it would be unsanitary

anonymous asked:

The game already explained the bathroom thing. Monster food doesn't cause you to expel anything after you eat it, so there was no need for bathrooms.

It’s true that monster food absorbs converts perfectly into energy! This is why there is no need for a single toilet anywhere in Undertale. However, where would a human fit into all this? First, here’s what we know.

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S:
Hmmm… Isn’t human food different from monster food?
It does things like “spoil.”
And when you eat it, it passes all the way through your whole body.
Disgusting.
I’d love to try it sometime. 

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S:
And I’ve heard they have things called bathrooms.

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S (after Undyne battle):
 To a human, monster food would be very interesting.
As soon as you eat it, it converts perfectly into energy.
…that makes me wonder. How do humans do it?
Eat during battle…?
Ice cream in one hand, sword in the other.
That’s the way of the monster warrior…

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S (after Asriel battle):
Soon, I’ll be able to try some human food…
And then I guess I’ll try a human bathroom, too.

Toby didn’t cover his bases very well though. Despite this monster never hearing of a “bathroom” before, bathrooms are mentioned a few times in Undertale.

NARRATION:
Jerry tells everyone it has to go to the bathroom.

PAPYRUS:
WHOOPSY DOOPSY! I JUST REMEMBERED!
I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!!

ALPHYS:
Now we’re officially friends! Ehehehe!
Heheh…
Heh…
I’m going to the bathroom.

ALPHYS:
I’m going to the bathroom, so I’ll be MIA for a bit.
I’m… I’m sure you can handle this puzzle yourself!

Considering that showers are mentioned by both Sans and Alphys, chances are these bathrooms are literally for bathing or showering (Alphys even has a tub in the True Lab). Toilets don’t seem to exist, especially considering Papyrus’ phone call:

PAPYRUS:
WHERE ARE YOU? I HEAR WATER.
ARE YOU IN THE TOILET?
ALSO, WHAT’S A TOILET?

However…

NARRATION (during Shyren battle):
Sans is selling tickets made of toilet paper.

Sans, why? Toilet paper could come from the dump, though that doesn’t seem hygienic. But this leads to the next question: how would Chara get by in a toilet free world, and what effect would a monster food diet have on them?

I admit that when it comes to Caretaker AU, I have given this more thought than is probably necessary. I’m not a doctor, but I do have a basic understanding of physiology so please bear with me and my reasoning.

Humans have very complex systems for absorbing food (digestive system) and for keeping the blood clean (urinary system). Chara would not be able to survive long without water, and even magical water wouldn’t cut it: kidneys create urine in order to get rid of waste built up in the blood. And while a lot of this is metabolic (food) waste, the kidneys also clear out other waste such as dead blood cells. Urine plays an important role in staying healthy, which goes beyond just food.

As for the digestive system, food with perfect absorption into pure energy might actually cause terrible long term effects. While I don’t have any data on what happens if the lower intestine stops being used completely, I can say that an organ that stops being used has a tendency develop problems and/or fail. With how dependent humans are on regular eating cycles, I would be concerned that instantly converted food in the stomach would end up causing the the unused lower digestive tract to stagnate and even fail.

Therefore, while the monster in Grillby’s assumes that humans would experience the same perfect conversion from food into energy that monsters do, I theorize the experience would not quite be identical. Monster food would be immediately energizing and healing with a very efficient absorption rate, but some waste would still pass through the body, due to a non-magical human body being unable to convert all of it. Small amounts of monster food would still pass through the entire digestive tract, ensuring all organs are still functioning regularly.

And that’s why in this AU some buildings had to be outfitted with toilets in the Underground for Chara.

ibtimes.co.uk
Slavery returns to Africa: Migrants sold at open markets in Libya
Vulnerable refugees from West Africa often arrive in the country with no money and no papers.

Migrants from West Africa are being openly traded in “public slave markets” across Libya.

As a departure point for refugees trying to get to Europe, migrants arriving in Libya from sub-Saharan Africa are particularly vulnerable due to a lack of money and little in the way of documentation.

Survivors have told the International Organization for Migration (IOM) how there are slave markets and private prisons all over Libya.

Mohammed Abdiker, IOM’s head of operation and emergencies, said: “The situation is dire. The more IOM engages inside Libya, the more we learn that it is a vale of tears for all too many migrants.”

One survivor from Senegal spoke of how he was brought by smugglers across Niger in a bus to the southern Libyan city of Sabha, where he was due to risk a boat trip to Europe. When the middleman did not get his fee, the survivor was put up for sale along with other passengers.

He was taken to a prison where he worked without pay while the captors demanded 300,000 West African francs (about £380) before selling him on to a larger jail. Livia Manante, an IOM officer based in Niger, said migrants would be brought to a square where they were put up for sale.

Manante said: “IOM Italy has confirmed that this story is similar to many stories reported by migrants and collected at landing points in southern Italy, including the slave market reports.”

