it's every look she had i promise

Not hungry (Smut at the end)

Anon: Hey, so I was wondering if you could do a one shot where y/n isn’t eating things because she feels too fat, but dans really cute about it and watching what she eats and its really fluffy and cute and maybe smut? I love your writing by the way :) thanks!

I hope this is okay :) I apologise for any mistakes and the terrible writing, I am rather exhausted from work and lack of sleep. xxoo 

WARNING: Involves eating disorders and ends with smut

This had happened before, although previously you found a way to stop yourself. You promised yourself it wouldn’t happen again but as you looked into the mirror you couldn’t help but pick at every inch of your skin.
It had begun again… It had started with only having the occasional snack but as your insecurities grew, you found your hunger disappearing.
The only difference between last time and now, is Dan. Dan Howell was the man that you fell head over heals for, but you never felt good enough for him. He would tell you everyday that he loves you, but you stubbled to believe him… How could anyone love someone like you?

This time you had to come up with excuses for not eating..

“I’m not hungry”
“I don’t feel too well”
“I already ate”

All excuses Dan has now heard. You thought it was working but little did you know that Dan was watching everything the you were doing… Stressing about ever meal you missed until he couldn’t take it any more.

“Y/n, Sweetheart? Could we talk for a minute?” Dan questioned, his eyes dark and tired from the sleep he missed as he worried over you.

“Of course. Whats up?” You replied as you joined him on the sofa.

“I know what you’ve been doing Y/n…” He looked into your eyes as he spoke.

“What do you mean? I haven’t been doing anything?”

“You’ve been skipping meals… in fact I’ve not seen you eat one thing in the last three days. It’s not good for you y/n”

You felt sick, your stomach falling as you could no longer keep eye contact with your beloved boyfriend. Dan reached over and took your hands into his own large ones.

“Why are you doing this to yourself y/n?”

“I’m not good enough… I’m fat, I’m unattractive… You could do so much better than me” Your words came out in a whisper as you stared down at the floor.

“Sweetheart… Look at me. That is all bullshit, every bit. I couldn’t do any better than you, and you know why? Because there is no better than you.  You are the most kind, caring, and incredibly gorgeous girl I’ve every know to exist. And no matter what size or shape you are, thats never going to change.” As Dan’s words faded out, your heart clenched at the sight of tears building up in his eyes.

“I love you Dan” Is all you can say as now tears are escaping your eyes. Dan lets go of your hands and stroke away the tears with the pad of his thumbs.

“I love you too Y/n… so, so much.” Dan replies, giving you a quick kiss on the lips.

“You are perfect baby, so please… Try to start eating again? I will be here to help you with every step. I know you can’t just go straight back to normal and it may be a bit of a process, but please… for me?” You could see the determination in his eyes as he spoke, he really did care and you knew he would do anything to help you.

“Okay” You answer him, your voice a bit raspy as you try not to cry. Dans eyes brighten as you accept his request. He cups your face in his hands and connects your lips in a passionate and meaningful kiss.

Within moments Dan had pulled you onto his lap, holding you close to his body. Soon enough Dans lips travelled down your jaw and neck, sucking and nipping at your sweet spot as he made sure to leave his mark on you. Dan tugged at the base of your top, lifting it up and of off your body.

“So fucking beautiful” He groaned as he took in your bare skin that he loved oh so much.

You returned the favour to Dan, tugging his t-shirt off and running your fingers down the soft skin of his rising and falling chest. You could tell how worked up Dan was, his skin hot and sensitive to every little touch.

“I want to make you feel as perfect as you are” Dan spoke as his hands slid up under your skirt, finding your panties quickly.

“I can already feel how wet you are baby”

Dan expertly removed your panties, his fingers returning and running up and down your wet heat. You couldn’t help but release gasps of pleasure. One of his long and skilful fingers circled your entrance before slowly dipping in. Dans lips found yours, his tongue exploring your mouth that he knew oh so well while his finger pumped in and out of you.

You were close to release, and Dan knew it. He wanted you to release around him however, so he removed his hand from between your legs and lay you on your back on the sofa. Dan unzipped his dark jeans and pulled them down enough for his hard length to spring free.
You watched, almost hypnotised as he pumped himself a few times before hovering over you and lining himself up with your entrance.

“Are you ready, baby?” He asked, always needing your okay.

“Yes, Please Dan..” You moaned out, and with that Dan slowly slid himself into your tight heat.
All that could be heard in the room was the both of your heavy breaths and pleasure filled groans and moans. It was not hard and rough, but slow and passionate. Dans hips rocking back and for at a steady pace while you explored each others bodies.

“Dan… I’m going to-“ You started but cut yourself off with a moan.

“Go on baby, let go for me…”

That was all you needed to hears as your walls clenched around Dans length and the knot in your stomach was finally released. You could feel Dan releasing into you as he buried his face into the crook of your neck while leaving delicate little kisses.

“My gorgeous girl” Dan said as he looked into your eyes, a thin layer of sweat across his forehead.

“What do you say we have a nap and then I take you out for dinner?” Dan question, to which you smiled.

“Sounds perfect"