an absolute panic for some reason even though it was a different student that got the weird howler.
  • Give me Harry, whose hair surprises people by being dark red like his mother's when in direct sunlight. And usually at the Weasley den they're inside, but one day Harry joins them outside for a picnic, and Molly is so confused about where Harry went to then has do do a mental tally of her children.
  • Give me George, who in the midst of the final battle, hit Lucius with an Anaticula curse, so that every spell he tries makes a duck instead. And the Death Eaters are just so confused. "Lucius... is that a duck?"
  • Give me the Gryffindor common room. The new first years suggest Monopoly for game night. The entire room goes dead silent. One first year tries to ask what they did wrong. "Never mention that game again," is the only response they get. "But why-" "NEVER TALK ABOUT SIXTH YEAR. WE NEVER TALK ABOUT SIXTH YEAR." Their brave upperclassman Neville yells, trembling. Hermione starts crying. Harry goes into a panic attack. Ron whispers, "There are many reasons we don't talk about sixth year. If The Incident had been the only thing that happened, we would only not talk about The Incident. Many things happened that year. Thus, we do not speak of that year, or of that game."
  • Give me McGonagall, who struggles to control the cat population, because while students are told to have their cats fixed you know not all 100 students that brought cats did so. Her curling up around a litter that lost their mother to illness. Training them to stalk the corridors. Albus had his ways of getting information, and hers is the spy network of cats.
  • Give me muggleborns singing everything from Phantom of the Opera to Katy Perry in the corridors. Singing We Will Rock You to a pureblood who disses them for it. The purebloods thinking the weird songs and their tunes are some kind of Rite of Passage and fleeing whenever a muggleborn student starts singing. Altering song lyrics. "I throw my ferret in the air some-times, singin EEEEEEEYO, this is DRAAAAAACO!"
  • Give me muggleborns that are really confused about the whole quill instead of pens things, throwing transfigured pokeballs in Care of Magical Creatures, the band students bringing kazoos and harmonicas and the wizrd-raised students that are just so confused as to how those things even work, because it must be some sort of air magic, right??
  • Give me muggleborns making entire conversations out of pop culture references specifically to confuse some Slytherin who just called one girl a Mudblood. "These are not the droids you were looking for." "I'm right on top of that now Rose, I promise." -jazz hands-
  • Give me muggleborns with Patronus that are things like Pikachu, velociraptors, the quiet Canadian transfer student with a moose patronus the size of a SMALL HOUSE, the one whose is a angeled-out Castiel, the one whose patronus is the democrat donkey and another the republican elephant and the two, previously best friends, become mortal enemies rivaling the fame of Harry and Draco.
  • Give me muggleborns hugging each other before break, promising to 'call' each other, trading weird codes, how they can't wait to go for 'sushi' or planning that trip together to 'disneyland' where they can go flying?? But no one's allowed magic?? Or flying?? And the wizard-raised think that somehow, shockingly,<i> these children totally new to our world have developed a way to cheat the system?? Muggleborns are badasses!!</i>
  • Give me muggleborns who are fully aware that the anti-tech wards were made when, like, radios barely even existed, much less cellphone towers and microprocessors, so while they can't turn them on inside the stone school walls there's this group that Harry joins constantly that just sit there in silence staring at these tiny things and sometimes randomly laughing hysterically, and every now and then standing and just running all the way across to the other side of the lake all at the same time with no signal whatsoever. The purebloods are <i>terrified</i> of this frequent happening.
  • Give me Harry, Hermione, Dean, and Justin from the D.A, muggleborns they are, doing a movie night every week to help the D.A. relax and bond. They re-start this after the battles, during eighth year, with several other people such as the returned Slytherins joining in. The entire year they play things like Tangled, The Breakfast Club, Brave, Lion King. But then the last four weeks, they announce they don't want to mislead everyone that everything is all fun and rainbows. The last four movies are My Sister's Keeper, The Shining, Marley and Me, and for the last week, a marathon of the entire Jurassic Park series.
  • Give me Hufflepuffs, who secretly are very relieved to be the 'normal' House. Jocks over there, know-it-alls over there, goth wannabees over there, now lets go camp out by the kitchens we're gonna need it to survive the next seven years like this.
  • Give me Ravenclaws who are so done with the riddles when they stumble back at midnight after having fallen asleep in the Library. "What's the truth?" "THE TRUTH IS THAT I WILL SET YOU ON FIRE IF YOU DON'T LET ME IN."
  • Give me the Trio, who use the Marauder's Map to find the most absolutely ridiculous routes to class, knowing every single one of the shortcuts. It's not odd for them to simply appear out of the ceiling. One day the new first years try to follow them, to learn the school better, but it doesn't go so well because then they try to go through a disappearing wall the Trio just did they instead run headfirst into it, and the next time they do behind a tapestry, down a waterside, around some sort of tower, causally past an entire doorless room full of bats, and somehow come out on the complete other side of the castle.
  • Give me Draco whose just completely had it with Harry's staring and confronts him, like they always do, and Harry just blurts out that he likes Draco's new haircut and can he touch his hair, and Draco so shocked he lets him. "Potter stop treating me like a cat I'm evil remember? Bloody hell have you gone daft?!" "But... it's soft..." "I hate you." But he just can't find any anger over this, so there's like no venom whatsoever in it and Harry can't stop giggling.
  • Give me Ginny, who can't stop giggling as Luna confuses the fuck out of an entire crowd with her way of speaking, and who during seventh year could 100% get away with insulting the Death Eaters because of the way she said things. Who after Luna used said tactic to get her out of a Crucio punishment just clung to Luna, shaking, and realizing that she loves Luna so much for this very reason. That there will never be another person like Luna in her life, ever.
  • Give me Harry, who was not really well educated while living at the Dursleys, who couldn't read very well but was wonderful at sneaking around, little tricks like hiding things, and loved music. He taught himself magic tricks, and MERLIN ALMIGHTY THIS 11 YEAR OLD KID HAS MASTERED VANISHING SPELLS, WHAT, HOW, and Percy, uptight prefect he is, just looses it.
  • Give me Ron walking in on Harry talking to some random snake in their dorm room, laughing like the snake said a particularly good joke, tipping his head and smiling as he responds, the python slowly curling up his arm to rest over his shoulder. Ron freezes, stares, and then slowly backs away, closes the door and stands there staring at it for a full half hour in absolute horror.
  • Give me the rest of the D.A. walking into the Room of Requirement and hearing screaming, Dean shrieking that he's going to murder someone, Hermione crying, Justin cursing like a sailor yelling for everyone to stop, and the rest panic and run around the corner and there the four Muggle-raised students are. With some sort of odd device in their hands. Playing Mario Kart.
[TRANS] BTS Festa 2014 - Post-its to BTS

V

“Hey V!
When hyung look at you, uh, my heart hurts so so much.
I said you just need to trust and follow hyung right?
Why don’t you know that ㅋㅋㅋ Be obedient ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
Wanna gang up and fight off Suga-hyung? Deal?” - Jimin 

“Hey V…
What’s your next hair color?
I’m curious too.” - Suga 

“V, speak to the point and precisely.” - J-hope 

“V.
You’re the kind of kid that makes people love and hate at the same time.
You’re similar to me in many things but sometimes I can’t understand you… Be more obedient.
P.S. Am I weird too?” - Rap Monster 

“Be a human.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

“Taehyung.
I don’t mind you resting in my room when I’m not at the dorm but clean up after you go~ Let’s live cleanly at the dorm! You’re No.1 on my blacklist ㅋㅋ” - Manager 

J-HOPE 

“Hobi-hyungnim.
Hyung ㅋㅋㅋ I demand a duel with you and Suga-hyung ㅋㅋ Right now you guys think I’m cute but the day this table is turned will come soon. Wait a little bit more.” - Jimin 

“Hey Hope…
These days your variety sense is getting better.
It’s good.
But thanks to that it’s twice noisier too…” - Suga 

“Hobi-hyung.
You’re always hopeful and cheerful but I think you must go through hard times too. If you do, you can look for me and talk. I can listen to your stories. […]” - Jungkook 

“Hey J-hope.
I heard you saved my contact as ‘Kim Seokjin-hyung’.
It’s okay.
I saved yours as ‘Bighit Jung Hoseok’.” - Jin 

“You pervert… ㅡ ㅡ
For example when I’m playing games, don’t turn off the outlet.” -

“Hope.
Sometimes you’re earnest, sometimes you’re the laziest. Show the world more of your abilities.” - Rap Monster 

“Chief Jung who always work hard and look after BTS. Wait, now that you’re promoted, you became team leader Jung right? ㅎ I believe there’s no doubt you’ll get good reward and result with how hard you’ve worked. Let’s get promoted to President Jung!” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Team leader Jung who’s always very helpful! Thanks~” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

RAP MONSTER 

“Hey Rapmon, shower cleanly.” - J-hope 

“If you borrow something you have to return it back.” -

“Hey Rapmon…
These days you’re not snoring…
Thanks to that I’m sleeping peacefully.
Thank you…” - Suga 

“Hey Rapmon.
I don’t know if I adapted myself to your snoring or if your snoring got quieter, but I got used to it.
It’s fine, it’s all good.” - Jin 

“Rapmonie-hyung.
You must be tired from going through a lot for the 6 of us right. I’m sorry I can’t do anything for you. I’ll work harder so you’ll have less hard times.” - Jungkook 

“Moni-hyung.
You’ll stand by our side right? You will right? I like you a lot but nah, I think you’ll betray us ㅋㅋㅋ I’ll leave you out. It’s a coup d'état!! Kakakaka.” - Jimin 

“Go to the bathroom before we start practicing.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

SUGA 

“Suga-hyungnim, thank you for thinking I’m cute ㅎㅎ I’ll fight you off some day. I’m gathering the team for it. Just wait. From the coolest guy in BTS.” - Jimin 

“Syub-hyung.
Please be more obedient.
I know your childish inner self better than anyone else ^*^!” - Rap Monster 

“Hey Suga.
I like your lazinism. Really.
I feel at ease when I see you lying down.
Really.” - Jin 