Those who did not get their ransom paid were often taken away and killed while others would die of hunger and disease in unsanitary conditions.

“If the number of migrants goes down, because of death or someone is ransomed, the kidnappers just go to the market and buy one,” Manente said.

The going rate for a migrant was between $200 (£160) and $500 (£400) each, with many forced into captivity for months before they are freed or sold on. So far this year more than 170 bodies have washed up on the shores of the Mediterranean while the Libyan Coast Guard has also rescued thousands more.

IOM has helped repatriate 1,500 people back to West Africa so far this year where it is trying to inform people not to risk the journey to Libya where they face exploitation.

“Migrants who go to Libya while trying to get to Europe, have no idea of the torture archipelago that awaits them just over the border,” said Leonard Doyle, chief IOM spokesman in Geneva. “There they become commodities to be bought, sold and discarded when they have no more value.”

Sources: 

gazebros  asked:

i love those things where it’s like “the five times this almost happened and the one time it did” so maybe something with reddie in a secret relationship where it’s like the few times the losers -almost- caught them kissing and the one time they did?? sorry if that’s too specific haha

1. It was the last day of school and The losers were finally not freshman anymore. Eddie had stayed back for a few minutes in his last period class in hopes that he would miss Henry Bowers gang when he went out to find his friends. Eddie’s last class of the day was the only one that he had that didn’t have at least one other loser in it, so you could say that it’s been a pretty lonely year in his eight period Spanish class. After, about 10 minutes of waiting he figured that the coast would be clear and Henry would be gone “Is his life really that dull and empty that he would hang around at school on the last day just so he can mess with some asthmatic kid that can’t defend himself” Eddie thought to himself as he picked up his bag that was now light with a few empty binders and notebooks with hardly any paper left in them. He exited the classroom and stepped into the hallway scattered with papers and locker doors left open. There wasn’t really anyone left in the school even the teachers were eager to get away for there summer break. Eddie sighed in relief as he made his way to big doors, knowing that his friends were just on the other side waiting for him. “Hey you little fucker! Did you really think that you could hide from me.” He heard any angry voice hiss from behind him. Eddie turned around and there stood Henry Bowers, he was all alone which was unusual since Henry never seemed to get to far away from the rest of his gang, but Eddie just figured they were off harassing some other helpless kids, while Henry had business to tend to here. “I’m talking to you, you little bitch” Henry said getting closer. Eddie didn’t know what to do, he new he couldn’t run he wouldn’t make it far before he ran out of breath. besides Henry was much faster then him. “I-I was, I was um just-” Eddie had suddenly developed a stutter one that sounded quite similar to Bill’s. “You what” Henry spat out as he pushed Eddie against a locker placing an arm over his chest, holding him there. “Leave me alone dickhead” Eddie spoke trying to sound as brave as he possibly could, given his current situation. Eddie then brought up his right foot and kicked Henry as hard as he could on the shin. Henry cried out in pain but did not loosen his grip on Eddie. Instead he just pressed his arm harder into Eddie’s chest to the point to where it was getting hard for him to breath. “You’re gonna die, you little fagot” Henry said as he brought up his fist, Eddie clenched his eyes shut and prepared for the pain. “Get away from him you redneck asshole” Eddie heard a voice say from down the hallway. It wasn’t just any voice, but the voice of hid boyfriend Richie Tozier. “What the fuck did you call me, four eyes” Henry said as he let go of Eddie and started to walk towards Richie. “I said that you were a redneck asshole. and that you should probably be getting home. Daddy’s dick isn’t gonna suck itself” Richie said looking directly in the cold eyes of Henry Bowers. Henry did’t say anything, he just brought up his arm and collided his fist with Richie’s nose. Blood immediately gushed out and Richie’s hands went up to his face “Dick!” Richie yelled as he held his nose in his hands. “Richie are you okay.” Eddie said gently as he walked to his bleeding boyfriend “You’re next you little prick” Henry said as he grabbed Eddie’s shoulder roughly. “That’s enough Mr.Bowers” a teacher said entering the hallway.”School is over, you have no farther business here. Now leave before I give your father a call.”  Henry tensed at the mention of his father and let go of Eddie. “I’ll see you pussies later” he said before he walked out of the school. The teacher walked away to without even asking if Richie was okay. “Fucking dick” Eddie thought as he bent down to help his still bleeding boyfriend “ Are you okay Rich”. “Yeah don’t worry about me, I’m fine.” Richie said while whipping the blood from his nose on the back of his sleeve. Any other time Eddie would comment on how unsanitary that was but he bit his tongue because he knew that Richie was in pain and it was pretty much his fault. “I’m sorry you got hit” Eddie said while grabbing Richie’s hand in his own. Richie chuckled slightly. “How did he mange to be so damn cute all the time” Richie thought looking into Eddie’s sad brown eyes. “Ed’s I told you I’m fine. It doesn’t even hurt.” he lied. He then kissed Eddie’s cheek and brought him into a hug, thankful that he got there i time before it was his nose that got busted. Then the doors swung open again and the two boy’s parted fearing that Henry had returned, but instead in was the rest of there friends all with worried looks on there faces. “We were wondering what was taking so long” Stan said looking at his two friends. “Shit Rich you’re bleeding” Beverly said walking over to the glasses wearing boy “Really Bev I hadn’t noticed” Richie said sarcastically then flinched when she touched his nose. Eddie and Richie went on to tell them about what had happened, and the losers were so enthralled in the story and the concern of Richie’s nose that they had completely forgotten about the hug that they had witnessed between there two other friends.

