it's actually been almost 2 years since i made something like this

'BTS Dishes About Their US Tour, Songwriting Process, & Onstage Style'

TWIST: What are you most excited about for your return to the US?

BTS: The size of the tour got much bigger than last time we were in the US back in 2015. It’s almost 10-fold this time. 5 arena shows in 3 cities sold out in less than 5 minutes! We’re amazed by the fact fans in the USA are passionate and supportive and we’re super excited to come back to meet them all.

TWIST: What is the most exciting part of touring around the world, and what has been the most challenging so far?

BTS: The most exciting part of touring around the world is that you get the unique opportunity to meet different people from various background. Regardless of their differences, they sing BTS songs in unison and cheer for us, and it is very special experience for all of the band. On the other hand, the most challenging part has been the life on the road, being far away from our family and friends for weeks.

TWIST: Which of your songs are you most looking forward to performing on this part of the tour?

Rap Monster: “Spring Day.” I wrote the main melody for the lead single for the first time and also wrote lyrics.

SUGA: “Spring Day.” I wrote main lyrics based on my personal experience with old friends. It is about my sad memories with him and it makes me sentimental whenever I listen to the song.

Jungkook: “Not Today.” It has the coolest beat of all songs in the album and I personally like the choreography for the song.

J-Hope: “FIRE.” It has always been my favorite and the song has all the essence of BTS can show to the audience on stage.

TWIST: What’s the best piece of advice you’ve gotten in your career?

Rap Monster: “If you’re tied up with not gaining approval from others, you’ll never be able to move forward.”

TWIST: How would you say you and your sound have evolved over the years since first forming the group?

BTS: BTS sound has evolved since our debut in 2013 but has rooted its music in western pop music and hip-hop. We try to adapt all the hottest trends in pop music scene and that’s why fans around the world like it despite the cultural differences. All members listen to different genres of music all the time, from EDM, hip-hop, R&B to hip-house… and we believe BTS is kind of creating a new category of music genre beyond K-Pop.

TWIST: Do you remember the first song you ever wrote, what it was about, and what inspired you to write it?

Rap Monster: I don’t remember the name of the song, but there was an online community of amateur rappers who gathered together. I downloaded a beat from another amateur beat maker and I wrote a song based off of that. The song didn’t really make much sense, I just wrote it using every hard word I possibly knew. I actually found the song 2 years ago on my computer and listened to it thinking “What is this?” It was a mess.

TWIST: Have you ever written a song in a strange or unusual place? Or been inspired by something totally random?

Rap Monster: So many, I think I wrote a song while I was at the Grand Canyon in 2009. I had a trip to Vegas/Grand Canyon and I think I wrote a song there because I was shocked by the scenery. I definitely don’t remember what it was about though.

TWIST: Who are some artists that you would love to collaborate with?

BTS: There are so many artists we would love to collaborate with, such as Drake, J Cole, Justin Bieber… The list goes on and on.

TWIST: Which other artists/songs are on your personal playlists?

BTS: Drake “Fake Love”, The 1975, Kehlani, Lorde.

TWIST: How would you describe your personal fashion senses?

BTS: It’s mix of gothic and Japanese street wear. My recent favorite brands are WTAPS, Neighborhood and Yoji Yamamoto.

TWIST: And how does your personal style differ from the costumes you wear onstage?

BTS: Onstage clothing for BTS is custom-made to maximize our performance while being matched with the concept of each song.

TWIST: What is it like when fans recognize you on the street/ask for photos? Is it crazy? Surreal? Overwhelming?

Rap Monster: It’s a really nice experience to have somebody who knows me, but sometimes I like to be alone and hang around the city. I think it depends on the situation. There are some situations that I want to not be noticed by others, but people easily notice me. I’ve been told that I’m too unique (my walk and my clothes) and I’m easy to recognize, and I think that’s really nice. If I’m an artist or an idol and nobody knows me that would be sad.

TWIST: Can you share a fun fact about one of your other band members that you don’t think even the most dedicated fans will know?

Rap Monster: Many people think that SUGA is like the Grandfather of the group, but he acts more like a little kid. Jimin is the opposite, he looks like a baby but inside he’s mature and like a Grandfather.

Surprise - you get a bonus Hiveswap developer interview today!

Hello there Hiveswap and Homestuck fans, Ash here! Now, I know what you’re thinking: “What madness is this? Ash said there’d only be *one* Hiveswap development team interview per week going forward! And he said they would be on WEDNESDAYS! This isn’t a Wednesday!”

Right you are, and that’s exactly why surprises are so much fun! Now, last week I mentioned that the next interviewee would be our superstar UI designer and all-around graphics guy Tauhid. Our interview with him will still be going live this week on Thursday, so definitely look forward to that, but today we’ve got another talented team member in the hot seat: Tom Hunt, our lead programmer and the prime coding whiz in charge of things on the technical side of things! Take it away, Tom!

Introduce yourself to the fans! What is your specific role on the Hiveswap team?

Hi, I’m Tom. I make stuff in Unity, which is a cross-platform 3D game engine and editor that can make all kinds of things - including the very 2D game you’re here to read about! My company neocade and I are working freelance on Hiveswap, with me as the lead programmer. Mostly, I direct and coordinate the team of programmers and quality assurance (QA) testers that are putting this game together. Sometimes I also write code.

When and how did you get your start on the Hiveswap project?

Sometime late last year, I was looking for a gig. At the time, What Pumpkin Games was looking for an additional Unity programmer. A mutual business contact introduced us via email, and we went from there.

Tell us a little bit about your career background! How did you get your start in programming? Do you have any advice for others looking to enter this field?

I’ve been programming computers since I was a little kid. I got my first actual programming job about a month after graduating high school, and did that for a bit during breaks while I was in college. It wasn’t very exciting, had nothing to do with video games, and didn’t pay a whole lot, but it sure beat taping up boxes of hot dogs in a factory all day.

The only advice I can really give to someone looking to enter the video games field is to just start making video games. Game development tools are more readily available now than they’ve ever been.

Also make lots of friends, especially with people who can draw or write or anything. If you live near a city, there is probably at least one game dev meetup somewhere - go to those and meet people. Get over whatever shyness you have, because almost every game that ever gets made is the result of a lot of teamwork.

We’re making a video game, so of course the question must be asked: what’s your favorite game of all time?

I played the heck out of Super Metroid back in the day. There’s something about that game. I would do speedruns of it - so now, every time I go back and play it, it all just feels so fluid. There’s a fairly robust set of inputs mapped out in a way that makes sense to my fingers. The entire game itself is fairly tightly bounded - a complete playthrough can take less than 90 minutes - so in a way, this beautifully detailed, explorable world is also actually kind of respectful of my time (more so than, say, a game like Skyrim, which is almost always a multi-hour/day/week commitment).

What games are you playing currently (if any)?

To be perfectly honest, I have not been playing NEARLY enough video games lately. That being said, aside from Hiveswap, I am currently into little mobile action puzzlers that I can play on the bus. Super Hexagon and Desert Golf are great. Just tried Polyforge this morning, too; that was pretty fun.

A lot of my friends are playing Breath of the Wild. I really want to just go get a Switch and play that, but I’m afraid of that eating up my time like Skyrim did.

Are there any games that you currently use or have used as inspiration for your own programming work here on Hiveswap, or just in general?

Not really - I tend to look at each technical problem on its own merits. The creative side of things is all handled by the What Pumpkin folks. I don’t really get involved with that too much. I just work to make sure their vision is implemented, however that needs to be done.

Imagine you’ve been given an unlimited budget and time frame to make your dream game. Tell us (briefly!) about that game in terms of genre, style, platforms, etc. Is it an original game or a long-desired sequel to an existing game? Go crazy!

Given an unlimited budget and time to work on a “dream game,” I’d have to go with some kind of deeply-simulated, massively multiplayer VR thing.

What’s your workstation like?

As a programmer, I like my workstations to be fast, reliable, and quiet. I always max out the RAM on a new machine if I can, because disk thrashing is just annoying as all hell. I’ve been really digging M.2 drives lately. Also, having extra monitors is always nice.

Do you like to listen to any particular kinds of music while you work? If so, tell us about it!

Mostly instrumental electronic music. Sometimes I’ll throw on some classical. Video game soundtracks are usually a pretty good bet. I can’t listen to anything with spoken words in it, though - too distracting.

Do you have a personal message you’d like to relay to all the Homestuck and Hiveswap fans out there?

Thank you all for being so patient with this project!

Thank you, Tom! Well folks, I hope you’ve enjoyed this week’s surprise bonus interview, and remember to check back on Thursday for yet another behind-the-scenes peek into Hiveswap’s development! As I teased last week, our very own Tauhid Bondia will be on hand to talk about his indispensable (my word, not his!) graphics and user interface design work on Hiveswap. See you then, everyone!

victarionsrighthand  asked:

What do you think about Sansa's crush on Loras? Do you think it means something that no matter how much she seems to grow as a character she still holds a crush over some pretty knight that never really seemed to care about her and she still imagines him when she kisses people (even if her thoughts get directed back to sandor)

Well… Loras is a very safe crush.

Loras plays the role for Sansa that teen heartthrobs do for many adolescent girls, a safe exploration of their growing sexuality.

The idolization of teen idols typically begins in early adolescence when girls start to become interested in romance and dating and more aware of social norms which suggest that they should have romantic feelings for someone of the opposite sex (Simon, Eder, & Evans, 1992). Rather than dating in real life, developing a crush on a teen idol is a way for girls to acknowledge their emerging sexual feelings in a safe, non-threatening way (Engle & Kasser, 2005). Because teen boys are viewed by girls as only interested in sex (McRobbie, 1991), teen idols are a preferable option. Further, they often project a feminine form of masculinity that is sexually non-threatening and thus accessible to young girls (Engle &: Kasser, 2005; Karniol, 2001; McRobbie, 1991; Sweeney, 1994).

Bitten by Twilight: Youth Culture, Media, & the Vampire Franchise

One of the most popular ways people like to hate teenage girls is to complain about their “insane” crushes on boy band members. Now, let me fucking tell you something: those big dumb crushes are what helps a teenage girl develop her sexuality in a safe environment that she can control. In her world, she can listen to One Direction and hear all these songs about how great she is, and how much these cute non-threatening boys want to make her feel special. Why is this so important? Because no one is pushing them. There’s no fourteen year old boy shoving his clammy hands down your shirt without your consent. These fantasy boys are not convincing a girl to send naked pictures, only to show all their friends and call her a slut. In the fantasy land of boy bands, the girl has all the power. And we need to stop judging them for wanting to escape into that.

–Meghan Harper, “Why I Fucking Love Teenage Girls”

ASOIAF is a medieval-style world, so it of course doesn’t have pop idols and movie stars, but it does have tournaments and tourney champions, who play that role for the adolescent girls of Westeros. (And the boys, too. Consider Bran’s idolization of knights, especially the Kingsguard.) And Loras Tyrell is not just one of the best upcoming stars of the tourney scene, but he’s so dreamy handsome, young, and from one of the best families of Westeros. (Even Robert Baratheon crushes on him, in a manly way.)

Now, the fact that Loras is actually gay (as are so many teen heartthrobs - George Michael, we miss you) makes him even safer, whether Sansa consciously realizes it or not. This is all the more important, since because of the close circles of Westeros aristocracy, Sansa Stark has far more of a chance of personally interacting with Loras Tyrell than your typical teenage girl has with her most beloved Bieber or Zayn.

So when Sansa actually has the opportunity to meet Loras, is even led to believe she might marry him… the expression of her sexuality, while very real, is also very safe:

The sight of Ser Loras Tyrell standing on her threshold made Sansa’s heart beat a little faster.

Sansa was finding it hard to walk and talk and think all at the same time, with Ser Loras touching her arm.

I am talking to him, and he’s touching me, he’s holding my arm and touching me.

Desperately she tried to think of something clever and charming to say to him, but her wits had deserted her. She almost told him how beautiful he was, until she remembered that she’d already done that.

Ser Loras in white silk, so pure, innocent, beautiful. The dimples at the corner of his mouth when he smiled. The sweetness of his laugh, the warmth of his hand. She could only imagine what it would be like to pull up his tunic and caress the smooth skin underneath, to stand on her toes and kiss him, to run her fingers through those thick brown curls and drown in his deep brown eyes. A flush crept up her neck.

–ASOS, Sansa I

Or, for a visual representation:

Now, the trouble (or not?) is that this safe crush of Sansa’s is no longer something she can rely on. Whether it’s because of her aging into womanhood, or because of her actual experiences with sexuality – the dark masculine danger of Sandor Clegane, her marriage to Tyrion Lannister (including seeing him nude and sleeping next to him in bed for weeks), the explicit rape threats of Joffrey Baratheon and Marillion, the disturbing attentions and unfatherly kisses of Petyr Baelish – when she wishes to escape into her formerly favorite safe fantasy of Loras Tyrell, it twists away from her into something else:

Before she could summon the servants, however, Sweetrobin threw his skinny arms around her and kissed her. It was a little boy’s kiss, and clumsy. Everything Robert Arryn did was clumsy. If I close my eyes I can pretend he is the Knight of Flowers. Ser Loras had given Sansa Stark a red rose once, but he had never kissed her… and no Tyrell would ever kiss Alayne Stone. Pretty as she was, she had been born on the wrong side of the blanket.
As the boy’s lips touched her own she found herself thinking of another kiss. She could still remember how it felt, when his cruel mouth pressed down on her own. He had come to Sansa in the darkness as green fire filled the sky. He took a song and a kiss, and left me nothing but a bloody cloak.

–AFFC, Alayne II

Note that there are many analyses of “the unkiss” (link 1, link 2), Sansa’s imagined memory of being kissed by Sandor the night of the Blackwater, but what many point out is that it is again an attempt by Sansa of a safe fantasy, a subconscious attempt to control and understand and romanticize a frightening sexually-charged situation. It’s just several octaves away from her non-threatening fantasies of kissing and touching the “beautiful” Loras.