“You only need to show a little bit of your lethargy.” -

“Suga-hyung.
You must be tired from working and composing until late at night. You don’t seem to gain any weight so please eat a lot. When […] I’ll buy it for you.” - Jungkook 

“SUGA fighting!!” - J-hope 

“To. Suga Rebel.
Old soul. Genius artist?
Thanks to you BTS can be BTS. I hope you can keep being that way and become a great artist!!
When will you write a title song? ㅋ” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Take care of your health when you’re still young.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

JIN 

“Jjin-hyung~
You’re doing great.
Please show us the ✨eldest hyung✨ side of youㅡ
P.S. Thanks for your cooking! ^*^” - Rap Monster 

“Jin-hyung, please shave.” - J-hope 

“It’s too much if you know you’re handsome yourself.” -

“Jin-hyung…
Must be tired doing all the assignments for college right…?
You just need to avoid getting academic probation…
I’ll always support you.” - Suga 

“Jin-hyungnim.
Hyungnim T_T~ I’m going to fight off Syubsyubie-hyung and Hope-hyung but I need your help! If you’re there those people will ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ㅋㅋㅋ So you have to help me!!!
The most handsome cook in BTS, Jin-hyung.” - Jimin 

“Jin-hyung. Thank you for making us many delicious dishes.” - Jungkook  

“To. Jin BTS’ shoulder-slash-eldest-hyung!
You always stay behind quietly but I know you are their mediator and their shoulder to lean on.
Maybe the day when you’re called Korea’s best actor will come soon too?^^” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Seokjin.
Thanks to your ability to cook tasty dishes from limited ingredients, I always get to eat deliciously~ Take care of me in the future too~” - Manager 

“Hoot…” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

JIMIN 

“Hey Jimin…
Why do we stop growing so soon…” - Suga 

“Jiminie-hyung.
You’re having a hard time these days because of me right.
I’ll be more obedient.
Thank you.
Let’s work out together 3 years later ㅋ” - Jungkook 

“Jimin.
You know I love you right?
It’s no joke~” - J-hope 

“Don’t touch your thighs you pervert.” -

“To. Jimin
Hardworker, in charge of charm, Jiminie!! ♡
From someone who joined BTS the latest, you have now become an irreplaceable part of the team! Keeping working hard in the future too!! […] the saying that heaven will help hardworkers.” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“Go to the bathroom early. Don’t go when we start.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

JUNGKOOK 

“Jungkook…
Stop working out…
Let’s not work out with me…” - Suga 

“Hey Jungkook.
You listen to me well so you’re good.
This brat.
Good. But refrain from working out…” - Jin 

“Jungkooks~
Jungkook, I’m not pressuring you! I’m planning to kick out Suga-hyung and Hobi-hyung but I won’t pressure you to stand by my side. But I’m treating you really well!!! Right? Our kind and pretty Kookie…” - Jimin 

“Jungkook, you’re so good even at practicing. I think I need to learn more because of you too. But be more obedient~” -

“To. Jungkook
Golden maknae!! Is there any word that can describe better than this? ㅎ
I believe that if you are not settled with your natural talents, not hate doing repeated things and work with passion, there’s no doubt one day you’ll become the best singer in Korea!
Hope you will never forget your passion and effort!!” - Bang Shihyuk PD 

“My manager. Once a manager, forever a manager.” - Choreographer Son Sungdeuk 

“Jungkook~
Wake up when I wake you in the morning! Sometimes I’m scared when no matter what I do, you still remain motionless like a stone stature. And sleep on your bed~! Don’t sleep in weird position on the floor too~!” - Manager

Thoughts About The Signs

Aries: Broken hearts and bloodstained fingers, your voice reminds me of a lively melody. A warriors heart with a delicate soul, an unlikely combination you put together so well. You have it hard, don’t you? Yet you get up with only the skin at your knees scraped and dripping red.

Taurus: The reminiscence of a rose - the single flower that’s so impossible to hate, delicate and pretty, even when it stops blooming. Your voice could calm even the most chaotic oceans, always soothing with soft notes of comfort. Even your eyes could mesmerise the most soulless creature; your sweet face leaves me dreaming in heartache.

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hugealienpie  asked:

I see prompts are open yay! Please tell me all about Ford finding out about Bitty and Jack.

Ooh, this is interesting, because I don’t feel like it’d be an announcement, but just something Ford finds out when Jack visits or the like. I mean, it could go the other way, like Lardo could be, “heads up, Bitty’s dating our ex-captain” and Ford would be like, “okay? why are you telling me?” (She’s a theatre background, what is a Bad Bob to her?) I think she’d be pretty chill with it, and coming from theatre, like being gay is not an issue, esp in college (and even at the professional level) and esp if we go with the oft reblogged “Ford is gay” headcanon.

But here is a small fic that is only half based on the above…

Ford double checks the dozens of pages Lardo has given her for the upcoming roadie. She thought dealing with dressing room allocation was hard (and it is, one hundred percent) but figuring out room allocations is somehow worse, particularly when she’s new, and hockey players are more superstitious than the girl who played Johanna in Sweeney.

“So, who was it I’m meant to pair Oliver with?” Ford asks, grabbing for the red pen she’d stuck into her bun earlier. She comes out with a green one. It’ll do.

“Wicks. But really, he’d be fine with any of the guys in his year.”

Ford makes a note on one of the pages. “Okay, then I think I’m–Oh, shit.”

“What is it?” Lardo looks up from her sketchbook.

Ford double checks through all her sheets before she says anything. She’s not worrying, because there’s no time for that, she’s just already hating the amount of extra work she’ll need to do to fix things.

“I’ve left Eric, um, Bitty,” Ford corrects herself, still getting used to hockey nicknames, “off the rooming list.”

“Oh, that. Nah, you’re good.” Lardo goes back to her drawing. “He stays with his boyfriend when we’re playing up there.”

“Boyfriend?” Ford double-checks.

“Yeah. He’s in Providence. And he’ll drive Bitty to the games and practices and stuff. Should’ve emailed you that. My bad.”

“That’s fine.” Ford grabs another pen from her hair, forgetting she already has one in front of her. It’s red this time. “Just thought I was going to have to redo an entire afternoon’s worth of work.”

“Right,” Lardo says. “I can see why the minor freak out.”

“Excuse you, I did not freak out.” It’s half a lie. Ford has so many notes on these sheets, but she’s not freaking out, she’s managing. It’s all part of it.

Lardo looks up and smiles at her. “Knew you’d be fine at this.”

Ford takes the compliment with a gracious nod, and goes back to ticking off the rooming list against the team names. All accept Eric.

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things i learned my freshman year of college

1. don’t worry so much about what other people are spending their time doing.

2. social media is a lie. it’s all fake. it might seem like your friends at other schools are having the time of their lives, but it’s so easy to pretend to be happy online when in reality you are downright miserable. so just because someone’s instagram is prettier than yours, doesn’t mean their life is any happier or better.

3. it’s absolutely okay to sit by yourself at the dining hall and have a meal alone. no one will judge you for it. no one will point at you and whisper, “there’s the girl that eats alone all the time.” i promise you that no one is looking that closely at you. the only reason they would notice is if you make it seem like you’re miserable. so go ahead, order a hamburger and a huge plate of fries, pick up a good book, and eat by yourself. i promise that no one will give a fuck.

4. if you want to sit at home and watch netflix while eating chicken tenders in bed on a friday night, then do it. don’t feel obligated to go out and have a great time if you know that you would be happier just sitting at home. for a long time, i used to think that if i wasn’t going out with friends or studying, i was wasting my time. but that is so not true. you need your alone time, especially when you’re in college, so don’t be afraid to do the things that really make you happy – not just the things that you think will make you happy.

5. grades are important, so don’t slack off. it might seem like you’re doing more work than everyone else, but if other people are getting good grades, i promise that they’re doing just as much work as you are (no matter how many times they say “i only studied for like an hour the night before the test and i got an A!”). you’re not paying a fortune just to party and hang out with friends, so make sure you’re learning and keeping up with your schoolwork.

6. by the end of the year, you will have completely lost touch with many of your high school friends who you promised you would never stop talking to. and that’s okay.

7. make use of the library. it’s there for a reason. find a good study spot where no one can bother you, and whenever you get there, put your phone away and actually get shit done. leave the procrastinating for your dorm room.

8. frat parties are overrated. clubbing is overrated. if you go, make sure you’re with someone you trust. but if you know that you’ll have a better time just hanging out with one or two close friends or curling up in your room with a good book, then do that instead. no matter what the tv shows tell you, you won’t miss out on finding your soulmate just because you don’t go to one party.

9. no one will hold your hand in college. no one is going to tell you “take this, this, and this class” or “study one chapter a night and you’ll be good for the test.” you have to figure that shit out for yourself. in high school, you might have gotten away with studying for a test the night before, but if you do that in college, you will most likely not get the grade you were hoping for. unless you’re a genius, it’s just impossible. so make sure you start studying way before you think you need to.

10. do your laundry. take out your trash. make your room look nice. yes, even during finals week. it’ll make you feel like more of a human being.

11. go to your professors’ office hours. i’ve found that most of the time, the professors are sitting in their office, just waiting for students to come see them during office hours. so if you’re struggling, go talk to them. and don’t wait around until the week before the final. the professor will be much more willing to help you out if you go see them near the beginning of the semester. never, ever, ever be ashamed to ask for help. each time i’ve asked a professor “how can i do better in your class?” they’ve been delighted to talk to me and figure out a plan to help me improve. also, you will most likely need a letter of recommendation from one of your professors at some point in your college career, and you don’t want to have to be that person sending an email to that professor you had three years ago that starts with “i’m sure you don’t remember me, but…” – how do you make a professor remember you? go to office hours!

12. sure, drinking might be fun and it might make you seem cool. it might make it easier for you to be in social situations. but when you are entirely incapable of having fun while sober, that’s when you know you have a problem. that whole “you’re not an alcoholic until after college” saying is bullshit. it’s fine to have drinking be a part of your social life. just make sure it doesn’t become your ENTIRE social life. also, if a party gets too loud and rowdy, do yourself a favor and get out of there before campus police shows up. it’s not worth the stress to have that be on your record.