2. Richie and Eddie were always trying to find paces to sneak around but since there town is so small it’s really hard for them. One day the losers were all going to the quarry to swim and Eddie and Richie saw this as there opportunity to get away so they both came up with excuses as to why they couldn’t go. So they ended up going to the movies because Eddie wanted to see “Dead Poets Society” and Richie thought it would be nice to cuddle with Eddie in a dark movie theater for two hours. So they walked in with there popcorn and candy and as soon as they sat down Richie grabbed Eddie’s hand and Eddie put is head on Richie’s shoulder with a small sigh of content that made Richie smile. Richie pressed his cheek to the top of Eddie’s head and just as he started getting comfortable they heard the movie theater door swing open. Richie’s head shot up and they both quickly released each others hands as they looked over and there stood the five other members of the losers club. “What are you g-guys d-doing here?” Bill asked. “Yeah I thought you guys said that you weren’t feeling good.” Stan added. “Yeah well we were both feeling better and uh-” Eddie started, “And we were gonna go meet you guys at the quarry but we figured it was to cold to swim so we came here instead” Richie finished for his boyfriend, hoping that they bought it. “Oh well us to” said Ben, “The water was freezing so we figured we’d just hang out here”. “How lucky that you guys were here to.” Bev said with a smile as Mike plopped down beside Eddie and playfully through his arm around him.The rest of the losers took there seats next to there friends as the movie began. “Well so much for cuddling with my boyfriend in dark movie theater for two hours” Richie thought.

3. It was one of the hottest days of they year and the losers were all gonna go to the park to get some ice cream to cool off, they all agreed to meet at Eddie’s house then go to the park together. Since they knew that Henry Bowers and his gang would be driving around looking for kids to harass they figured that there was safety in numbers and were better off going to the park together then showing up at different times alone. When Richie heard about this plan he decided to get to Eddie’s early in hopes that he could get to spend some time with him without the other losers around. Don’t get him wrong he loves his stupid fucking friends but he misses getting to do stupid gushy stuff with Eddie, like holding his hand, kissing his cheek, running his fingers through his hair as his head lays on his chest while they listen to whatever lame song Eddie is obsessed with that week, and all that lovey shit that Richie loves doing with him, but he would never say out loud. They hadn’t had much time alone together because it seemed like every time they get a moments peace someone always barges in on them. So when Richie knocked on Eddie’s door and Eddie opened it he wasted no time stepping inside slamming the door behind him and taking his smaller boyfriend into his arms and pressing his lips to his. Eddie’s lips always felt so soft they usually tasted like cough syrup which you’d think would bother Richie but it never did, the faint bitterness on the asthmatic boys lips was his favorite taste in the world.”God Richie” Eddie gasped as he gently put his hands on his taller boyfriends chest “You know you can’t kiss me without warning like that” the small boy said while taking small gasps of air “You could cause me” gasp “to have an” gasp “asthma” gasp “attack” Eddie said taking big breaths between every few words. “Come on Eds you know you love it.” Richie said with a smile as he used the one hand that wasn’t wrapped around Eddie’s waste to ruffle his hair. The smile on Richie’s face quickly faded when he noticed that Eddie’s breath had began to quicken. “Fuck Ed’s” Richie exclaimed as he quickly walked Eddie to his couch sat down and pulled him onto his lap. He reached into his pocket to grab the inhaler that he always carried around with him just in case the smaller boy might need it. He quickly popped the lid off ,stuck it in into Eddie’s mouth, and pushed the button. He felt Eddie’s body relax as his hands reached up to take over and take another puff off the inhaler. “That’s it baby breath” The glasses wearing boy said gently while he rubbed circles onto Eddie’s back. Eddie pulled the inhaler out of his mouth and put it on the table “You okay” Richie said wrapping an around Eddie’s waist hoping that he wouldn’t want to get up. “Yeah I’m good” Eddie said wrapping his arm lazily around Richie while pressing his forehead against his boyfriends,much to Richie’s delight. “Thank you” Eddie said softly “For what? Giving you a fucking asthma attack because I can’t keep in in my pants?” Richie said with a small chuckle. “No dumb ass” Eddie said rolling his eyes but keeping his forehead pressed against Richie’s. “For getting me the inhaler. I think it’s really cute that you always carry one around for me.” Eddie said wrapping his other arm around Richie’s neck. Eddie blushed at Eddie’s words and quickly tried to think of something witty to say. “ Yeah well I can’t have you dying on me Kasprak. Then who the hell would I make out with?” Richie said pulling Eddie even closer “Whatever you carry it around because you loooovveee meee” Eddie said, while singing the last part. “ Maybe a little bit” Richie whispered his lips just millimeters away from Eddie’s. Just as there lips touched they heard the dreaded knock coming from the other side of the door. “Come Eds let’s go” “Yeah hurry” they heard there friends shout from outside “One of these days Kasprak” Richie said with sigh “One of these days”

