it's gonna kill me, but i'll do it

Can't imagine my otp taking a shower 'cause what if they kept fighting over the water temperature
  • Person A: the water is too cold
  • Person B: babe, the water is fine.
  • Person A: no. literally. i'm just gonna turn the hot tab a li-
  • Person B: FUCK THAT'S TOO HOT ARE YOUR TRYING TO KILL ME?
  • Person A: oh come on, don't exaggerate! it's only like two degrees hotter-
  • Person B: nooo let's just- *slightly adjusts water temperature*
  • Person A: *literally jumps out of shower* OK I JUST WANTED TO TAKE A SHOWER NOT RECREATE THE TITANIC SCENE
  • Person B: it's not my fault you like your shower scalding hot like what do you do in there? Practice damnation?
  • Person A: -_-
  • Person B: babe
  • Person A: no
  • Person B: love
  • Person A: i think i'll just- i think it's safer for both of our skins if i wait outside for you to finish?
  • Person B: ok :)
  • Person A: *gets out*
  • Person B: *singing* ICE ICE BABY
  • Person A: BITCH I SWEAR TO GOD-

I, uh, may or may not be dusting off my art skills to make some nanbaka fanart. If I actually get it finished I’ll post it here, so look forward to it I…guess…??

Bonus Theory

So at first glance, you could interpret “Always Watching” as Jack trying to make the pax video, but Anti interrupting and taking over the show.

However….

Recall that moment in “A Date With Markiplier” where a screaming Mark pops out of Darkiplier?

Originally posted by rubies-and-oaktrees

Mark said in the charity livestream after this, that this scene wasn’t him escaping but rather Dark’s shell breaking for a bit. So what does this have to do with Anti?

With the theory that Jack’s been “dead” since Halloween, Anti’s been running the channel and pretending to be him for about 5 months now!! And with Jack trying to fight back in Detention and Darkiplier taking the spotlight on Valentine’s Day, Anti and his attention-seeking self needed a release.

And considering that Pax was the place where literally SO MANY PEOPLE came for JACK (where maybe Jack could’ve gotten enough energy from everyone to defeat Anti maybe?), the video was a perfect way for Anti to A) be his glitchy self again without blowing his cover, B) stand his ground against Darkiplier, C) divert everyone’s attention from Jack to him with the whole camera thing (while also reigniting the antisepticeye fandom), all while D) making himself stronger, and making Jack’s chances of getting saved even lower than before.

And because of this, it’s probably safe to say that Anti has enough strength to keep Jack down for about another 5-7 months

and we all know the holiday that’ll come up by then…..