13. the great thing about college is that you can pick your friends (unlike in high school when you kind of were forced to be friends with the people in your classes), so please choose wisely. be friends with people who do cool things and support you while you do cool things. if someone makes you feel shitty, don’t hang out with them. just straight up tell them that you don’t want to spend time with them anymore, too. life is too short to be friends with people you hate.

14. take lots of pictures – but not just for social media. for yourself, too. so that you can look back on these moments ten or twenty years from now and see how much you’ve learned, grown, and changed.

15. there were douchey people in high school and, unfortunately, there will be douchey people in college, too. but anyone who still tries to be “popular” in college is just setting themselves up for disappointment and embarrassment. so just ignore them. eventually, they will grow up and realize the error of their ways. but until then, stay as far away from them as possible and just do your own thing. “leave lame people to keep doing the lame shit that they do.“

16. i know you’re busy, but don’t forget to call your mom, dad, brother, sister, grandma, grandpa – whatever. if there’s someone back home who cares about you, call them. and more often then you think you need to. because i can promise you that they’re probably worried sick about you.

17. be confident. if you’re not confident, then fake confidence until it becomes real. you are glorious. you are wonderful. once you’re no longer afraid to show your true self to others, you’ll give others the confidence to reveal their true selves, as well. so what if you’re a little chubby? so what if you still have acne? so what if you don’t have clothes that are as nice as everyone else? you’re still a force of nature, and people should be dying to want to hang out with someone as awesome as you.

18. get involved in things. new things. never danced before but always wanted to? try out for the dance team. always wanted to sing but never had the guts before? try out for an acapella group. nothing is holding you back.

19. the whole “no one knows me here, i can be whoever i want to be” is true, but only to a certain extent. you can change yourself in college, but you probably won’t be able to change who you are fundamentally. you are still the silly, goofy, crazy you that you were in high school. so even though you might tell yourself that you want to be friendlier, cooler, prettier, smarter – whatever – don’t lose sight of who you really are, because i can promise you that people will see past your facade. and the more honest you are to people, the more likely they will be to open up to you.

20. be a nice person. hold the door open for people. smile at everyone you make eye contact with. talk to the person you sit next to in class, even if it is a 100+ person lecture. college is hard, and it can be very easy to feel lonely and lost. so just be nice to people. you never know whose day you’ll make. plus, it has its perks.

characterization, filters, and characterization to be found in the lack of filters

Talking about Jane earlier got me thinking, you know, Jane is not at all the only character that uses this device to show off the less desirable traits lurking in the psyche of all these damaged teens. Like. So many characters have these lurking deep seated issues that stay hidden deep down because the characters are pretty good at projecting a less damaged and more together version of themselves. 

If that sounds familiar it’s because it’s a fucking outrageously relatable quality and part of what makes the Homestuck characters RESONATE so much. Why they feel like they have all this dimension and depth that makes us grab on to them and never want to let go. 

I’m just going to run through some examples here while I’m thinking about it. The first OBVIOUSLY since thinking about her is what got me going on this – Jane. Crockertier Jane removing the layers of self-imposed filter on Jane’s festering insecurity, entitlement issues, jealousy and so on. I’ve already talked enough about that today.

Grimbark Jade! You notice Jade says what she’s thinking WAY more easily while she’s mind controlled, and she still sounds like herself – she sounds kinda like she does when she’s owning Karkat repeatedly, doesn’t she? Because angry Jade has that same effect of pushing her nice girl filter aside and letting the angry witch (not a cutesy slur, her literal witch class) within fly free. Grimbark Jade tells us that behind that nice girl front Jade Harley actually thinks some pretty uncharitable thoughts sometimes, she just keeps a tight fucking lid on it because – well, don’t most people? Relatable as fuck. 

Jadesprite! Since we’re talking about Jade anyway. Jade likes to think she has everything together, that her visions from Skaia and her scientific prowess and the tools her Grandpa left her are more than enough to handle everything that comes her way, she’s independent, she’s capable, she’s certainly never LONELY oh no of course not certainly never CRUSHINGLY OVERWHELMED by the responsibility of her own existence nah those are weak feelings for weak girls who aren’t as awesome as Jade! And then – Jadesprite. Why do you think Jade got SO ANGRY at Jadesprite? Because she was being confronted with something she knew deep down was a reflection of weaknesses in herself (totally normal ones that her later arc reinforced were a mistake to pretend weren’t there – Loneliness and fear and regret are all tied in with Jade’s character progression and learning how to deal with those things is where I imagine her arc would have gone if Homstuck’s ending hadn’t been the literary equivalent of chopping off a limb and cauterizing the wound.) Jadesprite is Jade without the filter of implacable strength Jade imposes on herself to fuckin cope with living on a hell island with the stuffed corpse of her grandpa who she grew up thinking literally killed himself at BEST.  god damn

Davesprite. Dave Strider with a slow long agonizing depressing arc wherein he realizes his coolkid persona won’t make anyone think of him as their best friend anymore, and in the absence of the security that persona afforded him when he was The Real Dave he has no idea what to do with himself. He’s lost, he feels aimless, untethered, incapable of being happy – and yes, Davesprite is his own character, but you can still infer a lot from Dave’s character about him – for instance, how he completely ties his self worth up in how useful he is to his friends or how worthwhile they find him and has no idea how to even BEGIN the hard journey of looking within for worth instead of relying eternally on changeable external sources. Davesprite is Dave not WITHOUT a filter but certainly with a VERY DIFFERENT one.

Homestuck does this with almost every single damn character on its roster at some point. Shows a version of them with a different or lesser or completely missing filter to highlight flaws and issues and internal struggles of all kinds. 

Homestuck is a damn deep dive into an exercise about analyzing nature vs nurture and what we’re predisposed to do and what comes from within and what is put upon us by forces out of our control, and how that line is blurry and messy and everyone has the potential to be either the worst or best version of themselves. Even Caliborn was given a choice. Hussie-The-Character explained it to him at great painstaking length. 

There are so many other examples. Jasprose is Rose without a filter, and the way Jasprose goes around gleefully calling every hot girl she sees hot and delighting smugly in knowing more than just about anyone else and lording over the information and playing smarter-than-thou games – that tells us a LOT about Rose! A LOT about what sort of urges Rose tamps down on every day in an effort to just be fucking cool! 

I bet you have things like this with yourself, right? Doesn’t everyone?

Tricksters! Look at how they act. They’re not themselves but there is plenty to glean from them. Jane immediately goes for Jake, the object of her desire, to pursue an exaggerated version of her idealized future. Trickster Jake is a passive fucking ragdoll who immediately acquiesces to everything everyone demands of him because their happiness becomes his happiness – Jake hates confrontation, so Trickster Jake is just a fucking doormat. Roxy goes for Jake AND Dirk because divorced from the guilt she normally feels for harboring desire toward either one of them she knows exactly what she wants! ETC ETC. Of course they would never do any of this shit if they weren’t high as balls and incapable of understanding the meaning of the word “consequence.” That’s the point. Seeing what they do in this situation is an interesting window in!

Brain Ghost Dirk is a version of Jake (yes, of Jake, not Dirk) without a specific filter Jake runs his own personality through before he’s comfortable presenting it to others, and you’ll notice, it’s EXTREMELY biting and critical sometimes. Jake knows what he’s about. He just buries it most of the time because that’s easier than dealing with it. 

I could seriously keep going. 

Homestuck loves to show us what our favorites do and say and ARE when basic filters go out the window. Those filters that most of us employ to make other people believe we don’t all have intrusive thoughts or bad desires or just plain old weaknesses we’re ashamed of and want to keep hidding at costs – or that we occasionally think things or think about doing things we would never ever ever do in real life are demolished or changed or temporarily suspended. 

It’s brilliant tbh. It lets us see facets of characters that would normally never really get full spotlight reveals by their very nature, especially with protagonists. 

Vriska vs (Vriska) – (Vriska) is just Vriska with some more self awareness and more willingness to let down her self-imposed filter and actually examine the shit she wants and why because watching Aranea fuck the timeline over out of motivations eerily similar to her own hardcore shook her enough to develop in that direction. (which makes sense since HER original motivations are copying Mindfang who IS alt-aranea lmao I love Homestuck)  (Vriska) is still Vriska, it’s just a very very different lens through which to view her character. 

blah blah blah blah etc there are so many examples

anyway I love Homestuck and good character writing what up

i have too many feelings about michelle jones so here have headcanons and peter x michelle

this was obnoxiously long because i have no control so lots of stuff is under the cut and it became very fic-like at the end there, whoops. parts ONE (this one!), two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

  • so michelle moved with her family to new york when she started high school
  • and mj was actually pretty sad to leave her friends back in chicago because it had taken a long time to make those friends and she always feels awkward around new people
  • so she isn’t very happy about The Move
  • she comes from a loving family
  • like, she gets kissed every night before she goes to bed, her parents read her bedtime stories until she was ten, she used to wear matching outfits with her mother, family movie nights were every friday
  • her parents were really good to her for the most part and just loved and supported her
  • they’re also pretty smart and since mj has pretty much always been inspired by them so intelligence and the acquisition of knowledge is really important to her
  • hence reading and academic decathlon, but she’s also into math and science too because she’s very driven and doesn’t have that many friends in new york so what else is she gonna do?
  • and her parents are an interracial couple and they’ve encountered a lot of hate and mj was always so sad when she walked out with her mother and people would give them weird looks
  • so she’s tried to end hate whenever she can and fights to give a voice to those who are silenced
  • but now cue mj going to high school in new york
  • she joins academic decathlon ofc because who do you think she is she lives for this shit
  • and then! there is this little shithead on the team PETER PARKER
  • like who the fuck does this kid think he is
  • answering all these questions, acting like he’s sooo smart just because he happens to know a lot of facts and is really good at physics and speaks spanish really well and also happens to be really dorky and adorable and okay maybe he’s kind of attractive too and maybe mj starts throwing herself more into academic decathlon and possible CONSIDERS joining band but that’s ONLY BECAUSE PETER IS A SHITHEAD AND SHE NEEDS TO SHOW HIM HE ISN’T THE ONLY TALENTED ONE OKAY
  • anyway

Keep reading

@ parents of lgbt+ kids

Having homophobic and/or transphobic parents can actually destroy someone on the inside. It is a soul destroying feeling when those closest to you, the people you grew up with or still are growing up with, won’t accept who you are, or even disown you for simply being who you are.