4.  The next time that the two boys were almost caught the losers were all over at Bill’s house for movie night. they were already halfway through ‘Back to the future part 2′ when Bev had proclaimed that they were out of popcorn. “o-okay” Bill stuttered “I’ll go g-get some m-more” he said as he started to get up. Richie quickly hopped off the couch and gently pushed Bill back down “Not to worry captain Bill” Richie said using his “army guy” voice “I will get the popcorn” he finished dramatically placing his hand on his chest. “But Ed’s it looks as though I will be needing your help, for I can not handle this mission alone” Richie continued looking at Eddie who was sitting on the floor next to Ben. “ You can’t get it yourself?” Stan asked looking at him. “Do you want the damn popcorn or not Stanley?” Richie spoke to his friend. Eddie and Richie then walked out of the living room and into the kitchen. “Real smooth drill Sargent, that did’t look suspicious at all”  Eddie whispered to the taller boy when there friends were out of earshot. “I’m sorry Eds but I saw my opportunity and I took it” Richie said putting his arms around Eddie and pulling him closer. “No Richie we can’t” Eddie said only half struggling to get away “Our friends are right outside” “Well then I guess you’re gonna have to be quiet then” Richie said before pressing his lips to Eddie’s. It didn’t take long for Eddie to start kissing back and to wrap his arms around Richie’s neck. Then they suddenly heard footsteps entering the kitchen and Eddie pushed Richie away from him and against the cabinet. “You guy’s haven’t even put the popcorn in yet?” Mike said as he entered the kitchen where the two boys were standing “Well hurry up you’re missing the movie” He said before walking back out again. “Well that was close” Richie said with a sigh “You think” Eddie said hitting Richie in the chest before stomping back into the living room.  

5.The last time that the boys were almost caught was at the quarry. The two boys had road there bikes down there hoping to spend some time alone together without any interruptions. They had only been there for about five minutes and  Richie had already made his sixth joke about Eddie’s mom.Eddie started to walk over to were Richie was standing ”if you don’t shut the fuck up Tozier I swear I’ll-” “You’ll what?” Richie said with a sneaky smile on his face as he wrapped his arms around Eddie’s neck. Eddie had the right mind to push over the cliff and into the water, but as he looked through the through lens of his boyfriend’s coke bottle glasses and straight into his big brown playful eyes, he couldn’t help but smile and melt into his touch. They both smiled as there lips touched and Richie’s hands went down to Eddie’s waste to pull him closer while Eddie’s fingers ran through Richie’s soft chocolate brown curls. “Hurry up guys let’s go!” a faint voice yelled, one that sounded strangely like Bev. “No. it could’t be”  Richie thought as he loosened his grip on his smaller boyfriend. “They’re all supposed to be at the library working on an English project” Richie’s thought continued “Oh no its them” his fears were confirmed when Eddie let go of Richie entirely and ran both of his small hands through his hair. Richie looked over and saw five familiar bikes coming out of the woods with five even more familiar faces riding them. “What do we do?” Eddie said looking to his boyfriend with wide eyes. Richie sighed. he hated seeing Eddie panic. “Just stay here” Richie said as he quickly grabbed his bike and headed to the opposite side woods, as fast as he could without being heard by the others. He hated leaving Eddie there all by himself, forcing him to come up with an excuse as to what he was doing there without any help, but Richie figured it would be easier to explain what one of them was doing there alone than what both of them were doing there together. They had been caught alone together a lot lately and were starting to run out of excuses. So Richie hid out in the woods for about fifteen minuets until he figured it was safe to emerge. So he rode in casually as if he had just arrived “What’s up fuckers” he said as he saw his friends sitting together laughing about whatever it was they were laughing about. “You losers thought you could have a party without inviting me” he said as he dropped his bike and walked to his friends. “We couldn’t find you smart ass” Stan said with an eye roll and a smile.”I wasn’t far” Richie said while he took a seat in between Mike and Ben he also shot a small wink at Eddie that the losers missed when they went back to there previous conversation, But Eddie caught it and smiled faintly hoping the blush wasn’t to noticeable as he felt it creep onto his cheeks.