Illness-Based rp Starters
  • "You've been coughing a lot. You okay?"
  • "What is wrong with you?"
  • "Gosh, you're burning up!"
  • "Um, hey? Anyone in there? Hello?"
  • "Ugh, just blow your nose already."
  • "My head might just explode."
  • "I think I'm gonna hurl."
  • "If you get me sick, I'll kill you."
  • "Ah-choo!"
  • "Okay, that can't be allergies. Are you sick?"
  • "Geez, you look like crap."
  • "That is so gross."
  • "Hey, woah. Don't pass out on me here."
  • "You really should be in bed, you know."
  • "I'm too busy to spend all day in bed."
  • "I'b fide."
  • "Please tell me there's some cough drops left."
  • "Do you think it's warm in here?"
  • "You're so pale."
  • "Have you eaten today?"
  • "They told me you passed out. How do you feel?"
  • "I'm not getting out of bed."
  • "The soup is probably great, but I can't taste a thing."
  • "You know, that's not helping me feel better."
  • "My nose hates me."
  • "You should probably stay back. You don't want to catch this."
  • "Are you coming down with something?"
  • "My throat feels funny."
  • dally: i just miss johnny so much man. i hope he's okay and i hope that if he comes back i can stop being such a douche. cause i just block out all my emotions all the time cause i don't wanna get hurt, ya know? but he's like the light of my life. he makes me feel, man. and i just wanna protect him from all the bad things that keep happening to him but i can't actively do that because if i do then i'll blow my cover and everybody will find out how i feel and if i even admit how i feel to myself it'll ruin everything so i just have to protect him from a distance, but i feel like that isn't enough and it hurts. and now i really can't do anything because he's in a fucking church and he's gonna die in like two chapters and i can't take that. he's what's been keeping me going. i want to be a better man for him, because he deserves that you know. but it's hard and i feel like i'm not enough and i never will be enough and he's too pure and so i'll just ruin him even more. and sometimes i lie to myself and say everything will turn out fine but i know it won't. we're greasers and he just killed a kid and i can barely take care of myself let alone him. which i don't need to worry about too much i guess because he can hold his own in a rumble and stuff and he takes a shit ton of beatings from his old man. ugh i hate thinking about that. i wish we could both just go out in the country and live alone with a couple horses. maybe a dog, but it'd be his dog cause animals don't like me except for ponies. not ponyboy though i'm pretty sure that kid hates me. but it wouldn't matter cause it'd just be me and johnny cakes in a little country house with no worries at all. man i just wish we could be together. the world is fucked but i would beat the shit out of every single fucker in this town for me and him, you know man. he just makes me feel that strongly, y'know?
  • darry: what
  • sodapop: what
  • two-bit: what
  • steve: what
  • cherry: what
  • marcia: what
  • bob: what
  • the store clerk that dally pointed a gun at: what
  • s.e. hinton: what
  • the entire world: what
  • dally: i sAID I LIKE GIRLS AND ALCOHOL AND THE SUFFERING OF OTHERS,, NOTHIN LEGAL M,AN, I HAVE NO EMOTIONS WHATSOEVER, SEE WATCH ME BE APATHETIC, goD DON'T GET WISE YOU PUNKS
a bunch of starters from spiderman: homecoming trailers
  • "This is the coolest thing I've ever seen."
  • "This is the greatest day of my life!"
  • "Who's that new guy?"
  • "Gotta go!"
  • "That was awesome!"
  • "Don't mess with me."
  • "I'll kill you, and everybody you love."
  • "New move I'm working on."
  • "I stole his shield, then he beat me up."
  • "Why do you hate fun?"
  • "Nice try, buddy."
  • "So, you're gonna let me go?"
  • "What the hell?"
  • "We have thin walls here."
  • "They don't care about us."
  • "The world's changing. It's time we change too."
  • "So when's our next 'retreat'?"
  • "We'll call you."
  • "That's not a hug, I'm just grabbing the door for you."
  • "Good luck out there."
  • "This is my chance to prove myself."
  • "What if someone had died tonight?"
  • "That's on you."
  • "I wanted you to be better."
  • "We're going to take everything they got."
  • "You're not gonna stop me!"
  • "Finally! Here we go."
  • "We're not there yet."
  • "I stopped a Grand Theft Bicycle."
  • "Hey, could you do me a favor? Hold on to that."
  • "I helped this old lady and she bought me a churro."
  • "That was nice."
  • "I just feel like I could be doing more."
  • "This feels so strange."
  • "These weapons are crazy dangerous!"
  • "There are people who handle this sort of thing."
  • "Let go of me!"
  • "But we have a Spanish quiz!"
  • "You gotta get better at this part of the job."
  • "I don't understand."
  • "I'm intimidating!"
  • "Hey, where are you going?"
  • "What are you hiding?"
  • "I'm just kidding, I don't care."
  • "I'm sick of being treated like a kid!"
  • "What was that?"
  • "You were on the ceiling!"
  • "You said we were going to finish the death star?"
  • "She doesn't know?"
  • "Nobody knows!"
  • "You can't tell anybody about this!"
  • "I don't think I can keep this a secret, this is the greatest thing to ever happen to me!"
  • "I can't believe this is happening right now."
  • "Are there like, trials? Or an interview?"
  • "Just stay close to the ground!"
  • "Badass!"
  • "Forget the flying monster guy!"
  • "I was just trying to be like you."
  • "I screwed up."
  • "You need to stop carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders."
  • "I'll do anything to protect my family."
  • "I know you know what I'm talking about."
  • "I just gotta do this on my own."
  • "Just don't do anything stupid, alright?"
  • "We should probably stop staring before it gets creepy."
  • "You guys are losers."
  • "Just, don't do anything I would do."
  • "And definitely don't do anything I wouldn't do."
  • "There's a little grey area in there, and that's where you operate."
  • "I know you want to save the world, but you're not ready yet."
  • "Stay out of trouble!"
  • "What is going on with you?"
the foxes as things ive said
  • dan: my kink is when people start off sentences with "it's your fault"
  • kevin: i do not trust things that are smaller than me, such as children, insects, legos, and most animals
  • andrew: listen if stabbing him gives me closure i'm gonna do it
  • matt: if i find an eldridge god and live to tell the tale, i'll send you a selfie with it
  • aaron: google find me a hitman who will kill me for $7
  • seth: yes and being evil is fun??? it's the highlight of my day??
  • allison: i just bought a sweatshirt with the word "RIOT" on it and i feel like a part of my soul has been restored
  • nicky: can you be a bridesmaid at the wedding? the dresses are going to be fabrics of the universe and "squids" is the theme
  • renee: half the shit ive done in life has been illegal
  • neil: i'm 5'3" and will fight an eldridge monstrosity if given the chance
  • BONUS
  • wymack: how on earth did you manage to make that uncomfortable
The Outsiders Prompts Part ll