And though you say Sansa still holds this crush, please note that Loras is only mentioned in Sansa’s narrative once in AFFC (that scene above), where she recognizes that Loras’s attentions were nothing real, no kisses, just a rose. Also, when she thinks about the men who helped her in King’s Landing, Loras is not one of them. Furthermore, he’s not mentioned at all in her TWOW preview chapter – which, considering it focuses on an upcoming tourney and the young knights who wish to be its champions, should be a perfect occasion for the pretty knight Loras to stroll through Sansa’s head, and yet he does not.

So I would say that Sansa’s adolescent crush on Loras is something perfectly understandable… and also something she has outgrown. I hope that helps!

Sterek A-Z Challenge: one word prompts

Week 15: O - Oops

The bell over the coffee shop door announced Derek’s arrival with a merry jingle a little after 11 in the evening. Derek shuffled the strap of his messenger bag higher on his shoulder and shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his leather jacket.

The shop was almost empty at that hour. Only a few students writing their first papers of the new term and a couple of regular night owls were scattered through the shop. His usual seat in the far corner, where he could sit with his back against the wall and keep watch, was open.

Derek dropped his bag on the small table and shrugged his jacket off to drape over the back of his claimed seat. The young woman at the register was new, which could be potentially problematic. Derek didn’t recognize her, but she smiled cheerfully when he approached.

“What can I get you?” she chirped. Her heartbeat fluttered nervously as her scent sweetened with clear want. Definitely problematic.

Derek paused a moment. “I don’t know,” he answered honestly. He wasn’t sure his drink had a name.

“Oh, well, we have different speciality coffees and teas,” the barista said and gestured to the menu board behind her. “If you want something-”

“I got this!” Stiles slid out of the back room, arms flailing to keep his balance. “Yo,” he said, greeting Derek with a lazy salute, and Derek snorted. His roommate was ridiculous. “Super awesome Stilinski special as dark as your soul, coming right up.”

“Right,” Derek said, gravitating down the bar towards Stiles. “No cinnamon this time.”

“Sure thing.” Stiles flipped a large paper cup into the air and fumbled to catch it, which made Derek chuckle.

When Stiles called him earlier that year, it had been a bit of a shock. Derek had been living in a cabin upstate that he and Laura had bought years ago. He had finally achieved vengeance for his family when he ripped out Kate’s throat and burned her body deep in the woods, but Beacon Hills wasn’t home anymore, so he hadn’t gone back. Now he wished he had.

At first, Derek hadn’t been sure the small voice on the other end of the phone had actually been Stiles, and not something trying to lure him back to Beacon Hills because the Stiles on the other end of the line had been quiet, almost hesitant, and unsure. As if Stiles hadn’t believed he deserved Derek’s help. Definitely not at all the hyperactive, chatterbox he had left behind. They both carried heavy scars, but that was fine.

Before Derek knew it, he had a new roommate and was driving across the country to pick Stiles up the day he got his diploma. Stiles hadn’t been home since, and the Sheriff was worried.

The barista asked Derek what the drink was so she could ring it up as Stiles ducked out of sight to retrieve milk out of the fridge below the counter.

“I don’t know,” Derek said again. “Something chocolate?”

Derek always had the same drink whenever he came in, but he didn’t know what it was because Stiles had never told him. It probably didn’t have a name. The first time he picked Stiles up, Stiles had whipped something up and shoved it into his hands.

Stiles’ head popped back up over the espresso bar. The steamer hissed to life, and Stiles laughed. “Don’t worry about it, Sam. It’s on me,” he said and winked at Derek.

Derek hadn’t paid for a drink yet.

The drink Stiles handed off to Derek smelled overly sweet and chocolatey, and was piled so high with whipped cream drizzled with chocolate and caramel that the topping threatened to spill over. He wasn’t sure how Stiles knew about his sweet tooth, but he shouldn’t have been surprised.

“Here ya go, big guy,” Stiles said and grinned. “Extra sweet and fluffy. Just like you.”

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anonymous asked:

ur post about fic & racism in the supergirl fandom really got me thinking (especially about my own biases so thank you) but also like, how there’s this incredibly pervasive but subtle new form of racism I haven’t seen b4 in other fandoms? Like on one hand u have this loud condemnation of how racist monel is & how he was a slave owner blabh blah but no corresponding attention given to the existing Black characters. 1/4

I get wlw not wanting to write m/f fic but a lot of the fandom doesn’t reblog (or make) any of the gifsets, they don’t meta for him they don’t call for more screen time for Mehcad. Same for M’gann. SO many posts talking about how awful monel is compare him to Lena and strangely don’t mention the Black female character who also came from an oppressive society to become a hero? And there are like, idk, 4 people? Who write or post wlw fic with M’gann in it? 2/4

Same with Maggie. A huge segment of fandom decided Floriana is white (even tho hollywood clearly won’t cast her in roles for white women) so they use that as an excuse to exclusively stan the very light skinned white wlw. And the way it carries over to the characters, like, okay Flo is white? but Maggie is absolutely treated like a woc in how parts of fandom aggressively ignore her & find ways to demonize her character while overtly supporting lighter skinned characters ¾

And that same part of the fandom doesn’t ever seem to create content for Lucy or Vasquez either. IDK this isn’t something u can probably explore with stats but ur post really got me thinking and it just feels really gross now bc I see all these posts condemning racism but there’s still this extreme perpetuation of privileging white characters at the same time? & I haven’t seen this particular trend in fandom b4 4/4

Oh, anon, this made my day. I have a bunch of notes waiting in a doc to address the whole Mon-El thing with regard to the racist undertones and the rhetoric used by the show to frame his storyline, and I will do my best to write it before the season comes back again, because I genuinely think they tried to aim high and just … missed completely. (But I make no promises because my thesis defense is on Tuesday.)

To your first point re: fandom attitudes – I was surprised in the early half of S2 when so many people came out of the woodwork making posts in the main tag like “wait, why did they get rid of Kara/James??” because, oh right, nobody acted like they cared for almost twelve straight months. If y’all were so okay with this ship, where were you to acknowledge its social significance when it was canon? Where are you now? Why hasn’t there been an outpouring of tweets week after week at the execs and the writers for sidelining an interracial couple in favor of what we’re getting, especially since the storyline literally handwaved away human trafficking and slavery as minor plot points?

Not only that, when there’s unrealized potential for a non-canon ship there is typically an outpouring of fic in response, and while there’s been a statistically significant amount of new Karolsen fic in S2 because it’s pretty easy to top zero percent, the writing there is not keeping pace with any of the other dude-involved pairings. 

And you’re right, anon: it is not possible to prove anything with stats. HOWEVER, thanks to the addition of these new characters for S2, I *am* at the point now where it’s possible to see correlation between character race and fan engagement with different pairing choices. And the bias is there, whether it’s in the het pairings, the femslash, or even the m/m pairings. The whole reason I started tracking fic outputs in the first place was that any attempt to have this conversation last year devolved into yelling and finger-pointing because “you have no proof!” that racial bias is a thing. Except, yanno, all the POC who live with it daily saying that it’s a thing. Well, congratulations y’all: your choices leave digital footprints behind that are pretty easy to follow and chart for everyone to see.

This isn’t actually a new problem, by the way – racism and preferencing of white pairing happens a lot, in almost every fandom. The only difference maybe is that I’ve experimented with quantifying it, which is not something that people usually do when they study fandoms or fan behavior.

It pains me to no end that M’gann has been so overlooked, because her story has just as many dark character beats to it as Lena’s, if not more, plus the added bonus of her sharing a sense of “otherness” with Kara in a way that few other people can. And there is no way the disinterest in that pairing isn’t about race, because there are a whole bunch of ships from S1 between white women who’d never even met each other in canon that have more romantic fics than M’gann/anyone.

And the nonsense about Floriana, which I’ll remind everyone again was started by a white girl, had a demonstrable chilling effect on interest in Sanvers as a pairing. Like. I can actually show that on paper. And you’re absolutely right with what you said above, which bears repeating: Maggie is absolutely treated like a woc in how parts of fandom aggressively ignore her & find ways to demonize her character.

There’s also a treatment of Floriana herself that reminds me uncomfortably of how people went out of their way to demonize Naya Rivera’s personal life whenever she reminded the world she was black instead of just “very tan.” And a lot of the rhetoric people are using to talk about Floriana’s racial heritage is almost verbatim the same as what you’ll find on white supremacist discussion boards about Italian people. I’d love to think this is an accident, but I’ve made some people pretty angry for pointing this out in the past, so I suspect it’s at least partially deliberate.

Lucy was another case that drove me insane, for two reasons:

  1. The vast majority of femslash fans flat-out ignored her as a romantic choice even though there were a whole lot of good reasons to ship her with either Kara or Alex, and a whole lot less negative reasons not to. (And it’s not like Supercat was already dominating the scene before Lucy’s character was introduced. That ship only became popular after the movie Carol came out during the winter hiatus of S1.)
  2. People had the same fight last year about whether or not Lucy counted as a WOC and ultimately insisted that the answer was no. But then people kept on ignoring her anyway like somehow dubiously legal boss/employee relationships, potential treason, and incest were more logical bases for attraction.

Also, to the people who have been like “oh yay we could’ve had Dichen as Maggie, a real WOC” like somehow this would have made the fandom love her more – you’re full of shit. If you mean that, why has there been so little fic about Dichen as Roulette? Like, last year there were a whole bunch of shipfics featuring Livewire. There was Kara/Siobhan. And yet … no dark scenarios of Supergirl/Roulette? No Alex ones? There were even a bucketload of those for each Danvers sister + Max Lord, and this fandom isn’t even that into dudes. You’re telling me no one is interested in this kind of hero/villain dynamic with the Asian chick and somehow that’s not also about race?

tl;dr I suspect that a decent chunk of this problem is the result of subconscious bias, but some of it’s not. And what’s really sad about it is that, for all the talk on Tumblr about representation being important, we’re really doing no better as media producers than Hollywood when it comes to race. If anything, we might actually be doing worse.

Do Something Bad, Too - Part 4

Pairing: Alpha!Bucky x Omega!Reader

Summary: It’s like every single Alpha on the planet won’t rest until they’ve confessed their eternal wish for you to mother their children, and it’s getting old. Luckily, that’s a problem Bucky might be able to fix.

Warnings: language, a/b/o dynamics, nsfw content (aka orgasms)

A/N: its finally here! sorry for taking like 30000 years but i got there in the end! happy new year, happy holidays, i hope everyone is well and i hope you enjoy this part!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

When you were in the army, you decided that you would never, ever chose an Alpha as a mate. You were surrounded by the worst kind day in day out - and, sure, when you moved companies nobody knew you were an omega thanks to the suppressants, but that just meant they felt like they could say all their shitty opinions about omegas in front of you as if you wouldn’t be offended.

In your opinion, 99% of Alphas were pigs and had zero respect for you no matter how successful you were, or how many suppressants you took. The past few weeks, however, have made you seriously reconsider that percentile.

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Omegaverse with omega blue bby because i’m weak

  • Eveyone is alpha except, of course, Lance and Pidge. 
  • So, you know, there’s too many alpha hormones going on in the castle and sometimes is just to much. Even Pidge, who hasn’t presented yet, is sometimes overwhelmed.
  • They think Lance is a beta.
  • Allura may be their Princess but Shiro is the official leader of the pack. This causes lots of trouble between them. Allura and Shiro respects each other, but when they disagree, is fucking hell in the ship.
  • Keith is really in touch with his instincs. Which is bad and good at the same time. Is perfecto for battle, but it also causes a lot of drifts between him and his teammates. He can’t help but try to fight Shiro’s commands, but the older alpha always wins and obliges him to submit.
  • Hunk is crazy strong, and Shiro is thankfull the paladin has a peaceful nature because there’s no way he could make him submit. If Hunk wanted it, he could be the alpha leader. But that’s not what his heart desire. Instead of using his ‘alpha-ness’ to lead, he uses it to break the fights between Shiro and Allura when they get to bad or to face enemies in order to protect others. 
  • Coran, even though he’s an alpha, submits easily to his princess and the paladins. Not really caring about things like fighting over control. No, he’s happy where he is. Taking care of everyone else.
  • Pidge doesn’t have her own scent yet, so Shiro has to nuzzle her like a pup to leave his own scent on her and make her smell like pack. 

                                     —(more under cut )— 


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Writing daily-life stuff in Japan: Food

Considering how much fanfiction gets written set in Japan. I thought I might just share some daily life details that may or may not be useful. 

This comes from my own experiences of living in a bicultural household and living in the country for about a month every year of my life. Admittedly, I’ve only lived in a deep rural area and visited cities, but some of the pointers will still be relevant.

The first thing that come to mind when you’re trying to describe another place is to get to grips with the food culture.You know the saying, ‘To know a people, know the food that they’d willingly consume’? So, for this post, I’m going to talk about food details.

1. Food that you might have in the fridge: Old rice if you made rice in bulk + various rice toppings. Think of rice as the bread, and the fridge being full of the spreads you could put on it. 

Pickles: Might not be so popular with the younger generation, but if they live with their parents, there will bound to be at least one kind of pickle in the fridge, because there are speciality pickles for almost every prefecture and you cannot escape them. In the same way as spreads, they usually taste very strong and its rare to eat them as they are, unless they’re just that tasty and you like pickles that much (think of somebody eating peanut butter with a spoon straight out of the jar). You would eat pickles with white rice. Here are three examples: Umeboshi - pickled plum, and it is sour and very salty! You can suck on stone for minutes afterwards, just savouring the salt taste. Usually one plum is sufficient for one bowl of rice. Takuwan - a smelly, giant horseradish pickle, which might look a bit yellow with age. When you see giant horseradishes drying in the sun around the back of the house, this is probably what they’re going to be made into. Rakkyo - little pickled onions. 