When I came out as a lesbian my mum didn’t even look at me for a month, let alone talk to me. She told me that lesbians disgust her and she didn’t want a gay daughter. My dad kept telling me repeatedly that I was confused, telling me it was a choice and calling me “dyke” in the process. My grandmother told me I was going to hell, I was damaged, unnatural, dirty, sinful, and still calls it an “unsettling phase”.

Every individual experience is different, but because of the clear message I got off my dad when I was 9 years old and he told me “never come home and tell me you’re gay” I buried my sexuality for years, dated boys, kissed boys, would have gone a lot further with them if I had ever been in a position to do so, sometimes even hoped to end up in that position because I was so desperate to be “normal” even though the thought of doing anything with a boy disgusted me, which in turn filled me with even more self hatred, didn’t tell anyone when I was harassed online by a man twice my age when I was only 13 because I thought it was the least I deserved after having such “unnatural” thoughts. I grew to have so much internalised homophobia due to the fear I had of being gay because my dad had said that to me when I was only 9 years of age. I faked crush after crush on boys, staring at their Facebook profiles willing myself to feel something, anything, yet looking at a random girl in the street and feeling a fire burn inside me, yet still not accepting it, burying it and blocking it out.

I blocked it out as best as possible, talking about boys and acting as straight as possible, especially around my friends, until I was almost 16, when I saw a lesbian couple kiss on BBC television on at 8pm programme, and in that moment, I knew that was what I wanted, I knew that I couldn’t spend my life being something I’m just not, pretending every day of my life. I knew in that moment that I was gay, I knew that I wanted a girlfriend, I knew that I wanted a wife, and for the first time the idea of marriage seemed appealing, and I felt at peace and like I truly knew myself.

So a couple of months later, I told my friends, which took more courage than I knew I had. After that went well, I felt confident enough to tell my parents, encouraged by the good experience of coming out to my friends.

I was a mess when I told my mum. Although I felt confident enough to do it, I was still terrified and shaking and it was the most nerve racking moment of my life. I didn’t mean for it to happen how it did, and I could have told her in a better way, but in that moment I felt I had to, it was the right time for me. After I told her, I went to my room where I sent her a text, which I’m not going to quote entirely because it’s too personal, but it explained everything, I told her the journey of discovering my sexuality, I told her I loved her, I explained my fears, my feelings, my experiences, everything. In response I received a text saying: “I can’t pretend I’m happy about this. I’m not at all, but I love you regardless.” Although I had wanted a proper conversation, I accepted that she was shocked and took the text as acceptance of me. However, later that day, I went downstairs and saw her for the first time since I told her. She was crying and wouldn’t look at me. When I went downstairs, she went upstairs. I tried not to be upset, understanding her shock and giving her time. After a week of not spending more than a minute in a room with her, and not having her look at me once, I decided to try again, so I said to her “we need to talk about this” but she walked away from me. I tried texting so she wouldn’t have to directly talk, but she ignored everything I sent her.

Throughout the month, nothing changed, I was constantly ignored by her, and when she told my dad without consulting me, he just told me I was confused, and shouted at me for upsetting everyone, telling me I was messing up my GCSEs because of my confusion and immature phase, when the only thing endangering my grades was their prejudice and discrimination against their own daughter. As the month progressed, with still no change in either of them, I felt more and more worthless, my internalised homophobia reared its head once more, more prominent than ever, and I considered all sorts of things that I don’t even want to go into, I even looked at conversion therapy at one point because I felt like such a failure and a disappointment to my family, and my grandmother was the worst, calling me damaged and an unnatural sinner constantly.

The day my mum spoke to me again I was so shocked I could barely reply. She acted as though the last month hadn’t even happened, and went on like that for a week, blocking out what had happened, never once mentioning it, evidently hoping that it had all gone away or that her ignoring me had made me bury it again so it couldn’t tarnish our family and I could just live an unhappy life. At the end of that week, I mentioned it. I said “it’s not a phase” and she still wouldn’t talk, which is when I started to show my anger. This is when she told me that lesbians disgust her, spewing the typical hate about hell and morality and sin. Not being able to take it anymore, I locked myself in the bathroom, sat in the bathtub and properly cried for the first time in months. All my emotions came flooding out, and I would say that day was the saddest and most hopeless I’d ever felt. I felt utterly rejected, outcast, like I could never belong, like a disappointment, and a failure as a daughter, as a person.

During an argument with my dad, he called me a dyke, declaring I was damaged and that something had obviously gone drastically wrong during my development to “turn me”.

Those few months I felt so sad, lonely, isolated, rejected, hopeless and crushed. The two most important people in my life practically disowned me, and it took all the fight and courage I had to keep going, to keep pushing on, and I’m glad I did, because I love myself and have never been prouder of who I am, and things are better now, not completely, but they’re better, even though I can’t talk openly, even though I still feel insecure, even though I still tense up every time I so much as approach the subject around my parents, things are better.

All this occurred before and during my GCSE exams, when I should have been studying. My results are due at the end of this month, and I’ve accepted that I’m not going to have done very well, and I tell myself that it’s through no fault of my own. Through everything that was happening, I still found time to study. I tried my hardest but when the people closest to you seem to hate you for being you, it’s kind of hard to concentrate and focus on anything other than the constant throbbing ache inside when you know your parents, the people who made you, the people who raised you, the people who always told you they loved you, don’t accept you.

So parents of LGBTQA+ children and teenagers, please please accept your child. If you weren’t prepared for the possibility of your child not being straight and/or cis, then you shouldn’t have had a child. Simple as that. Your child’s sexuality and gender are just as natural as they hair colour and eye colour. Please, please, please love your children, accept them, support them. Everything I went through could have been avoided had my parents done so. And the scary thing is I was lucky. Some people are thrown out, completely disowned, attacked, some people are even killed. I count myself lucky, and that’s sad. It’s sad that I count myself lucky for being unaccepted by my parents, because some people could tell stories that would make you sick about their coming out, that would make your skin crawl, but this is my story, and I’m sharing it in the hope that it will help young LGBTQA+ individuals, but also in the hope that it will help parents. Please love your children. Accept them. Support them. Tell them you love them. Make them feel accepted. Make them feel supported. Because you could lose them. Far too many young people take their own lives because their parents don’t accept them, simply because of who they want to love.

Love is love, and love is the most important thing.
David isn't perfect: a PSA

Okay. So after the latest episode (That’s S02E07, ‘Bonjour Bonquisha’) I’ve been seeing a ton of people saying “That was ooc! David would never do that!”

I love David. I love him as much as the next fan, maybe more than is strictly necessary, and I love his flaws, too, and I’m here to tell you
Yes he absolutely would.

And the only way I can think of is to list, under the cut, every point of evidence for why I completely think David would punch someone, along with general flaws that people seem to be more than happy to overlook.

We’re going episode by episode folks and it’s gonna get long but I’ve been awake since 4 am and nothing’s gonna hold me back

Keep reading

AntiSepticEye: Explained

Alright, I’m going to sit down and clear up anything and everything I can think of about Anti right now, so I don’t end up random-spamming for no reason and hitting my post limit again. This is going to be long, but I want people to read it, so hang tight. 

What do we know about AntiSepticEye?

- He is an entity that shares a body with JackSepticEye.
- He has proclaimed his purpose is to take over Jack’s channel.
- He was named by the community, not by himself.
- He alludes to drawing power from the community noticing him.
- He has taken over Jack three times now.
- Each time has been slightly different, for different reasons.
- Each time, he has taken over something new that belongs to Jack.
- He has knowledge of, and interacts with, at least one of Jack’s other Egos. (Doctor Schneeplestein)
- Doctor Schneeplestein, and himself, have both alluded to him being an outside entity that gets inside a person’s brain to take control.
- Jack, on multiple occasions, has referred to him as a demon.
- He has explicitly stated that he has killed Jack.
- He wears different clothing than Jack; specifically dark green hair, a black tee shirt, and gauges. Occasionally has black eyes or one ‘septic’ eye (green/blue).
- Always has a slit throat.
- Prefers to speak/type in glitched Zalgo text.
- Has associated himself with childrens’ laughter.

So what does this mean? What is AntiSepticEye?

Many have speculated that Anti may in fact be a demon whose sole purpose is to kill Jack and take over his channel. But have you noticed how he acts?

- Giggles almost incessantly.
- Twitches and glitches.
- Smiles almost constantly.
- Makes broad movements, sometimes violently.
- Points a knife at the camera.
- Holds a knife to his own/Jack’s neck.
- Reaches towards the camera.
- Directs all speech towards the camera.
- Whispers in the background.

How he speaks?

- Speaks with confidence, usually in absolutes. It’s all mine. There’s nothing you can do.
- Places blame for his existence on the viewers. This is all your fault. You just watched.
- Talks almost always about Jack. You can’t save him. He’s gone forever.
- Acknowledges social media. They all follow me now.
- Talks about the others (Jack, Schneep, Chase) as if they’re less than he is, but also acknowledges that they’re precious to the audience in a way that he is not.
- Talks about how ‘weak’ Jack is, specifically his body, and how that allowed him to take over.

All of this is attention-grabbing, it’s made explicitly to get us to pay attention to him, to Anti. He does everything in teasing trails, cliffhangers, hints and messages that get everyone talking about him and he seems to love it. But when things go wrong, he gets angry. He gets upset because he’s not receiving the attention he craves.