a/n: please give cred if you use ty! also requests are open

1. “I wrote you something”

2. “Do you think we’ll ever see each other again?”

3. “You’re so different from everyone else”

4. “If this was the last time you’d see me, what would you say?”

5. “You’re such a cliché”

6. “I know who you are”

7. “I think I just fell for you”

8. “Bite me”

9. “Keep talking like that”

10. “I think about you, like all the time”

11. “You’re blushing so hard!”

12. “What are you doing to me, baby?”

13. “I think we should run right about now”

14. “How are you so blind of my feelings for you!”

15. “You’re scaring me”

16. “You’re my every waking moment”

17. “Hm? Sorry”

18. “What do you want with me?”

19. “You can’t throw me away like a piece of trash”

20. “You disappeared for a while”

21. “I’m unforgettable babe”

22. “I’m walking away now!”

23. “Try to stop me”

24. “I’m rubbing off on you”

25. “Don’t go yet”

26. “You’re the reason I toss and turn at night”

27. “When I look at you it takes the air from my lungs”

28. “I fucked up. I fell for you. I fell for you so hard”

29. “Catch me if you can”

30. “And when you tell me you’re less than perfect it makes me want to shake you and tell you how amazing you truly are”

31. “That’s when time stood still”

32. “You have to do this”

33. “But you’re my dream”

34. “You can keep it if you want”

35. “I've never stopped. I'll never stop”

36. “You know you can use the door”

37. “It’s raining. Let’s go”

38. “Call me once you get there. Just in case”

39. “It’s been a while”

40. “Look up”

41. “Beautiful is an understatement”

42. “Fuck it. Just do it”

43. “I can’t breathe”

44. “You don’t know me”

45. “Take my ring”

46. “What does it look like i’m doing?”

47. “Fuck I love your voice”

48. “Shut up! It’s starting”

49. “Tell me what happened”

50. “God dammit! What the hell were you thinking?”

51. "I don't want to be alone anymore"

52. "I, I just see you standing there so unaware of your beauty. And-And I know I can't have you"

53. "You don't lose me that easily"

54. "It's my choice alright!

55. "I know i'm not good enough"

56. "I never wanted this to happen to you"

57. "You really got me going now"

58. "I had a dream about you"

59. "I thought you wouldn't show"

60. "I like it when you sleep with me. Nothing can hurt you as long as you're here with me"

61. "I did this to you. It's all my fault"

62. "I'm sorry. I happened to you"

63. "Just listen to this for a minute"

64. "Do you trust me?"

65. "It happened. It was amazing. I don't just want to forget about it"

66. "Get off of me!" 

67. "If you so much as look, breathe, think about her so help me god i'll kill you"

68. "Close your eyes"

69. "I'm not gonna hurt you. No ones gonna hurt you"

70. "Don't say that. Please don't say that"

71. "She's the type of person people write songs about"

72. "Let's runaway. Let's just go. Right now. Come with me"

73. "I'm tired of being afraid"

74. "There's smoke in my lungs. There's flowers in yours"

75. "I can see right through you"

76. "Friends, right?"

77. "I want to give you the world. I want to give you everything. But I can't"

78. "Take this. For protection"

79. "Hey now"

80. "Can I cut in?"

81. "Watch this"

82. "I can see the fire in your eyes" "I can see the universe in yours"

83. "I think you're gonna fuck up my entire life"

84. "Stay completely still. Don't move"

85."My dearest Y/N,-"

86. "Come back to me"

87. "You're breaking"

88. "We really loved each other, didn't we?"