6. The losers had been at the quarry almost all day swimming and having a good time, but it was past seven and was about to get dark, so they figured that they should be getting home. “Hey wait have you guys seen my inhaler, It’s not in my fanny pack” Eddie said while digging through his bag. “No. Did you look in your other fanny pack?” Ben said while hopping on his bike. “Yeah but it’s not in there.” “It’s fine Eds I’ve got an extra remember?” Richie said while he started to dig in his pocket to pull out the backup inhaler. “No Richie I need my inhaler.” Eddie said firmly looking Richie directly in the eyes, hoping that he would get the message. “I need my inhaler and I need you to stay here and help me look for it” Eddie continued. “Oh.” Richie said looking at Eddie. “You need me to stay here and help you look for your inhaler. Got it.” “Okay well see you g-guys later then.” Bill said while giving them a strange look. “Yeah good luck finding it you guys.” Mike added. As the rest of the gang rode away the boys immediately crashed there lips together. “Couldn’t find your inhaler huh?” Richie said in between kisses. “Hey it worked didn’t it” Eddie said while entangling his hand with Richie’s. “No” they heard coming from behind them. The boys turned around and saw there friends standing there with smiles on there faces. “I knew it.” Bev said happily “I knew that there was something going on between them.” “Yep. Ya know what ya caught us.” Richie said, letting go of Eddie and throwing his hands in the air. “Congratulations. Now will you losers please get the hell out of here so that I can make out with my boyfriend.” Richie practically screamed and Eddie’s face turned bright red. “Yeah no problem” Stan said picking up his bike again. “You two have fun” and after a few laughs and couple innocent jokes the Losers said goodbye to there friends and rode home. “Well” Eddie started “ At least now we might be able to get some time alone” To this Richie smiled and kissed his cheek, happy that they no longer had anything to hide from there friends.

Sorry this took so long.

Favorite Vauseman Scenes: My children of the corn.

I loooove this scene. Three of my favorite women together in a cornfield smoking crack. These women have all reached an ultimate low in their lives and they need an escape from all of the fucked up shit that’s going on with them. What I really like about this scene is Alex and Piper’s facial expressions towards each other when they both open up to what’s been going on with them.

Alex and Nicky are cracked out of their minds high and giddy and teasing Piper to take a hit with them. And Alex who knows Piper so well knows that there’s just no way Piper is willingly going to take a hit from the crack pipe because c’mon this is Piper. Piper would be too busy preaching about how unhealthy it is, unsanitary, and unsafe it would be to do crack or even share the same crack pipe. But to Alex’s surprise Piper says “fuck it give it here” and suddenly Alex snaps out of her high for a moment. She’s shocked and horrified even. Alex has done hard drugs before, she did heroin to cope with Piper leaving, it was a way to escape her pain, she was at her lowest. So even though Alex has yet to know what’s going on with Piper she understands that whatever Piper is going through it has got to be bad because Piper would never agree to do this.

Alex’s face goes through a journey of emotions when Piper agrees to take the crack. The first panel is shock that she would even consider taking the crack pipe because this is so not you. The second panel Alex hesitates for like a fraction of a second like she wants to intervene, maybe go as far as to even  smack the pipe out of her hand but doesn’t. And you can literally almost see her thinking “this isn’t right.”

The third panel Alex is disturbed that whoah Piper is REALLY going to do this and also still very horrified that this is even happening. The fourth panel Alex watches as Piper takes a hit and she looks at her like she doesn’t even recognize her. The final panel I interpreted as guilt and concern, guilt for maybe not stopping her, knowing this is bad, and concern because obviously she still cares and maybe even hates that she does because she’s trying not to feel right now. Piper shows Alex the brand on her arm and while her response is rather humorous the concern is still there its just laced with the effects of the crack.

Alex is taking crack to escape the pain of her reality but seeing Piper this way is fucking with her high, which is why she was so quick to tell Nicky to “give me that shit again.”

And I’ve said this many times before but for the sake of this post I’ll mention it once more. Just like Alex’s face goes through a journey of emotions so does Piper’s. When Alex confesses to what she’s been going through. Piper snaps out of her high when Alex said she killed someone

All of Piper’s thoughts and emotions can be read in this single screen shot: I wasn’t there, she told me I didn’t listen, Alex killed someone, she’s in pain.

Alex tearfully confesses: “Last month Kubra sent someone in here to kill me… LIKE I SAID HE WOULD!” It was a jab at Piper: I told you and you didn’t listen to me.  Alex probably wouldn’t be suffering right now had Piper listened to her and acknowledged her fears but instead Piper chose to treat it like a joke, treat her like she was insane and her fears were all in her head. So Piper is partially to blame for the shitty situation that Alex is in. Who honestly would’ve thought that crack would’ve caused Piper to realize just how high up she was on this Mount Everest pile of shit she created.

After Alex confessed NOW Piper wants to console her but Alex doesn’t want her comfort and pushes her away. Partly because Alex doesn’t like to show weakness and the other part being: “Bitch, where the hell was your comfort last month? Don’t try to console me now.” Piper at this point is going to have to work to get Alex’s trust back but until then she doesn’t deserve to be forgiven so easily.