Other toppings: Shirasu - tiny little white fish, each fish is about two centimetres long, and you sprinkle (or heap them, if you really like them) over rice. Delicious. Again, may not be popular with the younger generations who have grown up accustomed to more Western flavours.  Gohandesuyo - seaweed paste in a jar. It’s salty like Marmite and like Marmite the name of the food is the name of the brand. You put a tablespoon or so on one bowl of rice. 

Spring onions. We are never out of spring onions. Ever. Chopped up fine.

Sauces: Soy sauce, mirin, su (rice wine vinegar), yakiniku sauce (sauce specifically for yakiniku), mayonnaise, yakisoba sauce, ketchup, mustard in a tube, wasabi in a tube.

A tub of miso: of which there are red and white variants, and there is constant family clash over which tastes better!

If the household eats bread, you’re more likely to get a vegetable oil spread than butter. I think a few years ago there was a butter shortage. It was just too expensive to buy or not on the shelves, but there were so many different brands of vegetable spread made from different flower seeds! 

Egg is a fridge staple. If you’re in doubt and you need a quick breakfast or lunch, you could crack an egg raw over hot rice, spritz a dash of soy sauce on top, shovel it down and go.

Natto - fermented beans, its sticky and when you pull it apart it stretches with sticky web-like strands just like melted cheese. It’s famously an acquired taste but I love it on rice, in curry and in miso soup. Sold in wee cups, with sachets of sauce and mustard.

Also in the pantry: Katsuobushi - tuna flakes, often used to make tuna stock; Stick dashi - powdered stock, usually seaweed or tuna; wakame - seaweed; ginger; taka no tsume - dried hot chilli peppers, prettily named ‘hawk talons’; sesame seeds; sesame oil. Furikake - literally, ‘sprinkles’ for rice, when you have no other option. Maybe tofu. Panko for frying things. Golden curry roux blocks. Cream stew insta-kits.

Instant foods: Cup ramen, cup noodles, instant ramen, instant yakisoba, freeze-dried instant soups, instant corn soup.

The primary oil used for cooking is so-called ‘salad oil’: I don’t actually know what it’s made of, but it’s a vegetable oil of some kind.

2. Where I might buy food: Supermarkets for the fruit, veg, meat and fish, but for the best read-made fare, drinks and snack foods (kashi pan, onigiri, yoghurt, and depending on where you go there might be salads and bentos), you would head to a 24/7 open convenience store (e.g. Seven-Eleven, Lawsons’), where they also might do hot steamed pork buns and, lately, really good coffee to go. If you want to buy somebody a nice cake or box of tea-time sweets as an omiyage you might go to the basement floor of a department store. 

Vending machines - there is a vending machine everywhere. I am not kidding. Even in the deep countryside, I found a couple of vending machines up a mountain which smelled as if they had been scent-marked by raccoon dogs and bears. And at these vending machines, you can not only buy cold juice, but several different kinds of hot and cold Japanese teas, a very sweet milk tea, several different brands of hot and cold coffees, corn soup, potato chowder, hot shiruko (a sweet azuki drink), hot chocolate, hot and cold lemon…You’d honestly never go thirsty.

For sushi, we’d call up a sushi restaurant. The same goes for ramen. Unless you’re using an instant ramen kit, making ramen broth is hard. The tonkotsu variant is pretty much impossible at home. Likewise, you just can’t make good sushi at home. It’s not really a family meal or something that can be casually made. Typically sushi is brought out for celebrations or special occasions as it can be quite pricey but conveyor belt sushi places are more accessible.  

3. Bread: You will find white bread (fluffy, gorgeous, pillowy white bread, that’s basically like cake) but it’s really difficult to find brown bread. In the rural supermarket, it was non-existent and for bread with a crust, you’d have to go to the little street-corner artisan bakeries.

On the topic of bread and kashipan, I’ve often seen references in fanfiction of characters baking kashipan for each other, or kashipan just like their grandmother made it (e.g. anpan, melonpan, creampan). As much I like the sentiment behind these scenes, I’m not saying they’re impossible, but in most cases they are a little jarring. 

Our grandmother’s generation were not bakers. Most of the houses that our grandmothers grew up in did not have ovens, since Japan doesn’t have a tradition of domestic baking, and even now, a lot of houses still don’t have ovens aside from a nifty little oven toaster, Cakes and kashipan were seen as Western and trendy luxuries to be eaten at cafes (a Western import in itself) or bought from specialist shops which had the equipment to make them. They weren’t ‘casual home-cooking’ so to speak, even if the history of the anpan and the castella date pretty far back into the past now. 

Even now, unless you are a massive kashipan fanatic and dessert-making enthusiast, you probably wouldn’t bake a tray of kashipan at home when you could buy them perfectly made from a nearby convenience store. 

Having said that, I have tried making anpan in an oven toaster. I made six, since that was all that could fit on the little toaster tray. They were each about 6cm in diameters, and my grandmother complained that it was a waste of perfectly good azuki. 

You can, if you’re really into dessert making, make lots of things in an oven toaster, but if you’re looking to make something sentimental just like your grandmother made them, mochi might be a better option (e.g. warabimochi or ohagi), or maybe since sweet things historically tended to be more often bought from a specialist than made at home, quote a favourite wagashi that grandmother might have enjoyed from a particular shop e.g. the anko dama and imo youkan from Funawa; the chestnut manju from the shop by the station.   

4. Omiyage: If you go away on a trip and you’re inconveniencing work colleagues with your absence (which you are), this is the souvenir that you buy to take back and share at your work place, often a food item, so boxes of sweets are often packaged in such a way that the sweets inside are individually wrapped for ease of splitting distribution. 

This is also the word used for the gifts you bring back for family, either when you’re visiting relatives and you know that you will be encroaching upon their hospitality, potentially inconveniencing them, or if you’re coming back to the family and, in a way, again, it’s to make up for any inconveniences that might have been caused by absence  -although largely for family, it’s also about the joy of giving to those you care about!

Likewise, students who go away on holiday on a trip might bring back omiyage for fellow members of their club, if they’re involved in club activities. If you think of club activities as training children up for work place social structure and customs, it makes some sense. 

Not omiyage but an example of gift-giving, but if you move into a new neighbourhood, it’s usually expected that you visit your neighbours and take round gifts, as a gesture of courtesy and goodwill. There is, again, an element of asking forgiveness for inconvenience, because moving into the new home would have made a lot of noise and possibly caused a disturbance. 

With omiyage in mind, each prefecture tends to advertise certain foods/sweets that are ‘unique’ to it that would make suitable omiyage. A famous example would be ‘Tokyo Banana’ and anything matcha from the Uji area in Kyoto. 

5. Food is seasonal: Japan is hyperconscious of its seasons, so the fridge will likely contain seasonal fruits and veg. In a lot of Japanese poems, it was traditional to include a ‘kigo’, a word that encodes a season to set the poem in without explicitly saying ‘It is winter’, and some fruits are kigo. The persimmon is a kigo for autumn, peaches and cherries and plums for spring, and more recently the watermelon is a definite kigo for summer! Seasonal fruits also make good gifts for visiting friends’ houses, especially if you’re bringing them back from the countryside after visiting relatives. 

Autumn’s a great time for food. Now is the time when all of the mushrooms are coming out - shiitake, matsutake, enoki, shimeji - and they’re dried and preserved for the year. People who cook might have dried shiitake in the pantry for rehydrating and eating or using in stock. 

Foreign brands, aware of the seasonal sensitivity of their Japanese, often produce Japan only seasonal limited products. My favourite example of this is the Haagen-Daaz flavours. One autumn there was a pumpkin and cinnamon, and I’m pretty sure I saw a cherry blossom latte at Starbucks.

6. Food you might see at festival stalls: Taiyaki - fish-shaped pastries made with a pancake-like batter and filled with custard or azuki. Yakisoba - fried noodles. Yakitori - chicken skewers. Takoyaki - octopus batter balls. Hot dogs…With a shout-out to very rare diversity my local festival had a Turkish kebab stall last year. Kakikoori for the summer festivals - sweet ice, with typical syrups being red, green and yellow (strawberry, melon and lemon flavours respectively).

 …..and that’s enough for now I think. (21/9/2016)

BTS Dishes About Their US Tour, Songwriting Process, & Onstage Style

K-Pop fans worldwide are obsessed with chart-topping musical sensation BTS – made up by Rap Monster, Jin, SUGA, V, J-Hope, Jimin, and Jungkook –  and not without great cause. The guys’ songs transcend languages, and resonate with listeners all over the world. TWIST caught up with the band during their latest tour of the United States to ask all about their experiences traveling the world, their musical influences, and what it’s like getting recognized by fans. Check out our exclusive Q&A below.

TWIST: What are you most excited about for your return to the US?

BTS: The size of the tour got much bigger than last time we were in the US back in 2015. It’s almost 10-fold this time. 5 arena shows in 3 cities sold out in less than 5 minutes! We’re amazed by the fact fans in the USA are passionate and supportive and we’re super excited to come back to meet them all.

TWIST: What is the most exciting part of touring around the world, and what has been the most challenging so far?

BTS: The most exciting part of touring around the world is that you get the unique opportunity to meet different people from various background. Regardless of their differences, they sing BTS songs in unison and cheer for us, and it is very special experience for all of the band. On the other hand, the most challenging part has been the life on the road, being far away from our family and friends for weeks.

TWIST: Which of your songs are you most looking forward to performing on this part of the tour?

Rap Monster: “Spring Day.” I wrote the main melody for the lead single for the first time and also wrote lyrics.

SUGA: “Spring Day.” I wrote main lyrics based on my personal experience with old friends. It is about my sad memories with him and it makes me sentimental whenever I listen to the song.

Jungkook: “Not Today.” It has the coolest beat of all songs in the album and I personally like the choreography for the song.

J Hope: “FIRE.” It has always been my favorite and the song has all the essence of BTS can show to the audience on stage.

TWIST: What’s the best piece of advice you’ve gotten in your career?

Rap Monster: “If you’re tied up with not gaining approval from others, you’ll never be able to move forward.”

TWIST: How would you say you and your sound have evolved over the years since first forming the group?

BTS: BTS sound has evolved since our debut in 2013 but has rooted its music in western pop music and hip-hop. We try to adapt all the hottest trends in pop music scene and that’s why fans around the world like it despite the cultural differences. All members listen to different genres of music all the time, from EDM, hip-hop, R&B to hip-house… and we believe BTS is kind of creating a new category of music genre beyond K-Pop.

TWIST: Do you remember the first song you ever wrote, what it was about, and what inspired you to write it?

Rap Monster: I don’t remember the name of the song, but there was an online community of amateur rappers who gathered together. I downloaded a beat from another amateur beat maker and I wrote a song based off of that. The song didn’t really make much sense, I just wrote it using every hard word I possibly knew. I actually found the song 2 years ago on my computer and listened to it thinking “What is this?” It was a mess.

TWIST: Have you ever written a song in a strange or unusual place? Or been inspired by something totally random?

Rap Monster: So many, I think I wrote a song while I was at the Grand Canyon in 2009. I had a trip to Vegas/Grand Canyon and I think I wrote a song there because I was shocked by the scenery. I definitely don’t remember what it was about though.

TWIST: Who are some artists that you would love to collaborate with?

BTS: There are so many artists we would love to collaborate with, such as Drake, J Cole, Justin Bieber… The list goes on and on.

TWIST: Which other artists/songs are on your personal playlists?

BTS: Drake “Fake Love”, The 1975, Kehlani, Lorde.

TWIST: How would you describe your personal fashion senses?

BTS: It’s mix of gothic and Japanese street wear. My recent favorite brands are WTAPS, Neighborhood and Yoji Yamamoto.

TWIST: And how does your personal style differ from the costumes you wear onstage?

BTS: Onstage clothing for BTS is custom-made to maximize our performance while being matched with the concept of each song.

TWIST: What is it like when fans recognize you on the street/ask for photos? Is it crazy? Surreal? Overwhelming?

Rap Monster: It’s a really nice experience to have somebody who knows me, but sometimes I like to be alone and hang around the city. I think it depends on the situation. There are some situations that I want to not be noticed by others, but people easily notice me. I’ve been told that I’m too unique (my walk and my clothes) and I’m easy to recognize, and I think that’s really nice. If I’m an artist or an idol and nobody knows me that would be sad.

TWIST: Can you share a fun fact about one of your other band members that you don’t think even the most dedicated fans will know?

Rap Monster: Many people think that SUGA is like the Grandfather of the group, but he acts more like a little kid. Jimin is the opposite, he looks like a baby but inside he’s mature and like a Grandfather.

© Kristine Hope Kowalski @ Twist Magazine

So the other day I got this message in my inbox:

“What if ji and ksoo were to see the sexual and erotic stuff you shippers write/post about them? Just imagine how it makes them feel. As two men who are just friends it could make them really uncomfortable and they probably think its disrespectful too smh”

Rather than replying straight to this person and being petty, throwing shade and ready to fight like I usually am….I figured I’d reply with this nice and calm well thought out post since this subject comes up often with Kaisoo and I feel like this possibility needs a bit of exploration. :)

*****DISCLAIMER******: As everyone should know by now, I am a kaisoo supporter and this post is mainly to break down misconceptions in relation to them only. In other words, I am not speaking for other pairings/ships that arent Kaisoo. This is solely my perception and view on this so no shade will be tolerated. I edited this both on my laptop and my phone so idk if the “read more” shyt appeared…dont shoot me. The names of Kaisoo have been abbreviated to eliminate appearing in their respective tags. This post is also not to condone or promote the sharing of sexually explicit forms of shipping directly with the artists involved. (i.e messaging it to them on social media, mailing it to them, shouting things like “how hard does ji f*ck you” to ksoo in person, etcetera etcetera blah blah yada yada)

So, EXO debuted in 2012.