89. "What's a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this?"

90. "Should I stay or should I go?"

91. "You'll wake the neighbors!"

92. "I'm so truly, madly, deeply in love with you"

93. "I'm not leaving you"

94. "I can't see you like this"

95. "Your hands are all greasy!"

96. "You burnt them!"

97. "It seems too good to be true"

98. "Break my heart"

99. "That always turns me on"

100. "-And when the Sun swallows the only earth we have. I'll still be there next to you" 

send in requests!

I’m gonna raise you this because I have enough asks telling me to kill my self for tswifty. So listen is it alright for her to tear down a dead women in the media just to get back at her son? Is that what feminism is for you? if she puts out that album on her anniversary that’s essentially what’s she doing. That’s all.

So that defendant guy was supposed to be a psychic and sees a premonition or some sort of JW losing/ crying over somebody??? (so there’s a sudden Fantasy plot twist eh?!)

why do I suspect its Eun Hyuk?

but whenever I think its gonna be him… my heart is being stabbed by the killer’s dagger a 100 more times!!!

THE DUDE DOES NOT DESERVE THAT CRUELTY!

TELL ME HOW COULD YOU HURT SUCH A PRECIOUS PUPPY??!!

Hamilton summarized [act two]
  • What'd I Miss: jazzy + snazzy jeff
  • Cabinet Battle #1: iLL SHOW YOU WHERE MY SHOE FITS
  • Take a Break: Ham isn't emotionally available sorry folks
  • Say No To This: spoiler alert! he doesn't say no
  • The Room Where It Happens: Burr doesn't get to hang out w/ the cool kids so he gets pissy
  • Schuyler Defeated: Sneaky Burr™
  • Cabinet Battle #2: Jeff is secretly Lafayette and he's pissed at Americans
  • Washington On Your Side: gee I wish Washington would notice me
  • One Last Time: time to get your shit together ham Washington is leavin
  • I Know Him: That's my replacement? HA
  • The Adams Administration: fat shaming isn't cool @ham
  • We Know: We got the dirt dudez
  • Hurricane: shit they know my secrets what if they like tell people? oh wait, I'll just do that myself lol
  • The Reynolds Pamphlet: if anyone's gonna slutshame me it's gonna be me
  • Burn: I'm cute but I'll kill you
  • Blow Us All Away: I'm cute like mi mum but I'm stupid like mi pop
  • Stay Alive [reprise]: Alexander you need to stop fucking everything up you killed OUR SON
  • It's Quiet Uptown: oh look I'm crying
  • The Election of 1800: lol lemme mess with burr just a lil more
  • Your Obedient Servant: literally the saltiest song you've ever heard feat. ham being all ham
  • Best Of Wives and Beat of Women: the early meeting out of town was his dEAth
  • The World Was Wide Enough: burr dun fucked up
  • Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story: while you were freaking dead I did some shit
  • Robert: Look, if it doesn't work out, we can always come back. I mean, what happened today, it doesn't have to change anything.
  • Aaron: Nothing's changed. It is what it is. I've just only realised it today, that's all.
  • Robert: You're tired, you're not thinking clearly.
  • Aaron: Stop talking, please. Just go. You're making it worse.
  • Robert: What, and leave you like this?
  • Aaron: Adam will come over.
  • Robert: No.
  • Aaron: Robert, don't be stupid.
  • Robert: I know you love me. That's why you can't even look at me. You love me and this is ridiculous.
  • Aaron: I do love you. I'll always love you. But this... I hate this. And if it carries on for long enough it's gonna end up killing me. (takes his ring off, holds it out to Robert) Take it. Just take it. (Robert takes the ring, Aaron kisses his cheek) I think you should probaby go now. Please. (Robert doesn't move) Robert, just go. (Robert looks and looks and then goes)
Mass Effect 2 - a (not so) short summary
  • Shepard: this is a routine mission