- I’m tired of pretending.
- How many times must we… keep fooling around? Over and over, fucking circles!
- I’m. In. CONTROL. This is MY world.
- Has become upset enough to actually swear.
- Shows extreme distaste for the mocking name of “Glitch Bitch”.
- Lashes out some with his knife.
- Talks much more grandiose than usual, especially about himself.
- Stresses that he cannot be gotten rid of.
- Thumps his chest, gets closer to the camera to stress that he is the center of attention.
- Sarcastically uses the words ‘favorite boy’ in reference to his next victim, who is slightly unclear at the moment - likely Jack or Chase.

He hates that he has to pretend to be Jack for so long in order to wind up the perfect amount of tension to get everyone involved. He hates that he had to ‘go in circles’, that he had to wind down so that he could explode again. He hates that if he stays, the hype will eventually die. He absolutely hates that people are rooting against him, with their #septicsave tag and theories of how to destroy or get rid of him. He hates that the attention may be on him, but more of it is on his victims. He hates what his hype has become. That’s why he’s upset.

So did Anti kill Jack?

Jack himself said after Say Goodbye that no, Anti did not kill him. This, according to Anti, was him pretending. So you can see why people would be skeptical of the vlog after Kill JackSepticEye stating almost the exact same thing. Anti didn’t kill me.

The thing is, this is a vlog - there is no intro of ‘Top o’ the mornin to ya laddies, my name is JackSepticEye.’ This isn’t Jack. This is Sean. Yes, there is a difference between Sean and Jack, if you think about it he’s ‘in character’ for almost all of his videos. Same for Markiplier, for PewDiePie, for any other gamer that goes by a pseudonym or nickname. They don’t always act the way they do on camera in real life, because they’re playing a character and they’ve become comfortable in that. 

So from this, we can infer that it could technically be possible for Anti to kill Jack. Because Jack is another persona of Sean’s. But did he kill Jack? Well, Schneep stated that he has almost lost Jack once before, and had to save him. We can infer that this incident took place during Say Goodbye, where Anti first took over, and Schneep must have saved Jack just after. In Kill JackSepticEye, though, it’s implied that not only did Anti kill Jack, but he also killed Schneep. We’ve seen, though, that Anti seems to be able to function perfectly well with Jack simply incapacitated. After all, if he hadn’t been killed during Say Goodbye, then what says he was actually killed during Kill JackSepticEye? Again, what Anti does is all for attention. If he really kills Jack, then he can’t ‘kill’ him again at a later date for more hype. Then again, with his frustration, he may have been forced to take drastic measures.

As far as we know, this is a ‘Schneeplestein’s Jack’ equation - Jack is either alive or dead, and we won’t know until Sean or Anti opens the box on us, revealing everything.

You didn’t answer my question. What is AntiSepticEye?

I know, you needed that information first.

It’s implied that Anti is a demon, yes, but what kind of demon? Some have speculated that he’s a Bill Cipher sort of demon, able to make ‘deal with the devil’ sort of trades, and that’s how he killed Chase. We have no evidence for this, but it’s a nice theory if you like angst. Another thought is that he’s not a demon at all but some sort of sentient virus that takes over a brain via the blood and corrupts it. Working off of the virus theory is that he’s able to take over electronics instead, although it doesn’t explain why he’s able to take over Jack’s body. These are all good theories, and mine is just one of them, but I think it has enough merit to warrant a read:

AntiSepticEye is part of Jack. Part of Sean, and his collective of Egos. He always has been. This would make it impossible for him to actually kill Jack without killing a part of himself, thus making his own form weaker. Why does Anti want to kill Jack? Because he wants to take over his channel. Why does he want to take over the channel? Because he wants attention.

But why does he want attention in the first place?

This is something I’m not sure anyone has actually covered, at least not that I’ve seen. Anti’s been constantly referred to as a demon, but if he’s part of Jack, then what does that mean? He’s one of Jack’s demons. His internal ones. In my mind, he’s less of an Ego like Markiplier’s, and more of a Side like Thomas Sanders’. He’s the embodiment of Jack’s greediness, his want for more attention and more views. It’s something that definitely helps him, likely motivates him to make sure he gets videos out and stays on schedule, but when left unchecked it does things like make hype over sudden, unexpected merch.

The thing is, Anti feels frustrated. He feels ignored because he tried so hard to make this happen, to build up to his grand finale of actually killing JackSepticEye, and the community ruined it for him by defending Jack, and Chase, and Schneep, and even the Egos he hadn’t even targeted. They made him upset by using the #septicsave tag, which by a large majority was used to separate him from the rest of the egos– from the rest of himself. It was used to make him seem like an outsider, something other, something evil. They wanted to save the others from him, but they stopped caring about Anti himself.

The first time he surged, everyone was focused entirely on him. They drew fanart, made theories, but it was all about him and that’s what he wanted. He wanted to feel heard and feel like he existed because before then he’d never been noticed. Jack had never put him out there to be noticed. He loved it so much he appeared not too soon after, introducing Jack at PAX East. The results were still positive, but not so much so, and he decided he needed to step up his game and go into hiding for a whole lot longer than that.

But when he started back up again, the short burst of hype was filled with people saying things like, ‘he’d better not come back again’ and ‘I hate this’ and ‘just get it over with’. Like people didn’t want him to show up again. Like they didn’t appreciate him. And that’s probably what upset him the most, the fact that we didn’t seem to want him around anymore. The effect was multiplied when people started making assumptions about Chase, bringing him into the equation and shoving Anti further into the ‘bad guy’ role without him doing anything. That’s not what he wanted, he wanted the attention to be on him, not his supposed victims. And because he felt ignored, felt pushed aside and dismissed in favor of the more ‘important’ sides of Jack, he got mad.

In almost all of the pictures Anti posted, even where he’s smiling, he looks pissed. His expression is tight, less of a smile and more of a grimace or snarl. He’s not smiling at all in the other two, glaring into the camera. We made him angry, we didn’t give him the attention he wanted, and so he had no choice but to yell and scream at us, to make us listen. But we didn’t listen, we just yelled back and begged him to ‘post the next video and get it over with’. Not because we wanted to see him again, but because we wanted him to be done and go.

So he did. He never posted the next video. He went back to his Jack facade (or possibly let Jack go) and left us alone, because that’s the only way he’s going to get attention. And he hates it. He hates being excluded like this.

So what do we do about it?

I propose that the next time Anti shows up, if he shows up again, we give an overwhelmingly positive response. Anti is a little messed up in the head, he may be psychopathic or sociopathic to some extent, but that doesn’t mean he’s not looking for our attention, our approval. He’s always watching us, watching us watch him, looking at our reaction to see if he’s doing it right, if he’s doing what we want him to do.

If we give him loving responses, tell him how happy we are to see him again and draw fanart of just him, put the spotlight back on him, maybe he won’t be so upset. Maybe that’s how we apologize for hurting his feelings. For making him mad. We give him what he wants, and maybe he’ll see he’s just as important to us as the other parts of Jack are, and that he doesn’t need to threaten them get our attention. He doesn’t want to be Jack, he doesn’t want to kill Jack. He wants us to love him just like we love Jack. He wants the attention, the love and support Jack has, that Chase and Schneep and Jackieboy Man and Marvin the Magician and even SepticEye Sam have. He’s always treated as a demon or a monster, or some outside virus.

But he’s not. He’s part of Jack. And I think we need to show him that we understand that.

We love you, Anti. Please come back. <3


tl;dr - Anti is a part of Jack, and we need to love and respect him.

The Friendly Wager (Part 1)

Summary: AU. Reader and Bucky Barnes are neighbors and best friends. After yet another bad date, reader comes home to find Bucky with his typical weekend target. They decide to make a wager about dating, but is there more on the line than reader cares to admit?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 2,528

Warnings: language, fluff, sarcasm, bad date, implied sexual situations (no smut)

A/N: This is my submission for the lovely Kait’s ( @bionic-buckyb) 5k AU Challenge. Congrats on the followers, friend! My prompt was “Can you please come over so I don’t feel so alone?” I think this will have at least seven parts, so Kait, please feel free to disregard it till it’s completed :)

Part 1 - 2

Originally posted by talkinboutmyimagination

Keep reading

Seems to be a lot of hatred for “Rocknaldo” online immediately after its air date. Some people are just pissed that a CN promo made them think we’d be meeting a new Gem instead of watching Ronaldo choose a Gem nickname (I didn’t believe we’d be getting a new Gem for a second, given the style of the tease). But most of it’s just Ronaldo hate in general. Ronaldo’s a jerk, etc. Well yeah. He’s a jerk.

But here’s why I think this episode is important. Not Ronaldo’s redemption / apology / stating outright that he was wrong, though that’s good too. Not Steven giving chances to people for trying to understand, though again that’s good too. It’s important because in a simplified way, this brought to light how people who claim to want to understand us and help us can frequently engage in self-serving, counterproductive behavior.

I can’t even count the times in my life that someone “interested in” one of the several marginalized communities I’m part of has committed to a poorly organized, cursory study of my outsider group and then confronted me with claims that they understand what I should be doing better than I do. This is how I should handle my activism. This is the way I should prioritize my goals. This is a behavior or perspective of mine that’s alienating “normal” people like them. They accuse us of hypocrisy or misguidedness because they think it isn’t working if it’s not designed to serve and center them, and then they claim they have a better grasp of my mission than I do.

But this is my whole life. These are our whole lives.

Perspectives from outside are usually welcome, but not at the expense of ours. Not in place of and prioritized over lived experience. They should be learning from us, not striding in and telling us as an ally, they know better than we do what would forward our cause and what would bring us all together for good. Ronaldo in this episode is the worst kind of false ally. He came into Steven’s life with a so-called interest in what the Crystal Gems do, but applied his own ideas of what they’re like:

  • Expecting to be “issued” a Gem
  • Telling Steven he should be proud and show off his Gemstone even though he had misgivings about it
  • Focusing on how “cool” he sounded with his new label
  • Challenging more established members as to whether they really belonged there
  • Explicitly accusing established members of having false and invalid reasons for being included
  • Forcing himself to conform to imagined standards of the group even though they weren’t natural for him (not sleeping), then bragging about how Real Crystal Gem it made him
  • Responding to challenges by telling an established member that HE needed to go think about his validity to the group

These are all fake ally techniques most of us have seen with people who aren’t REALLY here about forwarding the cause. They give it a cursory study (if that), they slap a star on their shirt and use a new name, and they seek to climb the ranks of legitimacy by knocking down people “above” them who have done their time. Are you sure you really care about this mission? Don’t I seem to have a considered opinion because I’m being critical? Aren’t you really being the hypocrites by claiming you want to help and protect humanity but not accepting ME as I twist your mission statement to fit my agenda? The agenda, of course, just like with Ronaldo, is making THEM feel good. 