Lastly on a lighter note: Alex “hiding” behind that little corn stalk made me giggle and Nicky’s facial expressions were hilarious especially when Alex said that they were sitting on Aydin’s chopped up dead body and she’s looking around like what the fuck?

I’ve heard claims that Giorno is a half-vampire

As stupid as that is, I wonder if being only being half-vampire means instead of blood, you’re compelled to consume other bodily fluids.

It would explain a lot.

Meihem- First Kiss

“I told you, you should not have been following me! Those awful bombs of yours ruined the inside of that poor bakery!” Mei sat leaning against a brick wall in one of the far back alleys of Dorado, her boots off and one of her leggings pulled up as she applied bandages to some of her scrapes and bruises.

Junkrat sat across from her, back hunched like an angry cat as he tended to his own minor cuts, though with less anti-septic and more ‘spit and dirt’ techniques. He glared back at her, snorting a bit. “And I told you, I just happened to be going in that direction at the same time. We’re both backlines, darl, get used to the idear of having me around. And I don’t believe I’ve gotten a thank you, yet. So I’m just gonna say ‘you’re welcome’ in advance.”

“Who are you expecting a thank you from, the nice family whose building you blew up?”

“So you’re not even going to mention the what, four or five mercenary blokes what had you cornered in there? I saw you ducking in that bakery to reload. What were you gonna do in the meantime? Bash ‘em with baguettes? Sock ‘em with sourdough? Pulverize ‘em with…with…”

Mei thought for a moment, “Pumpernickel?”

“Yeah! Thanks, love.” He spat on his gloved palm, wiping away a rivulet of blood from his knee. “And again, you’re welcome, for getting those drongos off you.”

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z-0013  asked:

Oooo I have a headcannon request! RFA +V 7 minutes in heaven?

(✿╹◡╹) hello :3 this will be pure fluff because i don’t write nsfw, hope you don’t mind! they aren’t dating in this one btw~

YOOSUNG :

~he accepted to playing this game without knowing what was going to happen

~7 minutes in heaven sounded pure to him

~ofc seven had a completely different idea and was trying to set him up with mc

~it was so rigged to land on mc for yoosungs turn

~don’t question sevens magic

~zen started yelling cheering on yoosung

~”guys wyd i’m just going to talk to her for 7 minutes”

~once they had gone into the closet together mc told him what the point of the game actually was

~tHIS BOI TURNED SO RED

~mc reassured him they didn’t have to do said things and could just talk

~so they spend 7 minutes just talking

~more or less yoosung talking about LOLOL and mc listening

SEVEN :

~hE WANTED MC ALL TO HIMSELF

~wolf

~he suggested the game

~he rigged said game

~but once he was in the closet with mc they told him they didn’t want to do anything sexual they just wanted to enjoy his company
~kokoro go doki doki

~so they just talked about memes

~why wouldn’t they

~and seven just told really bad puns they didn’t even make the seven minutes cause zen was outside (making sure nothing weird was going on) and he stopped them because he couldn’t handle the puns

JUMIN :

~what is a seven minutes in heaven

~luciel is this a game where we die and go to heaven?

~this game wasn’t rigged

~he still got to go into the closet with mc

~he stood in the closet

~why would i sit on a floor that is unsanitary

~he didn’t know what to actually do

~mc stood up with him and just kinda stood there and hugged this precious bean

~for seven

~minutes

~that’s all just hugging in silence

ZEN :

~bOI HE WANTED TO GO INTO THE CLOSET JUST TO DO 18+ THINGS

~but i think the fuck not zenny boi

~once in said closet with mc he kissed them

~but they refused to go any further than cuddling and kissing in the closet

~”mc wHY”

~that’s really all that happened for seven minutes

~other than zen talking about how gr8 he looked

~and mc agreeing

~we agree zen

~we agree

JAEHEE :

~flustERED BEAN

~she has heard of the game

~never played it until now

~you held her hand before she had spun it and when it landed on you she was really happy

~wow my best friend yAY

~gal pals

~nothing special went on just lovely conversations

~and talk about what aesthetics the coffee shop should have

V :

~TOO PURE OF A BOI

~knows the game but his intention is just a good conversation

~he  is too pure

~once you got into the closet the first thing he said was that he just wanted to talk

~and that’s all that happened

~but at the end of it you kissed him quickly and smiled and left the closet

i only use pads for menstruation bc of price but they are very annoying also and i just get sick of them after like 3 days and i just rough it for the next like four

Cappuccino- Childhood Friends AU (Taehyung)

genre: fluff 

words: 1544 

prompt: Childhood friends taehyung au? Where he miss you after 4 years without communication?


His fingertips grazed against the grass, enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun with her right by his side. When she was little, every summer she came to visit her grandparents’ farm and play with the little animals.

 

Taehyung always visited her grandparents as well. This started when they found him wandering around their farm, curious on what did they plant and observed how they changed. The old couple was very kind and they let him come anytime he wanted, to which he eagerly accepted.