  • Joker: yeah we are just chillin in the empty calm space without worries that is the life eh
  • Shepard: tru homie no danger in sight we are just like little bugs in the infinite field of the universe
  • Collector's ship: DID SOMEONE SAY BUGS *destroys the Normandy*
  • Shepard: OH DEAR MAKER WHAT'S THAT
  • Shepard: sorry wrong quote
  • Joker: let me save the ship
  • Shepard: let me save your fragile ass
  • Joker: Shepper nooooooo
  • Shepard: Shepper yooooooo *crashes into a planet like a comet and dies*
  • Joker: look at that lemme make a wish real quick
  • Joker: I wish one day I'll fuck a robot
  • ---
  • Miranda: Allusive Man we found Shep's corpse
  • Illusive Man: nice now let's spend a shitload of money to resurrect him/her
  • Miranda: cool let's make him/her our slave by modifying the brain
  • Illusive Man: damn girl what is your problem we can't manipulate someone's mind that's fucked up shit
  • Illusive Man: anyway how is the project of turning Grayson in a human reaper going?
  • ---
  • Shepard: *wakes up after a 2 years coma*
  • Miranda: Shepard we're under attack stand up and fight u inferior slut
  • Shepard: aw shit I can barely move *runs like a leopard* *fight like a demon from hell* *tears shit up*
  • Jacob: hurry up commander
  • Shepard: wait I need answers
  • Jacob: Shepard for the love of god we're in the middle of a fight mechs are shooting at us we can't talk rn
  • Shapard: so how was your day?
  • Jacob: OMG it was nice thank you, I wake up and had a toast then I did some push ups then...
  • Miranda: let's get out of here gossip girls
  • ---
  • Illusive Man: hello I'm Cerberus' boss listen to me you have to find out why humans are disappearing
  • Shepard: fuck you Intrusive Man I don't work for you
  • Illusive Man: I revived you
  • Shepard: oh fuck ok then
  • ---
  • Tali: holy fleet Shap is that u
  • Shepard: ye it is me Tali I missed you so much
  • Tali: cool bye
  • Shepard: no wait Tali join my squad
  • Tali: nah better later I got stuff to do now
  • ---
  • Mordin: *fast shit-talking*
  • Shepard: haha I like you I'll make sure nothing bad will ever happen to you trust me
  • ---
  • Kasumi: god I miss Keiji so much I will never love again
  • Jacob: hey
  • Kasumi: yooooooooooo
  • ---
  • Shepard: Zaeed you squinter swine you set fire to a refinery just to find your boyfriend we are all going to die
  • Zaeed: that fucker shoot me in the head
  • Shepard: aaw isn't this love
  • ---
  • Grunt: Shepurd I feel strange I just want to kill everybody and destroy everything
  • Shepard: oh Grunt baby it's perfectly normal you're just becoming a woman
  • Wrex: Shep he is a krogan. Male. It's like our puberty
  • Grunt: do you mean I don't need this XXXXL tampon?
  • ---
  • Thane: my son is in trouble and my wife is dead
  • Shepard: k
  • Thane: "The fire has gone to be kindled anew.” He begs them not to take her away. They let her body slide into the water. He hits me. “Don’t let them! Stop them! Why weren’t you–” It rains. It always rains on Kahje. Warm water pours down his face.
  • Shepard: Cole is that you
  • Thane: what
  • Shepard: what
  • ---
  • Jack: fuck you and fuck everything and fuck Cerberus in particular
  • Shepard: girl put a shirt on it's raining cats and dogs
  • Jack: fuck shirts fuck cats and dogs and fuck me
  • Shepard: kinky
  • ---
  • Samara: help me kill my daughter
  • Shepard: shit why everyone in my squad are psycopath or have tragic stories and why do I have to solve everyone's problem?
  • Samara: so you won't help me?
  • Shepard: sure I'll help you let's do it girl
  • ---
  • Garrus: guess who's fucking back and ready to be romanced
  • Shepard: fuck yes I'm gonna date the shit out of you
  • Garrus: ...
  • Shepard: so-
  • Garrus: shut up I'm calibrating