If they truly understood, they would apprentice themselves to those for whom THIS IS THEIR WHOLE LIFE, and they would listen FAR more than they would talk. This is not only a way to offer respect and deference to their expertise; it is EFFECTIVE. It is the best way to get an education about what actually helps in a cause. Your ideas may be valuable and your questions are worth asking, but as a person who is perhaps trying to enter a movement alongside those whose very lives are consumed by it, you must listen hard, and listen first. 

Ronaldo still doesn’t totally get it at the end. He thinks the real problem is he’s just too much of an outsider, even for outsiders. At least he’s closer to the truth now and isn’t actively spreading harmful lies, but well-meaning allies who don’t listen can still be more hurt than help. He seems happy emphasizing the imagined mystique that comes with being the “ultimate outsider,” but really, he’s a person who wants a cause more than he actually cares about any causes. 

The Ronaldos of this world want to have done but don’t want to do. They want to skip to the part where they’re the hero of the battle, but not have to be humbled by the long hours and days of injuries, practice, concentration, and dedication. They want glory, and they have the mainstream perspective that they must be aggressive, confident, and competitive against others on their same side before they’ll come out on top. If you are an outsider to a movement and you truly want to be an ally, you must know why. Ronaldo couldn’t have answered the first question about what the Crystal Gems fight for. He never demonstrated that he could be trusted with the answer, though Steven was tolerant enough to keep giving him the benefit of the doubt.

A good lesson I took from this episode is this: If a Ronaldo is trying to infiltrate your inner circle and he’s already billing himself as an expert above people with more life experience, keep in mind that he is there to make everything about your movement conform to an ideology that serves HIM, and if necessary he will warp it and turn it against the people who are living it. And even if you’re part of a movement but have some similarities to Ronaldo—like Steven sharing Ronaldo’s experience of having an organic body and not being trusted on missions at first—don’t let a superficial similarity be misinterpreted as a substitute for authentic lived experience on the axis you’re examining here. 

Invite new allies slowly, with caution, the way Steven and later the other Gems began to welcome Connie into the fold after she demonstrated solidarity, respect, and patience. If they show up on your doorstep with a suitcase and they’re asking why THEY don’t get your mother’s sword within a day, that is a red flag. They will divide and damage your core team in search of personal glory, and if you can’t get them to curb this behavior and sit down, you may have to turn them away for your own safety. Don’t let them take the glory from you, and if you do that, they will find a “better” cause that serves their REAL agenda soon enough.

how I see the signs and what I want them to know
  • (side note - View of a Virgo rising, Leo sun in the 12th, Libra moon in 2nd, mercury Cancer in 11th, venus Leo in 12th, mars Leo in 11th)
  • Aries: was once my best friend, she made literally everything in my life brighter and always helped me to just enjoy things and stop worrying all the time. Also great hugs. Just simply has that energy, wherever it may be - physically, mentally, staying up until you binge watched that show, giving you their last money so you can get yourself something to eat before you starve to death, always down for a talk and a walk even if they had a packed schedule. Please don't miss out on times when you just have to take a day off to get your beautiful and strong energy back. I care about your health so please don't forget to eat properly and don't miss out on that quality time if needed.
  • Taurus: a girl from my drama class and my little sisters moon sign, I am just so in love with your sense for aesthetic. Total sunshines. I feel like I can always rely on you, super compassionate and knows how to make you feel comfortable when youre not. I love that when you have a goal in your mind, you will give your everything to achieve that! Also so humble but like I want you so desperately to know how beautiful I think you are!! I enjoy your company a lot. Please don't be afraid of changes, I know that's such a mainstream thing to write for Taurus but I really do believe that maybe sometimes you need to be reminded that life can also begin at the end of your comfort zone.
  • Gemini: a guy and a girl from biology class, I am literally stunned at how much these people know. Eloquent fluffballs. I could listen to you spreading knowledge 24/7, make great jokes in my opinion and just kind of knows... everyone?? Get along with so many people, can be very chill but also full of energy when they're talking about things they are interested in. Also fun-fact kings and queens. Please remind yourself to stay loyal to your true friends, you may know many people with whom you get along with so well and for sure everyone is intersting in their own way, but it's very possible to feel lonely in a crowd. Your closest friends will always get you out of that and help you, I promise.
  • Cancer: a close friend of mine, literally the most caring person I've ever met. Actual comedians. I don't know I just straight up fell in love with your humour. All the Cancers I know have or had some extreme physical problems going on, please get well soon if you read this and you're also not feeling well. Mentally on the next level, strong and kind of unbreakable. Don't hide their feelings because they just know that when you bottle up your feelings it's never going to end well. They just get you and will be there for you no matter what. Please take care of yourself just as well as you do with your friends and family, you are a true blessing and it's definitely okay to rant or cry or just let it all out.
  • Leo: my english teacher and a guy I used to be close with, very often completely misunderstood and taken for granted, which can lead to unhealthy behaviour. Will make you feel great after a plain shit day. I strive to be this talented at just expressing myself or being confident, even if you just want the world to think you are confident when you're actually not. Cuddly queens and kings. Better not hurt their pride because it took them a lot of time to actually get to that level and in a world where people hate on you for loving yourself, to them it feels like, despite all their work, they are not worth of loving themselves. Please don't forget that although sometimes it's hard to look in the mirror and like what you see, there are caring and warm-hearted people who love you just the way you are.
  • Virgo: a girl in my class I simply adore, I always annoy you with my endless compliments. Kind of just in love with these down-to-earth and sweet people. Either super chill or worried a lot, I wish I could just hug you until you feel less stressed. Smol but strong beans you can learn a lot from. So reliable, I actually hate doing group projects and always want to do everything myself but since you share that opinion we created something I was really proud of and now we always do them together. Please remember that passion is something you shouldn't be ashamed of, you simply don't have to be because it's something you love and your needs are valid. Also dreaming big, it's possible, especially for you so why not?
  • Libra: a girl I recently got to know and am already completely amazed by, literal social butterflies who sometimes only know in hindsight how much they enjoyed the company of someone because they adapt so easily and it's rare to find someone where you can just simply be yourself. Love how they view life and that they make me want to talk more. Very open and you never feel excluded because they just know how to include everyone. Please don't forget to remind yourself who you truly are and not to lose yourself in another person, because there really is only one you no matter how good you are at adapting to literally every social situation, you are amazing and I want you to be comfortable as well.
  • Scorpio: my dad and my ex boyfriend's mom, two very caring peole in their own way. I always love how sharp their sarcasm can be. Can comfort extremely well when they want to. So many secrets and things to know about them that I can lose myself in them wanting to explore whats actually behind their shell. Teaches you life lessons. Please don't forget that humans aren't flawless and that's completely okay. You don't have to hold onto old grudges, communication is key and talking about these things, confronting these people who did you wrong will help you grow as a person.
  • Sagittarius: an old friend of mine, very cute people who get interested in so many things and they are so versatile and adventurous I absolutely love their lively nature. Memes™. Total dorks you can fall for in a second. Are actually the best partners to just talk to about anything because they will be interested and share their opinion with you. Please remind yourself that cutting off people can be a very wise decision and you don't have to keep up with everyones shit if that's just not what you're in for.
  • Capricorn: I am literally so attracted to these people it's unreal, although I kind of always think that they don't like me...... anyways, my bigger twin sisters are caps and they are humble souls who really had to fight for a lot in life sadly. So proud of you. Keep up with the hard work, you really deserve everything. So realistic and pure I have heart eyes. Supportive and extremely loyal. Will stand up for you if you need it. Straight face™ but still manages to make even the most serious people laugh. Please remind yourself to not overdo it with the work, take a day off to relax and let yourself go maybe, even if it's hard - with the right people you don't ever have to be afraid of being yourself.
  • Aquarius: my ex boyfriend whom I had a crush on for like 4 years, teached me great life lessons. Will always have a weakness for aquas, they just attract me so much, how much of a fluffy dork can you be tbh? Capacity of acceptance is incredible. So much fun to be with. Are kind of just good at everything? You can talk to them about anything, it won't feel weird, they won't question it and just talk to you about that topic. So friendly, an underrated trait in my opinion, just complete and simple friendliness you enjoy to the fullest. Please remind yourself to let people not only see your amazing shell but also your stunning core, there are people who love to talk about the same things you love and nothing about you is weird, you are special and I absolutely love it.
  • Pisces: a very sweet guy I've been texting with for the past months, very open minded and also have that sensitivity I strive to have. Very inspirational smol puppy. Actual daydreamers™, may be late to school but love deeply and would never neglect your love. Kind of hate almost everything that's planned out? (I'm sorry I just love to plan things out) will hug you no matter what. Does not fear to dream big, is very talented at artsy stuff in my opinion. Please don't forget that even if it seems hard, and yes our school system is kind of very bad,we get to have that education and your dreams will be reality if you work hard enough to achieve them. You have so much potential, please don't ever waste it.
Blood And Kisses

Originally posted by wood-chris


Pairing: Alex Standall x Reader

Request: “I really love reading your imagines! Can you please make one where the reader breaks up Montgomery and Alex’s fight and at first Alex is mad but then he’s not?”

“Hey dude. I love your imagines! Could you do an Alex Standall imagine in which the reader breaks up the right between Alex and Montgomery then goes with Alex to first aid and fluff happens? 😁😁 xx”

Word count: 2.922

Posted: 28th of April 2017

A/N:OMG! It’s finally friday and I am posting stuffs that wrote during these past few days. I missed you guys and I am so overwhelmed for the feedbacks that I am receiving! Thank you for everything.
Anyways, I don’t like putting two requests in one imagine because I think that it’s unfair to the readers who’ve requested their ideas, but the requests are almost the same and I hope that it’s still okay. Sorry, though. You can always request something else so we can be fair. Thank you. This is longer than I wanted to write, but it’s better.
Thank you so much for the support. I am happy that you love my imagines!