 

He found her sitting at the grassfield, his safe haven. He was 8 and she was 7. She sat there with her head tilted up towards the yellow-orange sky, with her cat he assumed, on her lap. He walked towards her and she let out a little yelp at his sudden appearance, making him laugh.

“You scared me! Don’t you ever do that again!” She pouted and huffed.

He was amused with her fuming face. Her cheeks were pink and the way they puffed made her look like she was 5.

“Who are you?” Her small, brown eyes gazed at him with curiosity.

“I’m Taehyung. Pleasure to meet ya!” He gave her a grin with a missing tooth or two and she laughed and shook his hand. “I’m Y/N.”

 

Ever since, they started to wander around the farm together. Her grandparents were happy that the both of them found each other and they grew fond of each other. Her grandmother would always find it hard to separate the both of them. Whether it be eating cookies, both of them would always share even a glass of milk. She would scold her since it was unsanitary to share one glass with someone. “But Gramma, he’s my best friend, kind of like a family to me. I don’t mind sharing at all!” She sighed in defeat and she let her share with him.

 


 

It’s been four years since he saw her but she never left his mind. After being scouted, he never spoke to her again. He was happy to be able to fulfill his dream being an artist . His co-members were absolutely nice and funny. He loved being an idol, being able to meet new people and he thanked each one of them who appreciated his hard work. But he felt that something was still lacking.


“y/n stop throwing those pineapples at me! I know how much you hate them on pizza but you don’t have to throw them to me.” He glared at her and she shrugged. He was 17 and she was 16.

“Meh, I don’t care. I like throwing them at you.” She threw another pineapple at him and he quickly caught it with his mouth, chewing it with a smirk on his face. She rolled her eyes at her cockiness.

 

“What would happen if we got separated?” She randomly asked. He froze and it was his turn to throw a pillow. “I won’t allow it.” They were attached to the hip. She hook her head. “I wouldn’t allow it either. Come one let’s watch a movie.”

 


 

She invited him to go to the city and he quickly agreed. Her family warmly welcomed him and offered him to go and tour him around the city, to which she volunteered to do. She knew how uncomfortable he still felt around her family and he was more than happy to know that she was going with him.

 

Taehyung tightly held onto her fingertips, afraid that he might get lost. He was 18 but he still felt a bit vulnerable around strange places.Her tracks stopped and soon he followed. He looked at her amd wondered she stopped, only to find her gazing at the tall building with hopeful eyes.

“I wanted to be an artist Tae…”

“Then why don’t you become one? You can sing, dance and hell you can rap!” She gave a small smile.

“My Dad doesn’t want me to.” She smiled but sadness was visible on her face.

He frowned. He knew that he couldn’t do anything but he wanted to help. She started tugging his hands but came to a halt again when they were faced with a man. She froze and her eyes widen.

“Who is he?” He asked.

“Uh.. A..” She stuttered.

“I’m sure she’s aware that I’m here to scout and my boy you’re lucky.”

Her grasp loosen and her eyes were looking down on the floor.

“what?”

“Come with me boy and I’ll train you. Albeit you’ll be a great performer!” He held his wrist and dragged him towards the building. “Wait! Y/N! Don’t choose me choose her.” She calmly smiled at him. “It’s okay Tae, just go. I know you’ll do well.” She waved at him one last time as he followed the man, his heart heavy from taking her dream away.

 


 

He walked around the city again with a cap and mask, remembering the times they walked into different coffee shops just to compare their coffees. He laughed at the memory of her having to throw up after drinking 10 cups of coffee and he held her hair. He knew he loved having her with him and it was a horrible memory that he left her behind.

He sighed and walked into the first coffee shop you went to back then. He pulled his mask down and the scent of coffee and oatmeal cookies invaded his senses. “Nostalgic…” He breathed and he walked towards the counter. “Iced Cappuccino would be nice. V.” He gave the girl behind counter his name and he walked back to his seat, waiting for his name to be called.

His fingers tapped against the table, still recalling those small moment he had with her. He remembered that she ordered her favorite blueberry cheesecake and she shoved a huge slice of it in his mouth, making him slightly choke. He shook his head with a small smile playing on his face. “I really do miss her.”

“V! For customer V!” Was it possible to lift your head less than a second? He was sure he was going to break his neck when he did. That voice sounded so familiar, and blood felt like they were cold water running in his veins. He gulped as he walked towards the claiming section, scared that his speculation was wrong.

He wasn’t though.

There she stood with a wide smile on her face as she held the cup towards him. Her soft brown hair was now cut short  and hidden under her cap but she looked even more beautiful than he remembered. Her cheeks were a shade of soft pink and her eyes widen at the sight of him.

“Tae…?” He swore he felt that he was going to melt right on the spot.

“Come on just get that damn coffee!” The man behind him yelled and he jumped a little walking back to his seat. She went back to work, handing the coffee to the grumpy customer, but her mind wandered off.