  • ---
  • Shepard: why do you have a piece of my armor you creepy weirdo
  • Legion: there was a hole
  • Shepard: are you telling me you just have to close every hole you see?
  • Legion: yes
  • Shepard: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
  • ---
  • Shepard: all right let's go kill all collectors as requested from the Incisive Man
  • Harbinger: we are the beginning, you are the end
  • Shepard: yeah I'm YOUR end
  • Party members: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHH SNAP!
  • Harbinger: this hurts me
  • Shepard: fuck my second life what is that big ass blue motherfucker
  • EDI: it's a human reaper
  • Shepard: woah tough shit better destroy this ship and everything in it
  • Illusive Man: wait Shepard don't do it we need this technology
  • Shepard: shut up Disquisitive Man I do what I want and I want to tear this abomination up
  • Illusive Man: damn no I should have enslaved your mind when I had the chance
  • Miranda: called it
  • Shepard: well too fucking bad Dispositive Man let's do this homies
  • ---
  • Shepard: and that's how I saved the day once again
  • Hackett: Shepard you gangsta you forgot to say you killed 300.000 batarian in the process
  • Shepard: I do it for a good cause
  • Hackett: what cause
  • Shepard: peace
  • Hackett: *cries* this is beautiful
  • Shepard: I know buddy
  • Hackett: you're under arrest
Things me and my friend have said while playing video games: sentence starters
  • "DON'T YOU KNOW I HAVE THINGS TO PILLAGE?"
  • "I liked earlier how that guard told us we were under arrest and we murdered him."
  • "Hint: Don't feed alligators."
  • "I thought I'd just throw myself at it. See if it broke."
  • "Tortuga is a great place for a house."
  • "I just wanna stand on the front of the boat!"
  • "I almost got my ass handed to me by a crab just now."
  • "There's some dude leaping back there."
  • "Also, where can I get one of them fly hats?"
  • "It's like $10,000. So. I just need to multiply. By a thousand."
  • "Oops, that may've been my fault. I fired at someone."
  • "I want to find my house. It's not the jail though, I can tell you that."
  • "I totally thought I'd found you but it's just some blonde bitch."
  • "I found where you can buy a kickass red coat for $1,000!"
  • "I can get a boob tattoo, oh my god!"
  • "We need to murder some peeps for money, to be honest."
  • "And then we can get tricked out coats and boob tattoos like ladies do."
  • "Just found some gold. And another sword. On the corpse of this guard that attacked me."
  • "I'm gonna run into the forest."
  • "I just killed a gator, got an outfit, and $5."
  • "Well, I'll go to jail and you can pick me up there."
  • "IT WAS GONNA EAT MY CORPSE!"
  • "I just kicked down the door to my cell and the guard let me run out."
  • "Yeah, let's see who we can murder~"
  • "You ready to shoot some shit?"
  • "OH YEAH, GREAT IDEA, JUST TAKE ON 6 OF THEM ALL AT ONCE!"
  • "Damn, you literally took us to the edge of the world!"
  • "Oh oops. I think I killed your gator friend."
  • "It's trying to lead you down the path of righteousness."
  • "But I am a PIRATE!"
Watching Silicon Valley 4x10
  • Jared : *opening the door* Richard, what do you want from me?
  • Richard : Nothing, it's just you were right about all of it. I killed Anton, and, uh, I lost all of Melcher's data, everybody fucking hates me, and I'm basically one blood boy away from being Gavin Belson. I did not run the company with integrity but I'm gonna end it with some. I'm going to Melcher's office, and I'm coming clean. Anyway I'm really fucking sorry, man. Well, I'll leave you alone now. Hey. This guy fucks.
  • Me : Aaaaaawwwweee, it's so goddamn cute and... this is really the most beautiful relationship on the show. I'm melting.