This makes about 4 years since they have been active in the industry.
Kaisoo shippers began noticing their interactions way before EXO’s debut.
Then, this airport photo that was released to the public was one of the first ones that showed how intimate they were with one another:

This pre debut photo was also leaked along with others, some of which were noted to have been much more intimate:

Eerily, these intimate photos vanished after EXO’s debut and are currently nowhere to be found online.

Anyway…moving on. :)


So we know that the kaisoo ship began its first stages of sailing around 2010-late 2011, before EXO’s debut.
Throughout all 4 years of EXO being active, both JI and KS have maintained steady and intimate interactions with one another. There were only two major periods during these 4 years of which the two seemed to be more distant around each other than usual. (There are many theories about this, research more if you’re interested.)

Simultaneously within these 4 years, the kaisoo pairing grew to become one of the longest and most popular pairings in EXO, to the point where it not only became one of EXO’s main pairings but one of the most popular pairings within the Korean idol industry as a whole.

That’s a lot of popularity, right?
I hope you are following along.

“Kaisoo” is what international fans use to refer to “KAI” and “KyungSOO” being paired.
However, in Korea, they are referred to as “KADI”

“KADI” is written as “카디 ” in hangul.
Below is a screencap from an interview for EXO’s 2nd box dvd that included both JI and KS, released in 2015:

As you can see, they both seem to be well informed about their Korean couple name, “Kadi”.

Okay, so what does this mean? Just cuz they know the name doesnt mean they’ve seen what fans draw of them! It should be kept private!

This brings me to my next point.
Again, KADI written in hangul is 카디.
One of Korea’s most popular search engines is “NAVER. It is Korea’s equivalent to GOOGLE in the US. More than 25 million people in South Korea have used NAVER.
NAVER has also collaborated with and sponsored many EXO related things both past and present.

I searched for 카디 in NAVER, and this is what came up:

On almost every page, there were drawings of JI and KS that were intimate and very erotic.

So, this leads me to my final point.


If we look at the timeline and how the kaisoo ship started before debut, it grew to be one of the most popular ships, they both know about their ship name and that erotic images show up when you search their name on NAVER (we could even factor in that JI has had an instagram in the past and that KS has been rumoured to have a private one)…then one could only conclude that the chance of them already having seen and possibly even read what fans have created about them is pretty high.

In short, I know a lot of you want to protect JI and KS and make sure that things like this stay private and out of their reach, but I am 99% sure that its too late for that and they have already seen these things.

I also don’t feel like protection is needed, though, and its because of this reason. If we can conclude that within 4 years they had to have been exposed to “erotic kaisoo fanart/fiction” then we can also conclude that there is a possibility that they aren’t bothered by it too much.

The reason for this once again goes back to the timeline. We know that the kaisoo pairing has been around since 2010. We also know there is a possibility they both knew about their pairing. 

 Hypothetically, lets say that I am and idol and found out that fans were looking at my interactions with another idol and creating sexual imagery out of these reactions and I don’t like it. My first reaction to limit this would be to reduce how much I interact with this person in the public eye. Less touching, less whispering, less laughing and being seen together. Whether fanservice or just normal interaction, if me being shipped with this person made me uncomfortable, the interaction with them would slow down. 

 But Kadi’s interactions with one another didn’t slow down until almost 2 years after debut, which would lead one to come to the conclusion that A.) They are not bothered by being paired with one another, and B.) The reactions slowed down for a reason other than them being uncomfortable with shipping.

I’m pretty sure they’re bothered and just feel like they can’t say anything cuz of SM!!

This is a possibility, but again not very likely. Remember not too long ago when Chanyolk put up that long post on instagram after people found out he started following a specific female idol? And we all know about how vocal Amburr has been lately about ef ex as well. KS was able to politely communicate that he no longer needs gifts from fans, so its safe to say that if shipping him with JI was an issue that would have been conveyed somehow too.

There is also so much evidence from Kaisoo themselves clearly showing how shipping doesnt seem to make them uncomfortable.

We have the sticker set that JI used on his phone. This sticker set was made by and given to him by a fansite:

In this sticker set there were drawings of JI by himself, JI with animals and KS drawings, but not any other member/idol. This also shows that, once again, kaisoo had been shipped by the public for a long time, giving them the likely hood of knowing about it. 

There are  also lots of videos in which you can see both JI and KS smiling at banners of which their ship name had appeared:

And then there is the eery coincidence of JI mentioning that one of his favorite songs was “Montreal” by the weekend, 4 years after it was used in a FMV for a kaisoo fanfic called “Arbitrage”:



Has he read the actual fic? Most likely not. But its possible he may have seen seen the FMV which included clips of him with KS as well.

I want to reiterate agian that this post is not to say that its okay to post sexual works of idol pairings in places that they will see it. Of course it should stay among shippers only. What Im saying is that on a website like tumblr, an idol from south Korea is not likely to see what shippers post and even still, because there are shippers who share things externally and search engines exist…there is the possibility that an idol has already seen what you’re trying to keep from them.


Whether you choose to acknowledge it or not, shipping is and always has been apart of the kpop industry. We know it, the companies know it and idols know it too.


With the internet being such an open way of communicating and sharing things for so many people, its only a matter of time before some nsfw shipping art is leaked on a platform that makes it more accessible to idols. But this is not something that you can blame shipping itself(especially when it is encouraged) or the MAJORITY of shippers for. The majority of us are not sending our NSFW kaisoo art and fics directly to KS and JI themselves. It was even Kaisoo shippers themselves who used our voices to stop the film adaptation of Anterograde Tomorrow in an effort to protect Kaisoo. The majority of us are just talking among ourselves on exclusive and private platforms and sharing our imagination in the form of art.


Every now and then someone may leak things that should have been kept private. But that is an issue for THOSE shippers, not shippers and shipping as a whole. There are good and not so good people in all fandoms, and there is nothing wrong with artistic expression among fans.


So in short, to answer your question…I (clearly) wonder sometimes if Kaisoo has seen what things shippers post about them all the time. I do acknowledge the possibility that they also may have seen these works. I do wonder how it makes them feel, but I also know that they are adults and if they do feel uncomfortable or if they feel its disrespectful they will tell us/show us in their own way and we don’t have to worry about protecting them from things like this. :)

Opposites Attract - Tom Holland Oneshot

Request: Anonymous - Hey I just got an idea for u for an imagine. Now if ur to busy to do it that’s cool I don’t want to stress u out with a whole bunch of imagines, but maybe a tom holland one where you’re dating and people don’t understand why because ur like polar opposites. ( btw ur imagines are some of the best I have read keep up the good work 😁😊❤️ ) 

 Warnings: Fluff, feeling uneasy

 Word Count: 1,298

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

 A/N: Hope you guys liked it. More stuff will be posted soon. :)


To most people if they saw you and Tom together, they’d stop and question you because you two are completely different. Nothing alike. See but that’s the thing, being polar opposites is what makes your relationship unique. You and Tom have more ways to expand on it and get different ideas from each other. Sure it bother’s you when a total stranger comments on your love life, but you never let it bother you, neither does Tom.

“Mmmm morning love” Toms morning voice was honestly one of your guilty pleasures. There was something about it that made it seem sexy.

“Morning” You fluttered your eyes open to see the sight of the man you love laying next to you. It was the best part of waking up in your opinion.

“So what’s our plan for today?” He pulled you closer to his chest.

“I thought we could just stay here forever” You cuddled against him.

“And waste a perfectly good day” He laughed.

“Yeah” You nodded.

“As great as that sounds we have to get ready for work love” He kissed your temple. You sighed. “Fine”.

The both of you got up and proceeded with your daily morning routines. Nothing the two of you did was the same. One of you would have tea while the other one would have coffee in the mornings. It almost amazed people how you two ended up being together.


“Good morning everyone” You and Tom greeted everyone once you got to the set. You got a few “hellos” and good mornings" back.

You and Tom were practically beaming with so much energy ready to start another day of work. No one new how, but it was almost as if you two sort of fueled the other one to be able to function properly.

Keep reading

Day 1: My room turned into a ocean. I swear I found fishes and sharks swarming into my lungs. Or maybe that was the remains of you trying not to escape but desperately needing to
Day 2: You weren’t at school today and I should’ve been happy, I was more sad
Day 3: I thought I was ready to move on, then I saw you with her.
Day 4: We haven’t spoken in days now. My mind thinks its being shoved off a cliff.
Day 5: I wish it would just hit the bottom
Day 6: This will be the first weekend we dont hang out. I know you’ll be seeing her and I know youll be smiling without me. I’m trying hard to learn how to too
Day 7: I asked you for help on a history assignment and you replied with “Ask Amber im busy”. I texted back: “Tell Emma I said hi”
Day 8: You posted a video with her on the only social media site you have. When I saw it I erupted. I spewed lava every where, oh god its every where
Day 9: My mom made me sleep next to her on the couch. She was afraid I would try and do something like I did two years ago when another guy tore up my heart. I actually had thought about it
Day 10: I slept in your sweatshirt one last time so i can feel myself engulfed in you. I know you wanted them back so I had to feel you and smell you one last time.
Day 11: I gave you all of your stuff back and you thought I looked like a warrior but really I went home and tried getting you out of my bloodstream
Day 12: when will my eyes stop flowing?
Day 13: I snuck out with a boy and smoked weed on his couch. He talked about love and how much it hurt. I only pictured you.
Day 14: I woke up next to that same boy and I woke up screaming. The boy was worried and confused but I knew why I screamed. I imagined you laying with another girl on your couch. I ran out of his house so fast you’d think Id be better at running from you.
Day 15: Its spring break and im with my best friend and your with her and i swear i can feel you tracing her spine the way you used to trace mine
Day 16: I ignored your birthday and it felt worse than the puking i did that night
Day 17: Im treading icy water while you’re swimming away from me, I guess I just hope you’ll loop around and find your way back to the shattered, but still there, us
Day 18: I don’t remember the sound of your voice I don’t remember the color of your eyes I don’t remember your the taste of your lips
Day19: No amount of screaming gets your name out of my head
Day 20: I got on a plane today and when we took off I swear i almost walked to the door and started flying
Day 21: They say it takes 21 days fo break a habit but I think I just manage to fall more in love with a greedy monster
Day 22: I saw you today and wished you a happy late birthday and promised we’d watch the third Hobbit together. I’m beginning to hate myself more
Day 23: Its the end of the month maybe next month won’t be filled with thoughts of you and killing myself. i think im beginning to be over you
Day 24: april fools
Day 25: i think i understand now. when you first told me you loved me your mouth curled up on the edges, two days before you left when i gave my bare self to you your mouth was a straight line when saying i love you
Day 26: if you’re trying to kill me its working
Day 27: i woke up this morning to my blankets and pillows piled in a corner in my room. its something s ghost would do to make his presence known. im haunting myself. or maybe its the ghost of us tsking over my body
Day 28: its almost been a month since you told me it was never me. i almost texted you happy easter but i saw those text messages and just got angry
Day 29: I hate that you act like you didnt break my heart. i hate that you think im fine that im not writing a shit poem sbout your shit personality
Day 30: thirty days since you’ve wanted me. thirty days since i told you i love you. thirty days since you’ve slipped from my fingers. i tried catching you. you’ve been gone far too long. thirty days is too long
Day 31: i had a nightmare last night about you. you told me you loved me and kissed my forehead. i woke up breathing heavily and shaking. i want you out of my life
Day 32: running on no sleep isn’t fun
Day 33: ive been awake for over 50 hours in fear that ill see you in my dreams again. i cant risk that. it hurts so much. get out of my head
Day 34: my mother told me that love will do this. that its cruel and torturous and breaks you into such little pieces not even yourself can pick up all the pieces. you know where they all are, please come back and pick them up
Day 35: i talked to another guy last night we stayed up late and he asked me questions about you. we were sober so it wasn’t easy spitting up vowels and similies and euphemisms explaining the empty feeling in my chest after you left
Day 36: fuck if i stopped seeing you everyday i swear id be over you.
Day 37: my knee didnt touch your leg like it used it i promise i didnt do that fuck
Day 38: you told me that the wrinkles on my leg bothered you when i sat down. thats not what you said when we were trying not to get caught in the back of your car
Day 39: you told me you’d take me to prom and in two days itll just be another day you promised to spend with me. its funny how our plans turned to dust in a matter of seconds after cleaning
Day 40: the thunderstorm of us was inside of you and maybe that why it felt so close. i keep counting the seconds between the boom and light hoping you arent moving away buy i fear that you are already letting others feel your storm. the plants you grew are dying. maybe you should come back to water them
Day 41: ten days since its been a month since you left. i cried at prom because all i could look for in the crowd was you.
Day 42: i got so drunk all i could see was your face. the guy i fucked kept telling me his name wasn’t yours. i just screamed and cried because you’re all i still think about despite your efforts to continue to push me away
Day 43: i should be getting high today but if i do ill just write more and think more about a guy who will never care
Day 44: i think im trying to gain feelings for someone else because it’ll make moving on from you easier. im afraid to write that it hasnt
Day 45: you traces my leg like you used to. it was like dandelion tea. it made my insides fill with happiness. you’re my yellow paint.
Day 46: Van Gogh used to eat yellow paint because he thought it would put happiness inside him. He would consume it everyday in the hopes that it would bring his sadness to rest despite the fact that it could kill him first. i gues you were my yellow paint emphasis on the were. see im not going to write about you anymore, because when i write you down im under the impression that you’ll stay with the words but you don’t. this is the last sentence I’ll ever write about you

Cardiovascular Palpitations Pt. 2 (ft. Jeongguk) [M]

Originally posted by nnochu

→ fluff, smut, angst, really fuckign fluffy smut 10k
→ friends with benefits au, doctors au ft Taehyung
part 1 | part 2 | story talk

Yay! This was super cute but I’m seriously so glad its over lol I didn’t edit so its not my best work but it’s officially the longest thing I’ve ever written so I hope you like it! Let me know what you think, and I’ll be uploading a story talk and drabbles about this au soon! 