- G. x

Warning: A little bit of Angst, mentions blood, swearing.


“What is happening, Clay?” You asked as you dealt with the shortness of your breath. Someone called you on your phone and said that your best friend Alex was in trouble with someone in the parking lot, so you had to run from the other side of the school department to the parking lot as fast as you could.

“I really don’t know. I am trying to see what’s happening.” He answered as he was tiptoeing in his dark coloured converse. He didn’t get any positive results on what he was doing so you started to pass in the middle of the people, trying to push them slightly to give you some space.

Once you arrived at the first row of the crowd, your heart sank and your mouth slightly hung open. You covered your mouth as the happening created a little knot in your stomach and it hurt yourself.

Alex was spitting blood out of his mouth as he got some punches from the one and only Montgomery de la Cruz, who was sitting on Alex’s abdomen while he let his anger out.

“Fuck off, de la Cruz!” You pushed him with all of your strength so he would stop punching Alex’s face as if it was some sort of punching bag. “Fucking, stop!”

“Fine, I’ll stop!” He raised his hands in defense, but he kicked Alex on his stomach one more time before picking his backpack up, it was surely thrown on the ground when they started the fight.

“Damn it! Go fuck yourself!” You shouted as you wanted to bang his head on a wall thousand times.

“Montgomery, you fucking asshole.” You heard Alex swearing under his breath and whining while he was holding his stomach.

“Alex.” You quickly caressed his arm as you let him know that you were by his side. You swore that you didn’t like seeing your best friend like this. Montgomery pushed some people so he could get out of that crowd around you.

“(Y/N).” He weakly called for you as he coughed harshly, caused by the savage and terrible kicks of Montgomery. You were worried as you saw Alex spitting thick, dense and scarlet blood one more time.

“Damn, Alex.” You bit your lower lip as you felt a little bit guilty for arriving later to save him. You gave him your handkerchief so he could wipe his mouth. “Guys, go back to your classes! The show is obviously done, this was the first and last episode of let’s just fucking watch Alex to get hurt and do nothing, so stop being nosey and mind your own fucking business!” You sarcastically shouted as you hated them for not stopping the asshole before.

“It’s okay, (Y/N).” He shook it off as if nothing has happened.

“You shush!” You rolled your eyes as you picked his backpack up and hung it on your free shoulder. “C'mon.” You grabbed his hand as helped him to get up from the ground. Alex could barely stand up straight and you could say that he was suffering inside.

“Let me help you with that, (Y/N).” Zach helped Alex to maintain his balance as he saw that you were struggling to handle your best friend and you started to walk towards the school’s parking lot.

“Lex, keys?” You asked him when you stopped in front of his car.

“Here.” He shakily handed you the keys and you shook your head for the damage that Montgomery has done to your best friend. You would seriously slap that jerk.

“Thanks.” You weakly smiled at him and opened his car. Zach guided Alex to enter the passenger’s seat.

“Can you do this alone?” Zach worriedly asked after he closed the car’s door.

“Yup, thank you.” You warmly smiled at him and he just smiled back at you.

“Text me, okay?” You nodded to assure him and you went to the driver’s seat. “Take care.”

“We will.” You and Alex smiled at him and you started to drive carefully, not wanting to hurt Alex even more. “Are you okay?” You looked at the rear-view mirror to assure that no one was following you. “Dumb question, I know.”

“My stomach still aches.” You then looked at him and you could see in his eyes that he was really trying so hard to mend the pain away.

“Damn it, Standall.” You sighed as you saw his nose soaked in dried blood, condensed and fractured. The almost brown coloured blood has mizzled down his face and shirt, like the rain water in a window pane.

“What?” He raised an eyebrow and it made you worried even more, because his left cheek was purple and he had a big black and blue circle around his left eye.

“I hate seeing you like that, Jesus!” You huffed once again and brought your focus back to the road.

Once you arrived at his house, you parked his car on its place and you helped him to walk and to maintain his balance. The house was empty, obviously, his parents had the day shift at work.

“Stay there.” You closed the door behind you and you ran up and down the stairs to get the things that you needed to cure Alex’s wounds.

“What are you searching for?” Alex asked as he noticed that you kept on searching for something on the same place.

“Liniments?” You raised your eyebrow and he indicated you the bathroom door right next to the living room. “Thanks.”

“Not a problem.” He answered and you suddenly heard him complaining, murmuring some things that you didn’t understand.

“What happened?” You put the liniments on the table, together with the other stuffs that you needed to cure Alex.

“I can’t even smile because of this thing.” He complaint as he watched you preparing your first aid paraphernalia.

“Yup, you got a bad busted lip over there.” You shook your head.

“Yeah, I can feel it.” He pouted as he tried to ease the pain.

“What did you do to be Montgomery’s punching bag?” You curiously asked as you squeezed a wet towel to take the dehydrated blood stains off his face and neck. “This might hurt a little.”

“Be careful.” He grabbed your arm as he guided your hand. You dabbed the now-stained towel softly and slowly as you saw him fussing for the pain.

“Sorry.” You bit your lip as you were so concentrated on cleaning Alex’s face. You didn’t notice that he was just looking at you to admire your beautiful face.

“So? What’s the reason?” You stopped to look at him and he suddenly panicked and avoided your eye contact.

“He was fantasizing about you.” You suddenly stopped to look at him and gave him your judging face. “What? He was saying that he’d like to fuck you.” He defended himself, believing that he did a right thing for you.

“And you got those bruises and wounds just for a thing like that?” You put the towel back to the basin and you faced him.

“Damn it, what’s wrong with that?” He kind of raised his voice and you knew that you couldn’t change his mind.

“Alex, you almost died. I prefer that he imagines dirty stuffs about me rather than I lose you!” You got the towel once again and you squeezed it properly before wiping his neck. His face was already clean and you could recognize him now.

“(Y/N), I was the one who got hurt so shut the fuck up! I can’t stand to see others doing that to you.” He pointed out as he moved his neck so you could clean every inch of it. He was angry, but you knew that he couldn’t hurt you. “That’s also called respect for you, for the girls, for every woman in this world.”

“And I can’t stand to see my best friend in that way either!” You threw the towel in the basin and, luckily, the water didn’t go all over the glass centre table. You shot him a death glare as he just rolled his eyes. “And respect? You expect Montgomery to have even a pinch of respect? No way!”

“That doesn’t matter, I am the boy here and I should defend you.” You got a cotton disk and you put a smidgen of disinfectant to clean his still open bruises. “And that’s exactly my point! He should respect you.”

“You’re not my knight in shining armour, so stop defending me. Defend yourself, instead.” You lightly tapped the cotton disk on his bruises and he kept on whining as it stung his face.

“Then fuck you!” Alex corrugated his forehead as he lost his shit once again. He was staying at his thought and you couldn’t change his mind.

“No, fuck you!” You pressed the cotton disk on one of his bruises and he pushed your hand away harshly because you hurt him.

“What the fuck!?” He breathed in deeply as if he was asking for more patience to tolerate your behaviour. “Damn, I would do this by myself if you’re just being an asshole!”

“You know that you don’t have to do that for me, Standall!” You got the cotton disk once again and you blew at his bruise to ease the pain. You calmed yourself down as you saw him miffed.

“I don’t care.” He sassily snapped at you. “I would even catch a bullet for you, if I need to.” You dabbed the cotton once again and you bit your lip as you realized that you crossed the line. He defended you and you should thank him for that.

“I’m sorry.” You murmured and Alex just smiled.

“You realized that I had the point here?” He smirked at you and you threatened him to press the cotton disk once again. “But I am right.”

“Damn, Standall!” You rolled your eyes. “You are right, you got the point, but stay still!”

“Thank you.” He had a teasing tone and you hated him for that moment.

You realized that Alex was the sweetest person that you’ve ever known, even though you didn’t want to see him in that way. Yes, he could defend you and everything, but if it cost him his life, he better not defended you because your best friend’s life was more important to you than what people had to say about you.

“Thank you.” You smiled at him and he just shook his head with a wide smile plastered on his face. “Seriously, though. You don’t have to.”

“But I want to and that’s final.” He crossed his arms and you unleashed a long deep sigh, because you knew that he would do everything just to win in that discussion you were having.

Alex was sweet and nice to do that to you, but you didn’t want for him to be in a crazy mess. You didn’t want to see him hurt or dying, just because he needed to defend you.

You remained silent as you put the liniments on his bruises. He seriously looked at you as he watched your hands, carefully touching his damaged skin.

“Take your shirt off, I need to check if you have broken bones there!” You wiped your hands using the towel and you saw Alex with a smirk on his face.

“Or maybe you want to take advantage of me.” He naughtily said and you just laughed for his silly attitude.

“Dork!” You rolled your eyes while you were laughing. People might think that you two are crazy, because you would fight the moment before and then laugh like there was no tomorrow after, but that was what you liked in your relationship with Alex. You couldn’t fight over things for a long time, so you never had any issue. “C'mon, take that stained shirt off.”

“I ask fifty bucks per clothing from my clients for this, but you are too special for me so it’s free.” He winked at you as he slowly took his shirt off, making it a little bit sexy and lascivious. “I must love you so much for doing a strip tease for free eh!”

“Lex, you’re the best.” You laughed loudly as you playfully slapped his arm. “You’re the best that I never had, promise.”

“I know and I am happy that I can make you laugh just like that.” He winked at you as he put the shirt on the table in front of you. You controlled if he had some broken bones, touching different parts of his naked chest with a delicate touch, but luckily, he didn’t.

“Here, put these on!” You tossed him a clean shirt and his sweatpants. “I’m not peeking.” You winked at him as you put the first aid kit back to its place, also cleaning the towel that you used to clean Alex’s face.

“Thank you for curing me.” Alex sweetly said as he followed you to the bathroom and hugged you from the back. This time he could walk, not properly but he could. “Sorry, because I said tough things.”