anonymous asked:

I'm one of the anons who got into Dishonored because of you, and I need to know: do you have any way to in-universe justify sparing Daud? Bc he makes really poor case for himself: he feels bad (yeah, ME TOO, buddy), but he'll vanish and never do it again (which happens for sure if you stab him). No "I'll serve the new Empress to atone," or something, he just wants to leave the place that makes him feel bad. I just don't see why Corvo would let him completely off the hook. Thoughts?

okay, I’m gonna be honest here, I dont usually talk about it, but I find daud very boring and cliched and with zero character exploration or even reasons why he’s doing things. Like why killing Jess ~~changed him and made him regret and shit? People were telling me its bc he didn’t expect everything to get so much worse after Jess died, but like???? You kill a ruler of the empire in the middle of plague and kidnap her heir and you’re SURPRISED everything falls apart? you’re kind of a dumbass then, sorry, can’t relate. 

And yes, I think there’s 0 reasons for Corvo to let him go - or even let him “serve”, bc he was betrayed like 2 times in a row, why the fuck would he trust the murderer of his loved one? basically I agree with that post completely

  • Eren: ok, Annie, seeing as you decided to torment me during our last campaign, I hope you get a good roll. Because if you do-
  • Annie: whatever. Do your worst.
  • Mikasa: his worst might have your assassin dangling from a vine in front of a bunch of orcs.
  • Annie: can it, Ackerman. *points at Mikasa* ok, I'm going to stab her.
  • Eren: roll for it.
  • Annie: *rolls and grimaces* shit
  • Eren: what did she get?
  • Mikasa: a four
  • Eren: *grins* as you try to stab Amateratsu, you stumble into her, effectively shoving her out of the way of an oncoming orc fight.
  • Annie: *groans* fuck you.
  • Eren: *rolls probability* and as you both land from the stumble, you accidentally kiss.
  • Mikasa: Eren!
  • Annie: No!
  • Eren: do you want to try and kill her while she's distracted?
  • Annie: I'll strangle her.
  • Mikasa: *scowls* what the fuck did I ever do to you?
  • Annie: you're a smartass and the last time we were on a quest, you jokingly tried to sell me to a dwarf.
  • Mikasa: *shrugs* he's a little shorter than you- maybe you'd like that in a husband
  • Annie: *slaps Mikasa's shoulder* I'm gonna strangle her.
  • Eren: roll.
  • Annie: *rolls and hides her face* please just kill me and get it over with.
  • Mikasa: why can't I react to any of this?
  • Eren: it's your turn next. Annie, what did you roll?
  • Annie: *mutters* two.
  • Eren: *busts out laughing* you bring your hands up to her neck to try and strangle her but find yourself mesmerized by Amateratsu's beauty.
  • Annie: I hate you.
  • Mikasa: I'm gonna roll to kick her ass.
  • Eren: go for it.
  • Mikasa: *rolls* what the fuck
  • Annie: *groans* no, no, no, why?
  • Eren: *looks and grins* a six. You manage to flip your positions but find that the assassin is incredibly pretty with her half-elf features. I want both of you to roll a save.
  • Both: *roll and look at each other's dice, each groaning* fuck.
  • Eren: a four and a two. You spend a romantic night together!
  • Annie: *to Mikasa* I'm going to kill your brother.
  • Mikasa: what npc do you love most Eren? Because I'm going to slaughter them ten ways and then feed them to my wolf.
  • Eren: *smirks* you can try. But you might end up asking him to perform the wedding for you and Annie.
WANTED: DEAD OR ALIVE STARTERS || SEASON 1
  • "Listen, I wasn't on his/her side."
  • "They're going to ask questions."
  • "You're a smart man/woman."
  • "I just want to be around to get a little smarter."
  • "It's easy when you get the knack."
  • "Who are you? Wh-what do you want?"
  • "You're good to me dead or alive."
  • "I've heard a lot about you and not very much of it has been good."
  • "Oh, you're gonna pay for this, and the price is gonna be real high."
  • "What happened to him/her/them?"
  • "You know, one of these days you're gonna make me mad."
  • "I'll kill ya soon as look at ya."
  • "Looking for people is my job. Finding them guilty isn't."
  • "I'm not looking for trouble."
  • "It's not fair."
  • "Somebody oughta pay for his/her death."
  • "He fought all his life against the bottle."
  • "He lost."
  • "We've got our own private hell out here."
  • "It may be hard for you to understand, but when it comes to justice, I favor the law."
  • "What do you know about justice?"
  • "I didn't shoot him!"
  • "Old age runs in the family. I'd hate to spoil the record."
  • "Most of the things I've heard about you are unpleasant."
  • "He's dead."
  • "Pretty ugly words coming from such a pretty girl/boy."
  • "One day I looked out and it hit me. I was living in a jail."
  • "Misery loves company and you're all I got."
  • "I only got eight cents."
  • "This isn't a world of make-believe."
  • "It's a world of scrambling against things you can't win."
  • "You close his eyes, you close his mouth."