Keep reading

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #161 - Star Trek Beyond

(GIF originally posted by @forquicksilver)

Spoilers Below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: Yes.

Was it a movie I saw since August 22nd, 2009: Yes. #440

Format: Blu-ray

1) The preproduction for this film was slightly troubled. JJ Abrams was committed to Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens so co-writer of the first two films Robert Orci signed on as director. He ended up leaving production though, taking his cinematographer with him, and it was a little while before Justin Lin (Fast and the Furious 3 - 6) was hired to replace him. Writers Simon Pegg and Doug Jung reportedly wrote the script in a bit of a hurry as they still had a release date to meet. But at the end the film turned out really well, so everything worked out in the end.

2) This film was released during the 50th anniversary of the Star Trek franchise.

Originally posted by lovely-trek

Having said that, the work done by writers Pegg and Jung as well as Lin’s direction I think help to make the film feel like a balance between old Trek and new Trek. I’ll get into more details on that as I go along.

3) The opening scene.

Originally posted by readysteadytrek

The opening has an incredible sense of fun and humor to it (with the aliens Kirk is trying to break peace with seemingly gigantic and ending up being the size of a chihuahua) and honestly feels like it could be the concept of an episode for the original “Star Trek” TV show (says the guy who’s never seen an episode of the original series). It establishes some of the lighter/funner tone this film will feature compared to the titular darkness of Into Darkness as well as Kirk’s initial conflict in the film. It is a wonderful beginning.

4) Kirk’s tiredness.

Originally posted by sci-fiworld

Kirk is three years into his five year mission in space (which, in a not-so-coincidental-way, is how long the original series got before cancellation) and it is starting to weigh on him.

Kirk [in his captain’s log]: “As for me things have started to feel a little…episodic.”

Originally posted by wish-for-the-moon

There’s no direction in space, it is just infinite and that is starting to weigh on Kirk. It has him questioning the point of it all. It has him questioning who he is.

Kirk [after commenting he’s now a year older on his birthday]: “A year older than [my father] got to be. He joined Starfleet because he believed in it. I joined on a dare.”

Bones: “You joined to see if you could live up to him. [Mentions how Kirk has spent all this time trying to be like his dad.] Now you’re wondering what it means to be Jim.”

And it is through the fire of conflict in this film that Kirk will reclaim his identity and who exactly he is.

5) The release of this film was given an unexpected dose of sorrow as actor Anton Yelchin tragically passed away about a month before the film’s release.

Originally posted by acebodhi

There is a scene early in the film where Bones and Kirk drink some Scotch they found in Chekov’s locker. They pour three glasses, the third one being for “absent friends” (as in those we’ve lost who could not be here now). The absent friend I believe was meant to be Kirk’s later father, who the pair are talking about. But in the wake of Anton Yelchin’s passing the scene takes on a much more somber meaning and feels more like a tribute to him. After the film’s release I read on IMDb that the scene was included to pay tribute to Yelchin, but I can no longer find that piece of trivia suggesting it may have been false. Either way, it is impossible to divorce Chekov from that scene or the unintended tribute it pays to the late actor. I’m going to miss seeing you in the movie, Anton.

Originally posted by captainprincesskk

Originally posted by marcusspector

6) Yorktown.

Originally posted by whichisnone

Yorktown is quite possibly the stand out new element introduced into the film. The space station/outpost/colony/whatever is visually outstanding. Most space stations in film are defined by rigid edges and sharp boundaries but Yorktown is circular. It’s fluid, it’s organic, it moves into and through each other like a planet. Some of the camera tricks and technical aspects used to show off this new location is great. It also has an incredible atmosphere to it which ties directly into the sense of hope this franchise is all about. The air is clean, the sky is bright, multiple alien species are working in unity, and Giacchino’s again excellent score just lifts up the sense of optimism that bleeds through this place. It is a wonderful addition to not only this film but Trek lore as a whole.

7) This film introduces what I believe is Star Trek’s first canon gay character by revealing that John Cho’s Hikaru Sulu is in a partnership with another man.

(GIF originally posted by @maclexa-bane​)

However, this decision had one person surprisingly against it. Original Sulu actor and LGBT activist George Takei himself. Here is an excerpt from an article covering this in the Hollywood Reporter.

“I’m delighted that there’s a gay character,” he tells The Hollywood Reporter. “Unfortunately, it’s a twisting of Gene’s creation, to which he put in so much thought. I think it’s really unfortunate.”

Takei would take to social media a week later to clarify - but not disavow - his statement.

“I hoped instead that [Star Trek creator] Gene Roddenberry’s original characters and their backgrounds would be respected. How exciting it would be instead if a new hero might be created, whose story could be fleshed out from scratch, rather than reinvented. To me, this would have been even more impactful.”

I personally disagree with Takei. As a film student I can say that there seems to be this strange devotion to the “vision” of something. A decision will or won’t be made based on its support of the “original vision”. The original vision of something is almost totally irrelevant to what something actually is, however. Takei’s statements seem to be largely out of his respect for original creator Gene Rodenberry, which I can understand. But imagine some gay kid today LOVES the Star Trek movies and its characters. That kid is not going to care about Gene Rodenberry’s original vision, he is going to care about what Star Trek is today. I think seeing an already established (and incredibly important character) like Sulu express his sexuality in an open and accepted way is very much in line with what Star Trek is today (and will also have more of an impact on that kid than introducing a new character who they have no emotional investment in, but that’s just my personal belief).

The franchise has transcended Rodenberry or any one person involved. It is about unity (a major theme in this film), diversity, tolerance, and hope. And as long as it respects these core beliefs which make Star Trek what it is than I think it does more than respect Rodenberry’s original vision. It respects Star Trek.

8) I am going to talk about Spock and Uhura’s breakup and Spock Prime’s death, I promise. Just later.

9) Even though JJ Abrams did NOT direct this film, Greg Grunberg is still featured in it!

Grunberg is JJ Abrams’ lucky charm, appearing in almost all his films (notably absent from Star Trek into Darkness) in one form or another. And even though Abrams serves only as producer on this flick Grunberg still gets a part. Yay!

10) I like that Commodore Paris (one of the Starfleet higher ups at Yorktown) takes the time to say this to Kirk:

Commodore Paris: “It isn’t uncommon you know, even for a captain. To want to leave.”

It’s a common problem people have in life, the loss of identity. And of course it makes sense that it happens to Starfleet officers. Nothing is defined in space. It’s just space.

11) The skirmish between Kraal’s crew and the Enterprise is great.

Originally posted by cloudscity

As a way of introducing the primary plot into the film, it shows a clear lack of preparedness on the part of the Enterprise crew which is a great place to start the conflict and move forward. A, “started from the bottom,” type way. The film opening with such a heavy thrashing and the destruction of the Enterprise leaves a strong impact on the audience. You know these bad guys are people you do not want to mess with, you don’t even want to be in the same room as them. They just took down one of the best starships ever in a matter of minutes. The scene features great action, nice surprises, and is incredibly well paced. As the first major action set piece for the film, it is truly great.

12)

Kirk: “Abandon ship, Mr. Sulu.”

There is literally NO question from Sulu and only a the hesitation needed to process that request. He doesn’t even say, “Sir?” There’s no doubt in his mind. That is how much he trusts his captain and that is how well he knows his ship to admit when it’s done.

13) Idris Elba as Krall.

Originally posted by entertainmentweekly

I will forever be upset that Suicide Squad won the Oscar for Best Achievement in Makeup and Hairstyling when this film is PACKED with some of the most amazing practical creatures and aliens I have seen in years. You don’t have to look any further than Krall to see that. Idris Elba is not giving an animated performance, he’s not motion capture (not to knock motion capture actors, they’re some of the most under appreciated geniuses in Hollywood). That’s him. He is able to deliver a menacing and powerful performance through strong physicality. Elba does not play Krall as human and he shouldn’t. A huge factor for the character is that he’s lost his humanity. He is a beastly shade of his former self, motivated only by madness. I think Krall may be the best villain of this new trilogy (although it’s hard for me to be objective because Nero is still my favorite). Honestly, Elba freaking kills it as Krall and I don’t think they could have cast anyone to do a better job.

From a writing standpoint, Krall just gets more and more interesting as the film goes on.

Krall [after Uhura claims he has made an act of war against the federation]: “Federation act of war!”

But more on this later.

14) This film benefits from unique groupings for a good part of the film. Bones/Spock are the most prominent, but it’s not often you get to see Kirk and Chekov interact one-on-one or Uhura and Sulu. But for now, let’s talk about Bones & Spock.

Originally posted by iamtribblesome

I don’t think Bones and Spock get as much one on one time as they do in this film and I am so grateful for that. It provides a unique examination of their usually humorously tense interactions which was touched upon in The Search for Spock. I’ll discuss this more as I go (in one scene in particular), but they are able to be vulnerable around each other. Let their guards down, be totally honest, and make their friendship even stronger.

15) Sofia Boutella as Jaylah.

Originally posted by phaenix

I fucking love Jaylah. So much. I want more Jaylah.

To start, her design is incredibly unique and memorable. It helps her standout from not only the rest of the Enterprise crew but the rest of the inhabitants on the planet as well. And from the strong visual you are able to build into a living, breathing, unique character. She fits into the crew dynamics (particularly through her relationship with Scotty) wonderfully well and she is a kick ass queen. She is a technical genius with no training or teaching, able to set up a number of booby traps/cloak the Franklin/keep auxiliary power going. She has this deep pain that is in direct relation to Kirk’s. Her father - her entire family - died trying to save her, just as Kirk’s did. She has fears, she has strengths, she loves punk music! Jaylah on paper is amazing and actress Sofia Boutella is incredible in the part. Boutella is able to portray all of Jaylah’s wonderful layers - her badass exterior, her painful past, her growth and dealing with her fears - beautifully. Boutella is a star on the rise in Hollywood (already having starred in Kingsman and appearing as the title character in the new Mummy film coming out soon) and to date this is - I think - her best performance. She is just SO good.

A quick final note: it has been said by the filmmakers that they will not be recasting Chekov after Anton Yelchin’s death. I want Jaylah to take his place on the bridge. Because I fucking love Jaylah.

16) The relationship Jaylah and Scotty forge is so fun and heartfelt. Jaylah is able to constantly surprise Scotty and show that she’s his equal in a lot of ways, but when it comes to the pain of her past Scotty is able to help her deal with that. It’s one of my favorite relationships explored in the film and I hope to see it continue in the future.

17) The relationship with Kirk and Chekov is explored a little more subtly than say Bones and Spock but it is still there. The fact that Kirk is able to signal Chekov to help him trap the traitor amongst their midsts, and then of course this wonderful piece of dialogue.

Originally posted by alecc-bane

(GIFs originally posted by @alecc-bane​)

Seeing any two characters have this back and forth suggests they’ve done it before. There’s a comfort there that Chekov is able to talk to Kirk so honestly about his doubts and…I’m sorry, I’m just laughing thinking about this scene. I love the exchange between the pair.

18) So it later turns out that Krall is a captain named Edison from VERY early in the Federation’s life span.

Krall: “Federation has taught you that conflict should not exist.”

Krall [MUCH later]: “We knew pain, we knew terror. Struggle made us strong. Not peace, not unity.”

He is an outdated relic, an ancient ideology in a progressive time who thinks HIS way of life was right. And he’s willing to commit mass genocide because of his outdated and hateful ways. There’s also a lose of identity there, as he tells Kirk in the climax, “I’ve missed being me.” That lose of identity in the face of infinite space is exactly what Kirk is at risk of going through, so there’s a connection there between the two that ties back in to Kirk’s main conflict (something that I love). All in all, Krall’s pain is utterly unique in the Star Trek films I’ve seen and I am impressed with the elegance they were able to write it.

19) Spock and Bones having a heart-to-heart about where Spock is in life is one of the best scenes in the film.

Originally posted by thors

It is in this moment when Spock is at his most vulnerable, and it’s with Bones. He speaks as to how being one of the last Vulcan’s effects him, how it was that and the death of Spock-Prime which upset him so deeply he even broke up with Uhura because he thought he had to. He’s planning on leaving Starfleet. But Bones is an excellent friend in this scenes, listening to Spock and offering some kind non-judgmental words. He even gets Spock to laugh! It’s a great moment between these two characters who have been around for 50 years and I think one of the best character moments in all of Trek.

20) Did I mention I love Jaylah?

Jaylah [about her punk music]: “I like the beats and shouting!”

21) If I haven’t made it clear before, this film has some very well done humor. I think this is largely a result of Simon Pegg’s work on the script, but it wouldn’t have worked if cowriter Doug Jung hadn’t worked with him on it. Some examples…

Scotty: “I have an idea sir, but I’ll need your permission.”

Kirk: “Why would you need my permission?”

Scotty: “Because if I mess it up I don’t want it to be just my fault.”

Originally posted by projectcinc

Originally posted by msdonnatemplenoble

22) So 2009′s Star Trek was about Kirk and Spock moving past their conflict to form a respect and kinship with each other. Star Trek Into Darkness had them solidifying their friendship. And now we’ve reached this point:

Spock [while severely injured]: “We will do what we’ve always done, Jim: find hope in the impossible.”

23) I think something the filmmakers really use to their advantage is taking problems and solving them in a creative way through the sci-fi genre (where aliens are a norm and we have artificial gravity and such). A brilliant example of this:

(GIFs originally posted by @trek-daily)

Also this is all practical makeup. Did I mention this film lost the makeup and hairstyling award to Suicide Squad? I’m bitter.