“No, I’m sorry.” You put his dirty and stained clothes in the washing machine. It was Alex’s home, but it felt like it was your home too. You spent most of your time in his home than your own home because of Alex. “I should be grateful to have someone who hasn’t got any problems on defending me.”

“I will always defend you, (Y/N).” You looked at the mirror as you washed your hands. You saw Alex smiling and you had to admit that he was still perfect even with those bruises. “What?”

“Nothing.” You smiled at him and splashed him a drop of water. “You make me happy, Alex.” You dried your hands with a dry and clean hand towel.

“And you make me happy, (Y/N).” He made you turn around and he grabbed your hand. You both went back to the living room and you sat in front of the turned off television.

“So, what would you like to do now?” You curiously asked as you looked at Alex’s blue orbs. You seriously found him handsome, even with purple coloured cheeks. You loved his tired big eyes and you glanced at him as he glanced back at you. Your eyes were telling something to each other, but you didn’t want to admit it.

“This.” He smiled at you as he slowly leant in to close the gap between the two of you.

You were shocked because you never expected that Alex would kiss you out of nowhere. You didn’t respond at first, but then you let yourself go and you shared a passionate kiss with Alex, tasting a little bit of liniment from the bruised part of his lip, but you didn’t mind it. He caressed your cheek as you played with his platinum blonde hair.

“Fuck!” He suddenly broke the kiss and a worried expression took over your face. “That kind of hurt.”

“I can imagine.” You giggled softly and Alex just smiled, secretly loving your giggles more and more. You didn’t care if it was strange that he kissed you, you loved it and you honestly craved for more.

“Maybe kissing suits better when this shitty stuff gets better.” He winked at you and you shook your head with a wide smile on your face. “How about cuddles?”

“Cuddles, specifically your cuddles, are perfect too.” You nodded your head and he hugged you tightly as you let yourself fall on the soft couch, having Alex on top of you.

“Haven’t you ever noticed that I loved you from the very beginning of our friendship?” Alex whispered, your faces were few inches apart.

“Never thought of that.” You shook your head while having a thinking expression on your face. “Is that why you always defend me?”

“Well, I think that it’s the time to confess you everything, since I even kissed you just few moments ago.” He raised his shoulders as he rolled beside you. “(Y/N), I love you so much.” You saw that Alex blushed a little bit and you couldn’t help but smile. “I don’t know how it happened, but I wake up every day, being more jealous and wanting to protect you from the people around us. I love your company and I don’t regret that I approached you during that first basketball game during the sophomore year, I am so thankful for the relationship that we have.” He honestly declared as he drew circles on your arms with his left hand. You could see him blushing even more as the sunlight fell slanting through the window pane and it made you smile wider.

“Oh, you were just jealous earlier, that’s why you lost your shit!” You pointed out and Alex laughed loudly. You were flustered because you didn’t know why he was laughing.

“Good morning, Captain Obvious!” He smirked at you and you giggled as you messed his hair up.

“You’re such an idiot, but I love you too Alex.” You sincerely confessed and you blushed a little bit as you met Alex’s happy gaze. You played with his septum ring as you giggled even more and he just shook his head. “I am thankful to have someone like you.”

You both leant in for another kiss, but, this time, it was just a simple one because you didn’t want to hurt him once again.

You were enthusiastically happy and thankful at that moment, because you were sharing a great relationship with your most beloved person in your life.


anonymous asked:

Hi there :) I love your take on andreil and I wondered if you would write something about Andrew being jealous/possessive of Neil? I always read fics where it's Neil in this situation.. thank u!! :)

i come bearing gifts, my wonderful anon. this was way too much fun to write. thank you for your request! also on AO3

send me prompts :)


“Kevin called today just to say that he’s emailing me extra drills to add to my training regimen. Because apparently I’m getting slower? Whatever. I told him to fuck off, but like that’s ever worked before,” Neil concludes. Andrew makes a vague sound of agreement, but since they’re on the phone, Neil has a hard time judging just how uninterested Andrew really is.

“Anyway,” Neil says, “I met up with Travis after practice to work on plays. He actually knows his shit, you know? He has this idea to keep Wilson back so that Singh can have better control of the line, and it’s genius. Singh is obviously superior when it comes to—”

“Travis?” Andrew interrupts him, suddenly sounding a good bit more attentive.

“Yeah, Travis Patterson. The one from the University of Texas?” Neil waits for some kind of acknowledgement but continues anyway when he gets none. “He’s easily our best backliner, aggressive as hell but knows where to draw the line. And he’s smart too, like he actually thinks before he makes a move. Which is rare.” Neil rolls his eyes at the general state of talent in the Professional Exy League, even though Andrew can’t see him. If he could, he would probably just glare and call Neil a junkie, so maybe it’s for the best. “I think we’re meeting up again on Thursday to go over specifics, make sure everything will really click before I try to implement the switch at practice,” Neil says, almost to himself. He gets up from the couch and makes his way into his bedroom, opening the top drawer on his nightstand and reaching for the stack of orange sticky notes in the back corner. He jots down “Travis - Thursday @ 7:00” and heads to the kitchen to press it to the refrigerator until it holds.

“What are you doing this weekend?” Andrew asks out of nowhere.

“I have a home game on Saturday afternoon, and then that charity event thing on Sunday…” Neil says, and it almost comes out as a question. Andrew knows this already. His team is off this weekend, but Neil’s schedule is so booked that they agreed it wasn’t worth the five hour plane ride.

“I’m coming. I can be there Saturday morning. 9:35,” Andrew states.

“Uh,” Neil blanks a bit out of shock but decides not to question it. Like he would ever complain. “Okay, yeah. I’ll be there to pick you up.”

“Okay,” Andrew says, disinterested tone back in full force.

“Hey, are you—” Neil begins, but Andrew has already hung up.

It isn’t abnormal for them to hang up without a proper goodbye, but there is usually at least a bit more ceremony to it. Neil shrugs to himself, chalking it up to Andrew being Andrew.

Andrew fucking hates flying.

This is news to no one. So this spontaneous five hour flight with only two days of mental preparation may seem ill-advised. And it is. Andrew knows that it is. But he hits “confirm” to book it anyway, cursing himself every step of the way. But he could only listen to Neil go on and on about Travis for so long before he cracked.

Andrew knows exactly who Travis is. Travis William Patterson, 27 years old, 6’3” backliner from middle of nowhere, Texas, current starter for the Boston Hurricanes, #9. As a matter of fact, Andrew is looking at him right now. ESPN is showing Exy highlights from last weekend, and Neil’s team just happens to be up at this very moment.

The Neil on screen has just performed some ridiculous move that absolutely should not have ended with a goal but somehow did, and he is immediately met with high-fives from his teammates and an affectionate-looking hug from Travis. Andrew can most certainly be objective, and this exchange looks pretty platonic. But Andrew is also a man attracted to men, and he has to admit that Travis is good looking. Really good looking. He’s got that whole good ol’ boy, yes ma’am/no sir, homegrown Southern cowboy appeal. If you’re into that. Which Andrew definitely isn’t, and he doesn’t think Neil is either.

Andrew knows that Neil isn’t the cheating type, but that doesn’t stop Andrew from feeling just a little possessive over him. He and Neil have been together for eight years now, so Andrew probably has nothing to worry about. And yet here he is, watching several hundred dollars drain from his bank account thanks to this impromptu flight.

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A DARKER SHADE OF MAGIC / A GATHERING OF SHADOWS by v. e. schwab sentence meme.

  • ❛  I’d rather die on an adventure than live standing still.  ❜
  • ❛  After all, you can kill people, but you cannot kill magic. Not truly.  ❜
  • ❛  Impossible. What a useless word, in a world with magic.  ❜
  • ❛  Everyone thinks I have a death wish, you know? But I don’t want to die – dying is easy. No, I want to live, but getting close to death is the only way to feel alive. And once you do, it makes you realize that everything you were actually doing before wasn’t actually living. It was just making do. Call me crazy, but I think we do the best living when the stakes are high.  ❜
  • ❛  You have two faces. One you wear for the world at large, and the one you wear for those you love.  ❜
  • ❛  Everyone’s immortal until they’re not.  ❜
  • ❛  It is as it is. It cannot be undone. So please, be grateful, and be done with it.  ❜
  • ❛  The thing about freedom? It doesn’t come naturally. Almost no one has it handed to them. I’m free because I fought for it.  ❜
  • ❛  I know you can do this. I know you can hear me. Stay with me. Listen to my voice.  ❜
  • ❛  Maybe you just got a taste of what it really means to be alive. You almost died. So now you know what it feels like to live. To fear for that life. To fight for it. And once you know, well, there’s no going back.  ❜
  • ❛  You made a mistake. Everybody makes them. Even me. I’ve made many. It’s only fair that you made one.  ❜
  • ❛  I did only what I had to do. If I could have given my life for yours, I would have.  ❜
  • ❛  A kiss for luck. Not that I need it.  ❜
  • ❛  I know. I know what and who you are. What will you do? Kill me?  ❜
  • ❛  Why am I the only one in this fucking world to be held accountable for my actions?  ❜
  • ❛  Aren’t you afraid of dying?  ❜
  • ❛  I’m sorry. For whatever happened to you. For whoever hurt you so deeply that you see things like friends and fondness as weapons instead of shields.  ❜
  • ❛  You know so little of war. Battles may be fought from the outside in, but wars are won from the inside out.  ❜
  • ❛  Between the two of us, we’ll tear the whole world down.  ❜
  • ❛  I am going to cut that smile off your face.  ❜
  • ❛  It hurts. More than dying ever did. There are days when I feel like I deserve this.  ❜
  • ❛  Death doesn’t scare me. Not nearly as much as the idea of wasting a perfectly good life in fear of it.  ❜
  • ❛ You’re always so eager to slash and stab, why couldn’t you have stabbed him.  ❜
  • ❛  Which is it, huh? You’re angry at me, or worried about me, or happy to see me? Because I can’t keep up.  ❜
  • ❛  Wouldn’t it be amazing, if we got away with it?  ❜

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