  • "Give me one drink, for the road?"
  • "Don't make me kill you."
  • "Let 'em kill each other!"
  • "You're breakin' my heart."
  • "I'm the dirt under everybody's feet."
  • "First time in a week I feel clean."
  • "I'm gonna put a price on his head and a target on his back."
  • "What's the matter? Really?"
  • "We've been friends for a long time. Now why this push?"
  • "Does it make that much of a difference what they think?"
  • "I'm not looking for trouble."
  • "Trouble has a way of finding you."
  • "Y'know, I hardly ever think about you at all."
  • "You ever take advice?"
  • "I don't fancy diggin' a grave with nothin' but a pocket knife."
  • "I got a feeling somebody tried to kill me."
  • "I don't want him/her killed, I want him/her destroyed."
  • "You got here quick."
  • "You look very pretty."
  • "I'm an angel."
  • "I learned a long time ago, you keep your nose where it belongs, you'll keep it."
  • "You take all the meanness in the world, and throw in about half the muscle, grind it up and pour it out, and that's him."
  • "It isn't my town, it isn't my problem."
  • "Compared to the rest of this town, I'm a giant."
  • "My best dog's dead."
  • "I didn't kill your dog!"
  • "I call you a liar!"
  • "I call your kin liars!"
  • "Your whole family ain't fit to slop down with the dirtiest pig in the world!"
  • "You say your good-byes now, 'cuz I'm gonna kill ya!"
Titan A.E. Starter Sentences
  • I've got to be scarce for a while.
  • Such motherly concern for the subject.
  • Now go look at something shiny for a while.
  • Does this look familiar? Do you know what it is? Neither do I.
  • Why am I naked?
  • I put at button on it. Yes. I wish to press it, but I'm not sure what will happen if I do.
  • Imprison the boy.
  • I'm uhh still naked here.
  • I've finished my nap!
  • You can't call a planet 'Bob'!
  • Maybe I've been wrong all these years, and it's taken your inspiring speech to make me see it. You've really changed me. It's beautiful. I think we've gotta hug.
  • I think we've fallen in with a very bad crowd.
  • They're locking down the doors!
  • We're not going forward, we're going up.
  • In or out?
  • Just out of curiosity, do we have a plan B?
  • Jettison the girl.
  • What exactly are we looking for?
  • It's commonly known as helping.
  • How long were they standing there?
  • Everyday I wake up and it's still the present. The same grimy, boring present. I don't think this "future" thing of yours exists.
  • I'll just take a little...nap, since I'm so...very sleepy.
  • Your not gonna shoot me, kid.
  • My scanners are showing a veritable cornucopia of nothing!
  • An intelligent guard. Didn't see that one coming.
  • You lied. Everything you said, everything you told me...?
  • The only thing that matters is grabbing what you can before somebody else beats you to it.
  • I think I'm going to call it... 'Bob'.
  • Should I get out and push?
  • The least they could do is kill my food before I eat it.
  • Fight the good fight, precious!
  • Is it dead? Can we eat it?
The Purge Starters
  • We are gonna play the rest of this night out in motherfucking peace. Does anyone have a problem with that?
  • Incoming reports show this year's Purge has been the most successful to date, with the most murders committed.
  • There you are...
  • Thank you for accepting my invitation
  • Now tell me why haven't you delivered the filthy swine to me yet?
  • Are you protecting him? I certainly hope not.
  • I just can't find him you see this is a misunderstanding my son let him in, he's a young boy he doesn't know better...
  • I support what goes on here tonight one hundred percent
  • I sell security equipment, see I would never deny yours or anyones right to purge
  • Just give us the homeless pig you fuck
  • Sorry about that I don't condone that kind of behavior
  • Just keep in mind, he was my friend and you are not.
  • Our equipment is arriving soon and we will get him, send out he, or that, will be thee.
  • I'll go get him.
  • Now get the hell out of my house.
  • You just gave our son/daughter a gun.
  • You wanna tell me what the hell we're doing?
  • We're gonna fight
  • We're gonna make it through tonight and everything's going to be okay.
  • Nothing is ever going to be okay again
  • Our target for this year's purge is hiding in your home. You have one hour to find him and give him to us or we will kill all of you. We will be coming in.
  • Shhh. It's OK. Your soul has been cleansed. You've purged.
  • Just one question for you was his life worth yours? Your family's?
  • Thank you for this unforgettable purge
  • Tonight allows people a release for all the hatred and violence that they keep up inside them.
  • Why don't you guys kill someone tonight?
  • Why didn't he just cut off his penis?
  • We are having dinner! No penises!
  • DID YOU HEAR ME, GRACE? NO MORE KILLING TONIGHT!... Isn't that hard to understand?
  • Decriminalised Murder. An outlet for American Rage.
  • Why did you let him in our home? We have no idea who's after him