24) The funniest freaking part of the entire movie!

25) I know I mentioned this before, but Jaylah’s past trauma with her family is incredibly strong for me.

Jaylah [talking about Krall’s hostage camp; refusing to take Kirk and company to their crew]: “Everyone who goes there he kills!”

And it is just another great example of the relationship Scotty and Jaylah have made.

Kirk [after Jaylah leaves & Scotty moves to go after her]: “Let her go.”

Scotty: “She’s lost people too, Captain.”

The fact that Scotty is able to help Jaylah through her grief in a respectful but pressing way speaks a lot to me. And Kirk overhears this, specifically that Jaylah’s dad sacrificed himself for her. Hmm, why does that sound familiar?

Originally posted by enterprisingyoungwoman

The entire scene is great for me for those key reasons: it develops Jaylah, it strengths her relationship with Scotty, and it ties into Kirk’s conflict in the film.

26) The entire diversion/rescue scene on the motorcycle is awesome and one of the strongest set pieces in the entire film. It is brilliantly and intelligently choreographed, keeping the audience and Krall on their toes through the use of decoy projections. It also features a fight between Jaylah and Mannix which ties directly into her arc as he is the man who killed her father. And Kirk - who said to, “Let her go,” about ten minutes earlier - risks himself to save her. She’s a part of his crew now and I love that.

Originally posted by forquicksilver

27) Remember how in the 2009 Star Trek Sulu messed up the take off of the Enterprise the first time? Well, I think the phrase, “started from the bottom now we’re here,” applies perfectly to this moment.

Originally posted by toakenshire

(GIF originally posted by @toakenshire)

30) I just love Jaylah’s face when she sees Krall’s planet drift away in the distance. That place was her hell. Her family was murdered there. She never thought she’d be able to escape. And now…

Originally posted by startrektime

31) Ladies & gentlemen: the most badass moment in Star Trek’s 50 year history.

Some highlights:

  • Kirk saying, “That’s a good choice,” tying directly into Young Kirk rocking out to this song in the 2009 film.
  • Bones: “Is that classical music?”
  • Chekov toe tapping.
  • Just how f***ing awesome that moment is. It gets you pumped!

I don’t know who had the initial idea to put this scene in the film, but I love them and I want to give them an award or something. This is glorious.

32) The climactic fist fight between Kirk and Krall is a lot of fun. Similar to Syl’s alien head hiding an important piece of technology, the filmmakers are able to use the concept of artificial gravity in a space station to their advantage by choreographing a unique and fun fight scene.

Originally posted by rattles-the-stars

33) And with this Kirk resolves his conflict of identity in relation to his father.

Kirk: “Better to die saving lives than to live taking them. That’s what I was born into.”

34) I love that Kirk says this but for a weird personal reason. It’s something I learned as a film student and something I wish other directing students (and a lot of professional directors) would learn.

Kirk [after Commodore Paris says he saved the lives of everyone in Yorktown]: “It wasn’t just me. It never is.”

35) Holy shit, I honestly cannot believe I forgot that Spock found this in Spock Prime’s belongings:

Not only is this a wonderful thing to include in the 50th anniversary of Star Trek but also it is something Spock REALLY needed to see. He wanted to live the life Spock Prime did and he thought that meant continuing the work on new Vulcan. But then he sees that Spock Prime was with the Enterprise crew DECADES into a future. He had a family for life. And so does Spock.

36) It’s hard for your eyes not to fall on Anton Yelchin when Kirk makes a toast, “To the Enterprise and to absent friends.”

Originally posted by soundsofmyuniverse

(GIF originally posted by @soundsofmyuniverse)

37) The fact that the entire main crew of the Enterprise gives the ending monologue for the first time speaks greatly to themes of unity present in the film and Kirk’s giving them credit.

38) And now I’m sad again.

39) “Sledgehammer” by Rihanna.

Originally posted by thebadgalrih

It’s not often that I talk about an end credits song for a film, but I felt I should make an exception this case. Rihanna is a major Star Trek fan, saying:

“This is something that’s been a part of me since my childhood, it’s never left me, I love Star Trek. It was automatic. I would do anything in terms of music. It’s such a big deal not only as a fan, as a musician… because Star Trek is such a big deal across the globe.”

You can feel the love for Trek come across in the song. Not necessarily a radio pop hit, I love this song nonetheless. I find it moving and it’s themes of fighting back after you get knocked down very much tie into the hope and resilience which is Star Trek. I think it is a wonderful composition and a great addition to the Star Trek musical library.


I love Star Trek Beyond. Although the 2009 film introduced me to the franchise, this film has the potential overtime to claim its place as my favorite Trek film. It is an absolutely perfect balance of old and new Trek, featuring standout writing, amazing effects, new ideas, a vibrant visual design, and a standout cast (with special mention to Sofia Boutella as Jaylah). It is a totally wonderful that taps into the hope and sense of adventure that the series has always been about. If you were disappointed with Star Trek Into Darkness or are looking to reclaim some love for the series - or even if you’re watching for the first time - give this film a viewing. You won’t regret it.

In the Rough

(based on this) part 1 (you are here), part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6



There’s a lot about Mari that Yuuri loves. In fact, he’d go so far as to say that he loves his sister more than almost anyone else, except maybe his parents. Despite their six year age difference, neither of them have ever had any other kids to really interact with. As such, each of them were the other’s best and only friend. But the fact has always remained that Mari is older than Yuuri. One day, he’s always known, she will be the queen of Yutopia. What he didn’t expect was for that day to come so quickly, or have such a profound effect on their relationship.

It was gradual at first: Mari turning him away from her door when he asks her to help him with his studies, Mari spending more and more time in the library with her own when she was never the best of students before, Mari lashing out at him when he actually gets the courage to press for her attention occasionally. Time and again, Mother assures him that it’s just the responsibility of being the crown princess that’s weighing on her. Still, Yuuri can’t help if he’s lonely.

That’s what led to this.

“Not now, Yuuri.” Mari is sounding increasingly irritated with him, but he can’t really seem to stop himself. It’s been months since they’ve had a proper conversation.

“It will only take a minute, I promise!”

“I don’t have a minute!” she finally snaps, rounding on him. “I don’t have a minute to myself because the coronation is so soon. What on earth makes you think that I have time to spare for you? Don’t be such a clingy child!”

Yuuri silently curses the way his eyes well up with tears. “I… Excuse me.”

“Yuuri, wait. I didn’t mean–” He can hear her calling out to his back, but the words don’t really register.

Being too overbearing has always been Yuuri’s biggest fear; he’s emotional and soft in a way that no self-respecting royal should ever be. Mari knows this, and used it against him. He really must be too much if she of all people is telling him so. He can just leave her alone until after the coronation. Maybe longer, if it looks like she’s feeling too overwhelmed by his presence. He has an outfit that he uses sometimes when palace life is too much for him and he sneaks out to go to town. He can use that to sneak out. He can take a horse, a sword, and some money, and hide out somewhere until everything blows over in a couple of months.

It doesn’t take Yuuri long to slip past the guards and get off the castle grounds. He’s done it countless times before, once even smuggling Prince Phichit out with him. He slips out the back way, through the forest. Everyone in town knows his face, and most of his subjects do too; it will be best to avoid people for a while.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that he’s brave enough to stray from the path. The woods between this and the next kingdom are deep, and more than one traveller has gotten lost within them, or attacked by robbers. If his maps are right, he’ll be able to get to the next kingdom within a fortnight.

Sleeping on the forest floor is irritating, but hardly anything new; this isn’t the first time that Yuuri has disappeared for a few days, even if it’s the first time that he’s planning on leaving the kingdom without permission. By the eighth day, Yuuri’s rations are beginning to get a bit low. He’s grimy, there are leaves and twigs in his hair, and his ratty cloak is rattier than ever. Still, he doesn’t turn back. At this point, going home would create more distress than it would relieve. If need be, he can just… kill a rabbit or something. There’s a stream less than ten minutes from the path, and making a fire is no problem. He can make it to the next kingdom.

The sound of a carriage jolts him out of his thoughts. He darts back into the trees, hiding in a bush. He still hasn’t crossed the Yutopia border, so it’s possible– probable, even –that the driver of that carriage knows who Yuuri is. As the carriage draws closer, Yuuri can make out little details that start to change his mind. Its blue, for one thing, and only a single carriage; most trader caravans are made up of several plain wagons with faded paint.

Yuuri hears rustling behind him. In less than a second, the quiet rustling becomes shouting. Bandits. Seven men attack the carriage from all sides, one even jumping from a tree to land on top of the carriage. Yuuri doesn’t even realize that he’s drawing his sword until it’s already out.

The door to the carriage flies open and two men– one man and one boy, really, no more than thirteen –jump out, weapons drawn and ready. The boy shouts something that sounds like “Stay the fuck there or I’m telling Dad,” but Yuuri can’t focus too much on him. He’s taken down one of the robbers, but there’s another one coming at him.

It takes the three of them nearly twenty minutes to knock out all of the robbers, and when they do, they’re panting.

“Thank you for the help.” The dark-haired man from the carriage holds out his hand for Yuuri to shake. “We might not have made it without you.”

“It–It was nothing, really.” Yuuri holds up his hands, as if that will deflect the praise. “I was just trying to help. Anyone would have done the same.”

“Tch.” The boy sheaths his sword. Now that Yuuri has a chance to look at him, he’s amazed. The boy is beautiful, almost fairy-like, but he fights like a demon. He’s also dressed like a royal. “At least you didn’t get in the way.”

Yuuri doesn’t quite know how to respond to that, but as it turns out, he doesn’t have to. There’s a laugh from inside the carriage and someone else exits. This man is definitely a royal, and it’s possible that he’s even more beautiful than the boy. They must be related, with their strangely colored hair and eyes.

“That’s high praise coming from you, Yuratchka.” The man looks Yuuri up and down, and Yuuri has to force himself not to blush. “I’ve decided. He’ll be my new bodyguard. I’ve been needing a new one, and I can’t bear to see my beloved younger brother fight on my behalf anymore.”

The man swoons dramatically, but it looks like he’s actually about to fall. Neither of his companions make a move to catch him, and neither does the driver, a woman with bright, fiery red hair. Yuuri is there before he knows it, catching the man before he can actually fall to the ground.

He finds himself looking into the most piercing pair of eyes that he’s ever seen. His eyes inexplicably heat up and Yuuri can tell that if he looks for too long, he’ll be overwhelmed; those eyes can see straight into his soul.

“Be careful,” Yuuri manages.

The man flicks a piece of silver hair out of his eyes and smiles, standing up straight. “Yes, he’ll do nicely. I’m keeping him.”

He ends up on the floor a second later anyway, courtesy of the flying kick that the boy– his younger brother, Yuuri reasons –aims at his back. “Don’t just assume that some random man in the forest is trustworthy enough to be your bodyguard! Think this through, old man!”

“I’m only twenty two,” the man pouts from the ground. “You’re so mean, Yuratchka. Besides, he saved my life, and he doesn’t seem to have anywhere to go. Dad will allow it.”

Yuratchka rolls his eyes and walks over to the carriage. “Whatever. You might want to ask him what his name is before you ask him to risk his life for you though.”

The door slams and Yuuri is still a little confused. The man is still on the ground, the dark haired man from earlier is sheathing his sword without a care in the world, apparently used to this sort of behavior.

“He has a point!” Silver-Haired Man bounces up and picks the twigs out of his hair. “If you’re my new bodyguard, I must know your name.”

“Yuuri,” he says without thinking. Then he realizes that giving his true last name could be a very bad idea. “Yuuri… Nishigori.”

Silver-Haired Man introduces himself as Victor Nikiforov, the crown prince of the neighboring kingdom. The fairy-like boy with the foul mouth is indeed his brother, Prince Yuri. The other man is Georgi Popovich, Yuri’s personal bodyguard, and their driver is called Mila. The four of them have apparently been travelling together nearly all of Yuri’s life.

The reality of what he’s just inadvertently agreed to doesn’t hit until he’s sitting in the carriage with them later: he’s agreed to become the personal bodyguard to the crown prince of the neighboring kingdom, who would no doubt know his name but not his face. Yuuri can’t help but wonder how he’s going to get himself out of this one without causing himself and everyone around him massive embarrassment.

Luckily, he has several months to come up with a solution.

anonymous asked:

hey i saw u reblog the alex x reader au today and if you want to id love to see a sequel to that maybe w scott finding out or like a secret relationship or scott finding out about the secret relationship ;;)))) thanks in advance!!! ps i love ur writing and you you are a goddess among us

Alex Summers + best friend’s older brother au [refer to this drabble]

A/N: okay so like if i’m being realistic with myself the odds of me ever actually writing this out properly: slim to fucking none because this has been sitting in my inbox for months BUT I can provide you with the full out headcanons of how it all came to be in the first place. so. (hey @kurtwxgners@mvximoff@rax-writes@paperclipmac have some alex stuff) (sidenote: karley we should revisit this au sometime bc its a good one [eyes emoji])

nsfwish? almost? idk there’s like? heavy making out at the end? idk?