“Chief, can I get a few minutes of break?” Her manager smiled and nodded. “Go ahead. Looks like you need it.” She gave him a smile and thanked him.

She immediately rushed out to him, calling out his name before he left the café. He looked around for her and he found her running towards him and shamelessly hugging him. He was startled at first. He thought that she was upset with him. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, and nuzzled his nose on the crook of her neck. She can’t fight the tears anymore.

“You don’t know how much I’ve missed you.” He sighed and held her waist even tighter but she looseness her hold. She pulled back a little and gave him a little glare. “Taehyung I’ve waited four years for you! You don’t know painful it was for me… We didn’t even talk.”

“I know… Besides time constraint, I was scared to contact you.”

“Why?”

“I took away your dream.”

She smiled at him and held his cheek. “Tae, you don’t have to worry about that. I found that there are much more important things I should focus on. I guess that dream was just a small wish and I knew I wouldn’t really reach it.”

“Bu-” She put a finger on his lips.

“Sh. Like I said, there are more important things I need to focus on. Like you.”

“M-me?”

“Kim Taehyung, I’ve been in love with ever since puberty started.” He laughed at her confession but at the same time his heart pounded. He never thought she would confess first.

He held her face and slowly brought her closer to his. He always wondered how her lips felt. He pressed his lips against hers, making her wrap her arms around his neck. She felt like she was about to explode. Her longing of his presence finally washed away with a sweet kiss.

He slowly pulled back with his forehead resting on hers, one hand on her neck and the other, brushing his fingertips on her hair.

“I love you Y/N, more than you know it.” She looked at him with a sweet smile and sighed.

“I’m glad you remembered this café.”

“hell I’m glad I did.”


Hello! This is my first scenario and I hope you guys like it. 

I honestly love Taehyung mehehe. But I love all of the Bangtan boys, :* 

Enjoy reading!

admin: pastelhans

Cherry (Part 5)- wolf!jikook story

There’s been a lot of changes since Jungkook became friends with Taehyung. Not that he’s caused a rift in Jimin’s and Taehyung’s relationship, for the two are always together, giggling about something. At school, they’re the best of friends.

Most of the drama happens at the Friday sleepovers, anyways.

1) Jimin’s constantly separating the two with his body if they get a little too close. Taehyung makes it a point to nuzzle Jungkook’s neck whenever he wants, which is basically all the time, regardless of who’s in the room. When this happens, Jimin’s over there in less than a second, clawing at his face and threatening to tell his mom.

“You’re a bad wolf!” Jimin growls after shoving him away from Jungkook, wrapping an arm around Jungkook’s tiny shoulders. “You can’t lick his ears!”

“They taste good,” Taehyung grins. “Like cotton candy.”

“Idiot!”

2) When it’s time to sleep, Jimin and Jungkook always share a sleeping bag.

Taehyung started this tradition by creeping into Jungkook’s sleeping bag one night and snuggling into the blankets. When Jimin had lazily cracked open an eye and caught sight of that extra bulge in the sheets, his ears had instantly perked and his body practically flew through the air.

“Out!” he kept pushing at the sheets, growling and snarling. “It’s not your sleeping bag, Taehyung! Get off!”

When Taehyung had rushed out, Jimin made himself at home in the sleeping bag, Jungkook’s body right next to his. The beach scent was quickly replaced with cherries, and Taehyung stood outside the sleeping bag, complaining.

“Why can you sleep with Kook but I can’t?” Taehyung whined, pulling up his baggy pajama pants.

“I’m his neighbor,” Jimin huffed happily, tail batting against Jungkook’s knee underneath the covers. “That means we’re best friends.”

Really, Jungkook didn’t mind who slept in his sleeping bag; both of them were warm. However, he enjoyed the scent of cherries much more than the beach.

3) Jimin cried when he found out that Jungkook only invited Taehyung to the city’s waterpark for a playdate.

Listen to this! Jungkook constantly talked to Jimin about the waterpark, wondering why the older wolf seemed to dislike the place. Whenever he’d mention swimming there, Jimin would tell him how ‘unsanitary’ and ‘boring’ it was.

“I only went there once, and it was so boring! I also got this sunburn on my back.” As if the mark would still be there, Jimin had lifted his shirt and pointed at a random part of his back. “It was here!”

So Jungkook was surprised to hear that Jimin, after hearing Taehyung boast about their upcoming playdate, hid in his room and bawled. Jimin’s mother was quite irritated, not understanding that Jimin didn’t like the waterpark. Jungkook’s heard his complaints many times! She should know what her son likes and doesn’t like

“Do you wanna come with us?” Jungkook had asked, lifting up the blanket Jimin was hiding under.

Wiping away the tears from his chubby cheeks, Jimin glanced up at him with hurt eyes. “Y-Yeah.”

“I thought you hated the pool, Jimin.”

“Not w-when I’m with you.”