  • You’ve been best friends with Scott since forever because your parents were friends so it just kind of happened
  • As a result of this, you’ve also been around Alex since forever because you were always at the Summers house
  • You’ve also had a lowkey crush on Alex since you started to think boys maybe weren’t so gross after all
  • It stayed pretty lowkey, till the summer before junior year, but you didn’t make a thing about it because 1) you figured it would make shit weird and 2) you figured out that Alex was planning to go abroad for his senior year so why would you intentionally bring it up when he’s about to leave
  • Alex found an exchange to go on and did his senior year abroad and you went through junior year being Scott’s best friend like nothing had changed because nothing really had changed and not seeing Alex for the year made your crush kind of hibernate
  • Then during the summer after he finished high school and the one right before your senior year, he found a work placement and worked the entire summer, earning money, and you see him like once or twice but mostly he’s living with a new friend Sean a town over
  • You don’t really see him again till he’s home on his first break from college and damn he looks so much better than you remember him looking and your crush is definitely back in full fucking force
  • You don’t know it, but the first time he sees you when he’s back, he’s actually breathless, because you’re older, and more confident and so, so beautiful and he’s pretty sure he must’ve been fucking blind or something, because there’s no way you weren’t gorgeous before if you’re this goddamn stunning now
  • Do you spend a lot more time at Scott’s house now that Alex is back than you would otherwise? Maybe. You’re pretty sure Scott doesn’t notice anything unusual though, and if he does, he definitely doesn’t know why
  • You drove over to the Summer’s house one Friday night to go over some SAT stuff, and a torrential fucking rainstorm comes while you’re there
  • Your mum calls you and tells you that she really doesn’t want you driving in weather as bad as this, and she can come and pick you up, or you can stay there if it’s alright with the Summers’
  • Of course you’d rather stay there, because then you won’t need to come back to pick up the car later, so you tell her not to worry, you’ll stay over
  • Scott just nods when you tell him you’re staying over and just reminds you where the extra sheets and pillows are for the couch before tossing you an old shirt and a pair of sweatpants for you to sleep in
  • You give up on trying to go directly to sleep at about 1am so you go to the kitchen to get a glass of water or something and immediately regret your decision because Alex is in the kitchen in a thin, faded, fraying flannel shirt and sweat pants slung dangerously low on his hips, and his longish hair is yanked back in a messy bun and you feel like a fucking idiot because he looks like he’s just about to go to bed and just looking at him like this makes your knees weak
  • He sees you in one of his old shirts (it used to be his, then it got passed on to Scott, who never wore it, so he basically still thinks of it as his shirt) and some sweats and no makeup and you’re not at all put together or tidy, but he’s positive you’ve never looked better, because if he doesn’t think too hard you look like you just climbed out of his bed and the idea is more than a little dizzying
  • “oh, shit, hey Alex. I-thought the kitchen was-” “empty? I mean it is the middle of the night, that’d be the reasonable assumption.” “Yeah. Well.” “Well.”
  • Neither of you is really sure how you managed to get through the interaction unscathed, but by the end of it, you’re both sitting on the couch watching shitty national geographic re runs and laughing at Alex’s shittier jokes, and each time one of you gets up or leans forwards, or really shifts at all, you both gravitate almost unconsciously towards the other
  • You’re not quite sure just how it happened, but you’re tucked neatly under his arm, leaning into his side, and you’re tipping your head back, laughing at another one of his ridiculous puns, and suddenly he’s kissing you, almost hesitantly, and his lips are soft and warm and you want more, but just as quickly as the kiss began, it’s over
  • “Shit, I’m so sorry-that was-I shouldn’t’ve-” he stammers, and you’ve never seen him look so startled or unsure in your life, but you don’t want him to apologise, you want him to kiss you again, so you reach out to grab the front of his shirt and yank his lips back to yours
  • Alex doesn’t need any more encouragement than that, the arm round your shoulders tightening to pull you in closer to him, his mouth pressing against yours with more force than previously
  • One of your arms comes up to wrap around his neck as you shift closer still, and he pulls away again, breathing hard
  • “Are you sure you-I mean you’re Scott’s best friend-we probably shouldn’t-” he tries again, but you’ve never heard anyone sound less convincing in your life, so you just tilt your head to kiss along the sharp line of his jaw and the tempting column of his throat, feeling immensely satisfied when you feel the hitch in his breath as your lips brush softly over his pulse
  • “I’ll stop if you want me to,” You murmur, punctuating each word with a press of your mouth and he lets out a low, strained chuckle
  • “That’s not fighting fair and you know it, beautiful,” he breathes, and the term of endearment makes your head spin, even as you wind your arms around his neck
  • “Good,” you whisper back before pulling him in to kiss him again, one of your hands sliding into his hair, pushing the hair tie out and tangling in it as it falls out of the bun he had yanked it back into
  • You’re in his lap now, his arms tightly around you, hands gripping your hips, keeping you so close you can feel his heart thudding in his chest, and the kiss is hot and insistent and it makes you a little giddy because yeah, you’ve kissed people before but it’s never felt like this and as his tongue slides against yours, you let out an involuntary gasp, your hand reflexively tugging back on his hair and Alex actually moans into your mouth
  • “Fuck, babygirl, give a guy some warning,” he groans, low and shuddering and muffled by your skin, and you can feel him starting to get a hard on, and knowing he wants you is gratifying and scary and thrilling, and as he bites down lightly on you lower lip, you tentatively reach a hand down to palm him through his sweats
  • The moan he lets out is electrifying, needy and wanting and this is starting to lead into uncharted territory for you but you’ve never wanted anyone more than you want him
  • But then he pulls away from you a little and you freeze up in panic and hurt and confusion, because you’re pretty sure you weren’t misreading the signals, but you don’t say anything you just look away, rubbing uncomfortably at your temples and doing your best not to tear up, because you already feel stupid and you really don’t want to make more of a fool of yourself than you already have
  • Suddenly, one of Alex’s hands is reaching out, cupping your cheek and gently forcing you to look at him. He leans in and kisses you softly, his thumb brushing soothingly across your cheekbone as he draws back, a small, reassuring smile on his lips
  • “I’m sorry, beautiful, I didn’t mean-” he starts, voice gentle. “It’s not that I don’t want to. I do, god I really do. But I-I like you. Have for a while. I want to do this right. I don’t want to screw up,” he explains, and he sounds almost nervous, like he’s not sure whether this is something you want and he looks so uncertain, so uncharacteristically vulnerable that you kiss him again, moving in to tuck yourself against his side once more, and you can feel the tension go out of his body as he kisses you back gently, his arm going around you again.
Prince!Mingyu
  • Mingyu grew up as the youngest son of a family of three. So kid had fun growing up. 
  • He had so much freedom being the youngest because he was never supposed to take the throne or the stress that came with it. 
  • of course he put this freedom to good use.
  • Since he could talk he would never be in the castle, always roaming around the city with a bodyguard. 
  • As he got older, he’d go on further and further expeditions, going to towns and cities in the kingdom and exploring but also learning from the people there. 
  • He was like 10 but no one can deny the prince.
  • The chefs were 90% sure that letting the young prince this close to an open flame was a TERRIBLE idea but he just looked so excited…. and his bodyguards are scary……
  • When he was 12, he was sent away to a boarding school.
  • and it was one of those, celebrities and royalty from small countries type of gig like it was HELLA prestigious 
  • and he easily climbed to the top of his class
  • Mingyu was blessed with a natural ability to be good at everything. He wasn’t the best, but he could do it all. 
  • and that’s where you came in. 
  • you really didn’t see what all the hype was around mingyu but you didn’t really care. 
  • his following of girls was a little annoying but no one bothered you so you didn’t care. 
  • the problem came when he started being good at things that did pertain to you. 

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Distractions pt 2

Pt. 1 || Pt. 2 || Pt. 3 || Pt. 4 || Pt. 5 || Pt. 6  || Pt. 7 || Pt. 8 || Pt.9 || Pt. 10 || Pt. 11 || Pt. 12

Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Angst (kinda…I guess?)

Summary: You and Yoongi had a history which nobody knew about. Now that you’ve debuted, you know your paths would cross again.

Word Count: 1689

Originally posted by jjks

Yoongi tossed and turned in bed unable to get the image of you out of his head. Seeing you at that music show was the first time he’d seen you in person in almost four years. He couldn’t lie, you looked amazing and watching you perform was on a whole other level. He knew you loved music just as much as he did, but he never imagined you going through trainee years or debuting as an idol. 

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No Happy Endings | Wonho [M]

Originally posted by wonhontology

Warnings: Strong language, lewd comments.

word count: 3,532

“We’ve got a problem,” Hoseok tells Kihyun through the phone as he paces the length of the bathroom.

1 | 2 | 3 | …

Part 4: Breakups, Makeups, and Break-Ins.


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Liberty Pt.6

Originally posted by neverlandpixy

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader, Steve Rogers x Peggy Carter, surprise ship (that wasn’t a pun)

AU: Pirates of the Caribbean Universe

Characters: Bucky Barnes, Natalia Romanoff, Clint Barton, Tony Stark, Wanda Maximoff, Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson, Peter Parker, Baron Zemo (mentiones briefly)

Warnings for this fic: Angst, smut, running away, profanity, violence, self defense practicing

Warnings for this chapter: Alcohol, Drunk!Reader, throwing up, a few cute lil kisses, fluff, LANGUAGE

Word Count: 3889

A/N: BOOM! There’s a surprise in this chapter, (not a surprise for some) I’ve used google translate and my own knowledge for the spanish speaking parts {my cousins are bilingual and they’ve taught me a bit of shit}

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5

Captain James ‘Bucky’ Barnes was a peculiar man, how he sailed the seas for most of his 27 years. He was born at sea, he would most likely die at sea. All pirates, including those in the farthest corners of the maps, had heard of the infamous Captain. You? You were the governor’s daughter, secretly hoping to be taken out to seas and to be set free.

~

“I shouldn’t be doing what I am- I should only be doing this once I’m married, but I say screw the rules. I’m glad it’s you, and if I’m honest, on this night, I think I’m falling for you, Captain James.”

“And I, you, Miss Y/L/N.”

~

The day after tomorrow ~

As the St. Brooklyn came to the Spanish harbour, you watched as the bustling Spaniards made their way through the town. It was a lovely sight to see, palm trees, sandy beaches, sunny skies. It was about 4 pm and the sun was still beating down on everyone and everything.

You looked beside you to see Wanda, who was laughing with Sam, they looked at each other as though they were in love, maybe, and a smile tugged onto your lips.

Yet again, once Bucky had anchored the ship, he tipped off the harbour manager and gave a false name. He held out his arm and you took it willingly, feeling his muscles ripple underneath your fingers.

You had walked up to a large stall and Bucky dropped plenty of Spanish reals into the hand of the owner of the stall.

Diez cajas de la mejor comida que tienes, por favor.” He smiled kindly at the man as he said a quiet ’sí, señor’ in return, Bucky requesting for some of his crew to take it back to the ship.

Shall we gather some rum, water, and port? You can get something too if you’d like.” Bucky smiled down at you, you could feel a small amount of wonder wash through you, maybe they sold some fresh orange juice around here, you heard that Spain was known for the glorious taste of the fruit.

Could we find somewhere that sells fresh orange juice, Sir?

We may, mi amor, let’s go.” As you walked alongside him, you felt the cool breeze whisper through your hair, and two familiar voices came up behind you both.

Captain!” You heard Sam chirp, you both turned to see him escorting Wanda by the arm. “May Wanda and I accompany both of you?

Of course Sam! And you know full well you can call me by my actual name when the crew isn’t around!” Bucky patted Sam on the back and gave a sweet smile to Wanda. As you all walked down the main street, the sweet smell of mangos, strawberries, and oranges filled your nostrils and you sighed happily, for it had been so long since you indulged in such food.

You approached the stall with Wanda and asked for some orange juice, “Naranja con pulpa, por favor.” Bucky was utterly surprised how you knew Spanish- as a woman who was confined to only a small island knew a language other than English. As you waited for your juice to be finished, you spoke quietly with Wanda.

So, tell me, what’s with you and Sam, hm?” You both chuckled lightly.

It um, it started when Bucky had liberated him and many others during a slave trade, he had… been branded, he was hurting and well…Bucky had taken him under his wing, helped him heal from all the abuse inflicted onto him, the rest is for him to say but… He had sought refuge with me during the nights; he had nightmares. One night, I was out on the main deck looking at the stars, he came and sat by me.

~

“Oh, hello Sam, how are you tonight? No bad dreams I hope.” Wanda questioned, a frown adorning her features.

“Much better now I’m with you, Miss Wanda-”

“Please, Sam, no ‘miss’, I am not your superior, I am your equal, please remember that…” Wanda whispered, her hand coming to softly rest against his jaw, her thumb stroking the slight stubble as her eyes met his. They were warm, dark, beautiful.

As a slight breeze danced across the ship, a piece of Wanda’s hair rested across her face, Sam wasted no time in gently tucking it behind her ear.

“How many stars do you think are in the sky, Sam?” Wanda murmured. Sam looked at her then up at the sky.

“At least seven hundred billion, or more.” He had turned to see her looking at him with a secret smile, seems like all they were really were doing was waiting for love, and they didn’t have to wait longer than a millisecond.

Inching closer, he had sliced the space between the both of them, pressing a tender kiss upon her soft lips.

~

Ah, I see. As long as you are both happy, that’s all that matters.” You smile at the brunette.

There is much more to it, but I’ll tell you once we leave port.” She whispered.

The lady at the stall cleared her throat, turning around to see the small woman holding two large glass bottles of orange juice.

Gracias, señora!” You giggled with Wanda as you carried a bottle of the sweet juice each.

You turned and saw Bucky giving you a look that almost sent you to your knees, it was full of admiration and affection, so intense and you couldn’t help but feel the bird in your chest try and break out of its cage.

You approached him and took his hand in yours, following Sam and Wanda back to the market.

Here, let me.” You heard Sam murmur to the woman in red, her blush was apparent on her cheeks and you saw a slight wink in Sam’s eyes. You knew it.

Bucky took you to multiple stalls, he bought you a new corset and some pants, a pair of new boots and some blouses, so you didn’t have to wear the same clothes every day. You thanked him with a chaste kiss to his cheek and you swear you saw him blush only slightly.

~

As the night fell, the cooler it had become and Bucky escorted you back to the St. Brooklyn. As you both got to the ship Bucky heard a deep voice behind him.

Well, if it isn’t the legendary Captain James Barnes…

Bucky whipped around faster than a pistol bullet, you felt the blood drain from your face as you looked at the man in front of you. Was he here to arrest Bucky? Kill him? Take him? Bucky was a wanted man.

S-Steve Rogers, what are you doing here? I thought you were up in the north east Atlantic?” Bucky went to hug the man and pat him on the back, a wide smile donning his features.

Well, I arrived here about two days ago, Peggy had never visited Spain before, and I couldn’t resist.” The tall blond man was as big as Bucky, blue eyes like the uniform he was wearing- you knew he didn’t belong to the Trading Company; his thick American accent was apparent when he spoke- most likely from New York, like Bucky.

And who would this beautiful lady be?” You jerked your head up to see 'Steve’ smiling down at you. So you took a timid step forward, shaking his hand lightly.

Y/N Y/L/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Sir.” You gave him a forced smile, you didn’t know whether to smile or not.

Y/N, he’s okay- I’ve known him since infancy. He won’t hurt me, love.” You felt a blush spread across your cheeks as Bucky whispered the words into your ear, you let out a sigh of relief and turned to smile at your lover.

We’re having a small celebration upon my ship tonight- Peggy turned 25- if you’d like to join us we can find another part of the coast to tie the ships together so we don’t drift apart during the night.” You stood awkwardly beside them as they spoke.

That is a brilliant idea, I’d be a fool to pass up such an offer, how about we gather both our crews and do it now, sound good?

~

Bucky and Steve decided on setting the party on the St. Brooklyn; it had a wider and longer main deck. You could hear the waves lap against the sides the ship as the men anchored it once more, you watched as Bucky and the crew tied up the sails. Wanda was slowly approaching you as you sat on the staircase towards the quarterdeck.

So, I need to ask you something,” You piped up, “Bucky… Okay well, when I first saw you use your powers, I said to Bucky that you could literally rule the seas, and well, he said something about how you couldn’t, something about you don’t have the full ability because you gave your heart to someone else?

Wanda sighed heavily and sat on the staircase with you.

Okay, so, this is the continued story from earlier. When Bucky had taken Sam in, which you already know the whole story about our… thing. Well anyway, he had a brand on his shoulder, from the slave trade, and he opened up to me about it one night. He had told me it was the root of his nightmares, bad thoughts and stress. I used my magic to make it disappear, the action I took made me realise that I was in love with him. Y/N, I would do anything for him, including…giving him my heart, I didn’t cut the beating thing out of my chest, no- I gave him my heart in the spiritual term. My heart belongs to Sam and Sam only. It’s better that I don’t have my full powers; they can take over your soul, you can make reckless decisions.”

You nodded along to everything she said, letting the words sink through your skin, it all made sense; the looks, the hidden touches, stolen kisses even.

The sun had finally set and the moon was apparent against the dark sky, both ships were illuminated with oil lamps, making the scene look like a swarm of giant fireflies if one were to look from afar. You noticed the loud music of strings playing an upbeat Irish tune and you smiled, remembering a small band that played something similar at the annual summer festival in Port Royal when you were younger.

Care to dance, miss?” You whipped around to see Bucky with an extended arm, you took his hand and he pulled you against him.

Bucky, I don’t know the steps!

Neither do I!” You both laughed as you danced along the main deck, holding each other in close proximity, this was the happiest you had felt in a long time.

As the song finished, you quickly grabbed a forgotten bottle of rum and took a few large gulps, the liquid burning the back of your mouth as you swallowed and squinted your eyes. As you opened them you saw Bucky stare at you, his mouth agape and eyebrows almost resting on his hairline.

What, you think a respectable, young, intelligent lady of Port Royal can’t drink?” You smirked, offering your captain the bottle, he took it gratefully and kept his eyes on yours as his lips wrapped around the neck of the bottle, a pang of desire drifting down to your core, you ignored it though; tonight was a night of having fun with him, no sexualness. He passed the bottle back to you and you gulped the rest down, almost half a bottle! Feeling a rush of blood go to your head, a few other songs were played and you felt your vision begin to blur only slightly as you turned back to Bucky.

W-What is it you pirates say? 'drink up me hearties yo ho’ Isn’t it? Or s-something…” You slurred, making Bucky chuckle as he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead.

Have you ever been drunk before, Y/N?” He mumbled, you looked up at him through your lashes and pouted, shaking your head.

Oh, darling, it’s going to be a fun night…

Suddenly, you felt a gentle hand on your shoulder, you whipped around to see a woman slightly taller than yourself with wavy brunette hair and a smile as bright as the white sails of the HMS Endeavor.

Hello, you must be Y/N, I’m Peggy!” You shook her hand, giving her a once over, she wore similar clothes to you, white blouse, brown pants and black boots. Her fair skin made her dark eyes contrast against her face and you admired her beauty greatly.

“It’s wonderful to meet you Peggy!” You returned, “Steve does know how to throw a party, does he not?

Indeed he does, I believe he’s throwing this one because I turned 25 a few nights previous. Hey- have you ever fired a pistol?

The question took you aback, you’d never touched the blasted things, they were deemed dangerous and if not handled correctly you could get a backfire injury.

I believe I haven’t, why’d you ask?” You had to raise your voice just a tad and the reason made you smile, for the crew had grown loud and boisterous.

Would you like me to show you how?” You quirked a brow at her question.

“I’d like to try!” She smirked at your retort and glanced at Steve, grabbing your hand she guided you to the quarterdeck, an empty glass bottle in her hand. As Peggy approached the railing of the deck, she placed the bottle down and stepped back a few metres, gesturing for you to come hither.

Now, take the gun, hold it like this, put your fingers here… Make sure you use both hands at first,” Peggy placed your fingers and hands in the right places, shifting your form so it was at a perfect angle to shoot the bottle. “shoot.

You pulled the trigger and almost got knocked back by the force. It was in a blink of an eye that you saw the bottle explode and shards of glass fly everywhere like a firecracker and you flinched, squeezing your eyes shut.

The ringing in your ears blocked out the silence, and when you opened your eyes you were met with Peggy smirking at you. You let out the breath that was trapped in your lungs, shoulders slumping.

That was bloody brilliant! Y/N you’re a natural!” You smiled at the woman and gently handed the musket pistol in her hands for her to put it back on her affects belt.

You heard heavy footsteps come up to the quarterdeck and saw Bucky. He gave you both a confused look and turned to see the bottom of a rum bottle.

Peggy what did you do?

She didn’t cower, more like an ‘I’m innocent, I swear!’ look. “I just showed her how to fire, James. Calm down- at least she didn’t get a backfire injury like I did.

Peggy turned and showed you her hand, there was a thick white scar trailing from the inner side of her thumb to the middle her palm.

When Steve first taught me how to fire a musket, I didn’t hold it correctly and the force of it ripped my hand open, it took a few good months to heal, I had to train with my opposite hand and now I’m ambidextrous.” Your face lit up at the word; so were you! But then the fleeting moment of giddiness simmered away as you realised Peggy and Steve weren’t to stay on your voyage to Singapore, at least, that’s what you thought.

Um- Bucky! I, er, oh… fuck.” Bucky flinched, you had never cursed before! “I- I don’t feel well-” you ran to the side of the ship, a pain in your head and the feel of bile rising in your throat. You felt gentle fingers pull your hair out of your face as you threw up what was in your stomach, the foul taste of rum and and bread combined leaving a bad aftertaste in your mouth.

~

Someone can’t handle their alcohol,” Bucky laughed, whipping a rag out of his pocket to gently wipe at your mouth. “Let’s get you cleaned up, angel, c’mon.

Will she be okay, James?” Peggy asked, shock written on her pale features.

Yes Ma’am, it’s her first time drinking, obviously one hell of a lightweight. Would you be a doll and tell Steve I’ll be back in about 20 minutes? I just need to clean her up.” Bucky slithered an arm around your waist as you leaned against him, groaning at the thump, thump between your eyes.

As you approached the doors of the Captain’s Cabin, you felt the familiar burn of bile slither up your throat. Detaching yourself from Bucky, you stumbled to the side of the ship to hurl again, this time only throwing up once and then dry heaving, leaving a nasty pulled-muscle feel in your spine and throat. You fell to your knees in exhaustion, salty tears slipping from your eyes, though they weren’t from sadness; you didn’t know what to feel right now.

It felt like an eternity or a life long prison sentence before you felt two dainty hands lift you by your underarms.

My, my, Y/N. How much did you drink?” Wanda stroked your hair from your face, as she questioned you.

Only ha-half a bottle of… well it was a biiiiig bottle of, er, rum? I think?” You felt the world spin as you mustered the words to speak. “I-I’ve never ever, ever drank alcohol before p-please don’t be mad at me.” You whimpered, feeling the same hands hold your face.

Oh, Y/N, why would I be mad? Everyone’s got to experience new things in their life, even if the outcome isn’t as good as they hope.” You smiled up at Wanda, you figured apart from Peter, she was your best friend and you hugged her tightly.

Bucky’s bringing you some mint water, oh- here he is. I’m going to go and give Sam that promised dance.” She kissed the top of your head in a motherly fashion and jogged away, you were slumped against a bannister as Bucky approached.

Here, Y/N, gargle this and spit it out.” He lifted the goblet to your lips and the strong taste of mint almost made you gag. You swivel and spit through the wooden bars of the banister.

Please take me inside, Bucky.” You rested your head against his chest as he carried you to his cabin once more, hoping you weren’t going to throw up. You were beginning to feel normal again but not enough to feel sober.

As Bucky gently placed you on the bed, couldn’t help but admire him, he shrugged his waist coat off and rolled his sleeves up his forearms, revealing the branded ‘P’ on his right wrist. He was beautiful nonetheless, even with scars, or cuts or bruises. You tugged on your blouse and yanked it over your head, finding no energy to remove your corset, you slumped back onto the bed. You kicked off your boots and groaned, wiggling your aching toes inside your trouser stockings. You leaned up against the headboard as Bucky reappeared with a damp cloth in his hand.

Bucky lightly dragged the cloth against your face and neck, the cool sensation seemed to help you breathe deeply and you couldn’t help but chuckle, for Bucky had his eyes trained onto your chest, every breath you took had your breasts straining against your corset.

My eyes are up here, James.” You giggled as you whispered, earning a quiet ‘sorry, kitten, every part of you is just so beautiful’ from his lips. “I feel kind of sober now, all I have is a pounding headache. How are you feeling?” Your body betrayed your words as you hiccuped. You looked into his icy blue eyes as your hand came to stroke his shoulder.

“I’m absolutely perfect, angel.” He bestowed a feather-like kiss to the area between your cheek and your jaw, and the previous pang of desire fired up again. As Bucky dragged the cloth down your neck, he maintained eye contact with you, watching as your pupils dilated when the damp rag came into contact with the top of your breasts, your breath hitched in your throat as he squeezed hard on the damp fabric, sending a few cold streams of water down your cleavage. Your no-sexualness-tonight-rule was trying to break out the window, but you refused to let it go. You leaned into him and pressed your mouth to his, a sweet, tender kiss was all it was.

I’m feeling quite fuzzy, I don’t know what this feeling is.”

That my dear, is a feeling between relaxation and happiness I believe. would you like to change out of these confines?” Bucky asked, stroking your hair away from your shoulders. You mumbled a ‘mhm’ and a ‘please’ as you felt him kiss your shoulder.

Let me go and get one of my shirts…” Bucky was back as soon as he left, a white shirt in hand. He motioned for you to turn around so he could unlace your corset. The feeling of his cool fingers against your spine raised goosebumps on your forearms and you gasped when you felt very familiar lips gently tease your neck, the mixture of being undressed and teeth against your skin making you tilt your head to the side with a heavy breath escaping your parted lips.

I’m not going to do anything with you tonight, angel, just a few kisses, for I don’t want to take advantage of a beautiful soul like yours.” The words sent the butterflies in your tummy into a frenzy, you heard Bucky mutter an ‘arms up’ and you slightly felt like a child, and the thought made you chuckle. You felt him slide the corset and replace it with the cool fabric of his shirt. The strong scent of him filled your nostrils and you sighed.

Pants on or off?” You answered his question by tugging them down your hips, your soft thighs grabbing his attention. He placed a loving hand upon one, squeezing only slightly. “Y’know, you look good in my shirt- scratch that, you could probably look good in a potato sack.” You gave a hearty laugh which coaxed him into a fit of giggles too. “I mean, you’re just wonderful, you’re soft, angelic, your keep your sword as sharp as your wit and you seem like the person to not be afraid of battle. I really, truly admire you, Y/N.

By then you had shifted and laid your head on his thick thighs, your hand stroking his knee. You felt his fingers stroke over the exposed skin of your neck, over your shoulder and rested on your waist.

B-Bucky can I sing you a lullaby? I-I know I’m still, er, drunk but it’s one my father used to sing to me when I was an infant.” He chuckled at your request and uncertainty.

Of course, my love, but I must get back to Steve soon, it’s Peggy’s birthday after all and I haven’t seen them in a long time and you must get some rest.

Okay, um, I can’t remember the full lyrics, but I know a few…

Oh, someday this chair may be a boat for another pair and you and your baby will sail the sea,” You felt him jerk at the words, making you pause, but you continued. “Within this rocking chair and as we rock and hum and sing so you will go too and dreams, with sweep and with swing will take baby and boat and you.” You hicupped and it made him chuckle lightly, you yawned and smushed your face against his thighs some more, god, they were so comfortable!

~

Y/N… Did your father ever tell you where that lullaby is from?” Bucky asked, he could feel the unwanted tears pool in his eyes.

Mmm, he ne’er told me, why’d y’ask Buck?” You mumbled in your relaxed state.

Doll… That’s a lullaby only pirates know.

~

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